XXX
Okay, so I'm posting this a little later than I intended… Tbh, I've spent all week knitting Jemima Puddle Duck and was too fixated on doing that to edit/post this chapter…
XXX
He stared at the wall, his heart pounding. He'd done his best to put an end to it, but the painful tightness in his chest had only gotten worse throughout the day. He wondered if something was wrong with his soul again, but he was pretty sure he wasn't having another qi deviation, at least.
He breathed out shakily.
Despite his heart beating like a horse running at top speeds, Shen Qingqiu was oddly motionless. Today, he did not pace or spin or wander around the room. Instead, he sat on the floor and stared and thought and felt his chest stutter.
Luo Binghe had already been by to 'visit' him, and absolutely nothing of note happened. It was the same as almost every other day in this place, or, those days when Shen Qingqiu wasn't dying or something, at least. He was fed. He was bathed. He was dressed. His hair was brushed. Luo Binghe spoke. Shen Qingqiu didn't really remember if he answered.
It was dull and bland and quite normal at this point, his days having become a repetitive and falsely peaceful routine that was generally only broken if he made it be so.
Luo Binghe hadn't even hit him, hadn't even been all that rough with him, in a while. He still used the parasites, still forced him to do what he wanted and kept him locked in this room (of course), but there hadn't been very much grabbing or breaking bones or digging claws into flesh or tearing off limbs and gouging out eyes, carving flesh from bone and dripping acid down his back, and it burned and hurt and a sword laid shattered before him-
He could have almost been described as gentle. Shen Qingqiu wanted to laugh at the thought of it.
Maybe he did.
It was almost like he was some concubine confined within her husband's estate rather than being a prisoner of the demon lord he'd once taught. Oh, how his prisons had changed. The differences between this imprisonment and the last made it almost seem ridiculous to compare them. How could he call this anything close to that?
They were both still prisons, though.
It wasn't as though he expected Luo Binghe to ever let him go. Of course not. No, someone who wouldn't even let go of the dead wasn't ever going to let him walk free.
But he also hadn't expected his prison to become so soft.
Idly, Shen Qingqiu raised a hand and bit at one of his knuckles. Things were seeming a little fuzzy, and he thought that, maybe, it would help with that.
Luo Binghe wasn't hurting him.
So he was left to wait for when he would.
XXX
"Shizun, would you be more willing to eat if I made something you like?" Luo Binghe asked. "I can make something different if it would actually get you to eat on your own."
His sharp gaze was enough of an answer on its own, but he still spoke.
"I'm not going to willingly eat anything touched by your hands."
"… You didn't eat the food my servants made, either."
"Why would I?! A different demon may be better than you but they're still a demon!"
"What about if a human made it?"
"No!"
XXX
He pulled his hair, tugging at it until his scalp began to sting. He'd started screaming, but there wasn't any words to it. He just wanted to scream, and it's not like there was anyone else there to witness it.
He hated this. He hated him. He wanted to kill him. He wanted to be done with this.
He just wanted this stupid game to end.
XXX
"I brought you a book."
"That's not going to work a second time."
"Again, I didn't poison you," Luo Binghe sighed. "And this isn't a deal. I'm just giving it to you."
"Like hell it isn't."
"It's not."
"You wouldn't give me anything without some kind of ulterior motive."
"Perhaps my ulterior motive is keeping you from becoming any more insane," Luo Binghe looked down at him, arms on his hips. "After all this, I'm not letting you go mad with boredom."
"Shall I go mad with something else, then?"
"Just take the book."
XXX
He laid in the bed, not having gotten up since Luo Binghe left. He was pretty sure the demon wasn't using his blood parasites, but his body felt sluggish, and convincing himself to get up felt impossible. Had the little beast drugged him this time, perhaps?
Well, it didn't really matter.
It wasn't like there was a reason to get out of bed, anyway.
XXX
After Luo Binghe forced him to eat, he made himself throw it back up on purpose, and he did it right in front of him so he could watch.
The demon's eyes flared, but he didn't snap or grab him. Instead, he just left, and after a servant had cleaned the mess, he returned with another tray of food.
He wished it felt more like a victory, but Luo Binghe made him eat the second meal, so he was sure he lost.
XXX
He spun around and around, looking up at the ceiling. His limbs were restless, and pacing wasn't enough, so today was a spinning day.
Nothing interesting ever happened on the ceiling. It was always the same, day after day. It didn't even have any cracks or holes to look at. It was just a uniform expanse, each corner the same as all the others.
It was always the same.
Always the same…
XXX
"I can't file your teeth like I do with your nails, Shizun," Luo Binghe said, his tone dark.
"It's barely even broken skin, so who cares. Even if it did, good."
Luo Binghe sighed.
XXX
He was surprised that Luo Binghe hadn't gotten bored of this yet, especially since he didn't seem all that amused during their visits anymore. Surely, he'd have more fun if he was tearing away chunks of his old master's flesh. But no, he was still pretending that his dose of torture was done with.
He still showed up most days (or, what was probably a day), often longer than he needed to.
He didn't understand how Luo Binghe hadn't gotten bored of this yet.
He certainly had.
XXX
"Shizun, calm down!"
He screamed.
"I won't mention him again, alright?"
He closed his eyes, but it wasn't enough to erase the image from his mind.
Sword shards laid out on the floor in front of him.
XXX
He kept his knees close to his chest, his hands pulling his head down toward them.
His face was wet, the liquid soaking into his robes as he curled in further.
He couldn't breathe.
He couldn't breathe.
XXX
He swung a fist as hard as he could, but it was stopped immediately.
He kicked with as much force as he could muster, but it was dodged.
He cursed like the street rat he had always been, but all he got was a request to calm down.
"Fuck you! I fucking hate you!"
"Yes, I heard you the first seventeen times," the demon lord sighed. "Now calm down, or I'll activate the parasites again."
"Go ahead!"
"Shizun, you're going to have another qi deviation if this keeps up."
"I don't care!"
His breathing was heavy.
"Would you just do something already?! I'm so tired of this stupid game of yours!"
"We've been over this. The rest of your punishment is imprisonment. That's it. I've already explained it."
"You're a liar! Is it really so much fun for you to watch me wait?!"
"Not really! Telling you this all the time is actually getting pretty tedious!"
"Then stop saying it!"
"I'll stop saying it when you stop asking me to hurt you!"
"Piss off!"
XXX
He ran a hand through his silky hair, not finding any tangles hidden within the strands.
He kept looking anyway.
XXX
Why couldn't he just get on with it?
XXX
Shen Qingqiu's mental state was getting worse, ironically becoming less stable the longer Luo Binghe continued to treat him a little more nicely. The man was thoroughly convinced that the demon lord was just playing the long game, savoring his breakdown as he waited to be dragged back to the Water Prison.
There had been times when Luo Binghe considered hitting him just so he'd stop panicking about being hit. But, that wasn't really going to help, and he knew it.
Leaning back, the demon let out a long sigh, gazing up toward his ceiling.
He had mentioned to the doctor his idea about giving Shen Qingqiu some kind of mild sedative so he would at least be calm, but Luo Binghe was going to have to leave the castle again, and he'd rather not start drugging him until he got back, just in case something went wrong.
Well, it wasn't like he'd be gone that long- three or four days at the most- and his Shizun had been like this for so long at this point.
What was a few more days?
XXX
Shen Qingqiu woke up to find a demon standing in his room, staring at him. He forced himself to hold back the flinch and decided he was just going to ignore it.
So, the little beast was busy today.
Good.
He didn't want him around, anyway.
"You have been instructed to eat."
Shen Qingqiu pretended he didn't hear it, merely rolling over in the bed so his back faced the thing. Let it tear his lungs out if it wished. It would be a perfect way to screw over the demon lord one last time, to be killed by some random servant.
The demon repeated itself, and Shen Qingqiu still ignored it.
Except it kept repeating itself. Over and over and over.
And so, the former peak lord flew out of bed, went over to the table, and grabbed the plate of food that had been set there. His ears were ringing, and his chest flared in the same anger he felt around the beast.
Then, he tossed the dish to the floor, aiming it toward the servant but falling short.
The plate shattered.
Shen Qingqiu stared at it, clenching his jaw and breathing hard through his nose.
Huh. Luo Binghe usually brought his meals on wooden dishes, something that didn't shatter when he had the opportunity to throw it.
The demonic servant rushed to start picking up the broken pieces.
It didn't seem to notice that a rather sizeable shard had flown under the table.
Shen Qingqiu shifted a little to hide it from view.
XXX
Luo Binghe slashed through another low-level cultivator who somehow thought he had the ability to take down his empire.
He didn't even have the ability to take down a single outpost.
XXX
He stared down at the shard in his hand. It- glinted silver- was a white porcelain painted with blue flowers.
And the edge was sharp.
His little babysitter had gone to dispose of the rest of the shards, and he was alone.
Did he have enough time? How soon would the servant be back? Would it stay and watch him, like the last one did when he refused to eat even when Luo Binghe was gone? Would it leave if he did eat something, so he could be alone? Or would it continue to watch him?
Did he risk doing it now, or was it more of a risk to wait for the demon to come back and possibly stay? Did he wait to see how long Luo Binghe would be gone? Was it only today, and he was busy elsewhere in the castle, or had he left for a longer period again? Should he wait until the demon lord's next visit and do it right after he left, to give the most time before his next visit? Or would Luo Binghe discover the shard and take it away?
His breath hitched.
He didn't want to risk it.
He just had to do as much damage as he could before someone found him.
XXX
Blood dripped off of his sword as Luo Binghe stood in the middle of the battle field. He glanced around to see if anyone else was hiding, trying to escape the fate they had earned by disobeying him.
He only found corpses.
XXX
Shen Jiu first brought the shard to his left arm, digging it in as deeply as he could without losing hold of it. Then, he jerked his hand to create a deep laceration in the flesh. He repeated it until he ran out of space, then switched over to the other arm.
That one was more difficult, since he had to use his already-damaged arm, but he still managed it.
His head was growing a little fuzzy.
But not quickly enough.
He raised the shard, bringing the sharp point to his neck.
And he drew it across in one sharp motion, spraying blood across the floor.
He almost laughed, but all that came out was a bloody gurgle as the world began to tilt.
XXX
