The rise of the Black Rod
Chapter Two: A witch and a werewolf walk into a bar...
Hermione Granger heard her completely ordinary muggle doorbell go 'ding dong.'
She got up from the couch in her drawing room and went and answered the door, in her jeans and tracksuit jacket.
Standing on the front doorstep was a woman in a dress or robes, and hat with blonde hair; long wavy hair, facing away from the door.
"Hello?" said Hermione.
The woman turned and suddenly Hermione recognized it was Lavender Brown from school mostly because that her face and neck was a mass of huge scars.
Lavender said "can I come in please." quite mildly.
Hermione backed up a bit "Come on in Lavender" said Hermione politely.
Lavender waited until the door was shut before she said very nervously "I want a copy of the book."
Hermione blinked "what do you mean?"
"I want a copy of the brown book" said Lavender more forcefully.
Hermione blushed. "I'm not sure I know what you mean" said Hermione.
"Hermione" said Lavender "I'm dating Ron, I've heard about the book, I want a copy"
"He won't do the charms in the book" said Hermione bitterly.
Lavender disagreed "he will do the charms in the book" she literally growled.
Hermione's hair was just about standing on end for the sound.
She looked Lavender in her face and Lavender's eyes had turned yellow. Lavender coughed "Sorry Sorry" she said "to be a bitch about this."
"Lavender did you just make a Lycanthropy joke?" said Hermione.
"I might have" said Lavender "look, can we sit down, this is a bit awkward"
Hermione led Lavender back into the drawing room and waved at a couch. Lavender sat down on one of the dark blue couches.
"Nice" she said, looking around the room.
"Bought it from Harry" said Hermione.
"You bought this house from Harry" asked Lavender.
"Harry inherited it from his godfather" said Hermione.
Lavender sniffed "Doxies" she said.
"It used to be lousy with them" said Hermione.
Lavender sniffed again "Ron" Lavender said her eyes narrowing "You've had Ron here."
"Not for a long time" said Hermione defensively.
"Sorry sorry sorry I'm being" apologised Lavender,
"It's Ok lavender" said Hermione. "You can keep him."
"I can keep him" said Lavender "how gracious of you. The book?"
"It's not like I have a pile of them sitting around to sell" said Hermione.
"Well no" said Lavender "the rumour is yours is the best version of this book that there is,
Even the pure bloods are raving about it"
Hermione said "maybe I should get some printed?"
"derp de derp" said Lavender. "Honestly, you're supposed to be the clever one"
"So lavender you are ..."
"I'm a werewolf yes" said Lavender.
"Sorry" said Hermione.
"yeah well" said Lavender. "I'm more assertive now, though I do like steak more, and like it a bit… rarer that usual"
"So how's… work?" asked Hermione.
Lavender's hands formed fists "What bloody work. Nobody will bloody hire me." she said angrily.
"Lavender" said Hermione "Have you ever considered working for a publisher?"
"Books?" said Lavender.
"One book" said Hermione "I can't go chasing printers around. Working for Harry is a full time job."
"What do you do for Harry anyway? I would have thought Greengrass took care of his needs" said Lavender.
Hermione went red "Oh god no." she said "Harry pays me to be his proxy at the wizengamot, and work out how to vote on bills… basically all the being a wizengamot member business"
"You got a vote for getting an order of Merlin, though?" asked Lavender.
"Well, yes" said Hermione.
"So Harry's copying your homework still" said Lavender, with what might be a slight smile under her scars.
"He pays a salary" said Hermione. "Keeps me solvent."
"And you've got a town-house in Islington" said Lavender "Which does stink of doxies" she conceded.
"To you" said Hermione. "I can't smell it."
"Who's the wizard?" asked Lavender sniffing.
"None of your business Lavender Brown" said Hermione.
Lavender snorted; a deep almost growling sound.
"So, instead of getting a copy, I get a job organising copies." said Lavender.
"Three galleons a week" said Hermione. "And we should have a profit sharing arrangement."
"A what?"
"A share for you." said Hermione "We have a collective and call it…. Witches Aiding Greater Intimate Natures Association"
"WAGINA?" asked Lavender "You do realise that sounds an awful lot like ..."
"You aren't meant to spell it out" said Hermione, looking cross.
"Why don't we name it after a goddess" said Lavender. "Like Aphrodite"
"Athena" said Hermione.
"Aphrodite is the goddess of love" said Lavender.
"Athena is the goddess of wisdom" said Hermione "So Athena"
"Athena's also the goddess of military plans" said Lavender "Not what we're on about"
"Sorry, I didn't know that" said Hermione.
"We went to Italy and Greece, summer of fifth year" said Lavender. "Should be Aphrodite."
"Aphrodite Books, a women's collective" said Hermione
"It's a coven" said Lavender "Unless you wanted to hire muggles too?"
"Um… no" said Hermione.
"Aphrodite books, a coven owned business" said Lavender.
Hermione nodded "I like the sound of that"
"Any chance of the first month in advance?" asked Lavender "I'm a bit skint, had to borrow money from mum and dad."
Hermione rummaged in her jeans pocket, pulled out her beaded bag and got out a bag of galleons, and counted out twenty-eight.
-==0==-
Justin & Harry are sitting on Harry's office couches discussing the Ministry accounts. "My father says these make no sense" said Justin.
"Oh, we'll have to discuss this in person then" said Harry.
"My father is a little busy" said Justin.
Harry blinks. "He's busy is he, I'll come for dinner then" said Harry. "That's okay isn't it?"
Justin sighs.
Justin asked "About this black rod?"
"Well, show me and I can tell you quickly if Grandpa Sal was involved." replied Harry.
Justin pulled out the Black rod and held it, the lions head glowing silver.
Harry snorted "Not my family. That's definitely a Griffindor enchantment, I mean It's got a lion on it."
"You were a Griffindor" said Justin.
"You need to ask a historian" said Harry, shaking his head.
"Oh like Bathilda Bagshot" said Justin.
"She, ah, died in the war" said Harry. "Professor Lufkin at Hogwarts is an actual live history professor; go ask her"
"Lufkin?" asked Justin. "What if she's busy?"
"Well Owl her and organise a time. I expect you'll have to give her information in exchange; after all, she studies History." said Harry.
That evening as he gets ready for bed Harry is talking to Daphne about visit to Justin's father.
"You're planning to go somewhere without me, to meet someone important for a meal?" asked Daphne. "Leaving me with the children". The room began to chill down and Daphne's hair started to lift.
"Uh… I'll make sure we're both invited" said Harry quickly.
"You will need new clothes, and I'll need a dress" said Daphne "We can't turn up in Robes like hicks"
"Robes like hicks?" asked Harry.
"Father made me get a NEWT in muggle studies. My project was English non-magical aristocracy and their manners." said Daphne. "You remember our courting?"
"The Globe" said Harry.
"And we haven't been back since" said Daphne.
"I should book tickets" said Harry. "When for?"
"Our anniversary, the anniversary of our first date, my birthday… these are all dates" said Daphne.
"And we'd be out away from the family" said Harry.
"I'll wear my jeans" said Daphne.
-==0==-
Lavender Brown pressed the doorbell at Grimmauld place. Hermione, in half-done up Wizengamot robes lets her in
"Sorry Lavender I've got a session today and I find if wear the robes it helps me remember to go"
"You don't like the meetings" said Lavender simply "Hermione Granger never forgot going to any class ever, even when you were time travelling to get to three classes all at once"
"You knew?"
"Ron told me after I complained about you being so distant that year" said Lavender.
"Well the bloody meeting happens every month, usually on the twenty-second" said Hermione.
"Oh I'm really used to things that happen every month" growled Lavender, her irises flashing yellow.
"Oh, I suppose." said Hermione "How does that do with… you know, monthlies?"
"Two curses, both out of cycle with each other" said Lavender. "So every now and then, I get to be a werewolf with PMS."
"Oh" said Hermione.
"Ron is well broken in at being yelled at" said Lavender.
"Yes, his mother does go on a bit" said Hermione. Lavender looked at the ceiling. "I hate being locked up. The wolf hates it too. Ron's been buying me Wolfsbane potion, but it's really expensive."
Hermione sat fidgeting "There's a way… for Ron to help, but it's really difficult."
"I can be persuasive" said Lavender, not quite growling.
"Werewolves won't attack animals" said Hermione, "Unlike a real wolf, they're no threat to animals."
"I ate a chicken" said Lavender. "It was like eating KFC."
"A chicken?"
"We'd only just got my cage in the barn and one of the chickens got locked in with me" said Lavender "I woke up feeling like I'd binged on KFC. It was great."
"Oh" said Hermione "Well, if a person learns to be an Animagus..."
"Like McGonagall?" interrupted Lavender.
"Like Headmistress McGonagall" said Hermione "The werewolf doesn't attack them. Large animagus can play with a werewolf."
Lavender stared at Hermione "That is the most bizarre, esoteric werewolf fact in the entire universe. How the hell does even Hermione Grange know that?"
"Harry's father did it to keep his friend, Professor Lupin company. All Harry's fathers friends did it, while they were at Hogwarts."
"They learnt how to change into animals, while they were at Hogwarts?" asked Lavender "That's supposed to be very hard, and post-NEWT level transfiguration"
"Harry's dad and his friends worked hard and were, well some of them, really clever" said Hermione.
"So that's where he gets being able to just" Lavender waved her wand casually "And have things happen."
"His mother was superb at magic too" said Hermione "She discovered the runic sequence to protect babies from anything; even killing curses."
"There was a thing in the Prophet about that, an interview with Harry Potter and all the other surnames. I thought it was going to be more wank" said Lavender.
"He published the magic, family magic so every mum in England can do it." said Hermione "As long as you've done ancient runes."
"Eugh, runes" said Lavender.
"I'm glad I can talk to Daphne about this sort of stuff" said Hermione. "She likes Runes and arithmancy."
"Daphne call me Slytherin in her tight dress, all "I'm the queen" said Lavender.
"She's not like that at home, neither is Harry" said Hermione firmly "It's just an act so people can see what they expect"
Lavender rolled her eyes" And what are they like at home? All jeans and hoodies?"
"Slippers and casual robes mostly" said Hermione "Though Harry's mostly in trousers and a half robe."
"How middle class, they must be really letting the side down. Still, she has to put up with the moody impulsive git" said Lavender.
"Harry's not like that any more"
"So getting laid was all it took?" asked Lavender.
Hermione sighed "Harry had therapy. Lots of therapy."
"For what? Being excessively famous." said Lavender.
"The nightmares." Said Hermione, biting her lip "He couldn't really sleep well since first year, and it just got worse and worse."
"He had nightmares and couldn't sleep" said Lavender a bit sarcastically.
"Harry had to kill people… professor Quirrell didn't run away; Harry had to fight him." said Hermione. "Harry … well the therapy really helped him. I had it very bad after the war."
"Ron said you had a problem, yeah, but that it was sorted" said Lavender.
"It took the stick out of my bum too" said Hermione, sitting back casually.
"Yeah... you are a lot less… "
"Wound up" said Hermione.
"School Hermione would never had jokes about having a stick up her arse" said Lavender.
"Well, I had to make room for activities" said Hermione casually.
Lavender blinked "I… would not expect that joke"
"The charms make it… well… Wizards think they're being really naughty." said Hermione "A bit of lube is all it really takes"
"You let Ron do that to you, didn't you" said Lavender.
"I'm…. broad-minded" said Hermione. "Hygienic, but broad-minded, where Ron wouldn't do the charms… and we only had a physical thing by then…. So no more Ron."
Lavender sniffed "That wizard of yours comes around" she said.
"He's intelligent, well-behaved and surprisingly pleasant company" said Hermione "I'm not giving press conferences about him. Harry knows, Daphne knows, and I hope you keep your mouth closed when you find out. If you're walking down Diagon Alley and scent him, please don't react" said Hermione.
Lavender shrugged "Seems complicated" she said.
"I jumped into things with Ron… and we didn't last" said Hermione "What if this one doesn't last?"
Lavender snorted "They you find another. You're famous, titled and good-looking. Wizards will queue."
Hermione stamped her foot "I don't want a line of wizards, I want to know the one I've got is worth investing all my emotions into"
"Eh, that's not how it works" said Lavender. "You want him, he wants you, you're doing something with him… He clearly exercises your brain; that's all there is. Second guessing is how you ruin life."
"Well I had better go" said Hermione "ten hours of pointless digressions doesn't do itself"
"I uh, came to talk about the book. The publishers I've found won't print it." said Lavender.
"Oh" said Hermione. "Go to The Rookery and ask Luna Lovegood. She has at least one printing press; her father publishes the Quibbler."
"Loony Lovegood?" asked Lavender.
"She's …" Hermione held up both hands, one level, the other tilted. "This" she shook the level hand "Is ordinary people and Luna and her dad are like this", she crossed her hands so one was slightly off level "She touches reality in places. And has a kind nature. Neither she, nor her father would not print the book because of its contents."
"If you're sure..." said Lavender.
"Trust me, they're good" said Hermione.
-=0==-
"Where are we going to get respectable Muggle clothes?" asked Harry to Daphne over the sound of a horde of children eating breakfast.
"Harrods" said Daphne "It's off-the-rack, so we can walk in, find things that fit and buy. I've no idea where we'd get fashionable couture clothes from on that side of Diagon alley."
"The outside?" asked Harry, amused.
"You understand perfectly well" said Daphne.
In jeans, jerseys and trainers they braved London.
Harrods, was, Harry found fairly convenient. "I need a suit to wear to dinner with aristocrats" was translated into an hour of fussing and a singe-breasted suit from Italy, and shirt with suggestions about shoes. Harry bought a belt; he owned perfectly good handmade shoes.
Daphne had been watching with a small smile "Now, We'll get me a dress" she said, and they trolled to women's fashions.
"I'm having dinner with a Dutchess" said Daphne very aristocratically "And I have nothing to wear"
The assistant looked at Daphne "You really don't."
Harry waited for Daphne to hex the woman, and the inevitable call for Ministry Oblivaitors; but Daphne handed Harry her handbag; which Harry was fairly sure was a transfigured bat. And she simply said "Harry dear, How much can I spend?"
Oh. That old game, thought Harry "Well, keep it under a hundred thousand" he said "You can get couture if we decide to spend more time with them."
Harry turned to the Assistant "Please, we really do need to make a good, but not flashy impression. My colleague works for the Palace, and his father is a Baron. We simply need to go to dinner and blend in" Daphne was looking over the Assistant's shoulder at Harry and trying not to giggle.
Daphne got a sequinned gown in green that looked quite elegant, Harry thought. And shoes and a handbag. It looked, Harry mused like a muggle idea of her usual dress.
The assistant was actually surprised by Harry's credit card. "Oh" they said.
Harry left with Daphne on his arm, both holding bags of shopping "That was fun" said Daphne "Some of those other dresses are quite pretty. I might wear them around home."
-==0==-
Harry stepped out of the floo to 'Peebles Manor.' and tripped and fell on his face.
He got up, winced and cleaned himself with a wave of his wand.
"Never got the hang of flooing?" asked Justin, in a grey suit from a chair near the fire.
"Honestly, floo hates me, portkeys hate me" said Harry.
"You're dressed muggle?" asked Justin, standing up.
Daphne stepped out of the fireplace in a flare of green flames, her Green evening gown a tiny bit sooty. Harry vanished the soot with a flick of his wand.
"Sir Justin, you know my wife Daphne" said Harry.
"Lady Slytherin" said Justin with a bow.
"Oh, Sir Justin, on this side I'm just plain old Daphne Slytherin-Black-Peverell-Potter" said Daphne, a trifle mischievously, looking immaculate in a green gown and glittering strappy shoes.
"A glittering green dress." said Justin "Are you addicted?"
"It's a little thing I picked up" said Daphne.
Justin took Harry and Daphne though to a smaller, warmer coloured room where an older, portly man with brown hair and a woman sat, the man reading a ledger, the woman reading a newspaper.
"Mother, Father. Harry and Daphne ahem Sytherin-Black-Peverell-Potter" said Justin "My father, Lord Frances Finch-Fletchly, the Baron Peebles, and my Mother Lady Dorothea Finch-Fletchly."
The older woman took off her glasses and stood up "You've been calling them Lord Sytherin" she said.
"A courtesy title on our side of the fence" said Harry. "I'm not an actual aristocrat."
Daphne's lips twitched.
"Mrs Slytherin?" asked Dorothea "That's a nice gown"
"Just Harrods" said Daphne "We've no idea where to buy clothes here, so we went with off-the-rack, also time."
"Daphne's busy with her mastery in enchanting" said Harry. "Lots of work translating old spells, and my ancestors diaries"
"Well Harry helps with the bits that are… peculiar to the family" said Daphne with a small smile.
"The Prophet says you're running an orphanage" said Frances.
"I've adopted all the children" said Harry "They have trust funds, allowances, nurses… the younger ones have a school before Hogwarts"
"Slytherins School for Small Snakes" said Daphne "Harry's school. Mostly ours, a few boarders, some day-students." She looked over to Harry and winked.
"Well, if cook has managed we've got dinner in the dining room in fifteen minutes. Care for a drink?" said Frances.
Daphne shot Harry a look. Dorothea nearly smiled.
"Whenever Harry and I really let our hair down away from home, something terrible happens" said Daphne. "And he has a weakness for bucks fizz."
"I told you" said Harry, jokingly "I thought it was fizzy orange juice."
"Justin tells us you've given him some advice on finding… someone" said Dorothea.
"Generalities" said Harry "That's his own business."
"And Harry is, to quote his best friend, pants at dating" said Daphne. "Fortune smiled on me, so we're married."
"Fortune smiled on me" said Francis "I must remember that." Dorothea looked amused "So how long have you two been married?"
"Not long enough" said Harry "I've missed out on at least a year; I think since August."
"It's been a busy three months" said Daphne.
"Oh, can I see your ring?" asked Dorothea, and Daphne held out her hand; the goblins-silver armour glittering.
"An unorthodox ring?" asked Dorothea.
"A goblin wedding ring" said Daphne "Harry's family have had it for some centuries. It has some useful properties, as does the engagement ring."
"Its looks like armour" said Dorothea.
"There's a suit of armour to go with it, but that's a rental" said Daphne blandly "I… qualified to wear the ring, and it's very handy."
"So your wedding ring and engagement rings are both magical. It that common?" asked Dorothea.
"Well, some sort of enchantments on rings is common. But powerful magic on rings is rare. Very old pieces are prized more for their family connection than their magic. Wands work better and are general purpose. Though most wedding rings provide some protections, they're never removed, so they're convenient."
"Do you have your wand with you?" asked Dorothea.
"Harry, wand" said Daphne and Harry handed Daphne a wand from inside his suit jacket.
"I have a shoulder holster for wands. I can give you their card" said Justin.
"You have to rely on Harry to give you your wand?" asked Dorothea.
"If Harry's in trouble, I'm not much help" said Daphne "He's the most powerful wizard in Britain. If he can't stop it… he's either not paying attention, or I'm going to have to run."
"Daphne's glossing over that the last time we were attacked, she did most of the fighting and I just got tossed about like a chew-toy" said Harry. "Of the twenty-five, you got ahem… sixteen? Seventeen?"
"Oh Harry" said Daphne.
"Mother, you asked what you have to do to get an Order of Merlin, first class; that sort of thing" said Justin.
"That was Harry, not me" said Daphne. "Before I associated with Harry, nothing like that ever happened to me." Daphne handed Harry her wand and he pocketed it.
"But you helped in the emergency hospital" said Harry "And got a Hogwarts medal for it."
"Helping with the injured after the battle" said Daphne. "I was just keeping my sister safe during."
"And made the semi-finals of the European under twenty-one duelling open in your first attempt" said Harry.
"Duelling, with swords?" asked Francis.
"Spells" said Justin "Hardly the sort of thing a sensible Slytherin witch does."
"Slytherin witch?" asked Dorothea.
"Slytherin house at Hogwarts" said Harry "The ambitious, cunning guileful house. Recently more the house of blood-supremacists and bullies. We're cleaning that up."
"Justin, please do not mention anything negative Harry does not know about regarding Hogwarts." said Daphne quickly. "Harry will suffer, and I then will see that you get to spend many balls talking to lots of very old, boring men."
"Harry inherited some magical responsibilities" explained Daphne "If he finds out about a deficiency, it literally pains him till it is rectified. I've had to knock him out for a day before, and I hate doing that."
"He's cursed?" asked Dorothea.
"Technically a Geas, but yes" said Daphne. "His ancestor wanted to be sure his school stayed the best, and lasted. So far it's nearly a thousand years old. A Hogwarts student won the international Wizarding tournament; so probably still the best" said Daphne and air kissed at Harry.
Francis laughed "Oh well done… Daphne. It was Harry that won wasn't it?"
"First equal" said Harry.
"Well some drinks? We can probably rustle up bucks fizz." said Francis.
After a few drinks Harry said "And when my heirs are twenty-one, they can take the house rings, and do all the politics, and I can retire."
"Four houses, one heir for each. Teddy's Harry's godson and gets the Black seat. He's two already." said Daphne. "I'm looking forward to it."
"So you… need to have some children?" asked Dorothea delicately.
Daphne snorted "Had a lot of arguments with Harry while we were courting. I didn't want to. We found a solution. A bit of magic."
"Surrogates?" asked Dorothea.
"Shh the magic's a bit… it has a bad name" said Daphne.
"Oh muggles do it without magic. A medical procedure" said Dorothea.
"Well, something like that" said Daphne, and she nodded.
"You've got some already?" asked Dorothea "How?"
"While we were on honeymoon, the surrogates are being taken very good care of" said Daphne quietly.
"Aren't you worried Justin might mention it?" asked Dorothea.
"Justin can't hear us" said Daphne. "Privacy magic."
"No wand?"
"Magic" said Daphne and winked.
"Justin needs a wand for everything except telling the future" said Dorothea.
Daphne blinked "Justin can do divination. Well, Well, what a dark horse."
"Its it rare?" asked Dorothea.
"So rare, for years the class was taught by a complete fraud. We've got a much better professor now who can apparently read the future like today's newspaper." said Daphne.
"Oh, someone mentioned that to poor Harry" said Dorothea.
"Yes. And that the history teacher was useless. He was a ghost. Honestly." said Daphne. "They don't learn after death, or only very slowly."
"So your lot can see ghosts?" said Francis.
"And make them" said Harry "Muggles can't. It's a thing with someones magic tangling around their soul. A messy business."
"So your lot believe in souls?" asked Francis.
"We have a field of magic for magic on souls" said Harry "And I've seen limbo, if not an afterlife."
"Harry, maybe don't" cautioned Daphne.
"You put a page in the newspaper so witches could protect their babies the way your mother did" said Francis "Wasn't that giving up family magic?"
"Yes" said Harry "But I thought the benefit to society was worth it. And it helped for force the decriminalization of sacrificial magic. Mum would have gone to prison, had she lived."
"We didn't do that at school" said Justin.
"Beyond NEWT level runes and arithmancy" said Harry "Daphne can understand it, thankfully, I did neither. We didn't have classes in Ghoul studies or Necromancy either, but they're back."
"Is that what it sounds like?"
"Well, the course is theory only, but raising the spirits of the dead to talk to is very helpful. It can be very therapeutic." said Daphne.
"Is there anything magic can't do?" asked Dorothea.
"Bring back the dead, just resurrection" said Justin.
Harry shook his head "Sorry old bean. Been round that buoy a couple of times already."
Justin paled.
"That's how you survive the killing curse more than once" said Harry "You don't."
"So ... you've been dead" asked Francis.
"And if he does it again, I'd be very cross" said Daphne humorously.
"Yeah I ran out of return tickets" said Harry nonchalantly.
"What's the afterlife like?" asked Dorothea.
"I dunno. I was given the choice to come back or move on. I kept choosing come back" said Harry.
"That, mother and father is how you get an Order of Merlin, first class."
"Oh come off it, Hermione didn't, and she's got one" said Harry "So's Ron."
"Well, yeah, they just fought the entire government when he-who-shall-not-be-named took over. Didn't they break into Gringotts too?"
"That was a bad idea" said Harry shaking his head "Such a bad, expensive idea. The goblins fined me so much money."
"You broke into the bank?" asked Francis.
"A bank vault, and stole one thing, that was stolen goods anyway" said Harry "But, never again. The goblins are vaguely polite, well, to me and like Daphne. If that ever happened again, I'd get Daphne to go ask nicely."
"Ask Nicely?" asked Justin incredulous.
"I've got leverage" admitted Daphne "Harry, you could have used that heirloom as leverage"
"If I'd known!" said Harry.
Francis reached into his pocket and looked at his phone "Cook tells me dinner is ready." he said.
Over dinner Francis said "So, your little government, it levies the houses of Lords for revenue, like a Greek city state?"
"Yes" said Harry "For extraordinary expenditure."
"Which is every year now?"
"It's been a rough decade" said Harry. "Though we had windfall and found tons of gold in a box at the ministry. The goblins are still stamping galleons. They paid me off my demands."
"Demands?"
"A reward for this and that, and saving the country, my godfather's imprisonment without trial for eleven years." said Harry.
"How much?"
"Twenty-three million galleons" said Harry.
Justin coughed. "That's… a hundred million pounds."
"Conveniently, the box of gold was space expanded, the Ministry got many times that." said Harry.
Francsi interjected "The ministry just got a cash injection of how much ?"
"I think around a hundred million galleons" said Harry "All in ingots"
"Right" said Francis "Tell me, have prices changed since you were children"?
"Why would prices change?" asked Daphne "Sometimes there's a new way of making a potion invented, or a new spell, and things get cheaper, but mostly things cost what they did when I was old enough to notice prices"
"Does the ministry ever change how much services cost?" asked Francis.
"The floo bills change over time" said Daphne.
"We have a big hole in the budget for the floo network authority this year. Lots of modernisation needed" said Harry.
Daphne looked at Harry "You paid attention to finance?" she asked.
"I sometimes do" said Harry defensively.
"So… prices never change. Do salary's ever change?" asked Francis.
"Easy to find out in the ledgers; the salaries are listed every year" said Harry.
Francis went to get the book but Harry just pulled his wand and cast a summoning charm instead.
The book flew thought the dining room doorway into Harry's hands.
Everyone stared at Harry. "Habit" said Harry and looked in the front of the ledger. "Back in the eighties… we still paid three hundred to mid-level managers" said Harry "So, no, salaries don't change."
"You have a static economy and you just injected millions upon millions. What are you doing with it"?
"Mostly hiring builders to repair buildings" said Harry "It's hard, there are so few to hire we had to start a building company to get staff, and the ones we had put up their prices."
"Oh dear me" said Francis, putting his fork down. "This is going to end very badly."
Francis seized the salt shaker "This is your economy. A fixed amount of money, made by the goblins. Everyone with a share of it."
Harry and Daphne and Justin nodded.
"You just added… Francis looked in the ledger "Fifty times the Ministry's income of money."
"The ministry is rich" said Harry.
"Now prices for services that are in short supply are going up. And goods too, I suppose." said Francis.
"So?" asked Harry.
"Nobody except you has any additional money. People who can set prices for goods or services will put their prices up to get more money to buy scarce services." said Francis. "That... we call it inflation will flow across the economy, and people without the ability to charge more will be unable to afford, to start with, builders, eventually everything.
"Huh?" said Harry.
"The goblins haven't made galleons in a while, have they?" asked Francis.
"Ragnok implied they hadn't made them in a while, yes" admitted Harry.
"Head of the bank" explained Daphne.
"There used to be two things. A fixed number of galleons, and a fixed size of the wizarding economy; the value of all the things and services" said Francis, looking concerned.
"Okay" said Harry.
"Well now there are more galleons, but the economy's the same size. Remember muggle prices, they've gone up since you've been at school, for everything right" said Francis.
Harry nodded.
"Well there are lot more galleons in circulation now, so the effective value of a galleon drops. The more money you and the ministry spend, the more it drops, it shows up as inflation, which for your economy looks like maybe builders, and skilled services that people buy. You need to spend less, or more slowly to stop prices going up. Or better still, start another building company. That increases the value of the economy, so inflation stays near zero. Because… you lot live with zero inflation."
Francis thought for a bit "What stops people just… putting money in the bank and never spending it" he asked.
"That's what rich people do" said Daphne "Harry's spent all his reserves. All his families, and the Blacks, and the LeStranges, and the Slytherin vault."
"Wait a second" said Francis "Harry used to have how much?"
"Well… five million there, and all the LeStranges had" said Harry he said.
"How much was that?"
"I never asked" admitted Harry "Lots. Much more than I had."
"And how much of that money just sat in the vaults?"
"Well, all of it" said Harry.
"Doesn't the bank charge interest on deposits?" asked Francis.
"They charge more fees if you have less money" said Harry bitterly "For balances under a half million, you get lots of fees"
Francis pulled his own hair "This is crazy. You have no inflation, normally, no interest on deposits and the bank just charges fees."
"Yes" said Daphne "That's how it works."
"What about loans?" asked Francis.
"Of there's compound interest on loans" said Daphne "Father's always warmed me to never mess with borrowing from the goblins."
"They're good at debt recovery, I assume" said Francis dryly.
"Murderously good" said Harry.
"So you've just got, probably as much money as you had, and you're spending how much?"
"Millions" said Daphne "Just so far this year, two and half million on builders."
"Builders are expensive then?"
"Three hundred galleons a square yard for single-story stone building" said Harry "I remember, because … Arthur Weasley, my friends father works for the ministry and makes three hundred a year."
"So a yard costs a years salary. Is that higher than it used to be?" asked Francis.
Daphne shook her head "Sounds about right" she said.
"But that's insane, if people only earn one yard a year, how can anyone buy buildings."
"They cost a lot to build, but there's a glut right now, a house only costs fifty thousand or so." said Harry.
"That's over a hundred years earning for a government employee; is he very junior?"
"Head of a small department" said Harry offhandedly. "I know he built his own house though."
Dorothea cleared her throat "Would anyone like dessert?"
"Having someone build your house as a luxury good!" said Francis "Your economy is insane!"
"Well anyone can make a house" said Harry "It's just transfiguration and some charms. Builders are just a time-saver really."
"And make things that don't need magic to hold themselves up" said Daphne. "Or can resist being attacked with magic" she mused.
"What?" asked Justin.
"Oh, all the old manors are practically indestructible" said Daphne. "Poor Susan, her family were wiped out but the house is still there."
"My family's manor burnt down" said Harry glumly "Must have been a bit lacking in protections"
"Or experts wrecked it" said Daphne.
"So your luxury buildings are essentially permanent. That makes some kind of sense" said Francis.
Justin took the plates and piled them on the sideboard and handed out dessert plates.
"Once all this craziness is over" said Harry "I'm looking forward to sitting back with Daphne and watching the children do everything, and theirs, for another hundred and fifty years or so, with any luck"
Francis looked up "Time… time... It's all about time. How long does it take to make a house yourself?"
"Well, months and months" said Harry. "If a builder does it, you can do something else."
"It's time" said Francis. "That's what you've all got so much of. Time. Builders are expensive because you can all afford to trade time to build yourselves. Are there building regulations?"
"What's that?" asked Harry.
"I'll take that as a no" said Francis.
"So getting someone else to build for you is a luxury good because any witch or wizard can do it, so you're buying pure convenience and speed." said Francis. "And your massive wealth inequality only matters for very few things, like buying luxury goods"
"Inequality?" asked Harry
"You've got about seventy thousand years of average earnings" said Francis.
"Harry's a lot poorer than his brother-in-law" said Daphne "As my sister reminds me"
"There are people richer than that?" asked Francis.
"The Malfoys" said Harry "Old Lucius Malfoy used to own the old Minister for Magic, could get anything he wanted. He supported Voldemort, and is now in prison."
"How much richer?" asked Dorothea
"Hundreds of millions" said Daphne.
"Their Manor is pretty damn huge too" said Harry "Four or five stories, hundreds of rooms, and Draco still moaned about maintenance costs, though my acre of lead roofs costs about fifty thousand a year in maintenance. I think he's got maybe two acres."
Francis shrugged "They have a billionaire, effectively. Do the Malfoy's own a lot of everything?"
"Sort of" said Daphne.
"They have as much money as the government. It's to be expected" said Francis, dishing out some gooseberry fool.
"So I should be careful spending money?" asked Harry.
"The Ministry should cut spending, and try to only spend money on that it has to" said Francis. "Or you'll get more inflation, and your society won't cope."
"What would go wrong?" asked Daphne.
"A permanent underclass who couldn't afford to live anywhere" said Francis.
"Oh we have that" said Harry "People got evicted from their houses, were put in camps during the war. They live in abject poverty if they can't get a wand."
"No wands?" asked Francis "Aren't they expensive?"
"Seven galleons" said Harry.
"Well, if you wanted to help, make sure all those poor people with no wands get wands, and somewhere to live"
"But builders are really expensive" said Harry.
"Well wands at least" said Francis.
"There's only one good wand-maker ion the country, and he was tortured in the war" said Harry. "He might have enough wands to give everyone one. He does have a lot of stock."
"Tons of it" said Justin.
"Harry, everyone wand-less?" asked Daphne. "Do you know where there are some?"
"Burnt up in the war" said Harry. "And while I personally have a very few spares, they're for family."
"Heirlooms" said Francis.
"Well, wands don't work like that" said Justin.
"Those wands are literally for family" said Harry "Not like Olivander wands at all."
"How many could that be?" asked Francis "There are only twenty thousand magical, so in the worst case, only a few hundred thousand galleons."
"Well, Olivander does also knows what wand everyone had" said Harry "I'll send him a bank draft, get someone… huffelpuffy to round up the wand-less and get them wands."
"They'll need temporary accommodation" said Justin.
"They're mostly living in flophouses in Knocturn Alley" said Harry "According to a social worker I know"
"You know a social worker?" asked Dorothea curiously.
"Where I find my staff." said Harry "The ones I can give jobs to."
"Is there a bigger medal than an Order of Merlin, first class?" asked Francis "Because you seem to be a very public-spirited fellow, Harry"
"There's not" said Daphne.
"Time" said Francis "If all the homeless with new wands built houses, they'd build houses really quickly."
"Well, yes" said Daphne "But where?"
"Where did they used to live?" asked Dorothea. "If their houses were destroyed, they can rebuild there"
"A lot of peoples property was just taken" said Harry.
"Ah, a good old land-grab" said Francis. "You said there's a glut of property?"
"Manors with huge grounds" said Daphne. "We'd want lots of small properties."
"A few manors, demolish or re-purpose as public buildings, and lots of houses" said Francis "Gosh I feel like a revolutionary."
"For a fiscal conservative who works for the exchequer you're a remarkably radical man" said Dorothea affectionately.
"Different country, and they've just had a civil war" said Francis.
"Um, my friend Hermione's been making money buying land and selling it back on the muggle side as farmland" admitted Harry.
"Oh, land arbitrage. She's a clever one" said Francis. "But really, get the Ministry to buy the wands and land, and set up some public services, there could be a new town."
"Wouldn't it be a slum?" asked Justin.
"If it was done non-magically" said Francis, eyes gleaming "but you lot can do anything with enough wands"
"It's never pass the Wizengamot" said Daphne "The conservatives would never touch it. I mean father, not the dark ones."
"Yeah" said Harry.
"Well do it yourself" said Francis "It's only half a million. At the end of that, you can have your own town, with taxes, or vassalage, if you want to be medieval."
"I have vassals already" said Harry "After the war, a number of the dark family's swore vassalage."
"Well make them build villages" said Francis "Why Vassalage?"
"It was that or die" said Harry "I was angry, they kept attacking me."
"Like when twenty-five werewolves attacked us one day in our gardens" said Daphne.
"How exactly haven't you just burnt this all to the ground?" asked Dorothea.
"Harry's a very forgiving man" said Daphne "And wants peace."
"So, consider making your own town. You don't trust your existing vassals, so ignore them" said Francis.
"I can't organise that" said Harry "I've got a secretary worked off her feet. And I've go things to do."
"Well, hire someone. Justin, suggestions?" asked Francis.
"Ernie MacMillan" said Justin "He's trained to take over the family business, but his Dad's not interested in stopping."
"And your best friend" asked Daphne.
"I know him. He was in the DA with Harry." said Justin.
"DA? That was the illegal resistance organisation"? Asked Francis.
"Well yeah" said Harry. "Okay… I'll need his address."
"I could um… get that all started" said Justin "It's only a letter and you're quite busy"
"Harry looked at his empty dessert bowl "So. Today I learned I can't spend my money, unless I do it buying all the wand-less wands, land to live on and making them vassals?"
"Good summary" said Francis "You need to ensure the Ministry doesn't go on a spending spree, except on things that are already costing too much in maintenance"
Daphne laughed briefly "Father would take that and make a banner of it for his office."
"That second school of yours, expanding it to teach the new town, you'd better think about that." said Dorothea.
"Is there anything you lot can do with a wand to make money" said Francis.
"Well, make things" said Harry.
"Is there something nobody makes that would sell" asked Francis.
"Carpets" said Daphne. "Magic Carpets are banned here because of the Big Broom lobby"
"I like brooms" said Harry.
"But Carpets. We could export carpets of we made enough" said Daphne.
"We'd need… what goes in a carpet?"
"Wool, or silk" said Dorothea.
"Oh dear" said Harry "I have a very bad idea."
"What is it dear?" asked Daphne frostily.
"Well, Hermione's been selling acromantula silk to fund her house" said Harry.
"That would take so many wands" said Justin "Those things are dangerous"
"What are those?" asked Dorothea.
"Giant spiders. The silk is very valuable because it resists wear and takes dye well" said Daphne.
"You know silkworms used to be cultivated in England, bit it was too labour-intensive to unwind the cocoons" said Dorothea.
"How big are silkworms?"
"Tiny, inch long" said Dorothea.
"Silk carpets" said Harry. "Nobody makes them, anyone can do it with a little training, and no risk of injury. So good for women, pregnant or just with children."
"Build a town and make silk carpets" said Justin "I can just tell Ernie, he can owl you for anything"
"Why are we doing this?" asked Daphne.
"To save all those poor witches and wizards without wands" said Dorothea.
"Oh yes" said Daphne. "Harry?"
"Okay" said Harry. "Get Ernie to do all the research."
"He can ask Cho" said Justin. "Her family will know someone"
"They're from Inverness" said Harry rolling his eyes. "She's Scottish Chinese."
"You did date her very briefly, didn't you" said Daphne stiffly.
"Terrible dates, bad idea" said Harry.
"Well, Harry, your takeaway from this is to prevent the Ministry spending too much money, and have Ernie.. MacMillan build a town so the disposed have somewhere to go."
"Well this has been a very odd dinner" said Harry honestly.
"We'll have to visit your house sometime" said Francis.
"Oh, you might not want to" said Daphne "There are always at least twenty children under eleven running around"
"And why exactly did you do that?" asked Dorothea.
"Honestly, the leader of the terrorists; he grew up in an orphanage" said Harry. "And I had a rough childhood too. Better to have a vault for their education expense and anything I can manage.
"We have to get them started with Quidditch" said Daphne. "Or something fun with teams"
"Under twelves?" said Francis "You want something five-year-olds can do"
"Hmm, how about simple playground games?" asked Francis.
"That sounds… doable" said Harry. "Hopscotch, running races. If we had a pool, we could have swimming."
"We do have a pool" said Daphne.
"It's in the Bahamas" said Harry.
"And they could go and learn to swim" said Daphne.
"It's a bit wild" said Harry. "Memo, we need a swimming pool for the children"
"Ahem!" said Daphne "I haven't been able to swim since I moved in."
"We need a pool" said Harry. "I'll make one."
"Oh, That would to be fun to watch" said Justin.
-==0==-
Ernie MacMillan wrote one letter, outlining costs for various properties. Daphne read it "He's a good manager." she said "It's like dealing with your lawyer, only cheaper."
A day later, Olivander started issuing wands to the wandless.
Harry went out on the grounds of Potter Manor, found a vacant bit of lawn and started transfiguring.
The hole was easy, turning it to stone merely a little time-consuming. Stone surrounds, and a wall of spikes and it was sort-of done.
"You know, using transfigured spikes for the fence is quite creative" said Daphne, then she transfigured a patch of the spikes into a tidier fence. "You conjure some water, I'll do the walls"
"Walls?"
"I want a covered pool" said Daphne. "And heated"
Harry switched wands and turned the spikes into a growing glittering dome over the empty pool, the dome slowly filling in with glass and metal frames.
"Why a Dome?" asked Daphne.
"Because… it looks cool" said Harry. They stopped for lunch.
After lunch, one of the child minders pointed out that real pools have filtering and heaters. Their father apparently made pools; though very few.
An owl sent, Harry and Daphne went back to translating spells and journals.
The next day Daphne said "Harry, it's nearly Halloween"
"I hate Halloween" said Harry simply.
"The children, Harry" said Daphne.
"Can have Samhain" said Harry.
"Well, that's a lot of work"
At this point Harry got a howler from jjones about Hogwarts having Halloween instead of Samhain.
"THEY'VE MADE IT A MUGGLE HALLOWEEN INSTEAD OF A MAGICAL SAMHAIN" it yelled, then burnt.
"Something you and jjones see eye to eye on" said Daphne, amused, though many of the smaller children were screaming.
Harry cast Slytherin's silence explosion spell. Some of the small children looked at Harry incredulously, and tried to scream, and heard nothing. A couple of them stopped trying to cry.
"It works?" asked Daphne "On crying children. Truly powerful magic."
"Should have used it on the Howler" said Harry "Send jjones a Howler immediately "You made the infants cry you imbecile"
"Why me?"
"Because you'd enjoy it more" said Harry. "And I never learnt how."
"So Halloween"
"Okay" said Harry, and stood up
"We're going to have a big party for Halloween, just like the big kids at Hogwarts" said Harry.
-==0==-
"Beating a walking piñata troll with beaters bats is not a traditional Halloween observance" said Daphne.
"It's going to be a team thing. Teams of three" said Harry.
"Ugh!" groaned Daphne sarcastically.
Harry did it in the front hall of Potter Manor with all the children and supervisors.
The children loved it. Harry conjured up piñata Trolls, and handed out conjured bats.
"Now teams of three, and whack the troll" said Harry, face stuck in a massive grin.
The adult supervision (not Harry) made sure the children didn't wallop each other.
After the piñata trolls were all defeated, Harry stood up and told the story of the first Halloween troll, with exaggerated actions.
"So I was in my first year at Hogwarts when a Troll came in on Halloween" said Harry, and he danced around, pretending to be a big troll.
"My friend Hermione, who was a very quiet little girl" Daphne rolled her eyes at this
"Was hiding in the toilet" Harry crouched down and put his arms over his head.
"My friend Ron and I ran after the troll" said Harry and made pantomime running motions.
"The troll went into the toilet and was smashing things with the trolls club" said Harry, and conjured a big light club and waved it around, pretending to smash things.
The children, who'd all walloped a piñata troll by now were watching intently.
"And I jumped on the troll and tried to poke it with my magic wand." said Harry, and he shook his head "Don't do that!"
"My friend Ron had just learned to levitate things that day, because my friend Hermione told him how." said Harry, and he drew his wand; and dropped the conjured large club on the ground
"So he swished and flicked and said wingardium leviosa, and the club" Harry swished and flicked 'wingardium leviosa' "Floated up out of the mean trolls hands" Harry dipped his wand, and the club bopped the ground "And bopped it on the head, and knocked it out, and we were all best friends ever after."
Harry paused "Never do that" he said "Run to find an adult, and tell them, and they can come and put the troll to sleep safely, and take it away to a wild forest or mountain where trolls can run about being trolls and frighten nobody."
With that, Harry conjured a huge, lifesize realistic troll. "That's how I remember my mountain troll"
'Somnus' Harry cast and the troll fell over and snored comically. "Much safer for everyone" said Harry, and vanished all the beaters bats, and the troll and the troll club.
The children cheered and clapped.
Daphne walked over "Are you going to tell this story every Halloween?" she asked.
"Well, sometimes before the piñatas. Sometimes I might put sweets in the piñatas too." said Harry cheerfully.
"Everyone!" said Daphne "Our Halloween party starts at teatime, and we'll have conjured costumes"
"Forty-two?" asked Harry.
"Princess, witch, queen" said Daphne. "Three choices."
Harry scratched his chin and said "We need some pictures. I can't conjure from nothing."
-==0==-
'Troll fighting witch' was a very popular costume.
Harry had conjured up some life-size dummies.
Wizard, quidditch player, old fashioned wizard, knight, prince, Dragon tamer; which looked like Charlie Weasley, and curse-breaker; which just looked like Bill Weasley..
The boys and some girls came over and Harry conjured costumes for them.
Harry smiled a lot when one of the girls wanted to be a curse-breaker, and got the same outfit as the boys, but with a big pair of wings. "My friend the curse-breaker, his wife's a curse-breaker too. That's how they met. She's very brave, and has wings when she wants to."
Daphne looked up at this "Harry!" she said, and shook her head. "Making a Fleur Delacour fan club among the children"
"She's pretty amazing" said Harry.
"Queen" said little Agatha, who was three. Harry conjured up a small green crown, and a green robe for Agatha to put on. "Daphne" said Agatha. Harry nodded "My Queen" he said.
Daphne had just made Delpha, the oldest girl another Trollhunter outfit. A Hogwarts robe, and a lightweight club.
After the feast Harry stood up "Well, everyone except" Harry checked his piece of parchment "Delpha, Corine and Keiran, that's dinner over. You three, come with me, we're going to do something extra.
Delpha, dressed as a trollslayer, Corine, in a very pointy witches hat, and Keiran, in a wizards hat, followed Harry nervously down to the front hall.
"You three will be at Hogwarts next year at Halloween. Don't try to have dangerous adventures, please." said Harry. "I didn't have parents to care, but I try. Now, we're going to do the troll thing again, but with a bigger troll, and wands.
"We can't do magic yet" said Corine "We don't know any spells"
Harry conjured three wands "These are conjured wands. I'm putting an animation charm on them." sad Harry, conjuring a life-size Trolls' club.
"Oh" said Delpha.
Harry puttered about getting the animation charm to work. "Now all three of you, lift at once?"
The children lifted their wands carefully and the club jiggled and lifted.
"Good" said Harry, hearing Daphne approaching. "Before Daphne gets angry, this is going to be a conjured troll. It's not really a troll, so don't worry about it. I'll animate it to move around a bit, but that's all."
Harry conjured a lifesize troll, using his memory of his troll as a template.
The troll stood, a giant dummy.
Harry cast an animation charm on the troll and it started to walk on the spot.
Harry waved his wand backwards and the troll walked back away from the nervous ten-year-olds.
"Trolls, dangerous monsters are scary" said Harry, and with a flick, the troll walked forward and grabbed the club.
"Now, all pull it up" said Harry, as he felt a wand poke his back "You go easy on our kids or I'll hex you" said Daphne softly.
The children pushed their dummy wands up and the troll lost it's grip on the club.
"Down Now!" Corine called and the club shot down, braining the conjured troll, which with a flick Harry's wand, fell over.
"Well done" said Harry. "But what should you do instead?"
"Get an adult" said Keiran bashfully.
"Now, as Daphne's here, I can show you why" said Harry, and vanished all the conjured things.
"A wall to keep in a troll Daphne" said Harry.
Daphne walked hastily to the children and took them over to the Study door, turning, she transfigured a circular wall of spikes out of the floor.
"Transfiguration" said Daphne "Hard to learn, but worth it"
Harry drew his white wand and summoned a troll. A real, fourteen foot mountain troll.
"Gragh!" roared the troll, lifting it's small tree.
Harry transfigured the tree into a chain that wrapped the troll up. "Graah!" groaned the troll in surprise.
"Troll disarmed and immobile" said Harry simply.
The Harry stunned it. It fell over like a tree, with an immense thud.
"Never try that" said Harry, "Trolls are magic resistant, it's almost impossible to stun one. My chain will stop it though. And it's made from the tree, which isn't magic resistant at all."
Harry then vanished the chain and banished the troll back to where it had come from.
"That's how a powerful adult does it. As children; levitate the weapon. Preferably run." said Harry, and reversed the transfiguration on the wall of spikes.
"Why does it smell" asked Keiran "The other trolls didn't"
"I summoned a troll. That was a real troll, not a conjured troll" said Harry, and scourgify'ed the floor.
"You don't want us fighting trolls" said Delpha.
"I hope the only fighting you ever do is learning to duel" said Harry. "Come on, it's time for you three to wash up and get ready for bed"
"Will you be very cross if I fight something" asked Delpha.
"Delpha, you're a Black by blood" said Harry to the little blonde. "You'll probably fight something or someone. Try not to get in fights, and if your detention record is worse than mine, you will be grounded." said Harry. "And you have to get an E in flying. That's all I ask. I'm not having witches from the house of Black not able to fly like a bird."
"But you din't care about me" said Corine.
"Corine, you have big shoes to fill. You're the Second Potter to turn up at Hogwarts. You'll be judged against Delpha, but you just be you. People will say "Oh the Potter sisters." That's both of you. I want you to be happy. Delpha has to be a Black later ; because we've run out. You can be anything. But you have to be 'a Potter sister'; except you'll get sorted first. Delpha hasn't worked that out yet."
"But I'm older!" cried Delpha.
"And C comes before D" said Harry "So you're the second Potter sister. Keiran gets sorted last of you three."
"What If I went as Delpha Black!" said Delpha.
"Well I think you're going to be sorted into Slytherin" said Harry smiling "Because that's pretty smart."
"But I could go as a black too" said Corine thoughtfully.
Daphne laughed. "My big brother was in Ravenclaw, I was in Slytherin, and so was my little sister. You've got everyone else from here at Hogwarts already as big bothers and sisters. You can decide how you want to be called; but you're always Slytherin-Black-Peverell-Potters no matter what.
"How do you get so many surnames, Harry?" asked Kerian.
"Mostly by thinking it would be good to inherit my lost family's treasure" said Harry with a laugh. "Mostly I got was unpaid bills, and arguments with Daphne" he said.
"You two never argue" said Delpha.
"We do, but we've been married three months. We're still really gooey about each other" said Harry, taking Daphne's hand and kissing it.
"You kissed her hand!" said Keiran "My parents never did that."
"Well, it's an old-fashioned thing for parties" said Harry, pulling on the hand he hadn't let go and holding Daphne "Now be warned, adults being smoochy" said Harry, and kissed Daphne, who was on the verge of laughing, on the lips… for a while.
"Oh… that's like my mum and dad kissing at Christmas" said Keiran.
"Come on, you've seen learnt how three children can fight a troll, now we're all going to bed" said Harry.
"Did Harry really fight a troll" asked Delpha.
"Today, and in first year" said Daphne. "Please don't. Headmistress McGonagall will tell me it's all Harry's fault for being a bad influence on you all."
"Do you talk to the Headmistress?" asked Corine.
"We own a quarter of Hogwarts. We talk to the Headmistress" said Daphne. "And I hardly got any detentions ever, so I'll be watching."
"And Daphne's grades were much better than mine, so be warned." said Harry.
"But you're famouser" said Keiran as they walked up the stairs to the third floor where the children slept.
"Mostly for things I didn't want to do" said Harry "Fame isn't everything. Family's much better."
"Now, clean up and go to bed" said Harry, and strolled down to his bedroom with Daphne.
"We're going to have an argument" said Daphne calmly.
"Oh, about what?"
"Whether we have Yule or Christmas" said Daphne.
"Yule, no contest" said Harry. "Presents, some neat old traditions and no muggle commercial stuff"
"Mmmm" said Daphne "But I've only had Yules, what If I want a Christmas?"
"Well, I suppose that means we're having Christmas then" said Harry.
"Don't be silly. We're not having a Christmas" said Daphne "I'm not having Christian stuff in my house. They burnt witches."
"I never did any Christian stuff with Christmas, just cooking, and finally at Hogwarts eating." said Harry. "It's… like Yule without a Yule log and shorter."
"I'm not sold on it. We'll stick with Yule" said Daphne. "And you can do a big explanation of the difference"
"And you can explain why you won't have Christian stuff in the house" said Harry.
"And we can go to sleep" said Daphne, the bedroom doors opening as she walked toward them.
"Why do they open for you, but not for me?" asked Harry.
"Because I'm coming to your bedroom and that's a big deal" said Daphne.
"Buts it's your bedroom too" said Harry, confused.
"The door opening charms don't know that" said Daphne.
"Is it just a charm"? Asked Harry.
"No silly, it's the elves" said Daphne, laughing. "Mandy thinks I need the doors opened for me. She thinks I'll be carrying a baby."
"Not yet" said Harry, closing the bedroom doors.
"May sometime" said Daphne. "What's May like in Australia?"
"Um… the opposite… so… autumn?" said Harry.
"Night Harry" said Daphne.