Blazepanzer here, and chapter four is done! Note: Blazepanzer does not own Girls und Panzer. Enjoy!
Her hands curled firmly on the drive sticks, taking a deep breath. It was her first time actually driving the M3 Lee, and the brunet was nervous as hell, her amber gaze quite unsure of if she could do this.
"Don't worry Amelia, you'll be fine," her commander reassured her.
"Thank you Yuko," Amelia smiled, before relaxing. With great determination, she began to drive the tank forward, smiling gently as she realized she was actually doing it quite well.
"Lee One to Lee Two, we'll meet you at the staging area, is Amelia doing alright?"
"She's doing fine Mako," Yuko smiled gently.
"Good...I was a little worried about how'd she do being a newcomer, but still," Mako trailed off.
"Warning, heads up, something's happened at Kuromorimine, apparently we need to watch out for ME 262's armed with live anti-tank missiles."
"ME 262's?" Amelia asked, quickly growing worried.
"This is bad, we'd better head for the forest..." Yuko suggested.
"No, we should head for the base..." Mako began, before suddenly yelling out "ME 262's incoming!"
Amelia suddenly felt a sharp pain and then a sheering...burning sensation. It Hurts! This burning sensation hurts so much! She screeched inwardly, before everything went black.
Hanoashi woke up with a start...breathing. "What..." she gasped, rising out of her bed gently so as not to wake up her still sleeping siblings. Stifling a sigh, she began taking deep breaths, trying to piece together what she learned.
It...it can't be...right? She mused in horror...but deep down she knew the truth.
She'd died while driving a tank.
Yukaro sat at his desk with his head down. His shop wasn't open yet, it wouldn't be for another four hours...but he couldn't help but feel put out.
Who was Amelia to me...he mused quietly. He very...very vaguely remembered how they had meet...began dating...and that awful nightmare...He'd heard about the event before.
The Great Schism...where Kuromorimine turned on their male students and then supposedly attacked other co-ed academies. It had ultimately lead to many schools switching to a single gender curriculum and to Sensado becoming a strictly girls only sport.
At least until 1984, when tensions between the Soviet union and the western block lead one Shiho Nishisumi to fund the MPTL, or Male Panzer Training League, much to the disapproval of her mother who had instigated the Great Schism. But with the exceedingly high potential of war on the horizon, she was in no position to stop or hamper her daughter's plans.
And in 1991, the Co-ed league formed. It was mostly just smaller schools, about 12 who had existing tank squadrons. Initially as long as you had five tanks, you could enter the league. However, as the league grew, new regulations began cropping for the main tournament. The need to have twelve tanks to enter the master tournaments, the armor and cannon restrictions, and so on. The next year in 1992, the Male Panzer Training league dropped the modern tank training pretext and switched to a more WWII focused Sensado league.
That wasn't what had frightened Yukaro so much...What had frightened him was that he had seen an attack on Ooarai from this Yuko's perspective. He had watched his...Yuko's team die.
And Amelia...somehow Yukaro could tell that Yuko had loved this Amelia girl...that he had loved her. And yet...he loved Hanoashi now, so his dream was confusing the hell out of him.
How can I love Hanoashi when I loved Amelia back then... he mused. Suddenly his phone vibrated.
It was a text from Hanoashi. Normally his heart would flutter, but now it sank. Should I ignore it...no...she might need something, and there's no harm in just looking, he decided, flipping his phone open and gazing at the text.
"Had a weird dream luv...freaking me out bad...you awake?"
Yukaro let out a quiet hum...deciding to respond.
"Something about an M3 Lee with a driver and commander named Amerlia and Yuko?"
"...Er..." * Sighs * "Yeah...how'd you know?"
"I had the same dream...from Yuko's perspective." Yukaro confessed. Why do I feel like I shouldn't have done that? He wondered.
… "Mine was from Amelia's...Er...may I come over? I...I think we need to talk about this..."
Yukaro suddenly felt relieved. So it was Hanoashi that I loved back then...wait..oh no!His heart sank once again. "I'm at my shop, feel free to come on in, the door's open."
"I'll be there in five...see you luv."
Yukaro sighed, gazing out the door. I'd hope it was a dream...but it was too real...
He barely waited more than four minutes when his door opened. Gazing up, he saw his ginger haired girlfriend. Normally seeing her would make his day...but seeing her in this kind of state...
"Yukaro..." she whispered, walking up to him until she was less than a foot away, before hugging him, erupting into a series of sobs.
He had no idea what to do, except hug her in return as tears of his own began to flow.
"I...died...we..." Hanoashi whispered gently.
"Blaze..." Yukaro whimpered...not sure of how to answer.
Maho rose gently, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. Gazing around, she noticed that Miho was still asleep, but Hanoashi was missing. Maybe she's downstairs... she mused, walking down to check.
Noticing that Hanoahsi's purse was gone, Maho knew instantly that her sister must have gone out. This...early...then again she does have a habit of waking up before dawn. Still...why would she leave the house? She didn't even leave a note...
Maho sighed. "Baka," she uttered, before sitting down. If she's not back in an hour, I'll just have to go looking for her...I guess...
Hanoashi let out a sigh. "Thanks..." she whispered, pulling back a bit. "Do...you really think that was us?" she asked tentatively.
"Do you?" Yukaro whispered.
"I asked you first," Hanoashi muttered softly. "Baka..." she added affectionately as her expression softened. "I'm sure it had to have been us."
"Yeah...me too. I...I'm just glad that...that we meet again...that we feel in love again." Yukaro sighed.
"Me too...but...are we going to be reincarnated again and again? I mean...I ...I don't want to just die and cease existing. But I also don't want to just keep being reborn over and over either!"
"Perhaps...we were only reincarnated because of how our life...er...previous life ended." Yukaro suggested.
"Yeah maybe...look...do you...want me to quit doing Sensado? I mean that's how I...no...we died after all. "
"An anti-tank missile isn't going to be fired at you, and even if I did start worrying about you, I love you too much to force you into doing that." Yukaro let out a smiled. "What ever makes you happy."
Hanoashi nodded. "I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm strongly thinking about switching to Archery."
"But...won't Miho be upset?" Yukaro asked.
"Not a word of this revelation to either of my sisters...alright? They feel guilty enough about their role in Kuromorimine as it is without going through more undeserved guilt because of this." Hanoashi then sighed. "Well...I'll give Sensado a try for their sake...but if I begin to freak out...then..."
"Got it," Yukaro nodded seriously. "Don't worry...your secret is safe with me, but...what happens if you find Sensado too difficult...or worse...have a panic attack?"
Hanoashi glanced down. "I'll...just have to tell them I can't do it...and leave it at that."
"Anyways, you'd better head to school soon," Yukaro cautioned. "It's getting about time to leave."
"No...don't wanna," Hanoashi sobbed, burring her head into Yukaro's chest again.
"Blaze...I'll tell Maho you're playing hokey..." Yukaro warned gently.
"Ba..bakkaaa!" Hanoashi sobbed, but pulled back. "Traitor Baka..." she smirked. "Okay...fine...but I'm coming straight here after school..."
"Practice...remember?" Yukaro smirked.
"I feel sick now," Hanoashi slumped.
"Don't puke on the rug," Yukaro smirked.
"Baka..." Hanoashi huffed.
"You did say you'd keep doing Sensado for Miho's sake, remember?"
"Baka baka baka baka," Hanoashi half shouted, half sighed. "Fine...but don't blame me if I eat three gallons of Ice Cream before practice!" She added in a sing song voice.
"Oh don't you even joke like that!" Yukaro growled. "I remember that time you had to have your shit pulled out of your asshole because you forgot and ate three slices of chocolate cake!"
"Oh hell it was only two," Hanoashi muttered, crossing her arms and forcing a frown on her face. "But yeah...thanks for staying by my side during that operation. Even...if it wasn't my finest moment."
Yukaro gently hugged her. "Anything for you Blaze...but seriously, don't load up on sugar just to skip practice."
"Fine," Hanoashi nodded gently.
Maho dashed through the streets, Miho panting behind. "Why the hell did she have to get lost!" Maho panicked.
"Sis...maybe she went to school early and just forgot to tell us?" Miho offered.
"That early...you're both such idiots sometimes," Maho muttered under her breath. "Huh?" Taking out her phone, she let out a frown.
"What's wrong?" Miho asked.
"Apparently she's been with Yukaro since four." Maho muttered.
"So...what's the issue?" Miho asked.
"She was with her boyfriend...at four..." Maho muttered. "Think about it..."
"Er...Sex?" Miho shrugged.
Maho gently socked Miho on the arm. "Not so loud!" Maho hissed, before patting Miho on the back. "No, not..." She sighed. "Not that, but if people found out about her sneaking off to see him at four in the morning...not a good look."
"Well...we get to actually ride in the tanks today, so hopefully that'll cheer her up," Miho smiled.
"Yeah, she's become a good driver, and you've become a good Gunner," Maho smiled back gently.
"I hope I can just live up to everyone's standards," Miho fretted briefly.
"Like I've said, you'll do fine. Both you and Blaze have worked too hard to worry so much.
Little did Maho realized what her sister had just learned or the ramification it would have.
Hanoashi let out a quiet sigh as the bell for lunch rang.
"You okay Blaze...you haven't said much today..." Asuza asked her quietly.
Hanoashi hummed a bit. "I..." she paused, wanting to let someone know about her dream, but deep down she knew that her friend wouldn't understand. "I'm fine..." she sighed.
"You're not fine. I won't pressure you if you don't want to...but...if somethings bothering you then you should speak to someone about it." Asuza pressured.
"Thanks...but...I already spoke so someone about it," Hanoashi whispered.
"Did they help?" Asuza asked.
"..."
"Blaze." Asuza whispered.
"I...I think I may have...never mind," Hanoashi sighed, rising up and walking out of the door.
"Asuza!"
"Miho...is something wrong with Blaze?" Asuza asked gently. "She's...been quiet lately."
Miho shrugged. "I know she left at four to see Yukaro...and he said to keep an eye on her from a distance, but...beyond that I don't know."
"Did they break up?" Saki asked quietly.
Miho shook her head. "No...Yukaro...he was evasive about it, but he said that she came to see him because something was troubling her earlier this morning."
"She didn't confide in you or Maho?" Asuza gasped, surprised.
"No...but whatever it was must have affected her badly."
"So...besides tanks, what are you interested in?" Maho asked, her amber gaze curious.
"Well...world war two..." Yukari began. "Becoming a barber like my mother, or perhaps joining the JSDF...er..."
"So basically military," Maho sighed. "Aside from not being expected to win every time and the hair dresser bit, you sound like what my life would have been like."
"Sorry..." Yukari trailed of as Maho shook her head.
"Don't worry about it," Maho smiled. "Besides, this tank stuff sound quite fun, so..." She trailed off as they entered the hangers. "Wow...looks like everyone is here already."
"Oni-chan...have you seen Hanoashi?" Miho gasped.
"No...is she not here?" Maho gasped.
"Not that I know of..." Miho trailed off as Hanoashi came in. "I'm here now," she whispered quietly.
"You okay?" Maho asked, clearly worried.
Hanoashi looked almost as if she wanted to leap in her arms and explain something, but she fought back, quietly heading to the Lee.
"Somethings wrong," Erika resounded beside her.
"Yeah...what should we do?" Maho asked.
"Well...if Asuza is smart, she'll ground her for the day." Erika nodded. "But...it's her decision to make on her own."
"But that's cruel!" Miho gasped.
"It may be for the best," Maho sighed beguilingly.
"Erika, you're up to run the course," Megumi announced.
"Right, ready guys?" Erika smiled.
"Ready commander!" Yukari saluted sharply.
"Ready," Maho affirmed, determination running through her eyes.
"Rea...ahhhhhhh...ready..." Mako yawned.
"Are you bored or just tired?" Erika deadpanned. "Anyways, mount the tank!"
Maho smiled gently as she slid into position. Maybe it's a good thing that I opted for the loader position...those three always looked cramped as hell!
"Ah," Maho sighed as the engine began to run. "That brings me back."
"I thought you had bad memories of tanks," Erika deadpanned.
"I have some good memories too," Maho smirked.
"Good to know," Erika nodded. "Anyways, Panzer Vor!"
"Alright, Alice, it's your turn, show us what you've got!" Megumi smiled.
Miho quietly followed Alice into the tank. This is it...just please...please Spirit of the Maus don't let me screw this up!
"Karina, just remember to take things slow. Hana, be prepared on the radio at all times. Saki, do you remember the correct order of our ordinance?"
Saki nodded. "HE shells in the right, HEAT on the left and regular AT on the front."
"Very good. And Miho...do you remember how to tell distance in the gun sights?"
Miho let out a nod. "I remember Commander," she smiled.
"Good! Panzer Vor!"
Miho let out a small smile as Hana announced they'd be approaching the target area in thirty seconds. "Saki, please load an anti-tank round into the cannon. Miho, prepare to fire. Remember, we're just trying to get the basics down, so don't be too bummed out if you miss the first time or two."
"Don't worry, I'm going to hit it commander," Miho promised.
"Looking forward to it," Alice smiled.
Miho peered though the sights, eyeing up the target carefully. "I've got you now!" She hissed.
"Fire!" Alice shouted.
Miho pressed the trigger, frowning as she nicked the outside ring of the target. "Not a bulls-eye," she frowned.
"No, but you did hit the target like you said you would, well done!" Alice smiled. "And now it's time head back to the hangers."
Miho desperately wanted to beg for another chance to hit the target, but today was just a small practical so that they could learn how to perform their task first hand. One tank at a time. Each team, a quick solo drive to their target area, fire until your gunner hits, and then return.
That was all today was. Exciting until it was over, followed by a slight quip of disappointment of how fast it was over, then over-enjoyment over how well you did.
And in all honestly Miho could hold her head up high and admit that she did good.
Hanoashi felt herself trembling as she entered the driver's seat. I...shouldn't be here... she fretted.
"Hanoashi..." Asuza whispered.
Hanoashi wrapped her fingers around the steering shifts, before taking them off and sighing. "Commander...I'm sorry...but I can't do this today."
"What do you mean you can't can't?" Ayumi gasped.
Hanoashi was about to respond when she started wheezing.
"Blaze!" Asuza gasped, poking her head out. "Instructor Megumi! Hanoashi's having a panic attack!"
Megumi came running immediately. "Everyone out, I'll handle this," she order, causing the teens to run out of the tank.
"Hanoashi...are you okay?" Megumi gasped.
Hanoashi just trembled in response, before slumping down, just barely managing to catch herself. "No...I..." she managed to get out before closing her eyes.
Megumi sighed as she gently took the ginger girl and hauled her out of the tank. "Rikona...perhaps you ought to take her home with her." She called down to the vice heiress.
Rikona just nodded, gently taking her cousin in her arms. "She can't be on the Sensado team if she's acting like this, right?" she whispered, hurt clouding in her eyes.
Megumi sighed. "I can see if she'd make a good assistant, but beyond that, I'd wouldn't dare put her back in the tank for a while."
"But I don't understand, why would she freak out like that?" Rikona pressed.
"I don't know, but I'll call Chono and ask what she thinks." Megumi promised.
"Hanoashi...can you hear me?"
Her green eyes flickered open. "Rikona...how'd I get here?" Hanoashi gasped as she sat up.
At once she felt herself in Rikona's embrace. "Shh...don't worry about that...you're safe now."
"I...I can't be on the Sensado team anymore...not if I'm freaking out like that," Hanoashi sobbed. "I'm...I'm so sorry!"
"It's okay Blaze, we all understand." Rikona soothed. "Megumi wants you to become her assistant instead of the Lee's driver though."
Hanoashi gazed downward. "That's...thoughtful of her." Sighing, she nodded. "I'll do my best, but...if I still freak out then I'll need to switch to Archery."
"That's understandable Blaze." Rikona smiled briefly, before turning serious. "Do...you want to talk about what caused you to freak out?"
Hanoashi shook her head. "No...not yet anyways."
"Does it involve Yukaro?" Rikona asked, her expression growing stern.
"Not a word to Maho or Miho." Hanoashi hissed, before sighing. "Okay...I had a dream. In that dream, I was a girl named Amelia, and I was a new driver for one of Ooarai's M3 Lee tanks. My Commander happened to be a boy by the name of Yuko...my boyfriend in that dream. Anyways, we were practicing our driving maneuvers when our team commander received a warning of Kuromorimine ME 262 jets equipped with anti-tank missiles heading our way."
She paused, catching her breath. "But...before we could do anything, I heard Yuko cuss...and all of a sudden I felt a...well a rather intense burning sensation and the sharpest pain I'd ever felt. My vision went white...and I suddenly woke up. At the time I believed that had to have been me...so I went to see Yukaro about it. Turns out...he had the same dream as me, but from Yuko's perspective."
"Blaze...I'm...I'm so sorry," Rikona whispered. "But...the records showed that an M3 Lee was destroyed by an modified ME 262 via anti-tank missiles. With a commander and driver named Yuko and Amelia respectively."
"So...are we their reincarnations, or are we just seeing their memories?" Hanoashi asked hopefully.
"Do you have doubts?" Rikona countered gently.
Hanoashi sighed. "I...have no doubts about it. But...is it wrong for me to hope that me and Yukaro just had a bad nightmare?"
"To wish it...no. But to try and ignore it...yes." Rikona sighed. "We're lucky that your panic attack occurred right before you moved out and not during your practice or a match."
"I know..." Hanoashi gazed away briefly. "You...won't tell my sisters...right?"
"No," Rikona shook her head. "You're probably right not to tell them, but...what if they discover it on their own?"
"I'll just have to reassure them that they are my beloved sisters, and that this revelation changes nothing." Hanoashi vowed. "Can...you go and tell Yukaro about what happened at practice? He...he deserves to know."
"Sure," Rikona smiled in understanding. "But for now you might ought to get some sleep."
Maho sighed as she sat down, Yukari beside her. "So...what's all this about Asuza?" she asked.
"I...want to know what was wrong with Hanoashi...if that's okay." Asuza pressed. "As her tank commander, I...I feel like I should know if something is wrong with her."
Maho nodded. "Yes...we need to discuss it. But...this all stays between us, no one else gets involved, okay?" She agreed, gazing around with a most serious expression."
"We should probably begin with what we do know," Yukari began. "From what I saw it looked like she may have been suffering from a PTSD episode."
"PTSD?" Asusa asked quietly.
"Post Traumatic Stress Disorder," Yukari continued. "Basically when someone's been through war or other extreme situation, certain stimuli can trigger a reaction. Sometimes the sound of popcorn or rattling can cause a soldier to duck down to avoid what they perceive as machine-gun fire."
"But as far as I know, Hanoashi hasn't gone through anything like that," Maho paused.
"What...what about the time she almost picked up that cone snail or found me caught in that barbed wire fence?" Miho suggested.
"Maybe..." Maho frowned. "But...she went to see Yukaro at four this morning...why would she be panicking now?"
"Wait...she went to see my brother that early?" Yukari gasped, clearly shocked.
"Well...he reassured us that they just kept each other company until it was time for her to leave for school, and asked us to keep an eye on her during Sensado practice." Maho held her hands up. "If I were to guess...something bothered her really early during the morning, and since Miho and I were asleep, she probably messaged Yukaro about it and he invited her over, or she asked if she could come over and he said yes."
"I guess I never really understood just how close they were," Miho sighed.
"Well...that kinda is what a good boyfriend does, listen to the concerns about their girlfriend and try to help them the best he can." Maho shrugged.
"Do...you think they might have broke up?" Asuza asked.
Maho shook her head. "No...I doubt that's it. And Yukari's suggestion of her having a PTSD attack sounds spot on, but unless she tells us...we may never know."
"Could Rikona tell us?" Miho suggested.
Maho sighed. "Maybe, but even if Hanoashi does confide in her, it's doubtful that Rikona would just share it with us unless it concerns us, and given that she went to Yukaro and not us, maybe she doesn't want us to know what's bothering her...at least not yet anyways.
"What do you mean?" Miho protested indignantly. "Blaze is our sister, she should want to confide in us first!"
"Miho...Hanoashi is practically guarantied to marry Yukaro at this point, the only reason she's holding off on tying the knot with him so to speak is because Mother believes in the American age of consent as apposed to Japan's age of consent. Of course she's going to confide in him before us nowadays."
"Wait...not to digress...but there's a difference in the age of consent between the us and Japan?" Azusa gasped.
Maho nodded. "Here, it's sixteen for girls and eighteen for boys, with the stipulation that both parties need parental permission to marry before the age of twenty. However, there is ongoing legislation to make it eighteen for both boys and girls here in Japan, much like the US."
"I see..." Asuza mused, deep in thought.
"So...what do we do now?" Miho asked.
"We simply be there for her, and comfort her, but avoid smothering her," Maho suggested. "Hopefully she'll eventually tell us what's wrong, or at least manage to overcome her issues on her own, but we need to be there for her in case she needs us."
Rikona entered the shop, noticing that they were a few patrons shopping around. She let out a hum. So this is the kinda shop he's opened? I've heard that it's a local favorite, but still not what I was expecting.
"Rikona," Yukaro smiled. "It's been a while since we last met."
"Hey Yukaro," Rikona smiled, walking over, growing a bit more apprehensive as she sat down. "Hey...listen...something happened to Hanoashi at practice." she began gently.
"Oh no...is she alright?" He asked gently, his expression growing worried.
"She...had a panic attack." Rikona sighed. "I believed she discussed the dream she had with you first?"
Yukaro slumped. "Do you believe we're reincarnated and had originally died during the Great Schism" He asked gently.
Rikona nodded. "Almost nobody knows about what happened to that crew. Me and Hitomi know about it because we learned a lot about the secrets of this academy, including the fact that a commander and driver named Yuko and Amelia respectivly were murdered by a Kuromorimine ME262 via an Anti-tank missile."
She gazed at him gently. "Look...I know...that some of us had a few concerned when you and Blaze started going out...but right now I'm glad you're the one she's in decided to make her life with."
Yukaro nodded seriously. "Like I said before, I love Hanoashi. She's not a lust object or a sex doll to me, she's the most important person to me. More even than my own flesh and blood. To see her hurting like she did this morning...it really hurt."
"I'm glad," Rikona smiled. "That's why mother is demanding Hanoashi stay away from school tomorrow. I'd appreciate it if you could spend the day with her."
Yukaro nodded. "Sure, I take Thursdays and Sundays off, so it'll be fine. And...I think we both need some time off, though her especially."
"May I ask how you're taking things?" Rikona asked tentatively.
Yukaro sighed. "When I had the dream, I felt confused. How could I have loved Hanoashi so much now when I had felt the same way about this Amelia in my past life. When Hanoashi told me about her dream, of how she was Amelia, I was so happy for a brief moment that Hanoashi was indeed Amelia. But then I realized how terrifying dying that way and just remembering how she had died must have been for her, and I...I felt sick."
"And how to you feel right now?" Rikona promoted gently.
"Worried about Hanoashi...and maybe a bit guilty. She...asked me if I wanted her to quit Sensado, and I...I told her she should still give it a chance. Even though she clearly wanted to avoid practice. Badly."
"She actually wanted to avoid practice today?" Rikona gasped.
Yukaro nodded. "She even joked about eating three gallons of Ice Cream. I...think we both know what would have happened if she actually did that."
"So...it was really that bad huh?" Rikona mused. "We both know how bad it is when her SC-type4 diabetes acts up like that, so for her to threaten to go that far is rather odd. But...given how bad she was affected by her realization, I'm not too surprised."
"Are you going to tell her sisters?" Yukaro asked gently.
Rikona shook her head. "No, and if I recall correctly, you promised her that you wouldn't tell them."
"They're going to find out eventually, though," Yukaro warned. "I mean, our lips are sealed, but I have doubts that this can be kept silents forever, no mater how we try to keep it."
"Yeah, you're right," Rikona sighed. "But listen, we've got to try, and hopefully...if and when they do find out, and I agree that they will somehow, we need to be ready."
"But...they'll feel so guilty. Even though they've done nothing wrong," He gazed out the front door, and sighed.
"I know," Rikona sighed. "I just hope nothing bad happens if they do find out."