She knew who it was before she opened the door. A part of her expected him to come. He always did. And she always sent him home.

She wearily moved towards the door. The day had been hellish, and he would be broken. So broken. She would do what she always did. She would put him back together the best she could before sending him back to his wife.

Olivia approached the door, but paused to lean her head against the cool surface. She needed to mentally prepare for the incoming emotional onslaught.

It was always this way. He'd burst in, a hurricane of emotion, and she would soothe him the best she could with her words. She never touched him. God. She knew better than to touch him. He felt like hers in every way, and if she let them be…if she let them be what her heart wished they could be…it would destroy him. It would destroy them. She couldn't live with that.

So she prepared herself before opening the door. She mentally resolved to build him up and let him go. She had to be strong, responsible. It was what was best. For everyone.

With a sigh, she flipped the deadbolt. Her heart pounded in anticipation, and the world felt like it was moving in slow motion as she swung open the door. Send him home. He needs to go home, she reminded herself, but before she opened her mouth, his eyes caught hers. His volatile blue eyes practically begged her to save him, and she was his partner, she wouldn't let him fall.

Without a word, she stepped back, allowing him to enter her dimly lit apartment. His clothing dropped, and she vaguely remembered hearing the sheets of rain pounding

her window. Without thinking she pushed his soaked coat off of his shoulders. It puddled on the floor, neither of them gave it a second thought, and her hands rested on the firm muscle of his biceps. "You're soaked." She didn't recognize the softness in her own voice.

Until now he stood in stoic silence, but his eyes drifted down to his own clothes, as if he hadn't noticed their water soaked state. "Sorry," he took a step back and her hands dropped back to her sides. "Damn. I'm making a mess."

"It's fine," she said, reaching for his coat. She dropped it on a nearby hook and waited for him to step out of his shoes and follow.

Once in the kitchen, she busied herself looking for something for her hands to do. The air felt heavy, like a storm was coming.

"Tea?" She asked without meeting his eyes. She could feel him watching her, and if it were anyone else it would be unnerving, but it was him, and he would never hurt her.

"Sure," his voice remained low.

She started the kettle, then remembered his dripping clothes. "Oh god El." She stepped towards him. "Let me grab something for you. You have to be freezing." She chanced a look in his direction, and sure enough his lips were shifting from pink to blue. Her eyes lingered at his lips. For a moment she wondered what it would be like to kiss him, but she pushed the thought away as soon as it entered her mind. He's not mine, she reminded herself.

She hurried to the laundry closet, and pulled a pair of NYPD sweatpants from the dryer. They were his of course. She snagged them from his gym bag one day after leaving a messy crime scene, and never returned them. She dug around in the dryer, hoping for some sort of oversized shirt or something, and eventually her fingers grasped the hood of their shared gray hoodie.

With both items in hand she turned, and nearly knocked herself over. She hadn't noticed him following. "Liv," he started.

She took a step back. Her heart pounded uncomfortably whenever she stood too close. She lifted her eyes to his face, noting the haunted look there. Everything inside of her wanted to pull him into her arms, and chase away the demons lurking in his soul. But she couldn't. It wasn't her place.

He opened his mouth again, but he hesitated. He decided to forgo whatever he planned to say, and simply thanked her for the clothes before stepping into her bathroom.

She wandered back to the kitchen, and her hands gripped the chilled granite counter. Get a grip. She reminded herself. She knew her role. Patch him up and send him back.

The sound of the bathroom door clicking open brought her head up from its sagging state. She had a clear view of him down the hall. She watched him pull the remaining clothes from the dryer, and put his clothes in. There weren't a lot of clothes in the pile so she watched as he quietly folded the few shirts, and matched the pairs of socks.

What are we doing here? She wondered. They had barely spoken two words to each other, and now he was folding her laundry, and it felt weird and domestic, and she wasn't sure how she felt about that.

Once he finished folding, he left the pile neatly on the top of the washer. He didn't turn around immediately, but when he did she found a weird sort of finality in his eyes. The storm was brewing. She braced herself for impact.

She stepped away from the counter. The kettle began to whistle and she removed it from the burner. The soft padding of his feet against the tile floor alerted her to his approach, but she didn't turn. She mindlessly dug theough the cabinet looking for any tea bag, but she froze when she felt the warmth of his body close behind hers.

"I'm," his voice sent a warm sort of shudder down her spine that she hoped he couldn't see. She suddenly couldn't breathe. "I'm leaving."

She spun around, forgetting his proximity, and she found herself nearly nose to nose with her partner. "What?" She wanted to sound outraged, but the word came out it a breathless puff.

"I can't stay. I…" he shook his head. "I can't do another IAB review. They're going to crucify me." Her brain was screaming. This couldn't be happening. This wasn't happening.

She cursed the tears beginning to form in her eyes. He was leaving her. He didn't come here for her help, he came here for her blessing in abandoning her. She'd be damned if she gave him that. "So you're going to fold." She scoffed, "I can't believe you." She pushed herself away from him and stormed towards her living room. She couldn't breathe. He was leaving.

He followed her, remaining only a step behind. Before she could do anything he reached for her arm and spun her back towards him. She wanted to scream, but the look in his eye gave her pause. It was an apprehension she'd never seen on the face of Elliot Stabler.

"Wait. I…" she sensed his hesitation, and allowed him a minute to collect his thoughts. "I can't leave without saying something."

"Then don't say it." She hated herself for begging. "If you don't say it then you can't leave."

His hand slid down her forearm until he clasped her hand. "I have to say this, Liv. Please let me say this."

She closed her eyes in a tremor to keep her tears under control but they leaked from her eyes anyway. He tugged on her hand and she stepped in closer. "Just say it," she said softly.

She noted his pause, but kept her eyes closed. She could watch him tell her goodbye. To her surprise his free hand reached for her hip, and the other tilted her chin up. "Liv, look at me. I need to see your eyes when I say this. Please."

She nodded before blinking her eyes open. Her breath caught when his hand moved from her chin to her cheek. His thumb brushed away the steady stream of tears. "I need you to know," he gathered courage, and his blue eyes held hers with mesmerizing intensity. "I…I care about you. I, why is this so hard, I love you. I need you to know that."

He watched her as she stood in stunned silence.

"I needed you to know. Before I left." The mention of his leaving tightened the vice on her heart.

"Don't go." She tried pleading again.

He leaned his forehead down until it touched hers. "I can't stay."

She bit her lip, terrified over what she was going to do next. "Stay for me," her voice shook before she closed the distance between them, pressing her lips against his.

Almost immediately one of his hands wove into her hair while the other slid to her lower back, pushing her closer. She wrapped her arms around his neck before sliding her tongue along his bottom lip. She knew what she was doing was wrong, but she didn't care. He wasn't leaving without her knowing what he tasted like.

Tongues tangled as he stepped her towards the couch. Her legs hit the edge and she used the momentum of her fall to pull him down with her. She pulled his bottom lip between her teeth, and felt exhilarated by the groan her actions elicited.

Without much preamble, his hands were on her body, and she wanted more. She pulled his hips roughly into hers causing his lips to break free. "Liv," his voice was all gravel and want. She felt the same want burning in her bones.

"I want you," she breathed. "Don't leave."

Her words caused his hands to slow, and his body lifted from hers to see her face. "Liv." His heaving chest brushed hers with every breath. "Don't do this just to…"

She knew what he meant. "You think I would do this to make you stay?" She wanted to be outraged. She really did, but she couldn't muster it.

"I don't…" he dropped his head to her shoulder. "I don't want you to have any regrets." He lifted his face to better view her eyes. "This… this isn't a one night thing for me."

She suddenly understood his hesitation. He told her he loved her. Nothing about this would be casual to him. He wanted to know where she stood. He seemed willing to burn his life to the ground, but not in exchange for one night.

"El," her hand cupped his cheek, as her thumb brushed across the rough stubble of his face. "I've wanted this for a long time." She closed her eyes, pushing herself to be brave. After all, this was Elliot. She trusted him, and he would never hurt her. "I love you too."

With that confirmation his hands resumed their exploration while his lips left kisses along her jaw. She gasped when one of his grasped at her breast. A whispered "Okay?" Was answered with an enthusiastic "More."

She felt as if she were in a dream as clothing began to hit the floor. The surreal feeling continued when he dropped her gently in the center of her bed, his hands and mouth learning every dip and curve of her body. Her heart nearly burst when he brought her to the edge, and took himself over with her.

For a moment, the sound of their breathless bodies was the only thing that filled the air. Eventually he rolled onto his side, pulling her body firmly into his. "I love you," he whispered. "I'm not going anywhere."

She responded by tucking herself tighter agaisnt the warmth of his chest, her body relaxed with the sound of his beating heart.

In the stillness of the afterglow she felt a weight lift from her shoulders. A choice had finally been made. She and Elliot had left behind the eternal limbo they had been slaves to. Something inside her knew, they had changed the course of both of their lives.