I knew I couldn't avoid Harry forever. The Golden Trio would be at breakfast this morning, so I decided to make myself as available for him as possible. Without appearing as such, of course. As I stepped into the Great Hall, I felt Severus' eyes on me. I purposely didn't meet his gaze; he needs to know I am still upset with him. As Tas was still asleep, I was able to sit by myself and calm my nerves. I'm still not sure what I am going to say to Harry, but I am better at lying under pressure anyway.
"Are you alright?" His concern flooded my body. I fought with my anger at him and how powerless I am when his voice rings in my head. "You don't get to ask me that." I blinked the tears away and cleared my throat. "I'm sorry for –"
"You had the chance to be concerned last night, Severus. But you left me. Again." I swiftly cut him off; I couldn't hear his apologies now. He felt ashamed by his actions, which didn't make me feel any better. "You should feel guilty. I will talk to Harry and sort this mess out."
As I was about to stand up to leave, Harry appeared behind me. "Hi, Hazel. How are you feeling?" He was forcing a smile and attempting small talk. It made me cringe. "Morning, Harry. I'm better now, thank you." I smiled back at him and stood up. I almost forgot I had left early last night with the excuse that I was unwell. "That's good." He hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck. "I was wondering if we could have a chat." I was glad he was as nervous about this conversation as I was.
I could feel Severus listening in, and I couldn't do this with him making comments. "Of course. Shall we go for a walk?" I motioned for him to follow me. "What are you going to say to him?" I heard Severus call out to me as we exited the hall. I rolled my eyes and didn't respond. It is time he knew how it felt to be in the dark; he has left me there so many times before.
I cast a warming charm on us as we strolled down to the Black Lake. I didn't bother asking him where he wanted to go; I knew he wanted to be far away from the castle for this conversation. "Our paths haven't crossed much in our time here, but you have had quite an eventful six years." I laughed lightly. "Eventful is one word for it, yes." He sighed.
"I'm sorry about your godfather. I can imagine how awful it would have been." I saw a flash of Sirius' lifeless body floating away from him. He is hurting, and I had the overwhelming urge to hug him. "Thank you." Was all he managed to croak out. My heart broke for the boy; he is so alone in a world that is so against him.
Snow began falling lightly as we stared out at the frozen lake. "I'm sorry we had to talk out here. I was going to talk to you last night after Slughorn's dinner." I simply nodded, not wanting to interrupt. "I saw Snape in your room yesterday afternoon." He turned to face me. "He was in there for quite a long time. Are you alright? He was standing quite close to you. I know he is a git, so if he has threatened you in any way, I will go straight to Dumbledore." I let him ramble on; I could tell he needed to get everything off his chest.
"Thank you for your concern, Harry, but I am fine." I smiled. "My room has a password like the common rooms do. I asked him to come so he could change it for me." He wasn't convinced, so I pressed on. "The reason he stayed so long was because we were discussing the frequency of our rounds when my exams begin." I waited for him to process what I said. He was still so confused. "Considering Snape and I spend a lot of our evenings together, we have an understanding." Shit. That wasn't going to help my case. "An understanding?"
"All I mean is that I do not push his buttons, and he does not disrespect me. You know better than anyone how he loves to bully students." I tried to focus on his "git" comment. His green eyes were piercing into mine so hard that it looked like he was trying to read my mind. I had to suppress a snort at the thought. "That makes sense." He nodded slightly. "I'm sorry. Like you said, I know how much of a bully he can be." He feels so defeated. He is trying desperately to cling on to anything that will make his chaotic life make sense.
"You don't need to apologise, but I am curious as to how you knew he was in my room." As bad as I felt for him, he wasn't getting off that easily. His heart sank. He definitely regretted confronting me. "I won't be angry, Harry. I know you couldn't have physically seen us, as you were not in the Slytherin common rooms, and you were definitely not in my room." His eyes darted back towards the castle; he wanted to run. I decided on another approach.
"Have you heard of the Battle of Gellert Grindelwald?" He nodded hesitantly, confused. "My grandmother and uncle Newt fought alongside Dumbledore. He and my family have known each other for around seventy years; he attended my grandparents' wedding in the 30's." Not a complete lie. "Not even my closest friends know about my family's history with Dumbledore, and I would prefer to keep it that way." He nodded; he was still trying to figure out if he could trust me. "Considering how easily news travels around this castle, I think it's safe to say that I am very good at keeping secrets."
I could feel a small wave of sadness wash over him. "You're lucky." He sighed, turning to gaze out at the frozen Lake. "How so?" I frowned, taking in his profile. "You had the chance to keep your fame a secret." I wanted to hug him; he has had such an awful life so far. "I'm sorry, Harry. I didn't mean–" He waved his hand dismissively, cutting me off. "It's alright, Hazel." His voice was soft, but he felt so broken. He paused for a moment, trying to work up the courage to open up to me. "When my father was at school, he and his friends created a map." I nodded, waiting for him to continue as he turned to face me again. He reached into his pocket, pulled out an old piece of parchment, and unfolded it.
"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." He mumbled, tapping the parchment with his wand. I shifted, so I was standing next to him. "The Marauder's Map," I read aloud. As he opened the parchment further, I gasped. "Is that the castle?" I held one side of the map and gently turned it towards me. "Yes." I saw the names of every student and staff member moving around the map, followed by little footprints. "This shows where everyone is at any time." My eyes immediately found Severus; he was in Dumbledore's office. "Yes." He confirmed. My heart was hammering in my chest, but I had to keep calm.
"So, you were spying on me?" I laughed softly, trying to remain nonchalant, and nudged him in the arm. "Mischief managed." He tapped the map once more and placed it back in his pocket. "No." He smiled, genuinely relieved that I wasn't mad. "I just like to look at it from time to time to feel closer to my dad." He's a good liar, which isn't surprising. "I was spying on Malfoy. I need to figure out how he disappears." I bit my tongue. This is going to be a problem. "I understand." I took a step back, so I was facing him. "I will agree to keep your secret if you agree to keep mine." I extended my hand. He smiled softly and locked his hand with mine. "And if you agree not to spy on me." I winked.
I sank down in an armchair in front of my fire and sighed. I really don't want to see Severus right now, but I need to tell him about my conversation with Harry. This is bigger than keeping our bond a secret. This could affect Draco's safety, too. I poured myself a double shot of firewhiskey and paced aimlessly around my room, waiting for Severus to return to his office.
I had been staring out my window for ten minutes too long when the familiar chill ran down my spine. "Don't come in here." I warned. I knew he would try to come see me right away. "Why?" He was concerned that I was still mad at him. Which I am, but we have bigger problems right now. "I will explain everything tonight. I will join you for rounds." His concern was replaced with frustration. "You're going to make me wait?" I could feel his eye roll from here. "Payback is a bitch, Severus." I smirked, knowing that he wouldn't call me out on my language this time. "Very well. See you tonight."
I spent the rest of my afternoon with Tas in the library. We had intended to study, of course. But she wanted to hear all about Slughorn's party and more juicy stories of who Severus and I had caught during our rounds. "That reminds me. He has asked me to do rounds with him tonight." I huffed, trying to sound annoyed. "What a prick. You don't usually do rounds on a Sunday." She rolled her eyes. "I know. He said more students have been caught out of bed on Sundays, so he needs the help. I guess I'll have more stories to tell you tomorrow." I laughed.
"The prick comes in handy sometimes, I guess." She grinned. "Let's go; dinner is about to be served." I laughed as she practically skipped out of the library. "I was upset when you started doing rounds because it meant you were spending less time with me. But now I wish you had rounds every night." She laughed as we sat down at our table. I could feel Severus listening. "We can make that happen." His baritone voice almost made me whimper. "I spend too much time with him as it is." I laughed outwardly at Tas and smirked inwardly at Severus.
I want to have a shower and get changed before rounds. My conversation with Harry left me awfully sweaty. "I'm going to skip dessert." I told Tas. "I'll give you all the juicy details tomorrow." I whispered in her ear and hurried out of the hall. I knew Severus would not stay for dessert, either, so I needed to hurry. I had a quick shower, not being able to resist using the vanilla body wash I know he likes. I cursed myself. Even when I am mad at him, I am still desperate to please him. It is infuriating.
I could feel him in his office, and I knew he was waiting for me. It was almost eight o'clock. I chose a black lacy bralette, a matching G-string, jeans, and the same green turtleneck that I wore the night of the Slytherin party. I chuckled, knowing he was going to have to suffer seeing my nipples through the tight knit top. As it was my idea to meet tonight, I chose not to wait for permission to floo to his office.
My smugness was short-lived as I stepped out of the fireplace. He was standing directly in front of me, waiting. His eyes immediately dropped to my chest, where my nipples were already straining against my shirt, and he smirked. "Won't you be cold?" He waved his hand and cleaned the soot off my clothes and face. "I think I'll cope." I strode past him towards the door. "Let's get this over with, shall we?" I didn't wait for him to respond before I opened his door and turned down the hall.
I made sure to keep him just out of arm's reach. "Harry has a map of the school. He said his dad made it when he was a student here." I began. "The Marauder's Map. There were names on it, but all I caught was "Prongs"." He groaned so suddenly that I flinched. "I should have known there was more to that piece of parchment." He clenched his fists. "Have you seen it before?" I frowned, glancing at him. "Briefly, in Potter's third year. "Prongs" is his swine of a father." He sneered. I thought it was best to move on; Harry and his father are clearly a sore spot.
"It shows where everyone is at every minute – even Dumbledore. He has been watching Draco, and that is how he saw you in my room." I could feel panic rising in him. "He also said Draco has been disappearing from the map, though. I doubt he is leaving the grounds, so I don't know where he could be going." I mused. He stopped walking, frowning at the ground. "I think I know where." He spun on his heel. "Come." He beckoned me to follow him.
We approached a portrait of a young woman cradling a baby, lulling him to sleep. She smiled when she saw Severus. "Swans a swimming." He announced. The woman nodded reverently, and the portrait swung open, revealing a narrow passageway. "Swans?" Some of the passwords at this school make no sense. "Seven swans a swimming. Albus loves Christmas carols." He ushered me ahead of him. The passageway was dark, so Severus cast lumos. The stone walls and floor were jagged, cold, and wet. I had to watch where I placed my feet, or I would slip.
At the end of it was a short ladder that led to a landing with a door that I assumed belonged to another portrait. As I stepped up onto the first rung, I felt Severus' hand gently lay on my back, steadying me. His touch was a welcome warmth in this freezing passageway. "I won't break my neck, Severus." I glanced back at him briefly before continuing my short ascent. "This ladder has been here for centuries, so forgive me for lacking trust." The landing was barely big enough for one person, so when he climbed to the top, we were pressed against each other.
I suppressed a whimper at the heat that shot to my core from being so close to him. "You can't seem to make up your mind." He smirked as he pushed the portrait open and stepped out into the hallway. I huffed as I waited for him to ensure we were alone before following him. I looked around, finding my bearings. "The seventh floor." Dumbledore's Christmas password finally made sense. Severus chuckled lightly. "He thinks he is clever."
We approached a tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy trying to teach trolls ballet. There are thousands of tapestries in this castle, but this one always makes me laugh. As I turned around, I saw Severus pacing slowly in front of the opposite wall with his eyes closed, frowning slightly. "A place to talk in private." He turned around and walked past the wall again. "A place to talk in private." He repeated. I frowned at him, confused. When he turned and repeated the line a third time, the wall began to crumble.
My jaw dropped as a large door faded into view. I didn't have a chance to voice my shock before Severus grabbed me by the arm and dragged me through the door. The room was large, with a ceiling that was too high to see. There wasn't much in the room other than some large, plush couches surrounding a fireplace and a few piles of old desks and chairs. "The come-and-go room?" I turned to him, trying to suppress a grin. "Or the Room of Requirement, yes. No one will hear us in here. Draco must be using this room, and I presume Potter and his followers didn't know it existed. Hence, it was excluded from their map."
I walked slowly around the room, running my fingers over the dusty desks. "What are we going to do about Harry's map?" I asked, not turning to face him. "I will have to confiscate it." He drawled, as if that were the obvious answer. "You can't, Severus. He will know I told you; he is suspicious enough as it is." I waved my hand and cast scourgify, clearing up the dust. I didn't need to, but I wanted to keep my hands busy. I heard him laugh softly from across the room, and I rolled my eyes.
"You can't tell Draco about the map, but you need to tell him to be more careful. If he is using this room for his task, then he needs to do it at a time when Harry won't be looking. Like at meals or during class." As I instructed him, I could feel my anger pulsing through my veins hotter than before. I turned to face him, and he remained silent as we stood across the room from each other.
"You left me again, Severus." I could feel my voice start to shake, but I couldn't let myself cry. "You didn't help me; you didn't console me; you didn't even look at me." I clenched my fists, digging my nails into my palms. "This doesn't only affect Draco; this affects us." My voice was getting louder. He took a small step forward. "I'm sorry, Hazel. I –" I threw my hand up, cutting him off. "I'm not finished. Every time I feel like I am making progress with you, I get the door slammed in my face. Every. Single. Time."
I could feel my cheeks getting redder. "How am I supposed to feel, Severus? The way you touch me, hold me, and kiss me as if I am the only thing that matters in this world. And then the second there is a bump in the road, you run for the hills!" He is slowly getting closer to me. "I know you have lost people in your past. I know your life has been less than perfect. I know you have scars that are too painful to share." I'm almost yelling now. "But, I also know that there is more than just a bond that brings you to my room." I bit my cheek to keep the tears at bay. He was less than a metre in front of me now.
"I can't keep doing this, Severus. You gave me your key, but you still lock me out." I was panting. "We don't know why we were brought together, but I do know it is because we need each other. But you keep leaving me." I softened my voice as he towered over me. My heart is hammering in my chest. Throughout my rampage, I haven't stopped to hear what he might be feeling. A mix of regret, shame, anxiety, and desperation pulsed through him. His eyes had not left mine for a moment. He slowly brought his hands up to rest on my cheeks. I sighed into his touch and a lone tear fell. "I need you, Sev."
"I need you, too." He let his desperation win. His lips crashed onto mine with a force that knocked the air out of my lungs. It was frantic, desperate, and hot. He slipped his tongue in, instantly dominating mine. I gasped as he backed me into one of the abandoned desks and lifted me to sit on it. He slipped out of his robe, and I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him flush against me. I moaned when I felt his rock-hard bulge press against my dripping core.
I broke our kiss, lifted my shirt, and ripped it over my head. Keeping our eyes locked, I slowly reached behind my back and unclipped my bralette. As I slipped it off and dropped it to the floor, he kept his hands on my thighs, and his eyes on mine, waiting for consent. "Look at me, Sev." He looked between my eyes for a moment, before letting them drop. He let out a shuddering groan that made my core throb. My tits were rising and falling with my ragged breaths, and my nipples were painfully hard. I could feel his hands twitch. "Touch me, Sev." I knew he was still waiting for consent, but I was practically begging.
He looked back up at my eyes as his hands glided up my waist and over my stomach. Finally, after a month of desperate attempts to get him to touch me, I felt his broad hands cover my swollen and needy tits. When he let out a low growl, I felt my core gush, and I arched my back, pressing myself further into his touch. He was soft at first, still cautious. But as I moaned and panted beneath his touch, he lost control. I yelped, and I threw my head back as he rolled my nipples between his thumb and index finger. He wasted no time in latching his mouth onto my neck, quickly finding my pulse point, and sucking, marking me as his once more.
As I rolled my hips against his, I felt his dick twitch against me, and the ache in my core became unbearable. I dropped my legs, kicked my shoes off and reached between us to unbutton my jeans. He dropped his hands from my tits, grabbed the band of my jeans and tugged them down. I had to lift myself slightly as he ripped them off my legs. He took a small step back, relishing at the sight of me panting and trembling beneath him. "Beautiful."He was panting and trembling too. I smiled at his compliment, and reached out to run my hands up his abdomen.
He hesitated for a moment, as if reality had finally struck him. He peered down at my hands that rested against his chest, his breath faltering. I waited patiently for him to decide our next moves. He looked back into my eyes, desire swimming in the black depths of his own, and clicked his fingers. His outer layers vanished, leaving him in only a white button-up and his trousers. I smiled warmly at him as I ran my hands up his chest and unbuttoned his shirt down to his belly button.
My heart sank when I saw that his chest and abdomen were riddled with pink and white scars of various shapes and sizes. "A story for another time." He cupped my cheeks and pressed his lips against mine again. After our short rest, drinking in the sight of each other, our hunger was back.
I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him back into me. As I rolled my hips against him again, he groaned, dropped his right hand slowly to the band of my G-string, and paused. "Please, Sev." I knew he was still waiting for consent, but I was dripping with desperation. We both moaned as his fingers slid into my knickers, and he felt how wet I was. "Fuck, Hazel."I shuddered at hearing him curse my name. His large, lightly calloused hand pressed firmly against my soaked pussy. As his tongue continued battling with mine, he began rubbing slow circles on my swollen clit. I whimpered and moaned and rolled my hips, pleading for more.
Finally, and painfully slowly, he slipped one finger into my throbbing entrance. The magic of our bond surged through his finger and fired every neuron in my body. It was electrifying. I gasped and threw my head back as he started to slowly pump his finger in and out. "Are you alright?"More than. "Yes, please, Sev."I begged. I cried out as he latched his mouth to my neck, occupied his free hand with my right tit, and slipped another finger inside me. "Fuck, Sev!" I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, hanging on tightly. Hearing me scream his name was all the motivation he needed. He hooked his fingers to hit my g-spot perfectly.
He began fucking me and rubbing circles over my clit at a pace that had my vision blurring and the desk shaking beneath me. I knew I was close; I was panting with every thrust. As he bit down on my neck and pinched my nipple, I crashed over the edge, screaming out a version of his name as I came around his fingers. I fell back against the desk as stars danced across my eyes. He slowed his thrusts, allowing me to ride out my high. My legs were shaking, and I could barely hear anything over the hammering of my heart in my chest.
I sighed at the empty feeling as he pulled his fingers out, but I glanced up at him and watched as he sucked my essence off his fingers. I whimpered; the intimacy made my pussy throb anew, and he quickly leant over me, covering my mouth with his once more. I moaned into him as I tasted myself on his tongue. I drank him into my mouth, relishing in the feel of our hammering heartbeats and the ebbing magic pulsing through us. He wrapped his arms around my back and slowly lifted me to sit up. He kept his hands on my waist, and I ran my hands up and down his chest.
"That was incredible." I breathed, smiling up at him, my cheeks flushed from my climax. "More than." He smirked and placed a quick peck on my lips. I want him to feel as amazing as I do, so I reached out and palmed his dick over his trousers, moaning at the feeling. He was huge – much bigger than Draco. He growled, grabbed my wrist lightly, and pulled my hand away. "Not tonight, darling." He took a small step back. I pouted; I wanted to satisfy him, too. "Oh, believe me, I am satisfied."He smirked.
He grabbed my hands and helped me hop off the desk. With a wave of his wand, he cleaned us both up and redressed me. He cupped my cheeks and kissed me delicately. "We have to be more careful now." He took me by the hand and led me to the door. "I know." I sighed. "You know, this doesn't make up for being a git last night." I stopped him before he opened the door. "The way that your legs are still shaking would tell me otherwise." He smirked as my jaw dropped. "Let's get you to bed." He leant down and stole a final kiss before escorting me back through the hidden passage and down to the dungeons.