Disclaimer: The following story can be termed as shameless wish fulfillment. The author, aka me, will not be liable for any brain damage caused by the story. Please take necessary precautions like turning off your brain, before attempting to read it. Thank you.

A usual morning in the Hikgaya household consisted of Hachiman leaving the house at the earliest followed by Komachi and his parents. After all, Hachiman's company slave parents rarely ever came back home before midnight due to work so they usually liked to sleep in for as long as possible.

Now if you asked Hachiman whether he liked this or not, he would answer without a shadow of a doubt that he hated it. While he was more than mature enough to handle not having parents around, it hurt Komachi more than she showed.

Therefore, for the first time since Hachiman recovered from his accident, the daily routine of the Hikigaya household was disturbed and the culprit was currently sitting in the living room, facing his parents.

"Shouldn't you leave for school already, Hachiman? Is something wrong?" Hachiman's mother, Hikigaya Akane was the source of Komachi's good looks. While she might not have given him any of her genes when it came to looks, the patented Hikigaya ahoge was something that he and Komachi had inherited from her. Speaking of his mother, Hachiman could genuinely say that his relationship with her was so-so at best. The woman had spent most of her better years doting on Komachi (a decision he begrudgingly understood since Komachi was far less mature than he had been at that age.) and sometimes seemed to forget that he too was her son. That said, Hachiman had long grown past the stage of longing for parental affection.

"Is something the matter, Hachiman?" Hachiman's father, Hikigaya Hiroshi was probably the only member of the household that didn't seem to forget that he existed. The old man was the source of his motto, 'to work is to lose' and he just so happened to be the source of his dreaded dead fish-eyes. (Something Hachiman would have been happy to not inherit.) A middle-aged man of average build, the older Hikigaya had long been outgrown by his son.

"I wanted to say something to both of you and the only time either of you have the time to make this conversation work, is in the morning like right now." Hachiman started. Sensing that he was about to say something serious, both his parents took a seat. Komachi was standing in the back, listening to the conversation as she prepared to leave for school.

"I prefer not to beat around the bush so I will come out and say it. Tou-san, Kaa-san, I want both of you to stop working from today onwards." Hachiman said. To their credit, his parents did not show any outward sign of surprise, remaining calm.

"Hachiman, do you understand the gravity of what you are saying? How will we live if we stop working? You should know that you have to apply for university next year and that will cost money. How will the bills get paid? We are barely scraping by as is." Hiroshi explained calmly.

"Tou-san, do you remember the time that Komachi ran away from home?" Hachiman started.

"Of course. That was too scary for me to forget."

"You might not know this but since that day, I made a decision that I would do everything in my power to try and fix this family before it is too late. I am sorry that it took me this long but I have finally accomplished my goal." Hachiman stood up and took out the share certificate from the system space before handing it to his stunned parents.

"That is the ownership certificate for ten percent of KT Constructions Ltd. In the market, that will be worth around Ten Billion Yen. I will transfer it to your name and the dividend from it should be more than enough for us to live comfortably without working for the foreseeable future. I have other investments too but those aren't solid enough for me to reveal for now. I hope this will finally clarify what I wanted to say." Hachiman finished before taking a seat on the couch. Both his parents were busy checking the authenticity of the document as well as verifying something on the net.

After a while of silence, Hiroshi finally spoke up. "Hachiman, this is incredible! How did you manage to do this?!"

"I started with the New Year's gift money that you gave me and built up from there. That is why it took me nearly five years to accomplish this." It was a lie, but they did not need to know that.

"Even still, to think that you made billions in just a few years. You must be some sort of business prodigy, Hachiman." His mother praised him and he could see that she meant it.

"So will you stop working? I wasn't lying when I asked you that. I will take all responsibilities for this household in the future. To be extra safe, we can transfer those shares to one or both of your names for security."

"There is no need for that my son. Even if you did transfer it, we would not know what to do with it. We understand that you are completely serious. We will trust you and hand in our resignation today." Hiroshi sounded proud as he said this to which Akane simply nodded.

"Thank you, Tou-san, Kaa-san."

"No, thank you, Hachiman. Very few parents are lucky enough to have children that care about them as much as you do. We are lucky to have you."

With the events in the house done, Hachiman made his way to school. Of course, he was scolded by Hiratsuka-sensei for fifteen minutes straight but that was to be expected.

With everything at home sorted out for now, Hachiman was completely at peace while sitting and reading a Light Novel in the Service Club. As usual, only the two of them were present in the room and everything was calm. That is until a third party promptly puts an end to their peace.

"Yahallo!" The first thought that came to Hachiman's head when he saw the newcomer was 'Huge'. For some reason, Yukinoshita turned her head towards him and showed an expression of disgust. The second thought he had was, 'What kind of a greeting is Yahallo?'. It sounded like someone trying to say hello but trying to make it sound cooler.

The newcomer was a girl who appearance-wise, was the polar opposite of Hachiman's club president. Her bubblegum-pink hair was short and was cut above her shoulders and she was anything but slender unlike the resident Yuki-onna. *shudder*. Hachiman could have sworn that he had seen her somewhere before but he couldn't, for the life of him, remember where.

"Hiki-lecher-kun, stop looking at our potential client like you are planning to commit a sexual offense or else I will have to contact the police." The President was kind enough to break the ice.

"What is Hikki doing here?!" The intruder shrieked like she was studying to become a banshee as she pointed her fingers towards him.

"One, did no one teach you that pointing fingers is rude, woman? And two, who the hell is Hikki? I don't know such a person." Hachiman crossed his arm as he sized up the girl.

"Don't be rude, Hikigaya-kun. But I suppose I can let this instance slide since she is the one at fault. How can we help you, Yuigahama Yui-san of Class 2-F?" Yukisnoshita asked calmly.

"2-F? Isn't she from my class then?" Hachiman was surprised. Then again, that might explain the familiarity that he had felt when he saw her.

"To not even know your classmates. Perhaps, you are sadder than I expected you to be, Hiki-lonely-kun."

"Hey! It's not my fault that they are so forgettable. I can remember important people just fine, like you or Hiratsuka-sensei or Hiratsuka-sensei or you." Hachiman trailed off, knowing full well that he was simply digging his own grave at this point.

"Hey! Hikki is speaking normally. I thought you had some problems with that." Yuigahama chirped in.

"For the last time, my name isn't Hikki, it's Hikigaya Hachiman. You know, as in the god of war Hachiman Boddhisatva?"

"Let us set aside your name for now Hiki-I have a forgettable face-gaya-kun. Could you tell us why you are here, Yuigahama-san?" Yukinoshita asked.

"Hiratsuka-sensei told me that I could get my wishes granted if I came here. This is the Service Club, isn't it?"

"We are indeed the Service club. However, we do not grant wishes. We are only able to help you to try and accomplish what you want to do." Yukinoshita explained calmly. "So, what can we help you with, Yuigahama-san?"

"I wanted to learn how to bake cookies." Yuigahama said. "I had a boy that I wanted to give it to but I don't know how to bake."

"Go Explode You Freaking Normie!" Hachiman lashing out was completely unexpected and startled the girls. "Sorry, I accidentally said what I was thinking out loud." Hachiman apologized immediately afterward.

"Hikigaya-kun, we should have a conversation on your thought processes in the future but for now, let us help Yuigahama-san. You too shall accompany us, Hikigaya-kun. You shall be of use as a test dummy for the produce."

The walk to the home education department was short, even by Yukinoshita's non-existent physical standards. As soon as the trio reached there, Yukinoshita and Yuigahama had donned aprons and started the cooking lessons.

Hachiman was not very good at cooking. Even if he did dream of being a househusband, cooking was a skill that completely eluded him. Hachiman could cook up a few basic dishes like curry but for the most part, his culinary catalog was sorely lacking. That said, even a greenhorn like him could see that Yukinoshita was a good, possibly great cook from how she explained things to Yuigahama. Said girl was trying her best to listen attentively to whatever Yukinoshita was telling her. Soon, it was time for them to bake.

The whole baking process was completed relatively fast due to the availability of a high-quality oven which made the baking part easier. After a while, the oven made a sound which indicated that it was finished and Yukinoshita took out a tray of cookies that looked delicious.

"This is great, Yukinoshita." Hachiman gave genuine praise.

"Thank you, Hikigaya-kun. Now your turn, Yuigahama-san. Please feel free to ask if you have any doubt." In hindsight, that line will go down in history as one of the top three lines said just before a disaster.

"You know, this is kind of impressive in its own right. The fact that you somehow managed to create a chemical weapon from nothing more than some dough and sugar is just mind-boggling."

Hachiman knew that Yuigahama had issues with cooking but he had grossly underestimated the depth of the issues. Yuigahama's cookies, if you could call it that, was the perfect example of Murphy's Law, everything that can go wrong will go wrong. The charcoal-like substance in his hands was like the devil, beckoning him to let it in and open a doorway to hell. There was no chance for him to eat it.

"How did you manage to do it so wrong, Yuigahama-san?" Yukinoshita was speechless.

"I know the answer." Hachiman answered. "She did every step wrong and the quantities she took were all wrong. Even the oven is set at the wrong temperature." Hachiman explained calmly. Because he had God-level fighting skills given by the system, it was a piece of cake for him to carefully observe someone's movements.

"Yuigahama-san, you will stop trying to do it your way and do as I tell you." Yukinoshita sighed.

"Sorry, Yukinon. I'll be careful."

The fact that she could give a nickname to the resident Ice Witch the same day she met her was nothing short of impressive.

"Hikigaya-kun, why do I have a feeling that you just thought of something incredibly rude, just now?"

"You must have imagined it." Hachiman whistled innocently.

To Yukinoshita's and Yuigahama's credit, the second batch of cookies produced by Yuigahama looked like it was edible, even if barely. Of course, the cookies had no shape but anything was an improvement from the chemical weapons of the first try.

"Try it, Hikigaya-kun." Yukinoshita was adamant that he took a bite.

"Here goes nothing." Hachiman did as asked and took a bite. "It isn't bad." He was telling the truth. "It was burned a little but is still good enough to eat." He gave his honest reply.

"I see. That is good then. Yuigahama-san, you should continue practicing for now. Let us finish today's session here." Yukinoshita said.

"Say, Yuigahama, you said that you are doing this for a guy, right? So, let me give you some free advice. Guys don't care much about the taste of cookies as much as they care about who is giving them. As long as it is from a cute girl like yourself, they will eat anything." Hachiman said. For some reason, the girl got a bit red but that was probably because she stood too close to the oven.

"What about you, Hikki?"

"Hmmm?"

"You said that every guy will be happy to get cookies from a cute girl, right? Does that include you?"

"Nah! I would probably start worrying about whether the girl in question has some sort of ulterior motives or not." Hachiman explained.

Afterward, the three of them parted ways and Hachiman made his way to an ATM.

As an avid reader of urban novels, Hachiman was very well aware of the tropes that plagued the MCs of such novels including but not limited to getting into fights at every corner. Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on who you ask, Hachiman lived in a city that was relatively safe compared to bigger cities like Tokyo when it came to illegal activities. That said, Chiba did have its fair share of delinquents. So, when Hachiman wanted to withdraw some money from the ATM, he went out of his way to find one that was located on a crowded street with a police booth nearby, eliminating any potential unwanted cliches from happening. The skills given by the system might be more than enough for him to put a few hundred people out of commission by himself but why fight when you could avoid the situation in its entirety? After making sure that no one was following him or even noticed him, Hachiman withdrew 100k from the ATM before safely putting it in his bag and going home.

"Komachi, I'm home." He announced as usual.

"Oh! Welcome back, Hachiman." His mother had been the one to answer him. She was vacuuming the living room as she said this.

"Kaa-san? Does that mean that everything went smoothly?" Hachiman asked.

"Yes. Your father and I have officially retired from work. So, we are in your care, Hachiman." She said.

"And where is Tou-san?"

"He is sleeping in his room. He did have a lot of sleep to burn through."

"I'll freshen myself up." Hachiman said before going to his room.

For the first time in a while, dinner at the Hikigaya household had all four members present, much to the delight of Komachi who had been informed that her parents had stopped working. As such, dinner was a lively affair. Even Hachiman had to agree that he preferred it this way.

After dinner, before Hachiman was about to sleep, he received a call from an unknown number.

"Hello?" Hachiman answered.

"Is this Hikigaya Hachiman-san?" The voice at the other end sounded like it belonged to a middle-aged man.

"Yes. Who might you be?" Hachiman asked politely.

"My name is Nakano Maruo. I am the Director of the Serenity Medical Institute in the North of Chiba."

"I know that hospital. I used to be admitted there when I got into an accident last year. So, how can I help you Nakano-san? I do not believe we have met before." The hospital in question was one of the best in not just Chiba but the entirety of Japan and Hachiman was particularly fond of the staff there who had taken good care of him.

"I will keep it brief Hikigaya-san. I wanted to enquire about the apartment that is under your ownership, number 2B in the Market District, to be exact. I have heard that there is a vacancy on one of the floors and would like to rent it. Will it be possible?"

"There are no problems, Nakano-san. We do have one vacant floor. The rent is 200k per month but according to standard procedures, you will have to pay two months rent in advance as security. It will be given back to you at the end of the tenure." This was information that Hachiman had learned from a book called 'Landlording for Idiots'.

"That is acceptable. When can we write a contract? I would like to make it as soon as possible if you aren't inconvenienced."

"If you can arrange a lawyer to prepare the contract, I can sign it at any time."

"Great, then could I trouble you to visit me at the hospital? I have been busy these days and don't get a lot of free time."

"Okay. I will come tomorrow at 4 PM." With that, Hachiman went to sleep.

Hello there. I did not plan on writing a chapter so soon but strike the iron while its hot is what the old people say and I happen to be free right now. That said, I did not expect the level of support that the last chapter got. I was thinking of maybe ten people following but the numbers are far more. As long as the support remains the same, the chapter updates will be consistent.

As for the chapter itself, there isn't much to say. As a writer, I like to think that I have become better at writing conversations compared to a lot of my old stories so feel free to give your input.

Also, the first batch of crossover girls are arriving soon and ten cyber cookies to anyone who can guess them based on this chapter. Feel free to mention it as reviews.

See ya.