Chapter Thirty-Six: If you'll Have Me Back

[So he calls you Mom?] Shun asked curiously as he and Aki made their way to a nearby park.

[He does.] Aki responded with some hostility.

Shun shook his head in frustration, [I didn't mean- It's nice, how well you all get along. That's all I was trying to say.]

[Mmm.] Aki hummed emotionlessly. [And what's your opinion of him, then?]

The purpose of this conversation was to right wrongs, to fix misunderstandings, but suddenly, Aki found it vital to learn Shun's true feelings about Ash. Stubbornly, she thought that if he couldn't accept Ash, then maybe she didn't want him back.

[Well…] he began, [At first it shocked me...the first time we met...I wasn't sure what to think. I didn't expect that. Eiji never showed any signs he was into...guys. And I was worried, I won't lie. I didn't want to see Eiji get his heart broken.]

[You said at first. Do you still think that?]

[No, no. My opinion changed when he asked for my blessing to marry Eiji. I realized then my fears were unfounded. I could see Eiji was in love with him the first time we met...but then, at that moment, I could see Ash is in love with Eiji too.]

[Of course, he is!] Aki said harshly.

[I know, I know. I can see it now,] Shun said quickly, trying to convince Aki that they were on the same page. [But it's not just that.]

Aki raised an eyebrow.

[He loves you and Miyuki and your parents too. And you all love him. He fits into the family perfectly.] His voice was quieter now, like he was embarrassed of what he'd just said, sad even.

[And?] Aki asked, remembering her and Ash's conversation about Shun being too ashamed to visit his family as frequently as he used to.

[And I should have been there. For my son. He's about to be married and I hardly know his fiancé.] They arrived at their destination and began to head down one of the walking trails that snaked through the park.

[You could change that, ya know? Come back and become part of the family again.] Those were the words that burned inside her mind, but they were not the words she spoke. After all the hurt, after all the years of surviving without him, she wasn't about to let him off that easily.

[And what are you gonna do about it?] She asked instead.

Shun stopped in his tracks. He stared at Aki for a moment, before shaking his head sadly and continuing to walk. He never had been very good at voicing his emotions.

[What?] Aki demanded, [What were you thinking? What is it you're not saying?]

He obviously wanted to say something, his face was twisted in anguish, but he still remained quiet.

[Shun!] Aki prompted. [You have to talk to me, I can't read your mind!]

He veered to a nearby bench and sat, Aki hot on his heels. [What?] She asked again.

He shook his head and dropped it into his hands. [I never loved anyone else, you know?] He said, finally steering the conversation towards what Aki had wanted to talk about, although she hadn't yet told him as much. [I never even tried,] he added. [There were women at work. Interesting enough, beautiful, even,...but they weren't you.]

[Shun-]

[I never even considered trying to love someone else. There were men, men I worked with, who openly cheated on their wives. Bragged about it. I can't- I can't even imagine that.] He glanced at her from the corner of his eye. [Even after we were officially divorced...it would have still felt like cheating. I couldn't even fathom being with someone else. You should know that, at least. So to answer your question, I'd like to come home more, learn more about the people my children have become, but you've made it pretty clear you don't want me here."

[That's...not true,] she said slowly. [I don't want you here if you don't want to be here. Do you know how painful it was to lose your husband to a plush salary?]

His head shot up from his hands, [That's not why I left!] He said hastily. Tears burned his eyes but he blinked them away. [Oh, Aki, please, you must know I didn't take the job for the money!] He ran two nervous hands through his short, businessman haircut. [It's true, I had college tuitions in mind...I wanted to be able to provide for my family, pay the house off...but I didn't go to Tokyo for the money. If anything, I thought of it as a necessary sacrifice.]

Aki stood abruptly. [Ha!] She scoffed. [A sacrifice!?]

[Yes, a sacrifice!] Shun shouted back. His head went back to his hands. [You remember how my mother was,] he said, his voice returning to its usual tone.

[Yes, I remember! And I remember that you chose her wishes over your own family's!] Aki said harshly. [There are some things you just don't do, Shun! Necessary sacrifice!] She scoffed again, [You should have chosen necessary disobedience!]

For a long moment, Shun said nothing. He sat there, head in his hands, looking deeply remorseful. Aki felt guilty then. She wanted to talk to him to smooth things over, sort things out. This was not going as she planned. It was well within her rights to be upset, but it wasn't really helping anything.

She joined him on the bench again. [I'm sorry, I shouldn't have yelled.]

[No. No, you have every right to be angry.] He paused before speaking again. [Mom never liked you,] he said finally. [I married you anyway because I loved you. That was necessary disobedience. You weren't willing to move the family to Tokyo. She despised that decision simply because it was yours. And she hated that my gut reaction was to side with you, to reject the promotion. To stay here. In Izumo. She threatened to write me out of the will. When she and dad died, we wouldn't have inherited anything. I made the sacrifice and agreed to take the job...I really did have the family at heart.]

Aki stiffened. Eyes wide and watering, she asked softly, [Shun...Shun is that true? Why did you never tell me?] She angrily wiped tears from her eyes. [Shun! Why didn't you tell me?!] She demanded again with more heat.

He sat up straight and met her eyes. [There would have been war...You know how well-off my parents are. It would have been selfish of me to deny our family that help. That money could put Miyuki through college or buy her a house!]

[But she's dead now!]

[But that money is my father's, mom didn't work,] he reasoned. His parents were traditional. His father devoted his life to his career, while his mother raised the kids and took care of the house.

[So what?! You're just gonna stay in Tokyo till your dad dies and you can inherit his wealth?! It could be years until that happens! By then Miyuki will be through school and living her life! Are you gonna let all that happen before you come home?!]

Home.

[Would you even want me to come home?] He asked softly, not at all matching her fiery energy.

[OF COURSE, I DO!] She shouted, nearly at the top of her lungs. It was dark now, the park was technically closed, which was good because if there were people around, they certainly would have caused a scene. Aki burst into tears then, her face finding her hands.

Even if Shun hadn't been too shocked to move, he still wouldn't have known what to do.

[You'd...you'd want me to come home?] he asked, finally, in disbelief.

Aki nodded tearfully. [And so would the kids,] she choked out. [I didn't either, you know? I never loved again. I never wanted to. It never even crossed my mind as an option,] she added through tears.

[I- I thought-]

She looked up at him and interrupted. [I loved you, Shun.] The words sounded physically painful as she spoke them. [If I didn't, I would have let you leave and moved on. I made you choose Tokyo or us because it was too painful to pretend that what we were doing was normal.] She took a deep breath and let out a few more shuddering sobs. [I still love you,] she whispered.

[Ho- How?] He whispered back. [I've been awful.]

She shook her head, hair whipping from side to side. [I can't help it. Deep down I knew there must be a reason you chose Tokyo.]

[You...still...love me?] He asked, unbelieving.

Aki nodded. [Even more now that I've learned the full truth,] she said softly.

Shun let out a shuddering sigh. [I- I love you too, Aki. I never stopped. These last few years have been the hardest years of my life.]

And then, he lost it. He cried right along with her. After a few long minutes, he said [But that still doesn't solve anything. We could still really use my father's-] his voice trailed off because Aki was giving him a really strange look. One he wasn't familiar with. [Whaaaaat?] He asked, hesitantly.

[We don't have to worry about money,] she said calmly, her eyes still glinting strangely.

[I- I mean, I do have some put away, but I've been paying for the kids schooling and Eiji's travels and- and I don't know if I have enough to-]

[Hey,] she interrupted, [that's great and all, but that's not what I meant.]

He stared at her, puzzled.

[Ashu has more money than anyone could ever spend,] she finally explained. [Nearly 10 billion yen.]

His jaw dropped. He knew the boy had money, his expensive car and fully furnished week-old house made that abundantly clear, but he didn't expect that much. He also had the feeling Ash didn't want him to know that. Plus that was Ash's money, he couldn't assume he'd help them out.

[But- But that's his-] he stammered.

Aki shook her head, [You help the people you love. He'd help us in a heartbeat.]

[I could never! I could never ask him to do that,] Shun decided.

[Maybe we'd never have to...but if we ever needed the help, he'd be there.]

He sat in silence, considering her statement.

[10 billion yen, Shun. Not million, billion.]

[Still…] he exhaled shakily, [I'm not even sure the boy likes me. Why would he care if I came back?]

[Don't forget that he's the reason you're here right now,] she said seriously. [I think it's fair to say he likes you.] There was a pause and then she continued. [But do not mention the money. He's had a rough life. It's not your business where that money came from, unless he chooses to tell you.]

Shun looked puzzled. [He said he got lucky with some stocks in America…]

Aki chuckled. [He's a convincing liar. And there may be some truth to that, but there's also more to the story.]

Shun nodded. [He likes the family, not necessarily me,] he added, still stuck on that thought.

[Well...you hardly know each other. Give him time. He's been through a lot. I imagine trusting people is a challenge for him.]

Shun eyed her curiously but didn't ask her to elaborate.

A long silence fell between them. Aki had said what she'd wanted to, now it was his time to decide what he'd do with her words.

[You're right,] he said at last. [This is my life and I can't let my parents live it for me. Especially not from beyond the grave…] Tears glazed his eyes. [If you really meant it...then...then, I'd like to come back.]

Aki nodded tearfully, [I meant it,] she whispered. Then, she added, [That was kinda the point of you coming this weekend...Ashu's idea.] Tears broke her voice.

[His idea?] Shun asked.

Aki nodded. Then, for the first time in many years, her head fell to his shoulder and she cried. And so did he. They cried together for a long while and they talked a bit more, deciding he would begin looking for a new job in Izumo and leave Tokyo as soon as he could. That is, of course, if his children were okay with it. Aki insisted they would be overjoyed, but Shun knew his actions hurt them, he wasn't so sure they'd accept him back just like that. So they talked and cried, and eventually, wandered back to Eiji and Ash's home hand-in-hand.

When Ash woke Eiji had already left his spot on the couch. The tell-tale sounds of water traveling through pipes indicated he was upstairs in the shower. Ash blinked in the morning sunlight and looked across the room to where Miyuki sat on the floor, her back to Ash, eyes running over the framed photograph Eiji had gifted Ash the day before. With a single, delicate, finger, she traced the shape of Shorter's mohawk.

Miyuki sensed Ash was awake, watching her. Then, she heard him shift on the couch, confirming her gut feeling.

"Where will you hang him, Ash?" She asked softly, just in case he was actually still asleep and had simply rolled over.

Him. Not it. Him. Ash smiled.

"Not sure yet," he said sleepily. "Somewhere he can be really appreciated."

Miyuki nodded in agreement, her back still facing the photograph and away from Ash. "He deserves a place of honor." She heard Ash huff a laugh and glanced at him over her shoulder. "I know I didn't know him…" her voice trailed off momentarily. Her finger left the glass and she turned to face Ash. "But if he was your best friend, then I know he was a good person."

Ash nodded solemnly. "He was." Ash shifted and stretched his tired arms high above his head before dropping them back to his side. He sighed. "A giant goof and a bit of an ass...but a good guy." He smiled to himself. "A damn, quality dude."

Miyuki smiled, "Sounds like someone I know." She returned her eyes to the image of Shorter and Ash. "No wonder you two were friends." Her eyes found Eiji's shadow. "I guess Ei-chan knew him too? Were the three of you friends?" Miyuki startled as Ash sat beside her on the floor, she hadn't even heard him move.

"Yeah, we were. I knew Shorter a long time, much longer than your brother did, but Eiji fit right in."

She nodded. "Then he must miss him too."

Ash's brain was suddenly bombarded with the memory of Shorter's dead body collapsing on top of Eiji. They hardly talked about it, but Ash knew it was traumatic for them both.

"It was hard on us both," he told Miyuki seriously.

She nodded in understanding.

"Are you curious?" Ash asked.

"Huh?"

"About how he died," he explained.

"I am...I'm curious about most things," she admitted with a smirk. Then her face sobered and she added decidedly, "but I don't need to know. It's not my business."

"I appreciate that. And maybe one day I'll work up the courage to tell you the story."

"It's okay, Ash, I don't need to know," She reassured him. "But I do have a suggestion."

Ash looked at her, a puzzled expression on his face. "Yeah?"

"A suggestion about where he should go," she clarified. "I think he should go there," she pointed to the beginning of the hallway, which was a point of the house that could be seen clearly from both the entryway, the living room, and even parts of the kitchen and dining area. "And we could set up a table under him to act as his own little shrine." She paused to gauge his reaction. "We do that here. Make shrines for the dead in our homes. But it's okay if that's not something you'd want."

Ash sat in thought for a long moment. "Like in that movie? Oh...what was it called…" he closed his eyes in thought. He opened his eyes and snapped as the title came to him. "Poppy Hill! Like that?"

Miyuki thought back to the movie in which the main character's father had passed. An altar with his photograph, a vase of flowers, and a glass of water was featured in their home to honor his memory. "Yes," she smiled softly, "just like that."

Ash's eyes met Shorters through his shades. "I think that's a great idea."

Both their heads whipped sideways at the sound of the kitchen faucet. Shun had slipped into the kitchen without either of them noticing. He was already showered and dressed for the day, which was no surprise. What did come as a surprise was that now, he was standing at the sink, facing away from Miyuki and Ash, making...coffee?

[You drink coffee now, Dad?] Miyuki asked from the living room floor, not even bothering to say good morning.

Shun shook his head. [Ash does,] he replied simply.

Miyuki's eyebrows shot up in surprise. She grinned and looked at Ash. And then her face dropped as she found him peeling hastily at the edges of the bandage on his wrist, hands trembling slightly. She reached out a hand and caught his fingers.

"Is it really so surprising that he'd like you?" She whispered to Ash. "I promise it's not a dream."

Ash huffed and ripped the bandaid from his skin, not caring that it tugged painfully at the hairs on his arm.

Miyuki's message met his eyes.

"Oh POOP! I can't think of anything good to write! Grrrr...I love you! That will have to do! 3," it read in English.

Miyuki blushed as he read it.

"You do?" He asked, meeting her eyes.

She shoved his shoulder roughly. "Of course I do, you idiot!"

His heart burned inside his chest. "But you promised you wouldn't fall in love with me," he teased.

She gave him another rough shove. "Not like that, you ass," she said with a laugh. She stood and tugged him up forcefully by his arm. "Did it help though," she asked more seriously.

"Mmmm, it did."

"Good." She slapped his arm. Hard. "Come on! Coffee time!" She chirped excitedly and made her way to the kitchen.

Ash stared after her as she left the room. 'Pain is grounding,' her words from Tokyo came back to him. Two shoves, a tug, and a slap. She was more calculated than she let on. He glanced again at her message. He smiled and joined her and Shun in the kitchen.

At 10:30 AM sharp, Aki knocked on the front door. Miyuki beat Ash and Eiji to the door, slinging it open forcefully. Her dark eyes searched her mother's face desperately. Aki hugged her with a smile.

"Good morning, Mi-chan."

Aki walked into the house to find Ash, rejoined by Eiji, struggling to make breakfast for everyone.

"Ash! That's gonna burn! Flip it!" Eiji shouted across the kitchen to Ash.

"Sh- Crap!" Ash, distracted by Aki's arrival, returned his eyes to the skillet and flipped the fish he had on the stovetop. Thankfully, he had not burned them.

Eiji laughed and joined Ash at the stove with a carton of eggs and a skillet in his hands. "Rice and miso are done. Move over, I'm making omelets."

Ash made room for him. From the living room, the other Okumuras smiled at the sight of the two boys struggling to prepare everything in time.

[You should help them, Mom,] Miyuki said humorously. [Show mercy.]

Aki chuckled, [Watching is too much fun,] she joked. After a moment more she stood and walked to the kitchen to join them. She peeked through their arms to see their work on the stovetop.

[Oh! Not bad!] She remarked with surprise. She turned and held up a thumbs-up to Miyuki and Shun. "They are doing good job!"

Fifteen minutes later, they were all seated around the table, served with the breakfast Ash and Eiji had slaved over. Ash held his breath as Shun took his first bite, eager to impress, or at the very least, meet his expectations. The typically reserved man smiled to himself.

[Dare I say...better than Aki's?] He teased.

A grain of rice bounced off Ash's forehead. [Ashu, don't you know it's rude to surpass your teacher?] She teased.

Ash exhaled a laugh, eyes on his plate. [Whatever you say. I've never been a big fan of this stinky fish,] he teased, [so I really am no good judge of quality.]

[Well, I am, and I say it's good,] Aki assured him with a smile. [But not better than mine,] she added teasingly.

They continued to eat, making casual conversation, putting off the eventual conversation they all knew was coming. Miyuki complained about school starting up again the next day, saying summer break was never long enough. Eiji asked if she had started to think about universities yet and Miyuki told him to leave her alone, she refused to think about the stress of choosing a university during her last day of freedom. The Ash talked, telling them all about Miyuki's idea for Shorter's picture, which they all agreed was a lovely idea. Sadness coated Shun's face as Ash spoke. Then, Aki inquired about the English writing on Ash's wrist. She laughed as he let her read it. It was then Ash noticed the confusion on Shun's face.

Ash pulled his arm back to himself. He considered explaining the writing that Shun had seen twice now, but decided against it. He'd explain himself later, it wasn't a topic for the table.

A silence fell as they finished the last of their breakfast and Ash could tell by Aki's body language that she was about to broach the subject they all knew was coming.

Before she could say anything, Ash spoke. [Hey,] he began to no one in particular, [this is a family issue, so I don't mind wai-]

[Ashu,] Aki interrupted, [You are part of this family. Stay.]

Ash was flattered, but he shook his head. His eyes met Shun's. [It's your call. You won't offend me if you'd rather I leave. But if you lie to me, that will offend me,] he said, making himself clear.

It was brief, very brief, but Ash saw Shun's eyes glance at Aki and then Eiji.

[And no one's allowed to be offended on my behalf,] Ash added. Eiji bit back a smile as he heard Ash's boss voice make a rare appearance.

[I don't mind if you stay,] Shun said after a pregnant pause.

Ash nodded and remained seated.

And so they began. Aki and Shun took turns speaking, recounting the conversation of the previous night to their children. When Shun explained that his own mother had threatened to write him out of the family will, Ash accidentally lost his temper. He slammed both hands on the table and stood, the chair scraping loudly against the floor as he did so. Everyone was shocked by his outburst.

"Fuck that shit!" Ash cursed angrily in a language Okumura-san, thankfully, could not understand.

A second later he sat again, slightly embarrassed at his reaction. [Sorry.] He ran an angry hand through his hair. [Sorry, but that's bullshit.] He stood again and walked to the sink to get a glass of water. He chugged it, his back to the table, and repeated under his breath, "God, that's fucking bullshit." He chugged a second glass of water, hands trembling slightly with rage. Then, he just stood there silently at the sink.

Wide-eyed and sweating slightly, Shun cautiously continued speaking. [So...anyway...the problem wasn't solved when she died because it's all technically my father's money...plus...I did not blindly assume I'd even be welcomed back- And it would be selfish to deny the family that financial help. That could put Miyuki through college or-]

Shun stopped speaking when Ash stormed off, feet stomping, down the hall and up the stairs. They watched him leave with wide eyes. Eiji was really the only one who'd ever seen him this angry.

[He's...he's angry with me,] Shun assumed.

[No. No, I think he's angry for you,] Eiji corrected his father.

Seconds later, the stomping returned as Ash marched back to the kitchen. Directly in front of Shun, Ash slammed his palm onto the table, causing him to flinch in his seat. A pang of guilt coursed through Ash, he hadn't meant to scare him. He inhaled deeply, forcing himself to calm slightly. There was something under his hand, though no one could yet see what it was. Ash stared Shun down with fiery, intense eyes.

"Theoretically speaking, money's no object, what do you do?" Ash spat, not having the wits to switch languages. "Someone. Translate," he barked.

Eiji did so.

Shun looked at Aki then back at Ash. [I'd...I'd move back to Izumo...find a new job.] He glanced at Aki again. [I'd move back in with Aki...if and when she'd have me.]

Tears began to stream down Aki's face. She had already guessed what was under that hand of his.

"You'd come back to your family? Swear?" Ash said wildly.

Eiji translated again.

Shun nodded in confirmation. [Y-yes, so long as that's what they want,] he responded shakily.

Ash nodded. [Good.] Finally, he lifted his hand from the table to reveal a check for ¥11,000,000 (or roughly $100,000 USD).

Shun gasped as he read the amount and shoved the check back towards Ash. [I cannot take that!]

"Take it!" Ash slid the check back to Shun. "It's my money and I get to decide how I spend it, and I'm choosing to spend it on this family. Deal with it."

Eiji translated and Shun choked up. With shaking hands and burning eyes, he picked up the slip of paper and stared at it.

"They say money can't buy happiness, but sometimes it absolutely fucking can." He ran a hand through his hair, "And there's more if you were to need it. Just say so and it's yours."

Eiji translated with the omission of one word.

"Good thing I fucking stayed," Ash muttered to himself, "for fuck's sake."

[Wha-what did he say?] Shun asked Eiji, his voice cracking with leveed tears.

Eiji blinked back his own tears now and rolled his eyes at Ash's language. [He says that it's a good thing he stayed.]

Shun nodded and then began speaking to Aki and Eiji, likely about how uncomfortable he was taking Ash's generous gift.

As they were talking, Ash leaned close to Miyuki, who was sitting in the chair beside him, "Eiji's a pretty shitty translator, censoring all my words like that," he scoffed, humor returning to his voice.

Miyuki wiped a tear from her face. "I would never," she joked back.

"Right? Your father's a man, he can handle an f-bomb or two," Ash knew this because Shun had said so himself just a few days prior at the airport.

"But, Ash," she nudged his ribs with her elbow, "maybe that's a sign you don't need a translator...you can tell he censored your speech."

"I was too angry to cuss in a foreign language," he replied with a smirk and a nudge of his own.

"Ah," she grinned up at the taller blond beside her. Her dark eyes held a peculiar twinkle. "I see."

"Hey," a seriousness washed over Ash. He leaned in close and whispered in her ear. "I told you not to go falling in love with me."

Miyuki pulled back from him sharply. "I haven't!"

Miyuki's chirp made the other three Okumuras paused their own conversation to look her way.

She ignored them. "Ash," she said seriously, "I promise I haven't. Not like that. I swear."

He believed her. His face returned to its default. With a raised brow, he said, "Swear?"

She slapped her right hand over her heart. "Swear."

He held out his hand and she instantly grabbed it and shook it with an iron grip. "Swear," she repeated.

Ash crossed his arms. "I believe you."

"What on Earth are you two on about?" Eiji asked.

Miyuki's mouth tightened into a thin, straight line. Ash was ever teasing, she was certain that wouldn't change now. But he surprised her.

"Don't worry about it, Eiji," Ash said nonchalantly.

Relief flooded Miyuki. She really wasn't in love with him. She loved him, yes, but not romantically. But also not in the same way she loved Eiji or any other family member. Her love for him was different. Platonic, maybe, but certainly not romantic.

But it wasn't long ago that Ash couldn't even imagine himself experiencing romantic love. Non-romantic love? Love that truly wanted nothing more than for him to be happy? To just be his friend? The way Miyuki loved him? And even Aki, though she loved him like her own son...That was a whole 'nother beast. It was something he still struggled to wrap his head around at times. He believed Miyuki because he could tell she was telling him the truth, but that didn't mean he could fully understand being worthy of such a feeling.

Eiji pouted and squinted at Ash slightly, "Tell me later?" Eiji asked.

Miyuki tensed while Ash pretended to consider it. "Maybe," As began. Miyuki pursed her lips nervously. "But maybe not. We'll see," he finished.

If Shun hadn't been at the table, Eiji would have flashed Ash the finger. Instead, he tried his best to communicate the sentiment through a glare. Ash received his message loud and clear. He shook his head and exhaled a laugh. "What a morning. I need a drink," he said as he rose from the table.

"It's not even noon," Eiji reasoned.

Ash groaned and spun away from the fridge dramatically to face the others. [Does anyone care if I have a drink even though, as dear Eiji pointed out, it is not yet late enough in the day to be socially acceptable?]

That got a few chuckles.

Eiji rolled his eyes, now he really wanted to flip him off. [Don't patronize me, Ash,] he grumbled.

[Well?] Ash asked the table.

[Get me one too,] Shun said with a ghost of a smile.

[Sure thing, Dad.]

The word 'dad' slipped out, he hadn't meant to say it. And Ash worried he'd messed up, but he feigned confidence and fetched them both a beer. When he handed Shun the beer, Ash couldn't read his face, so he decided to err on the side of caution.

[Sorry, I-] he stammered, [probably too much, huh?]

With a delightful fizzy pop, Shun cracked open his beer. [I don't mind,] he said with a soft smile, one that Ash had seen on Eiji before. Ash returned the smile with a half-smile of his own. He cracked open his own beer and downed half of it in one go.

[Didn't you just become of drinking age yesterday?] Shun asked.

Ash became flustered, unsure if Shun was teasing him or actually calling him out. He rubbed the back of his head nervously. [I- uh-]

Shun broke out in laughter, [I am only teasing!]

"Shit," Ash cursed under his breath and downed the rest of the beer.

[Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you,] Shun apologized, just in case he'd somehow offended Ash.

[It's fine, you're all good,] he told him genuinely. [It's just a lot of emotions to handle before noon. I need a 20-year nap like Rip Van Fu- Winkle,] he joked, although there was some truth to it.

Shun's brow furrowed. [Who?]

Ash forgot that the Japanese literature curriculum was probably completely different from an American one. And even though Ash didn't have a formal education, he was certainly well versed in all the classics.

[Sorry, cultural difference,] Ash said [forget it.] He scrubbed his hands over his emotionally exhausted face. [Point is I need a nap after all that.]

A night spent cramped on the couch was also not helping his energy levels.

Ash stood, presumably to go take a nap, but Shun caught him by the wrist. Without thinking, Ash violently snatched his own hand away. Old habits die hard. Trauma-induced instinct dies harder. Shun looked genuinely frightened.

[Sorry!] They said in unison.

"Sorry," Ash repeated, unintentionally switching to English. "I just don't like to be tou- you startled me is all"

[You startled him,] Eiji began to explain, [He doesn't' like to be touched without warning, that's all. He isn't angry.]

Shun's face twisted in obvious pain. Aki's words from the previous night resounded in his brain.

[He's had a rough life. Give him time. He's been through a lot. I imagine trusting people is a challenge for him.]

He still had no idea what that meant exactly, but he knew he just messed up big time.

Ash muttered another "Sorry," and then slunk away like a frightened house cat in a room full of guests.

Shun stared guiltily after him as he left.

[You couldn't have known,] Eiji began, [but he's been abused most of his life.] Eiji looked at the table and fiddled mindlessly with his engagement ring. [Sexual abuse,] he clarified. Shun inhaled sharply at the words. [It isn't my place to go into detail, but I will tell you that much, at least. That's why he doesn't like to be touched, at least not without warning or his permission.]

Shun paled, looking suddenly like he might be sick. [God, I'm so sorry, I had no idea! I-]

[It's alright, Dad. I know that and he knows that too.]

[Go check on him, Ei-chan,] Aki suggested after a moment.

Eiji nodded and headed up the stairs after Ash. He found him lying directly in the middle of their bed, covered in the blanket Aki bought him.

"I'm fine, Eiji," he said without even turning his head to see him. "Instinct, that's all."

Eiji closed the door behind him and sat on the side of the bed, not touching Ash.

"You don't look fine," he argued gently.

"I was just hoping that..somehow...your dad wouldn't have to learn about my fucked up past...but I...I lingered on the stairs and I heard what you said." There was no resentment in his words, he was simply recounting facts.

"I'm sorry, should I not have told him that much?" Eiji asked with concern.

"No, it's fine. I would have said basically the same thing next time I saw him anyway. Something like that can't go unexplained." Ash took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "You all should think of something fun to do with the rest of the day."

"And you?"

"Let me sleep an hour and then I'll join you."

Eiji placed a gentle hand on his back and rubbed his hand back and forth soothingly. "Okay," he whispered. He stood and began to leave the room.

As he reached the entryway, Ash said, "Eiji, wait."

Eiji turned, "Yeah?"

"Just don't let them pick the beach, okay?"

He couldn't bear to be shirtless, scars blazing, in front of the whole family, especially Shun. Eiji understood.

"Got it." Eiji left, turning off the lights and closing the door softly behind him as he did so.