"Eat it."
"No."
"That is an order."
"I don't take orders from you."
"I am ordering you to eat it now."
"No."
They bicker back and forth, Either side steadfast in their stance as Emiya Alter wonders why he's brought into this.
A date in a diner of all things.
When the Black Saber before him "asked" him to go out with her initially, he refused, but as per her Pendragon blood, she wasn't taking no for an answer.
And so, here he was, bickering with a girl no taller than his chest over a small piece of strawberry stabbed on a fork.
Some time he's having here in this establishment.
"I already told you no. Quit being stubborn."
"I am not relenting until you eat something good aside from the gruel you always have."
"And that-" He points to the tower of pancakes stacked beyond its normal size. "Is what you call good?"
"Yes."
"You wouldn't know good food even if it hits you in the face."
"And you would not know what is good if you never had one in the first place. Besides that, it is just a strawberry."
She's certainly a handful. If she keeps insisting this way, he has no choice but to give in the towel.
He let out a sigh. "Fine."
She gives a smug smile in response. "Good."
He opens his lips and bites the fruit off the fork.
He chews and swallows. No reaction anywhere on his visage, not even the slightest.
As expected, no taste. What's the point of having food like this if he's never going to taste anything in the first place.
Even then, it doesn't even matter. The "gruel" that she talked about is enough for him to operate on a day-by-day basis. No need for any sort of lavish thing on his plate.
"Not even a twitch… so it is true."
Her pale gold eyes focused on him. The sudden intensity rather surprises him.
"What is?"
"Your taste. You do not feel anything on your tongue, can you not?"
"No, I can't."
"Is that not saddening for you, to have lost one of your senses?"
"Frankly, no."
"Not even for a little?"
"Not even."
And it's the fact. Why bother having a sense of taste when the things you eat often aren't fulfilling as one hopes, instead being regulated to the types that many others describe as "bland" that have more nutrients put into them.
Efficiency is what he always stands by, always believed in when he took on this wretched path. Ironic how that same path even took away the one thing that wasn't of use to him, like discarding pieces that were not beneficial whatsoever.
Same… with his memories. Similar to that time, to that fire.
"That… is rather unfortunate. Do you truly not miss it?"
"Never did. Always thought it was a necessary sacrifice when…"
He glances at the cuffs on his wrists, the constant reminder of what he's done.
"...When I took this path."
"...of becoming a hero of justice, am I correct?"
A piercing pulse strikes through his being when he hears those words. How much he tries to forget, forced to forget, he never seems to escape from the very thing that caused him to become like this.
Like a looming noose tying around his neck.
"Don't even mention that to me."
"Why?"
"Because that's a curse I never want to hear again."
"And so? You cannot run away from it forever. I have heard of what happened to you in that pursuit. You have to accept that no matter where you go, you will always be reminded of it. The only choice you can make is to embrace it, or run. The latter you are and already have been doing."
"Even if there's blood on my hands-"
"Even if there was death that was carried by your hands, you still have the ability to reflect upon it."
"How would you even know-"
"Because I am the same as you, a tyrant who did what was necessary to protect her people, staining her hands with blood for a kingdom that was never supposed to live. Despite the impossibility, despite how minimal the chances are, I still pushed on. And you yourself did what was necessary for your ideal. You killed a few for the dozens, eliminating your loved ones for the sake of the world, the 'kingdom' which is your dream of becoming a hero of justice, and pushed on despite the impossibility of it all, despite the suffering you went through. Your loss of taste is just a portion of the larger price you paid during that journey."
Her eyes steadfast, a swirling flame within them, not budging in their resolve as she glares into his eyes.
This girl… Who would've thought she would become this worked up for him of all people. That she cares this deeply surprises him to the point where if this is truly the Black Saber that he knew prior before.
Somehow, it is… nostalgic. An afterimage of a similar figure fading in with her, green eyes and golden hair…
Hah… even then, even if he would ever try to embrace himself, forgive himself for what he's done, it's an impossibility.
Even if those memories are faint, forgotten, their lingering remains are still felt through the broken fragments of his mind, of his soul.
"...Heh. Who knew that there's this side to you."
He conjures a smile that never reaches his eyes as he turns his gaze away from her. The ocean beyond the horizon clashing against the sands, dissolving and retracting back into the deep sea.
"...If I can't accept myself like you said, what then?"
A laugh to his side as he turns back to her, a smile on her lips while she looks upon his gaze, the flame now combined with a semblance of softness that resides in her eyes.
"Then, I will just have to bother you and help you, no matter your objections."
A statement said in complete confidence. Now that's the Alter he's familiar with. Even so, it was nice to see her act beyond her subdued self, despite it being for him.
"Even if I tried to run?"
She nods. The slight glint in her eyes tells him more than what he needs to know.
She will never take no for an answer.
"Heh. How bothersome…"
All this because of his lack of taste. Can't say he expected the day to turn out like this.
Some date this was… But at least he's found some long-lasting company in this place called Chaldea.
"Now, say ahh."
He glances back at her and sees her holding a fork close to his face, a full pancake dripping with syrup stabbed into it.
Back to where we started. Great.
"No."
"Come on!"