Chapter Nine
~O~
Marian and Anders looked up when a shrill whistle sounded from behind them, both smiling in relief to see a good sized ship fast approaching.
"Ferelden Flame," Anders read the name from the front of the ship. "Well, that's handy, we didn't even have time to worry about being stuck without food and water before being found."
Squinting against the bright light from the rising sun, she ran her fingers through her hair, trying to tame it while she tried to make out how many people were on the fast approaching ship. As far as she could see, there seemed to be quite a number of passengers aboard.
"Good thing I have plenty of coin in the bottom of my bag," she muttered. "In case they demand we pay to be rescued."
"How clever of me to take up with a rich woman who can see to all my needs." He gave her a playful smile that made her laugh.
"I'll see to your needs, alright. I'll rub my pouty lip all over my favorite cock when next I get the chance of it."
He laughed. "Are you wanting to put on a show for the Ferelden Flame's passengers and crew?"
She smirked and shook her head, reaching for the rope ladder that was dropped down to them from the larger vessel. Grabbing her pack, extra bag and her staff, she started climbing. "See you up there, love."
Anders nodded, still smiling to himself when Marian disappeared from view. He started his own climb a moment later, bringing the rest of their possessions with him from the little boat, musing over what a memorable time they had spent during the storm and while stranded. He had a hard time trying to temper his grin as he climbed over the railing, fully aboard the large ship. He briefly froze at the scene before him, then quickly discarded all he carried before dropping down beside Marian, frowning at the older, bearded man leaning over her.
"Are you traveling with this young woman?" the man asked, in a rich deep voice that rung with authority, blue healing light coming from the palm he held above her.
"Yes, we are traveling together. What happened to her? We were laughing and talking just before she climbed the ladder."
The man sat back on his heels, looking puzzled. "I don't detect illness, or anything wrong with her."
A tall, heavily muscled man stepped near, with dark hair and blue eyes, looking down in concern. "Will she be alright, Father? Can you heal her?"
Losing patience, Anders leaned closer, turning his lover's unconscious face toward him. "Marian, can you hear me? I need you to wake up, please." When there was no visible response beyond her slow, even breaths, he looked back at the bearded man and repeated his question. "Can you tell me exactly what happened when she stepped on board, before she lost consciousness?"
The man shrugged, looking again at Marian's still face. "I extended my hand to her, to help her aboard. Since I'm a healer, the ship's captain asked me to see to you both, to make sure you were well, and if not I could help you. I welcomed her, told her my name, and she crumpled in a dead faint. I caught her so she didn't injure herself by falling. Perhaps she needs some water due to dehydration?"
Shaking his head, Anders looked away from her face to the bearded man again and stood so he could look the man in the eye. "I'm a healer too, we weren't on the boat long enough to become dehydrated, and she hasn't been ill, she's as healthy as a horse. I'm Anders, by the way, and this is Marian.
The man smiled, a wide friendly grin. "It's always nice to meet a fellow healer." He extended his hand and grasped the blond mage's hand. "Anders, pleased to meet you. I'm Malcolm Hawke, and this is my younger son, Carver. The rest of my family are on the other side of the ship."
As the names washed over him with a jolt of familiarity, he realized exactly why Marian had fainted, keeping his expression neutral while he nodded a greeting at Carver, who bore a clear resemblance to Marian, now he knew he was speaking to her father and brother. "The rest of your family," he questioned, deciding he better get all the information he could before Marian woke up. "You have other children?"
Malcolm's smile softened. "I have an older son, Garrett, and a daughter, Bethany. My wife, Leandra, is also with them. I would be glad to introduce you when Marian awakens." Looking down at her again, he crouched and took her hand, chafing it gently between his hands, before he extended a hand over her forehead, the green light of a rejuvenation spell emanating from it. When her lashes fluttered and she drew a deep breath, Anders couched down and turned her face toward his.
"Marian? Mari, can you hear me?"
Her eyes opened slowly and focused on him. "Anders, I hear you."
Keeping her face turned toward him, he gave her an intense look. "The healer, Malcolm Hawke, and his son, Carver, have been watching over you. You're going to be fine. I'm right here."
Her eyes widened in a brief look of panic before she calmed at his reassuring smile. "I'm right here with you," he repeated. When she nodded to the unspoken question, he released her face and helped her sit up.
"Well, Marian," Malcolm said in his deep voice. "You gave us a bit of a scare there. Hopefully nothing a good night's rest won't cure."
"Yes, thank you...Malcolm...you're very kind to look after me." While Malcolm helped her to her feet, Anders turned and gathered their things, his brows climbing in surprise when he turned back to find Carver cradling Marian against him, in his arms, while Malcolm smiled and beckoned them to follow him.
Suppressing a smile, Anders avoided Marian's wide, shocked eyes and addressed Carver. "I can take her, if you like."
With something resembling a smirk, Carver shook his head and moved to follow his father. "No need, she weighs almost nothing. My sword is heavier." He briefly looked down. "You might need to eat more, Marian."
"At least you aren't calling me fat," she muttered. "I suppose I should be grateful."
"Only a daft bastard would call you fat," he said with a laugh. Another well built man with dark hair, a beard and brown eyes sauntered up and smiled at Marian before he addressed Carver.
"Looks like you went off and found all the fun, brother. A lovely damsel. Shall I take a turn carrying her for you?"
Carver frowned and half turned, looking like a child about to have his favorite toy taken away, while Marian and Anders traded annoyed looks.
"I'm not a damsel, dammit. I'll fry your ass with lightning if you don't keep your distance. Put me down, Carver," she said in a firm tone that had him instantly set her on her feet and take a step back, smiling when she glared at his older brother. "And who are you, exactly?" She crossed her arms and gave him an assessing look, which made him grin and wink.
"Garrett Hawke, at your service, and you are?"
"She's not interested," Anders said in a cool tone, pulling her back against his chest. Resting her hand on the arm Anders had wrapped around her collarbone, she smirked.
"I'm Marian, this is Anders, and he's correct, Garrett, I'm not interested in any man that isn't him, other than for friendship. Your….your..father helped me when I was unwell a bit ago. Did I hear someone say you have a sister, as well?"
With a nonchalant shrug, Garrett gestured behind him with a thumb over his shoulder. "Bethany is this way, with our mother. Come, I'll introduce you."
After sharing a nervous look with Anders, she fell into step by Carver. "How did your family come to be on this ship? Were you fleeing the blight?"
"Sort of." He gave her a curious look. "Do you really care or are you just making small talk?"
"I'm interested in what you have to say, Carver," she said with an exasperated smile. "Why do you think I wouldn't be?"
He gave her a crooked smile. "You don't look like the kind of woman that would care about anything I have to say."
"Exactly what kind of woman is that?" She frowned, waiting for his explanation.
He chuckled and shook his head, meeting her eyes with a smile before he looked forward again. "Pretty. Confident. Dangerous. You remind me a bit of Garrett, except he's an ass, and you're actually charming. I bet that opens a lot of doors for you, doesn't it?"
Smiling, she winked at him. "Charm has its uses, you aren't wrong there. It wouldn't hurt Garrett to acquire some," she said, loud enough to draw an amused smile from him when he glanced back at her.
"Thought so." Carver grinned, glad to have someone else to give his over-confident brother a hard time.
"So," she said brightly. "Where is your family headed, Carver?"
"Kirkwall, actually. My mother is a noble and she inherited the estate when her parents passed away. There's a steward that's been looking after the place for her, but we're going to move in, now Ferelden is blighted in so many areas."
"Oh. That sounds...nice. You're lucky to have your family. Very lucky." She said in a quiet voice, clinging tightly to Anders hand when he slipped it into hers.
"What about you?" Carver asked with furrowed brows. "Where's your family?"
"Dead. All dead."
"I'm sorry." Hearing the hollowness in her voice, the ache beneath her words, touched something inside him, an unexpected wave of sympathy rose in him. He reached for her shoulder and rested his hand there, squeezing it in comfort. She gave him a grateful smile with tears in her eyes, and he wanted those tears gone, so he shrugged and tried to make a joke.
"I'll share my family with you, if you like. I'll gladly trade you for Garrett, and I know Father would be happy to have another daughter." He stopped suddenly and she stopped too, wondering why he was grinning. "You know what, Marian? I think you and I kind of look alike, don't we? What do you think?" He asked Anders, sweeping a hand between them. "We have the same hair and eyes, at least."
Smirking, Anders crossed his arms, raising a brow at Garrett when he walked back to them. "Actually, there is an undeniable resemblance. If I didn't know better, I would say Carver and Marian are definitely brother and sister. Neither of you look much like Garrett."
"I do, I look just like Garrett," said a brunette woman with brown eyes the same color as Garrett's. Slipping her arm around his waist, she leaned against him when he dropped a kiss to the top of her head.
"Damn right," he said. "We're the good looking Hawke siblings. No comment on the blue-eyed one over there, and the stray he just adopted."
"Oh, sod off, Garrett." Carver pulled Marian against him, with his arm draped across her shoulders. "Marian is beautiful, so if I look like her, then that obviously makes me handsome, which you clearly aren't."
Marian lifted a hand to her mouth, to cover her giggles. She hadn't had this much fun in a long while.
"I'm Bethany," the brunette said, with a little wave.
"That's Marian next to Carver, and I'm Anders, her very devoted worshiper." Anders winked when Marian bit into her bottom lip with a sultry smile.
"Worshiper?" Garrett looked between them and shook his head. "I think the word you're searching for is lover, Anders. It's obvious, you both do that thing that couples that have been together for a long time do, like you're part of each other's orbit. Mother and Father do it too."
Anders laughed. "Really, a long time?" When Marian walked over and slipped her arms around his waist, he smirked down at her. "How long have we been together, love?"
She tilted her head, considering. "I think it's right about a month since we met, isn't it? But if you mean together, together, as lovers, then only a few days. It's strange it's only been a few days, it seems like it should be longer, doesn't it?"
The look in his eyes made her shiver, and he smiled knowingly. "We covered a lot of territory and made excellent use of our time. That's likely why it feels like longer."
"You're both lying," Garrett said with a confident smile. "I have a very good sense of these things, and there's no possible way you have been together for so brief a time." He narrowed his eyes while he looked at them, then nodded. "My guess is a minimum of three to five years, at the very least."
"No one cares about your stupid guesses, Garrett," Carver said in disgust, stopping next to Marian and Anders and tugging on her arm. He gave Anders an apologetic smile. "I need to borrow my new sister for a moment, please. I'll return her unscathed, I promise." Pulling her along behind him, he stopped in front of both of his parents, sitting on a bench together.
"Mother, I want you to meet Marian. Since we look so much alike and she has no family of her own, she's agreed to become my sister, in place of Garrett. I always felt like I was supposed to have an elder sister more than an elder brother."
Malcolm and Leandra shared a long look, Malcolm nodding before Leandra rose with her eyes suspiciously moist. Malcolm stood as well and looked at his son.
"Carver, go and keep Anders company for a few moments, won't you? I need to discuss something with Marian privately, it's about her health. She'll be along after we speak."
Frowning, Carver nodded. "Alright, Father. I'll see you soon, Mari." He walked off while Marian tried to discreetly wipe away the tears that rose at Carver's familiar use of her shortened name that he always called her.
"He always called you that, didn't he, dear heart?" Malcolm asked in a gentle tone, bringing her startled gaze up to his, and to Leandra's, who was watching her with a smile and tears running down her face. Reaching out, Malcolm took one of her hands in his warm, firm grip, and Leandra took the other before he spoke again.
"We know you're our daughter, Marian. We've been waiting for you for a long time. I'm sorry I couldn't warn you earlier, before you fainted, but I had no idea when or how we would be reunited with you, only that we would be."
With her mouth hanging open, she looked back and forth between them. "But….how? I don't understand."
"You're Garrett's twin, Marian. In fact, you were born five minutes before him, so you are also our eldest child. We had you for six months, and…" Leandra's voice broke and Malcolm hugged her against him with the arm he had wrapped around her shoulders, and continued the story where she left off.
"When you were six months old, playing in the sitting room with Garrett, he started to cry, to scream. Your mother and I were only steps away, in the kitchen. When we came into the sitting room to discover what the problem was, because Garrett never screamed, you were gone, without a trace. There was a residue of very strong magic where you had been sitting, playing with your toys, but that was all. I had no sense of where you had gone or what had happened to you. You've heard of the gift of Precognition, haven't you?"
Marian nodded silently, with eyes gone even wider than before.
Malcolm's brows furrowed and he shook his head. "I began having dreams of you. I don't really know if it was future sight, or if I was just given glimpses of you, wherever you had been taken. They weren't as bad when you were still a child, but when you reached adulthood, I saw...awful things. You fighting demons, a giant Qunari that stabbed you viciously, a chantry exploding into the sky, possessed templars with magical, red blades, trying to kill you… It was the stuff of every parent's nightmares. But I never saw your death, so I held onto hope, however small, that one day we would see you again." Smiling faintly, he nodded.
"Then, I began to see waking visions of you here. First, I saw you with your young man, Anders. Not the sick, possessed one I saw you with first, the whole one, the good one that came with you onto this ship. Then, I saw you with your brothers and sister, with all of us, your mother and I, all living together, at the estate in Kirkwall. We made arrangements to go there, as quickly as we could, eager to bring about the reunion of our entire family. Then, the Blight came, unexpectedly delaying our departure, with all the refugees from Ferelden, seeking somewhere safe to go. This was the first ship we were able to get passage on for all of us. I never dreamed…" His voice thickened with tears.
"I never dreamed you would be given back to us before we ever made it to Kirkwall, our dear, brave girl." He lifted her face and stared into her eyes with all his love shining down at her from his warm brown eyes, through his tears. "All the horrors you endured, all the evil you fought," he continued, in a deep, fervent tone. "Just to come back to us. I knew you would, I never doubted your resolve, and your mother never lost faith either."
Leandra pressed a kiss against her forehead. "Marian, I'm so proud of you, darling, I always have been. Your father told me about the nightmare you endured, the one where the insane man did unspeakable things to me. Oh, my darling, I'm so sorry, but it wasn't me, my dear girl, I've been waiting for you all this time. I knew you would come back to us."
Marian looked at the weeping faces of her father and her mother, and something deep down inside of her burst open, like an overripe fruit on the last day of summer, it gave way, a dam of emotions she had spent a lifetime suppressing, but they flowed out of her now with an undeniable violence. "I buried you both," she sobbed. "I buried you both, and I failed you, all of you!" she wept, in big, gulping sobs she could barely breathe through. "Father, then Bethany, then Carver...and then Mother too. I failed you all! You all died because of me!" She cried, her head bowing in shame, her legs growing too weak to hold her up.
"You have never failed any member of this family, Marian Rose Hawke, and you never will. You became a champion of the people, every parent would be proud to claim you, my child. If your brothers and sister knew what you endured, they would be unspeakably proud of you too." Her father declared in his big, deep voice.
Strong arms wrapped around her from behind, easily taking her weight, while he rested his face against hers. "Marian, I'm here for you, love," Anders whispered in her ear. "I'm always here for you." Turning toward him, she wrapped her arms around him tightly and buried her face against his chest, soaking in the warmth and comfort of his love and embrace for long minutes. Things in her heart and mind slid around and readjusted to the wonderful, new reality that had been plopped before her like an unexpected gift from above. Maybe the Maker did love her, just a little. Inhaling a breath of air that tasted sweet and crisp going into her lungs, she let out an unsteady laugh.
"Andraste's flaming sword, it felt good to get all that out." When she heard laughter all around her, she lifted her head and discovered she was surrounded by Hawkes, all smiling at her. Predictably, it was Garrett's voice she heard first.
"Father, Mother, you couldn't have warned me Marian was my sister, maybe, I dunno...before I hit on her? I'm feeling a little nauseous now at the thought, Father you might need to give me a tonic or something."
Marian giggled against Anders chest while Leandra sighed loudly. "Garrett, I think I have given up all hope of you ever having any sense. Thank the Maker your sister is returned to us, she has enough sense for both of you."
Turning in Anders arms, she leaned back against him and gave Garrett a wicked smile. "And you're my little brother, Garrett. Step out of line or pick on Carver again, and I'm going to kick your ass from here all the way to Kirkwall and back."
He pursed his lips, his eyes calculating. "What spells do you know? It's possible I could still beat you with magic."
Anders laughed and shook his head. "She knows all the spells, Garrett, all of them, even some really damn scary ones. Have you ever dueled a giant Qunari one on one and walked away? She has. I would advise you to stay on her good side, at least as much as you are capable of."
Bethany came up and kissed her cheek and grinned. "It's strange to suddenly find out I have a sister, but I can't wait to get to know you, Marian, I always wished I had a sister. It's exciting to have a wish come true for the first time."
Marian kissed her cheek. "I'm looking forward to spending time with you too, Bethy. I can't wait."
Finally stepping away from Anders, Marian threw her arms around both of her parents, ginning when they both covered her cheeks in kisses. Pulling away, she turned toward Garrett with a determined look, walking toward him. "Alright, Garrett, let's get this out of the way. Give me a hug, brother."
Frowning, Garrett took a step back then gave her a panicked look. "I can't move. Why can't I move?"
Turning to Anders, she smirked when he winked at her. "Promise to give me a quick, brotherly hug, and Anders will release you from the paralysis he cast on you."
"Very well, I promise," Garrett grumbled, fixing his gaze on Anders. "I hope you realize you're going to pay for that, lover of my sister. Sometime when you least expect it." When he was able to move freely again, he leaned over and gave his new sister a brief, loose hug.
"Good luck with that," Anders said with a smirk. "I'm always ready for a fight, and I also have a guardian Hawke to watch my back."
"More than your back, you beautiful man," she quipped, striding past him before she turned with a puzzled frown. Looking at her Father, she asked, "Carver?" He pointed to where his younger son leaned against the railing along the side of the ship. "I believe he wanted to speak to you privately, dear heart. You know he isn't one for public displays of emotion."
Smiling, she set off to where Carver stood alone and stepped up next to him, looking out across the waves, where the sun shone, creating glittering crystals of light from the wet spray. "It looks like an ordinary day, but it's been a strange one, hasn't it?"
"Very strange," Carver murmured. "Strange, and disturbing." He turned and met her gaze, his blue eyes turbulent from his churning emotions.
"Disturbing, how? That I'm your sister?" She looked down and blew out a slow breath. It hadn't occurred to her that Carver might not want her as his actual sister. She tried to ignore the sting to her heart that caused, and faced toward the water again. "You...don't have to spend time with me or hug me, Carver. Just because we're of the same blood, you are under no obligation to have a relationship with me. In fact, I can leave you on your own again now, I wasn't trying to disturb. I just wanted to come and say hello, so maybe I'll speak with you some other time."
She turned to leave and his arm shot out, clamping onto hers, the slight tremble in the fingers he dug into her telling her even more about his emotional state than the unrest in his eyes. Keeping her gaze on the wood deck at her feet, she rested her back against the railing for a moment, letting his fingers loosen before she turned smoothly, taking the hand from her arm and clasping it between both of her own. Fixing her gaze on the water again, she stroked her fingers soothingly over the top of his, distantly amused at how big his hand was, held between her much smaller ones.
"If you want to talk about what's disturbing you, I'm happy to listen, and I'll never judge you, Carver. I've always respected your opinion."
He made a sound of discomfort, and turned more toward her so he could see her eyes, his gaze latching onto hers like a drowning man to a life raft. "That's just it, you seem to know me, knew me, while I've only just met you. I heard what you said to Mother and Father, you watched me die? That's…" Her eyes filled with tears at the memory. He clenched his jaw, but he didn't look away from her, so she stared into his eyes and showed him her pain.
"I watched all of you die, wherever I was, terrible things happened all the time. Death was common, but watching every one of you..." she whispered. "Some far more painfully than others, but you…" She drew an unsteady breath, tried to make her voice calm, but her distress still seemed apparent. "I shouldn't have favorites, I know I shouldn't, but….you were always mine, Carver. You were my baby, I tried to carry you everywhere." She laughed at the memory of her petite toddler self trying to lift the enormous baby Carver was, leaning over the rail when her laughter became almost uncontrollable. She waved a hand to encompass him.
"I mean, look how big you are compared to me, and even as a baby, you were more than double my size, it was absolutely ludicrous!" He chuckled while she bent over with laughter again, both of them left with smiles when the laughter finally faded away. "I know you don't have any of those memories with me, and maybe that's the Maker's mercy to you, I'm far from perfect. It's just as well you don't have memories of all my fuck-ups, and believe me, there were plenty."
Grinning, Carver leaned his forearms against the railing, bringing him down closer to Marian's height. "My big sister says fuck?"
She gave him an amused grin. "Of course I say fuck, who doesn't say fuck, poncy Garrett? Fuck him if he's too proper to say fuck."
Carver let out a true laugh and shook his head, his eyes no longer troubled, but dancing with amusement. "Mari, I think I already love you. It's madness."
Slipping her arm through his, she leaned her head against his big shoulder. "Of course you love me, Carver, we've already established I'm charming. Just let it happen, it will be me and you against Garrett, it will be beautiful."
Still smiling, he let his hand rest on hers, wrapped around his arm. "I don't like seeing you hurt, and I hated seeing you cry, Mari." He met her gaze, all traces of humor gone, and she saw the steely strong brother she knew and loved, smiling at the sight of him before he looked back out at the water.
"I don't think I have anything left to be hurt about or cry over anymore. You people all seem to live charmed lives here, you're even fucking rich nobles, for Maker's sake."
Carver smirked and gave her an amused look. "What, are you saying you were poor? Was I poor?"
"We were poor, brother. Too fucking poor to even pay attention. I had to work my ass off to earn enough to buy back the bloody estate in Hightown."
"What?" Carver pursed his lips, looking confused. "Why would you have to buy back the estate, what happened to it?"
"Gamlen, the asshole, happened to it, and all his fucking gambling and whoring. Ring a bell?"
Carver shook his head, clearly mystified. "I've never heard of a Gamlen. I don't think we know anyone by that name."
Marian's mouth fell open in surprise. "Mother's brother, you don't know him?"
"Mother's an only child, Mari," Carver said with an amused smile.
"What?" She let out a burst of delighted laughter. "The Maker really must adore me, if there's no Gamlen here." She laughed again, relieved she would never have to see or speak to the weasel, ever again. "Well," she murmured, still amazed. "Fuck me sideways."
"I'd be glad to," Anders said, sliding his arm around her waist, and pressing against her from behind. "But your poor brother here would be scandalized, not to mention all the rest of the people on board. We should probably go with something a bit more discrete."
Pushing away from the railing, Carver rolled his eyes at Marian's smirk. "Right, I'll leave the two of you to...whatever it is you're doing." He grinned with a decided look of anticipation. "I'm going to go find Garrett, and rub his nose in the fact that he isn't actually the eldest child, and has no bragging rights. See you both later." Carver walked away, whistling a cheerful tune.
~O~
