Our story begins in the seemingly normal city of Redmond, Washington. It was a fairly average town with a generic coffee shop on every corner, hundreds of people destroying their necks looking down at their phones, and yellow ball people buying shady glowing fruit from colorful ghosts in the back alleys. In the heart of this perfectly normal and completely uninteresting city was a dilapidated and abandoned skyscraper from a failed company that would serve as the setting for this tale.

And who would in their right mind would want to stay at this dumpster of a building? Well, certainly no one in their right mind. If you have been following for the last two seasons, then you already know who's in charge. The most heartless, merciless, sadistic, sarcastic, most egotistical television show how in the history of reality TV. It's –

"Me!" Chris McLean popped up in front of the camera, laughing with sadistic glee. "Welcome back to the Total Drama Multiverse Tour! It's been a long, tough road – especially for our contestants – but we finally made it. It's season three, baby!

"Ah, time sure flies when you're having fun." Chris continued, walking through the front entrance into the garbage-filled lobby. "It seems like it was only yesterday when I was exiled from my universe and hosted the first season of the Dramaverse Tour on the Boiling Isles. We all remember how mean girl Boscha pulled an impressive heel-turn and tackled her way to the winner's circle. And who could forget season two – Total Drama Panzer – when poor, down-on-her-luck Anchovy turned her luck around and literally rolled her way to a million big ones?

"But now we're in a new universe with a brand-new twist," said Chris as he rode the creaking elevator to the twenty-sixth floor. When he stepped off, the rope snapped and the elevator fell all the way back to ground level. "One I'm sure the current generation will appreciate. Because in this universe, video games are real! That's right! Your favorite characters are starring in their own reality show."

Chris entered another spacious lobby with two curved staircases leading to the next floor. Most of the broken windows were boarded up and there was a large gaping hole in the middle of the floor that led to a four-floor drop. The lobby appeared to have been recently painted, though it looked like had just thrown buckets of paint on the wall and called it a day. One side was painted red and had a flag with a giant "N" hanging from the second floor; the other side was painted blue with a giant "P" flag.

"If you followed along this far, you already know how it works," said Chris. "Twenty-four contestants – or Players – will be spending the next ten weeks living in this dump for the amusement of the entire viewing world. And the best part: I don't have to worry about killing them thanks to the wonderful video game mechanic know as respawn points. Which means I don't have to hold back on these chumps," He rubbed his hands together, cackling evilly.

He walked upstairs into a large room with a bunch of stools facing a green screen. And with a push of a button, that green screen projected the season one Total Drama Island elimination ceremony with a roaring campfire.

"Players will compete in challenges to see who will be sent to the dreaded Screening Room Elimination Ceremony©, where players will decide who is the weakest link. Players who are safe will receive these beautiful game awards." He picked up a dented statue of himself that totally isn't recycled from Total Drama Action because it was cheaper than buying actual awards. "And those who don't make the cut will be forced to walk the Steps of Failure and take a trip down the Elevator of Losers and leave Total Drama forever. Or if we decide to bring someone back spice things up. It's pretty much a staple at this point."

"The player who makes it to the end of the off the season will win the awesome prize of one million credits," Chris continued as he walked down to the lobby again. "But before they can reach the cool million, they'll have to brave perilous obstacles, ravenous beasts, and the spite of their fellow contestants. Will the players level up to the occasion, or will it be game over?

"That's what we're here to find out on TOTAL – DRAMA – GAMERS!"


After another toe-tapping music video involving the many horrifying deaths of the future contestants that should have earned the show an "R" rating, Chris was standing back outside the failed company building.

"Welcome back to Total Drama Gamers," said Chris with the enthusiasm of a psychotic murderer. "Hey, I take offense to that comment. Anyway, we're just a few minutes away from starting, and right now we're just waiting for our players. Who really should've been here by now…." Chris checked his watch curiously. "Where the heck are they – "

"Hah…hah…Chris! We're – we're here!"

The reality host looked surprised as he skimmed down the road while the dilapidated bus he rented from a shady man in a dark alley was slowly inching across the pavement, missing all four wheels. It also seemed to lack headlights, bumpers, windows – and it you looked under the hood, the engine was missing as well. Well, that's what you get when you pay with twenty dollars.

The bus was scrapping across the asphalt, sending sparks flying everywhere, being pushed by two large individuals.

The first of them was literally a giant brown gorilla wearing a tie with the Initials "DK." The monkey's hair was matted due to the intense amount of sweat dripping off his fur.

"Let's welcome the first player of the game: Donkey Kong!" said Chris brightly, ignoring the ape's heavy wheezing. "So, DK, any plans for winning this thing?"

"Water…water…," Donkey Kong pleaded before passing out on the ground.

The second player was an intimidatingly large bald man with skin as pale as paper, red branded tattoos, and a thick beard. The large man wiped the sweat from his brow, letting out a mildly tired sigh, but still remained standing as he walked around the bus to greet the host.

"Kratos, my man, how you doing?" Chris greeted cheerfully with a double finger pistol.

"Something is wrong with your chariot, boy," said Kratos gruffly. "You need to get it fixed."

"Uh, I'm a man, thank you very much," said Chris importantly.

"Quiet, boy!" Kratos growled.

"Okay, okay, call me whatever you want," said Chris, raising his hands in surrender and backing away slowly.

The bus doors started to creek open with an unbearable screech like nails on a chalkboard, then stopped halfway. Someone inside grabbed the edges of the door and forced it open the rest of the way. The first to exit the scream metal death trap was a giant raccoon man in blue carrying his luggage on a hooked cane on his shoulder.

"Sly, my guy, how's it going?" Chris greeted the Thievius Racoonus with a fist bump.

"Chris, my man," Sly returned the greeting in kind. "Gotta say, I'm really looking forward to this."

"That great – now give me back my wallet," said Chris, his smile immediately turning to a scowl. The raccoon grinned sheepishly as he handed Chris his wallet back and stepped aside for the next player: an elf-eared blonde man in a medieval green tunic. "And here we have Mr. Chatterbox himself: Link!"

"…" Link blinked inquisitively.

"So, any pearls of wisdom you want to share with the audience, Mr. Hero?" Chris asked tauntingly.

"…." Link scowled.

"Good talk, man, good talk," Chris cackled before shoving him aside, letting the next player leave. And just in time, too, because the next player to exit the bus was an overexcited purple dragon whooping and holler. "What up, what up, what up! It's the OG dragon – Spyro!"

"Thanks for the invite, Chris," said Spyro enthusiastically. "It's been so long since I've seen any action."

"Any plans to win the competition?" asked Chris.

"I'm gonna roast them – literally," said Spyro, breathing a puff of fire as an example.

"That's what I love to hear," said Chris as the purple dragon walked off. Coming off the wreckage of a bus next was a tanned girl in a harem girl's outfit with a long purple ponytail. "Shantae, the half-genie hero! I gotta say, out of all our contestants here, you're my favorite."

"Aw, thanks," said Shantae, giggling.

"It almost makes me feel bad about torturing you with life threatening challenges," Chris added.

"That's all – wait, what was that?" asked Shantae, eyes blown out in terror.

"Moving on!" shouted Chris, quickly shoving the half-genie hero aside to make way for a little pink ball with a wide face. "It's everyone favorite nightmare fuel, Kirby! So, little dude, how're you feeling?"

The little pink ball creature turned ominously slow towards Chris, its face locked in a permanent smile that would make clowns cry. In the depths of its cold, lifeless black eyes, Chris could see the souls of millions that this seemingly adorable creature had consumed, entire galaxies swallowed in its bottomless void of a stomach, all screaming for release. The reality show host fear a chill of genuine terror run down his spine as Kirby just kept standing there…menacingly!

"O…k," said Chris slowly, taking three steps back for his own personal safety. Kirby waddled off to join the rest of the cast, and Chris whispered off-screen, "Tell me we have something to take that creep out!"

While was cowering in terror of the gobbler of souls, the next contestant had stepped off the bus, fidgeting anxiously. She was unbelievably beautiful that the instant she stepped out into the open, she had the immediate attention of all the men – from the players to the unpaid interns. Her blonde ponytail glistened like golden threads and she had a super model's figure underneath the skin tight blue bodysuit. She bit her bottom lip anxiously, which only made the men swoon more.

"Samus, happy you could join us," Chris greeted casually; he was a heartless monster after all. "How're you feeling."

"Naked," Samus grumbled. "Why can't I wear my power suit?"

"We can't permit any dangerous weapons on this show," said Chris.

"That man is literally picking his teeth with a bloodied axe!" Samus snapped, pointing at Kratos. "And Link still has his sword."

"All right, you caught me," Chris laughed. "It's because you're sexy hot and having you without the suit will draw all the horny gamers – which makes up sixty-eight percent of the gaming community." Samus gritted her teeth furiously, but walked off, grumbling. "She'll get over it. And speaking of hot blondes, here's Heather Mason!"

Another blonde woman stepped out of the bus, lugging a hefty bag over her shoulder. She took a look at the…eclectic group of players that have already been introduced, only sparing a passing glance at the pink ball of death and the gorilla in a necktie. She then turned her attention to the crappy abandoned company building where they will be sleeping for the duration of the show, sidestepping when one of the windows fell down and smashed on the road beside her.

"…Are we really staying in this craphole," Heather asked Chris.

"No, you will be staying in the craphole," said Chris gleefully. "The producers are giving me a sweet condo with a wicked entertainment system and a Jacuzzi."

"…Eh, I've seen worse," said Heather, shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly as she moved to join the rest of the cast.

"That's a trooper!" said Chris brightly, turning to the camera. "Only known her for sixty seconds, but she already my favorite Heather. Our next player needs no introduction, but I'll give him one anyway. The man, the myth, the mustachioed, block jumping, pipe crawling, plumber himself! It's-a Mario!"

"WA-HOO!" A mustachioed Italian man in a red hat and blue overalls jumped out of the bus. "It's-a me! Mario!"

"I already said that," said Chris, rolling his eyes.

"Thank-a you so much, Chris, for this wonderful opportunity," said Mario, forcibly shaking Chris's hands. "Rest assure that I will be-a the one to leave with that million credit pirze."

"You'd be surprised how many people say that," Chris snickered.

"And once I win-a the million credits," said Mario, a fire burning in his eyes. "I'm-a hunt down those mother(beep)s at SMG4 and rip out their cogliones for making me a retarded internet meme!"

"You are deceptively vicious plumber," said Chris with a wide grin.

"Why do you-a think I kill Bowser all the time?" Mario scoffed. "To rescue-a Peach?"

"While the fans digest that disturbing piece of information," said Chris in sheer delight as the ruthless plumber joined the rest of the cast, "filling out the quota for the 'rough and tough bad boy' role, here's Jak!"

The next player stepped out of the bus lugging a hefty duffle bag that rattled with metallic noises when it moved. He was a tall and brutish-looking man with pointed ears as big as his head and a pair of mismatched goggles strapped to his head. He titled his head back to look at the abandoned company building, then marched up to Chris, who was surprisingly unperturbed by the burly man.

"What the hell is this?" asked Jak, referring to the build as another window fell out. "I was told this was supposed to be a luxury resort, so that I could finally relax from all the crap I went though."

"I never said anything about that," said Chris with a smug grin. "I was very up front about everything – for once. Sounds like someone duped you, bro."

"But who would…?" Jak started until his eyes went wide in realization. "Grr…damn it, Daxter!"

"Looks like someone should sleep with one eye open," Chris laughed as Jak trudged away. Just then, an orange cat-like alien hopped out of the bus, carrying his luggage over his shoulder on a giant wrench. "And coming in from another famous duo, here's Ratchet!"

"Hey, Chris, how's it going?" Ratchet greeted pleasantly, then looked at the ruined building. "Is this where we're staying?"

"Yup," said Chris proudly. "A real dump, huh?"

"Aw, it's not that bad," said Ratchet optimistically, catching the host off-guard. "It just needs a little Lombax elbow grease. I'm sure I can get this place shipshape in no time."

"Great…," said Chris, clearly not pleased with the prospect of the player staying in a better living environment.

As Ratchet walked to join the rest of the introduced players, everyone stepped back with startled yelps when the bus started rattling violently. Though the busted windows, they could see what looked to be an orange tornado making its way across the bus. Once outside, the tornado reached outside, however, it suddenly turned into a giant orange marsupial in jeans and gloves. Then, for some reason, he started dancing.

"All the way from down under," Chris announced with a terrible Australian accent. "It's that lovable orange spaz himself: Crash Bandicoot!" Said bandicoot continued dancing for ten seconds until Chris started getting annoyed. "Okay, stop showing off! We haven't got all day you know!"

Crash laughed and cartoon ran over to the other players, fist bumping his old friend, Spyro. Everyone's attention then shifted to the next player off the bus, which was a humanoid fox in a pilot's outfit and a device over one eye like something out of an old anime.

"Fox McCloud, glad you could join us," Chris greeted him nonchalantly. "Planning on soaring through the competition, are we?"

"Competition?" Fox scoffed cockily, looking over the players. "Please, I could dust these amateurs in my sleep. One of them is literally eating a trash can."

Everyone looked over their shoulders at Kirby, who had indeed found a trash can on the side of the road and was halfway through swallowing it whole.

"I think we found the villain of the season," Chris chortled delightfully.

The cocky fox joined the crowd of players, standing next to Kratos. That was until the God of War rumbled at him and Fox "discreetly" switched places with Sly, who was startled by the sudden shift leaned away from Kratos with a sheepish smile.

And while the talking animals were avoiding certain death, the next contestant on the show stepped off the bus. A woman with hair like blazing fire dressed like a tribesman armed with a hunters bow and mechanical spear. She took a moment to look at the other players and touched the silver triangle attached to her temple for reasons no one was able to understand.

"Aloy, welcome to the show," Chris greeted casually. "So, how does it feel to be in real civilization for a change?"

The woman called Aloy looked back at the building as the front doors suddenly collapsed.

"…Not that much different, to be honest," said Aloy honestly.

Aloy walked around Chris and made her way to join the rest of the player, not paying attention to where she was stepping. As ashamed as she is to admit, Aloy failed to notice the crack in the road and got her foot caught, tumbling forward with a surprised yelp. Before she hit the ground, however, Samus lunged forward and caught the tribal woman in her arms. Aloy found herself staring up at the taller woman, surprised by Samus's muscle tone underneath her skintight suit.

"You okay?" asked Samus earnestly.

"Uh…yeah…," Aloy managed to mumble out, mentally kicking herself for such a half-assed response. Several players were snickering behind their hands, some even making swooning gestured, which Aloy noticed. The redhead immediately stood up straight and marched to the furthest end of the line away from Samus, much to the bounty hunter's confusion.

All the while, Chris crouched down to greet the newest player that just exited the crappy metal death trap, which was the strangest guest thus far next to Kirby. The creature was a small yellow mouse that barely came up to Chris's knee with bright red cheeks and a zig-zag tail. After stepping off the bus, the little monster let out an excited "Pika-Pika!"

"Pikiachu, little buddy, welcome to Total Drama Gamers," said Chris, genuinely enthusiastic as he fish bumped the little mouse.

"Pika-Pika," said Pikachu, returning the fist bump.

"What do you think you chances of winning are?" asked Chris.

"Pika-Pika, Pikachu," said Pikachu, nodding sagely.

"Interesting," said Chris. "And what's you opinion on the modern youth and their unhealthy addiction to technology?"

"Pika, Pika-pikachu," said Pikachu very seriously, making many gestures. "Pika-Pi, Pika Pikachu. Pikachu Pika-Pi, Pi-Pika Pikachu!"

"Very insightful," said Chris, nodding in agreement.

"…Do you understand anything they're saying?" DK whispered to Ratchet.

"My universal translator seems to be on the fritz," said Ratchet, smacking a handheld device he pulled out fruitlessly.

Chris stood up and watched Pikachu joined the rest of the cast before turning his attention to the next contestant exiting the bus. A grizzled man with parted white hair in a long scarlet trench coat seemed to have forgone any luggage and had brought a whole pizza instead. He took a bite out of a slice and ended up spilling hot cheese and sauce down his front, making a dissatisfied groaning noise. Several members of the Playstation community shook their heads at the white-haired man just brushed it off, leaving a stain on his shirt.

"And this rugged half-devil is Dante," Chris introduced.

"Oh, hey, Chris," said Dante, stuffing the pizza back in the box and shaking Chris's hand. The reality show host grimaced when they pulled away and found his hand covered in sticky cheese. "Say, is there any chance I can get an advance on that prize money?"

"There is no 'advance'," said Chris, wiping his hand on Dante's coat. "You have to win it."

"Well, it's just that I have some…outstanding debts I need to pay off," said Dante with a hopeful tone.

"Go join the rest of the losers," said Chris firmly. Date groaned and walked off to stand beside Kratos, offering the God of War a slice of pizza. Surprisingly, Kratos accepted, and Sly managed to slip one without Dante noticing.

Coming off the bus next was a young woman with unique long hair that was red on one side and blue on the other with different colored eyes to match. In addition to her luggage, she was also carrying a round creature that looked like a blue-and-white dog under her arm.

"Look, Sommie, this is where we'll be staying," said the multi-colored woman; the creature called Sommie barked enthusiastically. "It's…something."

"Alear, welcome to the show," Chris greeted the newest player. "I hear you're the newest representative for the Fire Emblem series. That must put a lot of pressure on you."

"It's not that bad," said Alear brightly. "I'm looking forward to getting along with everyone and having a good time."

"Oh, you sweet summer child," said Chris sarcastically, petting Alear's head, much to the warrior's confusion. Alear let out a startled yelp when Chris pulled her aside and greeted the new contestant off the bus: a literal angel. "Pit, welcome aboard."

"Thanks for having me, Chris," said Pit the Angel. "It's nice to finally be recognized for something other than Smash Bros."

"Yeah, no, that's the only reason you're here," said Chris mockingly. "You're one of the most forgettable characters Nintendo has, next to Ice Climbers."

"I know…," said Pit sulkily, dragging his feet to join the rest of the crew.

The next player off the bus was struggling to drag their bags through the door, which was understandable considering it was bulging with all sorts of ink-based weapons. She looked like a normal tan-skinned teenager…except for the pink octopus tentacles on her head. After one good tug, the octo girl successfully removed her bag and dragged it across the ground.

"Agent 8, good to have you," said Chris, taking note of the overstuffed bag. "I see you're well prepared."

"It's like they always say in the Octarian Army," said Agent 8 cheerfully, giving a stiff salute. "Always be ready to mercilessly splat the enemy with extreme prejudice."

"I knew I had a good feeling about you," said Chris. "It almost makes up for not getting the new 3 on the show."

As Agent 8 dragged her bag of weapons away, the camera panned over to the next player to step off the bus. Although, 'stepping off' might not have been the right word – they were floating. Another dark-skinned woman with flowing blonde hair and bright-red eye, the newcomer effortlessly levitated her baggage over her head as if gravity no longer applied to her.

"Welcome to Total Drama – " Chris started until he was rudely cut off by an excited squeal from behind.

"Kat!" Shantae waved excitedly.

"Shantae!" the woman called Kat shouted ecstatically. She tossed her luggage at Chris, knocking him to the ground, and shot over to hug the half-genie. "Oh my gosh, I didn't know you'd be here!"

"Me neither!" said Shantae.

"You two know each other?" asked Sly curiously.

"We did a lot of fanwork back in the day," Shantae explained to him, then went back to Kat. "Is it true that you're getting an animated movie?"

"Well…nothing is definitive," said Kat sheepishly. "We really took a hit after Ratchet and Clank bombed." Said Lombax crossed his arms and huffed. "And then there was Sly's movie getting shelved…but I'm optimistic – "

"Excuse me!" shouted Chris, shoving Kat's baggage off. "I'm the one everyone should be paying attention to! Anyway, following up we have Isabella!"

An adorable little blonde dog-person hopped off the bus, carrying with her a pair of adorable little suitcases.

"Wow, so this is what the human world looks like," said Isabella with a happy smile. "…It sucks."

"That it does, Isabella," chortled Chris.

"Oh, hey, Chris," Isabella greeted the host. "Glad to be here. So when do I get to murder people?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, there will be no murdering on this show!" said Chris, surprisingly stern on this point. "We don't need that kind of lawsuit."

"Can't I do a little murder?" asked Isabella sweetly.

"Who picked these freaks?" Chris stage whispered to the camera while Isabella hopped over to the rest of the players, who gave the adorable pup a wide berth. "Oh, right, I did."

The second to last member of the cast stepped off the bus carrying a duffle bag over his shoulder, giving the area and once over. He was a strikingly handsome man with a smoldering stare and (much to Samus's ire)was packing heat in his holsters.

"Leon Scott Kennedy, welcome to Total Drama Gamers," said Chris.

"It's a pleasure to be here, Chris," said Leon, politely shaking the host's hand.

"You know, the only reason you're here instead of Chris or Jill is because you're ridiculously handsome," said Chris plainly.

"Really?" asked Leon.

He them did a slow motion hair flip, which turned the background pink and fuzzy while sensual music played. The other contestants stared open-mouthed at the handsome man, completely enthralled by his good looks. Dante dropped his pizza on the ground, Isabella and Pikachu panted like they were in heat, and Kat dropped out of the air and landed on Shantae, both of them swooning. The only person unaffected was Aloy, who quirked her brow strangely.

"Okay, okay, we get it, show off!" Chris immediately cut in, shoving Leon aside and cutting off the sexy music. "And finally, the original video game eye candy here from the Tomb Raider series, it's Lara Croft!"

The last contestant – a British woman with a firm muscle tone and hair pulled back into a ponytail – hopped off the bus, taking a quick look at the building, then dropped her bag on the ground. She kneeled down and started ruffling through her belongings when Chris approached her from behind.

"Hey, Lara, welcome to – "

That was as far as he went before he made the mistake of touching Lara on the shoulder. Before he knew what happened, Chris found himself shoved against the bus with his arm being twisted behind his back by the archeologist.

"Who sent you?" Lara spat wildly. "Was it Trinity? The Illuminati? Elvis Presley?"

"I'm…the host…," Chris groaned out.

"Oh…pardon," said Lara apologetically, releasing him and letting Chris drop to the ground.

"I like her," Dante muttered to Kratos, who rolled his eyes exasperatedly.

"Well, that…unpleasant," said Chris, frowning while dusting himself off. "But now that everyone is accounted for, we're officially ready to begin season three! Who's pumped?" Several of the contestants whooped and punched their fists in excitement. "That's the spirit! Everyone grab your things and meet me on the twenty-sixth floor in twenty minutes!"

At that exact moment, a helicopter magically appeared out of nowhere, kicking up dust and trash in the contestants' faces. The pilot dropped a rope ladder, which Chris climbed halfway before it took off.

"You may want to take the stairs!" Chris shouted down at the contestants. "The elevators are temporarily out of order!"

The video game stars looked extremely pissed at the reality show host as he was literally carried to the top. The players turned towards the wrecked building, many exasperating over the long trek ahead of them.


Chris tapped his foot impatiently in the middle of the lobby as he checked his watch again. He told them to be present in twenty minutes and it was twenty-one minutes now. Honestly, some people can be so lazy….

The TV host perked up when the stairway door burst open and all twenty-two burst out in a giant pile with Mario, unfortunately, being on the bottom. Kat was among the few who were not sweaty and winded because she floated the entire way up, carrying Shantae as he passenger, as well as Pikachu, who literally hitched a ride on Kratos's shoulder, and Pit, who came flying in through the broken window.

"You losers sure took your sweet time," said Chris insultingly.

"We had to climb twenty-eight flights of stairs to get here," said Jak, growling in frustration.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, they fixed the elevators ten minutes ago," Chris revealed lightheartedly.

"…I'm gonna kill this asshole," Leon threatened.

"I know how to hide a body," Isabella informed sweetly.

"Now that all the victims – sorry, I mean, players – are present," said Chris, snickering in a way that meant it wasn't a slip of the tongue. "Welcome to season three of the Total Dramaverse series: Total Drama Gamers. This season, we'll be capturing all the hilarious chaos in this crappy, potentially life-threatening abandoned video game company. Be careful where you step. Trust me, that last step is a doozy."

"What company did this building belong to?" asked Agent 8, raising her hand politely.

"Nobody important," said Chris while subtly kicking a giant green "X" sign through a hole in the floor. "You'll be spending the next ten weeks here, competing against each other in challenges, and for rewards. And since this is a gaming studio, all challenges will be based on video games – some of which you might even know.

"Is there a shoot game?" asked Isabella eagerly. "Please tell me I can shoot people!"

"Please tell me you won't let her shoot people," asked Agent 8 pleadingly.

"I'm starting to reconsider it," said Chris, equally terrified of the adorable pup. "By winning challenges, each of you will have a chance to win the ultimate winner, winner chicken dinner – "

"We're having chicken for dinner?" Spyro gasped excitedly.

"No, and don't interrupt me – ever!" said Chris firmly, poking the purple dragon's nose to emphasize his point. "As I was saying, all of you will fight for the chance to win the big bucks: one – million – credits!"

"Yes! Bring it on!" said Pit enthusiastically.

"I've never earned a million legally before," said Sly humorously. "This oughta be fun."

"Oh, it will be, my sticky-fingered friend," said Chris. "Like all seasons, one team will win and the other team will watch one of their own make their way down the dread Steps of Failure to the Elevator of Losers." He gestured to the elevator doors to their right, which were slightly open and the light inside was flickering. "Those who ride the Elevator of Losers are immediately ejected from Total Drama Gamers and cane never come back. Unless I feel like it," he added with a cackle.

"And, of course, it wouldn't be Total Drama if there wasn't some place for you to dump your deepest darkest secrets to the viewing public," he continued, gesturing to single wooden door on the left side of the room. "So you're be dishing the dirt in our new office confessional!"


CONFESSIONALS

Heather: (Taking a seat on the slightly worn seat behind the cracked desk) Don't know what I was expecting by coming here, but it certainly wasn't this. Risking our lives that could collapse if you sneeze wrong? Luckily, I'm used to fight for my life in a crappy environment.

BZZT

Fox: (Kicking his feet up, hands behind his head) Am I worried about the competition? Nah! I've fought literal space monsters before. I already know all the tricks of everyone from Nintendo, and most of the guys from the other company don't look like too tough. Except maybe that Kratos guy.

BZZT

Jak: Still pretty pissed Daxter tricked me into signing up. But, since I'm here anyway, I might as well try to win. And if there's one thing I'm good at, it's winning.

BZZT

Kirby: (Stares unblinkingly into the camera, looking at you, waiting for the moment you drop your guard to devour your soul)


The reality show host lead the twenty-four players down the hall from the lobby to a room that was slightly bigger than the rest of the offices. Inside were a dozen tables in varying states of disrepair, some of which had mismatched legs, were stuck together with duct tape, or was slanted in one direction. At the front of the room was a long table with sets of bowls, plates, and utensils that were (thankfully) clean.

"And this is the break room," Chris announced with a wide sweeping gesture. "Here is where you will be spending you meal times. Or if you want to beat the crud out of someone afrter finding out they stabbed you in the back."

"Does that happen a lot?" asked Alear, concerned.

"I hope so," said Chris, rubbing his hands with an evil smile.

"And who's-a making the food?" asked Mario, his mustache twitching in a frown. "You?"

"Do I look like I do manual labor?" said Chris, acting insulted. "That duty falls on this season's guest assistant. And I think she's my favorite one so far."

"Where is she?" asked Sly as he and everyone else looked around.

"I'll call her fight now," said Chris in a sing-song voice. "Oh, Senti…."

"YATTA!" The players jumped in different directions with frightened screams as the new voice appeared directly in the middle of their group. Standing there was the greatest game character to ever be created in the history of the world (and not because she brainwashed the author to write that). "Now that's how you make an entrance."

"Where did you come from?" Spyro yelled.

"Pika-Pika!" Pikachu scowled.

"Everyone, it is my pleasure to introduce this seasons guest assistant," said Chris eagerly as the woman joined his side. "Say hello to Senti."

"Hey, losers, I'm the Great Herrscher of Sentience!" Senti announced proudly. "This is my third appearance in a story written byb the same author because I'm super awesome! My special talents include making viral memes, breaking the fourth wall, singing acapella, and smashing people's faces with bricks!"

"What was that last – " Ratchet started to say until Senti suddenly broke a brick across his face.

"I love this show," said Chris with the biggest smile possible.


After waking up Ratchet and making sure he didn't have a concussion, Chris led the players to another hallway that branched off in two directions. One hallway was haphazardly painted red and had a sign with a giant red "N" hanging over head. The other hallway was a messy shade of blue and had a giant blue "P."

"These hallways lead to the rooms where each team will be sleeping," said Chris, indicating the two signs. "And even though most of you are adults, you still have to follow the rules: men and women will be sleeping in separate rooms. And no 'funny business' or you're getting the boot. This is a family show."

"What are the teams?" asked Isabella.

"Normally we would pick random names out of a hat and divide teams up," Chris explained. "But we decided to do something different this season. A classic clash of the companies – Nintendo vs. Playstation. When I call your name, go stand over here."

He gestured to the side under the giant "P" sign. Chris pulled out a crumpled sheet of paper from his pocket, coughing importantly into his fist.

"The first team is…," Chris paused for dramatic effect. "Crash, Heather, Kat, Spyro, Lara, Jak, Leon, Dante, Sly, Aloy, Ratchet, and Kratos."

As their names were called, the players moved one-by-one to stand underneath the blue sign. Crash and Spyro bumped fists again, excited to be on the same team together, while Lara looked annoyed with Dante, who was trying to smooze up with her. Heather looked away shyly when Leon offered a kind smile and Aloy and Kratos sized each other up, then nodded respectfully to one another. Kat looked visably disappointed she was on the same team as Shantae, but perked up slightly when she talked to Sly and Ratchet, who were old friends from the All-Stars days.

"As of today, you're name will be…the Playstation Platypuses!" Chris announce proudly.

"Actually, the proper plural for Platypus is – " Ratchet started to say before Senti threw another brick at his face.

"Thanks, Senti!" Chris shouted down the hall.

"No problem!" Senti called back.

"As for the rest of you…," Chris continued. "Mario, DK, Link, Fox, Pikachu, Kirby, Pit, Samus, Eight, Isabella, Alear, and Shantae. Step over here, if you would."

The Nintendo cast was more than happy to oblige, almost all of them looking enthusiastic to be working together. It was in that moment that the Playstation Platypuses saw the critical flaw in their team selections. While they rarely crossed over, the Nintendo stars knew each other regularly thanks to the Smash Bros games, which meant their teamwork was bound to be exceptional. The only exclusion was Eight, Alear, and Shantae.

"You will henceforth be called…the Nintendo Newts!" Chris announced.

"Wait, does Shantae even count as a Nintendo character?" Fox pointed out.

"Yeah, isn't she with that Wayforward studio?" said DK.

"Well…um…," Shantae stammered, playing with her fingers uneasily.

"Her first game was on the Nintendo Gameboy," Chris informed, "and she appeared in Smash Bros – "

"As a Mii skin," Fox muttered.

"Plus, she's awesome!" said Chris firmly. "So she's here to stay."


CONFESSIONALS

Shantae: I really am an outsider in this team, aren't I? Well, I guess that just means I have to work twice as hard to not give them a reason to vote me off. Hopefully.


The next stop on the tour was the screening room, where Senti was waiting with a backdrop of Total Drama Action's award ceremony holding a plate of dented Chris statues.

"Teams who lose challenges will have to make it through our dramatic Gamer Award Ceremony," Chris announced with a flourish. "Where all but one loser will receive the coveted Gilden Chris Award."

"Why are they all…beat up?" asked Aloy.

"Definitely not because we're recycling them from an old season," said Chris, laughing out loud.

"But we totally are," said Senti.


CONFESSIONALS

Dante: And they call me a cheapskate.


"And now that our tour is out of the way, it's time to start the first challenge of the season!" Chris announced excitedly.

"Already?" said Shantae.

"Come on!" Heather complained.

"We haven't even got a chance to unpack," Leon pointed out.

"…." Link made a rude gesture that was pixilated in the final cut.

"It's for the best," said Chris with a devilish grin. "Two of you won't need to bother, because we're kicking off the season with…a double elimination!"

"A double elimination?!" Agent 8 squeaked.

"You mean two members of a team will be kicked out right away?" said Isabella. "That hardly seems fair."

"You're right, puppers," said Chris, still smiling like the black-hearted demon he was. "That's why, no matter who wins the challenge, both teams will be sending one player home tonight!"

"WHAT?!" both teams screamed together in shock and outrage.

"Who will be the first losers to take the dread Elevator of Losers?" asked Chris, turning to the camera, "and who will have what it takes to take home the ultimate grand prize. Find out on the next thrilling installment of TOTAL – DRAMA – GAMERS!"


Contestants Remaining: 24

Playstation Platypuses: Crash, Heather, Kat, Spyro, Lara, Jak, Leon, Dante, Sly, Aloy, Ratchet, Kratos

Nintendo Newts: Mario, DK, Link, Fox, Pikachu, Kirby, Pit, Samus, Eight, Isabella, Alear, Shantae