After the lieutenant went back inside, Sharon found herself walking over to the side of the building to stare out into the LA skyline. She loved the view from her office, but she loved the openness of the terrace more. The wind had picked up a bit, so she wrapped her arms around herself to try and warm up, but it was no use. Along with a shiver, she felt the forming of her tears as the past few days replayed in her head. Wanting to adopt Rusty. The end of her marriage. Jack fighting the divorce and questioning her and Andy. Andrea asking the same thing. Andy's words in the elevator. Jack's counter offer and that damn picture. The talk with Lieutenant dancing around whatever she and Andy were. All of it. Everything finally hit her all at once and knowing she was alone, she finally released the tears that she had been holding back for days.
Andy had watched from the door the moment the damn broke. It took everything in him to not run to her, but he remembered Andrea's words. "Sharon doesn't need a hero. She doesn't want a hero. She just wants you, Andy." So he stood there, waiting for her to work out whatever war that she was fighting within herself before going to her. When he saw her wipe some of her tears away, he figured it was safe to approach her.
"I'm fine," she sniffled, not even turning around as she heard his footsteps. She knew it was only a matter of time before he found her anyway. "You shouldn't have come up here. You didn't need to come up here."
"Now who's the liar. You know, it's okay not to be okay. It's called being human." He had reached out to touch her, but he was taken aback when she brushed him off rather harshly. "Hey, I get that things are all over the place right now, but don't push me away. Why won't you just let me in?"
"Because I can't, Andy! This is my fight and my fight alone. There's nothing you can do for me on this. You don't always have to swoop in to try and save the day. I don't need you for that."
"I know you don't want a hero! Dammit, Sharon, you don't have to keep reminding me! The only thing I'm doing is trying to be the friend that you've asked me to be."
She was startled at how he raised his voice, but it was the word 'friend' that had her spinning around. "Friends? Is that what we are?" She had taken a few steps closer to him, almost as if she were challenging him. "Is that all we are?"
"Oh, no! You don't get to turn that around on me! You've made that point perfectly clear and I've done my best to stay on my side of the line that you drew! You don't get to question me on anything! So I'll just continue to stand by your side like the trusty little lapdog you've trained me to be!"
"You know what, we're not doing this. Not now and definitely not here. I thought you understood how things needed to be, but I guess I was wrong. My mistake, lieutenant. I'll see you tomorrow." As she pushed past him to head back inside, a new wave of tears threatened to fall, but she needed to be inside before she'd allow them to come.
"Yeah, okay." he nodded. "That's fine. It seems to me like you don't want to do this at all, so don't worry. Just forget about all of it. Have a good night, Captain," he said as he turned and walked the opposite way. He knew what turning his back to her would cost, but holding on to something that would never happen hurt even worse. He was letting her go.
The first time she and Andy severed their friendship was hard. While he didn't turn his back to her, they knew that trying to hold onto each other was never going to work. Their mutual goodbye stung, but she made it through. They both did. Now here she is, standing on the roof of the PAB, and she's watching him walk away without a second glance. Even Jack walking away never hurt this bad and that's what makes all of this even worse. "I'm sorry," she whispered to herself with tears in her eyes. Sharon gave herself a moment before heading back inside, but when she got to the door, it was stuck. She had pulled on it a few times, but it didn't budge. When she reached into her pocket to find her phone to call for help, she realized she didn't have it. "This is not happening!" she shouted out loud. Andy must have heard her because he immediately came jogging over. Before he could get out a word, Sharon attacked him. "What did you do to the door?"
"Woah! You're asking me what I did to the door? Why are you assuming that it was me that did something? Maybe you did something to it!"
"Andy," she stomped. "I didn't do anything to do the door. You came out long after I did and you and I are the only two people up here. You had to have done something to it when you came out!" She tried puling on it again, but it was clearly locked. "This is ridiculous. Just call someone to come open it. I left my phone on my desk."
"Gladly. I'm not in the mood to get yelled at for anything else that goes wrong today." As he patted himself down to check what pocket his phone was in, he quickly realized that he didn't have it. "Yeah, about that. It looks like I don't have my phone either."
"Andy, that's not funny. Just call downstairs and have someone come get us."
"I'm not trying to be funny! Sharon, I really don't have my phone."
"Stop joking! I've had a terrible day and I just want to go home!" Sharon immediately took a step forward and began patting him down to check to see if he was telling the truth. It wasn't until she had leaned her body completely into his to reach around to stick her hands in his back pockets that she realized exactly what she had done. She quickly removed her hands and turned to walk away in a huff, but it was only to hide the blush that was written all over her face.
As he watched her walk away, he couldn't help but smile as to how flustered she truly was. Sharon didn't blush. She also rarely got flustered. He could've gone after her to tease her about it, but he decided against it. She really was having a bad day. Instead, he removed his jacket and started walking towards her. It was already chilly, but the wind had picked up a bit more making the temperature drop a bit. Andy hesitated. It's not like he's never offered her his jacket before, and she takes it pretty much every time, but this time felt different with everything hanging over them. She must not have heard him walk over because she was clearly startled when he draped his jacket over her. "Here," he said. "You need this more than I do." As he slid his hands down her arms, he had to fight the urge to wrap them around her as well.
"It's not that cold, Andy. I'm fine, really."
"I can see you shaking. Just take the jacket, Sharon."
"Thank you," she whispered. When she turned around to apologize for assuming he did something to the door, she found that he had already started to walk away. With his hands in his pockets and his head hanging down, it was a dead give away as to how upset he was. He didn't deserve her ire. Slipping her hands into the sleeves, she couldn't help but be comforted by the fact that it was still warm. As she drew the lapels of his jacket tighter to stave off the wind, she inhaled and smiled. She'd always loved his cologne. Sharon followed him with her eyes as he sat down on one of the benches. Andy immediately hunched over, leaning his elbows on his knees, with his hands clasped tightly in front of him. That was his thinking pose. He'd done it for years. If she watched long enough, he'd look up, take a deep breath, then go right back to staring at whatever spot on the ground he had focused on. She smiled when he had done it right on cue. She should've known that he would give her his jacket. He could be so unbelievably predictable, all while being incredibly sweet, which is something Sharon found great comfort in. The jacket was just another thing to add to the ever growing list of ways he cares for her.
The pack of Twizzlers waiting on her desk when she got back from her budget meetings was something she noticed. He started doing it when he caught her practically gnawing through a pen cap one night. 'Pretty sure these taste better than the pen cap. Plus you can't crack a tooth on these.' Was what the first note said. She'd know that perfect catholic school boy handwriting anywhere. The funny thing is, Andy hates Twizzlers, but still buys them for her because he knows they're her favorite. He knew that she wasn't a big soda drinker, remembered it from their patrol days. But if she was having a particularly bad day, she would always buy a Cherry Dr. Pepper as a pick me up. She told him it was something her father did for her mother when she was having a bad day, so she picked up the habit herself. When Sharon walked into her office the morning of her second day in command of Major Crimes, she found a glass-bottled 6-pack of it sitting on her desk with a note attached. 'Welcome to the team, Captain.' She didn't have to question who it was from. And somehow, Andy still remembered just how much she hates blue cheese dressing with her spicy wings. Jack never remembered because, well, he just didn't care since the blue cheese was his preference. He never even bothered to ask for a ranch dressing for her either. But anytime the Major Crimes team wen't to Mulcahey's, it was Andy that made sure there wasn't an ounce of blue cheese anywhere near her and always made sure he got her extra ranch.
If they were stuck working on a Monday night, Andy always redirected anyone that would go looking for her. Monday nights were for Emily. It was the one night a week that she wasn't performing, so Sharon always made a point to set aside time for her. The calls were brief while she was at work, especially if they ended up out in the field, but Andy knew how precious even a few minutes on the phone could be. The questions people had for their captain could wait, the mom that needed to hear her daughter's voice, even if only for a moment, was more important. She'd never asked him to do it. She's never asked him to do any of it. It's just another thing that makes her see just how amazing he is. She could go on and on reflecting on all the ways he cares for her, but she'd end up lost in thought for days. He truly is one of the best men she's ever known.
He wasn't wrong when he said that she loves him. Of course she loves him. At one point in her life he was her best friend. Then everything got turned upside down and they lost something that was incredibly precious to both of them. Now, here they are, picking up right where they left off, almost as if nothing had ever happened. Sure, it took over twenty years and countless screaming matches to fix it, but at least things were fixed.
She loves him. So why couldn't she let him in?
He waited. Of course he waited. That's all he does is wait for her. Sharon knew it was unfair to him, that she was being unfair to him. But how could she cross that line if she wasn't even sure that she had anything left to offer? Admitting to anyone that Jack broke her was hard enough, but admitting to herself that Andy could be the one that puts her back together was even harder.
The war between her mind and her heart was still raging, but her heart was beginning to pull ahead. She loves him and she realizes now that she's more than halfway in love with him. So why couldn't she let go of all the possible ways that things could go wrong instead of embracing everything that could go right? My god, this was such a mess.
She wants him. All of him. And maybe, just maybe, she should tell him that. First she needs to apologize for blaming him for the stupid door. So many thoughts were running through her head as she walked over to him, but none more important than trying to fix the mess that they are. The fact that he barely acknowledged her as she stood in front of him showed her just how much he was hurting and that's something that she's never wanted to do. Before she could say anything, Andy began to speak.
"You were right, I shouldn't have come up here. You obviously came up here to get away from everyone and everything, and me pushing you didn't help. You have every right to be angry and frustrated, especially with me."
"No," she shook her head. "I don't. I'm not angry with you, Andy. I'm angry at myself." Sharon paused to take a deep breath to organize her thoughts in a way that would make sense. "Everything hit me all at once and I took it out on you. Yelling at you over the door is a lame excuse for everything else that I've been avoiding. It was stupid, much like this entire day, and I'm so incredibly sorry for all of it. Especially for realizing that you deserve so much better than this." You deserve so much better than me, she thought to herself. She tried to look him in the eye, but couldn't, so she slightly turned her head to the side to hide all of the emotions behind her own eyes.
There it was. He heard what she was saying. He also saw it written all over her face. "How about you let me decided what I do and don't deserve." She wasn't just apologizing for the door. She was apologizing for them, or for not being a them. "When I said I'd wait, I meant it. However you need me, whenever you need me, I'm here. You just need to tell yourself that it's okay to let me in. There's nothing wrong with falling apart because everything hit you all at once. Like I said before, it's called being human. You should try it sometime."
"I thought I wasn't human," she smirked. "I've had many a nickname over the years, many of which were thought of and spread around the LAPD by you, but human was never one of them. I think your particular favorite was Wicked Witch."
"Oh, I still think you're the Wicked Witch, that will never change. You just happen to be my favorite witch. I'm just glad you traded in the broom for heels and got rid of the hat. I couldn't look into those perfect green eyes of yours with the hat on and the broom just didn't do anything for me the way the heels do." The squinty-eye look and foot stomp happened just as he predicted. "You're adorable when you stomp your foot, you know that?" He chuckled and gave her that sly grin that he knew she fell for every single time.
"No, Andy. Please. Keep talking. This is making me feel so much better," Sharon deadpanned. But as she turned to walk away, she felt his hand immediately grab for hers to pull her back toward him. When he stood up, Andy placed his other hand on her cheek, gently caressing away one of the errant tears that had finally fallen. "Andy, don't," she whispered as she leaned into his hand. She thought about pushing him away, but it was pointless. This - they - were inevitable and it no longer made sense to fight it. It was already too much, this feeling that he set off inside her, but Sharon knew it was something she'd never get enough of. Something she's wanted for as long as she could remember. She smiled as she grabbed a hold of his tie. She's always had a thing for his ties. "Perhaps there's a better word you can use. Not really a fan of the word adorable."
"My apologies, beautiful. I left my thesaurus next to my phone. Please excuse my poor choice of wording." Letting go of her hand and placing his on her other cheek, he studied her. She was the most exquisite woman that he had ever laid eyes on and he'd use every word he could think of to let her know exactly how he saw her. "Drop dead gorgeous is a personal favorite of mine. Or would you prefer breathtaking? What about stunning? Or, how about…" but he was interrupted when she tugged on his tie to bring him down to her.
"Or how about you just shut up and kiss me?"
Andy didn't need to be told twice. Especially when Sharon reached up with her free hand to scrape her nails against the back of his neck. He already knew, long before this moment, that the second he had his mouth on hers that he'd be done for. He's wanted her to be his last first kiss for longer than he can remember and finally being here with her was more than he ever could've imagined. He knows that it's only a matter of time before he falls completely in love with her. Hell, he's already loved her for over two decades, but they're two different feelings, and he'll do whatever he can to make sure he gets everything right for her. For them.
Their first kiss was everything she thought it would be and then some. For the first time, in a very long time, everything felt right. They had been building up to this for the past year, ever since they rekindled their friendship and that they had finally given in to each other was a huge weight lifted off of their shoulders. Especially hers. Yes, they'd have to file paperwork, inform immediate supervisors, probably have to sit through a meeting with HR to confirm that neither were being sexually harassed by each other, but all of that could wait until tomorrow. For now, she'd enjoy being a rule breaker as she makes out with Andy on the terrace of the PAB.
Tangling his fingers into her hair, he grinned against her mouth as she let out a soft moan. "Now that is a sound I can get used to," Andy whispered as he pulled back. "You okay?"
"More than," she smiled as she gently scratched up and down his back. Even without his jacket, he was still warm. They weren't ready to declare anything yet, but Sharon needed Andy to know who he was to her. "You are so important to me. I hope you know that."
"I do," he sighed while pressing his forehead against hers. He knew what she was trying to say without actually saying it. They weren't ready for that, so this would have to do for now. He grabbed her by the hand to guide them to sit on the bench. Once they were sitting, he wrapped his arm around her, gently rubbing her arm to keep her warm. He smiled when she let out a little hum as she snuggled as close to him as possible. "You do realize that we were set up, don't you?"
"Oh, I figured it out the second your best friend started waxing poetic about taking chances after a divorce, how some things were inevitable, and how sometimes friendships can grow into something more. You should've seen the look on his face when I asked him if he was trying to ask me out. He muttered something about bro-code, which I swear he learned from Rusty. I haven't seen him stutter that much since I was on patrol!" She tried holding back the snort laugh, but the look on Andy's face when she asked Provenza if he was asking her out was priceless. "He tried telling me that he and Andrea were working on a case. Said they, "had some…things to go over for something they're working on. A case that's dragged on long enough," she said mocking Provenza's tone.
"You gotta hand it to him, he really does know how to spin things. But I don't know what scares me more. The fact that your best friend and my best friend joined forces, or that I really thought he was going to ask her out. I mean, can you imagine going on a double date with the two of them?"
"I cannot even put into words just how disturbing that is," she said as she swatted his chest. "Speaking of dates, you, sir, still have something you need to ask me."
"Do I?" He paused before he started to count off on his fingers. "I've already held your hand, I've given you my jacket, and you already felt me up when you had your hands in my pants as you were looking for my phone. Don't think I didn't feel the squeeze either. Oh, and I've already had my tongue down your…"
"ANDY!" She shrieked as she pushed away from him. She stood up to walk away, but he was somehow able to maneuver her back down into his lap. She should be mad, but she couldn't help but giggle at how unbelievably Andy he was being. "You can be such a dork sometimes!"
"What? All that stuff is supposed to happen at the end of the first date. What's the point in asking you out on a date if we've already done all the post first date stuff?"
"Well, if you're fine with staying stuck at first base, then by all means," but she was interrupted when he kissed her again. Somehow she forgot what she was saying when he went ahead and stuck his tongue back down her…Anyway, she quickly pulled back when she realized he was just distracting her. "Words. I was saying words. Now I, I can't seem to remember them."
"You can't make a baseball reference while sitting in my lap! Do you have any idea how incredibly hot that is? Of course I'm going to kiss you. Now, as I was saying," he smiled as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Sharon, would you please do me the honor of going out on a real date with me?"
Now it was her turn to smile. "Yes, Andy. I'd love to go out on a real date with you. But, can we stay here just a little bit longer? I know the dynamic duo already came back and unlocked the door, but I'm not ready to let them know that we figured them out."
"You saw them, too? I knew the old man was slow, but I figured he'd try to hide it better than that. And what's up with your best friend? I thought she ran marathons?"
"She hurt her knee a while back. She's been a little slow in recovering. Maybe they would make a cute couple after all. Think of all the double date adventures we can go on!"
The squeal she let out when he practically tossed her off of his lap to stand echoed around him. "No, Sharon! Just no! Why would you go back to the scary place?" He shuddered as he tried to erase all of that from his mind. "My pure and innocent eyes can never unsee that now. I feel so betrayed!"
"Innocent? Definitely not a word I'd use to describe you, Andrew Flynn. You're about as pure as the yellow snow," she laughed.
"You wound me, woman. And here I was thinking of all the dates I was going to take you on. I was even thinking of officially asking you to be my girlfriend. I may have to rethink things now because," but he was interrupted when she decided to stand and shut him up with a searing kiss of her own.
When Sharon pulled back, the complete dumfounded look on Andy's face told her that she had accomplished exactly what she set out for. "You were saying?"
"I can't even remember my own name right now, much less what I was saying. But, uh, if you never stopped doing that, that would be great. Like, really great." He said while trying to catch his breath. The mischievous grin she wore as he spoke told him that he was in for a world of trouble, but she worth it. He couldn't help but wrap his arms around her again. "As much as I'd love to continue hiding up here with you, I can see that you're getting even colder. But I'm not quite ready to let you go for the night though. How about we get out of here? We could head over to Francesca's to get some dinner, and we can sit and talk some more about all of this and about us."
There he was, being so completely Andy again. There was just something that made him so cute when he was nervous. She wondered just how nervous she could actually make him. "That sounds wonderful. But how about you call in the order and bring it over to my place? Rusty's not home and he's already let me know that he'll be gone the entire night. Something about staying over at Buzz's I guess."
"That can work. That way we won't have to worry about anyone kicking us out of the restaurant if the conversation goes on too long. I'll call it in when we get downstairs. The usual for you? I can order something for Rusty too so that way he has something when he does get home."
Judging by the fact that he skipped right over the Rusty not being home part, he wasn't picking up on what she was saying. He really was adorably clueless sometimes. "Yeah, I mean yes, the usual is fine for me. But nothing for Rusty. He's going to be gone all night. The whole night. Won't be home until tomorrow. So it'll just be us. The whole night. Alone."
"Hey, I can stop by Marchetti's since it's right there! I'll get you a cannoli, or do you want a mini cheesecake? Never mind, I'll get both. What kind of…ouch!" He'd never realized just how much getting his suspenders snapped would hurt. "Jesus, Sharon! What was that for?!"
"Because you're being just so…you," she laughed as she smoothed her hands over his suspenders, grabbing a hold of them to bring him a little closer. When she looked up at him, he was looking all kinds of confused, so she gave him a light peck on the lips to get his attention. "Andy, it's just us. The entire night." she whispered. The surprised look in his eyes told her that he finally got what she was saying.
"Are you sure? I want to do this right, so if it's too soon," but she cut him off with another kiss.
"Andy, I'm sure. It's time to take your girlfriend home."
Grabbing her hand to lead them back inside, he smiled. Girlfriend. Yeah, he could get used to that. "While I have no problem doing that, first I need to feed her. She gets mean when she's hungry. Hangry, if you will. Then she pinches and glares, and…" he laughed when he saw the look on her face. "That! That face right there. You do a very good impression of her, you just need more eyebrow…ouch! See! She pinches!"
As they stepped onto the elevator, she stood directly in front of him with her back to him pretending to be angry. Sharon realized that the year they've spent avoiding each other was the biggest round of foreplay ever, and the continued playful bickering was adding more fuel to the fire. Even she didn't think they'd make it through dinner. "Oh, I'll pinch you, alright! Now I'm the one that's beginning to rethink all of this. The thought of spending the night alone is getting more appealing with each passing…" Somehow he'd wrapped one arm around her waist to draw her back to him and moved her hair away from her neck with his other hand. Almost instantly, he had found the one spot on her neck that was the most sensitive. It had to be quick, since they had a short elevator ride back to the ninth floor, but he got his point across rather quickly. Yeah, they definitely weren't eating dinner. "…second. I don't…know…what that…What?"
God, she really was gorgeous when she was flustered. "Oh, I didn't say anything. After you, Captain," he said while motioning for her to exit the elevator.
"Thank you, lieutenant," she said as she smoothed over her clothes. She absolutely could not walk back into the murder room looking as if she'd just been making out on the roof. Luckily, the switching of personas was seamless for both of them.
They were silent as they walked back towards the murder room, hoping that no one was there to pick up on what had quickly changed between them. Seeing the murder room dimly lit, with not a person in sight, relieved them both. Neither Sharon nor Andy were in the mood to answer anyone's questions or stop for conversations. They just wanted to grab their belongings and get out of there as fast as possible. When Sharon walked towards her office, Andy went straight to his desk to gather up his things and to call in their dinner. Once the order was placed, he leaned on her office door to wait for her.
"Hey, the order is placed. You can head straight home and I'll go pick it up. I shouldn't be too far behind you." Taking another step inside, he lowered his voice so that no one but Sharon heard him, "So don't make it obvious as you look, but frick and frack are hiding behind the wall of the super cubicle. They really think we can't see them."
"Are they really?" Sharon asked while trying to get a glimpse of whom Andy was talking about. When she saw Andrea quickly retreat, she had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing. "They are ridiculous. But, how about we give them what they wanted, hmm?" She said while stepping around her desk. The mischievous grin she wore had Andy smirking because, this time, he knew exactly what she meant. As they both glanced around to make sure no one else was around, they leaned in towards each other for a kiss that lasted just long enough to get their point across. "Don't get too used to that, lieutenant. We still have a great many things to discuss."
"I wouldn't dream of it, Captain. I do look forward to, discussing, all of the great many things on your mind. But, um, before dinner?"
Sharon smiled at him again. "Oh, I think after. Way, way after." She really had no intention on even opening the shopping bags when he walked through her door.
As Provenza and Andrea watched Andy and Sharon head out of the murder room, they glanced over at each other with an overwhelming sense of accomplishment. "Well," Provenza piped up. "I'd say that went well, wouldn't you, Hobbs?"
"Indeed, Lieutenant. That is one particular case that I am very happy to see closed. This is one instance where a life sentence is the perfect outcome."
"I've never been a fan of the deal making process, but this is one that I can definitely live with. Now, speaking of dinner, I'm a little hungry myself. Care to join me for a post-case celebration between two friends?" Provenza asked while holding his arm out for her. No, he was absolutely not thinking of Andrea Hobbs in that way, but he was in a particularly good mood, so he figured what the hell. A dinner couldn't hurt.
Andrea gave him a puzzling look, but could tell he was being truly genuine. "You know what? That sounds like a great idea," she smiled as she looped her arm within his as they walked out of the murder room. "I promise I won't tell anyone your secret."
"And what secret would that be, my fair Deputy District Attorney?" He asked while pressing the elevator call button.
"That underneath that gruff and grumpy exterior, you are nothing but a giant teddy bear. A giant romantic teddy bear."
The grumble Provenza let out had Andrea laughing, but she wasn't that far off. He'd never tell her that of course. "I swear on everything good and holy, Hobbs. If you tell anyone, I will end you."
"Ha! Like anyone would actually believe me! I do have a bet for you though." She paused as they entered the elevator. "I'll bet you three rounds of shots at Mulcahey's that they don't even make it through dinner."
"Oh, I'll take that bet. But something tells me that they're not going to make it to dinner at all. I have it on good authority that Rusty's out for the entire night." Hobbs didn't need to know that he bribed the kid into staying over at Buzz's place.
"You're on. But what do I get if I win?"
"I'll write your Maid of Honor speech for you. We can call it, 'Matchmaker, Matchmaker: A Tale of the Biggest Idiots That Ever Idioted.'"
END