Christmas wasn't like this. Christmas wasn't stress and scheduling. Christmas wasn't family and friends wanting you at opposite corners of the state on the same damn day. And most of all, Maki Nishikino knew, CHRISTMAS WASN'T CRYING.

She glanced over her shoulder. Dia, her daughter, a week and two days from her first birthday, sat, mouth open, fists waving, SCREAMING.

Christmas wasn't crying, Maki repeated to herself, Christmas wasn't crying. Please don't let me start crying.

Maki hummed. Desperately. Dia did not have a favorite Christmas carol yet. As smart and deft as Dia was for her age group, she had yet to develop the capacity to create a holiday playlist.

Big inhale, Calmest voice Maki could manage, tinged with desperation.

"Dia, please, please stop crying. Mama can't take it."

Maki's hands gripped the steering wheel, Dia's high wails drilling into her ears. It was getting more and more difficult to stay focused on the road. Suddenly, a miracle and her headlights were catching unfamiliar food and lodging signs. Some small town probably, but not one that had been invaded by vampiric chain restaurants sucking all the community out. Maki could take the next exit, soothe Dia, find a cute place to get food and coffee for sanity's sake, maybe check into a hotel for the night. And then when she woke up the morning, Maki would give in to the urge to turn the car around and drive back home. If her parents were too busy to visit or head to the mountain camp, that was a choice they made and not an excuse to guilt trip Maki and Dia into a holiday trip to Boston. Once they got out of the mountains, traffic would be impossible and Maki would be even more stressed. Why had she agreed to this?

The answer was childhood memories – or brainwashing, years of happy times with her parents during the holidays, at their mountain camp. Maki wanted Dia to have those. So of course, the plan was to have Dia's first Christmas at the camp. Maki figured everyone would be eager, especially with her parents so excited by the next generation of Nishikinos to spoil. They had long given up on Maki marrying but celebrated when Maki had decided she wanted a family. Dia's arrival had been a glad day in Nishikino family history. Maki a a mother was determined to do better than her parents, pay more attention, demand less. Dia wouldn't be lonely, left for work, told to keep busy studying while other family's children were cared for.

Exit. Drive. Turn – flip coin in head, turn left. Shush Dia. Pull over. Dia gets blessedly quiet for a minute when the car stops. Maki grabs her smartphone, Maps their location, searches for an open coffeeshop with food. At six o'clockish, it was a longa shot, but if there was one, it would probably be a quiet, toward the end of the day mood. Yes, two point eight miles up the road, Clara's Coffee and Cafe.

"Found us a place, Dia."

Dia burbled.

"We'll get you changed and fed and refuel Mama."

Dia had no objections.

One point two miles in and suddenly a town sprang up, decorated trees in front of every building, large windows, burnished mellow mahoghany woods, snowflake lights draped everywhere, pine trees a border of coziness. Something landed on the windshield. Was it snowing? Maki rolled down her window, inhaled a soft cold, stuck a hand out the window to feel the wet kiss of a Christmas snowflake on her palm. She smiled for the first time in hours. Dia seemed to be singing her own version of smashed together Christmas carols, nonsense syllables adding messy charm.

There it was: Clara's Coffee and Cafe, the corner anchor of a row of little shops, all still open. From the sign, Clara seemed to be a Nutcracker reference. Many of the shops had customers bustling in and out, last minute shopping a national comfort. Clara's seemed empty, but it was open for another couple hours. and a parking slot waited for Maki right out front. Welcoming. She parked, popped out, stretched.

"MAMA!"

"Just give me a minute, Dia. Mama loves you, but Mama needs her blood to move."

The town's atmosphere was picture perfect holiday vibes: quiet, cozy, sparkling, friendly, bringing Maki back to her best memories of this season, pushing away this December's increasing frustrations.

Maki unbuckled Dia.

"Let's get you inside, bun. I bet you're hungry."

The door chimes had a pleasant, tinkling tone, very Christmasy. Maki approved.

"Welcome to Clara's." A peppy, peppermint voice chirped, "Come in from the cold and let Nico Ni make your day better."

Some kind of midnight haired, red stripe hatted Christmas elf, surely she wasn't really half Maki's size, bounced out to wave, startling Maki into a backwards swerve, protecting the back of Dia's head with her hand.

"Whoa, there. Nico didn't mean to startle you, pretty lady." Holly berry eyes twinkled.

The elf person could not have sounded sweeter. Dia was suddenly fascinated, twisting to turn her head around and making annoyed chucks at Maki who still had her in lockdown.

"May I?" The elf reached out her hands. "Nico's great with kids and you look like you're about to pass out."

Maki did feel light kneed and weak headed. Dropping Dia would not be peak parenting. The elf seemed to have sure hands.

"What's their name?"

"Dia." Maki knew that one.

"Hi Dia." The elf immediately chirruped. "I'm Nico. I'm going to take care of your Mom and you."

"Mama."

Nico raised an eyebrow.

"She calls me Mama." Maki explained, not sure why she started this and positive she was getting redder every second, "There's no other mom." Solid move there, Nishikino, she told herself. Cute elf takes your child with some arbitrary degree of confidence, you scream out the most awkward version of "I AM NOT STRAIGHT" ever spoken.

"Okay, Dia. Nico is going to take care of your Mama…" an exaggerated wink, "and you. Looks like you've both had a long drive." Nico gestured with her shoulder toward the very comfy couch tucked into the window corner next to the counter "Sit on the cozy couch, Dia's Mama, and Nico will bring Dia over."

Maki dropped the diaper bag first, then herself, arms stretched out.

"You can stretch out those extra long legs too, put up your feet. Nico doesn't mind. It's not her cafe."

"You're not the owner?"

Somehow, Nico seemed more like a proprietor and less like a barista. Maybe some kind of artist with a part time job. Maki knew many people had extra jobs, especially during the holidays.

Nico giggled. "Owners are my best and oldest friends. Giving them a holiday shopping date night for a Christmas gift."

"That's nice."

"Nico is the nicest. It's practically in my name."

Maki laughed; Nico nodded as if she'd just scored a victory.

Dia had quieted down so Maki had scored a victory as well her daughter suddenly easy to hold and social, glancing around everywhere, pointing. Maybe Dia didn't need a change yet. A bottle of juice. Or some cereal. Cereal was easy to make.

"If she's hungry and you've got a bottle or something quick in there, Nico can heat it up for you."

"Cereal. There's cereal and a bowl in the outside pocket."

Nico nodded, then unzipped the bag to find the box, and took it into the back with her, leaving Maki to appreciate all the details of the cafe. Snowflakes seemed to be the base decoration of choice for the town. The biggest Christmas tree had multicolored lights, golden garland, and Nutcracker themed ornaments. Every movement of the ballet was represented as far as Maki could tell. Maki wondered if some of them were made from marzipan.

Nico was back in a twinkling, handing Maki a bowl of cereal, "Now what would Dia's mama like?"

"Any kind of sandwich."

DIa could smell the food, leaning forward with interest.

"Nico can manage."

"And something with about a quart of espresso."

Nico's lips pursed, as if that was a choice she didn't agree with. But she also didn't know Maki well enough to make an alternate suggestion. So a question instead.

"Do you like sweet or savory?"

"Savory."

"How do you take your coffee?"

Maki glanced up from concentrating on Dia, to catch Nico watching her seriously.

Maki smirked, "French, no cigarette, mademoiselle."

Now Maki was speaking French and making bad jokes. Oh, she was so very tired. Maybe it was time for her to deflect with a question.

"Are you actually a Christmas elf?"

"Because you've been good?" Nico sounded judgey.

"No...no." Maki was flushed and flustered, "the hat, the height…"

Nico snorted.

Maki spoke faster, "The snow… the town…the decorations…it's practically a Santa town, a Hallmark….

Nico gave up and flopped behind Dia, laughing, "Slow down, student driver. Nico will give you the basics. Nico Yazawa, not elf, frequently found in a kitchen, definitely not married so good call on the madmoiselle, queer as…" Nico's eyes flashed to Dia and she didn't finish the phrase, "And if none of that sounds familiar, the rest is a long story."

"Okay."

"Nico will be back with more food in a few, ladies." Nico, red eyes as warm as a well banked fire, caught Maki's full attention, "Do not go anywhere."

Maki nodded, continuing to feed Dia spoonfuls, "Guess we're both getting a snack."

Dia smiled.

###

Santa was probably watching. Now Maki could hear the quiet jazz playing in the background, the Christmas jazz, hints of different carols, competent pianists offering smooth, easy, restful takes on slowing holiday hustle. As Dia relaxed and ate, Maki relaxed into the moment, glad not to be speeding solo through the cold night anymore. Warm and cozy. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt like this, comfortable, warm, cozy, just quietly in the moment during her favorite time of the year. Even the days she'd spent this year with Rin, Hanayo, and their daughter, Tora, had been more about watching as their children learned and played together, growing, worrying about what might happen or complain about work and family inconveniences. When had Maki and Dia been alone? Not often, especially with the nanny there. Yes, for bedtime stories and sleep times, but there wasn't much sharing on Dia's part, not yet.

"We're staying home next year, Dia. If anyone wants a visit, they can come to us." Sound decision.

A small noise. Dia seemingly approved.

"And I want to start spending more time playing my favorite pieces or recording the lullabies I compose for you as an album, not just rehearsing for the next concert."

Maybe there shouldn't be a next concert for awhile. Now that performances were possible again, even in the presence of Covid, Maki wasn't sure they were practical. It was still dangerous, especially for Dia. And Maki hadn't not taken nearly enough – or any– maternity leave. Every week since July had involved travel. Their house currently served mostly as long term storage for her favorite piano and certain family heirlooms.

"Here we go. I can take over feeding Dia if you want." Nico the maybe elf (whatever she claimed otherwise) put a plate in front of Maki. " It's grilled cheese and tomato."

"Tomatoes are my favorite."

"Good guess for Nico then." Nico turned Dia, took the bowl and spoon. "Enjoy."

Maki bit into the molten gold toasted brioche bread, at least three cheeses merging on her tongue with a slight peppery bite, along with the tomato and basil. "Salad caprese…"

"Good catch. Nico slipped a couple of other bonuses in there, but you'll figure them out."

Nope. No detective work. Just savoring deliciousness in big, messy bites. Maki was salivating with butter running down her chin, but she didn't care at all.

"I'm just going to enjoy this. It's amazing."

"Nico will remain a magician then." A quick wave of her hand, then Nico's attention was back on Dia, "Are you going to like Nico's cooking as much as your Mama?"

"She's not a big tomato fan yet."

"Oh." Nico tweaked Dia's nose to a giggle, whispering, "Your mama's gonna brainwash you if you don't watch out.

"'S not brainwashing." Maki mumbled mid chew, very self conscious about her most frequent dinner choice, "Pizza is THE perfect meal, all the food groups and Dia can handle small pieces herself."

Dia picked out the one word she'd probably heard all her life, "Pizza!"

"Like mother, like daughter."

Nico fed Dia another spoonful, "Tis isn't pizza but Nico bets its tasty."

Dia leaned forward. She hadn't been hungry earlier, but time in the car always brought her appetitie out.

"She's a neat eater."

"She's a neat everything. Always keeps her toys in the same area."

"like mother, like…"

Maki shook her head, "I make piles. I know what's where but it's not the neatest."

"Nico is on the move too much. Everythinggoes in suitcases."

"A nomad?"

Nico stared at Maki, who blinked, waiting patiently for an answer. After a minute, Nico smiled and shrugged, "Touring for work."

"Me too." Maki sounded eager. This might be someone who understood.

"Consultant? Eli says a lot of them drive through here on the way to…"

"Musician." Maki snapped.

"Oh." Nico chuckled, "How's your coffee?"

"What's funny? And…" Maki inverted the cup, "empty."

"NIco will fix that. And Nico is a musician too. Guess we don't recognize each other in the wild."

"Are you in a ensemble? What instrument do you play?"

Nico raised an eyebrow. "Nico sings. With a backing band."

"Oh."

"And you?"

"Piano." Maki flexed her fingers. "Driving is not the best for me but I prefer the solitude." Maki glanced at her duaghter, :ANd Dia mostly likes' hand skating up, "the VROOM!"

"Must be cute, this vrooming. Nico's mostly on tour buses. Not driving. Things really only started up again this year after the lockdown."

"Yeah."

A weight in the air. share acknowledgement of a whole way of life thrown sideways, professions suddenly precarious, careers lost, the need to nuture precious, returning audiences.

"We've been on the road every week since July."

"Nico did March to June, then August and college tours. July's too hot."

"It is." Maki glanced out the window, still a gentle snowfall, "It's magical now, the places the weather matches the calendar."

"Santa buffs the chance of snow." Nico joked.

"He does." Maki's agreement was surprisingly serious.

Nico checked Dia's expression. As serious as her mother's. Santa stans then.

"How was your sandwich? Do you need another?"

A gorgeous, glowing smile, "It was the best. Seriously. And I'm fine." A pause, "Your friends have a nice place here."

"They do. Eli comes from a restaurant family. You'll want to try her breakfast blintzes someday. Nozomi makes film shorts. Although Nico had to fire her from music videos….she just…" Nico shuddered.

Maki suddenly wondered exactly what these friends of Nico's were like. Dia pulled on Maki's arm.

"Okay, bun. C'mere. Mama's got you."

Maki took Dia from Nico, shifting so Dia was sitting on her lap. Nico watched, enthralled.

"Bun?"

"Short for bunny, I guess. Dia laughs when I do this." Maki put her hands up in bunny ears, Dia giggling and copying the gesture.

Movement outside the window. Two people on the walkway.

"Time for Nico to work again. But I'll be back."

"Sure."

For all Maki's lauding solitude and the vroom of the car, she was in no rush to leave this place. Talking with Nico had a comfortable flow and Dia was more at ease than usual, considering the newness of the environment. It was probably past time to update her parents.

M: Stopped for food and coffee.

Parents: How's Dia?

It was always about Dia. The next generation of Nishikinos. Maybe the next doctor. Maki had vetoed any medically related toys but that hadn't stopped her parents' propaganda push.

M: Fine, Getting sleepy.

Maki should have brought the car seat inside.

Parents: Roads are bad here. Icy, busy. You should check into a hotel. Where are you?

Maybe Nico would let Maki take a long nap, stretched out on this comfy, coffeeshop couch. Were there blinds? Or curtains that could be closed? The caffeine in the air hit a suddenly buzzing Maki. Not an ideal sleeping environment.

Dia was sleepy. And restless. Maki laid her supine on the couch. Dia clapped her hands in the air, to a tune only she heard. Maki started sneaking her hand in between Dia's to see if she could catch it. Maki was winning 15-9 when she glanced up to see Nico leaning on the counter, watching them, a soft smile on her lips.

"You two are the cutest. you know. Nico is counting meeting you as a Present from Santa."

Dia burbled.

"Dia approves."

"Thank you, Dia. Now what can Nico do for Maki?"

"Point me to a hotel."

"Stay here, Nico Nico Ni." Nico shot her shot. Maki was impressed. Could Nico read minds?

"what… I couldn't…the windows…" Maki gestured at the glass.

"Not the coffeeshop, silly. Eli and Nozomi have an apartment upstairs for long days and visitors. Studio but Nico will sleep on the couch."

That sounded too good to be true, "That'd be…" Dia rolled over, reminding Maki of responsibilities. "We need a crib."

"Oh yeah, silly Nico." Self deprecating head chuck.

"Sorry." A shy smile, "Thank you for the offer. Maybe we can…"

Nico bounced to stand next to Maki, looking down, phone out, "Oh, Nico is not done meeting you yet. We'll get you a room somewhere. Nico helps with your luggage. You give Nico your number. Nico sings a lullaby for the prettiest girls she's ever met. You sleep. Nico sleeps upstairs. You come back and Nico cooks you breakfast."

Maki blushed, glancing away, fingers reaching for a curl, not the phone.

"Too much?"

A nod.

Nico dropped her phone onto the couch arm, knelt, and reached a finger out for Dia to grab, "Dia, tell your Mama that Nico is one of Santa's elves and good girls don't turn down help from Santa."

Nico winked at Maki.

"I wouldn't want to upset Santa."

"No one does."

"There's a lot going on…" Maki fidgeted, "holidays, family."

Nico pulled Dia's hand back toward herself, "Nico gets that."

"Dia needs to sleep soon."

"And Nico needs to close up." Nico's energy stilled.

Maki hadn't known Nico long but Nico not smiling seemed as wrong as a hot January or cold July.

"if your tour…or my tour…takes us…we could have dinner…when I have a babysitter."

Nico perked up. Maki thought she might swoop down and kiss Dia's cheek or grab Maki's hand and squeeze it. Instead Nico just bounced to her feet.

"Are you on your way to Boston? Nico has a New Year's Eve concert there, if you're still in town?"

Irresponsible Maki hadn't started planning anything for 2024. Current Maki thanked her.

"I will be."

Nico leaned over to push her phone Maki-ward in the most comedic way possible. "Give Nico your deets."

"Sure."

"And I'll get you backstage passes."

"Okay."

"It's a date." Nico took her phone back, hugging it to her chest. Maki couldn't help but grin at the exaggerated gesture.

The door chime jingled like sleigh bells on snow as new customers entered in a blast of waking chill and casual conversation. Nico had time for one more killer cozy by the firelight smile.

"Nico will be looking forward to it."

Dia was bumping against Maki, who scooped her up, suddenly too invigorated to tuck either of them into bed. "Time to hit the road, my girl. Let's see how far we can go."

A/N:

Currently hooked on the ambient (Christmas) jazz channels on YouTube.

Just a short holiday themed excursion to reclaim my Santa's helper status, after years of not quite managing.

Take care, be safe, keep pushing for peace. Love you.