AN: It's been a little bit since the last chapter, but I needed a small break. Also, circumstances have conspired to keep me surprisingly busy, even though I'm self-isolating. Regardless, here's some more Gigant.
Maximess: Pleasantly surprised to see that someone picked up on that reference, kudos dude. I also threw in a nod to VR Troopers somewhere :)
Lynn Loud hummed to herself as she took stock of her backpack one final time. Sweatbands: check. Assorted sports balls: check. Sports bars and water bottles: check. Self defense weapons: Lynn clenched her fists and flexed her arms, allowing herself a satisfied smirk as her toned, but normally slender arms briefly rippled with sudden musculature. Check, and double check, she chuckled to herself, as she turned her attention back to her bag. And the pièce de résistance: an extra pair of running shoes, size dopey little brother. Check.
"I sense doom in your future."
Lynn frowned as she looked up from her task. On the other side of the room sat Lucy, who in spite of her sinister prediction, remained engrossed in the latest entry of that dumb vampire romance series she loved so much (Red Like Blood? Great name, that. Must have spent a whole minute coming up with that one.)
"Your crystal ball tell you that?" Lynn asked irritably, trying to rearrange her supplies so they would fit within the confines of the bag without unnecessary squishing.
"Nope." The younger girl replied, turning the page of her book with a very slow and deliberate flick of her finger. "That's just pattern recognition."
"I don't know what you're talking ab—"
"You tried to get Lincoln to go swimming with you at the motel. Luan got you with the old 'look behind you' trick, and escaped via unicycle with Lincoln in tow while you were distracted." Lucy recited, still not looking up from her book."
"It was Luan!" Lynn shouted, pounding on fist on her backpack in frustration. "It's more surprising that there wasn't something there!"
"You threw away every box of Lincoln's favorite cereal in the breakfast bar just so you could surprise him with the one remaining box you'd set aside, and try to get him to share it with you." Lucy continued, undeterred. "Which Leni ruined by taking everyone's cereals and making surprisingly delicious breakfast smoothies."
"Oh come on. How could I have possibly predicted that one?" Lynn protested. "The breakfast bar didn't even have a blender!" She took a deep breath to steady herself. "Besides, we're back home now. That means I should have the home field advantage."
"We all live here."
"I think Luna might live at Sam's now." Lynn paused thoughtfully. "Even so, now I know the terrain. I can cover all the angles, account for all possibilities. Because I'm Lynn Loud, and I never lose!" Lynn punctuated her words with a proud and hearty thumping of her own chest.
"Oh?" Now Lucy deigned to turn her full attention towards Lynn, the barest hint of a smile on her pallid lips. "Tell me, how is your arm feeling?"
"Alright!" Lynn roared as she burst through Lincoln's bedroom door. "Grab your stuff, Linc! Because you, and me are...
Lynn trailed off, trying to figure out what it was she had walked into. It appeared that Luan had strapped Lincoln to herself with bungie chords, his face shoved between her stupid new boobs ("Puberty is a harsh mistress" Lucy would lament despondently), and was trying to escape out the window. From the looks of things, Lori had literally caught her in the act, and was trying to drag Luan back into the house by her ankles, while Lincoln clung to the partially suspended comedienne for dear life. Leni was sitting off to the side on Lincoln's bed, whistling to herself and knitting a bright orange scarf.
"What?!" Two female voices grunted in irritation, turning their attentions to the athlete.
"Hi Lynn." Leni greeted, looking up from her work to give the younger girl a small, but enthusiastic wave, which Lynn found herself absentmindedly returning.
"I, uh..." Lynn fumbled, trying to regain her momentum. "I-I'm here for Lincoln!" She desperately wracked her brain, trying to remember the fiery speech she'd written for the occasion.
"Gimme!" She shouted at last, stamping her foot in annoyance, hoping her display of anger would make up for her lack of elegance or speech craft.
"No!" Lori growled, hauling Lincoln and Luan back into the room with one, last, mighty heave. The act dislodged the pair, Luan sailing over Lynn's head with a cry of surprise, out the opened door and into parts unknown, though a muffled crash in the distance suggested that the clown-shaped missile had eventually found itself at rest. Lincoln flew upwards in a lazy arc, but before either Lynn or Lori could move to rescue him, he was deftly snatched out of the air by Leni, who tucked the young boy under her arm and returned to her knitting.
"Well played, Leni." Lori remarked, before turning back towards the athlete. "Buzz off, Lynn, Lincoln's busy." A muffled cry came from the boy in question, currently being cuddled to death by Leni, but Lynn was unable to ascertain if he was affirming or denying Lori's claim.
"I'm not leaving without a fight!" Lynn proclaimed, shooting a worried glance at her younger brother, still writhing in Leni's grip.
"Oh?" Lori crossed the room and leaned over, looking the shorter girl right in the face. "And just what did you have in mind?"
"Arm wrestling." Lynn flexed one arm for emphasis. "Winner takes Lincoln!" This caused Leni to finally look up from her project.
"Um, Lori? Maybe you should—"
"Done." Lori immediately agreed, smirking and cracking her knuckles. Lynn wasn't certain where this confidence came from, but she knew for a fact that the older girl had made a grave mistake in agreeing to tangle with Lynn Loud...
"That match couldn't have been more one-sided if you were a vampire and Lori was the sun." Lucy interjected, with an uncharacteristic amount of decidedly non-gothic glee in her tone.
Lynn clamped her mouth shut, directing a withering glare at the younger girl in lieu of a response. As much as it burned Lynn up inside to admit it, Lucy was right. Lori had destroyed her, and for the life of her, Lynn couldn't figure out how she'd done it.
Credit where credit's due, the Louds were a pretty rowdy bunch and Lori managed to rank among the toughest of them. However, this was largely due to her age, her size, and the sheer amount of ruthlessness the eldest Loud sibling could display when she was sufficiently motivated. Lori Loud was a scrapper, and Lynn had no problem with admitting that in a competition where Lori was able to put those qualities to use, like fighting over the tv remote or the last slice of pizza, Lynn could (and often did) lose out to the older girl. But outside of, perhaps, a thumb wrestling contest (all that time Lori spent on her phone had to be good for something), it was inconceivable that a soft, girly girl like Lori Loud would be able to straight up out-muscle a finely honed athlete like herself.
"Come on, Lynn." Lori jeered, cackling as she effortlessly slammed Lynn's hand onto the tabletop for the eighth time in a row. "Again! You almost had me that time!"
"I...I wasn't feeling well that day." Lynn mumbled, absentmindedly massaging the arm that had failed her.
"I'll bet. Getting beaten like one of Luna's drums would make anyone feel bad."
"S-shut up!" Lynn shouted, feeling herself flush red, equal parts embarrassed and infuriated. She'd intended to say more, but, in a truly heroic display of willpower, refrained from doing so. Instead, Lynn took one, deep, shuddering breath, then slowly let it out. She repeated the process several times, each time feeling her rage ebb a little more than the last.
"Wow." Lucy said, several cycles later. "That was an impressive amount of restraint. For you, at least."
"I've been practicing." Lynn hissed once she felt she had regained sufficient control of herself. She straightened up, her mind once again clear, and looked her little sister in the eye (or at least the closest approximation she could manage, stupid goth bangs). "The point is, this is a fight that needs to be fought. Those girls have been hogging Lincoln all to themselves, and I'm sick of it! As Lincoln's favorite sister—"
"I'm pretty sure Leni's Lincoln's favorite right now." Lucy muttered.
"—I am entitled to my share of Lincoln time!" Lynn carried on, choosing to ignore the younger girl's strangely ominous words. "And I intend to get what's mine!"
"Believe me, Lynn, we all want our Lincoln time." Lucy sighed, turning her attention back to her book. "But you're clearly fighting a losing battle here. There's too many of them." The diminutive goth glanced down at herself, a small frown making its way onto her face. "And too much of them."
"Says you." Lynn scoffed, shouldering her bag and making her way towards the door. "Lynn Loud doesn't give up, Lynn Loud plays to win!"
"Does Lynn Loud know what a pronoun is?" Lucy called after Lynn as she exited into the hallway.
"Lynn Loud can't hear you!"
"Lincoln!" Lynn shouted, bursting through her brother's door with a dynamic, and stylish, flying dragon kick. The boy's doorknob, as it so often was these days, had been crushed into a twisted, misshapen lump of metal, rendering the door effectively jammed shut. But Lynn was nothing if not a problem solver. "Emergency! I need...you...to..."
Lynn trailed off, blinking stupidly. Much to her surprise, Lincoln's room, which so frequently looked like a warzone these days thanks to the antics of their older sisters, was completely bereft of such foreign influences. It's sole occupant being the boy himself, sitting astride his bed and carefully tending to a stack of comic books.
"Hey Lynn." He greeted her. "What's going on?"
"Uh...nothing." Lynn replied, glancing around warily. "Where's all the..." She gestured vaguely. "Everything."
Lincoln shrugged and turned his attention back to his comics. "Leni and Lori are out shopping, and Luan was booked to perform at a birthday party..."
The crowd looked on in awe, parents and children alike equally speechless as the buxom clown girl effortlessly juggled a set of barbells as easily as if they were a set of run of the mill juggling clubs. She let out one, final, dramatic flourish, launching the entire set up into the air, did a graceful pirouette, and then bowed for her audience, not even bothering to look as the barbells fell one by one into a neat pile beside her. The crowd erupted into applause at this display of skill, only pausing to wince in unison as each barbell landed onto the pile with a loud thunk noise, subsequent impacts causing the stack to sink deeper and deeper into the soft earth below.
"Thank you!" Luan shouted, straightening up with a big smile on her face. "And now for my next trick. Giggles! Release the bear!"
"...where I'm sure she's acting like a consummate professional." Lincoln concluded
"W-why did you do that?" Lynn asked.
"Do what?" Lincoln selected a volume from the stack and began carefully examining the spine.
"Trail off like that!" Lynn demanded. "And then pause! Like you were waiting for something!"
"I don't know what you're talking about, Lynn." Lincoln said, calmly putting the book back on the pile before turning his attention back to her. "Now, what can I do for you?"
Lynn wanted to press the issue, to get some clarity on that particular bit of strangeness. But her eyes met with Lincoln's, and suddenly that didn't seem to matter anymore. There was something so calming about that gaze of his. it was warm and inviting, promising everything, and asking nothing. Standing there, alone with Lincoln, her the sole focus of his attention for the first time in what seemed like forever, it suddenly became difficult to care about anything else. Then, a single ray of sunshine pierced the window, illuminating the boy with an almost angelic glow.
"Run away with me." Lynn murmured, dumbfounded.
"What?" Lincoln's head tilted to the side, perplexed.
"I mean go running!" Lynn shouted, correcting herself. "With me!" She gestured at her sneakers, hoping to illustrate her point without any further faux pas. "Please?"
"Sure." Lincoln replied immediately, hopping off his bed and striding over to her.
"Really?" Lynn was taken aback by this uncharacteristic display of...well, not exactly enthusiasm, but acceptance, at least, from her little brother. Normally she'd have to browbeat the boy a little to get him to spend time with her, or break out the puppy eyes in more extreme situations.
"Of course." Said Lincoln as he begun stretching, just like Lynn had shown him. "Feels like its been forever since we've hung out. I think I could put up with a little running if need be." Stretching completed, he straightened up and extended his hand towards Lynn, smiling warmly. "Shall we?"
If Lynn was being perfectly honest with herself, there was a part of her that was afraid of that hand. Of the way her palms got clammy when she thought about taking it in her own, allowing her body heat to mingle with her brother's. Of the way her heartrocket began skyrating when he looked at her, just like that. Like she was the only person in the world. It was both exhilarating and terrifying in equal measure.
Thankfully, the rest of her wasn't paying attention to that part, as the second she'd began to contemplate the implications of this outing, her instincts had taken over, and she'd snatched the proffered appendage and raced out of the room at top speed. Not long after, a red and brown blur exploded out of the Loud House and took off down the street, dragging a screaming white streak behind it.
Sam Sharp steeled her nerves, trying to psyche herself up for the ordeal that was ahead of her. An unusual reaction to have when one was about to enter their own bedroom, admittedly, but this was a fairly unusual situation to begin with. And one that, to her mind, could only be solved with a fairly unusual answer. Thus prepared, she took a deep breath, and breached the portal to her inner sanctum.
"'ello, luv."
The friendly, loving smile Sam had affected before entering the room stiffened somewhat. There was Luna, her wonderful, talented, beautiful girlfriend. Sprawled out on Sam's bed, waiting for her. Again. She added "making those words sound irritating" to her mental tally of grievances, before sliding the door shut behind her, and taking a seat at the foot of the bed.
"Saw your guitar needed restringing." Said Luna as she went about her task. "Thought I'd help you out."
Sam nodded in acknowledgement. Her acoustic guitar did need restringing. The strings had broken because Luna had taken it upon herself to tune the instrument for her. For the forty-seventh time. Before that, she had busied herself with maintaining Sam's drum kit, with similar results. Though, admittedly, these chores were far preferable to when Luna had taken it upon herself to take care of Sam's goldfish. Least of all because Sam hadn't actually owned a goldfish at the time.
She absentmindedly waved towards Reel Smol Fish, her other impromptu roommate, still wondering where Luna had managed to find it before turning her attention back to her girlfriend.
"Luna." She began, gently patting the other girl's leg. "Honey? We need to talk."
"Of course." Luna replied, not bothering to look up. "Anything you need babe, I am here to listen."
"You need to go back home." Sam blurted out, trying to rip off the metaphorical band-aid.
Twang. Luna had recoiled in horror at Sam's statement, inadvertently strumming her guitar. She had to hand it to the loudest Loud, it was tuned to perfection.
"Look, Lunes." She went on, trying to placate the girl. "Don't get me wrong, I love having you here—" Sam prided herself on the fact that she'd manage to keep her face straight while saying that "—but you were only supposed to be here for a couple of days. My parents are concerned about the fact that you...kinda live here now."
"Oh, I get it." Luna's face darkened. "Your parents can't handle the fact that you're dating a girl. Is that it?"
"Actually, my parents have been really supportive of us." Sam corrected her, trying not to smirk. "They're pretty woke like that. They don't even mind that you get kinda...uh, loud? When we're having our alone time. But..." Sam cleared her throat "They would like to know who that 'Lincoln' fellow is, and why he keeps coming up in our... 'conversations'."
Sam scooted herself closer to Luna, slapping the other girl's hand as it crept back towards the discarded guitar. She wrapped her arms around Luna and pulled her into a warm embrace, nuzzling the other girl's cheek with her own.
"It's not that I don't want to mate with you, hun." She reassured her trembling, distraught girlfriend. "I just don't want to roommate with you. Not while you're like this."
"If I go back home, he's going to be there." Luna murmured unto Sam's shoulder.
"I know, babe."
"And he's gonna be all cute, and lovable, and perfect, and related to me."
"I-I know, I know." Sam replied, hoping Luna didn't notice the hitch in her voice. She was trying to be supportive, but it wasn't her fault that Lunacoln sounded hawt. She wanted to ship that almost as badly as she wanted to be involved.
"Listen, Luna." Sam released her hold on the girl and held her at arm's length, making sure to look her straight in the eye. "We're going to make this right, okay? You're going to go home, and we're going to get you your man." And then you're going to let me watch him defile you, she thought.
"I-I think you did that thing again, babe." Luna spoke up, haltingly. "Where you think you're thinking something, but you're actually saying it out loud. Also, you're drooling."
Crap. Foiled by her libido. Again.
"Regardless." Sam took a moment to wipe her mouth on her sleeve, before firmly clasping Luna's shoulders once again. "I have a plan. One which can't possibly fail."
"And if it does?" Luna frowned, seemingly unconvinced.
"Then I might have to break up with you." Sam admitted. "Because you're driving me nuts." She peered off into the distance, stroking her chin contemplatively. "Do you think Lincoln likes blondes?"
It was a joke. Alright, it was mostly a joke. At least 75%, she was fairly certain. She thought they'd have a good laugh over it. Unfortunately, Sam's dedication to her bit prevented her from seeing the flash of fury in Luna's eyes. Or the way the girl's hand snaked out towards the fallen guitar with unnatural speed.
KABONG!