Sorry for the delay in posting this. It's been a busy week! This is the last of my season 4 chapters - I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think. I'll be taking a break for the rest of April and will start writing Rose's season 5 in May. She'll be an adult then! Thanks to all of you who read and comment and follow and favourite - I appreciate you all, I really do. Have a great Easter. See you in a few weeks. Wenlock x
Tommy filled Rose in on what had actually happened at the fight and in the subsequent days as he drove to London. She sat next to him and listened, not responding. She was incredibly relieved that her family was alive and well and that the Vendetta was over, but she couldn't really process it all, especially on top of what had already happened to her. So she sat in silence and let Tommy talk.
Tommy had a lot of questions for his sister but he could tell she wasn't ready to answer them, so he held back. She needed time to get over everything that had happened to her. He couldn't imagine what it must have been like for her to have been told all her family was dead. She must have been broken and he wondered what damage would remain.
Arriving in London, he navigated his way through the streets until he reached Ada's house. Ada and Karl were at Arrow House waiting for him to bring Rose home, along with the rest of the family. Tommy knew his arm needed attention where Alfie's bullet had sliced through it, so he planned to call a doctor to the house and let Rose rest for a while too. Opening the door with his key, Tommy led Rose inside. The house had been empty since Ada had left for Boston a few months before Christmas and was unstaffed and cold.
"Go and make a fire in the living room, Mouse. I'm going to call the doctor to come and fix my arm."
A look of concern crossed her face. "Is it bad?"
"No, it's just a scratch, but I can't drive unless it's dressed. I need it to stop bleeding."
Her eyes glanced at his arm and nodded. She headed to the living room to build the fire. The doctor came and stitched up Tommy's arm and by the time he left and Tommy joined Rose, the fire was roaring and the room had warmed up considerably. Rose had taken her coat and boots off and was sitting with her legs tucked under her on the sofa, staring at the flames. Tommy thought she looked small and vulnerable. He poured himself a glass of whiskey then sat down next to her and lit a cigarette which he offered to her. She took it and he lit another one for himself. They sat in silence for a while, watching the flames dance, smoking their cigarettes. Tommy cleared his throat.
"Do you want to get home tonight? I can get petrol for the car."
Rose sighed. She was surprised to find that she wasn't in a hurry to get back to Arrow House. Tommy picked up on her mood.
"We can stay here tonight if you'd prefer."
She looked at him and saw the concern in his eyes. "I'm just tired, Tommy."
"I know. There's no hurry. We can stay here tonight and drive home tomorrow."
She nodded and looked back at the fire. "Yeah"
Tommy took a sip of his drink then stood up. "I'll make some calls and get some food brought in."
Rose took a pull on her cigarette and nodded again. She wasn't hungry but didn't have the energy to say anything. Tommy left the room and she let out a breath. Her world had been turned upside down and then put back again in the space of a week and her head was spinning. She had believed that Tommy was dead and had begun to envision a life without him and with Alfie, and now Tommy was alive and Alfie was dead. She had gone from leaning on one to leaning on the other and she didn't feel like she could lean on anyone anymore. The emotional pain and hurt she had carried over the past few days had been horrendous. And now, even as she'd gained her family, she'd lost someone else. She had loved Alfie, but he had betrayed her in the worst possible way. He was dead now and although he had hurt her deeply, she wished he wasn't. She frowned and shook her head. Everything was so confusing and all she could think about was that letting people get close to her was too risky. It made her vulnerable and weak and open to being hurt and manipulated. She never wanted to let that happen again.
After making sure they'd be taken care of till the next morning, Tommy came back in the room and sat down with his arm across the back of the chair. Rose suddenly felt exhausted. She shifted along the sofa and leaned into him. He put his arm down and around her, holding her close.
"Is Fred ok?"
"He's grand. He misses you - spends his time sniffing round the house, trying pick up your scent."
She smiled, imagining Fred hunting for her. She couldn't wait to see him.
"And Nua?"
"Mal's taking good care of her. That boy missed you. He wouldn't stop asking me where you were."
Rose didn't want to think about Mal. "Tommy?"
"Mmh?"
"It was almost a week before you came for me."
He breathed in deeply. "Yeah. I wanted to come sooner, I did, but I had to deal with Luca before I came for you. I knew you were safe with Alfie. I couldn't have guaranteed your safety at home."
She thought about what he'd said for a moment.
"I was going to sneak into the hall to watch the fight that night and Alfie found me outside. There were gunshots and …" She paused as she remembered her fear that night. "Alfie said it was the Italians. He said it was dangerous and that I needed to leave with him."
She sat up and looked at him.
"All I could think of was getting into that hall and being with you and the others. I didn't care if it was dangerous, I didn't care if I died, I just wanted to be with you. Tommy, I don't want to be safe, I want to be with my family because that's where I belong. When Alfie told me you were all dead, the only thing I could think about was that I'd let you all down by not being with you when things went wrong."
Tommy shook his head and opened his mouth to speak. Rose held up a hand. She wasn't finished.
"When Alfie tried to get me to leave with him, he told me that it was what you would have wanted – that you would have wanted me to be safe. And I knew he was right. So I went with him. They were the worst days of my life, Tommy. Even worse than when …" She didn't finish her thought. "I thought I was completely alone in the world. There was no one that I belonged to. It … it was awful, Tommy. The worst feeling. I wished I'd died with you because I didn't want to have to live without you."
"Rose..."
"Promise me, Tommy - promise me that you'll never do that again. You'll never keep me away from what's happening to the family. I'm a Shelby, just like you are – bad or good, death or life – I'm in it with you."
Tommy reached out and tucked a strand of Rose's hair behind her ear. "I can't promise that, Rose."
She pushed his hand away. "I'm not a child anymore. I'll be fifteen soon. And I'm not innocent, I know what you do, I know what the family business is. I want to be as involved as everyone else. Shouldn't that be up to me? Shouldn't I have a say?"
Tommy shook his head. "All that side of things of things is over with now, Rose. This Vendetta, it was the last of the bad business and now we can just concentrate on the legitimate side. You will be involved in that, you'll have a job, a good position that will give you a future."
Rose sighed. "You know as well as I do that the bad side of the business will never be over. I want to be involved in both sides. I don't want to be left at the mercy of whichever enemy you're dealing with – I want to be involved in fighting them, like you, like Polly. I can help and I'd be good at it."
"I know you would. That's what I'm worried about."
"Then let me! Let me come alongside you."
"We don't have to talk about this now, Mouse. Let's wait for the dust to settle and then see where we are."
Rose let out an exasperated sigh and stood up. She walked over to the drinks table and picked up the brandy bottle.
"Rose, don't."
She rounded on him. "And why not, Tommy? What else is going to help me deal with all this, eh?"
He frowned, confused. "All what? You're safe now, the family is safe. We can move on."
She stared at him incredulously. Her voice rose. "Did you not hear me? I don't want to be safe! I want to be in control. I want to hurt them before they hurt me. I want kill them before they kill you."
She stopped abruptly as she realised what she'd said. She turned back round and poured herself a glass of brandy, working hard to keep her hands from shaking. She could feel Tommy eyes on her but took a sip before she turned round. The brandy burned as it went down and she grimaced. Facing Tommy, she kept her voice steady.
"I'm going upstairs to lie down. I'll use Ada's room."
She took a step towards the door. Tommy stretched his arm out towards her. He pointed at the glass in her hand and held his hand out for it. She stopped, then lifted the glass to her lips and downed the entire drink. Putting the empty glass in Tommy's outstretched hand, she left the room, her eyes watering with the effort of trying not to cough at the sudden intake of alcohol.
Tommy watched the door close and looked into the glass in his hand. He swore quietly. He tried to tell himself that she was just disturbed by what she'd gone through, that this was a knee-jerk reaction to one of the worst weeks of her life. But he knew, deep down, that she meant it, that she'd meant it for a while. He knew because he recognised in her his own reactions and feelings. He'd known it when she'd killed the Italian at the train station. He knew it whenever he'd have to chastise her or give her a thrashing for getting into fights or for breaking his rules when she was younger. She had his ruthlessness in her, his determination, his intellect. And now, despite all his attempts to keep her away from being damaged, she had his fearlessness too. She wasn't afraid of what happened to her anymore. She had given up trying to toe the line and do what was expected of her. What she wanted was control and power. He could see in her face that Alfie betraying her had broken the last thread of trust she had for anyone outside of the family, and maybe even within. She would finish off those walls she was building around herself and let no one else in. She had determined to not be used or manipulated again and everything she did from then on would be to that end.
He pinched the bridge of his nose. He didn't want this for her, he didn't want her to end up like him – deliberately alone, guarded against any kind of love, existing rather than living. He wasn't sure if there was a way he could pull her out of it anymore. Maybe she would soften now that life was going to be smoother, better, legitimate. Maybe.
They reached Arrow House at lunchtime the following day. Neither had slept well in Ada's house but neither of them spoke about it. In fact, they barely spoke at all on the journey home. When Tommy pulled the car up in front of his mansion, Rose looked at the front door and realised she was glad to be home. Not that the house itself held any significance for her, it was who was inside it that she longed to be with. Tommy looked across at her after turning off the engine.
"Ready?"
She nodded.
Moments later, she was being smothered with hugs. Arthur had got hold of her first and had held her so tight that she could barely breathe. After that, she was passed from one family member to another, being enfolded in so many arms that she couldn't tell who was who. She could definitely tell whose paws were jumping up at her though. She extricated herself from the arms around her and dropped to the floor to be greeted by Fred who had never known such excitement. His whole body wagged, not just his tail. He jumped at her and licked her and barked his joy at having his mistress back with him. Rose beamed at his enthusiasm and bundled him in her arms as she stood up. She looked at her family who were all smiling at her and suddenly felt overwhelmed. Her eyes filled with tears and she thought her legs might buckle. Polly noticed and came over to her, putting an arm around her shoulders.
"Right, leave her alone, you lot. She must be exhausted. Come on, Sweetheart, let's go and find some quiet, hmm?"
Rose nodded gratefully and, letting Fred jump to the ground, allowed her aunt to lead her out and up the stairs to her room. Once there, Polly bustled round getting out some clothes for Rose to change into. Moving over to the window, Rose looked out at the familiar view and couldn't stop the tears from falling. She tried hard to stop but the more she tried the more she cried, her shoulders shuddering, her throat catching. Fred whined and pawed at her, not understanding why she was upset. Polly turned at the sound of a loud sniff coming from her niece and saw that she was struggling to hold it together. She went over and pulled her round into a hug. Rose put her arms around her aunt, breathing in her familiar perfume, and sobbed. She cried because she felt like she'd missed out on something the family had been through together. She cried because she was back with the people she loved. She cried because she'd been deceived and hurt. She cried because Alfie was dead.
Polly stood and let Rose cry herself out and when she finally stopped and became quiet in her arms, she took her hand and led her over to the bed.
"Let's get you out of these clothes that don't belong to you, hey? You're back now, Rose, back where you belong."
So Polly helped Rose change into her own clothes and then stood back and looked at her.
"That's better. You look like you again."
Rose smiled weakly. Polly took a brush, removed the ribbon from Rose's hair and began to brush it.
"Would you like to lie down and have a rest? We're having a family dinner tonight."
Rose shook her head. "I want to go out on Nua."
Polly put the brush down and looked at Rose with a frown.
"I'm not sure that's the best thing for you right now, Rose. You look exhausted."
"Aunt Pol, it's the absolute best thing for me. I haven't ridden out on her for weeks and weeks. I need to go."
Polly sighed. "I'm not going to be able to stop you, am I?"
Rose was already on her way to the wardrobe to get her riding jacket. "No, Aunt Pol."
"Well, don't go far and be back before dinner."
"I will."
Rose hurried down the back stairs and out of the back door to get to the stables, Fred on her heels. She didn't want to bump into anyone. Nua heard her coming before she saw her and stuck her head out of her stall, whinnying and tossing her head in anticipation. Rose saw her and ran to greet her, opening the door of the stall to join her inside. She ran her hand over Nua's neck and down her soft nose. She laughed as the filly snorted in her neck, blowing her hair. She whispered in Nua's ear and pulled her fingers through her mane.
"Shall we go out, girl? Hmm, as far as we can?"
"I knew you'd be down here before long."
The voice made her jump and turn round. It was Mal. Her heart leapt when she saw him but she held back. She smiled at him quickly then turned back to Nua.
"Hello Mal."
Mal leaned on the stall door. "It's really good to see you back, Rose. I was worried about you."
She nodded, busying herself with Nua. Mal frowned at her coldness but put it down to the fact that she'd been through a lot. He still didn't know the whole story. No doubt his father would tell him soon.
"You going out? Want me to saddle her up?"
"Just the bridle, please. And I can do that myself."
"Right-o. Want me to ride out with you?"
"No thank you, Mal. I'd prefer to be alone."
Another frown. "Right then, I'll go and get that bridle."
Ten minutes later, Rose was cantering across the lower field, Fred running beside her, bent on putting the house out of her sight. Mal watched her go and wished he could be with her. Her absence had solidified his feelings for her and it was all his father could to do keep him from hunting for her himself when she was missing. Now that she was back, he was loathe to let her out of his sight again.
Rose kicked Nua on and galloped towards the forest, enjoying the wind in her hair and the feel of the horse beneath her. She had missed this. Slowing to a walk as Nua picked her way through the trees, Rose thought about Mal. She felt bad that she'd been so cold with him but she was wary of letting anyone get close to her anymore. Alfie had meant the world to her and she'd trusted him implicitly She would never have thought that he would lie to her and hurt her the way he had. It devastated her. If Alfie could do something like that to her, then others could too. Who could she trust? Surely no one.
Reaching the edge of the forest, Rose moved Nua up the hill on the other side. Walking along the ridge, Rose could see the house in the distance but chose to look the other way, down the other side towards the village she could see in the beyond the boundaries of Tommy's land. Coleshill. She pulled Nua to a halt and Fred flopped to the ground, panting. He was exhausted and glad Rose had stopped. As she gazed down at the village, she wondered if she had time to go down and check. She'd done it many times in the past. She decided she did have time. Looking down at Fred, she realised she'd made him run longer than she should have. She patted Nua's back in front of her.
"Come on, Fred, jump up. Come on."
Fred stood up and took a running jump at the horse and just about landed in front of Rose who grabbed hold of him to steady him. Once he was settled, she held on to him, pulled the reins round and moved Nua towards the village. Reaching the small woods on the outskirts of the village, she jumped down and secured Nua's reins to a tree branch.
"You stay with her, Fred. You hear? Stay!"
Rose made her way along the tree line until she reached the place she had stood many times before. Concealed behind a couple of trees, she watched and waited. The house was as familiar to her as Arrow House. She'd been inside a number of times when it was empty, hunting for letters, an address, a phone number. She'd never found anything though. As she watched, thinking about the many times she'd come away with nothing, the front door opened and a woman stepped out of the house. Not the elderly woman she'd been expecting, but a younger, very familiar woman. Rose gasped as she stared at Alice, her former maid. The maid she'd thought was a friend. The maid who'd betrayed her to Father Hughes. The maid who was responsible for handing Rose over to the most evil men who had ever lived. Rose watched her walk down the garden path and turn down the road until she was out of sight. She had waited for this moment for a long time. She knew that Alice's mother lived in Coleshill, so she'd watch the house regularly to see if Alice appeared. Alice knew better than to return home after what had happened and had moved away but Rose knew that she would visit her mother one day. So she waited. Rose was never quite sure what she would do if she ever saw her betrayer again, but she had imagined many scenarios when she would take revenge on the maid who had ruined her life. Moving her eyes back over the house, Rose turned abruptly and returned to Nua.
All evening, she formulated her plan. She smiled and she chatted and she drank her champagne with the family. She nodded in agreement when Arthur told Tommy to take some time off. She sat next to Ada at the table and enjoyed her company as they ate. She rolled her eyes at Bonnie's attempts to impress her and danced with Arthur as Johnny Dogs played his fiddle. But all the while, she planned and plotted and bided her time until the house went quiet and everyone slept and the moon was half concealed by dark clouds.
It was a long way to Coleshill, especially in the dark, but Rose didn't dare take Nua. Mal slept above the stables and he would have heard her hooves on the cobbles. So Rose made her way steadily to the village on foot. She'd left Fred in her room, to his immense annoyance. She didn't want him to give her away and she knew, somehow, that he wouldn't approve of what she was about to do. Reaching the edge of the woods eventually, Rose stopped and surveyed the village. It was quiet, the residents fast asleep and Rose was satisfied that she wouldn't be seen. She made her way to the town's only garage and broke in quietly through a back window which had been left slightly ajar. There was no crime in this village – not with the leader of the Peaky Blinders himself living next door. She found what she wanted quickly enough and left by a side door, carrying it with her carefully.
Reaching Alice's mother's house, she opened the back gate and put down what she was carrying quietly on the ground next to the kitchen door. Trying the handle, she wasn't surprised to find it was unlocked. Walking silently into the kitchen, Rose headed towards the front door and tried it. This door was locked so she left it that way, took the key out of the lock and slipped in into her pocket. Turning round, she stopped at the foot of the stairs and looked up, listening. She wanted to go up and shake Alice awake and tell her just how much she hated her. She wanted to tell her what those men had done to her and to make sure she knew that it was her fault. She wanted to tell her that she was done being betrayed; that from now on she'd be the one in control; that no one would take advantage of her again. But instead she turned and walked out of the kitchen door where she picked up the can of petrol she'd left outside. Back inside, Rose quietly poured the petrol over everything she could find that was flammable. She soaked the bottom few stairs and the bannister well. When the can was empty, she left it in the kitchen and took something out of her pocket. It was a crisp white handkerchief with an intricately embroidered rose in one corner and the initials RS in the other. She looked at it in disdain, then bent down and soaked a corner of it in the petrol which had pooled on the floor. Standing up, she went and stood by the open back door and took her lighter out of her pocket. The lighter that John had given her for her birthday, decorated with blue enamel. Flicking it open she lit it and held it to the corner of the handkerchief which caught fire immediately. She stared at the flame for a split second, her face illuminated in the firelight, then dropped it quickly on the floor. It caught immediately and Rose couldn't help but gasp at the speed of the fire as it rushed across the kitchen floor. She hurried out of the door and locked it behind her with the key she had taken from it earlier.
Standing at the edge of the back garden, Rose watched as the house caught fire. She watched the flames dancing in the windows, then saw the smoke begin to pour from the every crevice. She was half expecting the neighbours to come rushing over with a shout but nothing happened, the street remained quiet and Rose was the only witness. She tilted her head up and looked at the upstairs window. She knew that was Alice's room. She also knew that the upstairs windows didn't open. It was an old house and the wood on the sash windows had swollen so that they no longer moved.
And as she watched, two hands suddenly appeared on the glass, banging and hitting it, trying desperately to open it or break the glass. She waited for Alice's terrified face to appear and when it did, she watched impassively as the young woman silently screamed for help, as she coughed and cowered by the window. Rose stepped forward into the light of the flames, keeping her eyes on Alice, wanting her to see her, to know exactly who had done this. She felt the intense heat from the fire and it made her wince. Then Alice spotted her and froze for a second, recognising her. Her face lit up and she hammered on the window, signaling to Rose for help. Rose stood, unmoving, her eyes locked on Alice, her expression cold and unrelenting. She reached in her pocket and took out her cigarette case. With her eyes still on Alice, she took a cigarette, then lit the lighter and held it in her hand for a moment before lighting her cigarette. Alice's face was filled with horror as she realised what Rose had done. The youngest Shelby slowly blew out the smoke from her cigarette, then deliberately turned her back on Alice and disappeared into the trees.