WELL, WELL, WELL! GUESS WHO ISN'T SICK ANYMORE?! THAT'S RIGHT, I'M BACK, AND I DIDN'T DISAPPEAR FOR A YEAR! ARE YOU PROUD OF ME!? :D Anywho, I come bearing gifts. That's right, it's an early Christmas gift! ! (Warning, this chapter may or may not contain someone realizing they're in love…) Anyways, with the Christmas party coming up, (which at this rate may actually be published in july, lol), it's time to close up some plots so we can concentrate on Ivan and Alfred's relationship. Enjoy the chapter! BYEEEEEE!
Ivan was concerned. Now, there weren't many things in his life that made him nervous, but there was a short list. Of course, his younger sister was at the top of that list. So was the chill of winter and his boss. However, he was considering adding another item to the list as he watched Alfred from the kitchen as the younger nation walked around his living room as he cleaned. Now, he usually wouldn't think twice about this kind of situation. He hadn't even blinked an eye when Alfred lifted the couch up above his head as he vacuumed. No, this kind of thing was normal, even expected.
No, what was a problem was the fact everytime Alfred had looked over at him, he broke into a wide smile and started to giggle. He giggled like he heard the most amusing joke he had ever heard. Every. Single. Time. It was, in every sense of the word, unnerving. And the worst part? Alfred had been giggling since he had left the apartment yesterday. He held up his newspaper and stared at the words in front of him as he desperately tried to ignore the younger nation behind him, who had started to hum some kind of jingle from the tv. As he heard another giggle behind him, he was reminded of all the times he had laughed or smiled at the other nations at their world meetings. For the first time in his life, he finally felt sympathy for them.
He wasn't sure what to do. He had never seen Alfred act like this before, and when he had asked him earlier why he was acting like this, the younger nation had only given him a larger smile and shook his head in amusement before walking away, much to Ivans confusion. Had he finally snapped from the stress from the last few weeks? Did he accidentally get high? Was Alfred just trying to annoy him? He didn't understand! What the hell was going on?! He heard another giggle, and he felt his eye twitch. Slowly putting down his newspaper, he stood up and stiffly walked back to his room, gently closing his door behind him. Then taking a few deep breaths, he pulled out his phone and scrolled through the numbers on it, until he finally chose one.
After the phone rang a few times, a small, terrified voice answered. "R-Russia?" came the shaking voice of Lithuania. "W-what can i do for you?"
"You lived with Alfred before, da?" Ivan asked slowly, eyeing the door behind him like it might explode at any second.
Of all the things in the world Lithuania expected, that had not been one of them. There was a long pause as Lithuania processed the question, before he slowly replied with a cautious "Yes….?"
"Then you know how he behaves when he is alone, da?"
"I… guess?"
"Do you know what it means when he will not stop giggling?" Ivan asked, lowering his voice slightly. "He has been acting strangely since yesterday, and I do not know why."
"Well, I am not sure. What kind of giggle is it?" Lithuania asked, sounding a little calmer now that he knew he wasn't going to be threatened.
"A happy one?" Ivan said helplessly. "I do not know! He keeps smiling and giggling at me!"
"Just when he looks at you?"
"Yes!" Ivan said with a quick nod.
"Did anything weird happen before this started?"
"He ran out the door in a hurry yesterday. I do not know why, but he was excited for some reason."
Lithuania hummed for a moment as he thought. Ivan tapped his foot impatiently as he waited. Then suddenly, Lithuania let out a chuckle of his own.
"Ah, I had almost forgotten. Alfred does that sometimes around this time of year. Don't worry, it's nothing bad."
"Are you sure?" Ivan asked worriedly.
"I swear, this is normal. I'm surprised you've never seen him like that before." Lithuania said in amusement. "It just means that he's found you a very good gift."
"A gift?" Ivan asked in surprise.
"You know, for Christmas?"
Ivan gave the phone in his hands a skeptical look. "Why would he act like that because of a present? He did not act like that with the other gifts he bought."
"Oh, he doesn't do it for every gift, just the ones he knows will make the other person very happy. The problem is he really wants to tell you because he's excited, but he can't because that'll ruin the surprise. So he's just getting excited when he sees you." Lithuania explained with a hint of amusement in his voice. "It's really obvious once you figure it out."
Ivan stared at the phone for a few seconds. "That is the truth?" Ivan asked, suddenly sounding serious.
"Yes!" Lithuania squeaked in terror, not expecting the other nation's mood to turn so suddenly.
"You are not lying?"
"I swear I'm not!" Lithuania begged. "Why would I lie about that?!"
Ivan didn't say anything for a few seconds. Then with a strained voice he finally said. "Fine. You have been helpful. Goodbye." Hanging up on a very terrified and confused Lithuania, Ivan all but ran over to one of the nearby pillows on his bed, and picking it up he buried his face in it, trying and failing to stop himself from laughing.
Honestly, he should have known about Alfred's quirks by now, but the thought of the younger nation getting over excited about such a little thing made him want to pick Alfred up and never let him go. It was such a simple and cute reaction that Ivan didn't know what else to do. He suddenly imagined Alfred as an over excited Golden retriever, and he couldn't help but laugh even harder. It was just such an Alfred thing to do. Smiling into the pillow, Ivan couldn't help but feel his heart getting warm at the thought of Alfred getting genuinely excited about seeing him around.
As he stood there, letting himself bask in his happy feelings, he realized that he still hadn't picked up a gift for Alfred yet. Not that it was a major problem, (he still had time to pick one up later), but it made him a little nervous. After all, Alfred was so sure that he would love his gift, so he suddenly felt pressured to make a good choice so Alfred wouldn't be disappointed. Humming in thought, he pulled his face off the pillow and looked thoughtfully out his bedroom window. He knew that Alfred loved many things, (He wasn't exactly subtle about the things he liked), but as he ran down the list of items in his head, many of them seemed to be too shallow or thoughtless to give to Alfred.
Ivan didn't like just giving any old gift to friends. Any gift he gave should have importance and personal meaning behind it, so it would be treasured and loved. So any old video game or book wasn't going to cut it. As he stood there debating his choices, he heard three quick knocks on his door.
"Ivan!" Alfred said excitedly from the other side of the door. "Can I come in for a sec?!"
Ivan, realizing that he was still holding his pillow like a stuffed bear, quickly threw it onto the bed and he walked over to the door and as soon as it was opened he saw Alfred beaming up at him with that million watt smile. Ivan only had a second to realize that his heart had skipped a beat when Alfred started talking.
"Hey, do you still want to go out today?" Alfred asked, his eyes basically sparkling with excitement. "If so, did you want to go out to broadway? They're having a few shows tonight, and I finally got my boss to agree to hook us up with tickets to anything we want to watch. I have the list here!" Alfred said, handing Ivan a printed out paper of times and shows. Ivan took the paper without much thought, still fixated on the other nation's beaming face.
"So, we couldn't get tickets to Hamilton, but I've narrowed it down to some of the more popular shows!" Alfred said, getting close to Ivan as he pointed out some of the shows. Ivan was painfully aware of every stray touch from Alfred. Something in his heart seemed to squeeze sharply at every light brush of the younger nation's hand. He wasn't even listening anymore as Alfred happily chatted away, as he was too focused on trying to calm down. He wasn't sure why he was acting like this. It wasn't like anything had changed between them lately, but the more he tried to control his emotions, the more he felt his heart squeeze.
Trying to get some space between him and Alfred, he quickly cut off Alfred by pointing randomly at one of the shows and giving Alfred a small smile. "How about this show?"
"Hmm? Oh, I should have known." Alfred said with a chuckle. "You seem to have a thing for the romantic ones."
Confused, Ivan actually looked at what he picked out and was slightly amused by the fact that he had picked out the phantom of the opera. "Ah, it seems like it, da." He said, somewhat feeling like the universe seemed to have an ironic sense of humor. "At least it is not a tragic romance."
"Depends on whose point of view you're talking about." Alfred joked, taking the paper and patting Ivan on his arm, making Ivan heart do that weird jump again. "Okay, I'll email my boss and he'll get us some box seats."
"This late into the season?" Ivan asked, legitimately surprised.
"My boss has connections." Alfred said with a small chuckle of amusement. "Anyways, if we're going there tonight, I guess I'll have to wear the nice suit again. Make sure you dress up as well, handsome." Alfred teased, winking up at Ivan with a cheeky grin.
"Of course darling." Ivan quipped back, mostly from habit.
"Aw, I knew you cared." Alfred said with a laugh, and with that Alfred went back towards the living room to probably finish his cleaning, but as Ivan closed his bedroom door, he felt his cheeks warming up. It must have been from the cold. Although, for some reason he felt very warm.
_Later_
Ivan was still feeling a little warm as the evening rolled around. He felt a strange light feeling in his heart as he got ready, but he tried to ignore it as he put on one of his nicer white watches. He wasn't sure what was wrong with his face, but it seemed to be wanting to stay pink for some reason. Glancing up at his reflection, he frowned as he saw his cheeks had patches of pink in them. Without thinking, he poked one of them with a huff, trying to will them away. When that obviously didn't work, he sighed and shook his head. Hoping that he wasn't getting sick, (it was flu season after all), made a mental note to bundle up more.
As soon as he had his watch on properly, he fixed his sleeve and took a step back, checking himself out in the full length mirror in his room. He looked, he thought with a small smirk, very nice. He had traded out the gray suit he had worn last time for a black suit with a gray tie. It made his white scarf and watch pop out more, and he had made sure that his hair, (which he had left a little messy lately), was nicely combed. Giving himself a final look over, he nodded once and picking his coat and gloves up from his bed and opening his bedroom door he made his way to the kitchen.
When he reached the end of the hall, he stopped as soon as he saw Alfred. Alfred was sitting on one of the bar stools and he was playing with Hero with a cat toy, waving it above the cat's head so that Hero had to reach up to bat at it. But that wasn't what made him stop. Alfred looked good. Really good. Unlike the last time he had dressed up, he looked a lot more relaxed. He was wearing a dark blue suit, which seemed to be form fitted for him, and was wearing a red tie. His hair, unlike last time, wasn't combed back but just a little neater than usual. He was already wearing a pair of gloves, and had his coat and scarf thrown over the counter next to him. He was also chuckling every now and then as Hero missed the toy. He just looked so… himself. Perfect.
Ivan stood there for a moment, just admiring the younger nation. He felt himself relax a little as he watched him. It was such a soft moment. It felt so natural, like life was supposed to be this way. Something he hadn't experienced in quite some time. A small part of him wanted to bottle up this moment in time, and hide it away from the rest of the world so that it could last forever. But again, time couldn't stay still.
He must have felt Ivan staring at him, because after a few seconds Alfred glanced over at him, and beaming at him, (which made Ivan's heart do that weird stutter again), he waved Ivan over.
"I was just about to go get you." Alfred said, as he let Hero snag the toy out of his hand and run under the couth, meowing happily. Alfred looked over Ivan once and then let out an impressed hum. "Well, well. You sure do shape up nice." Alfred teased, poking Ivans arm.
"I do try." Ivan responded, trying to ignore the strange warm feeling in his chest. "I thought you didn't have any other suits? Where did you get that one?" Ivan asked curiously.
"Oh, this?" Alfred asked, glancing down at his suit with a half amused, half exasperated expression. "This is one of my suits for the world meetings. I forgot I had it hanging up in the back of my closet until I saw it there earlier. My boss got it for me after I forgot to bring a suit to one of his parties once. I wish I had seen it earlier, I would have saved a shit load of money. Why does it look a little tight?" Alfred asked with a worried expression.
"It looks fine." Ivan assured quickly, mentally thanking Alfred's boss in his head for his good taste. "Are you ready to go?"
"Yep!" Alfred said happily, hopping off the stools and as he put on his coat and gloves, Ivan quickly made himself busy doing the same. It took them about 5 minutes, but eventually made their way down to the lobby, where greg gave them a tired wave, (Ivan briefly wondered if the man ever slept), and after an uneventful taxi drive Ivan found himself in the middle of a busy crowd, which seemed to be even more crowded than normal due to the crowd currently rushing out of the nearby theater.
"It seems we came to a popular one." Alfred joked as they pushed their way towards the building. "You know, it's only one of the most popular shows ever."
"Maybe we should have arrived earlier?" Ivan asked with a wince as a passerby trod on his foot.
"Dude, we're already thirty minutes early. Any earlier and we'd just be wasting time." Alfred said as they finally pushed their way into the building. As soon as they passed the door frame, they found themselves in a rather large lobby, and to Ivan's surprise, there were people dressed not only in formal wear, but more casual clothing as well. He couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at a couple who were wearing jeans in the corner of the room. Alfred, seeing his unimpressed look, followed his gaze in amusement.
"Something bothering you?" Alfred teased as he led Ivan deeper into the building, taking off his gloves and stuffing them into his jacket pocket.
Ivan let out an unimpressed hum. "I was under the impression that most people dress up to go to the theater. It seems wrong to be so…casual about it. Especially with the amount of money the tickets cost."
"I can't say I disagree, but it seems like that way of thinking is fading. Not that it bothers me, but I like dressing up for it. It kind of makes it feel a little more special. But what do I know, I'm just an old fart." Alfred said with a quick laugh. "It seems like times are leaving us behind again. We'll just have to adapt I guess. But anyways-" Alfred said, pointing to a nearby bar, "did you want to get a drink before the show?"
"I would not mind one." Ivan agreed.
As they wandered off to the bar, they failed to see the small group of men coming into the building behind them. Unfortunately, the same could not be said for the group, which consisted of Prussia, Germany, and Italy. The first to spot them was Prussia, who wasted no time in jabbing his brother in his side and openly pointing at the duo, who were currently chatting with the bartender.
"West! Look! It's them!" Prussia hissed loudly.
"Yes, I can see that." Germany angrily hissed back, quickly pushing his brother's hand down before anyone noticed them. "Don't make it so obvious!"
"Ve?" Italy hummed curiously, looking over in the direction Prussia had pointed at, only for him to turn pale when he spotted the two larger nations. "Oh no Germany! What are we going to do?! They'll kill us if they spot us!"
"Why in the hell would they kill us?!" Germany hissed, grabbing the other two nations and quickly dragging them towards the other side of the room so they wouldn't be noticed. "Is it illegal for us to go see a show?! Nein! It is not! No, we will see this show, keep to ourselves, and not bother them. Then we will leave, and then they will have no reason to bother us."
"But-" Italy tried to say, only for Germany to send him a stern glare, causing Italy to click his jaw shut.
"West! We have a golden opportunity here!" Prussia whispered excitedly, pushing his brother's arm off of him with a wicked grin. "This is the perfect time for us to see if the rumors are true! Hell, we literally have front row seats to the most popular topic of the century! Can you imagine how much one of the other nations would pay if we got pictures of them kissing or something?!"
Germany felt the vein is his head pop, and it took everything in him not to grab his brother's throat and chock the stupid out of him. "Nein! Nein, nein, nein, nein, NEIN! I will not have you doing exactly what France and Japan did and cause an international incident! Mein Gott, the paperwork alone would kill me!" Germany, scowling and eye twitching, leaned over into his brother's face and jabbed a finger into his chest. "If i so much as SEE a camera in your hand i will make you clean the bathroom for the next month!"
Prussia didn't say anything for a second, before he gave Germany a smirk. "Seems like a small price to pay for greatness."
"We're going to die!" Italy wailed.
"Idiots!" Germany said, pointing at the sign behind him. "You couldn't even take pictures if you wanted to! They don't allow phones to be out during the show!"
Looking up, the other two nations saw a large sign saying just that, and Italy let out a sigh of relief, and Prussia's face fell. "Oh, that's just not fair." Prussia grumbled, pouting as Italy hugged Germany.
"Thank goodness, I really thought we were done for." Italy said as he let out a sigh of relief.
"Enough, both of you. I don't want any funny business while we're in the theater. Do you understand?" Germany asked sternly.
"Got it!" Italy said, saluting Germany.
Prussia didn't say anything for a moment, before a smirk reappeared on his face as he pulled out a pair of mini binoculars out of his suit jacket. "I may not be able to get pictures, but I'll be damned if I miss this drama!" Before Germany could react, Prussia quickly broke away from the group and to the theater, cackling as he did so.
"Get back here!"Germany half said, half shouted as he chased after his brother, dragging along a now weeping Italy behind him.
_Ivan's Pov_
Thankfully, not only were they able to get their drinks before the show started, they were actually allowed to take them up to their seats as well. This worked well for Ivan, as he hadn't wanted to drink around strangers anyways, and with Alfred's connections they were able to get the box all to themselves. Alfred had made a joke about the secret service having a thing against other people sitting in the box seats with him, much to his own amusement. Ivan, who hadn't expected such a dark joke from Alfred couldn't help but laugh, much to Alfred's delight. There was still some time before the show started, so Ivan and Alfred were just casually commenting about this and that. Eventually, they fell into a pleasant lul, with both of them just sipping their drinks while watching the stage.
"You know, I never thought we'd ever get to this point." Alfred said suddenly, making Ivan glance over at him.
"To what point?"
Alfred gestured his free hand between them. "You know, here. I honestly never thought there'd be a day where we could just be… us. No nation drama, or political schemes."
Ivan hummed lightly in agreement. "There was a time I thought the same." Ivan admitted. "I hate to admit it, but perhaps our bosses were not as insane as we thought."
Alfred let out an unimpressed huff at that. "Oh please, they just got lucky and you know it. If this had happened thirty or fourty years ago they would have had to pry us apart so we didn't kill each other."
Ivan couldn't help but chuckle lightly at that. "I suppose you're right. It's strange how things can change so fast between us."
"I know right." Alfred said, placing his drink down and relaxing into his seat slightly. "You know, I was thinking about something."
Ivan turned to face Alfred, intrigued. "About what?"
Alfred didn't reply right away, as the lights had suddenly dimmed, throwing their small box into almost complete darkness, except for the small exit lights near their feet. As the music swelled, Alfred had to lean over slightly towards Ivan so he could hear him better. "You know, after this whole sleepover situation is over-"
Ivan couldn't help but let out a snort of laughter at that.
"Why don't I come over to your place sometime?"
Ivan paused, letting Alfred's words sink in for a moment as Alfred gave him a sincere smile.
"You…want to come over to my place?" Ivan asked, not quite daring to believe his ears.
"Well, yeah." Alfred admitted, still giving Ivan that sincere smile. "You know, for all those years spying on you, fighting with you, hell even just being around you I don't think i've actually seen much of your place. And well…" Alfred rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly for a moment before continuing, "I kinda want to get to know you better. I don't think a month is enough time to get to know Ivan. Hell, I don't think a year would be enough at this point. But, if you'd be up for it, maybe run it by your boss sometime."
"I-" Ivan said, legitimately lost for words. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah, a hundred percent sure." Alfred said. "You know, if we can talk our bosses into it, we can make it an annual thing. I do have fifty houses you know. I doubt you'd get bored. Plus…It would be fun!" Alfred said, beaming up at Ivan.
It was almost too much for Ivan's heart to take. Between his heart squeezing sharply at Alfreds smile and his face suddenly burning for some reason, he had to look away towards the stage so his heart didn't fall out of his chest. Thankful that the darkness hid his face, he took a few deep breaths before he answered Alfred, not daring himself to speak for a moment so his voice wouldn't betray what he was feeling.
"I would like that." Ivan admitted.
Alfred just beamed in response, copying Ivan as he also turned to face the stage. Picking up his glass, he lifted it towards Ivan. "It's a promise then?"
"Of course." Ivan replied, taking his own glass and clinking it against Alfred's.
As Ivan drank from the glass, he couldn't help but feel a small sinking feeling in his stomach. He didn't know why, but he felt like he was playing a dangerous game in this situation. As he slowly lowered his glass, he couldn't help but stare down at his reflection in the wine. While he wasn't sure what he was feeling, he knew that he shouldn't let Alfred know what was going on just yet. He took a calming breath, then letting it out he tried to ignore what he was feeling and tried to focus on the play. He'd figure it out later. It would pass. At least… he hoped it did.
_Meanwhile_
Germany was ready to kill his brother. There just wasn't any other way to put it. He was going to shove him over the balcony, let him break his neck, and then leave. He and Italy were watching the show, (well, Italy was watching the show), while his brother was watching the upper box seat on the right side of the room. Much to Germany's dismay, he hadn't been able to grab those damned binoculars from his brother, so he was forced to hear Prussia let out a "Ooo" and "Mein Gott" every other second. He would have snatched them out of his hand, but as the show was already going on, he didn't want to cause a scene. So he sat there, suffering. At least, he thought miserably as Italy let out a laugh and Prussia let out an "Oh my!", They were enjoying themselves.
Although… he couldn't help but glance up at the box seat from time to time. Though he had been trying to deny it, Germany had to admit that he was a little intrigued by the rumors floating around. It had been an interesting turn of events. So much so that the other nations barely spoke of anything else. Everytime he spoke to the other nations, someone always had a new update or theory. The last thing he had heard before he had come to the show was that someone had spotted Japan and France getting shit faced in a bar in brooklyn, much to his bemusement.
Not that he didn't feel a little sympathy for his old ally. But at least Japan would stop pining over America. Or… at least he hoped so. Cringing slightly, he decided to stop thinking about his friend's love life. Bleh. He didn't need those mental images. Returning his attention to the box seat, he could barely make out the outlines of America and Russia. He briefly wondered what they were talking about as he saw Alfred whispering something to Russia, but it was too dark to see Russia's reaction.
As he watched them, he couldn't help but let his mind wander over to the upcoming Christmas party. Most of the other nations, friendly or not, had been talking about it almost as much as they talked about the host of the party. He knew for a fact that most of the other nations, not wanting to miss out on the fun of gossip and showing off, as well as satiating their own curiosity had decided to stay in New York to stay close to the drama. In fact, some of the less frequent attenders had gone out of their way to attend for the sole reason of watching the drama. Hell, he even knew of some nations that didn't even celebrate Christmas asking to be the attending nations plus one's so they could see the drama unfold in real time.
Quietly sighing to himself, Germany forced himself to look away from the box and back at the stage. For once, he agreed with Italy. The further away they were from this mess, the better. It would do them no good to get involved. Of course, as soon as he thought this, he noticed a weak light shining from just next to his brother's leg. Curious, Germany craned his neck to see what it was, only to feel glare at his brother as he saw his brother texting some of the other nations about what was going on. Prussia, noticing his brother's unimpressed expression, just stuck his tongue out at him.
"You know west," Prussia whispered with a smirk when Germany kept giving him an unimpressed look, "Back in the good old days, it wasn't uncommon for nobles to go to the theater to show off and to gather information about other people's lives. I'm just carrying out an old tradition."
Germany, barely stopping himself from rolling his eyes, just went back to watching the play. It was his funeral, not his. Fuck it, he gave up.
_Ivan_
Much to his dismay, Ivan's odd feelings hadn't gone away as he had hoped. In fact, for some reason beyond his understanding, he found that the more he tried to ignore them the more they demanded to be acknowledged. It had become such a distraction that he had stopped watching the play, and instead had been blankly staring at the banister in front of him for a solid five minutes as he tried, and failed, to figure out what the hell was going on.
Glancing over at Alfred, he couldn't stop that damned stutter in his heart as he saw the other nation watching the play in front of them without a care in the world. As he watched Alfred chuckle at something that happened in the play, he couldn't help but feel conflicted. On one hand, he wanted to hold onto the younger nation and never let go, but on the other hand he wanted to run as fast as he could and never look back. The worst part was he didn't know what had caused him to feel this way in the first place. Frowning, he looked away again, watching the crowd beneath them with a worried twisting feeling in his stomach. He hoped that whatever was causing it would stop soon. He would be devastated if he did something and it ruined the new fragile friendship they had just built.
But when he looked back at Alfred, whose smile made the world around him brighten like the brightest star, he knew it was hopeless. The feelings weren't going to stop. Somehow, before he had realized it was happening, he had started to let Alfred into his heart. He didn't know when or why, but it had happened so slowly that he never had a chance to stop it. Desperately thinking back to all their previous days together, he honestly couldn't think of one moment where it started. Was it when Alfred had apologized to him for the first time? Had it been when Alfred called him a friend for the first time? When he complimented Alfred's smile? When they started to have honest conversations? When they had jokingly called each other by pet names?! When had that even started now that he thought about it?!
As these thoughts whirled around in his head, he suddenly remembered them cuddling on the couch together a few nights ago, and he felt his heart almost explode from the eruption of feelings that poured out. Suddenly feeling his face burn as though someone had put a blow torch to it, Ivan suddenly stood up. He wasn't sure why he did it, maybe it was the sudden burst of adrenaline, or maybe it was the sheer need to do something, anything to control his emotions. Regardless, Alfred sent him a confused glance. Beyond thankful for the lights being turned off, Ivan just muttered "Bathroom"to Alfred before he left the box, only stopping himself from running away until he was out of earshot of Alfred. Then he ran. He ran until he all but crashed into a bathroom, (thank god it was empty), and slammed the door behind him. He stood there, gasping for breath, until he just let out a sharp, hysterical laugh.
It couldn't be true. It just couldn't be. He was Russia! He and America had been fighting for the better part of a century! They couldn't stand each other! America and Russia hated each other! It could never work between them. But…but America was also Alfred, who got excited when he saw Ivan in the morning. He was Alfred, who loved cats and christmas. Who couldn't hide his joy when he found Ivan a perfect gift. Who loved snow because he could build things from it, who could still appreciate its beauty. Who asked for his hugs, who trusted him enough to tell him his secrets, who was just…just…so unapologetically himself. Who wasn't afraid of him.
He loved his laugh. He loved his smile. He loved how he pouted when things didn't go his way. He loved his excitement whenever something new and exciting happened. He loved how he made up excuses to hug him. He loved his kindness. He loved his need to help those around him. He loved his stupid jokes. He loved how he got embarrassed when he teased him about the past. He loved how he looked at him. He loved how he called his name. He loved his eyes, which brightened whenever they looked at him.
And as all those thoughts swirled in his head, he couldn't stop denying the truth anymore, as his heart and mind both seemed to scream at him, demanding he bow to them, demanding he confess what he had been denying them for so long.
He loved Alfred.
As soon as the words crossed his mind, Ivan let out another, higher pitch hysterical laugh as he backed into the door, before sliding down onto the floor and just staring off into space for a moment. He sat there, a weird feeling of joy and panic in his heart.
He was so screwed. Fuck.
A/N: Soooo…You guys aren't going to kill me for making this a two parter with a cliffhanger in the middle, right? Right? :D I didn't really close any plot points in this chapter, but I did finally deliver on the romance! Love is a wonderful, but sneaky thing. You'll do things, say things, and feel things for someone, until one day, it just knocks you off your feet. And it beats you up until you cry. :3
I'm not going to lie, this was a hard chapter to write. I'm so used to writing about friendships and avoiding romance in my short stories that I actually had to spend about three weeks just making like, 10 rough drafts until I had something that worked. Send help. I don't know what the fuck romance is.