I woke up on Saturday morning with a smile on my face. Finally, after over a month of desperate attempts to earn Severus' trust, he let me in. I didn't just win his trust, though. The way he kissed me last night confirmed it: I have won his heart. If I am being honest with myself, he won my heart the second he said my name.
I climbed out of bed and walked to my fireplace. I couldn't feel him; he must be at breakfast. I usually skip breakfast on a Saturday, but if he is there, I will be too. I met up with Tas in the common room and hurried down to breakfast. "What's got you so chipper?" She asked as we entered the Great Hall. I didn't realise I had been grinning the whole way here. I locked eyes with Severus at the staff table immediately. "I'm just so happy to be able to walk again." I laughed.
"Me too; I've been so lonely without you. Do you want to go to the Three Broomsticks for lunch?" I almost didn't hear Tas over the thumping of my heart. "A butterbeer is exactly what I need right now." I smiled as we took our usual seats. Not close enough to Severus as I would have liked, but I have missed Tas too.
"Good morning, Hazel." I had to bite down on the inside of my cheek to suppress a grin. I will never get tired of hearing his voice. "Good morning, Sev." I took a sip of pumpkin juice to try to cool down my flushed cheeks. "I didn't expect to see you here this morning." It sounded as though that was exactly what he expected. "I couldn't feel you, so I guessed you'd be here." I started buttering some toast. Having only eaten once in three days, my stomach is screaming at me. "I thought as much." I didn't need to look at him to know he was smirking.
"You're going to Hogsmeade with Miss Rosewood?" Was he jealous? "I am. We have seen very little of each other this year. Unfortunately, someone else has been taking up quite a lot of my time." I was baiting him, but I really did feel awful that I had drifted from Tas, however unintentional it might have been. "You didn't seem to think it was unfortunate when you mounted my lap yesterday." He quipped. I had to bite my cheeks to suppress a whimper.
"Touché." I sat up straighter, trying to compose myself. "Have fun. It is important to maintain normalcy. You were bonded with Miss Rosewood long before you were with me." I almost teared up at his respect for my life away from him. "Thank you. You can call her Taslyn; no one can hear you." Even though I couldn't tell Tas about my relationship with Severus, that doesn't mean she and I don't come as a package deal.
"She has not offered her name to me as you have." I laughed softly, which earnt a quizzical look from Tas. "What's funny?" Shit. "Language." This is torture. "Just thinking how this time yesterday I was about to die, and now it's like it never happened." Lying is my native tongue. She laughed, nudging me in the arm. "Hardly funny, but it is quite strange." She was confused as to how quickly I recovered, but thankfully chose not to comment.
The October snow was well and truly upon us. I cast a warming charm on Tas and me as we trekked arm-in-arm through the frozen roads to Hogsmeade. When we entered the Three Broomsticks, I sent Tas to find our regular booth towards the back of the pub while I ordered us a butterbeer each. I had just paid for our drinks when I felt the minds of the Golden Trio step inside. Harry was looking for Slughorn; Hermione's mind was riddled with Ron, and he was as clueless as ever.
I smiled at the three of them as I took my butterbeers from Madam Rosmerta. "Hi guys, I trust your sixth year is treating you well so far." As a fellow academic, I have always had a pleasant relationship with Hermione. Harry and Ron, however, didn't pay much attention to me. I was a Slytherin, after all. "Hi, Hazel. We have, thank you. Congratulations on making Head Girl; you deserve it." Hermione is always so sweet. She never says anything she doesn't believe. Harry nodded and smiled, and Ron walked off to find them a table.
"Thank you, Hermione. I will not be surprised if you are elected Head Girl next year." I winked as I passed by. Though I meant what I said, I can't help but feel guilty. Who knows what will become of the school when Albus dies? One thing is certain, though: it will be chaos. As I sat down across from Tas, I saw Draco enter and head straight for the bathroom. Even over the noise of the buzzing pub, I could feel him. He was incredibly anxious; I could feel myself start to sweat, just as I am sure he is. I knew he was up to something, and I knew it had something to do with his task. I felt helpless, not being able to confront him.
"What's wrong?" Tas might not be able to read minds, but she is very good at reading body language. "I'm worried about Draco. He seems stressed out this year." I played the half-truth game. "I have noticed he is a bit skittish, too." She could definitely learn to cast Legilimens; she would pick it up in no time. "I'll check on him later." I needed to change the topic. "You'll never guess who Snape and I caught snogging a few weeks ago." I told Tas all about Pansy and Blaise and how hilariously mortifying it would have been for them.
As we were laughing about how many times we have caught Crabbe and Goyle sneaking into the kitchen, Slughorn approached our booth. "Good afternoon, Miss Goldstein. It's so lovely to see you. And hello to you too, Miss Ringwood." He's definitely had one too many butterbeers. "It's Rosewood, you twat." I laughed softly as Tas rolled her eyes. "Good afternoon, Professor. How are you?" I really don't mind Slughorn, but he does seem like a bit of a twat, as Tas put it.
"I'm quite alright, thank you. I wanted to extend an invitation to a supper party that I throw for a select few students." I saw an image of Uncle Newt flash across his eyes. I'm guessing the "select few students" are all those with connections to well-known wizards and witches. "Of course, sir. I would be delighted." I bit my cheek and forced a smile. I didn't want to be involved, but I heard him invite Harry and Hermione earlier. Given what I know about the fate of Dumbledore, I wouldn't mind getting to know Harry a little better.
"You would be delighted?" Tas mocked me as Slughorn stumbled away. "I have to see him every day. I didn't want to be rude." Of course I wasn't delighted. "Fair enough. Come on, let's go." We walked arm-in-arm once more back towards the castle. We were trailing behind Harry, Ron, and Hermione when we heard a bloodcurdling scream. Leanne, a Gryffindor and fellow seventh year, was standing over Katie Bell. She was being dragged around like a ragdoll and thrown into the air. It was truly horrifying.
Tas and I caught up to the Golden Trio as Harry knelt down to inspect an unravelled package. "I wouldn't touch that, Harry." I instructed over his shoulder. The necklace that had fallen out of the package was definitely cursed. As we huddled around Katie's twitching body, Hagrid came up behind us. Like me, he warned us all not to touch the necklace before scooping Katie up and carrying her away to the castle.
As we stomped through the thick snow and swirling winds, I took the liberty to cast a warming spell over all six of us. Everyone's minds were racing. Leanne was crying; Hermione was trying to figure out what curse was placed on the necklace; Ron was thinking about Hermione snogging him; and Harry was thinking about Draco. "I saw him enter the bathroom. He hexed her." My heart was hammering in my chest. I knew Draco was up to something, but I didn't think he would risk somebody else's safety. Severus needs to tell him to be more careful.
As we approached the entrance courtyard, I told Tas to go back to the common room. I needed to speak to Severus. I followed behind Leanne, Harry, Ron, and Hermione as they made their way to meet McGonagall. I stood at the back of the classroom as Leanne explained how Katie obtained the package in the bathroom and how she intended to give it to Dumbledore. I felt sorry for her; she was still so shaken from witnessing her friend get cursed.
Just as McGonagall was scolding the Golden Trio for being involved in yet another scandal, I felt Severus approaching. As he walked through the doors, he glanced briefly at me. "What are you doing here?" He sneered as he strode up to meet McGonagall. "I was with them when Katie got cursed." I watched as he inspected the necklace. "It was Draco, wasn't it?" I asked him, trying to keep my lip from trembling. "It was Malfoy." Harry's words made bile creep up my throat. Being the chosen one has really gone to his head.
I was about to shut him down when Severus cut me off. "Don't." He was as angry as me. "Meet me in my room when you're done." I couldn't listen to this anymore, so I slipped out and hurried to my room. It is torture knowing what I know and not being able to do anything about it.
I paced in front of my fireplace for what felt like hours until it finally erupted, and Severus stepped out. I wrapped my arms around his waist before the flames had a chance to return to normal. "It was him, wasn't it?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer. "Yes." He stroked my back, calming my ragged breaths. He led me to the loveseat, and I draped my legs over his. "I feel so helpless, Sev. Draco is suffering." He started to slowly rub my legs, just as he did last night.
"He will be fine, Hazel." He pulled me onto his lap, and I shifted to straddle him. The memory of last night danced across my eyes. "Every time we are alone like this, it is under less-than-ideal circumstances." I leant my forehead against his and sighed. "So far." He raised his hands to cup my cheeks, lifting my face to look at him. "It won't be easy." He pulled me forwards and placed his lips against mine. I will never get tired of the magic that flows through us when we kiss.
Before I could let myself get caught up in the feeling of his body pressed against mine, I pulled back. "I have Slughorn's dinner party tonight." He dropped his hands to my waist, rubbing slow circles over my sweater. "I should have known he would ask you to attend. His obsession with fame is nauseating." I laughed, placed one more quick kiss on his lips, and climbed off of his lap.
"I have to find something to wear." I started rifling through my wardrobe. Pulling out a black dress that I have not had the chance to wear yet, I smiled. "Perfect." It is a silk slip dress, falling just above my ankles, with a slit that landed half way up my thigh. I tossed it on my bed, pulled my sweater off and started unbuttoning my jeans. "So, you're not going to tell me to turn around this time?" I jumped and clutched my chest before realising he has seen me in this state multiple times before.
"It's not the first time you have seen me half naked, Sev." I laughed as I kicked off my shoes and jeans. He stood and approached me, looking like a predator stalking his prey. My core throbbed at the hunger in his eyes. "I haven't had the chance to savour the sight, though." I whimpered as he towered over me. With a smirk, he leant down, kissed me softly, and took a step back. I trembled as he let his eyes wander over every curve.
"Put the dress on." His order made my knees weak. Without breaking eye contact, I stepped into the dress slowly. As it got caught slightly over the curve of my ass, he groaned. I was tempted to let the dress fall to the floor again, but I get the impression he wouldn't like that I disobeyed his order. As I pulled the last strap up to my shoulder, I blushed. The silk clung to every curve perfectly, and I could tell he thought so too.
"What do you think?" I slowly spun around, allowing him to take it all in. "Like you said, it's perfect." I grinned at his compliment. He stepped towards me, cupped my cheeks, and pulled my lips to his; he was hungry. I gasped when he slipped his tongue in to meet mine, and he instantly dropped his hands to my thighs and lifted me. As I wrapped my legs around his waist, he gripped my ass and squeezed tightly. I moaned; the feeling of his tongue in my mouth and his hands on my body was an ecstasy I didn't know existed.
My core was aching for more. I needed his hands to roam every inch of my body while his lips followed. His tongue dominated mine, and I gladly let it. I threaded my fingers through his hair and tugged, earning me a low growl. "I need you to promise me something, Hazel." I whimpered as he dragged my swollen bottom lip through his teeth and pulled away. His eyes were piercing into mine, and I felt a familiar wave of anxiety wash over him. He set me down, keeping his hands on my waist.
"Anything." I frowned. He always gets me so high and then makes me feel as though he is going to run away. I have never been so sexually frustrated in my life. "We both know that without our bond, I would be the last person you would choose to have in your room on a Saturday afternoon." There was that guilt again. I didn't feel that way, but I admit that he is right. Without our bond, I doubt I would be mounting him every chance I got.
He dropped his hands from my waist and took a step back. "You must swear to me that if at any point you become uncomfortable, you will tell me." I took a step towards him, reached out my hand, and entwined my pinkie with his. "If you haven't noticed, it has been me who has initiated all of our rendezvous so far." I laughed. "But yes, I promise." He simply nodded and squeezed my pinkie lightly. "You need to promise me the same, Sev." He frowned. "You have more to lose than me. You must also tell me if you become uncomfortable. This is a two-way street."
I turned back to my wardrobe and pulled out my bathrobe. "You are extraordinarily mature for your age." I hear that a lot. "A perk of growing up hearing more adult thoughts than my own." I smiled. "I need to shower. You're welcome to stay and have a firewhiskey while I get ready." He smirked. "As much as I would love to, I need to update Albus." Of course. He came here straight away. "Have fun. I will see you later." He kissed my cheek, and I watched him leave.
When I arrived at Slughorn's supper party, I was relieved to see an empty seat next to Hermione. "Hi guys. Have I missed much?" I whispered to Harry and Hermione. I wasn't late, but everyone was already seated when I walked in. "No, but Slughorn will probably interrogate you next." Hermione laughed softly. I glanced around the room, taking note of who else Slughorn prized over all other students. Augustus was sitting next to Slughorn. I should have suspected he would be here. He frequently brags about his father being a senior in the Department of Magical Games and Sports. Slughorn loves Quidditch.
"Excellent. Now I have an excuse to get close to her." Augustus' infatuation with me is getting exhausting. As I rolled my eyes, a wave of contempt and confusion washed over Harry. "What was Snape doing in her room today?" I snapped my eyes to his and quickly looked down at my plate. How in Merlin's name did he know Severus was in my room?
"Hazel, thank you for joining us! How is your uncle doing?" Slughorn addressed me, snapping me out of my thoughts. "He is doing just fine, Professor. Thank you." I forced a smile and clenched my fists beneath the table. I was starting to sweat. "Marvellous. Hazel's uncle is Newt Scamander, the famous author of 'Magical Beasts and Where to Find Them'. I unfortunately didn't have the chance to teach him, but I have been told he was enamoured by magical creatures even as a boy."
I shuddered when I heard everyone's minds working in overdrive. Other than Tas, no one knows that Newt is my uncle. "I didn't know that, Hazel!" Hermione was thrilled at the news but also annoyed that I hadn't told her sooner. "It wasn't a secret, but I just preferred people not associate my grades with nepotism." Not a complete lie.
I couldn't focus on anything other than Harry's swirling thoughts for the rest of the night. Other than when Ginny Weasley walked in, his mind was fixated on Severus and me. "She's the Head Girl. Maybe they had a meeting. No, Snape would never go into a student's private bedroom, especially if that student was a girl." My heart was hammering in my chest. "I need to ask her what he was doing there." I wanted to excuse myself, but I needed to stay and figure out how he knew Severus was in my room.
After thirty minutes of spiralling thoughts, I caught something that made no sense. "I know what I saw. Remus and Sirius said the map never lies." What map? And what do Professor Lupin and Sirius Black have to do with it? I feel like I'm about to be sick. "I think I will skip dessert, Professor. I am feeling rather unwell. Thank you for a lovely evening." I forced another smile and hurried out before Slughorn had the chance to protest.
I took my heels off and ran straight to Severus' office. As soon as I reached his door, it swung open. "Harry knows." I was panting. He grabbed me by the arm, pulled me in, and locked the door. He waved his hand and cast muffliato. "Knows what?" He led me to his desk and sat me down opposite him. "He knows you were in my room today." He frowned, and his lips parted. "I don't know how. He said he has a map that doesn't lie." I still haven't steadied my breathing, and I was even more sweaty.
Severus conjured a glass of water and handed it to me. "Thank you." I finished the glass in one big gulp. "I know he is going to confront me about it. What do I say?" He was even more panicked than I was. "Do you know what map he is talking about?" He shook his head, still unable to speak. I was getting frustrated at his lack of support. "He said something about Professor Lupin and Sirius Black." He stood up so abruptly that I jumped. "Even from the grave, Black is a menace." He started pacing behind his desk. What does he have against Harry's godfather?
"Sev, please tell me what to do." My voice began to tremble. He leant over his desk and hung his head. When he didn't respond, I became impatient. "Fine, I will come up with something on my own." I got up and walked to his fireplace. "It's probably best you don't come to my room until I figure this out." If he wasn't going to even look at me, I wasn't going to wait for permission to floo from his office. "Good night, Severus."
This game of hot and cold is exhausting. Every day feels like a battle. He said it wouldn't be easy, but this is impossible. Once again, he has left me stranded. I was furious with Severus, worried about Draco, and scared for Albus, and now I am stressed about Harry and his bloody map. I am positive Harry will try to talk to me. I need to figure out how I am going to explain why Severus was in my room. He thought that we might have been having a meeting. I could use that excuse. Maybe I will tell him I asked Severus to change my password. I can't tell him I have a crush on him like I said to Draco. Harry would certainly not keep that a secret.
I could feel the anxiety rising up through my veins. I could not have another panic attack because I knew Severus would come to the rescue again. I don't want to see him right now, and I also knew that Harry might catch us again. I ran to my bedside table and shot a vial of Calming Draught as if it were firewhiskey. I sighed as I felt the panic leave my body. I can overthink all of this tomorrow, but right now, I need to sleep.