The rise of the Black Rod
Chapter Five: A big family Not-Quite-Christmas
"Harry, Dear?" said Daphne, combing her hair before bed.
Harry looked across the bedroom, one foot awkwardly half-out of his trousers, his green boxers with pink hearts on tangled up on his right knee. "Yeah?"
"Can we have everyone to dinner?" she asked, and sighed gently "Black Manor's nearly habitable now, the dining room's so big we'll be able to have everyone to dinner. And the children need to get used to big dinner parties."
"Erm" said Harry, and tugged his foot out of his trousers, straightened his boxers and folded his trousers over the trouser-press. If none of the elves got overexcited, he might be able to wear them again tomorrow. He wondered what 'everyone' meant?
"When you say everyone, you mean?" asked Harry.
"Mummy and Daddy, Andromeda, Teddy, the children, some minders, a few of your friends, perhaps, … and my sister and her husband" she added more quietly.
Harry closed his eyes and cleared his mind. Not getting angry. "I suppose" he said.
"She's my sister" said Daphne. "And he's your cousin anyway."
Harry chose not to argue. "What date?" he asked instead.
"We could do new-years eve?" said Daphne. "A family party, child-friendly."
"Child-friendly?" said Harry, not knowing what that meant.
"Not enough booze for everyone to get plastered and start snogging in the hallways." said Daphne.
"The Blacks and Malfoys" said Harry.
"Effectively." said Daphne, putting her hairbrush down and turning to smile at Harry "You don't mind, do you?" she said breathily, and fluttered her eyelashes at him. Harry snorted. "Ham" he said.
"Do you think the house will be ready for a party by the end of the month?" asked Daphne, more normally.
Harry thought about the roof that had collapsed at Yule, the plumbing that was clearly literally cursed, and the dry rot in the southern side of the third floor the builder had found last Wednesday. "I'll ask tomorrow" he hedged. He was fairly sure the building would have a roof and no lethal holes in the floor by then.
"Oh good" said Daphne "We can drop by for a swim, then you can talk to the builders."
"Another swim?" asked Harry.
"Swimming is good exercise, and I like swimming with you." said Daphne. "We should start jogging again."
"Jogging?" asked Harry.
"I know the last time we went for a walk in the grounds it was a bit of a disaster" said Daphne.
"Understatement of the century" muttered Harry, getting his pyjamas out from under the pillow.
"I had an idea about that. We could have some small buildings on the grounds – to use as emergency shelters – and somewhere to stop of it rains." said Daphne "They could be follies."
"Follies?" asked Harry.
"Cute little miniature castles, teensy towers, that sort of thing" said Daphne. "The Parkinsons have a mini monastery behind the duck pond. Somewhere to put outdoor furniture, and retreat to if a picnic gets rained out."
"So you played there as a little girl?" asked Harry.
"And teenagers find them useful" said Daphne blandly.
"Not too close to that Topiary" said Harry.
"What were they thinking?" asked Daphne, lifting one eyebrow.
"I have no idea." said Harry. "A way to get rid of unwanted house-guests?"
"Hmm. But what if the werewolves were inside the shelters?" asked Daphne.
"Blood locking the doors" said Harry.
"Quite" said Daphne, and she stood up, and went to the bed, throwing her dressing gown onto her stool, revealing a tight silk night-gown.
"That's new" said Harry, swallowing.
"Well, I can't wear the same nightgown every night." said Daphne. "Blood locks?" she asked, one eyebrow raised.
"Learnt about them at Hogwarts" said Harry dismissively. Daphne turned down the bed, and slid in, then slid uncontrollably across the bed to bump against Harry "Slides well on the sheets" giggled Daphne.
Harry leaned down and kissed Daphne's hair "Why, you're right here" he said "should I give you a push?"
"Don't, I might fall off the bed" said Daphne.
"So a slow, gentle pressure then?" asked Harry. Daphne blushed a little.
"I'll skip the pyjamas then?" asked Harry.
"I think for safety's sake I have to take this off" said Daphne. Harry growled playfully.
"I am trying to maintain some standards" said Daphne "What if one of the children came in?"
"We have over a dozen childcare workers, working in shifts, and I'm not sure the doors aren't locked by the elves." said Harry.
"What if Teddy'd had a nightmare?" asked Daphne practically – while also shimmying the hem of the nightgown up her legs.
"Then we'd hide under the sheets" said Harry "And you can always summon things, unless you took off your wedding ring."
Daphne threw the nightgown off the bed "But I'd feel naked without it" she said playfully.
"Funny coincidence" said Harry, and he slid onto the bed.
-==0==-
Harry woke up, got dressed, kissed Daphne's hair as she sat at her dresser and went to see about breakfast.
The house-elves had put out the chafing dishes and things, and a few of the staff were eating. Harry sat down at the head of the table and looked at his place setting. A small pile of mail awaited him.
Harry eyed the letters, and judged the distance to the toast rack. He drew his wand and banished the mail to the study, and summoned a piece of toast. 'Marmalade,' thought Harry.
Daphne, humming melodically, walked into the dining room a piece of toast and half a cup of tea later, wearing a cream jumper and jeans. Harry followed the sight of approaching wife.
"Morning" she said, smiling at Harry. Harry felt a grin on his face. "Good morning dear" he said.
Daphne looked at her pile of mail and sorted through it, making a smaller pile, and with her left hand, threw the larger pile of letters towards the door of the dining room; they left her hand then the letters took off as if banished.
Daphne waved her left hand and tea started pouring for her, as she opened the first letter she hadn't banished.
"Hmm" she said, and put the letter to one side and sipped some tea.
After breakfast Harry went off to Black Manor to see the builders.
"You want wot?" asked Dave, the chief builder, in a blue denim pointy hat.
"I um, want the house usable for a dinner party by just after Yule?" asked Harry.
Dave, who had a reddish face, frowned at him "This your wife's idea then?" he asked.
Harry nodded.
"We'll see what we can do, it's just with the rot and the cursed plumbing" said the builder.
"Ground floor, watertight, working loos and kitchen, first floor could… it could be walled off" said Harry.
The builder tipped his head "That sounds… possible" he admitted.
Harry left feeling optimistic.
-==0==-
A few days later, something battered on the office window. Harry went over and a small hawk was pecking at the glass, a letter tied to it's leg. Harry opened the window and the hawk flew in, pecked apart it's string and left, with a whoosh of its wings. The letter was just a folded piece of paper.
'Harry Potter, Potter hall' was the address.
Harry opened it up.
'Gov, the plumbings still cursed, and the curse-breakers are struggling. No chance of running water by Yule.
Dave.'
Harry re-read the note from the builder. 'The curse-breakers are struggling' with the cursed plumbing. Of course they were, because the Black family were utterly mad. Harry sighed and went looking for Daphne.
He found her sitting on piles of cushions on the couch in the drawing room, reading a story – with funny voices – to a group of little orphans. In one corner, a child-minder sat, watching the little dears.
She looked up as he came in.
"Children" she said "Harry's got a letter, I think we have to pause the story for a moment."
"It's about Black manor" said Harry, and he stopped to consider his next words. "The curse on the plumbing is proving difficult to remove. There's no chance of running water by Yule."
"Oh bother" said Daphne. "Well, we'll just have to have it here. Less guests, obviously."
Harry nodded.
Daphne went out that evening after dinner; to catch up with old friends from school. Harry had frowned when she told him, but Daphne blew him a kiss "Love you" she said as she went out the front doors. She came home a few hours later and rubbed his shoulders as he sat in the office.
"How was it?" asked Harry.
"Tiresome" said Daphne. "Won't be seeing them again."
"Sorry" said Harry.
-==0==-
Less guests meant the party would just have, just all forty-two orphans, twelve minders, the Carrow twins, Andromeda and Teddy and the Malfoys. Daphne insisted her sister was coming.
Harry put on a robe that didn't have snot on the shoulders, and looked vaguely respectable, and went to help herd orphans.
"Um, sir, we think a medical call would be helpful - there's lots of scraped knees and stuff" said one of the sensible minders. Harry summoned a chair into the front hall and sat.
"Right!" he said loudly "Medical call. Form one line, I'll be doing it. Daphne's getting ready… so I need to get you all fixed up. Come on!"
Half an hour of scraped knee roll-call later, the main fireplace flared green and two people, quite tall stepped out. Harry glanced over, it was the Malfoys. Ferret-face looked around the front hall dismissively, and Astoria was wearing a pretty but impractical white dress that had dangly bits a small child would rip off.
Harry stood up "Children, this is Mr Draco Malfoy, and Mrs Astoria Malfoy. Astoria is Daphne's sister."
The orphans looked over at the Malfoys.
"It you'd go to the drawing room, I'm sure Daphne will be down presently" said Harry, and he called Dreedle, who appeared with a pop.
"Master?" asked Dreedle, pink batlike ears flopping back and forth.
"Tell Daphne that her sister has arrived" said Harry. The glare from Astoria was adorable. Dreedle disappeared with a pop.
"The drawing room is down the hall, first on the left" said Harry, eyeing the orphans milling about on the stairs "I've got a little more work to do."
Five runny noses later – Harry summoned pepper-up potion and dosed the orphans in question, Harry banished the chair and then the bottle of pepper-up.
Harry looked up at the grand staircase, now holding most of the orphans – Minders were visible. "Dinner's pretty soon, so don't go somewhere else." said Harry.
He went to the drawing room, where Draco was looking at the paintings, while Astoria was rifling through the piano seat.
Harry cleared his throat.
Astoria looked over "I was looking for something good for Draco to play. You don't play do you?"
"No" said Harry.
Astoria picked out a piece of music from the piano seat and held it out, and Malfoy sat down at the piano, opened the keyboard cover, and propped the music up. Then he proceeded to … play something complicated and interesting and – Harry fumed. Draco Malfoy could play piano, really well. Astoria sat down next to him and he moved his hands, and then… they were both playing piano at the same time, Malfoy playing the low notes, Astoria the high ones, and with four hands, the tune was complicated and interesting and… Harry felt sick to his stomach. 'The Malfoys' could both play piano well, and did it together, and were giving each other bright smiles, and generally making Harry feel un-talented.
Daphne finally arrived, in one of her Harrods green sequin'ed dresses, and came over to him and kissed his cheek. Then she went over to the piano, took an arresting looking deep breath, and started to sing over the top of the music. Harry stared. And not just from the deep breaths and sleeveless strappy gown. Daphne sang… really well. High notes, clear and sharp that reminded him of her mind, and… gorgeous.
And Harry felt that he did not belong here, that this was not his kind of entertainment, he wasn't musical at all, didn't know the piece of music, and while it was his family's house, and probably his familiy's piano, he'd been a suburban kid that really only left Hogwarts with a string grasp on foiling Voldemort plots, that he'd parleyed over one insane year on the run into being the very famous chosen one. Well, and a bit of killing an insane immortal wizard, but that was just… killing Voldemort stuff.
The music ended and Daphne asked him "Did you like it dear?"
Harry nodded. "Beautiful" he said.
Dreedle walked into the drawing room and squeakily cleared their throat "Dinner is ready, master" they said.
"Thank you Dreedle" said Harry deliberately, and Daphne smiled at Harry and walked over and hung off his arm "Do follow us" said Daphne, and smiled at Harry again. The bubbling resentment in his stomach diminished a little, and he set off for the Dining room, which was just off the front hallway anyway. Andromeda was sitting at the table, holding Teddy on her lap and reading him a book.
The children were lined up, with minders holding the lines in position. By the noise, they followed the Malfoys in. As Harry got closer, he could hear the story Andromeda was telling.
"So the blood purists all became inbred chinless wonders…."
"Mmm" said Teddy.
"And then you were born, proving that one's family simply must marry muggleborns from time to time." Harry resisted the urge to smirk. Just.
The dining room was laid for a banquet with metal goblets for the children, and glasses at the head end. Harry tried to help Daphne into her chair and she looked up at him and pouted momentarily. Harry sat and with several quiet orders from the minders, the orphans sat down.
"Well that's all we've got time for" said Andromeda "Teddy, this your cousin Draco Malfoy, his mother is my sister. His wife is Astoria Malfoy nee Greengrass, she's Daphne's little sister."
"Uhuh" said Teddy, frowning, his hair going turquoise.
"So she's Aunt Astoria, and that is Uncle Draco" said Andromeda.
"Unca Draco" said Teddy – quite perceptively. Draco nodded politely, then Teddy's hair went white, his eyes hazel. Draco's hand was gripping the silverware and shaking.
"He does that" said Harry blandly. "Teddy, don't make fun of your Uncle Draco." He muttered "The mirror does that" and Daphne poked him in the leg with a single finger.
A little later, the Carrows came in wearing old but fairly fashionable dress robes, and looked wide-eyed at the massed orphans.
Daphne spoke up "Up here please – there are seats for you" and Flora and Hestia came closer.
Malfoy muttered "God, Potter's got the Carrows doing merlin knows what for him."
"The twins are housekeepers and maintenance staff at Black Manor" said Daphne sharply. "Flora, Hestia" she added, waving her hand at the two chairs – one either side of the table. One next to Teddy, and the other by the minders. One Carrows had to walk around behind Harry's chair. "I hope the meal's good cos the company's shit" muttered the Carrow on the way past.
"So, Flora, how is working for Harry?" asked Astoria.
"Blood… Quite hard work." said Flora "But the builders are making huge progress, and there's a pool."
"A pool?" asked Astoria.
"Black manor doesn't a have pool" said Draco.
"I added it" said Harry "The only plumbing that's not cursed."
"Ahem" said Daphne "Serve the first course!" she said firmly, and platters and jugs started floating into the room.
One the orphans had food, they chattered to each other – and with forty-two of them, it started to get hard to hear adult conversations.
Andromeda stood up and addressed the children. "Children, the appetiser is the first course served. You use the utensils on the outermost for the first course. The next course, you'll use the next set of utensils inwards. As an additional measure, for those of you old enough for Hogwarts; you will use your napkin to wipe your mouth before drinking, so as to not mark your drinking vessel with food." Andromeda sat down, and Malfoy rolled his eyes.
Daphne stood up "Children, the merit list for each surname – Black, Peverell, Potter and Slytherin, decides which bedrooms you get. Towers and top bedrooms are given on merit. By dessert, Hogwarts aged children will be eating respectably, or go down the merit list one position." Daphne sat down. The children apparently all needed to discuss that loudly.
Harry gave up trying to listen to Andromeda, drew his wand and cast Salazar's silence spell. The explosion of silence down the table had the orphans looking his way. He hissed the command, and Salazar's Hat popped onto his head. '$Boss, nobody behind you$' hissed the hat.
Harry stood up and glared. He felt Grandpa Sal's Hat moving about. "This is a dignified meal with guests. Arguing about gobstones scores will be done quietly" said Harry. Some of the smaller orphans blinked at him, and a few of the little girls cried, silently. All but one of them immediately stopped when their fuss was noise-less, and a minder patted the only actually worried little girl on the back.
"I'm not cross with you" said Harry. "This is a party, so you children can learn manners. We'd have had it at Black manor, but the plumbing isn't working yet. Okay. So… back to food." Harry sat down.
The little girl tried talking but no sound happened. Harry waved his wand and dropped the enchantment, and sound happened again.
Draco said quietly "He's being terrifying."
Astoria laughed "Oh dear, this isn't Harry being terrifying. I've seen that. This is Harry tapping on a wineglass for quiet."
Draco looked at his wife, staring, stared, clearly trying to understand. She smiled "Don't worry dear. Daphne's got him under control. As long as you don't make him angry, everything will be fine."
Draco's eyes bulged "don't make him angry" he hissed "I irritate him by breathing!"
Harry cast muffliatio. "Look" said Harry politely "She loves you, Daphne loves her, so you're a brother-in-law I can't stand. Just don't trot out the old rubbish and I won't do anything I'll get glared at for."
"Honesty Harry, you probably will anyway" said Daphne, lips quirking.
"Am I that bad?" asked Harry rhetorically.
"Uncle Harry blew up some bad men" said Teddy precociously.
"That was at a different event" said Harry. "And Aunty Daphne blew up more people more recently. She's an official Goblin Warrior. I'm just her husband."
Daphne snorted "They want you to get on and bring honour to the snake clan." she said "Which of course you won't do, unless attacked."
"Course not" said Harry.
"Did you have to walk around with the scalps on your armour?" asked Draco.
"Why yes" said Daphne "Auditable accounts before dishonour. And they killed my lead Thestral. A gift from Harry, from his family herd."
"We're still looking for compensation for that. I mean , you can't just buy a harness trained Thestral." said Harry.
"Of course you can't, They're creepy carnivorous horses that look half dead!" said Draco, a little stridently.
"Dogs are carnivores and nobody minds them" said Andromeda, and Harry suspected she was taking the mickey. "And whippets look half-starved"
"It's fast and I get to travel with my office, or read a book" said Daphne "I can get to Hogwarts in forty minutes, and don't have to walk up from Hogsmeade. What's not to like."
"The white staring eyes" said Draco surely.
"Where did you get the dress?" asked Astoria, tactfully changing the topic.
"Harrods." said Daphne "We went to dinner with the Baron and Baroness of Peebles, so we needed formal evening wear. Harrods has it on the rack, They had my size, we paid, and we were done."
"Who are they?" asked Draco.
"The Black Rod's parents" said Harry "He's an expert on money. It was his idea that we loaned the Goblins all the spare gold. Apparently just spending it would be bad for the economy."
"If you spent all your gold that would be bad economy, yes" said Draco, rolling his eyes.
"The economy of the whole country" said Harry, waving a hand for emphasis "Apparently there's a whole science of money, it makes arithmancy look interesting, and for countries like ours, well, we're a special case. In any event, the goblins lending money more cheaply is good for the economy."
"No it's not, I had several customers lined up for loads just before you did that deal, now they're borrowing from the bally goblins" said Draco.
"They'd borrow from you. Gosh." said Harry "I wasn't game to start a bank, the goblins are still a little touchy about me."
"And what's that supposed to mean!" said Draco indignantly "I served my sentence!"
"It's just, well, you're a Malfoy, and therefore very rich, and historically quite a powerful family. Must have been hard for people to get a fair loan from the Malfoys."
"They took what we offered" said Draco "The Goblins were charging much more."
"Well, it's competition, I suppose" said Daphne. "You could lend money cheaper than the goblins, for less... compound interest."
"But people trust the bally goblins, because there's a huge vault of Potter's gold they're lending against!"
"Exactly as designed. That's why we went to see the Baron. He's very busy with the Muggle Treasury. Like the Department of Finance, only their government doesn't have to levy Wizengamot houses every year." said Daphne.
"They don't? I suppose they didn't just have a war" conceded Draco.
"They had one in the eighties, apparently" said Harry "But the muggle economy is weird. I didn't notice at the time, but people need a lot of money to live. Not being able to charm or transfigure or make potions, they have to buy everything. So they all need full-time jobs, which pushes the wages down… and then the government imports cheap foreign labour to make businesses more profitable."
Draco Malfoy was staring at Harry "The… the muggle government imports people to lower wages? Just to benefit businesses?"
"Wealthy donors to political parties. They have parties of politicians. Like the conservatives who always vote for not changing anything. They've got conservatives too, but it's different." said Harry. Draco had an anguished look on his face "Even Fudge never did That for Father!" he said.
"Yes, I think there's like half of parliament – like the wizengamot that are Conservatives. So donors give the party money, and they vote for what they want." said Harry "I'm glad we don't have that."
Draco got a sly look on his face, and Harry had a very bad feeling all of a sudden. If Draco got the old supporters of Voldemort to act like a political party… no they'd not have the votes to swing law changes. Probably. He'd have to ask Hermione, later.
The main course was beef wellington.
"So, are you two planning on having any children?" asked Astoria "of your own."
"Perhaps" said Daphne, with a half smile, "When am I going to be an aunt?"
Astoria blushed. Harry thought it looked cute.
"Already?" asked Daphne "When's it due?"
"Erm" said Draco, looking pale "In erm, late May." Harry snorted, and tried to cover it up by picking up his napkin.
"What's so funny about that!" snapped Draco defensively.
"Nothing, nothing" said Harry, wiping his lips. "Isn't Astoria's birthday in May?"
"No dear, her middle name is May. She was born in March." said Daphne "It did confuse her when she was three or four."
"It should have been easy to work out" said Harry "There's no month of Isobel."
"I was four!" said Astoria. "Are you actually going to have some?"
"We're thinking … we should have some, and have them have a May birthday, so they can have a party with their cousin" said Harry, winking quickly to Daphne, who was barely holding in a smirk.
"At least ours will be older" said Draco. Daphne hastily sipped wine.
"So er" said Draco "you would want our child to mix with… this lot?"
"With Edward" said Andromeda "His cousin, and obviously your child must spend time with the Blacks – and Harry and Daphne are the Blacks. There are about ten children here who have Black blood in their veins already. Your child will have older cousins, regardless."
Draco waved at the long table "Ten blacks in there!"
"Yes" said Andromeda "Which is hardly remarkable, there used to be a lot of us. There are three of Harry's Peverell relatives here, not counting Harry and Daphne."
"And five Greengrasses" said Daphne, smiling momentarily "Have you determined sex, or picked names?"
"We don't know yet" said Astoria "I would like to find out on the day."
"It's a perfectly safe spell at St Mungos, and we wouldn't waste time or money getting things for the wrong sex. Though, given that we're Malfoys, it's probably a boy" said Draco. "We almost always have boys."
"Do you open your Yule presents the day before?" asked Andromeda.
Draco said no, but it sounded like a lie to Harry, who could easily see Draco as a wrapping paper ripper and present-shaker.
"You're not showing" said Daphne.
"Well not all of us wear skintight dresses, dear sister" said Astoria.
"If she had a waist like yours she would" murmured Harry. Daphne gave him a little glare.
"My son will be um, called Scorpius. A Black family name" said Draco.
Daphne groaned. "No they won't" said Harry "Honestly, a small boy called Scorpius. Other children will laugh at him. Pick something they can't get taunted about."
"You don't have any children of your own, you can't talk" said Draco.
"Daphne's in charge of names" said Harry.
"Harry wanted to commemorate people who meant a lot to him" said Daphne, frowning "which while an endearing sentiment, is reserved for middle names only. I'm going to use family names from my family."
"A Black family name or two, at least?" asked Andromeda.
At bedtime, Daphne asked "Do you think Draco's going to try to make a Conservative party in the wizengamot?"
"They won't have the votes. I think." said Harry.
"If he skips the blood-purity rhetoric, and stuck to just being self-serving prats…" said Daphne.
"Your father would join" said Harry.
"A lot of well-off families would join if it wasn't about blood purity." said Daphne. "He'd have to get some high-profile people who weren't on that side in the war to join."
"Like me" said Harry "And I'm not. Hermione would gut me."
"Well, there's that too. The reform agenda, Granger, Weasleys, Longbottom, your proxy votes. A conservative party would put the brakes on any reforms. Granger does alienate people with some of her … causes." said Daphne.
"I guess we end up going to more Wizengamot parties. Sound people out" said Harry, dreading trying to rein in Hermione. And not really wanting to either.
-==0==-
Harry therefore, ended up talking to Selwyn Senior at a Winter ball. Daphne had gone off to do mysterious witch things.
"Well, yes, I understand the Black treaty isn't solving problems." said Harry "It's a temporary thing. In the long run inbreeding in British magical society is leading to increased magical weakness and squibs, so the families that disagree with me will be increasingly irrelevant. My children, forty-two so far are getting some pointers about blood purity. Either to marry immigrants from Europe, like my wife's family did, or 'Muggle born' " Harry used air quotes. "Muggleborns being the offspring of squibs that are finally breeding true again, they don't have odd ideas about blood purity."
"Inbreeding!" said Selwyn angrily "How dare you accuse pureblood families of being inbred"
"As head of the house of Black, very easily" said Harry. "The house inbred, and we had a long-running problem with irritability" said Harry euphemistically. "My children with Black heritage are from cadet lines who have intermarried and mixed their blood enough to not have those problems"
Harry smiled, thinking of dear little Moira Cobweb Black.
"So, I hope you can find, maybe a nice European girl for your boy, Darius? isn't he?" asked Harry "That'll ensure magically strong children, though my Grandfather did very well with an American; my Grandmother was a Roundtree, I'm told, and my Father was a powerful wizard". Harry left unstated that his father married a muggleborn and Harry was the most powerful wizard alive in Britian as a result.
"Well, you're a half-blood after all said Selwyn "We can't all … accommodate things like that. Some of our family traditions…."
"My family don't feed people to basilisks any more" said Harry "Grand-to the whatever grandfather Salazar Slytherin did occasionally. We can change with discoveries in healing. Obviously, marrying a muggleborn would put the most fresh blood into the Selwyns, and ensure the strongest children, but there's more to life than magical strength, after all" said Harry.