My room was a mess. Okay, understatement. My room looked like it had been stomped on by a herd of mad cows.

I looked under the mattress. Frustrated, I threw my sheets on the floor.

"Utako! You know where my comb went?" I asked my battered doll.

I had waited until the last minute to pack for the family vacation. On my floor was a giant pile. Clothes, toothbrush, sunhat, homework. Utako on top.

My dad took care of all the big stuff, like our futons. He had been making trips all morning from the house to the gate. He warned me to not leave anything important behind.

I gave up on the comb.

As I emptied my backpack, my summoning scroll rolled out.

I had an idea. I opened my scroll, cringing in case it exploded again. I brushed the smoke away.

School stuff scattered around my scroll. I unrolled more of the parchment and saw there was extra space. I took off my hair clip and put it on the scroll.

I tapped the edge. The scroll rolled up.

There was a lump in the scroll. Frowning, I shook the scroll. My hair clip fell out. Guess my idea did not work after all.

I sighed. Teacher Funeno said chakra linked things to summoning scrolls. Too bad he did not teach us how. Only Hana learned summoning under her parents. Even then, she only got it one out of thirty times.

Footsteps clanked on my roof. Shisui jumped onto my rug.

"Squirt! You ready for—man! When was the earthquake?"

I stuffed a dress into my backpack. "I'm almost done."

"You still haven't finished packing? The trip's now!"

"Oh shut up and gimme that shirt!"

He did. I stuffed that in my backpack too. Shisui tossed me more stuff.

"That everything?"

I pounded my fist into the bag. "Yeah, think so. Utako's coming along, so get her too?"

"Towel?" he asked, grabbing my doll.

"Yeah."

"Toothbrush?"

"Yeah."

"Brush?"

"Yeah."

"Underwear?"

I stopped. Ignoring Shisui's laugh, I grabbed underwear from my dresser and shoved it into my backpack.

Still laughing, Shisui wiped a tear and said, "Don't worry. I mean, didn't you borrow clothes from Itachi before? I bet he'll lend you h—"

My backpack smacked his head.

We were late. My dad pushed us out of the house, shouting "Hurry, hurry!"

We ran. I had Utako in my arms. Shisui carried my homework. My dad had his luggage. It was my dad's fourth trip. I wondered if he took everything except the furniture.

At the gate, my dad and I fell to the ground.

Our relatives shook their heads. The nice ones carried our stuff to the wagon. In front of the wagon were two large oxen. On the wagons were big scrolls.

Most of my relatives had only a military backpack. Some were arm and guarded, like they were still on duty. Others did not bring anything at all.

"Where's Itachi?" I asked Shisui.

"Escort. He's probably running late," Shisui said.

Shisui got called away by one of our uncles.

My dad was helping load big scrolls onto the wagon. He noticed one of my uncles struggling with a bottle of sealing powder. My dad dropped the scroll to help. This caused the uncle lifting the other end of the scroll to fall. My dad tried to help the uncle with the scroll, but he bumped into the uncle with the bottle.

The three men were covered head to toe in powder. The uncle with the scroll shouted. My dad scratched his head and laughed.

Itachi's dad appeared. He snatched the bottle away. The uncle with the scroll excused himself. He picked up the scroll again. My dad scrambled to help.

Itachi's dad stopped my dad from getting anywhere near the scroll. Itachi's dad pointed sharply in the direction of the gate. My dad nudged up his glasses. He gave Itachi's dad a cheery pat on the shoulder.

Whatever my dad said made the uncle with the scroll, the uncle with the bottle snicker, and Itachi's dad glare in a way that made everyone hide. Except my dad.

As Shisui passed by, Itachi's dad shoved him the bottle. Shisui was now in charge of sealing. My two uncles went to secure the reins.

I wanted to help too. Before I could, there came music.

The royal Fire family was coming down the road. There were many people in front. Giggling entertainers, in beautiful kimonos, were latching onto Konoha shinobi. The shinobi were talking, mostly bragging. The only serious people were the carriers and the masked shinobi by the train of carriages.

A sprinkle of powder fell on me. "Hey, sweetie, isn't that the Fire Daimyo's carriage?" my dad asked.

"Yeah. They were there during the Chuunin Exam," I said.

"Wow! Are they leaving Konoha too?"

The road only led to the gate.

"Guess so, daddy."

When the group was close to us, the shinobi got all proper. But the entertainers stepped up. They did a dance.

"Greetings from the Fire Daimyo," they sang together.

Heads popped up. My cousins and uncles peeked up from their jobs to look at the pretty women.

A cane tapped the ground.

The royal carriage stopped in front of the Uchiha elder. The carriers set the carriage down. The masked guards stepped aside. The Daimyo withdrew the veil.

"Mr. Uchiha, this is really fortunate!"

"My Lord," the clan head said, bowing. All of my relatives knelt down.

"Ah, these numbers are nice! May I ask what the occasion is?"

"We are leaving for our ancestral home in Miyako. As we will be traveling the same road, it would be our honor to escort you."

"The Hokage told me of this plan! We travel together, before splitting one half of the way, correct?"

"Of course, our best would accompany you all the way through to the capitol."

"I agree completely! Ah, bless the sky gods for this lucky coincidence."

"The luck is ours, my Lord. If not, our clan would have never been able to leave. We are all grateful."

They went on to talk about politics.

I heard a giggle from another royal carriage.

"Thank you so much for accompanying me throughout Konoha!"

Itachi jumped down and bowed to the princess. "It is my honor."

The princess lifted the veil to her carriage. Her hair was beautiful, with flowers and beads. Her lips were rosy pink.

... Lipstick.

Lips.

Kiss.

Did I say beautiful? I meant stupid. All that makeup made her look like a clown.

"I mean it," the princess said. "I am so pleased you are chuunin now, and my father finally trusts you to take me around like you used to. We can even go outside the palace the next time you come."

"Ah."

She sighed and flapped open her fan. "We cannot go outside the walls till you are jounin though. I do not know if I can wait that long."

"There will be other guards," Itachi said.

"Old, with their nasty armor scaring off the few friends I have? No, I like you, Itachi," she giggled, leaning down and kissing him on the cheek.

My fingers twitched.

The princess whispered in his ear, "There will be another inauguration soon. I am going to convince my father to—"

"Hey!"

I tapped on Itachi's shoulder.

The princess looked up. "Excuse me, who are you?"

"I'm Ayae," I said.

The princess raised an eyebrow. After looking me up and down, she turned to Itachi. "Do you know her?"

"Yes," Itachi said.

"What is your relation to her?"

"Cousin," he said.

"How long have you two known each other?"

"Approximately three years."

"Date of birth."

"First of August."

"Age?"

"Ten."

I stared at both of them. What the heck! I was right here! She was asking about me when I was right here! I shoved Itachi aside.

"I'm right here, you know!"

"What is your point?" she asked me.

"Well, if you want to know about me, then you ask ME, not him!" I said. "It's rude!"

The princess was not upset. "If you insist. What is your favorite color?"

"Err, yellow, but that's not what—"

"Favorite hobby?"

"Dancing. Whatever, I'm saying—"

"Favorite food?"

"Ice cream. Listen—"

"Favorite animal?"

My eye twitched. "Cat."

"I like you," the princess said, smiling. "Dance for me!"

"What?"

She clapped her hands together. "Did you not say dancing is your favorite hobby? Then dance for me!"

I looked at her, disbelieving. "Now?! I'm not going to dance for you now!"

She smiled. "Yes, you are. You are now my little sister. Itachi, inform my father that I would like to add this girl to my carriage."

Itachi glanced at me. "If that is what you wish," he said.

After Itachi left, the princess beckoned for me to join her in the carriage. "Let us talk, little sister."

"Since when am I your—"

She leaned forward. "Since I said so. I want a Konoha friend, and now I have one. Itachi's little cousin is even better."

"What?"

"You know Itachi, correct?" she said, fanning herself. "So, be a good sister and talk. Beginning with the girls he is involved with at Konoha."

.

I sat beside the princess on a royal carriage. The horses were nice. The seats were soft.

I pulled back the veil.

My relatives were scattered around the forest. They scanned the road ahead for danger.

The escort was big: one Fire Daimyo, one princess, twelve royal council members, one priest, four noblemen, one messenger, one doctor, eight professional dancers, three shamisen players, one biwa stringer, twenty eight carriers, ten on-duty bodyguards, nine off-duty ones, and one lazy cat. This was not including all the other "important" people.

The Fire Daimyo knew he would get bored on a two day road trip. But with a hundred people, it was a party!

I collapsed back to my seat. I was at one end. Itachi was at the other end. The princess sat in the middle. She was braiding my hair, pulling on it until it hurt.

"Stop moving, little sister."

I squirmed. "Stop trying to make me bald!"

"I would not be if your hair was not so awful and unruly. Did you use shampoo this morning?"

"Yes!"

The princess sighed. "Some are just born unfortunate. Poor little sister."

Or maybe my hair was knotting because it did not like nasty fingers running all over it. Excuse me for not having Itachi's hair.

I glared in his direction.

An idea came to me. I looked back and forth between him and the princess. Oh, this could work.

Itachi caught my glee, alarmed.

"Say…" I began.

The princess took a metal pin from her bun and used it to lock strands of my hair in place. "Hm? Yes, little sister?"

"If you don't like my hair, why don't you use Itachi's," I said. She stopped.

The princess looked at her bodyguard. She pondered it over. "Now that I think of it…"

"C'mon," I said. "His is perfect. It's soft and silky—"

Itachi could no longer keep his silence. "I don't think it is wise—"

"And long and straight—" I added.

"To abandon what you have so far—"

"I've never seen a single strand out of place," I said. "If four combings haven't broken my hair, I don't think you should waste time with mine anymore."

If Itachi had ever looked more horrified, it would be now. "It is not a good idea—"

"It smells ni-ice," I sang.

"Itachi, turn around," the princess said.

Ayae: 1. Itachi: 0.

Itachi looked ready to jump out of the carriage. With his ninja skills, he might just.

"What's wrong, Itachi?" I gloated. "You heard the princess. Turn around."

I got his death glare.

The horses neighed and stopped. The veil lifted.

"Lunch time!" Shisui said. "C'mon squirt, jump off."

"Now?"

Itachi let out a breath of relief.

The princess sat up straight. "It is already noon?"

"Yes, your highness," Shisui said. "You and your father will dine at this restaurant."

I jumped out. We were in front of a seafood restaurant, judging from the golden koi on the roof.

Itachi landed on the other side. He extended a hand to the princess. She took it and stepped off. Itachi held out a sun umbrella for her.

They walked side by side to the restaurant. I watched, a bit jealous. Itachi never did that for me. In fact, he passed by without a word.

"What are you waiting for, little sis?" the princess asked, beckoning me with her fan. "Come with us." She did not look back.

I stuck out my tongue. She could not boss me around!

"Don't make the princess wait, squirt," Shisui said, nudging me forward.

"No," I said. "Take me to my dad!"

"Why?"

"I don't wanna eat here," I said.

"But the food here's great!" he said. "Or, I hope it is, considering how much moolah we spent to reserve this place."

"Well, what if I don't like seafood?"

"Right. Well, okay, then I'll tell those two that you won't be coming."

"Thanks, Shisui."

"They probably wouldn't mind," Shisui added. "After all, the highness and Itachi get the lunch in private, with no interruptions…" I did not like his grin. "Just the two of them together in a small room for a hourrrow ow OW."

I lifted my foot from his. "I changed my mind. I'm hungry for fish."

"Whatever you say," he said, hopping on one leg.

After waving bye to Shisui, I heaved open the door to the restaurant. The inside was glamorous! It was full of water paintings and incense.

I looked around. Itachi and the princess were with the hostess, who was leading them to a divided section of the restaurant.

Itachi held the curtain for the princess. I dodged in as well. I made a face at him.

"What, can't wait for me?"

"At two thousand ryou an hour, Ayae, I'm afraid not," he said, letting the curtain fall.

"Okay, you know what, just because—"

Itachi's fingers went through my hair. He helped me untangle all the awful braids.

"Don't be left behind," he said, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

He reappeared beside the princess, sending me one last look.

Our table was in the back. The place was surrounded by shoji, bamboo matting, and lanterns. Giant vases of plants sat in the corner.

"Ah, so glad we can rest from that awfully bumpy ride," the princess said, making herself comfortable on a cushion. Itachi knelt to her right. I took the seat to her left.

A waitress poured us drinks before bowing and leaving. Next came a waiter, who asked in a funny accent what we would like.

"Fugu-chiri," the princess said, waving him away.

The waiter bowed.

Hold on, what about my order? I raised my hand, but the waiter was gone.

"Um, what about me?" I said, scratching my head with my raised hand.

"What about you?" the princess asked.

"What am I eating?"

"Silly sis, same thing I am." She tapped my head with her fan.

Great, if only I knew what a fugu-chiri is. I wanted to tell her that I wanted shrimp.

"So, Itachi, you've been escorting her?" I asked.

The princess answered for him. "Yes. I hired him to accompany me through Konoha. He showed me around the clothing and entertainment district. We even ate at this place called Suzuki's."

Okay. Let me get this straight. Itachi got paid two thousand ryou an hour to shop, play, and eat. Where do I sign up?

"How did you like it?" I asked.

"It could have been better," the princess said disdainfully. "The restaurant was decent but modest. The spices were obviously not imported from Suna. The dishes were too heavily seasoned. Some plates did not look appetizing. The waiter's manner was revolting, the seats were tacky…"

She went on and on. Even though a place like Yakiniku Q was more popular, Suzuki's was still one of Konoha's best, right after Shushuya. If Tamaki were here, she would be so insulted.

"… the lighting was nauseating. I requested a private table, but there were eyes everywhere. I planned on dining, not signing autographs, and we did not get peace until the restaurant staff finally shooed them out. Konoha is far too impolite and unabashed at staring."

"Well, big sis, maybe it's because we don't see royalty every day."

"My presence is a privilege."

I rolled my eyes. "Sounds great. But why do you need Itachi for all of that?"

"Silly little sister. I cannot wander around the streets by myself."

I dodged her head-tap. "I can, and I'm younger!"

She giggled. "Cute. Unfortunately, I am too important to be left unguarded."

Oh, please! There were plenty of other princesses from other countries to kidnap.

"But why him?" I asked again, and Itachi looked at me.

"Is it bothering you that I chose him, little sis?" the princess asked.

YES!

"No." I pouted. "Just wondering."

"If you must know," the princess said, "my father hired him in the past. Itachi caught my eye, and I had him serve under me several times. You can say I grew rather fond of your cousin, little sister. He is much better than those other fools who used to be my guards."

"What was wrong with them?"

"I did not like them," she said. "So I had them executed. They never last past a week anyway."

She smiled sweetly.

I fell off my cushion. I made a note to prepare a funeral. Itachi had a suicide job.

The princess and Itachi went on to talk about business things that I did not understand. I stared at them. They looked happy together. The way they stand, walk, and sit fit each other. I felt left out. Even their talk was too grown up.

Bored, I reached for the cup of tea in front of me.

OWIE! Hot, hot, hot! I waved my hand in the air. I popped my finger into my mouth.

"… but you will go with me to the capitol," the princess said.

I turned. I understood that.

I listened, my finger still in my mouth.

"It has yet to be determined," Itachi said, reaching for his own cup. He blew the vapor away before taking a sip. The cup did not burn him. Of course.

"But you will go with me to the capitol," the princess said, frustrated. "It is part of your mission."

"Ah, for the first half. But we are leaving the boundary of Konoha's influence, and my mission is limited to be within the range of Konoha."

"So you will not be going."

My ears perked up.

"Depends on what further instructions I receive." Itachi looked at me, then at the princess. "However, as of now, I will probably not be accompanying you all the way to the capitol."

Her fan stopped. "It will be a yes. Even without the mission, there is still our contract."

"The contract expired when I obtained chuuninship."

The fan clicked close. "It is renewed."

"It is still pending…"

"I do not think so," she said lowly.

Oho! So Itachi and the princess were not so buddy-buddy after all. Grinning, I brought the cup to my lips and blew.

"My father approved of these orders. It would take one day to pend at most. Konoha should have granted it by now."

"There—"

The princess slammed her fan on the table. "No. You belong to me."

I spat out my tea.

Holy rice cakes. It was SO BITTER! I covered my mouth, my face twisting into twenty different expressions of disgusted.

I grimaced and pushed the cup far away from me. Nasty, nasty, nasty!

Itachi looked away, hiding his smile.

The princess did not notice me. "Is that not right, Itachi?"

I made one final gag.

Itachi did not blink. "Of course."

"Good," the princess said.

Pleased, she turned to her own tea cup. She brought it to her lips. I was about to warn her. But then, I thought better of it.

I was disappointed when she swallowed. Aw, I was expecting funny faces.

But then, she brought the cup back down onto the table.

"Oh heavens…" she said. "T-this tea is…" She brought the back of her hand to her lips.

"Awful?" I finished.

She nodded. "So right, little sister," she said shakily.

She breathed, then shoved her tea across the table.

"The ratio is completely OFF! The tea is so dilute, it is HOT TAP WATER. I have never tasted something so bland before in my life! WAITER!"

With the slam of her fan, three people came rushing in. It was the waitress from before, along with two others, all bowing. "Y-yes, princess?" they asked.

"I want real tea if you may," the princess said. "Get this out of my sight!"

"We are so sorry, princess."

"Right away, princess."

"Pardon us, princess."

In a flash, the three workers cleared the table. One worker even snatched the cup Itachi still had in his hand. Another worker pulled out a cloth and cleaned up my spills from before. Then they poured the three of us new drinks. They waited, head down.

The princess lifted the new cup. She looked at the waitress. "I hope that this time, it was prepared right," the princess said.

A finger tapped the rim of her cup.

"If I may," Itachi said.

The princess brought the cup down.

"Oh, I am sorry, Itachi. I am not thinking clearly, today being so upsetting and all," she said. "Here."

The princess handed her cup to Itachi, who took the first sip. He closed his eyes and nodded, offering the cup back to her.

After the princess took her sip, she looked happy. Relieved, the waitress excused herself away.

As she left, other people entered. Twenty different plates were set on the table. Ivory chopsticks. Ceramic bowls. Sauce dishes. A big pot of simmering soup. Platters of sliced seafood.

I was overwhelmed. But even with all the colors, nothing looked tasty. I squinted at the weird looking gooey fishes and spaghetti mushrooms.

The princess inhaled. She grabbed her chopsticks, clapped her hands, and took a piece of some funky fish.

She let the fish cook in soup, before dressing it in sauce and placing it on her plate. "Eat," she told Itachi, shoving her plate in front of him. "I am starving!"

I got confused. I had been taught that the important people ate first. It was strange that the princess was letting Itachi eat before her. Huh. Guess it was self-serve then!

So, gooey fishy or spaghetti mushrooms? Heck, I would eat both to get rid of this tea taste in my mouth. I spied a fat shrimp and snatched it with my chopsticks. I dipped it in the sauce, ready to take a bite...

… until the shrimp went flying.

A chopstick shot through the air, shish kebobbing the shrimp and pinning it into the opposite wall.

My mouth was still open.

"Ayae, don't eat anything." Itachi's hand covered his mouth.

He began coughing. Alarmed, the princess placed a hand on his shoulder. "Itachi? Itachi?!"

Then, a billion things happened at once.

There was a noise from the room of the Daimyo. There were screams. People flashed into the room. The vases in the corner smashed. The shoji screen collapsed onto our table, knocking over the pot, slashing soup everywhere. The princess's fan flashed. There were blurs in every direction, the sounds of clangs and clicks and gongs.

I did not get the chance to breathe, to think, to even blink when an arm wrapped around my waist. That was when everything vanished from my sight. My next breath was the hot outside air, as I was shoved into a carriage.

My mouth was still open, because I thought I was about to eat a shrimp.

.

"Mhm-hmm!"

"M-mhm-mhm!"

"Damn, which one is it?"

That one, you idiots! That one! Even a blind person could tell which one was the damn princess!

"I think it's this one…"

"Could be in disguise?"

I threw a tantrum, thrashing to get the ropes off me. I kicked my feet and sprayed dirt at my captors.

"Or not."

"Then who's this other girl? Hired as the double?"

"Why not ask them yourselves?"

Itachi knocked out the nearest bad guy.

The other bad guys went into battle. Weapons flew everywhere. A kunai fell near me, and I scooted toward it. I wiggled a hand free of the binds and filed away at the ropes. Two ninjas charged at Itachi and got the end of each other's sword.

Three down, two to go. Itachi, hurry up, dammit! My wrists were chafing! A little more sawing, and the last strand broke free. I yanked off the bandana around my mouth. I untied the ropes around my ankles.

By now, the first fallen bad guy came around. He noticed me.

"Ugh, where do you think you're going?" he slurred, grabbing my foot.

"Eep!" I kicked him square in the jaw. He rolled over and died again.

"Haha, gotcha," one of the men laughed, holding Itachi in a vice grip. I nailed the man in the head with a giant log. After Itachi was freed, we finished off the last bad guy.

Thus, victory was ours.

I noticed squirming in the background.

"Mhm! Hm-HMMM!"

Itachi knelt by the princess and pulled down the cloth gag.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK—"

He pulled the cloth back up.

"We can just leave her," he told me.

I beamed.

Then we left the forest, and everyone lived happily ever after.

Oh, and he held out an umbrella for me.

The end.

"Squirt, I'm no psychologist, but I'm pretty sure you shouldn't be smiling right now."

Why Shisui? Why ruin my fantasy?

"Shut up," I scowled.

Shisui shrugged. "Eh. Just expected the crying, shivering, crazy psychotic episodes that kids get when they undergo trauma."

"Excuse me for not being traumatized."

"Itachi got you outta there before you could even blink, didn't he?"

"Yeah."

"What a show off."

"I know."

What really happened during the ambush? I had seen one flying bowl of soup, before Itachi tossed me into an empty carriage. I sat, hearing nothing. Minutes later, my clansmen flooded the restaurant. Then everything calmed, with the struggling rogue ninjas led out.

By the time I stepped out of the carriage, my relatives were helping people out of the restaurant. Some customers were trembling. Most were annoyed at not getting to eat.

Within the chaos, I found Itachi with the princess. But there were many guards around her this time. Itachi saw me and left the group without anyone noticing.

I asked what was going on. He ignored my questions, checking me for injuries. He even made me show him my wrists, my shoulders, and the back of my neck. I stomped down my foot when he brushed my hair aside to look for signs of head injury.

I yanked him off me, saying that I was one hundred percent F.I.N.E.

He stopped.

When his expression softened again, I thought he would relax.

But no. Next thing I knew, he dumped me with Shisui. Shisui didn't even get a chance to protest.

And so, we sat grumpily on the band wagon, next to a bunch of gossiping dancers and annoying string music.

"So," Shisui said, "you don't want to be here. I don't want to be here. And I don't think Itachi has the authority to keep us here."

"And?" I wanted to know where Shisui was going with this.

"I say we rebel!"

I lit up. I liked that idea. "Yeah. We should just get up and leave!"

"And he can't stop us!"

"Revolt!" He raised his fist up in the air.

"Revolt!" I did the same.

"Yay!" the dancers giggled, cheering with us.

More string music.

I hung my head. How about some war drums here?

"So, you'll tell Itachi, right?" I asked Shisui.

Shisui scratched his head. "Maybe you should."

"You think he'll listen to me? You do it."

"Well, I am enjoying my prosperous life. I don't feel suicidal today, and I don't want to be breathing out a straw for the rest of my life. You tell him."

"No, you tell him! You're older!"

"Like that counts. You know what happened five years ago? Me, ten. Me, the attention span of a fruit fly. Me, got bored of watching a sleeping baby. Him, five. Him, angry to find crying baby alone at home. Me, met some pretty nurses in the hospital next morning. I'm not repeating that experience again."

"What if you remind him of your sacred ties of friendship?" I gave a cheesy grin.

"Oh right, the sacred tie of friendship that is written on this wonderful certificate of friendship here," Shisui said, presenting an imaginary piece of paper.

"Oh come on! You're scared of our ten year old cousin. BE A MAN!"

"You do it! He wouldn't hit a girl!"

"BE A WOMAN!"

"You go!"

"You!"

The strings stopped. "Both o' yer a pair o' chickens," the musician said. "You, lil missus, and you, youn' lad, get outer 'ere! It's hard 'nuff to be playin' on movin' 'round without yer ruckus!" He booted us out.

We landed flat in the dirt.

The wagon wheeled away, leaving us alone on the road.

"At least we're free now?" Shisui laughed.

I slapped my face.

We started walking. On the bright side, there was no more annoying string music.

To our surprise, there was a royal carriage down the road. It was stopped by the forest. I was ready to thank our good luck. But then there came a giant scream.

"LAY YOUR HANDS OFF ME!"

That was the princess's voice. Was she being kidnapped again? We rushed to the crime scene.

Wait. If that was the case, then what happened to Itachi?

There were more screams, the sound of bodies falling, and a slap.

Shisui pulled the curtain open. Both Itachi and the princess were on the floor of the carriage. They looked up.

Before I knew it, I had the air knocked out of me.

"Little sis!"

I was sandwiched between the princess and the ground. She pulled me back up again and hugged me blue.

"I missed you," she exclaimed, acting like a girl who found her long lost… doll.

Itachi stepped out of the carriage. He looked as if hell maimed him, one cheek raw. He gave a weary look when both the princess and I glared at him.

"You tyrannous dictator!" she spat.

"You bully!" I yelled.

I exchanged a look with the princess.

"Uh, you first?"

"No, you may."

We cleared our throats.

"You are by no means unaware that you have no control over me!" the princess told Itachi.

"Shisui and I both agreed you can't boss us around!" I said.

"I have higher status, higher command, and I order you to do whatever I wish, not the other way around."

"Just because you're a chuunin doesn't mean you can make me to do whatever you want!"

"If I wish to be accompanied by someone from the outside, I have every right to have it so, and you cannot deter my choices by lying nor by forcibly keeping us apart."

"You can't just throw me to Shisui!"

"So perform your duty or expect me to assume you are prohibiting me my rights."

"Seriously, I get the no-friends thing, but I thought at least we got over the five-kilo-distance crap! Itachi, I'm a person, and really, I think you should treat me like I'm one!"

"Or else you are following all my other pathetic guards to the execution blade!"

"Or else I'm telling your mom!"

A pause.

"That is harsh," the princess told me.

"I'm not the one killing him!"

"My sentence is swifter."

"You have a point."

For once, the princess and I were on the same page, much to Itachi's misery. The princess did not like learning that I was not coming. By showing up, I only made things worse.

Itachi waited for us to finish. Then he walked over, scarily calm. We swallowed. He switched his gaze between the princess and me, deciding who he should deal with first.

And of course, he chose me. Because even with a princess yelling at him and slapping him, I totally gave him the harder time. Me, the innocent bystander, the unfortunate victim, the little poor—okay, maybe not, but still. The princess should go first.

"Ayae…" he began.

I shrunk like a kid prepared for a scolding.

"Itachi." I nervously laughed.

"You seem to refuse to let me have any peace of mind, because every time, you somehow return to break it. Tell me, do you wish for my death?" he asked.

"Um, no, but—"

"Do you enjoy jeopardizing your own life?"

"Of course not but—"

"Then after experiencing an incident that nearly did, wouldn't you agree it makes sense that you should be placed under safer hands so a second incident will not occur again?"

"Okay, yes, but—"

"So we agree you should. Now, have I forced you to do anything else?"

"No?"

"Have I asked anything of you at all?"

"… no."

"So will you explain how by watching for your interest, I am, as you say, 'bossing you around,' especially when I have neither restricted your freedom nor requested anything of you."

"Um, it's, well, it's because, err… well…" I scratched my head. Huh. "You see, um, you can't just… my freedom is, well, I mean, yeah that, but, um, it's not my will?" I ended my blabbing. "Yeah."

Itachi asked, "Do you want to live?"

"Um, yes?"

"Do you want to be unhurt?"

"Yes?"

"Then who would you hire to protect you? An alert shinobi with two hands open, or a distracted one with one hand full?"

"Is that a trick question?"

"No, it is not. The first. Therefore, it is in your interest and your 'will', and since I am taking both into consideration, I clearly see you as a human being. Everything else is irrelevant, so please return to Shisui and leave."

Well, I was defeated. My mind got looped around so many times that I swore he made a double helix knot with my brain.

Itachi went to the princess.

"Contrary to what you believe, highness, I have orders from your father, which overrides any command you can give me." He extended a hand. "One of those orders includes making sure you reach your destination on time."

The princess narrowed her eyes. Chin up, she turned her cheek and said, "My father never said you could take little sister away from me!"

Itachi was unfazed. "No, he did not," he said. "Instead, he asked me to protect you to the best of my abilities. He asked me to take the route that has the highest chance of guaranteeing your safety."

"But—"

"That includes Ayae being exempt from this ride. I will not repeat my mistake and leave your safety to chance again. I am one person, highness, and I suggest that you do not overestimate my abilities."

"And if I say I do not care and want little sister with me nonetheless?"

"I will not permit it."

The princess did not like being bossed around.

Her fan flipped open. Senbon needles shot out. Itachi flickered away. The needles dug deep into a tree several meters away.

Surprised, I fell on my butt.

The princess snapped her fan close. "I never need anyone's permission."

I turned to a puddle when she smiled at me. She dropped her fan in my lap. "Little sister, do me the favor of guarding that?" she asked.

I played hot potato with the fan, scared that a needle would launch out.

The princess attacked. Itachi dodged. While he dodged again, shuriken slipped down her sleeve.

"Are you done," Itachi sighed, after he caught a shuriken midair.

"Not until you concede." The princess yanked out one of the flowers in her hair. Her bun came loose, her soft locks falling down.

The glint in her eyes matched the glint of her dagger, a lotus flower wrapped around the handle. The chiming princess was gone. The scary nutcase was here.

I decided to get out of the firing range. I joined Shisui on the sidelines. The two of us watched the fight, sharing a bucket of popcorn.

"Man, and she almost had him."

"Damn, I know right?"

"Is a millimeter too much to ask for?"

"At least cut off one strand of hair!"

"Ugh, show off," we complained.

I stuffed another handful of popcorn in my mouth before freezing. Wait, where did this popcorn come from?

Itachi brought the struggling princess to us. He greeted Shisui in monotone. "Cousin."

"You'd think I've gained enough of your love, trust, and compassion to at least earn a 'Hello, Shisui!' or 'Greetings, dear cousin!' or 'Salutations, friend!' or—"

"Stop."

"Alright, what's gotten you in a knot?"

The princess kicked furiously. Tired, Itachi said, "This. Shisui, it would be easier to pacify my client if you would kindly take Ayae away." He let the princess go. The princess huffed, snatching her fan back from me.

"Mhm. I see." Shisui pretended to be a psychologist. "And why is the little highness upset?"

"He is keeping my little sister away from me!" The princess pointed her fan at Itachi.

"Ah, is that so?" Shisui scribbled in his imaginary notebook. "And how does that make you feel, highness?"

"It makes me feel furious!"

"Mhm. I see. If so, Itachi, dude, take this from a professional - keep the squirt on board. Then there would be no need to pacify, isn't that right, Ms. Highness? Someone of your standing must need companionship during this hour, and it's only natural to be enraged when you are deprived of what you deserve."

The princess blinked. Pleased, she smiled. Her voice chiming again, she told Shisui, "You capture my sentiments perfectly. Remind me to obtain a copy of your profile in the near future, Mr…"

"Uchiha Shisui at your service!" Shisui introduced himself. "Also known as Shisui the Mirage, Shisui of the Body Flicker, Shisui the Totally Amazing, Superman Shisui, Mr. Good-Looking, Mr. Manliness, Mr. Hotnesss…"

I facepalmed. Of course Shisui would take the moment to advertise himself off to the richest family in the Fire Country.

"You are hired," the princess said, causing me to do a double take.

"Well, I'm honored, but—"

"Ten thousand ryou if you do what I ask."

Being the sellout he was, Shisui agreed in the bat on an eye. "I'm hired!"

Pointing to Itachi, the princess smiled. "Mr. Shisui, fight him."

Shisui still had unchewed popcorn in his mouth when he got the order. Everyone waited until…

"Okay!" Shisui went into a funky kung fu pose that looked like a cross between a praying mantis, a drunken monkey, and a dying pig. The popcorn bucket on his head did not help.

Itachi was not impressed. "Shisui, I have no time for this."

Shisui shrugged. "Then let the squirt stay."

With that, Shisui head-butted the bucket in the air and vanished. In a blink, he was by Itachi. Sometime in between the exchange of a million blows, the princess sneaked behind me.

"Shh, let us leave those two," she said, pulling me toward the carriage.

"Hey! Wait!" I pulled my wrist away.

She stopped. "I thought you wanted to be with me."

I thought about my choices again. Scary nutcase with twenty million pointy objects, or annoying string music. Maybe the band wagon was better after all.

"I change my mind. I think Itachi is right."

Her voice lowered. "You are coming."

"Am not!"

Her eyes flashed menacingly. "Then shall we duel?" she asked. "I win, you come."

Oh fishsticks, the nutcase was after me now. I was about to run. But then, I thought it over. Itachi was busy with Shisui. The princess was already worn out from her fight with Itachi. This was my chance to kick butt!

Grinning, I balled my hands into fists.

She took the first move. I missed her strike. She dodged my punch. Her fan came shooting at my head, but I got myself out of the way. But before I knew it, she spun and gained another attack. I winced at the bruise.

The princess flapped her fan open. "Poor little sister, shall we treat it in the carriage?"

"I'm not your sister!"

Her fan clicked close. Flicking her wrist, she blocked my punch. My foot swiveled, surprising her. I took the opening. She was faster and kicked my calf, making me fall. I bounced back up and wiped the dirt off my arms.

"Little sister, you fight like a boy," she said. "So gaudy."

Oh no she didn't. Insulting me was one thing. But insulting me with big words?

I charged. Screw textbooks, screw forms. My lack of stances threw her off. After two dodges, one drop kick, one trip, four punches, and three fan-whacks, my hand came striking down. The princess snapped shut her eyes, screaming.

Thud.

Something caught me.

I looked up, my grin wiped off. Someone caught me.

"Ayae, what do you think you are doing?" Itachi asked.

In the distance, Shisui was tied up from head to toe in a rope cocoon. He was snailing over to his popcorn. Their fight was over.

I gave a nervous laugh. "Ah, Itachi, hi. Um… she wanted to fight me?"

"You are not allowed to harm my client," he said.

"But she attacked me like ten times," I said, showing my bruised arm.

Itachi's eyes narrowed at the bruises, but his voice did not change. "Regardless, you cannot attack her," he said. "Leave us. Now."

I wanted to tell him that was exactly what I was fighting FOR.

I snapped my mouth shut. "You know what, Itachi. I change my mind! I'm coming along, and you can't stop me!"

The princess was overjoyed. Itachi was not. "I can and will stop you."

"Bring it on!"

Yeah no.

He vanished. The next thing I knew, Itachi lifted me off my feet.

"Put me down! Put me down!" I pulled his hair.

He dumped me with Shisui. I sat in the dirt, pouting.

"No! I want her with us!" The princess got blocked by Itachi.

"Give that back!"

Itachi distanced himself and presented the princess her fan. "I will, after you stop fighting."

"Heavens, I hate you!"

Freeing a hand, Shisui reached for his popcorn bucket again. There were only crumbs left. "Aw man! Forget this, I'm going back to get more grub. You kids have fun with your tween drama."

I was about to argue that I was not part of their drama when my stomach growled. I had not eaten since breakfast. I was so hungry I could smell barbeque.

Wait. I was smelling barbeque.

"Honey! What are you kids doing at the side of the road?"

I learned where Shisui had gotten his popcorn from.

The oxen wagon approached us. My dad waved at us with a spatula in hand. He was in a chef's hat and apron. There was smoke coming from the middle of the wagon.

The wagon stopped before us. "Did your carriage break down?" one of my uncles asked.

Seeing us, the adults exchanged a look. The princess was in hysterics. Itachi was a mess. I had bruises. Shisui was in his rope cocoon.

To answer their question, Shisui said, "Eh, we get a wee bit hangry. Mr. Kenta, any pie left on board?"

My dad disappeared into the wagon. His head popped up again, two pies in hand. "Pecan or walnut?"

That was enough for Shisui and I to scurry to the wagon.

"You guys are barbecuing shrimp?" I gasped.

Shisui and I called first dibs. We went on to cram as much food into our mouths as possible.

The princess blinked at the food on the wagon.

"Holy! Highness, care to join us?" my dad offered.

"That smells pleasant," she admitted.

Itachi was the last to give in.

Five hours later, we all sat together against a setting sun. Playing cards were tossed here and there. From our truth or dare game was a chewed off shoe, a tower made of toothpicks, a poorly done origami crane, and a jar of spilled jam.

My dad was leading a carol, getting my relatives, and this fat cat to sing along and start a wave. The princess was testing out bags of foods unfamiliar to her. Itachi wrote out his mission report. I patted my stomach, slowly drifting to sleep.

I liked the princess. We did makeup, and nail painting, and talked about the capital. So I was disappointed when I woke up in the morning and saw the princess was gone, the royal family having left for the capital.

I was surprised to see Itachi had stayed behind, asleep by my side.