Author's Note:
Hello! As always, I appreciate you sticking with me and reviewing! Keep it up, please!
We're back with Bella here after Edward got the call that Tanya has passed away, so let's see what happens.
I don't own Twilight or any of these lovely characters.
Chapter 23
BPOV
I stood in my underwear in the middle of Edward's bedroom for several minutes, trying to figure out what had just happened. I knew he was somewhat in shock. I was too, but his abrupt departure had surprised me a little. I knew he hadn't meant anything by it, so I wasn't hurt really, just surprised. I also knew the next few days were bound to be a little crazy, so I decided to head home. I got dressed and looked around Edward's room to make sure I hadn't left anything out. I kept a few things in one of his drawers for the occasional nights I got to spend with him, but I knew he'd have people in and out of his house in the coming days, so I wanted to make sure there was no trace of my presence. Finding none in the bedroom, I double checked the bathroom and made a sweep through the rest of the house as well. I picked up a few of Maggie's things and tossed them in her room, just to save Edward the trouble later. I knew he'd be exhausted whenever he got home. Once I was satisfied nothing was out of place, I locked up and drove home.
Back in my own house, I headed upstairs, hoping to catch a few more hours of sleep. I was thankful it was Saturday, and I didn't have to be at work in a few short hours, but I knew I'd be hearing from Edward when he was able to call, and I also wondered if I'd receive a hysterical phone call from Alice. I lay in my bed and couldn't help wishing Edward were beside me. Of course, that was nothing new. I always wanted him with me, but I knew the next several days would be some of the hardest we'd faced, and I couldn't help but want just a little more time before we were separated for a while.
Resigned to not getting what I wanted and resolved to support Edward in whatever way he needed me in the coming days, I rolled over and tried to clear my mind for sleep. It didn't come however, because shoving thoughts of Edward and everything else out of the way just allowed the emotions over Tanya's death warring within me to flood in. First and foremost, I was relieved, mostly for Tanya. Despite our history, I'd never wished anything bad for her, and I was grateful she could now rest in peace. I was also relieved that Edward and I could move forward, not right away I knew, but perhaps there was a light at the end of the tunnel. I was sad as well, as death is never an easy thing, regardless of the circumstances. A tear slipped down my cheek at the loss of someone I had once considered a friend, as well as for her parents and all the people that had cared about her.
I must have dozed off finally, because the sensation of the bed dipping behind me woke me up. I glanced groggily at the clock to see that it was just before five a.m. just as an arm draped over my waist and pulled me back into a warm body. I looked over my shoulder and Edward kissed me on the forehead.
"Hey," I said sleepily, "What are you doing here?"
"You weren't there when I got home, and I missed you."
"I'm sorry, I just thought it was better if I got out of the way. I know you'll have people in and out and the next few days will be crazy," I told him.
"Yeah, they will be," he sighed. "I also came to apologize for leaving the way I did earlier. I didn't mean to brush you off. I think I was a little bit in shock, but that's still no excuse for treating you that way."
"Edward, it's fine. I wasn't upset. I know this is the last thing either of us expected."
"Yeah, which now that I think about it is crazy. Why didn't I expect it? I mean, you know as well as I do that her health has gone downhill the last couple of years. So, this shouldn't have been this much of a shock."
"Well, maybe so, but it's not like she'd been so sick that death seemed imminent. But anyway, we'll get through it. I'm here for you, whatever you need. I know we won't have any time together for a bit, but I understand and will support you in any way I can," I said.
"Thanks, baby. I love you," Edward said and kissed me on the head.
"I love you, too," I said.
"I don't have much time, but I just want to hold you while I can," Edward said, pulling me as close as he could.
A couple of hours later, I was awoken again by the buzzing of Edward's phone alarm. I'd turned in my sleep, so we were face to face and he groaned as he tried to extricate himself from our tangled limbs. Edward reached for his alarm and shut it off, then slipped out of bed. I raised up on an elbow and watched as he pulled on his jeans and sweatshirt.
"Go back to sleep, baby," he said. "It's still early."
"I know, and I will, but I'll make you some coffee before you go," I said, starting to get out of bed.
"No, don't worry about it. I'm heading straight to my parents and Mom will have some ready when I get there," he said, then dropped back down on the bed and laid beside me with an anguished look on his face. "I have to talk to Maggie. How am I supposed to tell her?"
"I don't know, but I have faith you'll know what to say when you get there. Your parents will help you."
"I know. Is it wrong that I wish you could be with me?"
"No, you know I'd love nothing more than to be there for both you and Maggie, but we both know me showing up at your parents' house with you at seven in the morning wouldn't be a good idea," I told him.
"Yeah, I know. Doesn't change the fact that I want you there, though," he said, then sighed. "I better get going. I want to get there and talk to Maggie before the Denalis arrive. They're going to stay with my parents."
"Okay. I know you'll have a lot going on for a few days, so I'll talk to you whenever you have time. Get some sleep when you can. I love you."
"I love you. And I'll call as soon as I can," he promised then kissed me quickly before climbing out of bed. "Get some more rest, beautiful."
I fell back to sleep soon after Edward left, but I was up for good a little before nine. I'd just poured a cup of coffee when my phone rang. I grabbed it and swiped to answer when I saw Rose's name on the screen.
"Hey Rose," I answered.
"Hey, Bells," she greeted. "How are you?"
"I'm okay. Worried about Edward and Maggie. Are you at Carlisle and Esme's?" I asked.
"Yeah, we just got here a few minutes ago. Tanya's parents are here, and everyone is doing okay. I don't think Maggie really knows what to think. I think she's sad because everyone else is, but she wasn't really attached to Tanya, you know?" Rose said.
"Yeah, I know. I'm just hoping this isn't too hard on her. That's Edward's main concern," I said, and Rose hummed in agreement. I couldn't help my curiosity, so I asked, "Are Alice and Jasper there yet?"
"Yeah, they're here. Alice is hysterical of course," Rose said, and I could practically hear her rolling her eyes.
"I'm not surprised," I said.
"Yeah, well, that's why I'm calling. I'm supposedly breaking the news to you," she said pointedly, and I immediately understood.
"Oh no. What happened?"
"Nothing really, but Esme asked if anyone had called you yet, and Alice immediately looked at Edward. Of course, he didn't say anything, but you know how Alice is, so I jumped in and said I'd call you. So, consider yourself informed. Also, Esme told me to invite you over. She's fixing lunch for everyone," Rose said.
"Yeah, I don't really think that's a good idea. I don't want to offend the Denalis, but I'm afraid my presence would just set Alice off. But then I'm afraid it will look more like I have something to hide if I don't come. What do you think?"
"Unfortunately, I agree with you about Alice. As much as the rest of us would love to have you here, the look on her face when she looked at Edward earlier tells me she's primed to make a scene. I think it would be worse if you came. I can pass along your condolences to Carmen and Eleazar and tell them you'll see them at the funeral, but can't make it today," Rose offered.
"Yeah, I think that's the lesser of two evils. Thanks, Rose," I said.
"No problem. I got you, babe," Rose said. We chatted for another minute and then signed off.
The next couple of days were long. I missed Edward, but I understood that he was busy. I'd talked to him a couple of times and we'd texted regularly, but with Tanya's parents in town and making funeral arrangements, he hadn't been able to get away. The funeral was scheduled for Tuesday, so Monday at work, I made sure I didn't have any pressing deadlines or anything and all my loose ends were tied up. I wanted to be able to take the next day off and not worry about anything else.
Tuesday finally arrived and I dressed for the day in a charcoal sweater dress with black tights and boots. Knowing it would be an emotional day, I kept my makeup light and curled my hair. I arrived at the funeral home for the memorial service a few minutes before ten. A minute after I entered, Maggie ran up and threw her arms around my waist.
"Bella!" she cried, and I bent to hug her.
"Hi, sweet girl," I said.
"I've missed you, Bella. I haven't seen you in so many days."
"I've missed you, too, but I'm here now," I said.
"You come sit with me," Maggie said and pulled me with her toward the chapel where the visitation and memorial service were being held.
"We can sit for a minute, but I won't be able to sit with you during the service, okay? You'll sit with your daddy and the rest of the family in a little while and I'll have to move back," I told her, trying to prepare her to avoid her getting upset when the service started. She simply nodded and pulled me to a pew at the back of the chapel and told me all about what she'd been up to the last few days.
The next hour and a half were long and emotional. I'd talked with Tanya's parents and other family friends before the service and I'd tried to talk to Alice, but she'd been inconsolable and stayed in the corner with Jasper comforting her. I didn't want to cause a scene, so I'd simply steered clear. I knew everyone was invited back to Carlisle and Esme's for lunch after the funeral, so I decided I'd try again when we got there. I didn't want things to be so awkward between us forever, but I wasn't going to force her to talk to me. Not today, anyway.
After the service, most of the guests made their way to the Cullen's house. Esme had hired a caterer to bring in lunch, so she didn't have to worry about cooking for so many people. I'd greeted the family at the funeral home but hadn't had a whole lot of time to visit, so I made the rounds again once we were all at the house. I hugged Edward, but of course we didn't linger. I was talking with Eleazar, and he was reminiscing about something Tanya, Alice, and I had done shortly after they'd moved to Forks. He and I both laughed at the retelling of the story, then our attention was drawn to the corner not far from where we were standing. Alice was there and had been quietly crying like she had been non-stop since I'd first seen her earlier, but she let out a wail at the sound of our laughter. Eleazar turned back to me and shook his head.
"That girl, I swear. I'm glad my Tanya had such a loyal friend, but Alice has always been the dramatic sort," he said quietly, but affectionately.
I simply nodded, not knowing how else to respond and was relieved when Eleazar caught the eye of someone else and wandered off to visit. I looked back over toward Alice and decided to try and comfort her. I wasn't sure where Jasper was and I couldn't just walk away from her, so I made my way over and sat in the chair next to her. I laid my hand gently on her shoulder and she looked up at me with tears running down her face.
"Alice," I began hesitantly. I didn't really know what to say. "I'm sorry. I know you miss her. We all do, but Tanya wouldn't want you to be so upset. Is there anything I can do?"
"No. There's nothing you or anyone can do to bring her back. And don't you tell me what Tanya would have wanted. You're happy she's gone," she hissed quietly. I was grateful she didn't yell.
"I'm not happy, Alice," I said carefully, not wanting to argue with her.
"You were laughing," she sniffled.
"We were remembering some of our antics back in high school. Just talking about good memories, which I think Tanya would have wanted. I'm sorry she's gone, but she's at peace now."
"Whatever. Don't pretend like you care now. You aren't fooling me" Alice said with venom in her voice, then turned away from me. I sighed and stood up to move away from her. I knew I'd never convince her otherwise, and now wasn't the time to push. I passed Jasper on his way back to Alice carrying a plate.
"Hey Bell," he said and hugged me with his free arm.
"Hey, Jasper. She been like this since Saturday?" I asked quietly.
He glanced over at Alice and shrugged. "Yeah, pretty much. She talk to you?"
"Not really. Accused me of being happy Tanya's gone. I'm not going to push her; I was just hoping she'd come around a little."
"Yeah, you and me both," he said sadly, then squeezed my shoulder briefly before making his way back to his wife.
A little while later, guests had started to trickle out. Edward had been posted by the door thanking people for coming for a while and he looked exhausted. I knew the last few days had taken a toll on him and I wished there was something I could do, but he'd assured me anytime we talked that there was nothing. We hadn't talked today at all, other than the formal pleasantries people share at a funeral. I had a headache brewing, so I slipped down the hall to Carlisle's study, hoping a few quiet minutes would help relieve some of the tension. I sat down on the leather sofa and rubbed my temples for a minute, then simply laid my head back on the sofa and closed my eyes, enjoying the silence. I heard the door open a few minutes later and looked over to see Rose in the doorway.
"You okay?" she asked.
"Yeah, just a headache, so I was looking for quiet for a few minutes. Care to join me?"
"Nah, I was actually on my way to check on the kids, but I saw you sneak in here."
"Oh okay, well, I'll be out in a few," I told her, and she quietly retreated and closed the door.
I'd just laid my head back again when I heard the door open a second time. "Forget something?" I asked without opening my eyes, assuming it was Rose again.
"Nope, just looking for a quiet spot and you. Glad to see I get both at the same time," Edward said as I jerked my head up at the sound of his voice.
"Hey," I said softly as he dropped down beside me. "How are you holding up?"
"I'm okay. Just tired. Too many people for too long," he said, then reached for my hand and threaded our fingers together.
"I can imagine," I said sympathetically.
Edward raised our joined hands and kissed my fingers. "I've missed you the last few days," he said.
"Me, too, but things will settle down after today."
"Yeah, I know," he said with a sigh. "Is it wrong that I wish this changed things for us immediately?"
"No, I know what you mean, but we both know it's best if we lay low for a while longer," I said.
"Yeah," he agreed, then trailed off. We sat quietly for a few minutes, then Edward stood up and said, "Well, I can't disappear for long. I guess I better get back out there."
"Okay," I said, standing up to hug him. "I'll be out in a few minutes."
"Okay," he pulled me into his arms and held me for just a moment, then kissed me lightly on the lips. Just as our lips parted, we heard a gasp behind us. Edward quickly released me, and we turned toward the door, only to come face to face with the last person we wanted to see. Alice was standing there, mouth agape and tears running down her face.
"Fuck," Edward whispered as Alice's eyes narrowed. Jasper slipped into the room behind her and closed the door just as Alice snapped.
"Oh my God, I fucking knew it!" she screeched.
"Alice, please, now is not the time or the place," Edward pleaded.
"It sure as hell is!" she yelled, coming toward us. She poked Edward in the chest when she reached him. "How long have you been fucking her, Edward?"
Before Edward or I could respond, Jasper cut in. "Ali, darlin', we can all talk about this later. There are still a few people here, including Tanya's parents. Now is not the time."
"Did you know about this?" she demanded as she whirled to her husband.
"No, he didn't know, Alice. Please calm down," I pleaded.
"You have no right to ask anything of me, whore," Alice sneered, just as the door opened. I heard Edward sputter beside me, but before he could say anything we were interrupted.
"Whoa, what is going on in here?" Carlisle asked after he slipped into the room.
"Why don't you ask your son and his whore," Alice said scornfully.
"Alice, that is enough," Carlisle said sharply. "You will not speak to your brother or Bella that way."
"But it's true!" Alice yelled. "I walked in, and they were all over each other."
"No, we weren't," I said wearily.
"Shut up, whore," Alice replied, causing Edward's head to snap up from where he'd been pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Alice, enough. You will not talk to her that way again," Edward growled.
"You're no better, Edward. In fact, I think Carmen and Eleazar would be very interested to know just what their precious son-in-law has been up to," Alice said in a threatening tone.
"What purpose would that serve, Alice?" Edward questioned.
"They deserve to know what a terrible husband you were to Tanya. You always treated her terribly. And they also deserve to know what kind of man is raising their granddaughter," Alice said haughtily.
"Alice, that's bullshit, and you know it. Edward is a good man and a wonderful father. You need to leave Maggie out of this," I snapped. Edward reached down and grabbed my hand, giving it a squeeze, in comfort or thanks, I wasn't sure.
"Alice," Edward said calmly. "I've told you before you don't know anything about my relationship with Tanya and you sure as hell don't know anything about Bella and me. Please let this go for now and let's just get through this day."
"If I'm so clueless, then why don't you enlighten me? If you're so fucking perfect, then tell me how I'm so wrong about you," Alice demanded.
Edward dragged his free hand through his hair and sighed. "There's no point in dredging up the past at this point," he told her. I couldn't help feeling a little disappointed that he was still protecting Tanya, but I also knew that Alice wouldn't believe a word he had to say so there really was no point.
"Look," Edward continued. "I've never once claimed to be perfect, but I wasn't the shit husband you seem to think I was to Tanya. I don't know what she used to tell you, but I can assure you that the only thing I was guilty of in that marriage was actually being in it. I never loved Tanya the way a husband should love his wife, but I did care for her. And until recently, I was always faithful. I know you don't believe me, and I know you don't care, but I love Bella. Neither of us are proud of the way things have played out and neither of us would have entered this relationship if the circumstances had been different. We certainly never wanted you to find out like this, but it doesn't change my feelings. I love her and I want to be with her, and you aren't going to change that." Edward glanced back at me and slipped his arm around my waist. "We understand it will take time, but we hope that eventually you can be happy for us."
Alice regarded us for a moment with tears in her eyes, and I felt a little kernel of hope bloom in my heart. I glanced at Edward to see him watching her hopefully as well. She took a deep breath and then spoke in a low voice.
"I will never be happy about the fact that you fucked around on my best friend. Tanya never did anything to deserve this, and I will not stand by and let it continue. She may be gone now, but I will never forget and neither of you deserve happiness after what you've done to her. So, you have a choice, brother dear. You end this 'relationship' now," she said, complete with air quotes, "or I walk out there right now and tell Eleazar and Carmen everything. And I'll see to it that they file for custody of Maggie."
I heard a gasp, but I wasn't sure if it was my own or someone else's. I'd never seen Alice so cold, and I couldn't believe I'd called this person my best friend for most of my life. Tears welled in my eyes, and the last thing I wanted to do was give Alice her way, but I turned toward Edward to do just that. My heart was already breaking, but I couldn't let her threaten Maggie. Before I could say anything, though, Esme spoke. I hadn't even realized she had come into the room.
"Mary Alice Cullen, I am utterly ashamed of the way you have treated this family lately and I will not stand for it any longer. Your behavior has been abhorrent for months, but this is the final straw. You will not threaten your brother, your niece, or Bella. This stops now," she snapped with fire in her eyes, then turned toward Edward. "Now, I came in here to let you know that everyone except Carmen and Eleazar are gone, but they are getting ready to leave. You'll need to go tell them goodbye." Edward nodded, but Alice's voice cut off any response he might have made.
"You're ashamed of me?" Alice screeched at her mother. "What you should be ashamed of is Edward's behavior. And your precious Bella's. If you condone their behavior, then you're no better than they are. Since adultery is so acceptable in your eyes, I have to wonder, Mother, how many times have you broken your own vows to Daddy?"
Esme gasped and Carlisle stepped toward his daughter. "That is more than enough, Alice," he roared. "You will not speak to your mother or anyone else in this family that way. Do I make myself clear?"
My eyes popped open wide. Carlisle never raised his voice. I'd never even seen him angry, but he looked downright menacing as he stared down at his daughter and wrapped an arm around his sobbing wife. Alice just stared back at him defiantly but didn't say anything. Edward turned to me, kissed me lightly on the cheek, and murmured an apology in my ear.
"Alice, come on, this is ridiculous," Jasper said angrily, causing Alice to whirl on him. I tuned them out when Edward turned to me and kissed me lightly on the lips.
"I'm sorry, baby. I need to go say goodbye to them, but I'll be right back," he said softly in my ear, then left the room, shooting a look at his father who was still staring Alice down.
I knew I was on the verge of losing it and I needed desperately to get out of there. I loved this family as if they were my own and I couldn't bear to tear them apart any longer. I stepped forward and stopped in front of Carlisle and Esme.
"I'm truly sorry, for everything. I never meant to harm your family," I said sadly, then walked to the door. I turned back briefly when Esme said my name, but I just shook my head and slipped out of the room. The last thing I saw before I closed the door was the triumphant look on Alice's face.
Trying to control the sob threatening to tear from my throat, I ran to the front door. Rose was walking out of the kitchen and caught my eye before I'd made my escape.
"What's wrong?" she asked, alarmed. I shook my head, unable to speak through my tears. I stumbled through the door, but righted myself on the porch and ran toward my car. I couldn't think much past getting away, but I knew my house wasn't going to be far enough. I needed to be able to clear my head and get through the first days without Edward in a space that I didn't associate with him. As I drove toward home, it dawned on me that home was exactly what I needed. Not my house in Seattle, but home in Forks.
With a plan in mind, I pulled up to my house, and ran inside. I quickly changed into comfortable clothes and pulled out my suitcase. Just as I began throwing clothes and toiletries inside, my doorbell rang. My first thought was Edward, but he had a key and would likely have let himself in, so I jogged down the stairs and yanked the door open. I was relieved to see Rose, but when she opened her arms and pulled me into them, the floodgates opened. I'd kept the bulk of my tears at bay, but I couldn't any longer.
"What happened?" Rose asked.
"Edward didn't tell you? Then why are you here?"
"I didn't see Edward. I just saw your face, so I followed you after you ran out. Tell me what happened."
I pulled Rose up the stairs to my bedroom, and I told her what had happened from the moment Alice had stepped into the study. I cursed myself for my stupidity in getting caught with Edward, but it had been such a brief exchange. We'd been so careful all day, but all it took was a split second and Alice's impeccable timing to shatter my world. Rose listened in silence until I was finished.
"Oh my God. I can't believe Alice would say those things. Not only to you and Edward, but to Esme as well. But honey, you don't have to leave. Everything will be okay," she said reassuringly.
"No, it won't, Rose. You didn't see her face. She will stop at nothing at this point to destroy Edward and me both. I can't let her tear apart the entire family and I won't let her hurt Maggie in any way. The only way I can protect the people I love is to walk away. She'll get over it if I'm out of the picture."
"Bella, please calm down. Edward loves you and he won't let you walk away. And no judge is going to take Maggie away, even if the Denalis did try to get custody," Rose said.
"It doesn't matter, I've done too much damage already," I said as I zipped my suitcase.
I went into my office and grabbed my laptop and then went back to the bedroom to get my suitcase. Rose trailed behind me, trying to convince me to stay, but I knew it was best if I got out of the way. Edward and his family could heal if I was out of the picture.
"Rose, you know Alice won't let this go unless she gets her way. I don't want to go, but I have to. I can't let her tear apart the whole family," I said as I lugged my bags down the stairs.
"Well, where are you going? How long will you be gone?"
"I don't know how long. I'll be in touch at some point, but I have to go, Rose."
She nodded, knowing she couldn't change my mind, then hugged me one last time before she left. Once Rose was gone, I made a quick sweep through the house to ensure nothing needed to be dealt with before I left for an extended period of time. I hadn't lied to Rose. I didn't know how long I'd be gone. I could work from anywhere if I had to, so I could stay out of town long enough to figure out where to go from here.
I locked the house, then I loaded my bags into my car and began the drive. I did my best to keep my mind blank, not wanting to risk an accident if I became too emotional. I was an hour into my drive when Edward called the first time, but I didn't answer. I heard my phone signal a text message, but I ignored it as well as I did the several times he tried to call after that. Finally, hours later, I was relieved to see the warm light glowing from my parents' home. Suddenly exhausted, I climbed from the car and knocked on the door. The surprise was evident on Charlie's face when he pulled the door open, but he immediately knew something was wrong and with no questions asked, he opened his arms. I fell into them with a sob, and he drew me into the house and sat down on the couch beside me. Sue came in and sat on the other side of me and held my hand until my tears subsided.
"What happened, sweetheart?" Sue asked. I didn't really want to get into it, but I knew I owed them an explanation, so I told them everything. They listened patiently, murmuring disbelief at Alice's behavior. When I was finished telling them the story, Charlie kissed me on the head and offered to bring my bags in from the car. When he left the room, Sue hugged me again.
"It will all be okay, Bella," she said soothingly.
"I don't see how it can be. I just can't let her tear apart their whole family," I said.
"I seriously doubt Esme and Carlisle will take what Alice says to heart. They aren't stupid and they aren't blind, Bella. Whether they knew about you and Edward or not, they aren't vindictive people. They won't want to punish you or Edward, and they will not allow their daughter's tantrum to dictate their lives. And that's all this is, a tantrum. Alice was always a high-strung child and used to getting her way. This is on a larger scale, but it amounts to the same thing. Whatever her motives are concerning Tanya, she is still just a spoiled brat throwing a fit because someone didn't do what she thought they should. So, please don't despair. I have a feeling it will all work out," Sue said.
I shrugged, wanting to believe her, but not entirely convinced as Charlie came back in and carried my bags upstairs to my old room. Sue stood and pulled me to my feet. "Now, come upstairs and lie down. You're exhausted."
I just nodded and followed her to my bedroom where I allowed her to tuck me in like a child. I was asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.
Author's Note:
Well, they got caught by Alice….who saw that coming? And of course she threw a fit and still thinks Tanya could do no wrong.
Lots to come in the next chapter where we'll be back with Edward. I won't make you wait long for it!
Let me know what you think!