Chapter 76
This was it. Two years, and all the secret-keeping had only dug him a grave. He saw it on her face which went blank, her eyes right along with it.
"Liv-"
"Don't!" She said quietly, calmly (a little too calm if you'd asked him). She simply got up from where she had been sitting, and walked out of the kitchen with Elliot right on her heels.
"Liv, just…let me explain!"
"Explain what?" She asked, getting riled but being mindful of the babies that were asleep just upstairs. "Explain how you lied to me for two years?"
"It wasn't exactly-"
"Elliot so help me god, if you say that it wasn't a lie I will lose my shit! You knew that she was alive and you said nothing!"
"I didn't think that you'd be able to handle it. You had just gone through a traumatic birth, and a horrible ordeal with daddy and his batshit daughter/wife…I thought if I could alleviate some of your pain-"
"So you lied to me… for two years?" And she again snatched her arm away when he made an attempt to softly touch her hand. "I said don't!"
Elliot quickly backed away, his hands momentarily raised in surrender. "Okay…" She didn't want him near her because right now she was repulsed by him. "I swear, it was always my intention to tell you the truth eventually,"
"Eventually? When? And say what…this- bullshit that you've been feeding me since you got here? Who are you, even?"
That stripped a layer from him, "what do you mean who am I? I'm your husband, the one who's always had your back; even now. Even though you can't see it through your an-"
She cut him off with her hysterical laughter. Laughter that made him suddenly pay attention to her obvious hurt. "The man that I love, cherish, the man who makes me feel so safe and loved; the one I could always count on to tell me the truth and hold me to it…where is that man? Because all I see in front of me now is a liar! A liar who's trying to make excuses for what he's done!"
Reeling from the accusation, "...regardless of what you think, I only did this to protect you. After Serena was born, you were so on edge; doubting your ability to mother the child you had just given birth to, hell, you were doubting your ability to keep living! I may have been wrong in telling you a lie and keeping Bronwyn's true condition from you, but you needed that lie, it gave you peace-of-mind and under the same circumstances, I wouldn't hesitate to do it again! Hell, I wonder if i did the right thing in telling you now; that bitch is lying in the hospital pretending to have amnesia!"
That last part shocked her! She was just tired of everything; of Joanie, of having to host Harlan's doppelganger and now, tired of this… Elliot trying to explain away why he lied to her two years ago. And now she wakes up to play pretend? Olivia was literally at her last straw.
"Where is she?" she demanded.
"I don't think-"
"Elliot, you have lied to me for two years so I'm not interested in what you think. Where is she??" she said, almost screaming.
Elliot looked at her, feeling her anger radiate from her. He wanted to tell her again how sorry he was, wanted to tell her that he made a mistake; a huge one and that if she would just give him a chance…but she had officially reached her limit today and couldn't hear another word except for what she was now demanding from him.
"Cornell Medical, but you don't need-"
"You arrogant bastard, don't you dare presume to know what I need!" and she grabbed her coat from the rack by the door and walked out, angrily slamming it behind her.
…
Stanley was pissed off.
He'd gotten down to the city in more than enough time to grab one of those Stabler bitches and get back to his farm, but no such luck. First, Kathleen fucking deviated from her schedule. Today, she was supposed to be at the gym at twelve but she didn't show up. Stanley waited an hour, but nothing. She had been in the gym every day, the exact same time every day, but today, nothing!
Determined not to be unsuccessful, he refocused his attention on one of the other sisters, but that was a bust as well. Lizzie was constantly surrounded by her fellow students, and Maureen had cases that she had to tend with her trainee. Why couldn't these bitches just sit still?
And to top it all off, it had started to rain.
Yes, Stanley was having a day, and not a very good one. In fact, this one had gone so bad, that he now sat in a dive bar determined to just pick up a random cunt and work the old Stanley-magic on her. After all, a kill was a kill, right? Except, he now had to wait for Ruchards, "fucking idiot!" Stanley Snickered. But serioysly, what kind of shitbrained retard doesnt understand…" and suddenly, there was Richards standing by the door and looking around for Stanley.
Found him! Kyle Richards thought as he removed his wet raincoat on his way to Stanley's table. "we got trouble!" He announced.
But Stanley just slowly looked up at him, unamused by Richards' interruption of Stanley's day. "What was so important that you had to disturb me?"
"I suppose you haven't heard?" When he looked at the utter confusion on Stanley's face, it answered his question. "...of course you haven't. That would mean that you actually care about Abernathy's mur-"
"One, we don't say that word. And two, of course I care,'
"Yeah? Then you'll be happy to know the M.E. found the puncture wound at the nape of his neck," This caught Stanley off guard, and he paused his drink mid-sip.
"What do you mean, "found the puncture wound…" did you inject it into his hairline? How the fuck did they find it?"
"she went back to take another look before she marked the autopsy as finished, now she's testing his organs for drugs not on the list, and guess what they're gonna find?!"
"Calm down,"
"Calm down? Easy for you to say, I gave the shot that killed him, I'm going down for this!"
"You're not because they won't find anything. Tests need to be run within twenty-four hours and it's been considerably longer than that. Quit bitchin, you're safe!"
"I don't know man…I got a family to think about, hell, a fiance…maybe I should just come clea-"
"Will you stop catastrophizing?!" Stanley said angrily, banging his fist on the table. Then, realizing that he was causing a scene, he laughed uncomfortably, and lowered his voice again as he looked at Kyle, who was sweating. "No one will find anything-"
"...and if they do, my life is over! I should have never gotten in cahoots with you,"
"Well, after ten years I'd say it's a little late for that, don't you?" When Richards failed to answer, instead just looking down, Stanley drew in closer. "Look, haven't I always looked out for you? We're partners; partners have each other's backs…"
But this failed to move Richards.
"Alright, how about an extra ten-thousand?" No response. "...twenty!"
"I don't know man. I need to think…all the shit I've done; all the shit we've done. I gotta get out of here!" Richards said, standing and putting on his raincoat as Phillips called to him, but he wasn't listening. "You'll meet me tomorrow?"
"yeah, yeah man, anything. I'll see you tomorrow." Stanley said, waving steadily as Kyle exited the bar. Once he was gone however, Stanley put his hand down, an angry scowl decorated his face. "There is no way I'm gonna let you fuck this up!" he said quietly, a plan already forming. Quickly, he got up to put on his coat, then took a hearty sip of his beer and threw some money down on the table before he left the bar to follow Richards.
…
Sitting in her car, out in the rain, Joanie stared at the house from where she had parked across the street. She'd been sitting here for the past fifteen minutes, wondering if she should go in, and her mind, again went back to her conversation with Joe this morning.
"How could you honestly look at that woman and blame her for what that monster did? Not just to your son, but to her?"
"She led my son on for years...broke his heart-"
"So you do this to get back at her?!"
"You don't understand..."
"Oh I understand, I understand that you didn't tell me because you want that little girl; Serena. Nevermind what you were willing to do to her poor mother to get her. Well guess what? I'm out!"
"...but he wouldn't dare, even if he were somewhat perturbed…would he?" she wondered as she looked at Olivia and Elliot's home. What if he told her? He didn't say he was going to, and if Olivia had found out, she'd surely have heard from her by now; wouldn't she?
…
At Cornell hospital, around the nurses station there were several nurses going back and forth in conversation about patients when the nurse who was assigned to Bronwyn's room approached the station and began typing notes into her tablet.
"So, Vickie, how does she look…you know, up close?" Nurse CJ asked Bronwyn's nurse. Vickie, a bit perturbed, kept her attention focused on the tablet, and typing, responded,
"...like a person?"
"Bitch," CJ said playfully, with a roll of his eyes.
"I'm sorry, girl, it's been a rough day."
"I know that's right! I saw the cops here all day…"
"FBI…" Nurse Molly cut in as she appeared out of nowhere. "Ms. Freed is big-time," she said, and continued to search the station for candy before she sat down and began typing on her tablet.
"Molly-" Vickie said, as if putting her on warning against talk like that. CJ however was all in and all here for it.
"I almost forgot about that…" CJ added, delirious that there was finally something exciting happening around here.
"Could you not, both of you?" Vickie was asking when a woman approached the nurses station.
"I need to see Bronwyn Freed…" Olivia demanded.
Vickie said in a scared, tiny voice, "I'm sorry, you are?" as CJ and Molly looked on with CJ fanning himself with one hand, while dramatically holding on to Molly's arm with the other.
"Olivia Benson,"
CJ clutched his imaginary pearls as he nearly choked at the gasp that came from him.
"I um…wait here?" Vickie said nervously. She recognized that name, hell, who in New York City wouldn't. But she also knew of Olivia's tie to Bronwyn, she had been her victim and Vickie was unsure of just what to do as she wandered off to find help.
Olivia stood, impatiently waiting, her hands in her pockets when she felt her phone vibrate. If this is Elliot again… she thought having ignored every one of the last ten calls but she was surprised to see that it was Joanie. She definitely could not deal with that right now and quickly ignored the call and put the phone back in her pocket.
…
"Daddy," Serena sweetly called to Elliot as he carried her upstairs for her bath. "When is mommy coming back? I'm thirsty."
"Princess, now how can you be thirsty? You just had a nice big cup of milk with dinner."
"But it wasn't from mommy's boobies,"
He fixed his mouth to speak just as the doorbell rang, and was so thankful that it did, not in the mood for getting into a discussion with Serena about breastmilk.
"Sweetheart, why don't you go up and ask Denise to start your bath, I'll be up in a few minutes.
"Can I pick my sleepy clothes first?"
"Absolutely."
"Yayyyy!
"Good girl." He said and kissed her then put her down and watched her run up the stairs, calling Denise. When she disappeared, he went and saw the top of Joanie's head through the glass panes in the door.
"...the hell?" he uttered under his breath as he opened the door. "Joanie, I'm sorry, did Olivia schedule a visit?"
"Oh, no," she said, looking over his shoulder and into the house as he waited for her to finish what she was saying. No luck. "Then what are you doing here?"
"I was in the neighborhood…"
"From Brooklyn."
"...seeing a friend." She said and walked right in, much to Elliot's disdain. "Is she home; Olivia, I mean?"
He made a face but closed the door.
"No, she's uh, she's out."
"You haven't seen her?"
"Yes, I have. But like I said, she's out." He told her, more forcibly than perhaps he meant.
"So, she didn't say anything to you?"
"Like what?"
"Like nothing, I was just…you know what, I'm going to go, I just remembered my bingo night!"
Relieved that she wanted to go voluntarily, "Okay, well I'll tell Oliv-"
"Oh, no sense in bothering her. I'll just give her a call tomorrow. By the way, where is my beautiful granddaughter?"
"She's taking her bath," Joanie started to say something but he cut her off. "...and I wouldn't want to get her excited before bed, and, well, like you said, you've got Bingo."
…
At the hospital, Olivia was impatiently waiting when Vickie reappeared with an officer in tow.
"Ms. Benson," she called and Olivia turned around to see that Vickie brought an officer. "This is officer-"
"Nunez," Olivia breathed a sigh of relief, she knew this officer. Nurse Vickie left them alone and Officer Nunez spoke in a lowered tone.
"Sergeant Benson, you can't be here," he said, gently taking her arm and moving her off to the side of the hall.
"Please, I just need to see if it's true, if she's…" she couldn't even finish the thought, it so unnerved her to her very core. "She's here because of me; what she did to me,"
"I know," he whispered as he looked over his shoulder at the person passing. "But I could get fired if anyone found out I let you back there."
"Julio…that woman, that…Bronwyn," her emotions threatened to choke her and she fought like hell to get ahold of them, but her thoughts were all mixed up. "…I'll beg if I need to,"
This woman had been good to him throughout his teen years when she first encountered him. She helped shape him into who he was; good to his family over the years, she was always there for him. He felt like he owed her. And besides, he knew what her husband had done. It was overheard by Bronwyn's previous guard and told to him by said guard.
"I know what happened, and I'm really sorry, Olivia." he offered. Olivia just stood, swatting the tears that flowed.
"Then you can understand why I just need to see her!"
Dammit, Julio! He cursed himself silently. We can't send her away like this. -but your job… Screw the job! "Look, you can't go in, but I'll take you to the window and that's all I can do."
"Thank you officer Nunez…thank you!"
When they reached Bronwyn's room, Olivia couldn't help the feeling of anxiety that suddenly came over her. Was she really ready to look upon this woman after two years? Officer Nunez was speaking to the other officer who was standing guard outside of the door to Bronwyn's room.
"I'll let you look through the window, but only for a few seconds, then, I'm sorry but you have to go."
"I promise. And thanks again, Julio. I know what you're risking and I really appreciate it, you don't know how much I do. Both of you.
"Anytime Sergeant." said the other officer as Olivia slowly approached the window.
Inside, Bronwyn was propped up on pillows, reading a book and it took Olivia's breath away to see her. The first thing she noticed was how thin the woman had become. She looked almost gaunt, her red hair that was hanging loose around her willowy shoulders was now sporting a streak of pure white in front with a large section of hair permanently missing on the side of her head. Her top and bottom lips appeared to have been horribly split open and stitched back together as best the doctors could which left gnarly, grotesque scarring. Her face and the right side of her scalp were even worse with areas that, in addition to the horrible scars, looked like they'd started to rot at one time and the affected areas had been removed. She truly looked like the monster she was. Suddenly, Olivia's mind went back to that day…
"You can't kill me darlin!" Harlan laughed, blood pouring out of his neck and mouth. "I'll just keep-" She didn't hesitate, and without a word, she lifted the gun and shot him in the chest. Once, twice; she kept firing until the ten rounds that were in the gun were gone, the final round going right between his eyes as she fell down to the floor and sobbed, dropping the gun, it making a dull thud on the floor as her sobs overtook her.
She cried for what seemed like forever but in reality was only a couple minutes, and when finally she pulled herself up she walked out of the room through the open door and came out into a cold basement. She immediately saw Bronwyn just lying there, beaten to a pulp and she stopped and stared at her for the quickest of moments before she began making her way through the maze of the basement, her labor threatening to stop her but she kept going…
Olivia managed to shake off the memory as she continued staring into the room, unbeknownst to its occupant. This whole place all at once felt so cold, as if evil had its hand around it and were squeezing, and a shiver ran though Olivia. That's when Bronwyn turned her head to the window and upon seeing Olivia, they locked eyes for a long moment and something didn't seem right. The look in Bronwyn's eyes… that's just it; there was no look. Just blank, dead eyes staring into Olivia's very soul. There was something menacing about those eyes as Bronwyn stared both curiously and frighteningly. Her mind was troubled as she waved wanly at Olivia.
That single gesture unraveled Olivia to her very core and she nearly jumped out of her skin, very unsettled.
"I- I should go."
"Sergeant Benson?" Julio asked, but Olivia was so frightened, she was already halfway down the hall. Bronwyn, meanwhile, continued to stare out that window, her mind turning over what she had seen.
"She's real?" She thought of Olivia; the woman who had plagued her dreams- those horrible dreams of the last two years and what did it mean. She was told earlier by the gentlemen that came to see her that she was under arrest and read- or reread her Miranda rights to her. Still, no one told her how she ended up here and she still hadn't seen a mirror. Not that she had thought to ask for one.
…
Mental limits reached. Olivia didn't care about anything except having a drink and God, she needed it right now as she wandered, feeling physically ill toward the staircase, Bronwyn kept flashing through her mind, causing angry tears and fear to come out of her. It wasn't just the way she looked, it was the way everything around her felt; dead. And when Bronwyn waved at her…it all came flooding back- not that it ever really left, but there was an evil in her presence; a coldness that Olivia couldn't wait to try to drown in a glass.
Later, she sat alone at a booth in the back of a bar, silently crying, shedding tears into the glass of whiskey in her hand that she sipped unhurried. She wasn't much of a drinker these days, but the whiskey felt good going down and was doing its job of slowly numbing her.
If only it were legal to shoot… She ruminated through her tears as she put down her drink and pulled her cell phone from her pocket, again ignoring a call. Elliot….again! "Fuck you!" She rolled her eyes, this time, turning off the phone and putting it back in her coat pocket. She wouldn't answer him until she was damn good and ready!
Maybe she should have called someone to talk her out of the whiskey. Her current head-space wouldn't mix well with alcohol; that, and the fact that in the last almost three-years, she'd had approximately two glasses of champagne- on her and Elliot's wedding day.
"Wedding day…meanwhile, she's been right under my nose the entire time. How can I ever trust you again after this?"
…
There in a diner, a woman waved Kathleen over, and Kathleen upon noticing her, smiled and headed right over to the booth…
Kathleen was nervous, can she tell? Kathleen, relax, it's Anna. Your Anna… "I'm so glad we could do this," and it showed in her voice. Anna, still sitting, motioned to Kathleen to sit in the empty seat on the other side of the table when a waitress appeared.
"What can I get ya hon?"
"uh, just coffee, thank you."
"I'm fine with the tea," Anna said, graciously.
"Sure thing!" The waitress said and left. Kathleen and Anna sat quietly for a moment, nervous stares between them, finally it was Anna who broke the silence.
"You look good…"
"You do too. I wanted to call you, but it just seemed wrong," Kathleen said sorrowfully as the waitress bought a pot of coffee and poured Kathleen a steaming cup. Both got quiet until she left. "I know we didn't exactly end on good terms…"
"I wanted to get married but you obviously weren't ready."
Kathleen took a sip from her coffee. "I loved you though, but that apparently didn't count for anything,"
"it did, more than you know,"
That brought tears to Kathleen's eyes that she tried not to cry, but quickly lost that battle. "Then why didn't we stay together?" Now Anna was crying too. "You were the love of my life; you still are, please, we can fix this."
"We can't,"
"We can,"
"Kathleen…"
"Anna, don't do this, not again!" Kathleen begged as she held Anna's hand across the table and the both shed tears.
…
At the precinct, Fin sat in his office talking to Nick on the phone.
"If there's anything you need, I mean it…okay man. I'll be there as soon as I'm out of here." He said, then hung up as Olivia stormed in, drenched.
"Did you know?" She asked, slightly drunk and close to tears. Fin looked up, alarmed at Olivia's appearance. She looked frazzled, with her hair a wet mess around her face where red-rimmed eyes sat.
"Are you alright?" He asked as he went to her and shut the door, then helped her sit down.
"NO… I've had the worst fucking day almost in my life! DAMMIT ELLIOT, NOT NOW!!" She screamed at her phone and out of sheer frustration, threw it across the room and finally just broke down into tears. After a moment, she looked up to Fin.
"You're drunk,"
"...but my thoughts are clear. Please tell me that you didn't know. I need to know that you didn't go along with him in keeping it from me."
"Keeping what from you?"
"Fin, she's alive," She said as tears dropped. "And I don't know who I can trust anymore!"
For some reason, one-and-one wasn't making two to Fin, and he asked her for clarity. "Slow down; Who's alive?"
"That red-headed, father-fucking, demon!"
"Bronwyn?!" Fin was blindsided. Two years ago he was told the same as Liv, that Bronwyn died from her injuries, and after that, he let it go. Though he never forgot what she did to Liv, and even Amanda. "it can't be!"
"You really didn't know?"
"Of course I didn't know. Did you really think I could keep something like this from you?"
"I'm not sure what to feel anymore. Elli- my god, I can't even say his name without wanting to break something! He lied to me, Fin. She's been comatose and he only told me the truth because this morning she woke up after two years!" While Fin sat with a look of utter shock on his face, Olivia went on to tell him just what was told to her, including why Elliot felt he needed to resort to lying.
"Hear me out, please. I know this isn't gonna be what you wanna hear, and don't get me wrong; Elliot was absolutely wrong for lying to you, and especially for lying for so long. But Liv-"
"Why does everyone think they know what's best for me? I'm a grown, capable woman-"
"And no one knows more than I do just how true that is, except maybe Elliot."
"Don't defend him!"
"I swear, that's not what this is. Do you remember when you'd given birth to Serena?
"It was traumatizing, thanks to Daddy and his psycho daughter."
"You were so angry, so scared, and so confused. You'd just begun healing from what happened less than a year before, just to be put right back in that same situation, and this time, you had the threat of going to jail for killing the bastard that hurt you. Not to mention a custody situation! Believe me Liv, I know what a stuggle it was for you; hell, it still is some days."
"So that gave Elliot the right..?"
"No…not the right, but he did what he did because he was afraid of pushing you even further over that edge you were already on. He did it to protect your peace. Given the circumstances surrounding that time and your state of mind, am I an asshole for sayin I understand why he did it?"
"Yes. Yes you are."
Fin smiled. He already knew that Olivia didn't mean it, she was just angry. And probably getting angrier at the fact that he was taking Elliot's side. "I know how angry you must be…hell, I'm angry. But I know that in spite of everything, you love Elliot, and somewhere inside, you have to understand where he was comin from."
"I thought Harlan and that lunatic were gone, that that part of my life was over and I at least had that on my side…but half of it was all a lie- a lie that he brought into our lives. We promised that we'd always be honest with each other no matter what… oh god, when I saw her; Fin, she looked so…"
"Wait, what do you mean you saw her? How?"
She wiped more of her tears. "I made him tell me, and I marched right into that hospital, determined to see her. Now I wish I hadn't. Seeing her traumatized me in a way that I wasn't ready for! She's evil incarnate, and I don't care that she just came out of a coma, that bitch needs to be locked up and left to rot!
…
Nine blocks Stanley had kept up with Richards; nine blocks of following him, staying in the shadows and not being seen. (All that spy shit he'd learned in the academy really came in handy.) Stanley had followed him to a coke buy from his dealer, then further out until they were in an area that Stanley only came to when he was on the hunt; it wasn't what you'd call desolate, but because of the rain and the darkness, there weren't many people around, save the stores littered here and there that were open.
He followed Richards for another block, before the man turned a corner and went into an alleyway to relieve himself.
I couldn't have written this more perfectly! Stanley smiled. He was feeling so cocky as he crept into the dark alley after Richards.
Inside the diner up the block, Kathleen and Anna were still talking.
"I wanted to see you to tell you that I'm engaged…she's really great. The wedding is in May."
All of the color drained from Kathleen and she just sat there in shock. She wasn't hearing anything that was said from that point on, she was just stuck in her own head, thinking of how she could kill them both and she hadn't even met the girl.
"I didn't want you to hear it from anyone else."
"Wow, destroyed twice in one year!" She said more to herself than anyone.
"I didn't mean-"
"Thanks for the heads up. I hope she makes you happy."
"Kathleen-"
"I'm gonna go." she uttered almost casually when she turned to look at Anna, then turned and walked out of the diner, thankful that he was so close to home where she could break down in private.
In the alley way, Richards had finished peeing against a wall by a dumpster and zipped up. But when he turned around he never saw the blade of Stanley's knife as it aimed for and slashed his throat from left to right.
Richards had a look of absolute shock about him as he saw Stanley and simultaneously reached for his neck that was hemorrhaging fast.
"You didn't think I'd just let you fuck this up, did you?" Stanley asked as he kicked the bleeding man down. Crying silent tears, Richards fell backwards against the dumpster and Stanley bent down to him to whisper: "tell the devil I said hi." and he got back up. He turned to leave and there she was, Kathleen, standing partially in the alley, unable to move; she was in shock from what she'd just seen. Stanley didn't waste a second and grabbed her up by the neck to bring her further into the alley, away from would-be prying eyes.
She screamed; she tried to, but Stanley was crushing her larynx so she knew she had to try to fight him, and she did, wildly swinging and clawing at his hand around her neck but it was no use. This fucker had the strength of a madman. All she wanted to do was go home, eat ice cream and cry, but instead, she had tjust witnessed a murder and god, she was going to be next she thought as she knocked his hat off his head and it fell to the ground.
"You…" she managed to squeeze out as he held her up against the wall where Richards slay slumped. She recognized this man, the Nordic looking freak!
He leaned in close to her face, "Surprise, Kathleen!" and he flashed a smile before taking the knife he just killed Richards with, and stabbed her in the belly a number of times in quick succession. It was in his mind, he was fucking Elliot with each suckening blow he gave his daughter. Kathleen watched as he repeatedly stabbed her, and he continued to stab until finally he took the knife and turned it inside her before he drew it upwards, causing blood to spill from her mouth.
"Why?" She asked simply as her eyes closed. He slowly removed the blade from her horribly mutilated body and dropped her, her body falling close to where Richards was.
"Your daddy could have told you, but you wont be hearing much of anything anymore." He grabbed her hair in his fist and inhaled its scent "You would have made such a good fucktoy!"
Getting up and walking over to Richards' body. He took the knife, pressed it into Richards' hand and made sure to get his fingerprints on it, then gave the scene of his crime the once over, picked up his hat and walked out of the alley while Kathleen lay bleeding out.
…
TBC…
