3

"I see a problem".

Connor spoke then turned to face the 'committee' as they all regarded the massive Christmas Tree still sitting in the middle of the Town Square. This is where they wanted to put the fireworks, and to do that they needed to truck in a shit-ton of sand. Ianot had bene most clear on that… a truckload of sand to make like… a sand pit they could play in. Fireworks can not set fire to sand. But. But there was a tree there.

"Yeah… there's a massive fucking tree there" Owen snorted, Mountain slapping him on the shoulder in agreement and then grabbing for him as Owen shot forward from the force of the blow. Then came a soft hug of apology. They forget how slight he is, think of him as one of them these days but Owen doesn't mind.

"No… the problem is… where do we put this thing? I mean… the town dump already as too much green waste in it, the snow is so deep that dragging the damned thing will be…. What. I know that face." Connor frowned at Jack.

"Well… we could chuck it over there where the playground is buried already" they all turned to stare in that direction.

"But the snow is still so deep, we might accidentally burry one of the toadstool seats or something" Jack argued.

"Well… shit." Owen huffed, then pointed "That field over there. Why is that not covered in snow?"

"I plough it in case a chopper needs to land for an emergency" Jack replied like it made all the sense in the world.

"Well, with your family history… that makes sense I guess" Owen muttered then grinned as Jack poked his tongue at him. Owen then blinked slowly before saying softly "You have a snow plough."

"Of course I do, how do you think I keep the roads clear dickhead?"

"Yeah, dork breath" Babbit agreed, then frowned "hang on, did you just ay something deragetory to Uncle Owie?"

"Derange… Babbit, that…. Is not a word."

"Yes it is. Taddy sez Mister Hargate is derangetory all the time."

"Deranged. The man is deranged" Jack said and then blinked, turning to grin at said Mister Hargate who was waiting to help at the grass verge.

"That's alright Jack, I did forget we agreed to the route around the treeline for my morning constitutional and he was watching when I did my naked run the other morning. So invigorating for the skin" the old man said making several people cringe internally as the old man's 'naturalist' views were well known. Something Ianot did not disagree with, his own Neekid Days known.

"So… What the hell was I saying?" came an angry demand from the little boy, flicking his golden curls over a shoulder as his long hair bobbed in the sunlight.

"You were mixing deranged and derogatory I think" Owen frowned, then added "But you do have a point. That rude remark was below the belt."

"Yeah… almost knee level I reckon" Babbit agreed with a narrowing of his eyes.

"Look… if you can plough the old sports field, now that we have a new one it is just a stock paddock these days… we can make a bonfire with this thing and a few other bits and pieces, have a countdown and everything… an evening of music and partying?" Connor pointed to an empty space where pat of the village fete usually got set up.

"OK… let's do it" Jack gushed as he went to get the fire truck with the apple picker to help lower the tree. By the time it occurred to him that he had given permission for the tree to come down it was already slipping, the ropes holding it being slashed by John with what looked like a fucking Katana he had retrieved out of his car.

Yes… the car in the path of the sooo painfully slloooooowwwwwwwwllllyyyyy falling tree.

Jack facepalmed as John finally realized and ran for his car, the tree slowly… almost gracefully lowering to the ground like it was in a slow motion movie sequence, John in his car racing backwards so the tree limbs barely brushed the bonnet.

With a nervous laugh he held his arm up to show he was safe.

Babbit turned to Jack "Why does he get all the good jobs?"

Jack was too busy trying to calm his beating heart to answer.

Ianto does not need to know.

Right?