Present Day

Jay didn't know how this was going to go. He had ideas and every one of them seemed plausible, even the one where ninja's broke into the precinct, though he was pretty sure that wasn't likely. But all the scenarios he dreamed up that ended with Tess lashing out or trying to leave entirely…

Those seemed legit.

And it made him feel like the biggest ass in the world but when they finally parked in the back lot he gave his team a heads up on how he thought she would respond and together they worked out a plan. He still had no idea if it was the right one but it was something and he used that to steady him, as helpful as the reassuring looks his team kept giving him as they made their way inside. The first thing they heard as they approached was Tess's voice and it immediately sent his heart racing; he hated hurting her and there was no doubt this was going to but he kept reminding himself that it would help too.

Just… after the sting of the initial hit faded.

However long that took.

The next voice he heard was Trudy's and he gave a grateful look to Kim who'd suggested they include her. "I was told to be here."

"By who?"

"By me."

Tess had already spun around by the time he rounded the corner and he could see that behind her immediate confusion there was the innate trust she'd always had in him. And that didn't fade but her eyes did narrow sharply when Kevin, Kim and Adam stepped up beside him. More when she realized Hailey and Vanessa had gone to stand by Voight and Trudy.

Making it so that she wouldn't be able to leave.

Her face went cool fast when she realized that, her brows raising sharply. "I feel the urge to remind or inform everyone that I do not take well to being on this side of an ambush."

"We don't want this to be a fight." Jay said calmly but her gaze just moved to Adam who despite his promises was clearly ready for a confrontation, though to his credit he took a softer tone than he had with him.

"We wanna talk to you."

"Look, I know what happened rattled everyone-"

"You rattled us. You're our friend and you- you let yourself be branded. For us." Kim cut in, the pain in her voice making Tess's face tighten.

"And don't say something about how it's not the first time because we're all very clear on that but it still doesn't make this okay."

Jay didn't know if the others caught Tess's tiny gulp after Adam's comment but he did, his eyes glued to her as she slowly straightened and nodded. "Alright. What do you want me to say?"

"That you'll let us protect you the same way you protect us." Vanessa replied adamantly and while they might not know the depth this time he was sure they all caught Tess's answering pulse of fear.

His girl was too used to the shadows.

Too used to being left on her own.

"Thank you. I honestly didn't mean to upset anyone, it all happened so fast but Trudy already made it clear that I could have reached out to her. That's just… not always in my nature." She said after a moment, her soft smile tightening ever so slightly when no one seemed swayed by it. "But I know to accept help when it's offered, so the next time something happens I promise to find a way to share the load."

He believed her, but as much as it hurt he couldn't trust her to make a fair decision on how that burden was shared.

"Good. But that's not enough."

"What exactly are you expecting?" Tess asked calmly, so damn good at staying composed when he'd bet anything that she was screaming inside.

"We want you to work with us." Adam replied, more like demanded and he had to hold back a wince when her brows arched.

"I thought I was?"

"Every day."

"I don't want that." Tess said coolly but he could see her tension growing when she had to turn to look at Hailey, her back and shoulders now rigid.

"Why?"

"Because I just spent fifteen years working practically nonstop. And as much I enjoy all of you-"

"Well that's nice." Adam scoffed but before Jay could give him a look to back off Tess whirled around with one that had his mouth snapping shut.

"I don't say this to diminish the work you do because I know that it's important and I have respect for you and most of the people who do it but I have spent my entire adult life tracking down arms dealers and bioterrorists and assassins and I left because I got bored of it." She said slowly, and a little condescendingly which he was pretty sure was intentional when her chin tilted up when Adam straightened. "So no, working for the Chicago police department does not excite me."

"Then work with us half-time. Work with Cam the other half." He suggested, trying to get her to see that this wasn't an ultimatum but she shook her head.

"I don't want to work with Cam, and I don't want to work with CPD."

"Why not? If what we do isn't exciting enough for you, then help us do more." Adam prodded but she just shook her head again.

"I don't want t-"

"Why not?"

"Because I will burn your blue fucking wall to the ground!" Tess suddenly shouted and even though she was fast to get herself back under control it was clear her intensity, and her statement had rattled everyone. "I do not want to work with another racist, sexist institution that has no desire to change and will fight me at every turn. I did my time."

I did my duty.

The words ran on repeat through Jay's mind, tearing something deep inside him. But they weren't asking her to go back to something that had hurt her, they wanted her to try something they truly believed would make her happy. It was different.

Right?

Kevin spoke next, telling her that they weren't trying to make her uncomfortable and for the first time he tore his eyes from her and found them automatically locking with Voight's, silently begging his Sergeant to tell him he was making the right call. His subtle nod had him relaxing but only marginally because Tess still didn't look swayed. She looked as close as he'd seen her in the last six months to visibly terrified.

"You need to tell them." Voight said quietly when Kevin was done and everyone immediately straightened with confusion and concern, the latter of which he swore had her trembling.

"Tell us what?" He asked when Tess stayed quiet but while she turned back to him her eyes quickly started flicking to the spaces between each of them.

And horrifyingly to the window.

"You're not getting past us."

Oh shit.

Her head cocking at Adam couldn't be described as anything but predatory but the younger man didn't listen to literally any of them when they each gave him quiet warnings and instead stepped towards her, a movement she was quick to match. "You think you'd win that fight?"

"I think we're not letting you go without one." He said firmly and like a switch flipping her head shook furiously, the hurt in her voice so real, so deep it broke his heart.

"Why?"

"Because you're our friend." Kim insisted with her own, much smaller step closer and when Tess immediately backed up that was the first time he saw everyone realize just how much they were affecting her.

Just how much she'd been holding in.

Holding back.

"That wouldn't change." Tess pushed, her voice tinged with desperation that turned into an awful mix of confusion, appreciation and hopelessness when Hailey spoke up again.

"Because like it or not you're one of us." His old partner said softly, her own remorse and resolve written so clearly, and so intentionally written across her face. "And we protect our own. And if you really want to keep us safe you'll accept that because we're not letting this go."

And that was when Tess broke.

He didn't know her internal monologue, could guess at it but he didn't know, but when her shoulders deflated they all knew she was done fighting them.

And Jay was left with the horrible feeling that he'd broken something a lot worse.

"What did Ang say?" He asked gently, sharing looks with his teammates before she sluggishly turned back to him that had them taking subtle steps back.

"He said to remember that he's not the only one who doesn't like me." She answered with a small shrug, her face suddenly so impassive that it scared him.

"I think we knew that."

Adam's joke fell flat but he appreciated the sentiment, and he definitely appreciated Vanessa's protective stance. "Did someone threaten you?"

"Did they threaten us?" Trudy asked when Tess just shook her head.

"No one said anything."

"Tess-"

Her shoulders slumped even lower as she sat on his desk, gazing blankly out one of the windows. "Not directly. It's never direct. It's a military dentist who disappeared without a trace. A contact who gave a C.I information who also disappeared. Whispers and shadows that never lead to anything concrete. A ghost."

Her laugh as she said that last word broke his control and as soon as he got his feet to move he was at her side; it might be muted right now but he could feel her anger and it filled him with shame to know some of it was directed towards him. So did the fact that he'd had suspicions about someone targeting her but had been too afraid to bring them up. No wonder she was carrying so much.

No one else was taking anything.

"You're talking about the hack. The one that leaked your information?" Kim asked in shock, a reaction everyone shared. "You think someone has been targeting you? For five years?"

Tess just nodded, so demoralized he had to blink back tears and he didn't know what hurt more, that or the tiny spark of hope that filled her eyes when she looked back to Voight. "Someone went after Olive and Daniel."

What?

His Sergeant went through a rapid range of emotions, what rippled through the rest of them just a fraction of his pain because that was his grandson.

And because every one of them should have expected that.

But they hadn't.

"Years ago, but there's no saying someone else won't try again." She said seriously, her solemn stare slowly making its way around the room. "Or that they won't go after Mak. Or Vanessa or Jordan or Mouch. As long as you are in my orbit anyone that any of you care about will be a target."

And she wasn't worth that.

She didn't say it but it was clear that was what Tess felt, what she believed and he watched all of them take that in, watched them wonder if they could handle that, his heart filling with love and pride when they just looked to Voight.

The older man smiled before he nodded, his stare soft as he turned back to Tess. "Then we're in danger no matter what. We know what we want. It's up to you now."