the night of the second goodbye
"Lanie? What are you doing here?" Kate asks when she unexpectedly sees her friend entering the precinct tech room.
"Me? Girl, I should ask you the same thing," Lanie responds with a hand in her hip. "I thought you were working from home."
"I am," Kate insists. "But I wanted to drop this off so Ryan and Espo have it for their court case preparation." She holds up a file folder that she'd finished the paperwork processing for an hour before.
"And you didn't want to just fax it over?" Lanie asks.
"I might...be a little...bored..." Kate admits. "Being home alone wasn't originally part of the plan."
"Oh, girl, I get it. How long until you're able to visit your little girl in person?" Lanie's sass switches to empathy on a dime.
"A few more weeks," Kate sighs. "It's killing me not being able to be there with her, but I gotta do what's best for this one." She places her hand on her stomach and gives it a gentle rub. Even as she entered the early days of her second trimester, it wasn't obvious to anyone but herself and Rick that Kate was pregnant, but as a doctor, Lanie recognized the fullness in Kate's cheeks and chest for the baby weight they were.
"Thirteen weeks, right?" Lanie estimates.
"Yeah, just about," Kate smiles. "Finally starting to feel like myself again."
"You're doing all the right things, mama," her friend assures her. "What else do you have planned for today?"
Kate shrugs, "I think I'm going to stop for some ice cream on my walk back home, FaceTime with Ruby, maybe watch a movie."
"That sounds like the life," Lanie chuckles.
"It is mind numbing," Kate rolls her eyes. "Are you here for a case?" She realized she actually had no clue why Lanie was really there.
Lanie nods,"that one, actually." She points at the folder in Kate's hand. "I'm the expert witness."
"Of course," Kate laughs. "Wanna hand this over for me, then?" She gives her the folder when she realizes Javi and Ryan weren't at the precinct.
"They're out interviewing a witness," Lanie explains. "But Javi said they should be back in less than 10 minutes. Why don't you stay and spend the afternoon with us?"
"I really shouldn't," Kate says. She was hesitant even making the walk there in the first place, not wanting to cause any confusion around her family medical leave and the current hierarchy of command at the 12th. Kate was basically Captain in name only, at this point, handing most day-to-day responsibilities over to Javi and Ryan. She was just so bored at home that the few miles to the precinct were a refreshing mental health necessity. The wonderfully mild early-May weather only called her to the sidewalks even louder. Plus, then she had a different excuse to get ice cream. Not that she needed an excuse, but "it's for the baby", was less convincing each time she and Rick walked to the shop on the corner.
"Well, at least stay to say hi to the boys?" Lanie suggests. "I know they'd be bummed to hear you stopped by and didn't see them."
"Okay, you're right," Kate smiles.
Lanie follows her into the media room next to Kate's office with a grin on her face, "I know."
Kate rotates her ice cream cone as she licks around the edges to keep it from melting down her hand, frantically trying to multitask as the elevator drops her off on the top floor and she has to fish her key from her pocket. Still focused on not letting any ice cream go to waste, she craftily opens the door with her elbow and walks into the empty loft. Or so she thought.
"Hey, honey," Castle says as he emerges from the bedroom in his robe with wet hair.
"Oh my god!" Kate jumps. "Castle!" Once her heart rate returns to normal, she gathers herself and asks what he's doing there.
"I do live here," Castle shrugs. "I was gonna see if you wanted to get ice cream with me but it looks like you already went without me."
"Well, I didn't know you were gonna be here," Kate defends herself. "Otherwise I would've. Why are you here now though?"
"Ah, Ruby was having a sleepy day so I decided to let her get some rest. Mother and Alexis are stopping in with some dinner for her later, so I thought it might be nice to spend some time with my wife, for once," Castle explains, getting closer to Kate with each breath.
"You know, if you really want ice cream, we can just wait until after dinner and it'll be like I never even had one today," Kate says as she masterfully finishes off the last bite of her waffle cone, not a drop of her rocky road ice cream ending up on her hands or the floor even as it started to melt.
"We can get ice cream later," Rick agrees. "But there's something else I'd really like to do with you right now." He pulls her in for a kiss, the taste of chocolate and almond still on her lips.
"I really like kissing you, Richard Castle," Kate whispers after they momentarily separate. "You're a really good kisser."
"Just a good kisser?" Castle teasingly raises his brow.
"A really good kisser," Kate corrects him. "And don't worry, Big Rick, you're really good at other things, too." She chuckles, "I just don't think I've told you how much I like kissing you in a while."
"Oh, Kate Castle, I could kiss you for hours. I could kiss you in a car, I could kiss you in a bar, I could kiss you in a j–"
"Okay, Dr. Suess," Kate rolls her eyes. She kisses him again, her hands wandering from his face down to his chest.
"Oh! I just remembered something!" Rick exclaims, pulling away from his wife momentarily. "I have something to show you." Castle heads toward the staircase without looking back.
"Uh..."
"Kate, c'mon," he beckons, holding out his hand. "It's upstairs. Alexis's room." Kate shakes her head but grabs on to her husband hand and follows him up the steps.
He opens the door to Alexis's bedroom, which was mostly an office space with a bed in it for the nights his oldest daughter needed a place to crash. In her closet hung old high school dresses and memorabilia, plus a few boxes of precious keepsakes. Next the boxes was a canvas bag that Kate had never noticed before.
"So, I was talking to Ruby earlier this week about the baby and the nursery and stuff like that and I know, I know we decided we weren't going to buy much until later in the pregnancy so we don't have things piling up for months, but I, uh, I already had this stuff, so technically I didn't break any rules," Rick prefaces as he grabs the bag.
"That's encouraging," Kate laughs.
"So when Jenny was pregnant with Nicky and we were...on our...you know...I did some baby shower shopping on my own and well, I ended up gifting them a basket that Mother and Alexis put together for me," Rick explains. "So, I returned most of the stuff I bought, but there were a few things I just couldn't let go of and part of the reason for that is because I imagined our own kid with this stuff some day."
"Oh, babe, that's...that's really sweet," Kate says, feels herself inching toward tears but she pushes them away before they can fall.
"Some of it's a little silly, but, I mean, what do you expect from me?" Castle poses rhetorically. "So, uh, here."
Rick holds out the bag and Kate grabs it, taking a seat in the office chair while Castle sits down on the professionally made bed.
"Castle!" Kate exclaims when she pulls out the first item. A custom-made Kevlar vest with "BABY" printed across the back.
"Not appropriate, I know. Trust me, the red heads gave me plenty of grief about that one."
"No, I love it," Kate laughs. "I can't believe you were going to give this away!"
"Right!?" Castle agrees. "It's like a perfect matching set."
"I know they won't be here in time this year, but if this is adjustable, we could totally have some awesome family Halloween costumes next year. Get one for Ruby and Alexis, too? That would be amazing," Kate muses.
"You really are the perfect woman, you know that?" Castle says with stars in his eyes.
"Yeah, I know," Kate laughs. "What else is in here?"
She pulls out a few wall decorations and a lion stuffed animal.
"I just really liked those and I didn't know if they'd still have them in a few years. And the lion reminds me of Linus," Rick explains. "And then there are a few outfits in there that reminded me of you."
Kate holds up the first set and reads the shirt. "The Mets won the World Series and 9 months later I was born. Really, babe?"
"Why would they even have that shirt?" Rick cracks up. "I wonder if they printed way too many in 2015 and now they just have them out for people to buy them for the laughs."
"Yeah, you think you're so funny, don't you?" Kate feigns anger as she tries not to laugh herself.
"Honey, do you even remember the last time the Mets won the World Series?" Rick jokes.
"Of course I do!" Kate gasps. "I was almost 7 and I begged my dad to take me to Shea for Game 7 because I had off of school the next day. It got rained out and rescheduled for Monday night instead, so I couldn't go. But even though it was a school night, my mom let me stay up way past my bedtime to see the final out. Dad took me to the parade they had the next weekend."
"Wow, you do really love baseball, don't you?" Castle smiles, not having heard that story before.
"Uh huh, and I'll make a concert out of you yet, Mr. Castle."
"I like baseball," Castle defends. "That shirt is really funny though, right?"
"Oh, it's hilarious," Kate agrees.
"Okay, there's one more," Castle gestures to the bag.
This onesie didn't have a cheeky saying or innuendo, just a simple cartoon that nearly took Kate's breath away. It was powder blue with a dark grey elephant holding its tail in the middle. "Oh, Castle, I love it."
"I'm glad," Rick says with a beaming smile. "Also, I know it's still early, but I was wondering what you thought about maybe converting my office into the nursery? It's just so much closer than having them up here."
"You'd give up the bat cave?" Kate asks.
"I can write anywhere," Rick shrugs.
"Well, I think logistically that makes the most sense," Kate agrees. "And that way there's a better chance that the baby won't wake up Ruby as much."
"Yeah, I thought that, too."
"Okay, well, if you're okay with that, then that would be great," Kate smiles excitedly. "But still no buying a bunch of stuff until we have the space!"
"Yes, dear," Rick mopes. He glances down at his watch and says, "wow, it's almost time for dinner already. What can I make for us tonight?"
"Hmm, do we have everything we need for Chicken Parmigiana? I smelled some on my walk earlier and I just can't stop thinking about it," Kate chuckles.
"I will see what I can do," Rick smiles. "Want me to draw you a bath before we eat?"
"That does sound really nice," Kate says. "But I think I just want to lay down in bed for a bit. Wake me up when dinner's ready?"
"Deal."
tw: blood
"Kate", she hears Rick's voice whisper. "Kate. Honey, dinner's almost ready."
She opens her heavy eyelids when she realizes that she actually fell asleep. "Oh, hey, okay," she yawns. "I'll..." Oh, that's not right. Her hand reflexively grabs at the cramp in her lower abdomen. "I'll be right there."
Castle notices Kate's body language and frowns. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," Kate fake smiles. But then she feels it again. Not fine.
She feels a bit dizzy as she gets to her feet, but another painful twinge pulls her toward the bathroom. It wasn't nausea, exactly, but she definitely felt like she might be sick. The pain is constant now, radiating through her back and pelvic muscles. A heat builds between her thighs as the pain intensifies, so Kate decides that maybe she should sit on the toilet to see if it would pass, but as she looks down at her legs, all she sees is a stream of deep red blood.
"Rick!" She yells frantically. "Rick!" Before she even finishes calling him the second time, Castle is there in the doorway of the bathroom.
"Oh, god," he gulps.
Kate feels the hot tears on her cheeks as she says, "something is wrong."
a/n: so, uh, happy new year, i guess? see you all in 2024!
