For Chapter 61, I created an accompanying illustration featuring "Bucky with the good hair." ;) Please check out this chapter on Archive of Our Own to see the art!

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Winter of the White Wolf


Chapter 61 - Sedimentary Rock and Sinkholes


The unrelenting noonday sun blared down upon Ayo's head, sending a particularly pesky rivulet of sweat down her brow and directly into her left eye. Were it not that her fingers presently clung tightly to a rocky wall, she might've cleared the salty sting from her vision, but instead she forced herself to squint, riding out the discomfort with private solidarity of purpose.

It did not make the time it took to clear any less troublesome.

"Babiza oku kukhwela simahla, uyazi," Yama's youthful voice observed from slightly above Ayo's left shoulder in crisp, clear Wakandan. "Nangona ndingacingi ukuba siphakame ngokwaneleyo phezu komhlaba ukuze sifumane amawonga."

They call this free climbing, you know. Though I don't think we are high enough above the ground yet to warrant accolades.

Nomble mumbled in their shared mother tongue from beside and a short distance below Ayo's right hip, "You must have taken efforts to practice this climb before us." Her Lieutenant's tone was not explicitly an accusation, but it was abundantly clear that this was not among her favored activities.

"I did no such thing!" Yama defended, smoothly reaching up to grab a rocky handhold before pulling herself higher yet, ever-closer to the break in the wall overhead. "In my childhood I spent a great deal of time scouring the tops of the finest acacia trees, so you might consider climbing a chosen aptitude."

"Well I climbed a lot as a kid too," a male voice added from just below Ayo's right foot in Wakandan that bore a peculiar accent. "Lotta fire escapes and that sort of thing, but it definitely involved two hands."

Ayo found herself glancing down in his direction so she could better see how he was faring with his climb, and to catch the expression that accompanied his remark. When her eyes briefly met his blue ones, she found he wasn't slipping into a place of self-loathing, so much as somehow enjoying the opportunity to leverage a spot of self-deprecating humor. As if to reassure her that his words weren't explicitly a complaint, he offered her a small self-assured smile that had a way of channeling Yama's own boastful confidence.

His handling of the many subtleties of their favored dialect still left something to be desired, but his handling of the intention behind the words was remarkably apt, especially since he'd chosen to learn Yoruba, Hausa, and a scattering of regional African dialects at the same time. Even General Okoye, who privately questioned the wisdom of continuing to spend so much time and resources on a foreigner, had come to find his genuine interest and aptitude in immersing himself in the cultures around him suitably impressive.

While Yama was clearly the best climber among them (and her Lieutenant had made no attempts to humble herself once Ayo had made the mistake of framing the day's activities as a social outing of sorts), Ayo felt certain the man below them was consciously choosing to trail slightly below Nomble.

Yama chuffed as she scrambled ever-higher towards the ledge waiting a short distance above them, "Says the only one among us with a panther's strength. Lest I remind you, you were the one that suggested a 'proper African wilderness excursion,' White Wolf."

The smile across his tanned, but pale face spread into a genuine grin set amongst a mane of long, sweaty brown hair, "So that's how it's gonna be now?"

"It was you who chose to claim the name as your own!" Yama observed, "If it interests you, perhaps Nomble might find herself willing to concoct a story about how the name was granted to you by mystical spirits of the Wakandan plains, rather than that it originated from the playful lips of mischievous school children. You know, if it better suits your Western sensibilities."

"I will do no such thing!" Nomble insisted as the bearded man in question barked out a short laugh.

"Yama…" Ayo groaned, though her mild reproach only made Yama's devious smile broaden. Seemingly oblivious to the whims of gravity, her fleet-fingered and remarkably sure-footed Lieutenant moved higher yet. Though it wasn't common practice for Dora Milaje to be seen rock climbing in their traditional regalia, Ayo was pleased at the additional challenge it posed, even though the adaptable soles of their toed vibranium boots certainly helped.

That being as it was, Ayo was surprised how quickly James had chosen to adopt the nickname as his own, though she'd taken care to privately inquire if it was to his taste, or if he was simply tolerating it out of perceived obligation. He'd made it clear his preference was borne from a place of willingness and choice, and he found he favored it as a way of signifying the new life he was trying his best to carve out for himself. That it was his own.

'White Wolf' had an unexpected way of suiting him. Not that it was up to Ayo to rate such things, but she was quickly finding it increasingly preferable to others names she'd sampled on her tongue. 'Bucky' had a strange way of feeling oddly out of place, as if it was a name for a different person entirely.

When another bead of sweat began to collect along her brow, Ayo tilted her head back in an attempt to coax it away from her eyes. High above, she caught the silhouette of Yama continuing to scale the side of the rocky cliff like she'd earned a blessing directly from the bleating gods of the mountain goats themselves. She easily had bus-length or more on the rest of their makeshift climbing group, and showed no signs of slowing. Comparatively, it was not that Nomble was timid of the climb or the growing distance below her feet, but it was clear she would have favored using one of the many technologies available to her to aid her climb, rather than relying on the strength of her fingers alone to negotiate her path skyward.

Interestingly, the man watching her carefully placed handholds seemed more at-ease, even though he climbed with only one arm.

When he'd first come to Wakanda, it was easy to be more aware of his injury. In those early days, it was not as if he complained about it, but it was common to see him move as if he expected his left arm to be there, only to be swiftly reminded of its absence. Shuri had quickly connected him with instructors and physical therapists to help him adapt, but it took time to train the mind and body to something that it intrinsically believed was still present, especially when HYDRA's meddling had shaped the cruel prosthetic they'd grafted to him as a shining example of strength, and influenced his him to believe it should behave as his dominant hand.

Now, it was not as if Ayo was unaware of this disability, but her understanding of it and how he regarded it had changed and evolved over the passing months. Like the nails monsters that considered themselves scientists once struck through his skull and drove into his brain, Ayo'd initially been unaware of the many painful internal mechanisms and complex wiring that had been strewn beneath his flesh by his captors. When he'd originally come to them, his chrome prosthetic arm had been cruelly severed just below the shoulder. It had only been after numerous surgeries that it had been made clear how precious little of the underlying form remained.

Godless Butchers, Shuri had called them.

The procedures and many surgeries to remove the remnants of the arm and repair the damage done were extensive, especially when they quickly became aware of the many dangerous contingencies HYDRA had put into place to prevent such unauthorized tampering.

The sight of his empty shoulder had a way of swiftly reminding Ayo of the many questions he'd asked concerning what assistive technologies might be available to him in a time when he need not worry about the press of the code words.

When it became clear his curiosity drew him to wonder about procedures that would entail further surgeries, Shuri had chosen to table the topic for a later time, once the flesh of his shoulder was suitably mended from the plethora of recent surgeries he'd already endured.

But the shawls White Wolf regularly wore had a way of filling out his shoulder while the tender flesh hidden underneath continued to heal. Today, he was clad in a pair of rugged crocodile green cargo pants, thick brown boots, and a grey diagonal striped shirt that was accented by a striking blue shawl slung around his neck and over his absent shoulder that had a way of politely obscuring his injury.

…On second glance… Ayo was fairly certain the textured azure fabric matched a bandana of one of those goats Yama'd coaxed him into naming. Ayo maintained she would not give in to Yama's insistence that it would be a kindness to learn their names. Goats didn't need names. They were goats.

That being as it was, now that the many snarls had been removed from his flesh, White Wolf seemed… lighter. As if true steps had been made down the path of his recovery. And as he jammed the toes of his own vibranium-enhanced boots into the rock and used one hand to pull himself higher, Ayo also didn't miss that in the brief moment Nomble's grip faltered and sent her quickly scrambling to readjust her footing, that the man climbing nearby had preemptively shifted himself to assist.

He didn't say anything. Didn't call attention to it. He'd just… moved his right shoulder so it was in position below Nomble's left foot in case it was needed to support her weight.

Ayo didn't think Nomble saw it, but Ayo certainly did. When she met those blue eyes of his again, he simply shrugged, acknowledging his unspoken intention, one that did not call into question the strength and mettle of the Dora Milaje, only that he would not see them come to any harm or distress under his steadfast watch.

Long strands of sweaty brown hair stuck to the sides of his tan cheeks, but if you looked at him then, you might not have been able to glimpse the many private concerns in his haunted eyes, but Ayo saw them still. In the wake of the recent oath she'd made to him, he hadn't asked if she'd already memorized the series of Russian words Shuri believed could unmake his mind, but she felt the weight of the questions in his gaze. On their own, each Russian word was strangely innocent, but they fell through his memory like water, jostling something deep inside that rightfully terrified him.

But Ayo had yet to speak them aloud to any audience aside from the mirror in her bathroom. She dreaded the day when it would be her solemn responsibility to speak them with clear intention so White Wolf could hear them.

He must've sensed the weight sitting deep in her gut, because he immediately sought a way to offer levity with his words, "...I don't take it any of you thought to pack an extra hair band..?"

Ayo smiled lightly and shook her head at the ridiculousness of the question he posed to three bald-headed Dora Milaje. She pulled herself to a higher handhold as Yama all-but hopped over the last crest of marbled grey rock and turned around so she could offer encouragements from mount-high, "If we cannot find something suitable, we can always request a drone to deliver a package of them," her dusty fingers crept into the many hidden pockets of her regalia in search of an illusive if altogether unlikely accessory.

"Please don't."

Yama grinned mischievously as she plopped down and swung her legs out over the drop and dug into one of her side pockets. With a practiced Dora Milaje flourish, she produced a thin blue hairband which she promptly tossed high into the air and caught with her other hand. Still smiling, she threaded it through her fingers, buying time while the rest of them continued their climb, "For all your awe surrounding our many technologies, I still find it curious how much sheer distaste you have for our drones, even the cute little ones with their melodic chatter in the cafeteria."

"I just have… history… with other ones, I guess," he deflected whilst pressing the front of his left shoulder against a groove in the buckling cliff-face so he could grasp a higher hand-hold just below and to the side of Nomble's chosen path.

"I would think our Princess would enjoy introducing you to one of the many companion drones she and the Design Group are developing," Yama mused, intent on idle chatter while those below her strained from their climb.

"If it's all the same to you: I'll stick with the goats. They're better company."

Often when they were together, it was alongside Princess Shuri or other members of the royal family, so Ayo's Lieutenants were tasked with standing guard and being seen rather than heard. In the absence of this protocol, Yama appeared to be enjoying the opportunity to share what was on her mind with little hesitation.

Under other circumstances, Ayo might have found herself seeking to encourage her to exercise restraint more becoming of her station as a Dora Milaje, but as the warm Wakandan sun shone down upon them, Ayo found herself basking in the kind smiles of those under her watch, and White Wolf as well. Their straightforwardness and honesty. She was quick to remind herself that like her, her Lieutenants had endured acute strain at the Battle of Mount Bashenga some months ago, and it was not unreasonable to allow them to share moments like this where they could breathe easy with each other and not feel as if they must always wear a mask of duty.

That being as it was, Ayo knew their expressions and cordial manners would be tempered soon. All of them.

Perhaps that was why she found herself freely allowing them to linger on awhile longer, as if these lighter moments were a reminder of who they were beneath their respective duties.

Who the others were, at least. Ayo knew she was not permitted the same convenience. She must always be 'Ayo.'

Trying to be mindful of the tepid expression on her face, Ayo used the strength in her arms and shoulders to heft herself up and over the crest of the rocky ledge before getting to her feet so she could step to the side and ensure her movement didn't create any stray dust that risked hindering Nomble and White Wolf's continued climb a short distance blow.

She stood tall and stretched her back as she looked out over the lush and picturesque noontime view around her, discreetly picking out grit from beneath her nails as she did. From her vantage point, it was clear they'd made it about halfway up one of the taller mountains forming the western crest of Primitive Peaks. Though the mountain continued higher yet, it grew steeper and far more precarious. To climb further would require legitimate gear and safety equipment beyond today's respectable precautions. That being as it was, today's trek into the heart of the mountains and along their rocky spines hadn't been amateur fare. Ayo'd intentionally chosen it as a means to deepen their bonds and push the four of them towards activities that were a far cry from their customary day-to-day interactions. She hoped the change of scenery might afford them the opportunity to speak candidly away from other prying eyes.

Even Shuri's.

Their Princess remained with Tasdi and others back at the Design Center, no doubt running simulations and algorithms concerning White Wolf's troubled mind. If Ayo squinted and leaned forward, she could just make out the fine tip of the building's towering steeple in the distance. The sight of it had a way of swiftly reminding her aching body of just how far they'd trekked to get to their remote location high in the mountains. The blisters on her feet were not in disagreement that White Wolf's decision to wear hiking boots was likely superior to her own insistence on protocol and decorum.

Though the scenic sight spread open before her was lush as it was beautiful, Ayo found herself looking forward to when she could take shelter in the loving shade of the tall trees a short distance behind her. Soon enough, in any case.

Wordlessly, she sat beside Yama and folded her legs under her while they waited patiently for first Nomble and then White Wolf to finish their respective climbs. White Wolf brushed his hand over his pant leg, shucking off the loose grit from between his fingers before he turned and settled himself onto the grass between Ayo and Nomble so he could share their view. In a remarkably carefree, if child-like choice, he tucked one leg under the other so he could allow his free leg to swing over the open air below. Once they'd collectively caught their breaths, one-by-one they each freed their water bottles from the small supply packs slung behind their shoulders and drank deeply, sharing the refreshing water together as if they were assembled around a sky-high watering hole.

But what a view it was. They sat in silence as they drank and let their bodies rest awhile from their latest exertion and the extended time they'd spent basking out in the oppressive sun. None of them spoke to how remarkably dirty and sweat-drenched they were, but Yama made a show of tossing the hairband she'd scrounged up over her head to the man seated on the other side of Ayo. He caught it easily as she remarked, "You will have to thank my little sister for loaning you her hair accessory the next time you see her. If you choose to use it, you will be obligated to acquiesce to the agreement bound to it."

White Wolf held the thin blue hairband between his fingers as if evaluating it for flaws, but there was an easy smile spread across his face, "Is that so?"

"It is," Yama agreed, tilting her chin skyward, as if reciting a promise, "She said since I have found a way to circumvent her desire to learn how to braid different styles of hair, she wishes to practice on yours."

Nomble looked to be doing her best to keep the grin on her face from growing wider, "I would very much like to see your little sister work her craft."

"Fine fine," White Wolf hastily agreed, striking the necessary accord between them as he ran his hand through his sweaty hair and pulled what he could of his shoulder-length brown strands behind his head. His attention briefly turned to Nomble, "Could you….?"

She smiled and said nothing as she turned to help him, pulling the longest of his hair into a bun at the back of his head. There was only so much good the hairband could do, as the remainder of the chunky strands framing his face were too short to comply to her will.

Yama might've considered saying something else, but the smile on her face only widened as Nomble finished her task to the song of 'thanks' and they returned to basking in the noonday heat. The shared silence between them was easy at first, but once Ayo's water bottle was half drained, she was well aware her Lieutenants' eyes were upon her, as if they now waited for her to broach the tender subjects they knew were at the core of Ayo's chosen outing.

White Wolf was the only one among them who was yet unaware. Although he hadn't requested clarity concerning the underlying purpose of their wilderness excursion, Ayo knew him well enough to believe he suspected there was further intention behind her actions. But he remained polite. Patient. Questioned nothing as he took in the simple pleasure of their company, in seeing the grandeur of Warrior Falls from a distance, and testing the bounds of their physical fitness after so many days and weeks of sitting and standing within a stone's throw of the Design Center and its endless tests.

Ayo knew she could not delay the conversation she needed to have forever, but as she breathed in the mountain air, she did her best to remind herself that in nearly a week to the very hour, she and those around her would be assembled together in Shuri's Laboratory so Ayo could speak a specific series of code words for the first time. In doing so, Shuri hoped the process would allow her to try to diagnose the crux of how they functioned so that they might be swiftly removed.

Though it pained Shuri to admit it, her well-wrought algorithms could only do so much. The next step required clinical trials. Required White Wolf – James – to surrender his free will so that they might in time heal him.

Ayo wanted to believe she would only have to speak the words once, but the wiser part of her knew that the countless atrocities done to his mind and body spanned decades, and that it followed that unseen trials lay ahead of them.

It required them to step forward with eyes wide open.

But in the present moment, White Wolf teased his fingers along the loose strands of hair that hadn't managed to be captured by the noble bun Nomble'd set in his hair. Satisfied with her work, he put his hand on the ground and leaned back, taking in the view, but he spared a moment to glance in Ayo's direction. As he did, Ayo caught something that lay beneath his warm smile. A very particular wariness that spoke to knowing that beyond the climb and casual conversation, there was intention behind her actions.

There was something more, too. It wasn't something inappropriate, of course. He was never inappropriate, even in jest, but the way his soulful blue eyes held hers… how he let her in to see the quiet worry he hid so well… It was a deeper connection than she was accustomed to sharing with others around her. As if by her oath to bear the burden of speaking the words, he'd entrusted something else to her in their pact. Some part of himself. The part that acknowledged both the suffocating guilt of the horrors pressed against his conscience, and what he rightly feared he was capable of in the wrong hands.

And that he trusted her to stop him if it came to that.

When she first heard of this pale-skinned foreigner that had been dropped on their doorstep, she never would have guessed she would be the one he would choose to entrust with the code words that so plagued him. It was a remarkable honor to be held in such high esteem by someone she had no familiarity with before a few months ago. And now? Though the first test of Shuri's mettle was a week away, his request of Ayo and her oath of service to him had also fundamentally changed their relationship.

She didn't have a word for it in any language her pen or tongue knew, though she wished she did. Her inability to properly define the new shared bond of trust and profound stewardship that lay before them was oddly frustrating, as if being able to encapsulate it into a pattern of syllables might make it easier to explain. It did not trump her oaths to Wakanda or her promise to keep the royal family safe, yet it was somehow just as deep. Just as profound.

When he looked at her now, she was certain he felt it too, and it was why he'd opted to not question what intentions lay beyond their scenic climb. He simply waited for when her words might finally present themselves.

The conversation she wished to have, knew they must have, was not due to be an easy one, and that was why she could delay it no further, even if it bore to light a subject he would find distasteful.

His clear blue eyes were already resting on hers as she took a final gulp of water and set the metal canister into the grass beside her so her hands could be free as she spoke. The rhythm of her words came in slow, measured English because she knew what she had to say was far too important to risk being lost in translation. "A week from now, Princess Shuri's algorithms willing, we will be together with our King, Okoye, and Tasdi as we test the first series of code words." Ayo waited to see if White Wolf would react, but instead he set his jaw and listened for what words lay beyond the stated plans he already knew, "That is why we are gathered here. So we might prepare for contingencies."

He frowned, "...for 'contingencies?'"

Ayo took a deep, centering breath, "The path ahead of us remains an uncertain one. Though all of us hope for a smooth procedure and pray to Bast for a speedy resolution to that which ails your mind, it is wise to prepare ourselves for less desirable possibilities amid the path to recovery."

White Wolf's eyebrows knitted together before he glanced first at Nomble and then Yama, as if hoping he might be able to glean the details of Ayo's full intentions from their now Dora-neutral expressions alone. "...You're doing an admirable job talking around what you're trying to say in your introduction here, but what are you getting at? Why are we here?"

"We are here," Ayo spoke purposefully, choosing to ignore the alert way Yama watched the two of them like a meerkat scout, "because we need to familiarize ourselves with the way you fight." Her tone shifted, "The way he fights."

White Wolf blinked once, twice, and abruptly got to his feet as if seeking to immediately exit the conversation before Ayo could speak another syllable, "Yeah… we're not doing that."

Ayo and the women seated nearby stood up in his wake, "This is not a matter of preference, but of safety."

White Wolf shook his head in a decided attempt to table the subject as he faced Ayo, firm, "No. It's not necessary. I already tested the restraints. King T'Challa did too. If all you're planning to do is to ask me to stay seated in the chair, that's what I'll do. That's how it works." There was a new intensity to those blue eyes of his, "I can't fight my handlers. I'm pretty sure they did some very specific wiring to make sure of that."

He might've met her resolve, but this was not a matter that was up for debate. She knew his declaration was not meant to pose doubt on how she planned to wield the unspoken power she now held over his mind and body, so she chose to ignore it. His reaction was not about her or the trust between them, but the dark spirits he danced with for so long, the ones that threatened him from the shadows still, "I swore to you that I will not let you hurt anyone, and will never command you to do actions otherwise against your will. The conviction of my oath has not changed, but after what I have seen, what we have both seen, I cannot pretend there are no further risks. Especially once we step beyond this next unexplored precipice."

"There's no need," White Wolf concluded with far more certainty than any of them could truly possess. It was as if he thought words alone might brush away Ayo's conviction.

"That is not for you to decide." Ayo did not miss that Nomble and Yama's alert eyes flickered between her and White Wolf, as if gauging who would be the first to acquiesce.

It would not be Ayo.

White Wolf made a dour face at her declaration, and then had the nerve to turn his back to her and step away, presuming that his continued lack of interest would somehow conclude the discussion.

That was not how this would go.

Years of focused training flared in Ayo's belly at the sight of his decided disrespect towards her, towards all of them. Her instincts made her consider extending her spear so she could use the shoe of it to knock his ungrateful legs out from under him. Or perhaps she could cast her spear so it would land in the ground in front of his toes as a warning that her words were not to be willfully ignored.

Instead, she tempered her thoughts and set her jaw, allowing him to walk uninhibited across the grass to a shaded alcove a short distance from the cliff face. Satisfied he'd made his point, he settled himself back into grass, taking shelter under a dappled canopy of trees, mistakenly believing that somehow their leaves might hide him from her fierce glare.

The blue eyes that met hers were quietly defiant. A warning. And Ayo had to force down the part of her that sought to swiftly reprimand him as if he were an obstinate child. She found herself repeating once and over again that their ways were not his. That he was not a new recruit. Not hers to command. She had no desire to provoke him unnecessarily, at least not without trying all other available options at her disposal first. "Our conversation is not concluded," she stated evenly, but her tone was unwavering as it was direct.

His eyebrows furled self-consciously before he returned his attention to the expansive view before him, "Yeah, it is." He adjusted his jaw and allowed his breathing to settle in what Ayo took as a poor attempt at forced meditation. When he spoke, his tone softened, shifting into a voice that craved understanding and a release from Ayo's chosen topic, "Look. All that's behind me. So unless someone is going to order me to go back to that life, I'm not planning to raise a hand like that against anyone again. Especially not any of you."

Ayo knew the sentiment in his words was spoken with intention, but well-meaning as the words and assurances were, there was an ocean between where they'd chosen to plant themselves, and it was a gap they needed to cross.

It was easy to look at White Wolf and see only a tired man bearing a grievous injury and one good arm. At a glance, some might even assume from his somewhat haggard appearance that he was unable to defend himself, and certainly not skilled enough to inflict remarkable violence upon others. In truth, Ayo had not seen just what he or the Soldier were capable of firsthand. The only one of them that had in recent memory was King T'Challa, who had fought both of them in some way.

First, he'd sought to kill James when he was on the run in Bucharest, back when T'Challa mistakenly believed him to be responsible for his father's death. Later, T'Challa faced him once again without realizing it was now the Soldier he fought at Zemo's behest.

But even then, it was not the whole story. James would later claim he only had only fractured memories of what Zemo had requested of him beyond information concerning Siberia and a few very specific HYDRA missions. T'Challa believed this to be no coincidence. Their King maintained that Zemo likely sent James out as a distraction, that he was perhaps even meant to be captured and interrogated by Steve Rogers.

In the time after, James and T'Challa would come to blows again at an airport in Germany as he and Steve Rogers fled towards a trap Zemo had laid for the Avengers in Siberia.

Though T'Challa had fought James twice and the Soldier once, in the time since, he had come to suspect many other things, one of which was that he believed Zemo may have very well instructed the Soldier to not operate in his most deadly state. That Zemo's choices were a game of stones set amongst misdirects rather than clear intentions.

So as it was, Ayo had every reason to believe that none of them, not even King T'Challa, knew what the man before her was truly capable of, especially when White Wolf made every effort to make himself small and unobtrusive. Non-threatening. But his own perceptions of the warrior women across from him were watered down too, simplified into something intentionally made to appear both benign and palatable. They were strong, athletic women that guarded and protected Wakanda with their very lives… but all he had yet seen of them were what outsiders were meant to see.

Perhaps they were both alike in that way. That the manner in which they chose to present themselves were not disingenuous, but they were each capable of more. Ayo knew the strengths and weaknesses of her Dora, how they fought, and how that meshed into interplay as teams or a single unit. She was aware of King T'Challa's capabilities, and how they compared and contrasted with those of King T'Chaka before him, back when he bore the mantle and strength of the Black Panther.

More than that, Ayo was aware each of them had shed blood. Not because they took pleasure in it, but because it was necessary. They had witnessed death and sent others to join their ancestors with decided intention.

But speaking openly about such difficult matters and putting it to practice were vastly different skills. And not all who wished to be Dora Milaje, King's Guard, War Dogs, or soldiers were suited to walk these challenging paths, regardless of how capable or committed they believed themselves to be.

It had taken time for Ayo to begin to cultivate the eye for it that Aneka had. Her combat instructor had a way of being able to see into the hearts and minds of her students. Aneka could weed out those that could spar admirably with those that could skillfully wield their mind, body, and spirit in unison to know when and how to disable, and when it was critical that a blow must be final. Like the King's Guard, a Dora Milaje must not be overzealous to seek a lethal blow, but they also must not shy away if the situation called for it.

And her Lieutenants and others had done what was necessary in the recent Battle of Mount Bashenga. While the thought of that awful conflict had a way of raising Ayo's ire, it was also a swift reminder that she and her Dora had chosen this way of life, even now. That the skills they learned and sharpened were borne from their own desires, and that this portion of their lives was unlike that of the man sitting under the leaves a distance away.

Ayo had no need to ask him for clarity on if he'd joined the war efforts of his countrymen of his own free will or if he'd been conscripted into service, because at the end of the day, what had happened in the years thereafter was clearly not who he'd meant to become, nor who he wished to see himself as now.

And Ayo hated that this was the present juncture they found themselves at, but today, she needed to see what their White Wolf hid beneath his antelope's hide, regardless of whether he willed it or not.

At the same time, she needed him to see her too. To see the remarkable skill of those around him, and to realize that they were fully-capable of standing up to him, but that they needed to see his teeth so they could better learn how they might defend themselves and ultimately subdue him if such an undesirable altercation ever were to arise. But if all he did was show his belly and back to them, nothing could be learned. Not unless she provoked him. While she had sizable experience doing just that with her Dora, it seemed a distasteful option for a man that had already endured so much at the hands of others.

And so, Ayo persisted, attempting to reach him with measured words, "You may choose a life of peace," she agreed, "Not I, or anyone in Wakanda would seek to force you to take steps down a path that is not of your own wishes. But that is not what we speak of now. This is not a discussion of future plans, but of safety in the present and coming weeks ahead. It is acknowledgement that HYDRA's methods were unspeakably cruel and sinister, and like the physical snares they installed inside you, we do not yet know the true depths of what they might have been capable of in regards to your mind. As Wakandan's Chief of Security, an esteemed member of the Dora Milaje, your oathbearer, and your friend, it is my duty to insist that we not ignore the possibilities lying beneath the surface of our words. We are both of us too old to presume there is no cause for concern, even if it is not rooted in our own making."

She took a step towards him, lowering her voice's timbre as she added, "You are well aware of the many clever snares placed within your flesh that were intended to harm you and any who thought to free you of such hardware. We do not know if we will face similar trials again."

Ayo had hoped that he would meet her concerns with wisdom, but the voice that returned her inquiry was firm, and coated with a dark undertone she was not used to hearing from his lips, "I won't fight you, Ayo. And I'm certainly not gonna take time to figure out how to compare and contrast that with his methods."

"I don't wish to provoke you."

"Then don't," the snap of his brazen words held a warning, enough to rattle directly through Ayo's spine and prompt her to reflexively grasp the cylinder of her compressed spear hanging at her hip. His attention instantly flashed to her fingertips and back to Ayo's eyes. His posture tightened, as if for the first time in as long as they'd known each other, he found himself gauging just what she thought herself capable of.

What she saw in his eyes was so remarkably firm that she wondered if he planned to simply stay planted right where he was, even if she raised her spear against him?

This man seated on the grass a short distance away had never raised a hand, even so much as his voice against her, would she really consider initiating a feign, even a hair of violence against his will in order to try to draw out a fraction of the skills he hid from plain view?

Why did he have to be so unnecessarily stubborn?

She sought out words of logic and understanding yet again, doing what she could to keep her tone even, reasonable, "The only information we have is from what was shared with us by our King and a small number of closed-circuit recordings. But their contributions to our purpose are frightfully limited." She took a step closer to him, as if trying to bridge the space between them, "This topic of safety is not up for debate. It is far too important to ignore."

He set his jaw and rolled his shoulders back in pointed defiance, but his eyes fell on hers, hard, "Well, are you planning on ordering me then?"

If it was anyone else, his words and their intended meaning might have landed differently, but under the circumstances, they had a way of making her feel many things at once. They were a swift reminder that he was not one of her Dora Milaje, not a soldier that was hers to command simply because her duty required it of her. But the subtext beneath his words stung in a fresh and searing way that she hadn't expected them to. She would never, ever consider putting herself in a position to leverage the code words against him in order to force him to perform to her demands. The mere insinuation that he considered her capable of such dishonorable actions riled her nerves in new and evermore frustrating ways, and it made it increasingly difficult for her to keep her own manner in check.

She was certain her Lieutenants saw the muscles on the sides of her face momentarily falter with pent-up frustration. "No," Ayo managed to firmly respond through clenched teeth, "I was not planning on ordering you."

"Well that's a relief," The aggravating man sitting on the grass across from her responded, "Because I was hoping it wouldn't come to that. Especially when all of you have been so big on the idea of respecting consent."

Ayo felt her grip tighten on the cylinder of the spear in her hand. Swear to Bast, he–

But before the two of them could continue down a path that would have no doubt led to increasingly heated words, or perhaps a well-placed warning shot with her spear so he might better appreciate Ayo's own unsung capabilities, Yama casually took a few steps forward and addressed him by name, "And what if you are wrong, White Wolf?" she challenged. He and Ayo immediately swung their heads in her direction, but Yama simply met the intensity of their gazes with an offhanded shrug, as if she were merely attempting to diffuse a lovers' quarrel though logic alone.

Under any other circumstance, Ayo would have been quick to reprimand her charge, but she saw how her Lieutenant's words had an immediate effect on the man tucked away under a sheltering crown of leaves, "...What do you mean?"

While Ayo's hand gripped the cylinder of her spear, Yama's fingers danced around the outer edge of her water bottle, as if it was a talking stick, "What if you are wrong? What if there comes a time when, contrary to your will and those around you, we are forced to fight an opponent whose methods, style, and feigns remain foreign to us? What if he gravely injures, even kills one of us?" Her voice was calm, but it had a way of cutting through the tension laying heavy in the air between them, "It is not a pleasant thought. Not one any of us wish to dwell on, but it is a harsh reality we are politely speaking around. Would you not want us to have the best possible chance to defend ourselves? To protect Princess Shuri, King T'Challa, and others? Do you think it unreasonable that if we came to blows, we would not only wish to survive such an ordeal, but hope that we might know reliable ways to subdue our opponent without causing undo harm to him? Especially when he may wear the face of someone we care greatly for?"

The fight in his sky blue eyes faltered as even quiet Nomble stepped forward and softly added, "I would like to think I know you well enough to believe you would choose to face the discomfort of this conversation head on over the possibility of preventing putting further lives at risk unnecessarily, especially when all of us have witnessed the many snares your tormentors placed for you and any who might seek to undo their hard work." She leaned forward as she spoke, as if seeking to bridge the space between them, "We do not know how many more contingencies might be buried within your mind. We have not, will not shy away from facing them together with you. We only ask you to help us be suitably prepared."

It was rare to see Nomble be so forward and willing to speak her mind without being prompted for her thoughts. The strength and honesty of the declaration suited her, and it looked to not be wasted breath on the man sitting in the grass under the shifting bows of the trees high overhead. The intensity of his expression wavered and she caught him chewing his lip while he considered the merit of their collective words. Slowly, he lifted his hand and ran his fingers through his sweaty long brown hair, searching out the unseen flesh of his scalp. He didn't need to say what he was doing, for it was obvious he'd felt compelled to locate the pock-marks where the bitter heads of nails once marred his skull and drove electricity directly into his brain.

The scars left behind were echoes of requested intention. When Shuri finally completed the last of many surgeries needed to remove the nails and coax the brain matter, bone, and flesh back into place, it was James that had asked her not to make the surface 'like new' as she'd originally planned. "Doing that will just make it more confusing, like it never happened to begin with," he'd insisted. "Leaving scars behind will remind me it happened. That it was real. That it wasn't all in my head."

But as he sat in reflective silence with their words, letting his fingers search out the landmarks upon his flesh, White Wolf's manner shifted from a decided desire to permanently table Ayo's chosen topic, to a willingness to reflect on the uncomfortable reality surrounding them. "...I don't want anyone else to get hurt," he finally offered in surrender to the mountain air surrounding them.

At his admission, both of Ayo's Lieutenants glanced towards her, as if prompting her to continue where she'd left off, "It is a noble wish," she admitted, forcing her hand away from the cylinder of her spear as she stepped forward with quiet purpose, but without the desire to intimidate, "But that is why we train. It is not only good for the body and mind to stay fit and toned, but it allows us to sharpen our reflexes and ensure they serve us when they are called to action."

The heavy eyes that turned to meet hers knew her implication, for they'd spoken of it on many occasions. It was because of that candor between them, that bond, that she continued, "All of us hope for a future where you will be free at last from the pressure of the code words, but like the nails and electronics HYDRA forced upon you, their training has left scars in their wake. It is not a weakness to acknowledge them, because facing them will allow you to retrain your mind and body to respond in ways that suit your current purpose, not what was once theirs to command."

The long, weary look he cast her way was heavy with memory and words left unsaid. But he was listening. She wished they did not need to press this issue, but it was not a conversation that could wait until a more pleasant time. Not when so much was on the line.

Still, perhaps rather than continue to press him to be willing to take up arms against them, it would behoove them to better understand his history, including some of the parts that were not of someone else's making, "How long has it been since you sparred freely of your own desire?"

His tan face crinkled at the change in topic, but it was clear her question had gotten a foothold on something that didn't explicitly shut her out, some opportunity to build understanding between them, "...I dunno. Probably basic training? Camp McCoy? Before the War. Well. Before I shipped out to Europe in forty-three, I mean."

"Not again after that?"

The long, sweaty hair framing his face jostled as he shook his head and watched as Nomble and Yama sat, filling out the space to either side as if the four of them were a speaking circle, "Not really. After that it was mostly target practice. Munitions. They pegged me early on as sniper-material, so that was where a lot of my ongoing training was focused." He shrugged his shoulders lightly, and for just a moment, it was almost as if Ayo caught a whiff of the young man he once was. The one that had hoped to make a difference in the War by putting himself in harm's way. By learning to become a skillful marksman so he might better protect his friends and allies.

He leaned back a little, "After Azzano, I…." At his mention of the name, he abruptly frowned and cut himself off, dropping his eyes to the ground below. As he did, Ayo found herself acutely aware that she was the only figure still standing, so she chose to take a seat in the shade across from him, acknowledging this was a time for frank discussion between them. For pieces he'd long left unsaid. It was not that he lied, but there were many portions of his past he spoke around, as if they were too painful to face head-on unless Shuri's multipronged treatment coaxed it out of him. Forced the most private details of his life to be laid bare like broken shards of glass so he might step forward.

But a new thought came to her in that moment too. She'd once assumed that portions of his past were topics he rightly preferred not to dwell on, especially around others he'd only known for a period of months. People that were not friends of his independent choosing, but individuals who were conscripted to watch over him. But now she realized that since he'd broken with HYDRA, he hadn't had others to confide in at-length.

Because he'd been alone in the truest sense of the word.

The flare of anger she'd felt for the way he'd spoken up against her fell away as she was reminded that his actions were not meant to reflect upon how he respected Wakanda, or any of them. It was that he had been hurt so profoundly, so deeply that he could scarcely see the bottom of the riverbeds in his mind. That they remained murky, and what lay unexplored beneath rightfully scared him.

And Ayo knew it was not wrong to feel scared.

Ayo's voice was soft, personal, "You do not need to speak of what came after Azzano if you do not wish it. But it would help us understand why you were swiftly reminded of it when I asked about your desire to spar."

White Wolf chewed on his lip, and in that moment, it was as if she saw him as many people at once. There was the man before her, his brazen skin taking on the color of the Wakanan sun he now frequented, a stark contrast to the cold isolation he'd been forced to endure for so many years. But beneath the contours and fine lines of his face was the young man that had found himself fighting someone else's war on foreign lands.

Sometimes it was easy to forget he'd been nearly Yama's age when his life had been taken from him by force.

His words were slow in coming, but eventually they remerged, "...They would've known. That HYDRA'd done something to me, I mean. I didn't want 'em to know. I didn't want Steve or any of 'em to worry." He frowned, looking back at his hand as if he was ashamed for his admittance, for what he clearly believed to be a weakness in character.

"We cannot change the past, but it is not shameful to have felt scared. To wish those around you to not worry for you when you believe their attention should be focused elsewhere."

"Yeah," White Wolf breathed more than spoke as he kept his eyes downcast, "That's some of it. Winning the War and all that. But that makes it sound more selfless than it was. I didn't know just what poison kinda they'd shot me up with, other than it… changed me." He shook his head as he finally found the courage to lift his head and meet Ayo's gaze, "I knew they'd look at me differently. Steve especially." He snorted sadly, "'Course the irony isn't lost on me that since I didn't tell any of 'em something was up, they had no reason to go looking for me when I got blown off that train. I shouldn't've survived. Most days I wish I hadn't. Because then those assholes found me instead." His chest heaved as he spoke, as if it were increasingly difficult to balance when to breathe between such heavy, loaded words. Words, Ayo realized, he may have never spoken aloud until now.

Over the passing months, she'd put many of the broadest pieces together on her own, but this… this was the first time he'd chosen to be so painfully direct of his own accord, "Are you worried we will see you differently?"

The question got the smallest of sad smiles out of him, "Among other things, yeah. I guess so. But at the end of the day, this is preferable to the alternative."

"Which is what?"

His mouth bent into a tight cringe, "That instead of looking at me as some kinda broken, transplanted white foreigner, you look at me and see him. Or that one of you gets hurt," he squirmed his fingers together as if hoping they might ground him.

"You are not broken," Ayo insisted for not the first time. "We have sparred extensively with King T'Challa and helped him train," she reassured him, "We are not strangers to posing ourselves against those who are stronger than we are. As you know, our clothing is reinforced with vibranium weave, which makes it able to absorb the energy of even heavy blows."

Ayo didn't miss his flinch at her remark, but he quickly recovered and snorted lightly, shaking his head, "That's not what you're asking, though. What this is about. Any one of you could wipe the floor with me, with who I was back then, Nazi serum or not. Wouldn't'a mattered if I had both hands. I could throw a mean punch if I needed to, but… that's not who you're asking to tango with."

"You cannot go backwards, even though you so desperately wish for it, White Wolf." Ayo insisted, "You are no longer that man from before the War, but it does not mean you are simply a shade of the Winter Soldier either."

"I'm closer to that though," he pressed, but there was something heavier in his eyes, broaching that unspoken depth where he risked cutting himself off because he dared not dance any closer to the darkness, lest it risked swallowing him whole.

Yama's youthful voice carried over the mountain air between them, "It is up to you to determine who you wish to be." He frowned at that, but Yama continued, undeterred, "We are not blind. We see how jumpy you can be at times, how self-aware you are of your own strength and reflexes. There is wisdom in my Chief's observation that training is a way to seek to address and mold your instincts to suit you, rather than to simply suppress them and worry the past controls your actions now and always."

White Wolf didn't look convinced, but he chose not to argue.

"...My Chief…?" Nomble inquired, looking to Ayo. "Would it be permissible to share a few drops of the training Prince T'Challa went through when he first bore the strength of the Black Panther?"

It took Ayo a moment to realize what Nomble was getting at. The details and moderate embarrassment surrounding the story were not theirs to reveal, but she felt certain there was no harm in the little she felt compelled to share. "When one is new to remarkable strength, regular training is required to ensure that they suitably adapt to the new bounds of their body, both the remarkable extremes they are capable of, as well as tasks that require gentle finesse. With careful intention, and time-honored skill, we and those before us have ensured that those that bore the mantle of the Black Panther could train in safety."

"Much to the regrettable loss of many raw eggs," Yama noted mournfully.

Ayo sent her loose-lipped Lieutenant a glare of warning while White Wolf shook his head rapidly, his voice growing harder once again, "No. See that's the problem. You don't know what you're asking. None of you do."

"I only ask because it is necessary to ensure your safety and that of those around you," Ayo reminded him. He flinched at that, but Ayo got the distinct impression it wasn't a response to her words, but something private beneath the surface, "It will not change how we see you, if that remains a crux of your concern."

He sucked in a sharp breath of air, "I know that's what you'd like to think, but it's not true. It's also beside the point."

When Yama opened her mouth to object, the man facing Ayo drew his hand into a claw and lifted it palm up, as if inspecting it. The movement wasn't fast or intended to provoke or startle, but there was something decisive in the motion that gave Ayo pause. It held a greater context she was clearly missing. When he finally spoke, his voice was so quiet it was barely audible over the mountain breeze, "You were all there when I told Shuri that I think whatever they shot into me did something to my memory recall. Made it sharper, well, what they wanted me to remember when they weren't busy frying me from the inside out. Shuri called it a sort of 'eidetic memory' or photographic memory, but it's… more than that." He kept his eyes focused on his outstretched hand as he added, "The parts I can remember, it's not just what I saw, it's everything else. The sounds, smells, change in temperature. I have a sort of... uncomfortable hyper-awareness of how my body was balanced, oriented at all times." He swallowed before adding, "And this, this is the position my hand was in when I clenched it around the skull of a HYDRA agent that'd been sent after me in D.C." He readjusted his hand into a tight C-like configuration, "And this one? This was the shape it was in when Zemo stood by and idly watched as I snapped the neck of the last breathing member of the security deployment from the Joint Counter-Terrorist Centre back in Berlin. You see, Zemo hadn't thought to specify if it was optimal for his mission if they needed to remain alive, so the Soldier took the direct approach. The efficient approach."

"HYDRA did so much shit my head that I probably have more blank spots than actual memories, but what I do have is all kinds of clear, up to and including remembering the feel of each of 'em. The creak of bone right before it snapped and gave way." Ayo wasn't sure when he'd turned his attention to her, but his eyes were unwavering in their focus, "The idea of 'training' is well and good, but see that's the thing: You think you're asking for my help in being able to fight back against that, to maybe even train me out of some instincts I don't even know are hiding there, and a hundred more I'm damn well aware of. But you're not asking me to remember, not really. Because I already do. Thanks to HYDRA's bullshit, I might not remember all of the people I've killed, but I remember enough." He looked back at his hand, "And I could spend the next hour makin' shadow puppets with my hand telling you I didn't know even half the names of the people I killed, whether they were targets or just people that happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, but I can sure as hell remember the weight of the gun, or the crackle and snap of bone in my hand as I finished one job after the next without a second thought about anything other than the status of the mission they'd sent me on."

He swallowed again, and his sky blue eyes were glossy as he breathed more than spoke, "So yeah. That's where our training's different. They broke me. Twisted me. I may not act on it like I used to, like he used to, but there's a part of me they put there that automatically runs numbers to calculate just the right angle, the optimal amount of force needed to finish the job, or HYDRA's playbook of tips and tricks on various in-depth ways to torture someone to the point that death would be an honest-to-God mercy… And what you're asking without realizing what you're asking, is for me to try to remember what it was like to be like him, and to direct that at all of you." His hoarse, emotion-laden voice added, "I get that you're soldiers too. That you're trying to do your job. That you look at me and see a risk. But I don't want to be him. Not even if we're playing pretend."

Ayo hadn't realized she'd been holding her breath until there came a time her body forced her to heave in a gulp of air. She'd known pieces, but not… all of that. Not the raw truth. To know he was forced to recall such cruel and graphic details… And the eyes that looked back at her pleaded for her to understand, begged her to release him from this terrible topic, but it was not a consolation she could make. Too many lives rode on her decision, "I hear your words and the candor and pain in them, but there is too much at risk for all of us to stand idle and believe there may be no crocodiles laying in wait in the water simply because we don't see them now."

"Ayo, I won't fight you. Not like that," the fight in his eyes was still there, but it had been reframed as apology, a plea.

For not the first time in so many minutes, Ayo wished to Bast she could table this topic, but the coward's way out would only put lives at undue risk. She hoped that continuing to press this topic would not sour her relationship with the man facing her, but this was not a conversation that would grow easier, and with the deadline fast approaching them, it was a time for preparation, for action.

She could feel frustration growing in her belly as Nomble sought to intervene on his behalf, "Perhaps if we reframe the activity to something more palatable to start? Like the Guard's Dance?"

"That is a meritorious idea!" Yama quickly exclaimed. It took her Lieutenant only a moment to realize it would be appropriate to temper her youthful enthusiasm ahead of Ayo's blessing towards the decided change of topic. Even so, her warm brown eyes turned to Ayo, hopeful that the suggestion might offer them a path forward, "If it is deemed a desirable pursuit by our Chief, of course."

It was not a challenge that would pose the requisite amount of skill Ayo wished to pull forth from him and set against her and her Dora, but it was a starting point. One that he might not find wholly objectionable with proper encouragement. She inclined her head, "I would place value in that choice of training activity."

Some of the fight fell away from White Wolf's eyes as he turned his attention to the other Dora, not following what they were getting at. The curiosity in his expression was evident, fueled in no small part by Yama's chipper demeanor coupled with his endless desire to learn more about Wakanda, its people, and its ways. As of yet, he hadn't been permitted to step foot inside the Upanga Training Facility where the Dora Milaje trained, but it was clear to Ayo that a part of him wondered about their methods and what lay inside. He was never too forward, too pressing, but his latent curiosity about their ways remained, and her Lieutenants had now found a clever way to leverage that to their mutual advantage.

Yama used her hands to speak, "It is a game of sorts. A training activity. Instead of sparring against one another for dominance, one of our sisters is meant to pretend they are tasked with guarding someone acting as a precious quarry. The goal for the opposing individual or group is to try to claim the quarry for themselves, while the other seeks to prevent them."

"It is a game meant to sharpen instincts to protect others," Nomble clarified, "Not simply to subdue."

The man in front of her didn't look nearly so convinced, but Yama continued, "Come now, at least give it a try. You could begin as the Guarded. In that role, you do not need to do so much as raise a hand! Your goal is to simply stay behind your astute guarding Dora, and depending on your mood, make it easy or difficult for her to do her job."

"Yama often enjoys making it difficult on her guard," Nomble deadpanned.

"It is accurate to our lived experiences!" Yama defended, "Not all who we guard are wise or situationally aware."

Nomble rolled her eyes and was first to get to her feet. As she did, she extended a hand to White Wolf. He considered her outstretched palm for a moment but eventually sighed and grasped it, rising to meet her as Ayo and Yama did the same. He didn't look particularly happy about the game Nomble'd suggested, but the fact he was willing to indulge them as a willing participant was far better than… well… the possibility of provoking him to action by swift intention.

Perhaps it would not come to that. Ayo could only hope.

"What roles would you have for us, my Chief?" Nomble inquired. She tucked her water bottle among the tall grass and led White Wolf towards an open area of the grassy outcropping that was mercifully sheltered with the shade of branches high overhead. It was a good location, one that Ayo herself had scouted weeks earlier. There was sufficient space here to spar away from the high ledge they'd so recently climbed.

"Nomble will act as the lone adversary, and I will observe until I choose the role I shall play," Ayo stated evenly, thumbing the control of her spear so that only the staff extended, "We shall start with the blades retracted, and without use of the Sonic amplifiers." She turned to Yama, "You will be tasked with guarding our White Wolf."

Yama's smile widened at the role she'd been chosen to play, and she stepped into position between Nomble and where Nomble's quarry was standing as Ayo continued speaking, this time to the man behind her. "In your role, you are not meant to raise arms against Nomble. We shall set the win condition as her touching and end of her staff to your arm or legs."

"Like… tag?" White Wolf inquired, unimpressed, and clearly cautious there was an unsung aspect to the activity that might find distasteful.

Ayo could sense the nervousness beneath his words, and though she felt certain he was following the broad intent of the exercise, she was keenly aware he wasn't grasping that it was being simplified for his sake. This was not an activity to draw out the Soldier, but to acclimate him to being close to the fray so he could learn to better control his body and reflexes. Ayo and her Lieutenants clearly hoped he could learn how to participate, and in doing so see that the requests being made of him were tempered to ease him in. She hoped that in time, he might be more willing to show more of what he was truly capable of, and that each day, they could build on what they learned from the day before.

But then, perhaps it was unfair to expect him to be willing to show his teeth if she did not show hers first, "Like tag, yes, but perhaps first showing you how it is performed in earnest would be valuable before we seek your involvement in a milder sport meant only to acclimate you to the basics of the activity?"

He looked at Ayo in mild confusion before she continued, "For the first round, we will show White Wolf the advanced techniques we have developed so that he may see us as we are. As true Dora Milaje."

The grin on Yama's face spread ear-to ear. She was no-doubt eager for the opportunity to try and show off the many skills she normally hid from plain view, like her penchant for climbing. "You will want to step aside a bit, then," she politely gestured for White Wolf to step back towards the treeline and give them a wide berth.

Once he was a short distance away from their chosen sparring area, Ayo stepped closer to Nomble and Yama, "Yama will act as the Guarded. Nomble will guard her. I will act as Nomble's adversary, set on claiming the Guarded." She cast her attention to White Wolf, "You are only to observe. We will not seek to engage you."

White Wolf looked as if he still wasn't sure what to make of this, but he nodded acknowledgment.

Satisfied, Ayo tapped the shoe of her spear to the ground twice and modified the tip to produce the spear's tip. The motion prompted Nomble to extend her own spear and do the same. The fresh sight of the sharp blade carried a certain gravitas to their chosen activity, one that was meant to remind them of what they fought for, and that injuries were to be expected from such encounters, not because they were pleasant, but because it was important to build up stamina against them too. To learn to push through pain and master it so that if and when the time came to fight as if lives depended upon it, a Dora didn't risk cowering away at the sight of blood or injury, no matter if it was her own.

Nomble said nothing as she took up position between Ayo and Yama, but when her eyes glanced to the sight of the pointed spear, her Chief felt certain that for a moment she could read her Lieutenant's mind and hear her say, 'Ah, for real then.' Nomble raised the shaft of her spear and tapped the shoe of it twice against the Earth to let Ayo know she was ready.

Ayo felt the sear of the sun upon the top of her hands and bald head as she skillfully flourished the shaft of her sonic spear and felt the muscles of her body come alive to her beck and call. The heightened intensity she felt at the opportunity to engage in her full capabilities sent a thrill through her, especially since now, she could engage with her Lieutenants without fear of inadvertently spooking the man watching from the dappled shadows nearby.

She ground her feet into the rocky soil, pressing her awareness out around her, timing her breaths with the familiar rhythm of her heartbeats.

Only then did Ayo rush forward.

Nomble was ready, but as she angled her spear to block Ayo's swing, it was clear in the first clash of metal against metal that Nomble hadn't expected Ayo to put her full force behind the onslaught. Ayo might not have seen the moment of realization dawn in her Lieutenant's eyes, but she could feel it in the motion of her body as she pivoted and was forced to use the side of her staff to bodily sweep Yama away from Ayo's attempted follow-up blow, that carried with it the possibility of earning her an early victory by making contact with Yama's nearest foot.

Ayo thought she might've heard Yama curse under her breath at the unexpected action, but she pulled herself protectively behind Nomble, playing the role she was intended to without complaint.

This exercise was meant to be a song of carefully calculated motion, a dance. Even Yama's role as the Guarded was meant to be a challenge in unexpected ways. Hearts that were taught to wield weapons, to engage were tempered with awareness of their surroundings and how they might act in conjunction or in opposition to those who were tasked with guarding them.

There were lessons to be learned with strict trials to see who could fire or throw a spear with the most skill, distance, or precision. There were challenges of the mild and body, and times were it was imperative to task groups or individuals to take up arms against one-another so they could practice learning both the weaknesses of others as well as themselves. It was key to know when to leverage strength or agility. When to use their arms, bodies, and armor, or when it was apt to lean into working together as a cohesive group where they could summon the strength of many fighting as one.

But this exercise leaned into something that was far more integral to the purpose, and that was that they were soldiers of a sort, yes, but their fundamental purpose was to protect Wakanda and the royal family. That the decisions they made needed to come from a place where they would not shy away from willingly putting themselves in danger and taking blows, hardening their resolve through fire and fortitude until they were truly capable of making the ultimate sacrifice if it meant the ones they watched over were at once safe from harm.

Training could only do so much to harness such instincts. It could not reshape beliefs. But duty to Wakanda had to come first, always, and if a Dora Milaje was tasked with ensuring the safety of another, it didn't matter if she found their humor favorable or not: They had to be just as willing, just as resolute to give their all for their safety.

That was why Ayo did not hold back. It was what the moment called for, that White Wolf could see clearly that they were not feigning blows for his entertainment, but so he could bear witness to their private selves, and the trials that drew up enough force that if blows connected poorly, it could necessitate summoning a medical drone. But this was too important to strive for anything less than their best.

Ayo kept that intention in her heart as she danced to one side, deflecting one of Nomble's well-placed follow-up blows before smoothly spinning her spear and flourishing the tip of the weapon to Yama's feet in an attempt to draw her attention and upset her opponent's balance. The move was marginally effective, and the moment Nomble's eyeline went to the ground, Ayo pulled back her spear and swung it wide, attempting to strike Nomble's nearest knee

Her Lieutenant skillfully blocked the move using the bracers of one forearm, and nearly caught Ayo in the shoulder with the momentum of the retaliatory blow. It was quick and forceful, leveraging Nomble's preference towards short bursts of calculated motion… but it also left her open if Ayo calculated her timing just right.

Sweat trickled down Ayo's neck as she waited for the right moment. She was patient, and swing after swing, block after block, she prepared with practiced intention, being aware that her ultimate goal was not to spar with Nomble, but to touch Yama with her hands or spear. All the while, Yama remained alert and positioned safely behind her signature guard, her brown eyes seeking how to react to the battle waging a short distance in front of her.

As soon as Nomble widened her stance to ground herself in preparation for a coming swing from Ayo, the more experienced Chief of the Dora Milaje put weight into her left leg as an intentional feign whilst she spiraled her staff around the rings of her neck, making it appear as though she intended to pivot around Nomble and tag Yama's nearest shoulder.

That is not what happened.

The shaft of the staff swung around Ayo's neck, but part way through, she flung her elbow to reverse the direction and went low, so that her body moved around Nomble's left hip and the crest of her spear swung towards Yama's exposed leg.

But right before the flat of the weapon could connect, it struck hard against not Yama's armored shin… but a black strand of Kimoyo Beads encircling a tanned wrist.

Ayo wasn't sure how White Wolf had managed to intervene so smoothly, but she was certain he must have felt the force of the impact. If it bothered him, he didn't show it as he discreetly inserted himself behind Yama, effectively 'tapping in' for the defensive role Ayo'd originally suggested for him. Nomble breathed hard, perplexed as she lowered her spear, but Yama was not unaware that had it not been for White Wolf's choice to take the impact, the round would have completed the moment the flat of Ayo's spear struck Yama's shin.

"You might've saved me a fresh bruise," Yama acknowledged appreciatively with a quick bow of her head as she worked to catch her breath.

"You're welcome," White Wolf remarked to her before turning his attention to Ayo specifically, "I think I get the general gist of it," His tone was even, and Ayo found his posture willing rather than resistant as he planted his feet and waited while Yama took up position in front of him.

Yama's manner was pleasant as she turned to regard him, choosing to speak aloud a more tender topic, "I will guard you, White Wolf, but I will admit it is out of…" Ayo could see her Lieutenant choosing her words carefully, "...custom, for us to engage in this activity with one who is so recently recovering from an injury such as yourself." Yama's eyes briefly glanced towards Ayo, but when Ayo saw no need to stall the topic, Yama continued, "I would prefer we speak aloud of how you wish us to perceive it during this activity so it is to your taste."

In response, White Wolf made a self-conscious snort and ran his fingers over the crest of his left shoulder, "Are you asking if all of you ought to play with a handicap on account of me?"

Yama shook her head, her expression folding more personal rather than jovial, "Not exactly. By your manner, I did not think you believe yourself to have a significant handicap in your role as the Guarded."

"I don't," he confirmed before adding, "...but… so you want to know if you should play to that weakness? Because if this were the real deal, that's how this would play out?"

Nomble was quick to speak, "It is not meant to—"

White Wolf raised his hand and waved it in the air between them dismissively, "I'm not taking it the wrong way, Nomble. It's a fair question. Believe me. It's just that…" he frowned, chewing on his words as he gestured to his empty shoulder, "...This happened a long time ago, right? I know we've talked about it, but… I guess until just now I hadn't given a lot of thought to how that translates into training like this."

"Because you were not given the choice to view yourself as an amputee?" Ayo inquired.

White Wolf's face twisted at the term, but he didn't dismiss it, "I guess not? Even after the surgeries here in Wakanda… it's complicated," he admitted "The bulk of the time I was with HYDRA it was just… a non-issue. If anything, I…" he flinched lightly, "...I guess I considered it my stronger hand. He did, at least. And now… It's good it's gone. That Shuri pulled out all poisoned wiring and all that, but I… guess I'm still adjusting. And if we're being honest here? I haven't ever trained like this. I'm not necessarily against it, but the thought of it makes me uncomfortable. Just… not for the same reasons you're probably thinking."

Ayo shrugged her shoulders lightly, "I am less concerned of my perceptions of you, and more interested in how you perceive yourself."

White Wolf smiled lightly at that, "I know I've said it before, but as messed-up as it is, part of me's almost relieved. About the arm, I mean. Having two's certainly useful but… it's hard to explain. It's like that arm in particular was an accomplice to a lot of really awful, downright evil stuff. Like at the end of the day, it was tainted. Like it belonged to the Soldier, not me." He shrugged, "I suppose in some way, it feels good to put some added distance between all that and right now, you know?"

"It is," Ayo agreed, "And I maintain agreement with Shuri that seeking assistance from a suitable therapist would not be a wasted effort."

He made a face, "Maybe down the road. Not now."

"So stubborn," Yama mumbled, evidently pretending others could not hear her.

"A discussion for another time," Ayo noted, turning her attention back to White Wolf, "But you said the idea of training as you are makes you uncomfortable?"

He cringed, but didn't shut the conversation down, "It's not self-pity or anything like that, I just…"

Ayo let him still with his thoughts as he worked through him. She did not want to put words in his mouth or seek to explain his own feelings to him. It was up to him to search them out and breathe them aloud.

"I'm not worried about being vulnerable, I guess. It's not that. There were periods when I was on the run when the arm wasn't fully functional, I can deal with that, with contingencies. Adapt." His lips curled as if he was stifling bile, "I guess at the end of the day I just… beyond the stuff we already talked about, I keep coming back to the fact I just don't… can't… trust myself." His blue eyes lifted and met Ayo's with profound honesty, "That me being down an arm might run the risk of twisting the stuff they jammed inside of me and make things even worse. Like some sort of wounded animal overcompensating for an injury." He bit his lip before running his tongue over his chapped lips. As he did, Nomble took a few steps to the side to retrieve his water bottle and offer it to him.

"Thanks," he smiled appreciatively before unscrewing the cap and taking a long swig of the refreshing liquid before he continued, "Just… when I was on the run after HYDRA, I was doing what I could to not hurt anyone." He snorted lightly, "Managed it pretty well, too, all things considered. Especially since I was starting from square-one trying to sort out what I guess amounts to some sort of basic moral code in the absence of any handlers telling me what to believe."

"You had a code?" Nomble inquired.

"Something like one, I suppose. The broad strokes, at least."

For a moment, Ayo wasn't sure if he planned to continue, but he did so of his own volition, "I didn't have any qualms about taking down the folks HYDRA sent after me, or Steve, or even Sam, but I tried not to hurt anyone else. Not unless I needed to. Not unless I thought they deserved it."

Ayo found herself seeking clarity, "'Deserved it?'"

White Wolf squirmed a little at the question, but he didn't shut her out, "People hurting other people. Muggings. That sort of thing. I didn't really understand why people did stuff like that, but I didn't like it. And I stopped them when I could. So they wouldn't keep on hurting other people. Or animals."

"Like a vigilante?" Yama inquired, enthralled.

White Wolf barked out a laugh at that, "Hardly. It just seemed like the right thing to do, you know?" He adjusted his shoulders before he found his way back to what he meant to say, "Back in Bucharest, I was doing what I could to not kill anyone when that task force raided my place and went after me. I knew they weren't trying to necessarily take me alive, but I didn't want to have more blood on my hands, especially since I'd reclaimed a chunk of my mind by then." He snorted, "But then Zemo happened. Then that mess at the airport and Siberia, and… I keep hoping I'm past it, you know? That I'm on the other side of all that. Logically, I know I'm not. Not yet at least. And I'm not trying to sound unappreciative. I know you're looking at me like I'm some ticking time bomb and–"

Ayo swiftly cut him off, "That is not how I see you." Her voice was firm, direct, "I see a man who is afraid that he might hurt those around him without intending to, and I wish to give him – to give you – the opportunity to find your footing again. To find trust again in your own body and yourself. To face and hone instincts you worry are hidden in the shadows rather than cower before them."

She met his gaze, "It is valid to be mindful, even wary of how hardened instincts integrate into interactions we have with others, but you are not alone in these experiences. They are shared with countless soldiers spanning generations before us. But like them, even after the battles have passed, and in your case, even after, Bast willing, the code words that once controlled your mind are finally unmade, those instincts we speak of will remain to be dealt with. They are not predisposed to be instantaneously shucked out and discarded in the past. So those instincts cannot, should not, simply be ignored. Even with the best of intentions, you are doing yourself a disservice to think it is safer to stuff them in a box and hope they fade away on their own, rather than work to gain further knowledge and control over them, around those that are your compassionate peers. Peers that have had to navigate such trials regularly, especially in the wake of the Battle of Mount Bashenga."

At the mention of the recent conflict's name, White Wolf's eyes glanced first at Nomble, and then Yama, as if he was in some way freshly reminded that though the manner of their own trials were different from the demons he danced with, they were not without struggles of their own.

Even if normally a Dora would not speak widely of such personal matters.

"The mind and body are intrinsically linked," Ayo observed, "It is not cowardice to be scared of putting intention into practice, but it is foolish to believe peace will find you simply if you stand still and ignore that which causes you discontent, especially," she emphasized, "especially if you find yourself surrounded by others who come from similar places of understanding and wish to help you." Ayo lifted her hand so it was face-up to the blue sky above them, "You are worried we will see you differently, and what we see, we will find distasteful. What you are not allowing yourself to realize is that what we are offering here is to see more of ourselves too. Complicated parts usually kept to our sisters, out of public view. I do not make this proposal lightly, or without extensive consideration for all involved. I truly believe it is what we must do to move forward, for you to move forward. But you are not alone for these trials. We intend to weather them with you. As allies. As peers. As friends."

Ayo could tell by his breathing that her words had struck something in him that resonated, and she could feel a shift in the air as he regarded the women around him anew. It was not as if he hadn't looked to them with respect before, but up until this fragile moment, Ayo wondered if he'd ever stopped to consider that they each had their own trials and warrior's instincts they needed to be mindful of too. She felt as if he finally grasped why this exercise was necessary, why he needed to find the strength to be willing to look into the reflection pool inside himself so that he could take the reins of his instincts, but so those around him could help him in ways he could not help himself.

"I don't want to hurt any of you," he repeated for not the first time, but his tone was no longer one of outright resistance.

"Injuries are an expected part of our training," Ayo reasoned, "And our technologies allow us to recover with remarkable expediency."

"The vibranium weave is a suitable boon as well," Yama saw fit to helpfully add, watching as White Wolf placed his water bottle back among the grass a distance away where no one would trip over it. Yama extended her spear, retracting the blade as Ayo did the same. They would begin this exercise with the artistry of staves alone.

"Can I make a request then?" White Wolf asked, and when no one objected, he continued, "I'm guessing some of the training you're hoping to build towards might be similar to at least some of the early stuff I went through way back. Can we… start out with some kind of baseline agreement not to try and go for the throat right out the gate? I'm not questioning your skill, I'd just prefer to ease back into the fray before we start down the path of anyone asking to compare and contrast things to… him?" His voice grew softer as he said the quiet part out loud, "I'm just worried if any of you feigned you were aiming for a killing blow, I…" he trailed off.

Ayo inclined her head in full agreement, "We will let you set the pace."

A faint smile found its way back to his face as he remembered something and turned his attention specifically to Nomble, "You know, your brother's gonna get a kick out of this by the way. Here he was, giving me guff about being more interested in learning about the Dora Milaje than the King's Guard, and lo' and behold…"

"We are not training you to be a Dora Milaje," Ayo felt it prudent to clarify.

"He doesn't need to know that."

Yama snorted.

"You are only going to encourage him further," Nomble bemoaned. "M'Bahi has already sought to teach anyone who will hear him of that ridiculous name he hopes others will adopt for you instead."

Ayo cocked her head at that, not following, "What name?"

Her Lieutenant's manner flustered, but Yama's smile only grew as Nomble half muttered, visibly embarrassed, "...Ingcuka Emnyama."

"Black Wolf?" Ayo raised an eyebrow.

Nomble held up her hands in feigned surrender, "I am not responsible for my brother's poor humor!"

"As I recall, he was quite concerned we were playing to regrettable stereotypes concerning color as it relates to race," Yama deliberated aloud.

"'White Wolf's' just fine," the man in question insisted before the conversation could spiral any further into oblivion, "Were all of you wanting to keep standing around talking, or did you want to get this show on the road?" Ayo was relieved to hear a spot of humor return to his voice as he stepped back into position behind Yama.

The boldfaced grin on her Lieutenant's face only brightened as she flourished her staff and boldly declared, "I will guard our White Wolf. Which of you are brave enough to face me first?"

Ayo found herself smiling as she stepped back so Nomble could take up arms as the next lone adversary in their challenge. First Ayo, and then her Lieutenants tapped the shoes of their staves into the ground twice before they fell into formation and the Guard's next dance commenced.


Battling out across the grassy sprawl before her, Ayo watched as Nomble continued to press harder to find weakness in Yama's form. With encouragement, the pace between them increased as they fell into a rhythm that tuned their attention to the present and away from greater worries. Initially, Ayo knew her Lieutenants were not playing to their strengths, but were instead trying to put on a performance of sorts as they settled into having White Wolf within striking distance of their weapons. It was obvious to Ayo that they were tempering their blows, until the moment that White Wolf told Nomble she was free to treat his left side as his weaker side, and that she should use it to her advantage.

He may have added in crisp Wakandan that it was Yama's weaker side too.

At the remark, the intensity of Nomble's focus grew in earnestness, though Ayo did not miss that her eyes continued to seek out White Wolf's own, as if she remained concerned she might inadvertently provoke alarm in his hidden instincts.

But that wasn't what Ayo saw in his eyes.

He watched the motion of the women in front of him carefully, playing the part of a spritely, meek gazelle well, but his eyes were bright and alive, aware of the clash of movement within feet, sometimes within mere inches of him. Ayo was not certain the last time he'd been willingly placed in a position of vulnerability, but she watched as initially, he felt compelled to raise his arm to protect himself from calculated blows Nomble sought to land and Yama expertly blocked. But as time went on and he got a feel for what it was like to think on his feet in such a role, Ayo could see how his trained eyes grew in confidence as he tracked the movements of the two women in front of him, learning to trust the strengths of Yama's guard, while also calculating the moments when it risked faltering and required him to rapidly adjust his own footing and balance.

His watch was not simply in regard to his own safety or desire to not be the source of a premature victory, but Ayo soon realized he was actually searching for ways to bait Nomble without being overt about it. To encourage her into movements which Yama could meet with the full strength of her guard.

It was a very specific skill, one that Ayo rarely saw in someone so new to such activities. Usually, recruits acting as the Guarded naturally shied away from the noise and flourish of motion nearby. They inadvertently bumped into the one guarding them, or made it harder on them to accomplish their task. They protected their faces out of instinct, their fingers for fear of being hit.

But not White Wolf.

Ayo didn't yet see the Soldier he so feared. What she saw in his focused eyes, in the motion of his body, was a cultivated skill of those who fell into guarding with the grace that some merely breathe.

His natural instinct was to protect.

She had seen it in their climb earlier, as he discreetly positioned his shoulder beneath Nomble's foot, preparing to take her weight if her fingers faltered, and Ayo saw it again now as he moved in harmony with Yama, fluidly supporting her guard.

When he chose to grant Nomble permission to leverage his injured side in their dance, his adversary sought out new and increasingly creative ways to play it to her own advantage. While her Lieutenant was certainly capable, the choice added new complexity to the game, and forced White Wolf and Yama to be especially cognizant of when Nomble went after that weaker side. On one particularly close call, Yama had to take a strike to the pauldron of her shoulder to ensure Nomble didn't declare a victory over Yama by tapping her staff to the boot of the man who'd briefly lost his balance behind her.

Ayo circled them, the motion of her stalking form adding additional distractions to the three figures vying for dominance nearby. As she strode beside her vibranium staff, she tapped it to the ground twice for attention, "I will choose to join the cause of the adversary or the guarding shortly. Be ready when I do."

This was not a new exercise to either of her experienced Dora, but she wanted to ensure White Wolf knew what possibilities lay ahead. In practice with a larger training group, it was common practice to substitute individuals in and out, to increase and decrease numbers on any of the three roles dynamically so that no roles grew stale. Weapons and armor were added, removed, reminding even the most experienced Dora never to rely too much on accouterments over trusting the power of her own mind and body.

Ayo improvised as she circled them, "What are the weaknesses your skilled eyes see, White Wolf? Besides your astute observation that Yama's left side is her weaker side?"

Nomble briefly glanced over one shoulder, surprised that Ayo was seeking conversation during such a remarkably strenuous activity. Not to be deterred, Yama took the opportunity to sweep at her feet, momentarily putting her aggressor off-balance. Behind her, White Wolf did his best to think on his feet and kept in position behind Yama.

"I would have you be direct."

"Well, Nomble–" He began, but that was as far as he got, because one moment Nomble was attempting to break through Yama's guard to tag him, and the next, Ayo had joined Nomble's cause.

There was a spark in the air as Ayo flourished her staff in formation with Nomble, and Yama realized her Chief's intention was to add complication and urgency to their exercise. It had an immediate effect, and Ayo could see Yama come into herself, and push herself increasingly harder against the united front that sought to topple her guard.

Now that she was facing two Doras, her focus over her Guarded would be diminished, and she would need to balance her attention, especially as physical exhaustion began to set in and take root.

As vibranium struck vibranium, Ayo repeated, "What are the weaknesses your skilled eyes see, White Wolf?"

The man in question was briefly forced to the ground to avoid the shoe of Yama's defensive staff, "Nomble's calculating, but she has a bit of a tell with how she preemptively locks her shoulders before she shifts her weight for a feign."

Yama breathed hard, pivoting heavy rapid-fire blows from each of her aggressors while the man behind her grunted and did his best to answer Ayo's question amid the sprawl of four moving bodies and three staves, "There's only so much I can see from behind Yama, but I think sometimes she might be overcompensating for the amount of force she's using to block blows."

"And me?" Ayo pressed.

And as he opened his mouth to speak, many things happened at once.

The heartbeat of Ayo's staff fell into place between the crack of vibranium striking vibranium weave. Yama flinched as a new bruise was borne across the top of her thigh from a well-placed blow by Nomble, and Ayo saw her opening and went for it.

The motion of her body was fluid and precise, and with practiced precision, she moved to flank Yama so she could place a follow-up strike upon her and push her further off-balance so Ayo could then tap White Wolf in the boot with her staff. Ayo locked eyes with, hoping to distract him from pivoting to Yama's far side, but instead, she caught a moment of wildness in White Wolf's own eyes. The flashed brightly as he caught Yama's brief yelp when Nomble's follow-up blow impacted her body.

In that moment, something shifted in the man in front of her.

It was subtle more than fierce. Instinct more than reason. But as Ayo spun her staff to strike at Yama and clear guard so she could claim victory in the exercise, White Wolf managed to twist and catapult himself protectively in front of Yama, smoothly catching the tip of Ayo's staff in his hand. He shoved it back with such quick motion and remarkable force that it sent her flying backwards.

And then there was blackness.


[Full Image, Close Up, Early Sketch, and Time-lapse of Chapter Art, featuring an illustration of Bucky with long hair standing amid a forest and looking past the view with a warm smile, by me (KLeCrone)]

This chapter also offered me the opportunity to create an accompanying illustration featuring "Bucky with the good hair." ;)

I really appreciate being able to weave some of my own art and illustrations into this story when the right moment presents itself, and this story beat, like the one with Ayo renewing her pledge from Chapter 50, was one of those moments that it felt rewarding to try and capture with both prose and paint.

Initially, I considered sketching him touching the scars of where the nails once were along his scalp, but as I continued working, I decided to chase something more warm and cozy.

I've included a timelapse of this painting as well!

For Chapter 61, I created an accompanying illustration featuring "Bucky with the good hair." ;) Please check out this chapter on Archive of Our Own to see the art!

Simply search for: "KLeCrone Ao3 Winter of the White Wolf"


Author's Remarks:

I hope this update finds you well! This particular flashback covers a lot, and it felt wonderful to step into these events from Ayo's point-of-view.

A nugget of this particular chapter is credit to laukyra (from Ao3) mentioning they were curious to hear more about "Ayo and Bucky training scenes from 2016-2018." And, whelp! I hope this fits the bill. ;)

- White Wolf - I wanted to dive into the transitory period when he started to go by this name, and I loved the idea that its humble origins were… literally the children you see in the after-credits scene in Black Panther, and that everyone just started using it too.

- Yama and the Goats - I love the idea that Yama probably gave one (or more) of the goats matching bandanas to coordinate with Bucky's shawls. Because Yama.

- Yama and the Hairband - I had a short period where I was unable to use one of my hands properly, and so there's been a part of me that acknowledges that Bucky probably needed a bit of help to tie his hair back… but that he would have let others, like Yama's sister, indulge in their interest in more complicated braids on occasion. ;)

- T'Challa and the Eggs - Please enjoy the mental image of then Prince T'Challa trying to learn his own strength by picking up eggs and… failing repeatedly… while Dora Milaje watched and struggled not to smile at the ridiculousness of the sight.

- Bucky Not Wanting to Play Pretend - Not only does this track for me, but it explains why Ayo was especially horrified he would be willing to later do this at Zemo's request years later.

- Bucky's Memory Recall - There's 'Photographic Memory,' and then there's whatever this poor man has... :(

- Bucky Politely Declining Therapy - This shouldn't be a surprise after what we saw in TFATWS, but I'd like to think he intended to consider therapy somewhere down the road, but just never felt inclined to make that first appointment.

- Barnes the Vigilante - It may not have been a common thing, but I'm sure it absolutely happened over the years.

- Bucky and the Dora Milaje - In my head-canon, was Bucky trained as a Dora Milaje? Nah. Did he pick up some of their moves from exercises like this, which culminated in skills like being able to hurl that pipe with utter precision in Madripoor during the events of TFATWS? Absolutely.

As always, thank you for sharing all your wonderful comments, questions, and words of encouragement on this story. Knowing that others out there are following alongside me on this marathon of a story truly helps keep me fueled to keep on writing, especially on these longer chapters which take a *lot* of time to write and edit. I can't wait to share what's around the next bend…!