Chapter 37: Off the Cuff… Link
In the Lair, Ash, Brock and Pikachu watched as Donatello shifted his hands through the dresser, pulling out suits. Leonardo, Michelangelo and Raphael seemed picky about the suits, one being a bunny outfit. "What are they doing?" wondered Ash. After going through the entire dresser, the Turtles felt defeated.
"There seems to be nothing going on," Leonardo shrugged.
"We've watched every video in the rental store," Raphael pointed out.
"And I've tried every weird pizza recipe in the cookbooks," Michelangelo added.
"And Shredder's still trapped in Dimension X," Leonardo added. Donatello put a tuxedo with a purple linen back in the dresser.
"Guys, I hate to say it," he sighed. "But we're stuck in a rut." Ash and Brock couldn't believe that the Turtles had nothing to do.
"A rut!?" repeated Michelangelo. "We're in a canyon!"
"I might have something to pass the time," Ash offered. Mona Lisa came in and approached Raphael.
"So do I!" she voiced. "Like maybe a date topside?" Her flirty approach made Raphael a bit concerned.
"Mona Lisa, don't you think it's a little embarrassing for that?" he questioned.
"What's wrong?" smiled Mona Lisa. "Never been with a girl before?" Raphael's face was as red as his eye mask as the other Turtles laughed. Pikachu turned on the TV. April was on the screen.
"A series of strange robberies have been taken place," she reported. "Rather than money, criminals have gone after cufflinks." Footage showed men in suits and fedoras using hand-held vacuums to scoop up cufflinks that were made of gold or had jewels embedded. The bizarre caper had everyone watching. "It seems no cufflink is safe from these brazen criminals as there's no explanation to the purpose of these robberies as they're left unchecked, but Channel 6 will stay on the trail for any information that could answer why these accessories are being taken in broad daylight." Everyone in the Lair looked puzzled to the crime they watched.
"Cufflinks?" repeated Brock.
"Boy, is that something," Donatello awed.
"Gold, jewels, money…" listed Ash. "But cufflinks? Are we missing something?"
"You're not the only one," Donatello agreed. "Cufflinks are disappearing all over, but why? What could they be after?" Michelangelo had a guess.
"I know!" he voiced. Everyone turned to the orange-masked Turtle. "They want… cufflinks!" No one reacted.
"Ladies and gentlemen, Captain Obvious," Mona Lisa mocked.
"But why steal cufflinks?" questioned Donatello. "It's mind-boggling! It's baffling! It's…"
"Incredibly stupid!" snapped Raphael.
"But something is amiss about it," Brock agreed. "We need to investigate this!" Leonardo nodded.
"Turtles, I think we found a way out of our rut," he acknowledged.
"That's right!" cheered Raphael. "Well-dressed men everywhere are depending on us!" As Ash and Brock started getting themselves dressed with tuxedoes that fitted them, Leonardo grabbed a newspaper and returned.
"The first thing to do is figure out where these cufflink cronies will strike next," he studied as he read the paper. Ash and Brock gathered around the Turtles. Suddenly, one article caught Leonardo's attention. "Bingo! Here's a likely target!" Brock took a closer look at the article.
"Gargantuan toy company to give retirement ceremony for top toy designer?" he read. This stumped Donatello.
"What would give you the idea they'd strike this ceremony?" he wondered. Raphael's finger pointed to his head.
"Hey, genius," he teased. "Whenever they retire someone with high regard, they give him a set of gold cufflinks."
"And cufflinks like those would cost about $300," Mona Lisa added.
"It should make the perfect mark for these guys to attack," Brock confirmed. The Turtles agreed before wearing tuxedo suits with linens matching their mask colors. It was hard for them to get the suits on.
"Man, these things are tight!" gasped Donatello.
"Considering earlier," Raphael started. "You couldn't wait to try them on." Michelangelo wore a necktie with a flowery print. To Donatello, that wouldn't be accepted.
"You can't wear that!" he refused. "It's too loud!" He replaced the necktie with a bowtie, something Michelangelo didn't like.
"Bummer," he muttered. "Like, it's not really my style." Mona Lisa came to Raphael again.
"Sorry, but I disagree," she smiled. "Especially like this." She gave Raphael a kiss to his lips. It caused his bowtie to spin and his face to become as red as his mask. The other Turtles giggled. As the Turtles got rubber human face masks on, Splinter emerged to see the ordeal.
"This is intriguing," he remarked. "I have never seen any of you so well-dressed before." Michelangelo giggled to the occasion.
"We are quite the dapper dudes," he claimed.
"Indeed you are," Splinter agreed. "Though, I fail to see the reason for the matter."
"You see, Master Splinter," Donatello started. "We thought to investigate these cufflink robberies." Splinter understood the motive.
"Then I should tell you to heed caution, my sons," he warned.
"We will," Brock said. Ash turned to Pikachu, but he was asleep.
"You'd think that after being off for over a month," Raphael teased. "He'd be all rested up for a job like this." Mona Lisa scooped Pikachu into her scaly arms.
"I think he'll be safe down here," Ash shrugged.
"And I'll keep him company if anything should happen," Mona Lisa offered. Ash nodded before Donatello presented him and Brock turtle shell cufflinks.
"These are all common-law cufflinks except for one which has a tracking device inside," he instructed. "That way, when those cufflink criminals take them, we'll know where we need to go." Mona Lisa looked at the cufflinks.
"How much were they?" she questioned. "$10?"
"It'll pay off in the end," Raphael assured. "Now that we're all set, let's go meet the maker!" The Turtles and Trainers headed to the surface and to a large building that had a banner.
RETIREMENT TRIBUTE TONIGHT – EVERETT WAGSTAFF
However, the group entered through the sewers into the kitchen. "Boy, we get ourselves fancied up and can't get in through the front door," Raphael mulled.
"Raphael, don't forget," Michelangelo voiced. "We're crashing this party."
"It's already enough that we're toying this guy's retirement," Brock teased. "Besides, we don't even have invitations to pass the front door anyway." They saw a pair of tables where Leonardo sat with Ash and Brock while the other Turtles found the one next to it.
"I wonder what's for dinner," Donatello thought.
"Whatever it is, I hope pizza's on the menu," Michelangelo wished.
"In a classy joint like this?" irked Raphael as Ash shook his held head. Leonardo turned to find a balding gray-haired man in a black tuxedo and red bowtie. Quickly, he thought of a lie.
"We're… with the Halloween products division," he claimed.
"And we're with Action Figures and Trading Cards," Brock added. The balding man realized the ordeal.
"That explains why your friend is wearing his cap," he figured. "That certainly makes sense." Suddenly, a gray-haired man in glasses stood at the podium as spotlights focused on him.
"Words cannot do justice with to the fine toys that Everett Wagstaff made for this company," he started. He wove his hand to a brunette man that sat adjacent to the podium. The host pulled out a few toys, one being a blond doll wearing a purple shirt and blue skirt with a pull-string. "The Chatty Charmane doll…" He pulled the string before it retracted.
"Can I have a new toy, daddy?" the doll voiced. "Can I? Can I? Can I? Huh? Please?" The host put the doll down and picked up a toy robot.
"And who could forget the Transfarmers, robot that transform into barnyard machinery?" he continued as he folded and made the gold robotic toy into a tractor. "And of course, the Little Wonder Junior Assault weapon." He picked up a gun-shaped toy and pulled the trigger, firing lasers at everyone. Some champagne glasses were blasted, and the Turtles and Trainers ducked for cover as the weapon couldn't be stopped. One shot did that from the doorway. It destroyed the weapon. All turned to the front. There were a few men holding machine guns. The rotund man with the tiny mustache wearing a blue tuxedo over a pink shirt and a purple necktie. There was an older man in a gray trench coat over a gray tuxedo and a man with darker skin than Brock wearing a white tuxedo, all three of them wearing fedora hats.
"Drop the toy, buddy!" the rotund ordered. "As for you'se guys, we want all of your cufflinks!" Seeing who it was, the Turtles had to plan.
"Isn't that The Butcher?" asked Leonardo.
"I thought he'd look familiar," Raphael scowled. "Why would he want cufflinks?"
"What's the plan, Leonardo?" asked Ash. "We strike?"
"No, we'll get the drop on the when they leave," Leonardo instructed. They escaped as the Butcher continued to demand the cufflinks.
"Just hand them over nice and easy," he instructed with a nasally voice. "You'se don't want your shirts ruffled." After a few minutes, the Butcher held a sack of the cufflinks. Outside, the Turtles and Trainers looked over the ledge they're perched on. Finding the Butcher, they made their move after removing their masks.
"Attack!" shouted Leonardo. They leaped down and cornered the trio.
"Your cufflink caper is about to be collared, Butcher!" proclaimed Donatello. The Butcher's men snagged Donatello and threw him to the other Turtles. Ash brought out his tonfas and attacked, but the Butcher bounced him back with his enormous belly.
"Ash!" gawked Brock. The other man kicked Brock in the back and onto the rest.
"You'd think that six against three would make an easy score," Raphael moaned. The Butcher saw a metal overhang as his partners collected Ash's and Brock's cufflinks. The Butcher used his machine gun and shot the overhang down at the Turtles. Donatello saw it.
"Look out!" he called. The Turtles escaped from the overhang crushing them as the Butcher and his men drove off in a black car. Michelangelo and Leonardo helped Ash and Brock back on their feet.
"Who were they?" asked Brock. "You named one of them as the Butcher."
"Yeah, he did seem familiar close up," Raphael's agreed.
"That was Tony Vivaldi, also known as the Butcher," Leonardo informed. "He's one of Big Louie's men." Michelangelo gulped to the news.
"Are you saying the gangster's back in action?" he guessed.
"I'm afraid so," Leonardo confirmed. "He may explain why he needs every cufflink in the city."
"And how are you going to find out?" wondered Raphael. "Call him up?"
"No, but we'll need to switch sides," Leonardo corrected. Ash and Brock nodded.
"Donning Team Rocket's uniforms before," Ash plotted. "We can definitely flip our scripts around." Raphael giggled to the claim.
"That might be the best Fourth Wall break in the story so far," he joked. Donatello brought out a device and checked the radar. A dot was on the move per beep.
"I knew it," he confirmed. "The direction they're headed is indeed to Big Louie's hideout."
"Then let's get the dirt as to why Big Louie needs every cufflink he could find," Brock plotted. In an office at a new building, a middle-aged raven-haired man in a coral business suit was on call with Shredder.
"We've collected a lot of cufflinks," he claimed. "But we haven't found the pair you told us you're looking for."
"Big Louie, you incompetent chiseler!" snapped Shredder. "You must know something about the Cufflinks of Cathay!"
"Let's not have a meltdown, Shredder. Keep in mind that my men are-"
"Your men are don't know where to look! You know very well the Cufflinks of Cathay are somewhere in Manhattan!" The monitor had gone black while Louie wiped his forehead with a hankerchief.
"Jeez, what a grouch… but how can I find those cufflinks?" An answer came to him.
"So, it sounds like you're looking for a particular set," Brock guessed as he, Ash and Leonardo entered, all wearing trenchcoats, sunglasses and fedoras. Louie recognized Leonardo.
"The Turtles!" he gasped. "And a pair of youths… Is this some sort of joke!?"
"You know we mean business, Big Louie," Leonardo promised.
"Right now, I think you need more hands on deck," Brock lowly muttered. "Perhaps we can offer our own."
"Besides, it'll be easier with smaller bodies to escape the cuffs to link you to your crimes," Ash added. Louie was a bit skeptical.
"What makes you think I'll allow this to happen?" he questioned.
"We believe this is about a diamond in the rough," Leonardo spoke. "If you let us help, you can provide us a chance to find the certain pair." Louie felt he had little option knowing how much pressure Shredder put him in.
"Alright, you're hired," he surrendered. "But you'll need to do this favor that you're generously accepting."
"And that is?" asked Ash.
"You're familiar with Babyface Cleaver, right?" pondered Louie.
"You mean Babyface 'the Beaver' Cleaver?" guessed Leonardo.
"He and his mob are giving me huge issues on the Southside," Louie pointed out. "I want you guys to find Babyface and put him on ice." Ash's eyebrow rose at the request.
"On ice?" he repeated. "Why am I not feeling good about this?"
"It's a mission that I know you Turtles can do: put the Beaver and his mob on ice," Louie reiterated. Unable to walk out of the situation, Brock nodded.
"Alright, we'll do it," he muttered. "We won't let you down."
"Good," Louie nodded. "I want to hear good news." The others left as Ash whispered to Brock.
"What did Big Louie mean when he said to put Babyface 'on ice'?" he repeated again.
"What he means is…" started Leonardo before whispering the meaning. Ash gulped, not liking the result. As they reunited with the rest, could Ash have the nerve to put Babyface on ice?
TO BE CONTINUED...