Harry potter and the Time of Retirement

Everything related to Harry Potter belongs to JKR

Chapter 55 – Year 3

Dinner had started, and conversation was flowing easily - between Lupin and Black. The two men seemed to instantly retreat into their own world, talking about previous Yuletides spent together, joke presents they had done to each other or their friends, and complaints about the holidays never lasting enough for all of their plans.

Sitting in front of them on the other side of a large table were Dumbledore and Harry. The old headmaster was talking quietly, limiting himself to comments about the food being served that night or the season in general. Harry, a light smile on his face and an even subtler roll of his eyes here and there, answered as politely as he could. His expression showed his boredom, though.

It was well into their second dish, when the conversation between Harry and Dumbledore had been almost dead for a while, that Lupin looked forward and addressed them.

"I fear we have been a little rude so far, Padfoot" he started, smiling. "This was supposed to be a group dinner. How is it going over there? Do you like your food, Harry?"

"As Kreacher's creations are not poisoned, they go beyond my expectations. My muggle dishes are tasty, too" said Harry, dryly.

"Yeah, Kreacher has always been a little unpleasant, I fear" commented Lupin, turning again towards Sirius. "Always been, even when we were students."

"Took after my parents" added Sirius, amused. "Maybe they should have adopted him."

"Nevertheless" continued Lupin "everything is good, just not as good as it is in Hogwarts. I really missed your presence there, Harry."

"Did you?" asked Harry, lightly, while sipping his glass. "We never met before."

"Well, sure" chuckled Lupin. "We didn't, but I was still happy at the idea of James's son being my student. And now that I see you, I miss the opportunity even more. You really resemble him."

"Except his eyes" added Sirius "Those come from dear old Lily."

"Yes, the wonders of genetics" said Harry, only to notice a couple of blank stares around him. "Muggle sciences. The wonders of blood ties, if you prefer."

"I do" said Sirius, shaking his head. "I keep pestering him to go back to Hogwarts, but it's like talking to a wall, or James after the summer break. He just doesn't want to do it."

"Kids can be like that sometimes" said Lupin, nodding. "Headstrong as mules. You should see some of my younger students, in class."

Harry sighed, and turned towards Dumbledore. "Aren't you going to join in, headmaster? You too could gossip on me like if I wasn't sitting at this table."

"They mean well, Harry, we all do" answered the headmaster, blandly. "And I most certainly agree with them. I am sure your tutors too would agree with them" he concluded, a bit sternly.

"Who, the Dursleys? They were jubilant when I told them I was leaving, and told me never to come back. As far as I know, I am on my own" said Harry.

"Maybe you shouldn't have left, then" said Sirius. "Mind you, now that you did you could come and live here."

"No, he could go back to school" said Lupin, firmly.

"It might be about time" added Dumbledore.

Harry snorted with derision, and abandoned his cutlery on the table. "Merry Christmas, indeed."

"We can talk about your return later. What are you doing lately, Harry? Are you following the study plan prepared by professor Sprout?" moved on Dumbledore.

"Right" added Lupin. "You can ask me if there are parts of Defense that you don't understand. Send me an owl whenever you need to."

"I never saw him doing his homework when I went and visit James' house. Lily would be horrified" commented Sirius.

"Yes, she was terrible during our last year. And I thought I took studying seriously" said Lupin, amused. "Good thing those two started dating only then, and not before."

As Lupin and Black restarted gossiping about old times, Dumbledore addressed Harry again. "To be honest, I would love to visit you at your parents' house, Harry. See how you were doing before your return back to school next month."

Harry frowned, and cleaned his mouth with the table napkin. "It's not theirs anymore" he finally commented, standing up. "It's mine, and I enjoy living in it. I am going to the bathroom."

Harry walked out of the room, and did walk to the house bathroom, washing his hands and face inside there. His expression, though, was tense and his eyes narrow.

Walking out, he looked at the main hallway and, after a second of hesitation and a shrug, moved towards the front door. A voice stopped him immediately.

"Are you leaving without saying goodbye, Harry? It is a bit rude, I fear" said Dumbledore, standing peacefully next to the, still closed, door for the living room.

"After the spectacle from before, I hardly feel guilty" said Harry, barely turning his head. "Don't any of you know what subtlety is?"

"Maybe we are too used to ordering little kids around, true" admitted Dumbledore, pleasantly. "But boys needs to be told what to do, for their own good. Harry, you are no exception."

"So I have been told, tonight. Repeatedly" countered Harry, shaking his head and taking one step more towards the main door. "Have a nice rest of the dinner, sir."

"Wait, please. Listen one last time, out of courtesy or respect, you choose" said Dumbledore. Harry sighed, and turned around. "Go ahead".

"I regret now pushing you away from Hogwarts" started Dumbledore, sadly. "I was shocked by your behavior, and hoped you would fold when faced with the idea of not being able to come back. In hindsight, not a brilliant decision."

"You also said you have duties towards the other students, headmaster" said Harry. "Am I no longer a threat, then?"

"To yourself, you are. Your talents, wherever they come from, needs to be managed. Beside, you are not safe in your father's, no, your home. Unpleasant as she might be, you must live with your aunt until you are of age."

"Haven't you learned anything since when a young Riddle begged you not to be forced back to his orphanage?" commented Harry, disgusted. "Or after decades of teaching you dismiss whatever your students complains about as trivial?"

"How would you even know that?" asked Dumbledore, stunned, before recomposing himself. "Oh, of course. Silly me. Harry, there is no way what you… received, is healthy for a boy of your age."

"I can manage. Is that all, sir?"

"No, not all" continued Dumbledore. "I heard about your current life from Mr. Black. Don't act like you are happier now than you were at Hogwarts, among the other Hufflepuffs. All I offer is a hand to manage whatever problems you have. To prevent more suffering, the kind your poor friend Ginny went through."

"I told you already I have my own opinion on what happened with her" said Harry, venomously. His old feelings of guilt were back, though, and he sighed. "Ok, listen. I wanted to talk to you too, I guess. I do need help with something. But this attitude of yours is more irritating than anything."

"As I said already, I am willing to listen if you are willing to talk. But good will must flow from both sides" said Dumbledore, slightly offended.

"Sure, whatever. Send me an owl in the coming days, and we can set something up."

"I would appreciate if we do it as soon as possible, Harry. The new term starts in less than two weeks after all. Will you be available later tonight?" asked Dumbledore.

"I am free right now" said Harry, rolling his eyes. "Though I wouldn't mind finishing my dinner, back home."

"Come back to the living room, and eat with us. We have been absent quite a while, I am sure our host and Mr. Lupin will be more accommodating."

"Sure, I can imagine" said Harry, frowning. "We might have offended Harry, but Dumbledore calmed him down so let's not tease him anymore. Condescension, packed in a new box."

"Not everyone is out to get you, my boy. Don't you want your presents?" asked Dumbledore. Harry snorted, quite loudly, at this.

"Yes, that's my cue to leave. Please send my regards to those two morons. If you were serious, see you in an hour or so."

"Have it your way, then. Once more. See you soon, Harry" concluded Dumbledore, abruptly, before turning around.

Silently, Harry walked on and reached the main door. Feeling the stares of Mrs. Black on him, Harry launched a comment in the air. "Maybe you have a point with your son, after all."

"I do, but any Black is still better than a Potter brat" said the portrait, haughtily.

Harry frowned even more, and finally scoffed with disdain. Swallowing back whatever he was about to say, he finally left the manor.

A couple hours later, a book in his hand and two cups of tea with biscuits next to him, Harry was relaxing or at least trying to. Technically, the room was quite cozy: a small fire burned in the fireplace, lighting up the room. His tea was good, the biscuits sweet. And yet his stares, sent quite regularly towards the door, showed how his mind was set on something else.

Eventually, a knock could be heard from the front door. With a gesture of his hand the door, already unlocked, opened and Harry simply stated "Come in."

"By your leave" said Dumbledore, stepping in. Walking to the center of the living room, he looked all around himself, a smile on his face. "I haven't been in this house for years. Poor James and Lily, my old friends. So young and optimistic."

"Old friends? They were two youngsters barely out of your school" said Harry, almost casually.

"Friendship can blossom even with large age differences" commented placidly the headmaster. "I hope we, too, can be friends."

"My definition of friendships is quite less elastic, I fear" said Harry. "It involves two peers that enjoy spending time together just for the pleasure of it."

"Of course" said Dumbledore, smiling quietly. "May I?" he asked, waving at a chair. At Harry's nod, he sat down.

"I have been asked, also, to offer Mr. Black and Mr. Lupin's sympathies for your sudden stomach ache. They hope you will recover soon, and they already invite you back at Grimmauld's place tomorrow, to pick up your presents" said Dumbledore.

"They are not that stupid, nor am I that forgiving. I expect better than a fake non-apology" said Harry, dismissive, as he offered one of the cups of tea. Dumbledore, nonplussed, didn't comment and slowly picked it up, taking a sip before placing it back on the table and relaxing.

"I am listening, Harry. Explain to me whatever you feel is needed to get you back under proper tutelage at Hogwarts."

Harry sighed, and shook his head. "I tried for a long time to avoid this" he murmured, almost to no one, before steeling his expression. "You are not here for something so trivial, Mr. Dumbledore. I wanted to discuss your star pupil, Riddle, and how to put it down for good."

Dumbledore, to his credit, didn't seem too surprised – though he remained silent for a while. Finally, he spoke, none of his usual friendliness in his voice. "What do you mean, Harry? What do you know?"

"Well, he lives; as some kind of wraith, for now. I met him two years ago, while he possessed professor Quirrell. The meeting was not peaceful, as you know."

"What I know that professor Quirrell has been murdered" countered Dumbledore, a dark expression on his face. His next words were said in a low, menacing tone. "And you are all but admitting you did it."

"I am all but admitting that I fought desperately to stay alive, as another poor sucker was sacrificed for Riddle's ambitions to power. Like my parents, like too many families" said Harry, frowning. "The point is, if you want to do anything about it."

"I could stun you now, and take you to the aurors. Have you take responsibility for your actions."

"You could try, sure. If you succeed, inside my house and my wards, or if I would at least manage to escape is debatable" said Harry, raising his eyebrows in sarcasm. "I had hopes, though, that you would focus more on the core issue so I'll try again. Riddle is alive, strong enough to influence events. There is little time left before he walks the ground again."

Dumbledore, stone faced, sat still on his chair. Probably deep in thoughts on how to manage the situation. Eventually, he all but ordered Harry. "Tell me what happened with professor Quirrell. All of it."

"He showed a bizarre interest in me, from his first class. Subtle, but noticeable. And, for various reasons, I thought he was the one that tried to kill me pushing me over the stairs at Hogwarts, if you remember that incident" started Harry, as Dumbledore remained immobile.

"Long story short, I placed a sleeping potion in his classroom and then tried to stun and capture him. I failed, and got overwhelmed pretty quickly. Mid way, Riddle appeared and offered me submission, in exchange for power or something."

"I hope you refused" commented Dumbledore, acidly.

"You hope right" said Harry, aggressively. "I think he wanted me alive in that moment, if I have to judge by the curses Quirrell casts. I won the magical side of the duel, barely, but Quirrell managed to grapple me. Killing him was my only way out, so I did."

"I can tell you are overwhelmed with remorse" said Dumbledore, just a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"Life is precious, headmaster" countered Harry, his voice no less sarcastic. "Mine in particular, if you ask me."

"Not if I ask Quirrell" said Dumbledore. "What happened then?"

"Riddle rose from the corpse, offering submission once more. I didn't take it well, and I might have insulted him way more than necessary" commented Harry, with a self-satisfied smirk on his face. "I fear he is slightly upset with me, now."

Dumbledore nodded, gathering his thoughts. "And then he fled, I assume" he said, with Harry nodding in turn. "Good. But he must still be out there, somehow alive. The real question is, how? Do you know that, too?"

"I do" said Harry. "He used a ritual to splinter his soul, creating anchors for it through items named, I think, Horcrux. Are you familiar with them?"

Dumbledore frowned, and glared at Harry. "I read some references to them, yes. Enough to disgust me away. You don't seem to have the same problem."

"Could you please get off your high horse, sir? This is serious" complained Harry, irritated. "Let me tell you, once and for all, what my values are. We can debate all day about morality because we share the same core assumption. That violence is a last resort method, that we should solve our problems with words."

"Do you really think that, Harry? Do you?" asked Dumbledore, skeptical.

"Of course I do!" stated Harry, hotly. ""Not that I hate the idea of punching in the face those that annoys me, but I am not insane. If we start killing each other over our disagreements, all we can hope for is a graveyard. The problem lies with those that see death as the first option."

"Like Voldemort. And yet you said you want to, how did you phrase it, put him down."

"Because, with someone that wants to kill you, there can't be a discussion anymore" insisted Harry. "We can't debate with Riddle, because he doesn't want to. We can only kill him, for our safety. For everyone's safety. Are you ok with that or not?"

"I most certainly do not. He too should be reformed, if possible. Or, at worst, put in Azkaban" said Dumbledore.

"Fine" conceded Harry, exasperated. "With his crimes he will get the Kiss anyway, good enough for me."

Dumbledore remained silent, once again. His face continued to remain hostile. Eventually, he sighed.

"I can tell we will never agree on our deeper values, Harry" he said, sadness in his tone. "But, if you have been honest so far, it is true that we can agree to disagree, peacefully. That path might no longer be open with Tom. What do you want from me, then?"

"I want you to help. I know where most of those items are, but I am unsure if I could take them out by myself. You could, with my advice. And there is more."

"There always is. What?" asked Dumbledore, tiredly.

"The horcruxes, if that is their right name, are not that relevant" claimed Harry. As Dumbledore frowned and seemed to be preparing to interrupt him, he rose a hand to stop him. "I am not saying they are not a threat, only that they are not an immediate threat. They could be dealt with in time. The only thing I care about is Riddle."

"He can't be, sorry to raise the point again, put down so long as even one of those cursed items exist, though" commented Dumbledore.

"Plenty of Dementors would be happy to test that statement, I hope" said Harry. "Nevertheless, there are other options. We could capture the wraith, if it is even possible. Or wait until he is mid-way recreating a body, and capture him then. Actually, shaming him before death would go a long way in healing our community."

"I strongly doubt humiliating their former leader in public would make his old followers more amenable to our ideas" said Dumbledore, unconvinced.

"Our ideas? I am not doing this for any political idea" said Harry, acidly, as Dumbledore frowned once again. "All I want them to understand is that their chosen method was unacceptable. Having Riddle in front of the Wizengamot to answer for the pain he caused, his long list of crimes, could force people to understand how his violence brought destruction and not change."

"Easier said than done" said Dumbledore.

"True" admitted Harry "Still worth trying."

After a moment of hesitation, Dumbledore seemed to recover all his willpower, almost growing larger in the process. With a focused expression, he looked at Harry straight in the eyes. "There is much to prepare for. Let's start with…"

And so it was that a tense, hostile conversation began and went on long into the night. Dumbledore expected the full list of Horcruxes and Harry described at length how dangerous they were and how lethal some of the traps protecting them could be. With some hesitation, he described the cursed cave where only a fake medallion of Slytherin was placed. He wasn't supposed to know about the substitution after all, according to Dumbledore, which made it even more important to make sure that the man wouldn't die recovering it.

In this, he exhausted even Dumbledore's patience – the man didn't enjoy being warned, times and times again in a row, to take those traps as seriously as possible.

"That is enough!" said Dumbledore, stressed. "No offense, but what seems impressive to you is probably within my capabilities to manage. I got it, there are plenty of compulsion charms near these items. Move on."

"That attitude is why I am worried" countered Harry. "These are traps set by one of the most talented wizards of the century, aimed at the weak points of those who tries to loot his items. It's not simply a compulsion charm, be less arrogant."

"That's rich coming from you, young Harry" commented Dumbledore, only a hint of sarcasm in his voice. "I am half expecting you to offer to pick them up personally, just to show me you can."

"I have little interest in that kind of di…drinking contest" said Harry, scoffing. "And your death would be catastrophic, so let's try to avoid it, eh? If you want an honest advice, use controlled animals as proxies."

"I can do better than that" said Dumbledore, dismissive. "Move on!"

After that, the old headmaster wanted a more detailed retelling of his meetings with Riddle, both against Quirrell and in the Chamber of Secrets. He showed some attention towards Harry's choice of spells and curses, insisting those should not be within any young boy's skill set.

"What is obvious, I fear, is the obsession Riddle seemed to focus on you even in his younger form" said Dumbledore. "There must be something in the similarities between you two that draws him in."

"Those similarities are strictly in his imagination" countered Harry, stiffly. "My parents loved each other, and neither of them was a muggle. I am their legitimate son while he is, as I just loved to remind him, an inbred bastard."

"Our bloodline doesn't determine our fate" scolded Dumbledore, harshly. "We are what we make of ourselves."

"Nature versus nurture, headmaster" insisted Harry, shrugging. "We are also what we are born with, there is no avoiding that."

"Again, we must agree to disagree" concluded Dumbledore, coldly. "There is one last topic I want to examine. Do you have any idea on how he could become corporeal again?"

Harry sighed, and started another unpleasant topic. Mere hints on creating some kind of initial receptacle for his soul, and a full on description of the ritual that could be involved in restoring him a full body. Dumbledore showed some disappointment for the lack of details.

"An ancestor, a servant, an enemy" he commented. "Symbolically, I can see how their forced submission would work into restoring a dead leader to life. But there must be plenty more to that than the ritual words."

"And yet this is all I have to offer" said Harry, grimacing. "I don't have a copy of his mind into mine."

"Or maybe you just can't comprehend what you have" suggested the old man. "If only you would let me read your memories…."

"If only you would stop demanding that" countered Harry, irritated. "The answer was, is and will always be no. Period."

"I have little doubts what you know is unpleasant" said Dumbledore, unsure "but it could also be priceless in what I hope I can call, at least, our joint attempt to stop him. I swear I am not interested in the details of your private life."

"As if anyone would" said Harry. "I have my reasons, and that's it. I don't have to justify my desire for privacy."

Dumbledore frowned, but after a second seemed to let it go. "Very well... for now. I have enough to work with, anyway. What about you, Harry? Are you planning to help somehow?"

"I can't imagine how, or even why. You are the Mugwump and all that, sir, you can gather informations and solicit help from a whole team of competent professors. It's your generation's problem" said Harry, dismissive.

"I wonder what your parents would say about that. Not much older than you are, they took responsibility for our future until…" said Dumbledore, hesitating only at the end.

"Until they died uselessly" scoffed Harry. "Maybe I just want you to do your self-appointed job and take care of this mess for once, instead of asking school children to solve it for you."

"I never asked you or your classmates to solve any of my duties, ever. Where did this barb even came from?" asked Dumbledore, half irritated half puzzled, as Harry grimaced.

"Nevermind. I might do my part, eventually. There is something that allows me to stall Riddle in any open duel, if it comes to that, and it's not an empty claim. If it ever comes to that."

"The power he knows not?" asked Dumbledore, eyes narrowing.

"Oh, right, the prophecy" said Harry. "One possible interpretation of many, all equally debatable. And this reminds me..." he continued, his tone turning icy. "There is something I have been itching to say for a year, now, and I finally can".

"A complaint, I am sure" said quietly Dumbledore, almost amused.

"Damn right it is. The prophecy, I know how it reached Riddle. He killed my parents and Pettygrew opened the door, sure, but it is Snape that doomed them" said Harry, venomous. "And you had the gall to order me I should respect him as a man and a professor? By heaven, you still dare to lecture me on morality?"

Dumbledore went silent at the accusation, and picked up once again his cup of tea, taking another sip. After a while, he placed it down and spoke on.

"For once, his sins are not mine, nor do they excuse yours" he started with. "But yes, I'll admit that might have been insensitive from me."

Harry just scowled and watched the headmaster with resentment, clearly unconvinced.

"He might always looks guilty in your eyes but he went to great lengths to make up for what he did, at great risks for his life. That must count for something, even to you" concluded Dumbledore.

"If he acted out of genuine regret I might forgive him, sure" said Harry, quietly. "But, knowing both sides of the story, I am confident he betrayed the man he called master, his friends and all his ideals only because of his unhealthy obsession with my mother."

"Not even you can know that" said Dumbledore, troubled.

"I am not naïve" countered Harry. "Snape is a wretched excuse for both a man and a professor, and this time I will not tolerate any contradiction."

"I see" said Dumbledore. "I see there is no point in trying to overcome your prejudices towards him. Which will make what I must now do even more unpleasant."

Instantly wary and mentally checking his wand, his wards and what spells might allow him to run if needed, Harry waited for Dumbledore to continue.

"I am grateful for what you have revealed tonight" began the headmaster "but all that makes it even more essential you came back to school. And this time, I am the one which will tolerate no contradictions."

"After what I just said, you still dare" commented Harry, not letting his mental guard down. "You don't care in the slightest, do you?"

"Oh, I will have a long talk with professor Snape and he will no longer provoke you undeservedly, I promise" said Dumbledore "but you are coming back. And we must patch things up with your aunt, so that you might live with her again during school breaks. It's necessary, and you will do it."

"Or what?" asked Harry.

"Or I will go to the minister of Magic, reveal part of what you confessed, and pursue an official tutelage of you as a way of saving you from Azkaban" said Dumbledore, sternly. "If you won't listen to reason, I will get the right to force you."

"Listen to your reasons, you mean" said Harry. "And how do you justify forcing me like this, anyway? Is your vaunted morality just a façade?"

"You are a troubled young man, helping you even against your will does not bother me in the slightest" said Dumbledore, shaking his head. "I am sorry it has come to this, of course, but…."

"Sorry doesn't cut it" said Harry, interrupting him. "And blackmail is a dangerous weapon. One you should be careful it will not turned against yourself."

"There are plenty of actions I regret in my long life" said Dumbledore, shrugging. "But none over which you can blackmail me. The perks of being an honest person."

"Have it your way, then" said Harry, standing up. "After this, unfortunately, I must insist you get out of my house."

"It is quite late, true" said Dumbledore with a small nod, standing up himself. "I am sure you are angry at me now, but it will pass. You will be safe and happy at Hogwarts, as you should be."

As Dumbledore moved towards the door, Harry remained behind. "One last thing, though" he said just as the old wizard was reaching for the door handle.

Dumbledore turned, smiling awkwardly. "I think we said everything for tonight, Harry. You are mature enough, please don't disappoint me with insults or empty threats."

"You decide how empty it is. You are guilty of encouraging Grindewald on his maniacal war on both wizardly and muggle sides of the world. Possibly murdering your sister Ariana in the process."

At this, Dumbledore lost his smile and paled considerably. After a couple seconds an expression of true anger crossed his face, something Harry could barely remember ever seeing on who probably was, he felt then more than ever, the most powerful wizard alive. He took one more step back, hand getting closer to his wand, as Dumbledore pointed his finger at him.

"How do you even kn…" he started, only to stop midway.

"The how is obvious" said Harry, quietly. "The real question is, why. The answer is, because Riddle was searching for the Elder Wand. Your wand."

"How many people know about all this?!" demanded Dumbledore, taking one more step forward. Harry, clearly intimidated, took one step back and pushed open the door to the kitchen behind him, while still not backing down completely.

"How many people now or after you blackmail me into Hogwarts?" he asked, harshly.

Dumbledore almost snarled at the implied threat, and his hand moved slightly towards his own pocket – making Harry walk one more step backwards, placing him out of the living room then. The sight seemed to calm Dumbledore, at least on the surface.

"Now" he finally hissed.

"No one else but him, me and Grindewald himself" said Harry. "I assume he hopes to loot it from your corpse, so he never revealed this to anyone. For what I know."

Dumbledore nodded, clearly relieved. His eyes then refocused to Harry. "You are playing with things vastly beyond your age, Harry Potter."

"I am sorry it has come to this" countered Harry, tauntingly. "But I might be a troubled young man, and helping myself against your will doesn't bother me at all."

"Very funny" commented Dumbledore. "And you suppose it will simply end like this?"

"I am trying to live peacefully on my own" answered Harry with a small shrug of his shoulders. "It's not a sin. Quirrell tried to kill me, Percy tried to kill me, you are trying to blackmail me. Excuse my French but bugger Hogwarts, honestly."

Dumbledore scoffed, angry. "At this point, the feeling is almost reciprocal. I will be contacting you again, Harry, count on that."

"By all means, my door is always open for you" said Harry, stone faced, watching as Dumbledore finally turned around and left the house, leaving the door open behind himself. Heart racing, Harry closed it with a wave of his hand, not yet daring to approach the entrance.

Taking some tentative steps back into the living room, Harry cautiously rose the curtains and looked outside of the windows. No one was in sight. This partially helped in calming his nerves.

"What a night" he murmured, finally locking the door. 'I am willing to bet he was really tempted to curse me'.

Giving one final look at the door before climbing the stairs to his bedroom, he wished deep inside that he could barricade it. 'Both Riddle and Dumbledore. My list of friends grows' he finally thought, with a small smirk.