Chapter 4

You Cannot Kill Clive!

Year 870

Jote admit that were times in her life when she felt self-conscious around Joshua. From the very beginning, she dutifully remained at his side as instructed by the Elders. Yet she could not help but think perhaps Joshua was too kind to dismiss her or admit his true feelings on the matter. There was a time when a few Undying Elders admonished her and as a result she seldom began new lines of conversations with Joshua. "Every word must be measured in his Grace's presence, Jote. Each word must hold meaning."

Joshua would often be the first to break long stretches of silence and would encourage her to speak her mind. But old habits die hard and Jote still needed practice.

"I wonder…Jote…if it's really him," Joshua pondered in a low voice.

"…Who, your Grace?" inquired Jote. Although she knew exactly to whom he referred.

"The rumors about the Bearer possessing the Blessing of the Phoenix. My dear brother. I don't know who else it could possibly be. That blessing only comes from the Phoenix's Dominant. When I was a child, I only bestowed it upon him as my First Shield and no one else," Joshua contemplated, gazing straight ahead deep in thought. His eyes slightly narrowed.

A stronger breeze blew by them and carried the scent of the cooling sand. A few moons ago, there were rumors not only in Tabor but Northreach, Boklad, and Dalimil Inn of this Bearer through coded letters from outside Undying affiliates. When word reached Joshua, he did not have to ask Cyril and the Undying twice to investigate. They sent word in person, through letters, and through stolas to their comrades all over Valisthea to search for the Bearer, Clive Rosfield. This took immense time and effort but Joshua urged the Undying to see each rumor trail to its end.

Jote held her own reserved views on the matter of which she was certain Joshua would not be happy to hear. She sensed a darkness behind all of this searching. An ominous sensation that was difficult to weave into words. Maybe it had to do with her close proximity to Joshua both as his companion and protector but at times she felt that her brothers and sisters would change topics of conversation the moment they sensed her about to enter a room.

She could swear she heard the name "Clive" or "Marquess" before they silenced themselves or spoke of a different topic. They did not mention anything related to Clive Rosfield in front of Joshua. Clearly, they did not wish for either of them to know whatever it was they knew. Which truly bothered her because she at least deserved full disclosure as his protector.

"My lord…I am not certain myself. Could it be that he does not wish to be found?" Jote immediately winced at her implications. Maybe she should have held her tongue.

Joshua looked at her with a reflective expression. He opened his mouth to say something but then stopped as her question brought on another line of thinking.

Jote cast her eyes down and away in shame, biting her lip. Her chestnut eyes glistened over. "Your Grace, I…please accept my regrets. I am sure there is nothing more my Lord Marquess would desire than to be reunited with his beloved long-lost brother," she spoke nervously.

"It's all right, Jote. There is no need to apologize. Your insights are truly valued and I request that you always be candid with me. How can my mind expand if I'm only surrounded by those who echo my views?"

He angled himself towards her and looked at her with those solemn eyes again. The couple of torches that were set up around them reflected his visage in the softest hues. Her heartbeat hastened and the blush on her cheeks, initially there due to shame, now blossomed into one of shyness.

"I thank you for your forgiveness, your Grace," Jote replied with gratitude. Joshua's expression seemed to slightly falter. She had no idea why. Sometimes she sensed that Joshua wanted her to say more - to coax her veiled thoughts from her mind. She was conditioned to believe her duty constrained her from openly speaking her mind, especially to him. However, she harbored a clandestine desire to share so much more with him.

Joshua shifted his face slowly away from her as he regarded the ravine walls surrounding them. But he was still turned towards her. She observed that he was close and their knees almost touched.

"But I have never considered that point…" he whispered to himself. After a few moments, he gave his copper blond waves a gentle shake, dispelling his thoughts. He stood up from the boulder.

"Come. Let us make our way back for supper," Joshua held out his hand to help Jote up. She glanced up hesitantly and then took his hand. She could feel the warmth of his hand covering her small gloved one as he pulled her up. She couldn't help but notice that his hands were elegant even though he assisted the Undying with laborious tasks.

Without much thought, Joshua waved his hand to extinguish the fire from the neighboring torches. The pair were plunged into darkness and their eyes had to adjust to the moon and stars. Shortly after, he conjured a floating fireball which moved in front of them as a friendly guide. They watched their footing as they both walked through the Krozjit Echoes and eventually reached the Rymasov Flats and eventually Tabor - stopping a couple times to vanquish a few beasts together.

From the moment she and Joshua entered the Undying headquarters, Jote sensed tension and unease in the air. This was a highly odd feeling in the residence. If anything, the typical silences felt peaceful and almost sacred. Supper was on the table before them, and all had gathered to begin their evening repast together. But conversations were clipped. Some of the Elders seemed to pretend that everything was normal in their muted conversations. Even Joshua was behaving like his characteristic self as he helped himself to the meal but Jote could not tell if that was a façade. She was too busy astutely observing everyone else with suspicion as she leisurely partook in her meal.

Sulien and his assassins taught Jote everything when it came to the art of reading nonverbal communication that it had become instinctual. She perceived the nuances of a person's expression, their tonal shift, and their slightest of movements. By accurately observing and calculating all of these, she could swiftly make judgements that would save Joshua's life as well as her own. Hence, she was always hypersensitive to her surroundings. Daggers were always at the ready though not in this case as she was in the presence of her comrades. Master Cyril appeared the most serene compared to everyone at the table. That automatically raised her suspicions. While Joshua was the Master, Cyril was the senior leader. He was always the first to know of any affairs involving the Undying even before Joshua.

Jote could not relax throughout suppertime – even as she ate, the food seemed to turn to ash in her mouth. There was an impending sense of doom and anxiety within the corners of her mind. She was almost relieved when Cyril stood up after the dishware had been put away to make an announcement. Everyone went silent. Cyril made direct eye contact with Joshua from the other side of the table.

"Your Grace. I beg your pardon for this untimely intrusion. May I humbly request permission to impart a matter of utmost importance? It is imperative that we conduct an urgent council session tonight as it concerns a mission bestowed upon us by your esteemed self," Cyril stated in his mystical voice.

Jote immediately flicked her head to Joshua as others did the same. The tension had finally been broken. Joshua subtly straightened himself. His eyes had slightly widened before setting back into his carefully neutral expression. Jote had the feeling Joshua knew exactly what or who Cyril was referencing. She had a sinking feeling that it had everything to do with the person that Jote and Joshua had just spoken about back in the Krozjit Echoes and many times before.

"Of course. I am most eager to learn of the findings. Let us relocate to the gathering chamber." Joshua rose from his seat. Jote gathered herself to follow after him as was the custom. As if it were a ritual, she knew that Cyril would fall in step behind her along with the Elders.

The council meetings usually consisted of Joshua, Jote, and the Elders. Since Jote was Joshua's protector and attendant, she would follow him to all meetings even if she was not permitted to actively participate. The rest of the Undying acolytes and affiliates were not included but informed of the council's final decisions afterwards.

It was always custom that Joshua be the first to enter the gathering room and the first to leave when the meeting was adjourned. It was forbidden to hold council meetings without the Phoenix's presence.

Joshua held out his hand as he cast flames that sparked and spread in all directions to light the sconces fixed to the walls. He stood behind his chair at the head of the long table and Jote stood by her seat on the wall perpendicular to Joshua. She would be able to see his expression from the side.

Cyril stood by the door as the Elder men and women filed into the room in a ceremonious way and stood behind their assigned wooden chairs. Cyril sealed the door with a final click. Joshua took his seat and the rest of the Undying followed suit including Cyril and Jote. Cyril had taken his seat at the other end of the table. The grand four-sided table was surrounded by Elder chair members representing the various orders of the Undying including archivists, researchers, watchers, tacticians, and the assassins. A deafening silence filled the room as everyone watched Cyril. He always commenced the meetings.

"Honored Brothers and Sisters of the Undying, dedicated servants to the Keeper of the Flame of the Phoenix. This evening, we convene to address a most pressing matter that directly concerns his Grace."

Cyril's piercing gray eyes drifted to Joshua. "Your Grace, allow me to call upon Brother Agni into our meeting. Brother Sulien and I engaged in a prior discussion and reached the consensus that a meeting under your auspices is necessary upon your return. I am of the opinion that your Grace and the Elders should be informed of the current state of affairs directly from Brother Agni."

Jote's eyes widened upon hearing Agni's name. She could not recall the last time Agni had appeared in Tabor. He was certainly not present at supper an hour prior. While Sulien was his commander, Agni was the assassins' spy. She forced her eyes to look downwards at the stone floor and trace the edge of the rug with its arabesque design. She was supposed to act like a moth on the wall and she knew her face would reveal too much. But she could not help but steal a glance at Joshua.

She had to give Joshua much credit. She sensed his anxiety in the way he held his posture but the expression painted on his face was carefully measured and impartial.

"Yes…let him enter." Joshua's voice adopted a quieter tone than normal.

As if on cue, Agni opened the door from the other side and bowed to Joshua with his hand on his heart. "Your Grace."

Agni shut the heavy oak door behind him. He stood by the door in a firm and ready stance.

"Share your knowledge with us," Joshua requested.

"I seek your forgiveness for my brevity my liege. I shall present my findings without additional preamble. I can confirm the rumor is indeed true. There is a Bearer in the Imperial army wielding the Phoenix's Blessing. I witnessed his divine-like presence on the battlefield with my own eyes. He bears a striking resemblance to Lord Marquess, your brother Clive Rosfield. I made haste here to inform Brother Cyril of what I had seen rather than risk having my words be distorted through other means."

There was a simultaneous sudden intake of breath. Jote realized that it had audibly come from her and fortunately the rest of the Elders as well. Her head snapped towards Joshua.

Joshua's neutral expression gradually faded as his framed blue eyes became filled with…what was Jote seeing…emotion? Relief? It happened right after Agni said, "your brother, Clive Rosfield."

There were a few moments of silence as Joshua let this news sink in. Joshua was trying his best not to be overcome as he cast his eyes down towards the table. It seemed as if a burden was taken off his shoulders. It ached her to see him vulnerable yet fighting to keep himself in check as their leader. She wanted to take him away from the room so he could have a few moments of privacy to process this news. So many had thought Clive Rosfield dead for the past ten years. Joshua had held onto a string of hope but nothing was confirmed until this very moment.

Cyril broke the muffled silence with a low clearing of his throat. "Your Grace, we find ourselves confronted with another pivotal matter in light of this information," Cyril stated slowly and carefully as he beheld Joshua's stare. Cyril paused as he prepared himself to deliver the next statements. He inhaled and gave a grim sigh.

Was he nervous? Jote wondered

"Many of the Elders have meticulously amassed their findings over the years including Brothers Sulien, Agni, and myself. We have reason to believe that Lord Marquess, is indeed, the second Eikon of Fire who assailed your Grace on the Night of Flames. That is why Sulien's men are currently undertaking preparations as we speak to —"

"NO!"

The wounded cry resonated in the room in tandem with the scrape and crash of a chair.

Everyone in the room including Jote jerked instinctively as though an electric bolt from Ramuh had cast itself throughout the room. The most shocking part was where that cry came from – none other than Joshua himself. He was standing up and leaning over the table with his hands braced on the edge, breathing hard. His sapphire eyes were aflame and were searing straight into Cyril's at the opposite end of the table. Cyril had remained in the same seated position as before with a slightly shocked expression.

"No…no, you cannot kill Clive. I will not sanction such an act and I forbid it!" Joshua commanded in an impassioned voice rising to a crescendo.

Jote and the Elders were stunned to hear his voice at this volume. The only time Jote or anyone had heard his yells was in battle training. It was not a shrieking call of a spoiled prince used to getting what he wants but a cathartic exclamation of a courageous soul determined to stop a catastrophic injustice from occurring.

There was a protective fire in Joshua's eyes that Jote had never beheld. It stopped her heart and her breathing for a few moments, an awed expression on her face. Though none had ever witnessed him fully prime into the Phoenix, they all could see the Eikon right behind his eyes. He truly was the Prince of Flames.

"My lord," offered one of the older Undying Elders in an attempt to placate Joshua.

"Forgive me for my impudence…but your Grace teetered perilously on the precipice of death on that fateful night, and it can only be described as a miracle that you emerged from such a dire state. I daresay it must have been because you hold the Phoenix's regenerative essence within you. Considering the severe injuries inflicted by the second Eikon of Fire, it is our firm belief that any other Eikon would have succumbed to their wounds."

"I concur my lord," Elder Merle chimed. "As you are already aware, I was present on that night to witness the horrors that had befallen your Grace as a child. If your brother truly is the second Eikon of Fire…" Her voice to faltered at the end. It became difficult for her to finish the sentence. Her hand came to cover her lips.

"Then for the safety of his Radiance and for the preservation of the Phoenix, we must eliminate Lord Rosfield," Sulien finished. He stated that fact in a depressed tone. Sulien folded his hands together on the table and cast his eyes down. He did not wish to make eye contact with Joshua. Neither Sulien nor anyone in that room truly wished to upset Joshua but his life was their priority.

"But you all serve Rosaria. Thereby you serve the Rosarian bloodline which includes Clive," countered Joshua as he stared at each of the Elders. He was still standing with his arms braced upon the table.

"Yes, your Grace. That is accurate. We have humbly served the House of Rosfield and the Grand Duchy of Rosaria from the shadows. However, our primary allegiance lies with the Phoenix and its Dominant. Our ultimate duty is first and foremost to the Firebird," Cyril emphasized. His tone was not one of impudence but one of guidance. Cyril seemed the most prepared of all of the Elders to handle this unexpected reaction from Joshua.

"Your Grace, there is yet another revelation from the Night of Flames of which you may not be aware," replied a different Elder. "When extraditing you from the ruins, we noticed that many Rosarian soldiers met their end in conflagration while others were mercilessly crushed by debris. But there was one unconscious person who lay not far from you. Lord Rosfield lay completely unscathed. Yet because we had to prioritize your safety and we feared the possibility that your brother could be that second Eikon of Fire, we had no choice but to forego the risk and leave him. We tell you this now because of the years of amassed evidence and extend our sincerest apologies for not revealing this information earlier."

Hearing this part was news to Joshua and his eyes widened in shock at this miserable revelation. He closed his eyes and seemed to wince in pain.

Jote had been watching each of the speakers but cautiously observing Joshua the most. He was silent now as his eyes bored into the table in front of him. He seemed to be at war in his mind while trying to process the words he had just heard. But he seemed to already be drawing conclusions. She knew he was going to be diplomatic about the situation. Try to find a way where all parties could mutually agree. In that moment, Jote realized she knew him better than anyone in that room. But that realization did little to comfort her as she dreaded his response.

Everyone sat completely immobile for a while. After what seemed like an eternity, Joshua finally straightened himself. He slowly approached his fallen wooden chair and placed it quietly back at the table in a dignified manner. He regained most of his initial composure as he seated himself. His signature stance was something that Jote recognized all too well – one arm crossed over his chest while holding up the other which held his chin while he was deep in thought.

Joshua inhaled before he began.

"Since I awoke from my insentient state, I always held this strong conviction that there was a dark power forcing the hands of the Eikons. It certainly did with me when I first primed into the Phoenix as a child. I did not realize that this second Eikon of Fire could possibly be my brother…yet somehow…I knew it was him after years of denial. After many years of sleepless nights compelling myself to remember every traumatic detail of that night to answer questions."

The Undying Elders stiffened upon hearing this. Joshua tended to share selected thoughts with the Undying but only ones related to his requests. Few were truly permitted inside of his heart. With the exception of this moment, it dawned on Jote that she was one of the very, very few who Joshua allowed inside of his mind let alone his heart.

'Tis only natural as his protector. It doesn't convey any other meaning. Jote mentally reprimanded herself. But there was another feeling dominating within Jote which was not like the feeling at supper.

Doubt.

She held it back from manifesting into something solid as she eagerly bored her eyes into Joshua and listened.

Joshua continued in an increasingly confident tone. "I have had many summers to reexamine and reconsider every possible angle of that encounter. I am confident in stating that without a doubt, my brother was not in control of the second Eikon of Fire on the Night of Flames. I have never been more certain of anything in my life. He was controlled by an unknown power far beyond our understanding at the present moment."

The room's aura erupted at the end of Joshua's statement even though the Undying Elders strained to keep their voices low. Bewilderment and shock were tangible in the room. The flames from the mounted torches on the stone wall seemed to pulse as if taking their cue from the Dominant of Fire himself.

The Elders promptly stated their concerns one after another in succession:

"But sire! Are we to trust that Lord Rosfield is able to keep control of this Eikon of Fire?"

"There have been no reports of this Eikon since that night. We cannot know what risk he poses the next time he primes, your Grace."

"Indeed – that night was the first and it shall certainly not be the last."

"Would caution not be the better alternative?"

"Aye, besides I fear that Lord Rosfield may also be a risk to others as well."

In a council meeting of a different sort, this would have been a frantic scene but the Undying had a knack for procedural formalities. It was a discussion where everyone took their turn and their voices were only slightly raised due to their concern. For the Undying, this meeting was highly unusual because there was a unanimous mentality behind their words for the first time – doubt.

No one ever doubted the Phoenix. That was an implied sacred law.

Yet here everyone was doing the exact opposite. They still tread carefully in their tone and respect towards Joshua nonetheless.

Jote's earlier feelings of dread sparked into full-fledged exasperation and sheer disbelief. If anyone glanced at her, they would witness her own burning eyes and furrowed brows betraying her. She was shocked at her own bubbling reaction seething underneath the surface.

Has his Grace gone mad?! Her hands clasped together tightly in her lap to the point where her nails dug in. Even if she was being tortured to death, she would NEVER state that thought aloud to anyone. This moment was the most incredibly tense encounter between Joshua and the Elders and for some reason, it was really getting under her skin.

All this time have I mistaken his kindness and compassion for weakness? He cannot possibly allow Lord Rosfield to live after what he did to his Grace! Recollections that she tried to suppress of that night as a six-year-old unwillingly forced themselves into her mind. It was as if a bolted iron door had flown open. The images were forever burned into her mind of a small body ripped to ribbons, of broken bones and flesh separated from them. Covered in thick red blood. How was that poor creature still breathing? She realized that this battered being was just a child like herself. She could not believe that life allowed such a terror to befall a boy like him. It was at that moment she understood how cruel life can be.

From that day forward, she made a promise to herself to be by his side. It was also the first time she had come to know hatred - for the monster that had torn the young boy and his life apart.

In the present moment, Jote's fury was a tempest that could not be placated now that the traumatic memory reared its head once more. A violent storm had taken hold of her heart and she was forced to hold back hot tears. Her fists now gripped the fabric of her Undying training garment. She clenched her jaw and took a steadied breath to prevent tears from falling.

She almost visibly shook her head as she knew once he set his mind to something, it was not likely to be swayed by anyone. She knew the moment she heard that tone in his voice – the unwavering faith in his brother's innocence. Despite this, Joshua was still listening to all concerns with patience as he thought through every question. His shoulders were slightly hunched on the table as he steepled his hands in thought.

Cyril and Sulien kept quiet the entire time as the Elders spoke their mutual concerns. Both of them maintained their steady postures and neutral expressions.

There was a moment of silence as the last question hung in the air. Jote slowly raised her eyes to Joshua. His expression seemed grave as he readied himself to address the room. The tempest within her was pacifying itself as she employed her meditative techniques to calm herself. She readied herself to listen to his next words.

"I understand all of your concerns in the matter. Know that I do not desire to cause apprehension to the household that has graciously saved and raised me as one of its own. I would not dare to place myself or others in a quandary. Nevertheless, I stand firm in my earlier sentiments. I will not allow any attempts on my brother's life. In exchange, I shall keep away from him until we collectively investigate and study the origins of this dark force. This mission will be the highest priority of the Undying until we discover all that is possible. Furthermore, I ask that we spare no effort in tracking Clive Rosfield's whereabouts and study his movements. We shall observe him from afar and assess if he is able to keep control of his Eikon. That is my verdict." Joshua concluded. He sounded like a true archduke of Rosaria. There was a note of finality with the last declaration.

The Undying Elders slowly turned to each other and murmured in agreement. Cyril leaned forward to give the concluding remarks. "The Elders of the Undying have received their decree from the Ruler of Life and Death. The assassination arrangements will cease. Our task henceforth shall be to utilize all members to garner all manuscripts, explore all venues, and find any information on this enigmatic force. We shall conduct a council meeting in a fortnight to discuss the exact means in which this mission will be executed."

With that, Joshua rose from his chair and the Elders and Jote followed suit. There was a brief pause and then everyone simultaneously placed their hands on their chest and bowed their heads towards Joshua.

"May the Firebird's flame burn ever in all of our hearts," everyone but Joshua murmured as their final benediction.

Joshua responded by bowing his head in response towards the collective.

Jote forced herself to wait patiently for the procedural departure from the gathering room. She strongly desired to flee from there and run towards her room. Guilt poured into her chest as she realized for the first time in her life she longed to be away from Joshua.

Joshua was the first to leave the meeting as was the custom. The rest stood and waited patiently for him to cross the threshold. Jote followed behind him as the others filed after her. Members of the Undying council trickled away into their own rooms as they walked down the narrow stone hallway. Jote followed Joshua to his quarters as usual. It was typical for her to check on him for any final requests before she departed to her own room for the evening.

The final soft footsteps of the last Elder disappeared and soon enough it was just her and Joshua in the darkened hall. The light from the sphere of fire he had conjured in front of them guided them to their respective rooms.

Jote could only see the back of him but she sensed a tension, a distraction, a heavily weighed silence radiating from Joshua. Her own gaze burned the back of his blonde waves. The lingering illicit feeling of doubt was ever-present along with many unspoken words behind her lips.

They reached the distressed wooden door that led to Joshua's room.

Before he turned to fully view Jote, she averted her eyes and asked in the most composed way she could manage, "Do you require anything from me, your Grace?"

"No…thank you, Jote."

"I bid you good evening, my lord."

Jote gave a terse nod of her head and with that, turned on her heel and strode to her own room on the right side of the hall.