The first part of this heavily borrows from 1x04, including dialogue and plot! Mentions of death, cancer, 9/11, drug abuse and overdose are heavy here. Though, I did alter the timeline of the episode a bit to match up with the story's canon.
There's a dad on the verge of a nervous breakdown at the scene. TK has seen enough to usually be desensitized to the panic. Given the events of the past 48 hours, his anxiety peeks just a bit. The guy nearly punches Judd for trying to drag him away from the rubble that was once his house. Owen steps in quickly.
"I'm a father. I'd have done the same thing."
TK resists an eye roll as they get to work. The man is describing his kids that are stuck beneath the destruction. Owen manages to keep him calm and focused on what matters as most of the team sets up the sensors while TK is tasked with recovery tools. It doesn't take long for Paul to report that everything's set up. TK consults the tablet before passing it to his dad.
"Everybody quiet!" TK commands. "Nobody move. Nobody breathe!"
The entire site goes silent, barring the few birds that flock overhead. Owen instructs for the distraught father to call out for his kids. TK isn't sure why he flinches with each cry.
"Nico! Ada! Can you hear me?"
Each word is followed by a choked sob. Owen stands beside him, eyes on the tablet. TK shifts, listening out for the kids. The usual air of anxiety overtakes the crew, but there's something new in TK this time.
It's not guilt. Right? No, he has nothing to feel guilty for. It wasn't him that got these kids stuck under this rubble. That's all the curse of mother nature.
With each pained cry from the man that TK just met, the pit in his stomach increases.
The sound is soft and nearly blends in with the breeze at first. Then, it grows louder. A bit of relief splashes over TK.
Owen grins, turning to the man. "Did you hear that?"
"That's Ada. That's my daughter!"
Owen nods, heading back to the truck. "Alright, we have signs of life on the north side! I'm gonna need jaws and all the cribbing we got!"
As Paul, Judd and Marjan tend to the pile of rubble, TK focuses on prepping to go in. He's inspecting the helmet when he hears Paul speak up.
"Hey, Cap. We are this close to a secondary collapse."
TK doesn't bother looking up. They've faced bigger pileups before. There are kids down there. Collapse or not, there's no way he's going to leave them behind.
Owen's voice is soft, several octaves below his "captain" voice. "TK, give me the helmet."
TK's head snaps up. His brows furrow. The professionalism is dropped and yet, he briefly forgets all about their argument a half hour earlier. "What? Why?"
Owen removes his own helmet and sets it down. "I'm gonna go in."
TK blinks. The words just barely register. "No, you're not."
He knows better than to defy his father's orders while on the job. It was the first thing they discussed when he joined up back in New York. When your captain tells you something, you do it. TK can't, won't, get away with back talk. He's stuck by that promise for the past 7 years.
This is the one time he's going to disobey a captain's order. There is no way he's sending his father down there.
TK holds the helmet out of reach. "You're the captain."
Owen continues to reach forward. "Exactly." Before his son can get it completely out of the way, he snatches it into his hands.
TK flares his nostrils and holds back an eye roll as he walks towards the truck. This is the furthest thing from protocol. He was more than ready to go in! His dad's lost so much trust in him that he doesn't think he can handle this?!
As angry as he tries to be, the pit in his stomach worsens.
TK clutches the tablet as he gathers with the distraught father, Judd, Marjan and Paul. He can barely make out his dad as he moves below the rubble. What can't be missed is that deep cough. The same one TK heard far too often back in New York.
"It's just some viral thing I can't kick."
He did kick it. TK's the one that asked for proof there, and lots of it.
Doesn't change that with each deep cough that follows Owen calling out for the missing kids, the larger the pit grows within.
The distraught father is breathing down TK's neck, but he doesn't bother to move away. He does as he was always instructed: keep on a poker face. His eyes do not leave the screen. If anything happens to his dad, he's not going to be the one to miss it.
Owen pauses and for several seconds, all that can be heard is the deep, hacking cough. TK straightens up and tries to stop his shaking leg. He pushes the tablet into Paul's hand.
"I gotta go in, something's wrong."
Judd grabs hold of his arm and pulls him back. TK narrows his eyes. "Hey, hey, hey. It's just dust." The older firefighter isn't fazed by his glare. "Look, he's made it through a lot worse than that."
TK debates ignoring him. After all, the true captain is inside of there. He doesn't have to listen to Judd…
That's not even close to being true. He respects Judd way too much. Even if they're on the same level, he's been at this far longer. Right now, Judd is thinking with his head. TK's heart is in the game right now. He needs to take it out.
He's just your captain. Just your captain. He's not your dad here.
Even though the only reason Owen is beneath all of that is because he's TK's dad. They can pretend like they shut it off all they want, but is that really possible when you have a relationship like theirs?
"TK," Owen's voice breaks through the tablet. "Where am I going here?"
The distraught father speaks up. "Reservoir Dogs poster was in the dining room. The kids are in the bathroom, to the right."
TK speaks into the headset. "Ray says that the kids should be in a room to the southwest."
"Roger," is all he gets in response.
The paramedics arrive behind them, but TK can barely make out what they say to Judd. He's too focused on his dad. Once again, Owen calls out to the kids. This time, a little girl responds. TK can hear the father's strangled sigh of relief. The knot in his own stomach slowly releases.
Once Owen breaks the door down, TK spots the kids. He quickly flashes the tablet to Ray, exhaling a sigh of his own. TK forces himself to hide a smile as he listens to his dad comfort Ada and Nico as they walk through the rubble.
"All our stuff…it's ruined."
"That's the good thing about stuff, you can always make your dad buy you more."
TK is just about to laugh when there's rumbling followed by a scream. The screen on the tablet goes black as dust shoots from the top of the house. Ray cries out. TK's heart races heavily in his chest. The knot returns. Keeping up the poker face, TK clutches the walkie talkie.
"Captain Strand, do you copy?"
Silence. The tablet flashes the "searching for signal" sign. The red circle taunts TK as he struggles to keep his breathing even.
"Captain Strand, do you copy?"
TK can't keep it back anymore. His breathing becomes audible. He blinks several times. No, he is not about to cry. Not right now. Ray is 10 seconds away from flooding this place. One of them has to be strong.
For a moment, TK isn't in Austin. He's sitting in his kindergarten classroom. One minute, they were reading A Very Hungry Caterpillar and laughing over the absurd things the little bug ate. In the next, one of the other kids pointed out the smoke that could be seen from the window. Within minutes, you could hear the various sirens. All ones TK knew by heart. He wondered if one of those trucks were his dad's. Off to save someone.
Within an hour, everyone was sent home. His mom came to get him. She held on too tightly and kissed his face in front of his friends. TK squirmed, embarrassed and not understanding.
She held on tightly to him for the rest of the evening. TK didn't quite understand what was going on. Just that there was a big fire, bigger than he had seen before. He knew his dad was there and that seemed to scare his mom more than usual.
His dad didn't come home that night or the next two. TK stayed up until his tiny body wouldn't let him. He knew people had died, including some of his dad's crew. His dad was still alive, but TK couldn't see him.
19 years later, and he once again can't see him.
TK's finger smashes against the bottom button of the walkie talkie, uttering a word he barely uses when in the field.
"Dad!"
The silence is enough for more tears to come. The only sounds around him are that of Ray crying and TK's own breathing.
The walkie finally speaks up. A familiar voice washes over TK. It takes everything he has for the floodgates to remain shut.
"It's okay, nobody's hurt. Coming out to you!"
TK expels the largest sigh of relief. Marjan, Paul and Ray dash to the rubble. The little girl, Ada, is pulled out first by Marjan. She runs straight into her dad's arms. Paul helps Nico out next. There's an eruption of applause by the small crowd around them. TK keeps his eyes glued to the destruction.
He doesn't move until he makes a taller body out. Dressed in uniform and covered in a thick coating of white dust, Owen finally climbs out. TK dashes past the reunited family.
Owen barely takes his helmet off before TK throws his arms around him, clinging tighter than he has in likely almost 20 years. He rests his head on his shoulder, allowing his breathing to finally regulate. His heart still beats heavily and the knot hasn't subsided. Owen hugs him close as he shakily breathes. TK doesn't care about who can see. He doesn't want to let go of his dad for the next 10 years.
Yet, he finds himself partially releasing his grip so he can look into his eyes. "You scared the crap out of me, you know that?"
Owen coughs, chuckling slightly. "You and me both."
TK can't smile or find any humor in it.
The dad didn't make it.
He spent the entire call focused on his kids that he ignored his own pain. A selfless sacrifice that has now orphaned two children.
This isn't the first death TK has witnessed on the job and he knows it certainly won't be the last. It sits heavy on him for the rest of the shift as they wax the truck and attend to the rest of their end of shift duties. Not so much for the family themselves. Of course he's thinking about those kids and the life they'll lead going forward…
A louder part of him wonders about all the times he could've been in their shoes.
It happened when his mother died. That was enough to nearly break him. Every call after that, he was terrified to be too far from Owen. It took months for him to tell himself that it wouldn't happen twice. His dad beat 9/11, cancer. He wasn't going to leave TK yet.
And today he could've.
Every day they go out on a call, TK is at risk of losing his dad. He thought it'd be better considering they work all the same shifts. It's not like the nights where he'd stay up terrified, wondering if he'd get that call.
It doesn't matter how often they work together or all the time that passes…he's brought back to that scared 5 ½ year old little boy whose dad didn't come home for days.
TK forces himself to stay in an older headspace for the rest of the shift. He managed to get a decent amount of sleep the night before. Not the best by any means, but more than usual, even with the storm. It allows him to push through, even when it comes to the car ride home. His dad is showered and in regular clothing. He didn't have the time do his full hair and skincare routine, but the familiar smells ground TK to the car.
When they walk through the door, Buttercup scampers off to play. TK heads into the kitchen and fills the water dish. His laptop is still on the kitchen table. He flinches at the thought of that night.
"You should get some sleep," Owen says as he walks into the room.
TK shrugs. "I'm not tired." He places the dish down by the empty food bowl. "Did he eat at the station?"
Owen nods. "Did you?"
TK frowns, trying to remember. It only takes a couple of moments for his stomach to give it away. Owen softly chuckles and heads for the fridge.
"I can make something," TK offers. "I mean…a house nearly collapsed on you today."
"I've been in worse scrapes."
TK bites his lip. "Yeah…I know."
Owen looks up, his fingertips just barely brushing the fridge handle. He tilts his head.
"I'm okay. They looked me over just to make sure."
TK nods. "I know."
"Are you sure about that?"
"I just…" TK trails off, drumming his fingertips against his pants. "I didn't really think about how scary it has to be having a kid like me."
Owen smirks. "Parenthood isn't easy, Ty. We're always going to worry. Especially when your kid is prone to getting hurt."
"I didn't mean it like that. I mean…" He sighs. "I get why you looked at the texts."
Owen's face falls. TK glances back at the shut laptop. He can feel the outline of his phone in his pocket.
"I put you through a lot more than you did me today," TK whispers. "Finding me like that. I mean, it was terrifying for me waking up from it. I can't imagine…I mean…I'm sorry."
Owen sighs. "Oh, Monkey."
He walks over and wraps his arms around him. This time, TK can hug as tight as he wants to. There's no emergency in the background, no team waiting for them to regroup. TK is able to cling to his dad's soft gray t-shirt and bury his head in his neck. His dad is here. He's safe. They're in Austin, not New York.
Still, those tears crop up again.
"I was scared," TK whispers. "You didn't respond."
"I know, bubba," Owen coos. "I know." He strokes the back of his neck. "I wanted to talk, the dust didn't let me."
TK lets out a shaky breath. "It was too quiet. I…I didn't know where you were. Again."
"Again?" There's a pause followed by a long sigh. "Oh, Monkey."
Owen cuddles him closer. TK lets out a soft sob against him. Owen gently rubs his back and softly hushes him as they rock back and forth in place.
"I'm sorry," he whispers, kissing the side of his son's head. "That had to be so scary."
TK sniffles, wiping at his eyes. "But I did it to you too." He manages to break away a little. There's a mixture of confusion, sadness and guilt written across his dad's face. "That night when you found me."
Owen brushes some tears from TK's cheeks. "I'm not upset with you about that."
"You should be. It was awful. You had to be…"
"Terrified," Owen interrupts. He clears his throat in an attempt to hide the pain. "It as terrifying. For a few moments, I really thought…well…but that didn't happen."
"But you thought it could," TK insists. "And that wasn't fair."
"You were sick, TK." Owen finishes wiping away the tears. "I know you didn't want me to find you. Still, I thank God every day that I did."
"My point is that I put you through it. And that all came following Alex."
The overdose was so much more than just Alex. It still would've hurt regardless, but it was just the final nail in a long, horrible year. Between Owen's cancer and Gwyn's death, TK found himself regressing more. He wanted to block it all out and did his best to keep distracted. First with work. Then with Alex. Even if things hadn't ended, there would've been something, anything, to drive him to that moment.
It's just unfortunate it had to point back to a guy.
"You're an adult," Owen says. "You can speak to whoever you want. I had no right to go through your texts."
"You were worried."
"Well," Owen tilts his head. "You didn't tell me."
TK bites his lip. "I knew how you'd react. I mean, you worry. It's what you do. And considering I know you're not exactly Alex's biggest fan, it wasn't enough to bother you with."
"Hey." Owen snaps his fingers. "You aren't a bother, Tyler Kennedy. Always. You're not bothering me by telling me any part of your life."
The tips of TK's ears warm. "I didn't want you to think I was taking him back. Because, I'm not. We haven't texted since that night and I don't plan on talking to him again."
"You're not ready to date."
"And even if I was, it wouldn't be him."
TK doesn't miss the shift in his dad's breathing. He sighs.
"Dad, I really don't want to talk about my dating life. The truth is, I won't be ready for a very, very long time. But I do know one thing. I deserve better than some guy who could do that to me."
Owen smiles. "You're damn right."
"I guess it was just comfortable. It really did just start out with him asking how he could get some of that stuff to me. Then, we'd just text randomly here and there. Nothing of importance. And yet, I felt like I had to keep it from you." TK frowns. "I didn't like that."
Owen sighs. "I suppose I proved why you did. Maybe I occasionally have the tendency to overreact." TK raises a brow. Owen rolls his eyes. "Alright, maybe not just occasionally. I know I'm more than just protective. I can be overly so. I care about you, buddy, and I want to keep you safe. It's not because I don't trust you. I do. I know that you're not going to spin out of control just because you text Alex about the weather."
He scrubs his hand against his face.
"I should have talked to you about it first. Asked you what was going on."
TK shrugs. "I might've still gotten annoyed."
"Yes, but at least I would've gone about it the right way. I promise, no more looking through your texts unless it's a true emergency. Meaning, it'd save your life."
TK nods. "Thank you," he whispers. "I know it can't be easy to trust me…"
"I do trust you," Owen interrupts. "This has nothing to do with that, and everything to do with my own crazy worries. Even if you hadn't relapsed, I'd still be nervous about you talking to the guy who broke your heart."
"It still doesn't help that I actually did."
"I was brought back there for a moment," Owen admits. TK tries to duck his head, but his father gently grips his chin. "But I never thought for a second that you were back on it. I swear to you. If I ever did, we'd have a discussion."
"I'm not going back to that place, Dad," TK whispers.
"I know. And I won't repeat my mistakes either. I'm here." Owen makes sure they're looking one another in the eye. "I'm going to be honest with you. I'm going to talk to you first before I panic."
TK nods. "Thanks," he whispers.
Owen drops his grip. "I'm sorry," he says, his voice filled with sincerity.
"It's okay. I'm sorry for flipping out on you like that."
"I'd say you're owed one."
"Don't want to be angry anymore." TK gnaws on his lip. "Just want my daddy."
Owen smiles. He wraps an arm around his son and kisses his cheek.
"I'm right here," he promises.
TK rests his head on his shoulder. "Promise?"
"I promise." Owen kisses the top of his head. "Now I need to get some food in your tummy before you take a nap."
"I'm not tired," TK whines, doing his best not to rub at his eyes.
"We'll see about that. Sit at the island, I'm making you an omelet."
TK sighs, reluctantly pulling away from him. "Nothing green!"
Owen snorts. "What kind of father would I be if I subjected you to the evils of spinach."