Sonea looked up from the book in her lap when she heard the sound of the residence's door open and shut. She heard the low murmur of Akkarin and Takan's voices, then her heart leapt as she recognised the soft footsteps and swish of robes coming up the stairs.
Akkarin stopped outside her room's door and knocked gently. Sonea opened her door with magic, set the book aside and stood up, bowing. "High Lord."
Akkarin's lips curled into an amused smile at the formality, but he inclined his head as he walked inside, then shut the door behind him. Sonea's could feel her heart pounding in her ears. She glanced at him, half excited, half apprehensive. When she saw he held his smile as he looked at her, she returned it with a small smile of her own.
"Good morning, Sonea."
That smooth voice stirred recent, and very graphic, memories in her mind. "Good morning."
Akkarin walked up to her and reached out a hand, stroking her cheek. His eyes glittered with warmth. Sonea let out a breath she wasn't even aware of holding and relaxed into his hand.
She didn't know what she had been expecting – many possibilities had ran through her head this morning when she woke up in the High Lord's bedroom alone, the residence empty. Would Akkarin treat the previous night like it hadn't happened? Did he wake up regretting it? Would his demeanour be cold towards her again? Last night couldn't have been more different to her 'intimate initiation', but she hadn't dared hoped he would be openly affectionate in the light of day.
"Did you eat?" Akkarin asked, letting his hand fall to his side. A little line of concern appeared between his dark eyebrows.
"Yes, thank you," Sonea answered. She wasn't sure if she should say his name. It felt like they were well past it, and yet, she couldn't gauge his thoughts.
"Good. Let's sit down for a moment," he moved towards one of the two small chairs in Sonea's room. "Have you learned how to create acoustic shields yet?"
Sonea carried her chair nearer his with magic and they both sat. "Yes, last winter."
Akkarin nodded. "Please create one around us."
Sonea concentrated for a moment, remembering the method, then produced a sound-absorbing shield around them that was almost, but not quite, fully transparent.
"Quite good," Akkarin observed. "I can show you an easier way later – you've wasted a bit of power on its width."
Her anticipation to hear what he would say had actually resulted in a shield much clumsier than what she was capable of, but Sonea just nodded, wanting to get to the conversation she had been apprehensive about all morning. She wondered if Akkarin was stalling.
He sat back, managing to look a little imposing even in the simple novice's chair. His face, however, looked relaxed, like he had already had time to compose his thoughts. "I think we need to discuss how to proceed from here. Last night… well, things between us now cannot be as they were."
Sonea felt her jaw tense. Where is he going with this?
For a moment, Sonea couldn't help but think of the many women she had met in the slums who had been dropped after one night by a man from the Houses. They had always been convinced these men would be coming back for them, but they rarely did. Some had even been left with children to raise alone.
Perhaps Akkarin sensed her apprehension, because he gave Sonea a half-smile. "I, for one, hope what we shared last night is only the beginning."
Sonea relaxed a little. He wants this. He wants this as much as I do. "I hope so, too," she said, focusing on keeping back the tremble of emotion from her voice.
Akkarin's dark eyes narrowed for a moment with desire. "Then we will find a way to make sure it is so," he replied softly.
Sonea dropped her gaze, suddenly feeling a little shy, but her heart soared with anticipation. Could this finally be the end of all the longing, confusion and anger she had felt for months, desiring something she had thought was impossible and even wrong? Will I really get to be with Akkarin, and keep living with him, and continue to use my new magical privileges, and keep studying to become a Healer… Sonea felt a little overwhelmed at the thought. She was so used to fighting for every small thing, so used to something always being a cause for worry or concern in her life, that multiple good things couldn't possibly be happening to her at the same time.
Even in her excitement, a touch of wariness remained. The old Sonea that had been hardened by poverty, by seeing people who truly had nothing, felt almost ashamed.
Her feelings must have shown on her face, because Akkarin was searching her emotions with his eyes. "What is wrong?"
Sonea sighed. "Nothing. It's just – it's a lot to take in." She looked up at him intently. "But it's what I want."
Akkarin stood, and pulled her up to her feet. He stepped close and gripped Sonea's chin, tilting her head up and giving her a lingering kiss. Sonea closed her eyes and returned the pressure of his lips. "I have the power to make it happen," he said softly. "And I will."
He straightened and his tone grew more calculated. "I have considered some of the options, and I believe discretion is best for the time being. We are already at an advantage given our privacy in my residence, and Takan's loyalty goes unquestioned. You are perfectly within your rights to refuse a mind read, should anything require it – and you have already been guarding my own secret well."
Sonea considered his words, then nodded. She had anticipated that this would be the only option for now. The number of things she felt burdened to conceal was growing. Akkarin's black magic, Cery's secret Guild visits, and her knowledge of the underground tunnels were the ones she struggled to hide the most from her surface thoughts.
But what is the alternative? For Akkarin to announce to the Guild that his novice was his in more ways than one? Sonea couldn't put up with the suspicion and hatred of the novices and magicians again, not when her year of being ostracised had only just come to an end.
Akkarin's eyes narrowed at Sonea's prolonged silence. "I'm sure you can see that we have no viable alternative. I cannot promise anything beyond that." Then his gaze became warmer. "I hope you will agree."
Almost as unbelievable to Sonea as the topic of this conversation was being the cause of that unfamiliar hint of apology in this aloof and imposing man's voice. She smiled up at him. "I'm sure we could escape suspicion if we are careful to avoid one another outside the residence," Sonea said, a mischievous edge to her tone. "Otherwise, people may notice I'm a little too eager to leave my evening class."
Akkarin's eyes flashed with passion and that familiar half-smile returned. "Oh, I'll be sure to proclaim loudly in the Night Room that my favourite has been studiously rushing back for some evening reading in the High Lord's library, keen to excel in her Healing."
Sonea couldn't help but let slip a quiet chuckle. Secret or not, perhaps this one would be delicious, rather than burdensome, to keep. He's right, Sonea conceded. How could anyone find out if we're careful? The precautions I've been forced to take to keep Akkarin's secret will mean that our… other secret… is also safe.
Sonea took in the black-robed man in front of her. He still inspired a touch of fear in her, though that was now matched by much more pleasant emotions.
Yet there is still so much I don't know about the man I desire. But with the books he had given her to read, it felt like she was one step closer.
The way Akkarin was looking at her interrupted Sonea's thoughts. Like he was undressing her with his eyes, and promising to actually do so later.
"You have already trusted me with your body. I hope in time you will trust in my reasons for doing what I did," he said softly.
Sonea held his intense gaze with difficulty, but forced herself to not look away. She willed him to read the determination in her mind, but she tempered this with a small smile. And I hope you will trust me with the whole truth.
Akkarin returned her smile, but didn't indicate if he had heard her thoughts or not. Then his eyes focused on something far away. "Takan is about to leave for the Outer Circle market. Are you going to visit your aunt today? He is offering to escort you," he asked.
"Oh, yes – that would be good," Sonea said, suddenly remembering she had planned to visit Jonna today. "I'll be downstairs in a moment."
Akkarin brushed his cool fingers against Sonea's cheek. "Lorlen is coming to dinner at sundown." He removed the acoustic shield and walked to Sonea's door, turning around to give her a final look, as if devouring her with his eyes.
"I'll see you later this evening, Sonea," he said, with a hint of command that made Sonea's stomach clench in excitement. Then he was gone in a swish of black robes, his footsteps fading towards his study.
Sonea let out the breath she had been holding at his final words. Smiling to herself in anticipation, she shrugged on the top half of her brown novice's robes and picked out an oversized travel cloak from her wardrobe. It was going to be a very long day.
––
"Come in, my friend. Would you like some pachi wine?"
Lorlen nodded as the High Lord stood up from his favourite armchair in the entrance room of his residence. Does he just like sitting in the dark, or is this a way to intimidate any unwanted visitors? Lorlen wondered, his mouth twitching.
Akkarin raised an eyebrow at Lorlen's facial expression. "Care to share what is so amusing?"
Lorlen waved a hand dismissively and smiled. "Nothing. Just – well, you have an uncanny knack for never being caught unawares, Akkarin."
The High Lord smiled, his eyebrow still cocked. "Wouldn't you prefer that the leader of our Guild is a man well-prepared?"
"As its Administrator, certainly. As your friend, it can feel a little, well, intimidating," Lorlen admitted, taking the armchair adjacent to Akkarin's and sending out a little bit of magic to warm his glass of pachi wine. It was cold for the beginning of Spring, and the walk from his office to the little grey-walled residence on the edge of the grounds had been brisk.
Akkarin inclined his head in acknowledgement, his eyes glinting mischievously. "Maybe all of your pranks in the Novice's Quarters taught me young to be on my guard."
Lorlen allowed himself to reminisce for a moment as they raised their glasses at each other and took sips. When he caught sight of the red ring on his own hand, though, Lorlen's mood darkened slightly. He noticed Akkarin's, however, seemed lighter than usual.
"A good day?" He asked suggestively. What's happened between this morning and evening to transform the worried man I saw by the spring?
Akkarin set aside his glass and steepled his long fingers, eyes glinting as much as the ring with the High Lord's incal on his hand. "It had its… moments," he replied in a wry tone.
Then his black eyes snapped to attention as if he had sensed something, focusing on the front door a split second before it swung open silently.
"High Lord. Administrator."
Lorlen turned to see Sonea enter and bow to them both.
"Hello, Sonea. How is your family?" Lorlen asked. He was the one who approved her passage most Freedays into the City. Although, as the High Lord's novice, she could do them unaccompanied, the Guild was still kept notified.
Sonea set down her bag of books and turned to the Administrator, her eyes avoiding Akkarin altogether. Lorlen felt a pang of sympathy; she was still clearly feeling like the High Lord's hostage, despite the advantages of her new position.
"They're well, thank you for asking, Administrator. Jonna's little boy has now fully recovered. I've been helping him along."
"That's happy news. And I'm sure it feels good to be able to help," Lorlen said pointedly. I hope she is taking some comfort from that, he thought. When Sonea had first been captured, Lorlen recalled, Lord Rothen had told him that convincing Sonea her powers were more beneficial than destructive would be key to winning her over to the Guild.
"It does," Sonea gave him a small smile.
Lorlen noticed Akkarin was looking at Sonea intently, his expression inscrutable.
"Takan is ready for us in the dining room," the High Lord said, rising from his chair. He gestured for Sonea and Lorlen to walk ahead of him and they made their way into the tastefully decorated room. Takan bowed as they entered and took their seats: Akkarin and Lorlen at either head of the long table, and Sonea in between them.
Lorlen looked at the complicated place settings. "If I'd known this would be a formal dinner, I would have come better prepared," he said, raising his eyebrows.
"Well, since we have little say in our choice of clothing, I didn't think I needed to mention it," Akkarin replied sardonically. Lorlen noticed the corners of Sonea's mouth twitch, but she kept her gaze carefully on her plate.
"Oh, I meant I'd have avoided Helena's afternoon plate of snacks. My new servant seems to have decided that my work schedule needs to be supported every hour on the hour with some kind of fuel," Lorlen sighed.
"Can I suggest you ask her for raka, Administrator? I find it helps me stay alert in my afternoon classes without ruining my appetite for dinner," Sonea said as Takan brought in an array of Kyralian-style sharing plates.
"I never developed a taste for it, I'm afraid, Sonea," Lorlen smiled apologetically. "Terribly snobbish of me, I know. The habits of the Houses never did sit well with me, but it looks like I'm stuck with them."
"Something the Administrator and I found we had in common when we became friends as novices," Akkarin added, tucking in to the delicious selection on the table.
Sonea raised her eyebrows and smiled. "It's hard to imagine you both as novices, High Lord, Administrator."
Akkarin's eyes flashed with amusement and the hint of reproach in his tone seemed almost playful. "I'll remind you, Sonea, that the Administrator and I took our novice's vows just over a decade, not a century, ago."
Sonea coughed into her napkin. "I apologise, High Lord."
Lorlen raised an eyebrow across the table at Akkarin when he was sure Sonea's attention was on her food.
–Is the meal not to your liking, Lorlen?
Lorlen jumped at suddenly hearing Akkarin's voice in his head through the ring on his finger.
–I was just thinking of how… different she seems compared to the last time the three of us were in this room, he thought.
–Indeed. Getting out of the Guild and into the city always seems to do her good, Akkarin replied smoothly, a tone of finality in his voice.
Lorlen said nothing, trying to manage his thoughts to avoid them being picked up by Akkarin again. He knew the High Lord had sensed that he was not entirely convinced.
The rest of the evening passed exponentially more pleasantly than Lorlen's last dinner at the residence, when Akkarin had spent the evening in a withdrawn and cold mood, and Sonea had answered his every question with one-word responses.
Sonea bid them goodnight after the meal, and he and Akkarin spent another half hour in the library with a glass of sweet wine. Akkarin seemed a little quick to end the conversation – Lorlen had been hoping for a second glass – but the Administrator took the hint and said he had an early morning meeting with the Higher Magicians anyway.
It was only after he bid goodnight and began making his way back towards the Magician's Quarters in the midnight silence of the Guild grounds that he thought, once again, of the shift in Sonea's behaviour at dinner.
It seemed more than just a good day in the City, and Lorlen began to wonder if she knew something he didn't. Has Akkarin given her an explanation as to why he practices black magic, and she's now convinced of his innocence? Is he beginning to make her an ally in whatever he is planning?
Lorlen frowned in worry. Although Sonea knew she was among the strongest of the novices, she didn't know that she was now more powerful than a handful of their magicians, too. Given her age, she likely wasn't even at the height of her natural powers yet.
This would make her an easy, and very rewarding, follower. Lorlen wanted to believe his childhood friend was still there somewhere inside the dangerous man Akkarin now was. But every day that Akkarin withheld his motives from Lorlen, the more the Administrator wondered if he was making a fatal mistake.
Lorlen sighed as he entered the Magician's Quarters and began to climb up the stairs to his rooms. He knew there was something here, but he didn't know what he could do about it with Akkarin's ring allowing him access to Lorlen's every thought.
