SMK Chapter 15 – Day 7
Lee sat behind his desk and gazed across the room at his wife. She was wearing his favorite blue blouse. Her hair, though tucked up at each side, floated down to just brush her shoulders the way he liked it. She looked beautiful.
He looked more closely. Yeah, she looked beautiful, but she didn't look quite well. Maybe it was the stress of everything that had been going on. It seemed like they hadn't had a break since, well, since even before they got married four months ago.
"Manda, you look exhausted," Lee's brow furrowed with worry.
She looked up at him and smiled softly. "I'm okay, really."
"You sure?" He didn't sound convinced. He stood up, came around her desk, and scooted one hip onto it. She smiled up at him as he gazed down at her and reached out to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear.
"I promise." She smiled. "I'm okay." She expelled a short laugh as he cocked his head at her and squinted his eyes, looking for all the world like a parent who didn't believe his child.
"Maybe I should take you down to see Doc Kelford," Lee suggested, only slightly teasing. Amanda looked up at him with a cocked eyebrow. "Well, aren't you glad you made me go see him?" He winked at her, reminding her of the week before their wedding when he was injected with a lethal bacteria.
"Of course I'm glad I made you go." She whispered and reached up to stroke his arm. It wasn't something she could tease about; it hadn't been long enough ago.
He took hold of the hand she had laid on his thigh and drew it to his lips to kiss the back of it. "Then humor me. I want you to see Doc. Kelford."
"Aw, Lee," she shook her head. "I'm fine. I promise; no one has injected me with anything." She winked, trying to lighten the mood.
"Manda..."
"No, really," she insisted. "I don't want to go see Doc Kelford."
"As I recall, Darling," he continued, "You didn't give me any choice in the matter whatsoever."
Amanda sighed. "Alright, listen," she hedged. "If I'm not feeling better in a couple of weeks, I'll go, okay?"
He shook his head. "No, not okay."
"Lee..." Exasperation laced her voice.
"Nope, I mean it." He stood and pulled her up with him. "I've been watching you get more and more tired when your energy level really should've been moving in the other direction by now." Pressing his hand gently against her lower back, he guided her toward the door where she stopped and turned to him.
"Lee..."
"No, Amanda," he looked her sternly in the eye. "I didn't wait this long to find you only to take chances with you now." He gently put his hands on either side of her face.
"What are you talking about? We live dangerously every day," she chuckled.
He wasn't buying the deflection. "Come on." He took her by the shoulders, turned her around, and led her out the door. She had an uncomfortable point, though. One he seriously needed to think through.
"Scarecrow," Dr. Kelford stuck his head out the door and into the agency's medical waiting room.
Lee looked up even as he closed the magazine, set it on the coffee table in front of him, and stood up. "Yeah, Doc?"
"Would you join us, please?"
Lee felt his heart begin beating a staccato rhythm in the middle of his chest. "What's wrong? Is Amanda okay?"
"Mrs. King is going to be just fine," Dr. Kelford assured him with a smile. "She asked me to have you join us."
Lee let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding. "You sure?"
"Yes, Scarecrow," Dr. Kelford smiled. "I'm sure. Come on back."
Lee followed the white lab coat through the door and back into the private office area where Dr. Kelford opened the door of an exam room and motioned Lee to enter. Amanda sat on the black gurney in a green, hospital gown. She didn't look so great.
"Manda?" Lee asked quietly as he walked over to her and took her hand. "What's going on?" Honestly, he was kind of surprised she wanted him back here. Having him here while in a hospital gown was a dead give-away that there was something more intimate between them than being partners and friends. Of course, his behavior with her the day he rescued her from the elevator bomb might have already given that away.
Amanda squeezed his hand and smiled, but didn't say anything. He turned and looked at the doctor again. "Doc?" Despite Dr. Kelford's reassurances, his heart was starting that wild beating thing again. "You said she was going to be fine."
"Calm down, Scarecrow." He laid a hand on Lee's shoulder. "She's going to be fine. The next seven months could get a bit rocky because of her age, but we're going to take the best care of her we possibly can. Don't you worry."
Lee glanced at Amanda, whose eyes were wide with what seemed like shock. "Doc," he turned back toward Dr. Kelford. "What are you talking about?"
"Well, these things are never 100% certain, but my guess would be she's got about seven months left."
Panic hit full force. "What do you mean she has seven months left? What's wrong with her?"
Dr. Kelford laughed. "No, son. I don't mean she has seven months left to live!" He patted Lee's shoulder again. "I mean she has about seven months left in her pregnancy."
It took a full minute before Dr. Kelford's words registered in Lee's mind. Still holding Amanda's hand, he dropped onto the stool next to the gurney, and swiveled his head back and forth from Amanda to the doctor. "She's going to have a..." he whispered, looking at the doctor. He turned again to look at Amanda. "We're going to have a...?" He felt so many conflicting emotions he couldn't sort through them, but he was aware enough that he realized he'd just said a little too much with that "we" statement. Oh well. It was probably already obvious to the doc. He cleared his throat. "Doc," his eyes never left Amanda. "Could you give us a moment?"
"Sure, son. Give me a shout when you're ready to talk." He smiled gently at Amanda, opened the door, and left.
Lee's gaze remained on his wife; her eyes glistened with a touch of moisture. "Aw, Manda..." He stood, stepped in front of her, and gathered her into his arms.
Amanda had been feeling nothing but shock since the doctor had given her the news ten minutes ago. A baby? Now? At this point in her life? Her feelings were confused and conflicted. She wrapped her arms around Lee's waist and let him hug her.
She drew in a deep, shuddering breath and tried to calm herself down. This had not been part of their plan. Still...a baby! With Lee! She shook her head again. Who would have ever thought. She didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
"Manda," Lee's voice reverberated against the top of her head. "Talk to me, Sweetheart." He pulled back just a fraction and lifted her chin with his finger.
When she looked up, he gently swiped his thumbs underneath her eyes, wiping away the tears that had slipped out. She was annoyed with herself. She had a soft heart, but she wasn't a cry-baby. She tried to speak again, but just didn't have words. With her face still tilted up by his finger under her chin, she closed her eyes and shook her head back and forth almost imperceptibly.
"It's okay. No matter what you're thinking and feeling...it's okay to talk with me about it. You know that, right?"
She opened her eyes and fingered the buttons of his shirt, still not looking at him. "I'm not sure what I'm thinking or feeling, Lee," she whispered. "I think I'm kind of in shock."
Amanda felt Lee chuckle. "Well, I'm certainly with you there, my Darling." He cradled her head against his chest again and took a deep, steady breath. It calmed her a little. Then, his hands were back on her face, coaxing her to look up at him. "Sweetie, look at me."
She did as he asked, but the moment their eyes met, she felt fear bubble up inside her. "I think I'm scared, Lee."
His eyes searched hers. "Okay." He stroked a cheek with his thumb. "What are you afraid of?"
"There's so much..." she looked down again and shook her head. She took in a deep breath, and then the words tumbled out. "What if you don't want this? What if I don't want this? What if my family doesn't want this? What about our jobs...my job? Just about everything we do is dangerous, but I love doing what we do together. What if this changes things between us? What if you feel like this baby and I are tying you down? What about my age? What if it's a risky pregnancy? What about everything going on right now?"
Lee took a breath to speak, but she wasn't done yet.
"My boys are teenagers, Lee...and now I'm starting over? Bottles, diapers, baby-seats, diaper bags, mid-night feedings..."
"Whoa, hoa, hoa," Lee interrupted. She paused long enough for him to speak. "Can I ask you something?" She nodded. "Do you know how much I love you?" he asked softly. "Do you have any idea how much you mean to me?"
"Yes," she said softly.
"Okay, then." He looked deeply into her eyes. "This baby is part of me and part of you, right?"
"Uh, yeah," she nodded her head once. He closed his eyes, looked toward the ceiling, and shook his head. "Lee?"
He looked back down at her, something deep and new shining in his eyes. "This life growing inside of you is my child." A smile began stretching across his lips. "My child," he whispered. "You are the mother of my child."
"You're not angry," she stated the obvious.
"No! Of course, I'm not angry." He shook his head. "Worried about you, yes. Scared enough to be quaking in my boots, yes." He nodded his head slowly up and down to emphasize the gravity of his words. "But angry?" His head shook and pulled her into another hug. "No, Darling. I'm not angry."
"What are we going to do?" Amanda's voice was muffled slightly as she spoke into his chest. "There's so much to think about. It's…overwhelming."
"I know," he pulled away slightly to make eye-contact again. "But we don't have to have it all figured out right now. In fact, we don't have to have any of it figured out right now." He smiled at her. "Right now, let's just savor the news of this...unexpected, but miraculous gift we've been given. Let's celebrate!" Joy spread across his face.
"And there it is," Amanda smiled up at him.
"There what is?"
She reached up and stroked his hair back from his forehead. "My man who always sees the silver lining."
