8 Letters

Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own the series Miraculous Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir. No copyright intended. I do own the story line, because I made that all up with my brain.

Lights twinkle above me as I sit at a table, observing my parents sway to the music as a sweet melody plays. April winds blow all around in a comforting warmth. It's my parent's anniversary tonight, they wanted to renew their vows for the occasion. Anarka is hosting as her ship is the location for the ceremony. We cleared the deck to serve as a dance floor. The gang and I all pitched in earlier in the day to prepare for the night. My mom is in a traditional ancient Chinese kimono but white and green stitched into the fabric. I'm wearing a similar dress, only it's a light pink and red kimono with cherry blossoms and a flowing skirt, a design I made myself. My hair is down with a ribbon tying the sides back with a cherry blossom hair pin in place, my flats are off to the side. My father looking handsome in his tux, smiling down at his wife just fills my heart with joy. I can't help but smile as I watch them being so blissfully in love. 17 years old now and watching my parents gives me hope that true love is real. I was raised from it. The hopeless romantic in me swoons.

"What are you doing over here on your own?" A voice says from behind me, but I don't need to look to know that it's Luka.

"Just taking a break." I said with a sigh.

Luka pulls a chair up next to me and sits backwards on it, resting his arms on the back of the chair. He cleans up nicely, wearing a teal dress shirt that has a black fade effect as it gets closer to the ends of the main shirt, he's also wearing black ripped jeans, with black combat boots, his hair combed to the side but keeps falling in his face. Complete with his normal small gauges and wrist his shirt sleeve isn't long enough to cover the right arm sleeve tattoo he has of a snake that has roses peaking through spaces and beautiful shading to make it complete, wrapping up his arm. This is about as fancy as he dresses up, so I'm used to it. I do have to admit, he does look handsome like that, especially when he's not even trying. He's 19 now and is still pursuing music, having Jagged help him figure his career out while also still being a part of Kitty Section.

"Ah huh sure Mari. What is it really?"

I giggled, "Seriously Luka, I just wanted to sit for a minute. Alya tired me out dancing earlier, plus this is a slow song now and well, I feel like a third wheel with her and Nino. But that's okay, they needed a moment."

"Right, so did you want a drink?" He asks, holding out a glass of champagne.

I smiled and took it, we both sat there in comfortable silence for a while before I spoke up.

I smiled and sighed, "Just look at them, Luka. They way they are looking at each other like no one else is there. I hope I marry a man that loves me that much someday."

"Never know, that guy could end up being someone you already know."

I giggled, "I seriously doubt it. The one I'm after doesn't even notice me."

I said turning my attention to Adrien and Kagami slow dancing and of course as soon as I turned my head in their direction, they were kissing. Adrien has made his feelings quite clear. Still the tug of pain cliches my heart at the sight.

Luka scuffs, "Forget mister prim and proper. C'mon, let's dance. You know you can't resist me."

He wiggled his eyebrows at me and I laughed as I took his hand. We found a spot on the dance floor, he bowed to me as I curtsied. He spun me into him, making me smack against his chest, I laughed and he grinned down at me. I feel so short since I'm still barefoot, I'm only a mere 5'6" compared to his 6'3". The song playing right now is my parents' song, Can't Help Falling in Love by Elvis. I've always loved this song and it's so fitting for them, but Luka on the other hand. Being the dork he is, is singing the lyrics to me dramatically with that signature smirk on his face.

"Like a river flows surely to the sea, darling, so it goes. Some things are meant to be."

I play-hit his shoulder and laughed, "You are such a dork."

He smirked at me and spun me around, lifting my feet off the ground. I changed position and wrapped my arms around his neck as he held on to my waist. He set me down and we just swayed, smiling and getting lost in each other's eyes.

"Take my hand, take my whole life too. For I can't help falling in love with you."

He sang the next verse and I just giggled at him. He always seems to know just what to do to bring a smile to my face. I can feel the heat rising to my cheeks as I notice the intense look in his eyes at me. Is he goofing off or being serious right now? I know he's confessed feelings for me in the past but I've been so hung up on Adrien that I couldn't see myself with anyone else. We agreed to stay friends, I thought he got over me. My smile falters when he gets a little too close as if he's going to kiss me. Oh my god. He is going to kiss me.

My eyes widened as suddenly I forgot how to move, do I want him to kiss me? Part of me does, I admit. Do I have unresolved feelings for him? Absolutely. But I can't take that risk. Being Ladybug doesn't allow me to have any kind of romance, no matter how much I want it. I can't afford to go there. Flashbacks of him being akumatized into Truth wrack my mind and I move out of his embrace. I can't do that to him. Not again. Suddenly it's like all the oxygen has been taken from my lungs and I can't breathe. He looks at me concerned but I can't hear what he says, just see his lips moving. I need to get out of here.

"I need a minute." I manage to say before I run off of the house boat.

Murmurs of everyone fade in the background as I locate a dark area. My breathing increases and doesn't slow. I'm having a full blown panic attack. Tikki flies out of my purse, she looks at me, worry clear across her face.

"Marinette?" She says, concerned.

"Spots on." I say then the familiar pink glow appears before I transform.

There's something about being behind the mask that settles my breathing, calming me down. But that's short lived as I hear footsteps approaching.

"Marinette?" Luka calls my name, wide eyed at first then relaxes.

My entire body freezes. How could I have been so reckless to transform in the open like that?! Where the hell is my head at?! I grab my yo-yo instinctively, about to escape when his voice makes me pause.

"You don't have to run. I've known who you were all this time." He said softly.

I shrink back in the darkness the night's shadow provides. As he walks closer to me, looking around us to make sure there are no onlookers before he speaks again.

"Do you remember when Wishmaker was running around Paris granting everyone's childhood dream?" He said slowly.

My heart pounded as I intently listened to him, he got closer and talked in barely a whisper. My mind already connected the dots and a lump formed in my throat.

"I have to say, the Knitting Fairy is something I totally expected from you." He said with a sly smile.

I open my mouth to say something but the words die in my tongue. He cups my cheek with his hand as he wipes away my silent tears as I slowly recover from the shock.

"I've known this entire time and I haven't said a word to anyone. I would gladly give my life before giving up your identity."

I swallowed the lump in my throat as I struggled to form the words, my eyes stinging with fresh tears.

"I don't want anyone to die for me." I whispered, tears rolling down my face.

Luka just pulls me into a hug, I hug him back, holding him tight as I cry. "Spots off." I say silently then Tikki goes back to her hiding place, while I still hold on to Luka. It's as if he's my anchor tethering me to reality before I completely lose my mind under the pressure.

"Let's go back. We can talk in my room, okay? It'll give us the privacy we need." He suggested, rubbing my back.

I nodded and sniffed, collecting myself. When we got back everyone seemed to relax that I was in one piece, Luka squeezed my hand supportively and told me to go to his room. He'd take care of explaining to everyone what happened. I heard them talking as I left the deck.

"Marinette is alright, just feeling unwell. I think she had a bit too much to drink and is just embarrassed." Luka says.

"Oh my, poor Marinette." Rose says.

"Maybe it's time to call it a night and take her home Sabine." My father says to my mother.

"I agree, Tom." She said, I heard footsteps that soon stopped as Luka spoke again.

"No need, don't worry Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng. I'll look after her for the night. She can bunk with Juleka, if that's okay mom, Jules?"

"But of course. If the girl is that unwell she shouldn't be going anywhere. Best to sleep it off, we all know how it is." Anarka said to my parents, laughing.

The adults laughed, "It's alright with me too." Juleka said.

"It's settled then. Please enjoy the remainder of your party, I'll have her call you in the morning." Luka said to my parents.

Murmurs were heard all around then the sound of music filled the space, I heard Luka walking towards his room but also another set of footsteps.

"Okay, spill it Couffaine, what really happened?" Alya demanded.

"That's between us." He said, his voice irritated.

She scuffed, "You and I both know she freaked out because you tried kissing her. You have no idea how hard it is for her-"

"I think I know her more than you give me credit for. Go back to the party Alya. Nino is waiting."

"Fine. She better be alright otherwise I will kick your ass."

"I'd like to see you try." He challenged.

I heard her footsteps retreat as Luka entered the room. I was admiring his guitar pick collection before he came in, absentmindedly twisting around the one he gave me. I had made it into a bracelet with an old guitar string of his, I almost never take it off.

"Are you okay?" I asked him.

"Yeah it's just she really irks me sometimes."

I giggled, "She does have that effect on people."

He rolled his eyes, "Don't be like that. She's just looking out for me." I say, a small smile on my face.

He scoffed, "She acts as if I'll hurt you. That's what pisses me off. I would never hurt you, Marinette."

"No, you wouldn't. But I hurt you." I said quietly then looked away, out the porthole window.

He walks over and turns my face to look at him, "Marinette, I would gladly get my heart broken by you a thousand times if it meant I'd still have you in my life."

I shook my head, "No, no. You don't mean that. No one wants to be hurt. You are way too good Luka. You deserve someone that can be all in and I just can't be. I don't deserve you."

"Yes I do mean it and I don't mind a few bumps and bruises. I decide who deserves me Marinette. Nobody ever said that love was easy and that's how I feel about you. How I've felt about you since we met, even after we tried dating when we were younger and broke up. I have never stopped loving you Marinette and I know deep down, you love me too."

His sincerity nearly broke me, "Luka….I can't." I whispered.

I moved my hands out of his grasp, frustration taking over me, "You know why I couldn't then and why I can't now. Not with you, not with Adrien, not with anyone. I can't allow myself to love anyone. Hawkmoth, Monarch or whatever he wants to call himself now, will constantly be a threat hanging over my head. I can't risk it, I won't. You can't ask me to put you at risk, Luka. There's more at stake than the disaster that is my love life."

"You didn't. I'm telling you that you don't have to take on the world alone. That is way too much pressure for anyone to face by themselves and you've been doing it for years. Lean on me Mari, let me take some of that burden off your shoulders. We can take on the world together."

I bit my lip looking into his eyes, knowing that every word he spoke was the truth and held such sincerity I could melt. My chest tightened, literally aching to just give in. Lay down all my defenses and finally allow myself to feel what I've buried all these years. Allow myself this chance with him. But the fear wins. It does every time.

"I can't lose you Luka. I can't." The desperation in my voice breaks as new tears roll down my face.

"You won't." He said softly, tucking some stray hair behind my ear.

I searched his eyes unsure what I was looking for. Maybe a tell to let me know he doesn't fully understand what he's agreeing to or a way to drop this. But I don't see anything like that, just pure honesty. He's always been that way, has never lied to me and never will. That's what scares me the most, there's no way out and once we dive in there is no going back to how it used to be. We both know it. His eyes searched mine, looking at me like I was his lifeline and that was it, all it took to get me to stop denying my feelings for him. I pulled him to me and kissed him. It took him a minute to react as I kissed him by surprise but it wasn't long before I felt his smirk against my lips as his arms wrapped around me, holding me tight. My arms rest on his shoulders as my hands grip his hair, I lean in closer to him as if I couldn't get close enough. Everything else fades away as my need for him clouds my mind. Our tongues collide with each other, fighting for dominance, I bite his bottom lip before breaking the kiss. The sound of a knock on his door brings us back to reality and I move out of his embrace as the door opens, revealing Juleka holding clothes in her hands.

"Did I interrupt something?" She asks, eyebrow raised as she looks between the both of us.

Luka turned around and smiled, "Not at all Jules, we were just talking."

She pursed her lips, skeptically, before shifting her gaze on me. "I just thought you'd like a change of clothes, Marinette. How are you feeling?" She asked, brown eyes full of concern.

I take the clothes from her and smile, "Thank you Juleka, this is very thoughtful of you. I'm okay just feeling very tired." I said.

Half-truth, this whole night has exhausted me but not from the alcohol. I remind myself to yell at Luka later for that, that was the best excuse he could come up with? Making everyone and my parents believe me to be a lightweight. Rude. I only had like one drink tonight and it wasn't even that strong.

"No problem, Marinette. Everyone pretty much left for the night."

"Is it really that late already?" I asked, surprised. I hadn't even noticed how much time had passed.

"It's like 2 0'clock in the morning. Anyways, your parents send their love and hope you feel better." She explained.

"I helped mom with most of the cleaning up so you don't have to worry about it, she just went to bed not too long ago. I'll go set up the spare cot for you in my room, Marinette."

"Oh it's alright Juleka, don't go through the trouble. I can do it myself." I said.

"No, I inistit, don't worry about it. You two look like you were in the middle of a conversation so I'll leave you to it." She said with a knowing smile and quietly left Luka's room.

"Thank you, Juleka." I called after her.

Luka rubbed the back of his neck, "Damn I didn't even realize the time."

"Me either."

We stood like that in silence for a moment before I blinked, shaking my head. "I-I guess I should go change and then we should go to bed." I said, sighing.

"I agree, it's been a long night."

"Right. Goodnight Luka." I said as I started walking out of his room but his hand stopped me.

"Come back after Juleka falls asleep, we'll just sleep. I don't want to be away from you, yet." He admitted, looking down as blush dusted his cheeks.

It was nice seeing him like this, I took his hand and smiled at him, "Okay." I kissed his cheek then left his room.

I headed into the bathroom and sighed, closing the door. I started undressing the kimono of its many layers and folding them neatly on the sink. Tikki flies out from her hidden spot.

"Are you okay, Marinette?" She asks.

"I think so." I said with a sigh.

"Does this mean you and Luka are going out now?" She asked.

"I think so." I said again.

"This could be dangerous, you need to be careful Marinette. Luka knows you're Ladybug and now you might be dating him, Monarch could use him to get to you." She rambled.

"As long as my identity remains secret that won't happen. I trust Luka, he's kept it secret all this time, even from me. I'm safe with him and he's right, all of this pressure is a lot for one person to be under. I'm just one girl, Tikki, I can't keep the world from falling apart on my own."

Tikki sighed, "I know Marinette. Being Ladybug has cost you so much, I'm sorry for how much weight the responsibility has on you. I don't want to see it cost you a chance at love."

I smiled, "Oh, Tikki." I said, bringing the kwami to me in a hug.

Once I finished undressing, I put on the pajamas Juleka gave me. Just some black shorts and a purple cami tank top. I take the ribbon out of my hair and shake it out, brushing my fingers through it. I then put it up in a messy bun on top of my head and came out of the bathroom, going to Juleka's room. Juleka was so sweet to set up the spare cot for me, complete with fresh sheets and an extra pillow and comforter. I almost feel a little guilty about sneaking into her brother's bedroom later. I set my things on her purple bean bag chair and settled into the cot. While I hear the faucet running as Juleka is in the adjacent bathroom inside her bedroom. Peeking her head around the corner, toothbrush still in her mouth. The boathouse has two bathrooms, Anarka and Juleka share a bathroom in their bedrooms and the main one out in the hall where the living room is, which is the one I used.

Juleka came back into the room after brushing her teeth and sighed as she made her way over to her bed. Her bed was against the wall, complete with a black frame and headboard and a purple zebra striped comforter and sheet set. Her bathroom was to the right of her room and to the left stands a beautiful mahogany armoire, with her purple bean bag chair to the corner of the armoire's left leg. A purple oval mirror stands in between the armoire and her bathroom. She set the cot up next to her bed, underneath her porthole window. The walls of her bedroom were of deep violet and black checkers, complementing the black fluffy carpet on her floors. She has various posters on her walls of famous models and has her name in wooden letters above her headboard, painted purple of course. I smiled as I looked around, the renovations Anarka made to the boathouse over the years really paid off, they look amazing. Luka and Juleka used to share a room with a curtain between them but as they got older, adjustments had to be made. Both twins have a year on me, being 18 years old now.

"Is everything okay?" Juleka asked, pulling back her covers and settling into bed.

"Of course."

"Mhmm, okay because you don't look like someone that's hungover. Luka wouldn't lie like that unless there was a good reason. Are things between you and my brother okay?" She asked, worried.

"Never better." I said, maybe a bit too quickly to answer as I felt my cheeks heating up.

Juleka's eyes widened, "Wait, did something happen between you?"

"W-what no. Why would you think that?"

"Right and that's why I totally didn't see you two kiss when I came in earlier." She said sarcastically. Busted.

I bit my lip and she sighed, "You don't have to tell me the details, whatever is going on is yours and his business. But know that if you hurt him, I won't forgive you Marinette. You may be my friend and I do love you but he's my brother. I've seen him hurt already too many times over you and if you're stringing him along-"

"Woah, woah Juleka. I would never do that to him."

"So, you're completely over Adrien?" She questioned.

I meant to say of course but the words died before I could say them as I got lost in my thoughts. Am I?

Juleka sighed, "I thought so. My advice is think it all the way through before you go any further with my brother, okay?"

I nodded, agreeing with her as I couldn't speak.

"Goodnight, Marinette." She said then turned over in her bed, getting comfortable to sleep.

But I couldn't sleep even if I wanted to now. My thoughts taking over. Have I really gotten over Adrien? I mean I've gotten to a point where we are still good friends and I no longer stammer in front of him, or make a complete fool of myself around him. Besides, he has a girlfriend now, Kagami. Do I wish it were me instead? Yes but I'm content in knowing he's happy and my yearning for him has faded over the years, it doesn't consume me so much anymore. Can I really be over somebody I never even had a chance with? Still to this day he never knew how bad I crushed on him and he may never know. Was that all it was? A bad crush? Just some young girl's infatuation with a boy who was nice to her for one second? I sighed, as naive as I was, I already knew the answer. But what I have with Luka is different. He's my best friend, he has always been there for me. I can depend on him. I can trust him. Even when I was going on talking to him about another boy I liked all the while he had feelings for me, gave me advice on said boy and didn't even bat an eye. It was hard on him and incredibly selfish of me to do that to him knowing he liked me. Gosh, I wish I could go back in time and slap my younger self.

He never judged me and has been so incredibly patient with me as I figure my shit out. Plus he knows me, the real me. Ladybug or no Ladybug. He knows me and he hasn't told a soul and I know in my heart that he never will. He knows the risk of that all too well, who knows how many times he's had to use Second Chance to stop disaster from happening. My heart swells up and all I want to do now is go to him. I look over to check if Juleka is asleep and as soon as I hear the evenness of her breathing, I sneak out of her room and make my way to Luka's. The faint glow from under his door is all I need to know that he is awake still, waiting for me probably. I can hear the soft strumming of his guitar as I open the door, he smiles at me upon entering. He was sitting on his bed, in a black tank top and matching sweatpants, guitar in his lap, humming silently. He set the guitar down as he sat up to greet me. I sat down next to him and just let myself fall into him, he held me tight.

"What's wrong, Mari?"

I just hugged him tighter as fresh tears fell, "I'm sorry Luka. I am so, so sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

I sighed and calmed myself down as I told him about my talk with Juleka and every thought I had after, hating my younger self at the careless way I treated him. He really is too good for me, I really don't deserve him.

"She doesn't know the whole story, Marinette. If she knew how much you sacrificed being Ladybug, she would understand why you wouldn't let yourself get involved with anyone."

"It's still no excuse, Luka. She's right. I've been incredibly selfish with you, I'm so sorry. How can you forgive me so easily?" I asked him, sniffing.

"Because there is nothing to forgive. I love you, Marinette. I told you that I didn't care about getting hurt, go ahead and break my heart. It led us to this moment, right now."

I gasped at him, getting off his bed and pacing his room, "How can you say that so casually? I never wanted to hurt you, ever, but I always manage to screw things up. Realizing how much I put you through makes me feel so horrible. I have been horrible to you, Luka. You may forgive me but I don't think I can forgive myself."

He looked at me as if I punched him in the face, "What are you saying, Mari?"

I shook my head and bit my lip, "Maybe us being together is a bad idea. I'm toxic."

Luka got up and walked over to me, angry, "No you aren't. You're simply human and humans make mistakes, we are not perfect creatures. You are clumsy, sweet, amazing in everything you do and wish to achieve, and let's not forget stubborn as hell but not toxic. That word doesn't even touch you."

I blinked tears away as I looked at him, "Quit being so infuriatingly stubborn and lost in your head. You love me Marinette, you don't even have to tell me. I see it. Do you honestly want to live like this the rest of your life? Never allowing yourself love. You keep saying that you don't deserve me well, I think it's the other way around. You have such a big heart for everyone you care about, you bend over backwards and go out of your way to be a good friend, an amazing daughter and the hero Paris knows you to be. You have given up so much being Ladybug, don't give me up too."

"I don't want to." I whispered.

"Then don't." He said simply with a smile as he leaned down to kiss me.

After a moment's hesitation I returned the kiss. Luka scooped me up into his arms and ran his hands down my legs, wrapping them around him as he walked us over to his bed. Kicking the door shut and switching the light off on his way to lay me down, his lips moved from my mouth down to my neck. The only light in the room is what's reflecting off from the moon and the city lights beyond us, the dim like making him look all the more attractive. I gasped a little as I felt his hand explore the skin under my shirt, I panicked a little as I remembered that I took my bra off for bed back in Juleka's room. Having never been touched like this before is incredibly embarrassing. He's making me a nervous wreck and yet I don't want him to stop. Luka stopped kissing my neck and looked up at me, his hand stopping in place.

"Too much?" He asked.

I bit my lip, thankful for the dim lighting so he can't see the insane blush on my cheeks. "N-no it's not that."

"Then what is it?"

"I- I um, I'm not wearing a bra."

He chuckled softly, "That just means it's easy access for me." He teases, I smack his arm.

"Luka, be serious. I've never done this kinda stuff-"

"It's okay, Marinette. We can go slow. I won't do anything to you that you don't want me to." He said and I relaxed.

He kissed me again before pulling away and grabbing the covers for us. "Let's just get some sleep, okay? There will be plenty of time for us to do that later."

I nodded and sighed as he settled in behind me, wrapping me in his arms as we lay down in his bed.

Out of curiosity I asked, "What things do you want to do to me?"

He chuckled, "I'm afraid I'd make that innocent mind of yours explode if I told you that."

I jabbed him in the ribs with my elbow and pouted. He chuckled and settled down. He muttered about me being feisty as I snuggled into him, getting lost in his minty and rain scent enveloping me as I fell asleep.