Demi-fiend's house, Vortex World
"Ugh... Why do I hee have to go with you guys ho?", Demi-fiend's Black Frost, Hee-ho, complained as Pixie fitted a green jester collar around his neck.
"Because," Demi-fiend started, "everyone who's related to Lucifer was invited to the Christmas party, and technically you count since you ingested the Satan magatama, and Satan is his brother, or something."
"That's a hee lotta mental gymnastics ho."
"Probably. But its an excuse to get you out of the house, and I'm taking it." Demi-fiend said, looking at the two pants he had in the mirror. "Pixie, should I use the long Santa pants or the short ones?"
She paused in her dressing of the Black Frost. "Umm... shorts. I know how much you like showing off your tattoos. Plus it'll be like a whole-new take on Christmas fashion!" Demi-fiend nodded and went to another room to heed her advice.
"Hmph! I hee think we look stu- hey ho! What are you doing!?" he cried as Pixie yanked his hat off his head.
"Purple isn't a Christmas color Hee-ho." She went over to the dresser and pulled out a green elf hat. "This tho..." She plopped it onto his bald head and looked to examine her work. "Ooooh we're gunna look so cuute! You get to be the elf and me and Naoki get to be Mister and Misses Clause!", The fairy squealed, doing a little flip in the air.
The Black Frost wasn't impressed. "Man hee this looks lame! My style has ho been ruined!"
"Like it was ever good to begin with." Demi-fiend snarked as he returned from dressing himself, now outfitted in Santa shorts and a hat. "Now come on, we'll be leaving in a few minutes."
"No way!", Hee-ho refused, then he ran out of the room.
"Grr, come back here!" Demi-fiend ordered. Thankfully he didn't have to chase his minion far, as he found Cu Chulain holding him by the collar, suspending him in mid-air. "Hee let me go you ho!"
"No." He denied bluntly. "You will accompany our master on his outing and you will like it."
"No! Hee's not my dad, he can't make me do an-hee-ything!"
"Yeah I'm not your dad; I'm your boss, and if you don't comply I'm cutting off your pay. Aka your allowance you always beg me for!"
"Hee ho Nooo! How will I buy the new Fortnite Battle Pass!?" He looked around and saw Parvati observing the commotion. "Parvat-hee, help me ho!"
Parvati shook her head. "I know this is hard to accept my child, but I believe master is taking the proper course of action. You don't have many friends outside of us and this can be an opportunity to branch out and step outside your comfort zone. Additionally," she let a small smile grace her face. "You do look quite cute in that outfit."
"Stup-hee-d more like!"
"Nuh uh!", Pixie fervently refuted, then gestured to her Santa themed leotard. "I look a-mazing! If you keep this rigamarole up you'll be on the naughty list buster!"
Hee-ho looked ready continue his temper tantrum, but Titania swooped in and shoved a cut watermelon into the frost's melon shaped mouth, silencing him.
"Mmph! Mhmmm!"
"Ugh, finally some quiet. Now you should be on your way darlings, don't want to be late to the party, now do you?"
Demi-fiend nodded his thanks and took the frost from Cu Chulainn's hands. "Ok, we'll probably be back by midnight, so make sure Titania and Girimehkala don't kill each other and that a certain someone doesn't destroy everything in the house trying to use a spear."
Arahabaki bristled. "[Bro it was one time. Its not easy relearning how to use a spear.]"
"That's the thing, you don't. You don't have hands anymore, just let it go."
"But-"
"No buts! Now lets go Pixie."
"Don't forget the bag of presents Naoki! We can't be the clauses without presents."
"Right." He grabbed the bag of presents by the door, passing by Cu Chulainn kneeling while he left with his entourage. "It will be done master..."
Once the fiend was gone, Arahabaki turned to Chu Chulainn. "[So... Cu...]"
Cu Chulainn held his spear close to him. "Don't even think about it."
"[Aw...]"
Kether Castle Dining Room, The Expanse
"Well, if this isn't the most awkward gathering I've experienced I don't know what is.", Sho commented on the tense atmosphere of the dining room, mainly stemming from the two women, Aoi and Lilith, sending death glares to each other across the table. It contrasted with the otherwise festive energy the room exhibited, complete with a giant Christmas tree and a few couches behind the grand tables.
"You're telling me." Tadano agreed. He then groaned when he felt arms snake around his shoulders.
"That's no way to talk about this family gathering Tad.", Luisa admonished, causing Tadano to make a face. "Please do not call me that."
"Agreed. Its weird and creepy.", Satan, in his human form, butted in.
Luisa pretended to look around the room for someone. "Hmm..."
"What are you doing?"
Luisa snorted. "I am trying to find who asked. It certainly was not me."
"Why did you even invite him? No offense." Tadano said to Satan, who shrugged. "You two hate each other."
"Oh believe me, he's one of the last people I want here. However, Aleph let him come along and I couldn't refuse him." Hearing his name, Aleph looked up from his word search puzzle and waved. She waved back and continued. "And besides, I thought that couples used pet names all the time?"
"Sure, but we, are not a couple."
"How can you say that when our daughter is only a table away?", Luisa acted offended, referring to the kids table where Aleph, Alex, Mirai, and the other "children" were seated.
"1, why are they at a kids table, most of them aren't kids, and 2, I don't buy her being my daughter.", Tadano said, giving Alex the stink eye.
Hiroko leaned in to speak on the first point. "It was Aleph's idea. He wanted all the kids of people here to sit at a separate table, to emulate the stereotypical Chistmas dinner and stuff."
"That's uh... an interesting idea."
"Yeah... he literally didn't get to have a childhood though, so I don't mind granting him this small pleasure."
"And on the second point, she is your daughter.", Luisa insisted.
"How? Does you phasing through me like a ghost suddenly take my semen away and allow you to concieve?"
"Uh... yes?"
Tadano gave her an unconvinced looked. "Yeah, sure."
"Can you please stop hating me? What happened should be water under the bridge by now.", Alex pleaded.
"Water under the bridge?! Bitch you tried to kill me!"
"It was only a few times.", she added to make it seem less bad, to no avail. "Also Jimenez, Gore, and Zelenin tried to kill you and you still like them."
"Yeah because they didn't have dumbass reasons for it. You do."
"Like what?!"
"It shouldn't even be possible for you to time travel considering both law and chaos get rid of technology in their endings, and in neutral where you do have the technology to do it, you have absolutely no reason to."
"Well I could just uh... use magic to time travel?"
Tadano scoffed. "Yeah they sure did mention the magic that was capable of doing that."
"And I definitely had a good reason to kill you on neutral. You stopping the first Schwarzwelt made humanity complacent, and so summoned another Schwarzwelt."
"So killing me, the guy who stopped the Schwarzwelt and so allowed humanity to survive in the first place, even if it was to a point where they stupidly just summoned another one, would still save them?"
"...yes?"
"Right... I see that this one didn't come out right Luisa."
"She didn't come out right either.", Satan once again spoke up to hate.
Luisa snarled. "Are you just here purely to annoy me?", she rhetorically asked, to which Satan simply replied, "Yes."
Tadano face-palmed as Luisa and Satan continued their bickering.
"Hey man, it could be worse.", Sho supplied. "You could be stuck in an eternal love triangle and with a bunch of reincarnated kids."
"Kids?"
"Yeah like-"
"You know... I'm daddy's favorite... just saying.", a Lilim bragged at the kids table to Naoya and Kazuya, neither of whom particularly cared. "How interesting..." Naoya boredly replied, his cousin beside him also not giving the demon any real attention, focusing on playing on his DS.
"Ugh, them. And stop calling me that!", Sho yelled over at his Lilim, who just stuck out her tongue.
"Why is a lilim..?"
"Yeah its this weird thing she does. I recruited her early on and she thinks that me being her mom's ex makes me her dad or step-dad or something. Naturally being a Lilim she has to sexualize everything and now she always calls me-"
"Daddy!", she called out teasingly.
"Stop calling me that!", he shouted in retaliation.
Lilim pouted. "You're no fun. Maybe if you chose a partner with a... I don't know.. a little more personality... you would learn to loosen up a little.", she said, not so subtly glancing in Lilith and Aoi's direction.
"We already discussed this young lady. No. Keep asking and I'm sending you to the COMP.", he threatened.
"Yes sir.", Lilim moodily saluted, but nonetheless turned back to her one-sided conversation.
Hiroko smirked. "Looks like you're accepting the parental role better than you think.
"Shut up. I just got used to her is all. Those two only the other hand.", he gestured to the reincarnated brothers. "I'm not sure how to deal with. We just kinda ignore each other's existence. Does the bible even say what relationship Adam had with his kids?"
"No, but the bible isn't exactly known for its focus on character relationships."
"Well, some dad I am.", he mumbled, taking a swig from his drink.
"What does Aoi think about this?"
"She uh, doesn't really react to it." He then tapped her on the shoulder, breaking her staring match with Lilith. "Huh?"
"Hey Aoi, what do you think of our convoluted family tree."
"Oh well... what do you think?"
"I think its weird."
"Ok then its weird.", she mindlessly copied.
"Wh- bu- That was what I said!"
"What you think is what I think." She dreamily replied.
"*cough* Zero personality *cough*", Lilim uttered, hiding her words between coughs.
"Shut up!"
Outside Kether Castle
"*huff* My f-hee-t *huff* are killing me *huff* ho.", Hee-ho panted, dragging his feet to the castle wall. "Why the *huff* hee-ll did Luc-hee-fer not *huff* put a terminal in his *huff* castle, ho?"
"Yeah well, *huff* never say the lord of chaos is a smart guy. Cuz he isn't. *huff*" Demi-fiend stumbled forward, fatigued from the long journey without a terminal in sight. "Whose idea was it to make the closest terminal 3 dungeons ago?"
"Well, personally," Pixie began. "I feel great!"
"Cuz you just sat on his hee shoulder the whole time you lazy ho-", he criticized, but at the look on Demi-fiend's face made him try to remedy his sentence. "-ho ho ho! Thats like Santa right?"
"Yep! But you're an elf right now, so you gotta act the part, got it?", Pixie said.
"What do elves say hee ho?"
"They say nothing because any more yapping is going to get them an ass whooping. Now come on, we're late enough as is."
"Grrr, stupid hee ho...", Hee-ho insulted under his breath as he followed his boss to the entrance. What they found however was a surprise. There was a long line full of a large assortment of people, with a blonde robot serving as the bouncer to the castle at the front of the line.
"The hell? What is Aigis doing here?"
"Aw hee-ll naw! I didn't walk all this hee way just to wait in a line ho!" And with that, the Black Frost stalked forward, cutting through everyone in line.
"Hey what do you think you're doing!", a random demon protested, but with a wave of his hand the Black Frost encased him in ice, proceeding to do it to anyone else that had a problem with his line ditching. "Well this is one way to do it.", Demi-fiend nonchalantly said, following after his irate subordinate. "Hee hee, we're spreading the Christmas spirit!", Pixie cheered.
"Hoy, what do you mean I'm not on the list?!", they heard as they approached the front of the line. "You are not on the list.", Aigis said plainly. "This indicates you are not welcome to attend this event. Leave."
"Hold on, Hikar- err, Lucifer is a something of a companion of mine. Surely this is some sort of mistake?"
"I suggest you take up your complaints with our receptionist. She can point you in the right direction.", she robotically stated, motioning to the Gemori that was loudly talking on the phone, paying the disgruntled line in front of her no mind.
"If you won't allow me through you may have to behold my de-", Walter began, slowly moving his hand towards his gauntlet, but was pushed aside by Hee-ho. "Ugh, we're finally hee-re." He looked at Aigis. "Let me in! I'm starv-hee-ng!"
"State your name."
"Well, some may know me as the Emp-hee-ror of Kabukic-ho... and others may rec-hee-gnize the name-"
"Hoy, demon! I was in the line first!", Walter interrupted the egotistical snowman.
"Shut up hee ho! I'm trying to introduce myself! Go be a hee loser somewhere else ho."
"We shall see about that. Agi!", he shot his hands forward to cast the spell, only for it to rebound back into his face, sending him screaming with his hair on fire. "AHH!"
"Hee hahahahha ho ho ho!", Hee-ho laughed at the Samurai's misery. "Maybe you should go back to school and learn that Black Frosts repel fire, stup-hee-d!"
Demi-fiend and Pixie looked on in indifference at the samurai's flailing. "Hmph, you would think he would've learned his lesson after Minotaur." He turned to Aigis. "Anyway, what are you doing here?"
"That is on a need-to-know basis, and you do not need to know. Now state your name."
Demi-fiend raised an eyebrow. "Its me. You know... We've met before."
"State your name.", Aigis repeated. Demi-fiend scowled and no doubt would've continued prodding for her recognition of him, but Pixie cut in.
"Pixie the Fairy, Black "Hee-ho" Frost, and Naoki Kashima the Demi-Fiend.", she smoothly recited.
The robot scanned the list and nodded. "You are on the list. Please proceed."
"Oh.", Demi-fiend uttered, walking through the open door. "Ya gotta rein in that macho energy sometimes big guy.", Pixie lectured her boyfriend. "Heh yeah, sorry about that."
Luisa took notice of the fiend's arrival. "Ah Demi-fiend, welcome to the party. You never were one for being on time, eh?"
"No thanks to this guy we weren't." Demi-fiend snarked, looking at Hee-ho, who just folded his arms in a pout. "Its called being late in style, bub!", Pixie said. "If you disrespect us we'll see to it that you guys won't get any of these presents!"
"Yeah, what she said. Ho ho ho and shit.", he said lamely, waving his bag of presents around.
"You don't make a very convincing Santa."
"Whatever. By the way, we saw Walter coping on the way in. What's up with that?"
"Ah, him. Yes well, seeing as I invited Hitonari here, I didn't want to make him jealous by inviting another one who is seeking my affections."
"Trust me, I wouldn't have minded.", Tadano dryly assured her.
A voice then penetrated through the door. "Hoy, Lucifer! I know you're here! Why aren't I on the list?! First you stop replying to my messages, and now this? What did I do to deserve this!"
"Back away from the door, or else I will have to forcibly remove you from the premises.", a robotic voice echoed out.
"Hoy, you can't hold me back! This is the power of Chaos! Behold my demo-"
"Activating Orgia Mode!"
"AH!"
A scream, followed by a thud, sounded out before there was once again silence on the other side of the door.
"It is just like you to ghost people once you get bored of them Lucifer."
"Silence Satan! So yes I may have chosen to not respond to some of his texts, but what of it. He was the one who thought our relationship was more than it actually was."
"You fused with him! That goes beyond any insignificant fling you could've had."
"Yes, and that fusion resulted in an abomination that looked like a depressed alien with a tumor! I'm lucky I didn't get a terminal illness once it was over."
"Bah, you don't see me and Seth quarreling just because our true form has 6 breasts."
"And, and, he was certainly messing around with other women! Isn't that right Lilith?"
Lilith frowned. "Please don't drag me into this Lord Lucifer. I prefer not to remember when I was a half-spider thing. I had the lilims deal with him most of the time anyway."
Lilim spoke up. "While I wasn't there, I heard from the other lilims that his... package... isn't very impressive... if you know what I mean. Same with Tetsuo, the nerd daddy always hangs with."
"Seems to be a trend among chaos supporters, eh Aleph?", Satan laughed, with Aleph trying not to laugh along with him and Luisa snarling. "Silence!"
Hiroko rolled her eyes. "Children..."
"Another thing," Demi-fiend added before the conversation could escalate, "Why is Aigis the bouncer?"
"Oh that." Luisa waved him off. "Seeing as how her lover(s?) are here, she was determined to offer up her services to protect them."
"Huh?", he questioned, looking over the room before landing his eyes onto the twin protagonists of Persona 3, who were engrossed in their food.
"*gulp* I'm gonna win *gulp* Minato!", Hamuko yelled between shoving the food into her gullet.
"*munch* *munch* I don't care.", Minato calmly responded, though he did not slow in his hunger induced fervor.
"Emo?! Didn't you survive an assassination attempt just a few weeks ago? What are you doing here and not in the underground ATLUS bunker with reinforced steel?"
Hamuko paused in her eating to answer him. "I had the same idea, but I guess to be fair we're pretty safe from any further attempts here, what with the devil, his (or her I'm not sure how his whole shapeshifting thing works) demon army, and our own personal terminator here to protect us in a fortified castle. And... its free food. One of the only things to get this emotionally stunted idiot excited." She jabbed her thumb in Minato's direction, who waved a little at Naoki without stopping his pig-out.
"Ok, aside from that though, why were you even invited in the first place? Last time I checked you guys aren't related to Lucifer."
"Our ultimate persona is Messiah, and the Messiah is the son of God, and Lucifer is a creation of God, so we qualified for the invite."
"What kind of mental gymnastics is this? Wouldn't that qualify anyone since we're all children of God or whatever?"
Hamuko just shrugged. Minato looked over at her. "*chomp* You know, you're going to lose this eating competition if you keep pausing."
"I thought you didn't care."
"I don't... Just saying." Then he continued munching down on his food, making Hamuko growl. "You're on! *chomp* *chomp*"
"Well whatever. Hee-ho go sit at the table with the kids."
Black Frost looked up at Demi-fiend with indignation. "What? Why?"
"Cuz you count as a kid, and we're running out of seats at the table here."
"Just give it to me hee ho."
"No."
"Hee ho! Some Santa you are! What hee happened to the season of giving ho?"
"I got something to give you right now actually." Then Demi-fiend reached into his present bag and brought out a lump of coal. "Here you go."
"Grrr, screw you!" Hee-ho marched off to the kids table and seated himself between Kazuya and Mirai.
"Hm?", Kazuya hummed in curiosity "Frosty? What are you doing here?"
"That guy? We look completely-", Black Frost tried to deny any resemblance to his fellow Black Frost, but Mirai jumped in as well. "Wow, its a Jack Frost!... Except you're black now. Did you get a pile of coal from Santa or something? That doesn't sound very nice."
"No I- Hmm, actually...", Hee-ho slowly said, a plan of revenge building into his mind. "Yeah I did! That Santa wannabe is a jerk!"
"Santa? That's just big brother Demi-fiend though, right?"
"Yeah, but hee doesn't act like it ho!" He glared at the Demi-fiend who was laughing at a joke Pixie made at the table, and lowered his voice. "Hee drags me to this boring-ass party, he threatens to take my mon-hee away ho, steps all over my hee rights, its unforgivable hee ho! You've gotta help me get back at him!"
"How?"
"By ruining this dumb part-hee for him ho! He wanted an elf, but what hee really created was the snowman who ho stole Christmas!"
"I don't know... Dad, or Mom right now, its weird, might get mad at me..."
"Pl-hee-se ho? I'm just a poor snowman, unable to stand up to my greedy corp-ho-rate overlord...", he faked a sniffling noise and tried his best to make puppy dog eyes, though considering his eyes were pupiless red dots, they had the opposite effect on the child.
"Oooh jeez ok ok I'll help, just stop making that face!", she cried, shuffling away from him a little.
"My brother and I- yes I know technically we're cousins- would like to help as well.", Naoya offered his assistance.
"Why hee ho?"
"This little celebration is a sham. Lucifer invited us offering to help in our-"
"Your.", Kazuya corrected.
"Our,", he insisted, "plans of killing that old fool God, but instead he wastes his time gossiping and bickering about pointless nonsense."
"You and your revenge.", Kazuya muttered, shaking his head. "You guys can go do whatever, I'm still trying to beat this level." He angled his head down to continue playing on his DS, but before he knew it, it was snatched out of his hands by a familiar tail.
"Nuh uh uh." Lilim wagged her finger. "You hafta participate too. Lets spend some sibling bonding time~.", she practically sang, sidling up to her reincarnated brother from another mother.
Alex joined the conversation. "Well I guess I'll join this little revenge plan too... if only to get back at Hitonari's totally-wrong-logic-cuz-I'm-right!"
Naoya sighed. "Like mother like daughter as they say."
"You gotta hurry up and tell us your plan little frost. Aleph left for the bathroom and we can't let that goody-two-shoes snitch catch wind of our plan.", Lilim whispered to the Black Frost.
"Yeah yeah I'm thinking hee ho..." Hee-ho gazed back at Demi-fiend, then turned it to Satan, then back at Demi-fiend. He smirked menacingly. "I think its time we hee made some calls ho..."
TO BE CONTINUED...
