Despite the early morning light filtering in from the gray sky, Mount Ordeals was a dreary and miserable place. Several trees grew on the mountainside, but they were not heavy with lush greenery as Baron's forest was, but instead bore bare branches reaching bony fingers up, forlornly grasping for some intangible thing. No birds flew overhead, creating an eerily silent atmosphere.
"Here," Rosa offered Kain the canteen and a piece of hard tack. He took both and found the canteen two-thirds full. Rosa was chewing on her food, looking out toward the horizon, her eyes unfocused in thought.
Kain ate his slowly, silently observing Rosa and her supplies. He drank from the canteen, gulping down half of what was left.
"Three potions, three meal rations, and..." he shook the canteen, swishing around the one-third that was left, "...water split three ways. You planned for all three of us."
Rosa looked back at him, her eyes refocusing. "Why do you seem so surprised?" she asked, sounding hurt.
"I need to stop underestimating you," Kain admitted quietly, feeling suddenly shamed. He'd been so consumed by his desire to put Rosa out of harm's way that he never considered he might need both her skills and resourceful mind to survive. "I'm sorry," he added.
"We'll split the rest tonight," Rosa said as she knelt, beginning to pack everything into a small bag. "Hopefully we'll find more in the supply caches." She seemed content to ignore both the comment and the apology, so Kain said nothing more, only nodding to her words as he continued to chew.
When he finished eating, Kain went to his armor, laid out in a line by Rosa the night before. It seemed suddenly heavier as he put each piece on, as if the mountain's aura made his father's armor harder to bear. He shook his head at the thought, trying to dispel it.
As he was armoring himself, he looked up to see Rosa standing at the edge of the safety ward, looking back across the bridge that separated their small safe island from the rest of the dangerous mountain. The wind tugged at her loose hair, streaming gold behind her. She looked back over her shoulder at Kain; worry knit her brow, blue eyes full of concern, wordlessly asking again, Can we do this?
Can you do this? Cecil asked from Kain's memory, the last words Cecil had spoken before Kain's fateful Jump from the ship. Cecil hadn't just meant the Jump itself, but a thousand other demands in the small question: Could Kain keep Rosa protected? Could he get her off Mount Ordeals? Could he bring Rosa back to Cecil, whole and unharmed? There had been so much trust in the question, a hopefulness that Kain could do all those things because he knew how much Cecil loved Rosa.
Kain needed to do this, not just for Rosa's own sake, but because Cecil had asked and Kain could never refuse him.
"Save your fire arrows and magic as much as you can," Kain said as he lifted his helmet, then lowered it over his head. He peered at her from the dragon's eyes. "If we move carefully, we can ambush any undead we come across and put them down before they can attack." He picked up his lance, considering it carefully. "I can't Jump, but I can still fight."
Rosa reached over her shoulder into her quiver, pulling out a regular arrow. She set it in her bow, holding it loosely in her hands. He wondered if her fingers twitched with anticipation the way his did when he reached for his weapon, and if they yearned for an arrow or magic. "Ready," Rosa said, her voice neutral.
With Kain leading, they left the safety ward.
They encountered their first zombie soon after crossing the bridge. Walking lightly, their footsteps as quiet as possible, they came across the zombie shambling along ahead of them on the path. Rosa held out a hand for Kain to halt his approach and gestured in a circle. Kain nodded in understanding, moving slowly around in a wide circle, inching closer to the zombie's side. Rosa took aim with her arrow, made brief eye contact with Kain to confirm his placement, then fired.
The arrow flew and sank deep into the decaying flesh of the zombie's right shoulder. Dumbly, the zombie looked up, its rotting eyes catching sight of Rosa. With a groan, it threw itself in a slow turn, arms first, dragging its feet along as it ambled awkwardly toward Rosa.
Kain raised his lance, then struck, sinking its tip the zombie's soft skull, the bone quickly crumbling around the weapon. The zombie stumbled forward, spilling out its soupy brains as it fell to the ground.
"Easy enough," Rosa said with a confident smile. Kain was grateful to see it.
Not all their encounters were so easy.
They encountered a Soul, floating in the branches of a dead tree, looking like a small yellow cloud. It spotted them and screamed, throwing the haunting sound into the still air around them.
Rosa cursed under her breath, dropping her bow to the ground with a clatter. She clasped her hands together and lowered her head, murmuring softly. The air around her hummed with magic as she gathered it to her.
The Soul surged toward them, and Kain stepped out in front of Rosa to meet it with his drawn lance. The Soul shrieked something unintelligible, its yellow aura growing more intense as magic erupted around it. Kain shuddered as coldness ran through him, leaving behind a terrible but brief pain in its wake, reminding sharply him of the death of his father. It filled him with an unexpected grief, raw and fresh, as if Richard's death was only yesterday.
Rosa's spell came down on them both, relieving Kain of the physical sting from the Soul's attack. The Soul, however, screamed in response, then dissolved in the holy light of Rosa's magic, its yellow aura evaporating into the wind. The grief lingered, however, making Kain's chest feel too tight and constrained in Richard's armor. Kain saw his father's face, but the skin started to peel away, revealing shining new red skin beneath, as Kain had seen on Wedge in the infirmary so many years ago. Death surrounded him, its insidious reach going as far back as Kain's infancy, when it claimed his mother.
Death is all I'm good for, the thought bubbled to the surface of Kain's mind.
Odin had been right – Kain would have made a formidable dark knight.
"Are you all right?" Rosa asked, as she bent to pick up her dropped weapon. When Kain did not answer her right away, she looked over, concerned. "Kain?" she prompted.
Kain shook his head, shaking the disturbing images of death from his mind, and focused on Rosa. "I'm fine," he said tightly.
"Mount Ordeals tests more than just your body and skills, but also your strength of mind," Rosa said with a surprising amount of sympathy. "Try not to dwell on any specific image or thought. These ghosts are wretched creatures full of anger, pain and regret. They will try to infect you as well. It will lead you to question every decision you've ever made. And if you allow that, it will drive you mad."
Kain did not speak, only grunted in reply, finding words difficult.
They continued.
Not all corpses on Mount Ordeals attacked them. Some stirred briefly at their passing, heads lifting slightly off the ground, watching them with unblinking, milky stares. At first, Kain drew his lance to attack one, but Rosa's hand on his elbow stopped him.
"Look," she whispered, nodding toward the zombie, which was sprawled out on the ground. It had been lying face down, but at their approach, it now was trying to push itself up, neck straining as its arms tried to brace on the ground. "The legs," she added.
Kain looked and saw now that the zombie's legs were mostly gone, leaving behind only deflated trouser legs where its lower limbs had been – no, there was something else, Kain realized, as he looked closer. In the rips of fabric, he saw the remains of its legs, the decaying muscle and skin a putrid mix of green, black, and wriggling white. Kain blinked hard, trying to clear his vision, then looked again, but the little dots of white were still wriggling.
"Maggots," Kain said, full of horror, trying to swallow down the rising bile of his stomach.
"The earth reclaims its own," Rosa said somberly. "It would be a kindness to put it out of its misery, but we need to conserve our strength and stamina."
Kain nodded, not trusting himself not to vomit if he opened his mouth.
Kain was not prepared when they came across the burnt tree.
It was an ominous sight, the tree's black twisted branches reaching uselessly up with blackened stumps, surrounded by piles of half-burnt corpses and ash. There were several other corpses around the tree, but these were not burnt, only unmoving.
Rosa approached one, knelt beside it, then pushed on its shoulder to roll it over, its face turned up to the sky. Kain now saw the handle of something sticking out from its eye. Rosa reached down, gripped the handle, and yanked it free with a horrible squelching sound. She leaned back, then wiped the blade clean on the corpse's shirt.
"What happened?" Kain asked, but knowing already, remembering the flashes from the night before: Rosa, against the burning backdrop, fiercely defending him from the encroaching shadows.
"We landed here," Rosa said softly as she stood, almost too quiet for him to hear. "There were too many of them for me to fight on my own." She looked over at the tree; there was no satisfaction or smugness as she continued, "The tree was dead and dry, so I set it on fire and maneuvered some into it." She glanced now at the corpse at her feet, gripping a familiar-looking knife tight in her hand. "The others I…." she hesitated, looking now at the knife, her face gone white. When she looked back up at Kain, there was a new hardness in her eyes. "I took care of them however I could."
Kain watched as she knelt again, then tucked the knife in her boot. Much later, he would wonder when Odin had given the knife to her and what oath he asked for in exchange, but for now, Kain could only stare at her and the scene around them in mute awe of what she had done to protect him.
"Thank you," he said, the words catching in his throat.
Rosa looked at him, surprised either by his words or the emotion in them. "Always," she said with a hint of a smile; it was like a brilliant ray of sunshine piercing through the dark morning fog. Following it, following her, perhaps they would survive.
Rosa found the first supply cache, in a chest as she'd described. As she lifted the chest's lid, Kain saw her eyes close briefly, and he wondered if she prayed. She reached in and pulled out a single Ether. She didn't curse or shout, only looked forlorn and disappointed.
"It will have to do," Rosa said, her voice small and resigned. She tucked the Ether into the bag, carefully, as if she was afraid to drop it. "We'll save the supplies for the descent tomorrow." She closed the chest. "Hopefully..." she said the word with emphasis, trying to resurrect her slowly dying optimism, "... the next chest has something more worthwhile."
"Hopefully," Kain repeated, hating the melancholy look on her face, wishing he could do something to make her smile again.
Rosa drew in a deep breath, turned away from the chest, to consider the open cliff behind them. It dropped off sharply to another ledge below. She peered down at the elevation; Kain guessed it to be fifteen or twenty feet down.
"The next chest is there." Rosa pointed, in the distance, to a set of man-made stairs leading upward to a natural ledge, carved out of the stone face of the mountain. "Most of the undead on Mount Ordeals have difficulty walking, so the stairs typically dissuade them from following. If we're lucky, it will contain more valuable supplies." She turned to face him. "If we climb down here, we'll bypass the road going east across to the other side of the mountain before it circles back to here. It'll save a lot of time and resources, but only if you can safely climb down." She looked down at his legs, then frowned. "What do you think?"
Kain bent his knees, not fully down into a Jump position, but enough to flex the familiar muscles in his legs. Feeling no pain or discomfort, he straightened back out. He peered over the edge, looking at the cliff face, and saw enough protruding stones that looked easy enough to grasp. Kain looked back to Rosa, who was waiting with expectant eyes.
"Well?" she prompted, sounding anxious.
"I can do it," Kain answered, trying to sound confident enough to assuage her worries. "But I'll go first. If I fall, I don't want to hit you on the way down."
Rosa frowned again but did not protest.
They took a few moments to secure their weapons to themselves; Kain's lance sheathed at his back, Rosa's bow looped around her chest and shoulders. Kain handed his gauntlets to Rosa, who put them in the supply bag. She checked the fit of the bag and tightened the straps that secured it to her belt, testing its new weight. Once she seemed satisfied, she looked up to Kain and nodded.
Kain knelt by the edge and looked down, trying to pick out the best way downward, with the most available hand holds. He settled on a spot, then went down to his chest and belly on the ground. He inched closer to the edge, then swung his legs over. He balanced there, precariously, until he was able to shift, angling his legs downward, the armored tips of his boots feeling around for something to stand on.
Eventually he eased his upper body down, fingers gripping the cliff's edge tightly. Then, he pulled one hand down, and found a jagged rock to grip. "Just like that," he told Rosa, who watched with increasing worry. "I'll help guide your feet, okay?" he said in the same reassuring tone Rosa used while caring for Cecil and Kain.
Kain made slow progress downward, moving only when he was certain of the next rock he was stepping on. If it could bear the weight of his armored body, then it would certainly hold for Rosa. Once there was room, Rosa came over the edge next, lowering herself down, her feet searching for a hold. Kain reached up and gripped one of her ankles, then guided her foot down to the edge of a rock sticking out from the stone face of the mountain.
Slow and cautious, they followed that pattern down the cliff face. With Kain finding the right stones to step on, and guiding Rosa down to follow in his steps. There was nothing of her childhood ego and insistence on doing something for herself, only the implicit trust that Kain knew where to go and how to get there.
Kain reached the bottom, grateful once his feet touched solid ground again. He reached up, to again guide Rosa's foot down to the next rock. Kain saw her right hand move uncertainly on its current grip, and then was surprised when the rock's edge suddenly snapped off from the pressure of her weight. Without a secure hold, Rosa reached desperately for new purchase on the cliff face but found nothing. Perhaps from panic, she shifted, and the movement made her slip. She scrambled for new handholds but fell anyway, her chin smacking hard against a jagged piece of rock as she fell.
Standing right below her, it was easy for Kain to catch her by the waist and guide her to the ground. She fell hard against him, and they stumbled back together. Kain found his feet easily and caught his balance, while Rosa staggered, holding her chin in her hands.
Kain grabbed her shoulders, steadying her uncertain wobble. She straightened, and then Kain saw the blood pooling through her fingers. Never squeamish before, Kain was surprised to find the sight of it made him woozy. "Are... are you all right?" he asked, his voice sounding faint even to his own ears.
"Don't panic. It looks worse than it is," Rosa said, watching Kain carefully. She let go, then reached down to rip a length of cloth from the bottom of her tunic. She rolled it around her fingers into a tight coil, then pressed the wad of fabric under her chin. "The skin is very thin on the skull, so even superficial wounds bleed profusely." She looked up at Kain and saw his still fearful gaze. "I'm okay," she said softly. "I promise. It was more jarring than painful."
Kain nodded, but it did not alleviate the knot of anxiety in his stomach. "Are you going to Cure it?"
Rosa pulled the fabric from her chin, tipped her chin far up, so Kain could see the underside. "Is it bad? If not, I'll just Cure it tonight in the safety ward, so I save my reserves."
It was certainly bloody, the gash in her chin looking red and angry. He stepped toward her, taking the bloody wad of fabric from her with his right hand. With his left, he touched the side of her face, along the jaw. Carefully, he angled her chin upward to get a closer look. Holding her still, he dabbed at the gash with the clean side of the fabric, wiping away the blood.
Rosa was right; with all the blood, it had looked much worse than it was. Now he saw it was only an inch or so wide and not very deep. Around the wound, he saw her skin starting to turn purple in the promise of a bruise.
"How's it look?" Rosa asked, barely moving her mouth as she spoke.
"Bleeding's slowed down," Kain said, relief palpable in his voice. "You're going to get a nasty bruise too, but otherwise it looks fine." He loosened his grip on her jaw, letting her chin lower back down, but kept his fingers on the side of her face. "How's your head feel? You smacked it hard."
Rosa stood very still, then turned her head just slightly toward him, her cheek leaning into his palm. "My head is fine," she said, peering up at him, trying to puzzle out his expression by his exposed mouth and jaw alone. "Do not worry so," she finally said.
Your mouth gives you away, Cecil taunted from his memories.
Kain pulled his hand away, suddenly self-conscious. "If you're feeling able to, we should push on to the next chest," he said, as he abruptly turned away from her, on the pretense of looking out across the new elevation. He became aware of his heart beating hard against his ribcage and slowly breathed to calm it down.
Rosa didn't respond for a long moment, letting the tension thicken in the eerie silence of the mountain. "Down this way," she finally said, sounding small. "There's another set of stairs that we can take down to the next elevation. Then we follow the cliff west until we find the chest."
Kain wanted to say something to alleviate the hurt he heard in her voice, but found he had no explanation even for himself. Instead, he pulled his lance free from its sheath on his back, ready to continue.
Descending to the next elevation down was easier thanks to a set of man-made stairs. They encountered only a few zombies as they followed the cliff west, dispatching them easily. Kain found Rosa easy to work with in battle; they communicated well with only wordless expressions and vague gestures. Kain gradually realized it was the adult version of their playacting battle as children, working in tandem to surprise Cecil with an attack.
Why had he ever tried to keep her away? Kain wondered more than once.
The chest was on a raised rock platform, with another set of stairs carved into the rock. It looked like an offering to the pious who had come this far for their faith.
"Please," Rosa whispered as she opened the lid. "Oh, thank goodness," she sighed in relief, as she pulled out the items: a bedroll, three meal rations, flint and tinder, a small metal pot, and a rod topped with a blue crystal. "An emergency kit for someone stranded away the group. Enough to stay put in the safety ward until rescue comes," she offered as an explanation.
"What's the rod for?" Kain asked.
"An Ice Rod," Rosa answered, picking up the weapon with a certain amount of awe.
"Why not Fire?" Kain asked, confused by her reaction. "Wouldn't that be more effective against the undead?"
"It's not meant to be used in combat," Rosa said as she started putting the new items into her bag. "You use the rod to cast Blizzard and collect the snow and ice, then melt it in the pot over the fire. An endless supply of fresh water." Rosa stood up; she was grinning. "It also means we can take down the fire barrier and get off the mountain." Her expression became suddenly serious as she looked at Kain. "We might be able to do this."
"I don't know why you ever doubted yourself," Kain said. "If I must be stranded on a mountain crawling with the dead, I'm glad it's with you. I don't think there's anyone else more capable."
"Do you mean that?" Rosa asked. "Even Cecil?" she added, and Kain recognized the jealousy in the question. Did Rosa struggle with her own jealous impulses, as he did, and how long had she felt this way, Kain wondered.
"Even Cecil," Kain admitted quietly.
"Let's get going," Rosa said abruptly, turning away from Kain and the chest, but not before he saw her smiling to herself.
They backtracked to the first set of stairs and followed it up. Briefly, they discussed whether it was safe to climb back up the cliff, the way they had come, or to follow the worn path used by mages and pilgrims, as it wound around the mountain. Not wanting to risk Rosa on the cliff face again, Kain insisted on the long way. It would take most of their remaining daylight hours, but if they were quick, they might be able to reach the safety ward before dark.
They opted for stealth as much as possible, sneaking by creatures who were generally unaware of their surroundings. Rosa could often misdirect a zombie's attention by firing an arrow off the path, away from where she and Kain stood. By the time the zombie had shambled over to inspect the sound, Kain and Rosa were far away.
Too often, though, there would be too many grouped up, and Rosa would have to use her magic to quickly eliminate them. As the day moved on, Rosa started to slow, taking longer to move on after each spell casting and encounter.
It was a relief, then, to see the summit again, following the trail of now unmoving corpses back to the safety ward. Some of the tension went out of Rosa at seeing the island and its safety ward once again, the worry easing from her creased brow. They crossed the bridge, first Rosa and then Kain, who kept looking back – just in case.
Somehow, nothing happened – no undead emerged from the shadows and no giant bird of prey descended from the skies. Rosa crossed into the safety ward and immediately went to her knees, pulling items out of her bag.
"Stop," Kain said, crouching beside her. He reached for her hands, holding them in his grip. She looked up at him, hollow-eyed and worn, too tired to ask what he wanted. "Sit, rest. I'll set things up." When she opened her mouth to protest, he interrupted her. "You don't have to do everything. Let me help."
Rosa watched, wordlessly, as Kain set up their meager camp. First, he unrolled the bedroll, then gestured to Rosa for her to use it. Moving slowly, she stood, crossed to the bedroll, then eased herself down. "You've got this?" she asked, sounding unsure.
"I can do this," Kain reassured her, summoning Cecil's words again.
Rosa lay down on her side, watching him with heavy eyes as he unpacked the rest of the supplies on the ground. When he turned to offer her the canteen, her eyes had closed. Instead, he said nothing, and turned back to the task.
Using Odin's knife, Kain cut off a few dry branches and strips of bark from the island's only tree. He broke them into pieces, then arranged them around the twist of tinder from the Mysidian kit. He left it all unlit, however, as he went to consider the Ice rod.
"How in the hell..." Kain muttered as he turned the weapon over in his hands, trying to puzzle out how it worked. Magic had always been Rosa's domain, and now to a lesser extent, Cecil's with his dark power. But Kain had only ever relied on the strength of his muscles; magic seemed strange and foreign to him.
He pointed into the open air, then swished the blue tip around, trying to jostle it into use.
Rosa's unexpected laugh broke the quiet.
Kain whirled around to see her watching him, sitting up on the bedroll. "Don't laugh at me. It's my first spell."
"There's a reason why you're not a mage," Rosa said as she sat up, then held out her hand for the Rod. Kain complied, stepping over to her, giving the weapon over. She looked it over briefly, then pointed it at the ground. Kain could have sworn he had been holding it the exact same way but judging by Rosa's smug expression, he guessed he hadn't. With a flourish, Rosa spun the Rod, and ice crystals began forming on the ground where she pointed.
"And a reason why you are," Kain countered he grabbed the small metal pot, and began gathering ice shards, awkward with his gauntlets. "You would have been wasted as an archer."
"No reason why I can't do both," Rosa remarked as she took the pot from him and began gathering the ice herself. "You haven't ever wanted two things at the same time?" she asked, casting a glance sideways at him.
Her question paralyzed him, making his mouth suddenly too dry for words. "Rosa..." he managed but was unsure of what she wanted him to say, as she watched him expectantly. Kain remembered the look on Cecil's face as he confessed his feelings, a mix of joy and hope – was that what love looked like, underneath the helmet of a dark knight?
This is the place to confront uncomfortable truths, Elena reminded him from his faded dream. Are you ready for that?
"Cecil is in love with you," Kain blurted out, before he could stop himself. "And just like the decision between archery and white magic, there's a right choice for you. Be with Cecil. You'll make each other very happy." He knelt beside the unlit fire, busying himself with the flint and tinder to light it.
Rosa said nothing, stunned into silence by his admission. Then, she shook her head, clearing the shock from her face. "Cecil's feelings don't surprise me. I've suspected for a while now. But you..." she frowned thoughtfully. "But you, giving up on your own – that surprises me. You're not known as a quitter, Kain."
"For the sake of our friendship-" Kain started, but Rosa held up a hand to silence him.
"I mean your feelings for Cecil," she spoke over him. "Everything has always been for Cecil. You're always worried about where he is and how he's feeling." She paused, then continued more quietly, her voice barely audible over the howling winds above their heads. "You gave me up for Cecil." It was not an accusation, but a statement of fact.
"I..." Kain wanted to protest but found no lie in her words. The realization subdued him, sapping his desire to argue with her. "I could not bear to choose between you," he finally admitted, his deep voice somehow sounding small. "And in not choosing, a choice was made for me. But it is all right, because Cecil is the better man for you." One of the sparks finally caught, and a tiny flame began to grow. "You might even be a queen," he added quietly.
Rosa looked away, on the pretense of fussing with pot now full of snow. Then, she handed the pot to him. "Once again," she murmured softly without glancing his way. "No one has bothered to ask me what I feel."
Kain watched her, and saw her jaw set to a stubborn angle. "What do you feel?" he asked, then held his breath waiting for her reply.
"I love you both beyond words," Rosa answered with a resigned sigh. "I don't always know what that means."
"I understand," Kain said, exhaling slowly. He put the pot in the small flickering flame; the ice and snow began to shrink in volume as it rapidly heated up and melted. "More than I can say." He looked across the small fire at her to where she still sat on the bedroll. "After nearly losing you, Cecil will be compelled to profess his feelings once he sees us again. You'll have to decide then."
"And no matter what happens, someone's heart will break," Rosa observed sadly.
"What will you tell him?" Kain asked.
Before Rosa could answer, a ghoulish howl interrupted the relative quiet and peace of the safety ward, sounding close by. Both Rosa and Kain looked up to see a zombie struggling across the bridge, the wooden boards swinging with each uncertain step forward.
Rosa stood, grabbing her bow and quiver from the ground. She nocked an arrow, took aim, and fired. The arrow shot through the blue aura of the safety ward, striking the zombie in the eye. It roared and threw itself backwards, and the momentum sent it over the bridge's railing, falling to the jagged rocks below.
"We're not off the mountain yet," Rosa said somberly as she lowered her bow. She cast a sideways glance at Kain. "For now, there is no Cecil, no Baron, no meddling mothers or kings. There's only you and me trying to survive. Can you be present with me until then?"
Kain met her gaze, trying to keep his mouth in a neutral line. "I can," he said.
As the sun continued to move across the sky, getting closer to the western horizon, Kain and Rosa worked in relative quiet. Rosa used the now heated water to clean the wound on her chin, then cast Cure on herself, while Kain took off his armor and set it neatly in a row next to the supplies.
Rosa tore off several long strips of cloth from her white mage robes, saving a few with the supplies to use as bandages, then handed one to Kain and told him to wash his face. Using the Ice Rod to generate more ice, she put more water to heat.
They used the second and third batch of hot water to wipe their faces and hands clean, which turned out to be desperately needed after a night and day on the mountain, evidenced by how dirty the cloth became when Kain was done.
The fourth pot of water was left to cool in a pile of ice, while Kain passed out two of the meal rations. Sitting together, facing the western sky, they ate their meager meals and passed tepid water back and forth. The sight of the terrible mountain was behind them, and it was easy to pretend it wasn't there as they watched the setting sun together.
Rosa leaned her head on Kain's shoulder, as they used to do while sitting on Cecil's roof together. Kain wound his arm around her, and she scooted in closer. He tried to think of something to say, something that would alleviate the aching absence of Cecil from his other side but found no adequate words.
Rosa's lean became heavier and Kain felt her breathing steady as she fell asleep against him. He didn't dare move, for fear of accidentally disturbing her. She pushed herself too far, using too much energy to get them through Mount Ordeals. How would tomorrow go, he wondered, once they tried the full journey down? Could Rosa rest enough to recover her magic?
Be present with me, Rosa reminded him.
Kain pushed aside the worries of tomorrow, the uncertainty of whether they could safely descend the mountain, and whether Cecil would be safe and waiting for them. He closed his eyes, and tried only being aware of what was around him: the whistling wind and Rosa's familiar warmth by his side.
Finally finding some measure of peace, Kain fell asleep.
Kain dreamed.
Rosa sat on a stool beside a window, the curtains pulled back. In her lap was a wooden hoop, stretched tight with fabric, with bits of thread laced haphazardly through it. Rosa looked out the window, her eyes distant, looking bored.
"You won't improve your stitches if you don't practice," Joanna warned from the side.
Rosa kicked her legs, dangling from the stool, and the gesture made the dream snap into focus, Rosa's features suddenly softening. She was a child, no more than five or six, and now she pouted. "When will Papa get here?"
"When he gets here," Joanna answered. She sat in a chair beside the hearth, her own wooden hoop also in her lap. "Sulking and staring at the window will not make time go faster." She paused, sticking her needle into the fabric, and looked up. "Keeping yourself busy will. Needlework is a good skill to learn."
"Needlework is stupid," Rosa huffed, looking out the window again.
Joanna didn't look angered by her daughter's defiance, only amused, smiling to herself. "It's not so stupid, when you find yourself stitching up a soldier in the middle of the field."
Rosa's eyes went wide. "Really? Why wouldn't you just use magic?"
"Magic doesn't always work," Joanna answered, shifting in her seat to face Rosa more fully. "Or can make things worse if you don't know the scope of the wound or illness you're treating. Sometimes you just need to let the body heal itself or find other treatments outside of magic."
Before Rosa could ask her next question, the front door suddenly opened, and Roland stepped inside. The years had made Roland a blurry image in Kain's mind, but now, Kain saw Roland with clarity – a tall, lanky man, his blonde hair tied back in queue at his neck. When he smiled it reached his eyes, making them look a brighter blue.
"I'm home!" Roland declared.
"Papa!" Rosa squealed with childish delight and jumped from her stool, her needlework forgotten and falling to the floor. She ran to the door, and Roland knelt and met her with open arms. They embraced, and Roland stood, holding Rosa securely as he lifted her into the air. She circled her arms around his neck, holding on tightly but never fearing that he might drop her.
"Princess," Roland greeted her with a kiss on her brow. "I've missed you."
"I'm not a princess," Rosa sulked, her expression souring with displeasure. "I'm a knight."
"A princess-knight," Roland corrected himself with a grin. "I have a gift for you."
"What did you bring me?" Rosa asked, eyes full of curiosity.
Roland set Rosa back down, and she watched him eagerly as he set his bag on the ground. He knelt beside it and began digging through its contents. Finally, he pulled out a book. "It's a guide on desert survival," he said as he handed the book to Rosa. "For your expanding travels."
"Wow," Rosa said with awe as she opened the book to a map of Damcyan and its territories. She traced her finger down a line that traveled through the map, never in a straight line, but meandering around the many blue dots on the map. "Why aren't the roads straight?" she asked, peering up at her father.
"Great question," Roland said, as he touched a blue dot on the map, drawing Rosa's attention back to it. "These are water sources in the desert. The roads follow these paths to ensure each traveler is never far from water. But," he said, tapping the page for emphasis, "Wind storms are common in the desert, making it easy to stray off the road."
"What do you do if you get lost?" Rosa asked, her eyes wide.
Roland turned the page to a new illustration. To Rosa, it looked like a cross between a man and a fish, standing tall on two legs, covered in red scales and fins, large gills protruding from its neck. "This is a Desert Sahagin. They're nasty creatures who are very territorial, but spotting one is a good sign because they always den near water."
"So, if you get lost," Rosa said as she looked over the picture, taking in its details. "You find these monsters or their tracks and follow them back to water."
"Exactly," Roland said. "Staying cool and hydrated is important, especially if you want to prevent Sand Fever."
"Sand Fever?" Rosa asked, looking back up at Roland.
But it was Joanna who answered. "A terrible and strange illness, contracted by breathing the desert air. The body's immune system can usually handle it, but if it's weakened by dehydration or something else…" Joanna trailed off.
Rosa took the prompt eagerly. "Then Sand Fever is easy to catch!"
"Exactly," Joanna said with a proud smile. "And in serious cases, it cannot be healed or eased by magic or usual medicines for fever, but by the egg of a rare creature that nests in Damcyan's northern caves."
"Really?" Rosa asked as she opened the book again and started flipping through its pages.
"Why don't you read more in your room?" Roland suggested casually, his tone mild.
Rosa, with her nose already in the book, exited the dream.
With a sudden grin full of mischief, Roland grabbed for Joanna, taking her wrist in his hand, and pulling her toward him. "Come here, wife," he said as he circled his arms around her in an embrace. "I missed you."
"I missed you too," Joanna replied with a laugh, as she settled in against his chest. "How long do I have you? When is your next deployment?"
"Only a few weeks," Roland replied with a frown.
"Why so soon?" Joanna asked, sounding disappointed.
"There's been sightings of strange monsters around the Tower of Babil," Roland said. "I'll be accompanying the Red Wings to investigate." He spotted the concern on Joanna's face and shook his head. "Do not fret. Richard is coming with me, like the old days."
"Richard?" Joanna asked, surprised. She leaned back to look at Roland, loosening their embrace. "Why? Commanders don't take on missions like these."
Roland shrugged, unsure. "I don't know. This either comes from King Odin or Richard himself; I was only told he would be on the ship." He saw Joanna frowning and mirrored the expression. "What's wrong?" he asked, suddenly concerned.
Joanna stiffened, seeming suddenly uncomfortable. "I…" she started to say, then stopped, closing her mouth. She studied Roland for a long, intense moment, as if trying to decide something, then shook her head. "It is nothing – only too many feelings at once. I'm both overjoyed to see you and heartbroken you must leave again so soon."
"Then let me overwhelm you with only joy, so you forget all else," Roland said, taking her by the hand, leading her away. "Only let me say hello properly," he added with his usual grin.
Joanna smiled, though it did not reach her eyes; Roland pretended not to notice.
When Kain woke abruptly, hours later, he was confused and disoriented by the darkness around them. It took his eyes a moment to adjust, but the glow from the safety ward and the moons overhead granted just enough light for Kain to see.
Rosa was still sitting beside him, but she huddled in on herself, breathing heavily. Kain realized this was what had woken him, his side feeling strangely cold without her.
"Rosa?" he asked cautiously.
"Sorry, I just..." Rosa abruptly wiped her face, and Kain knew she had been crying. "I had the strangest dream..."
"What happened?"
Rosa drew in a breath to steady herself, and seemed more in control as time softened the edges of her dream. "I dreamed of my father, but it seemed so real. I thought it was a memory, but…" she hesitated, grappling for the right words. "Only this went on even after I left the room. I saw my parents talking about the mission he was killed on."
"I dreamed of my mother," Kain said with a confessional air. It seemed easier to admit to that than to tell Rosa he had witnessed her memory-dream too, like he had intruded on some private moment. "It felt like a memory, too, only it wasn't my own. She told me that the truth was right in front of me if I wanted to see it. I think..." he hesitated, unsure of whether to continue, but the vulnerability felt right in this moment with her. "I think she was angry with your mother about something." He shook his head. "I don't remember. Is Mount Ordeals creating such strange dreams?"
"It could be," Rosa replied. "Mount Ordeals has a relationship with the dead that few understand. It would not surprise me if they tried to communicate through our dreams."
"Do you think I'll dream of my father?" Kain asked, with hunger in his voice that surprised him. What wisdom could Richard still impart to his son, now grown into a man? What would Kain give for just one more conversation with his father?
Rosa smiled; he could only see it faintly in the dark, but saw her cheeks curve up with the expression. "Perhaps." She found his hand and laced her fingers through his. "Will there ever be a day when you don't let others dictate your choices? Not your father, not the king, not my mother, not even Cecil."
"And not you?" Kain asked.
"When have you ever listened to what I want?" Rosa countered with a sharp edge to her tone. "You have always worked to circumvent me from my goals. Always with good intentions, certainly, but you do it nevertheless."
"What do you want, Rosa?" Kain asked, then, knowing what this was about, added, "Who?" He became acutely aware of how close and warm she was. "Suppose we're standing at the entrance of Mount Ordeals and the choice is only yours. Not Cecil's or mine, but yours. Who do you pick?"
Kain felt Rosa stiffen in response, her shoulders and back going rigid with tension. "Are you actually asking me that?" she asked, full of trepidation. "Are we finally having this conversation?"
"Yes," Kain answered, feeling emboldened by the nighttime darkness and the insulating danger of the mountain.
"Kain," Rosa said, shifting where she sat to look at him, pulling her hands away from his. He saw her faintly outlined in the safety ward's glow, the moonshine throwing silvery glints through her hair, eyes too dark to make out their color. "Cecil is..." she paused, looking aside from Kain, up at the twin moons in the sky. "I'm lost in the desert and dying of thirst. Cecil is a cask of water. But you... you are the whole river, flooding me, dragging me under the current. The way I feel about you terrifies me, because I never know if you're going to drown me. You..." she looked back to Kain, then down at her lap, and blurted out the next words, "You make my heart sick with want."
Kain had no words, his tongue tacky in his suddenly dry mouth.
"If it were just the two of us..." Rosa continued, unwilling to let her last words hang too long between them. "...it would be an easy decision for you, wouldn't it?" she asked, her voice going high with emotion. "Why can't it be that way? Just you and me, and no one else, together on this mountain. Can we not have one night of that and not let Cecil or anyone else stand between us?"
"Would you want that?" Kain asked, glad now of the darkness that hid his face from her, feeling his cheeks go warm. "If I could offer only right now, would that be enough? If I could do no more?"
"I would," Rosa whispered in the dark. "Would you?"
Something on the other side of the bridge howled, splitting the eerie silence of the mountain with its wretched wail. Kain looked over at the entrance of the safety ward, listening for any creaking from the bridge. When nothing new sounded, he looked back to Rosa, mouth open to answer her, though unsure of what he was going to say.
Instead, in an echo of their first encounter a lifetime ago in the Dragoon's armory, she kissed him.
There was a new greedy hunger replacing the shy uncertainty that had driven Rosa when they were younger. She circled a possessive hand around his neck, pulling him toward her, demanding closeness. She kissed him like a drowning woman, Kain realized, like she could only get air in her lungs through his mouth.
If Kain had any lingering doubts or conflicting feelings, they were overwhelmed by Rosa and the intensity of her desire. The abrupt realization that she wanted him this much sent an involuntary shiver through him; Rosa pulled him closer in response, as if she thought he was cold, clinging to him like she alone could protect him from the threats that surrounded them.
Kain did not think of Cecil or the complicated feelings Kain had about him. Rosa and her immediacy overwhelmed him, drowning out all coherent thoughts.
What happened next was an ongoing continuation of that kiss, unfolding gradually between them. At one point, Rosa became suddenly shy, and pulled away from him. Kain was about to ask her if she was all right, if she wanted to stop, but Rosa took his hand in hers and led him, standing from where they sat, over to the middle of safety ward, beside the bedroll.
Suddenly afraid either of them would change their minds, he pulled her against him, one arm wound around her back, pressing their bodies tightly together. Rosa briefly went wide-eyed, looking up in surprise at him. Kain offered her a sheepish grin, and Rosa laughed, alleviating the uncertainty of the moment. It was suddenly one of their childhood games, lighthearted and fun, without the looming pressure and expectations of adulthood, without the danger of either Mount Ordeals or what waited for them in Baron.
Kain kissed her, wanting to be the one to initiate this time, wanting to show her he was present and here with her, that no one else stood on the mountain with them. What started as a few soft touches between them gradually became more insistent, until they were both tugging impatiently at each other's clothing. Kain caught only glimpses of Rosa bare in the moonlight, but what he did see stole his breath away. She broke away and dragged Kain down to the bedroll on the ground.
Later, when Kain reflected on what happened next, he would remember it as the most perfect night of his life. Rosa had a quiet confidence as she touched him, by then betrayed her own inexperience when his reaction caused her to gasp. He saw the depth of love in her eyes as she pulled him down to her, whispering encouragement into his ear. Even his awkward fumbling seemed perfectly suited to the moment, somehow more endearing as Rosa helped him, guiding his movement.
Together, finally, Kain buried his face in Rosa's hair, overwhelmed by her presence around him. She clung to him, arms and legs holding him tightly. Kain knew the mechanics of sex – anyone who had ever spent any time around a chocobo farm or listened to a traveling bard's bawdy ballads figured that out quickly – but this seemed so much more than that, something too sacred to trust to words.
Too quickly, it was over, as first encounters often are. Rosa gasped confessions of love, holding him possessively to her, her hands tangled and pulling in his long hair. It was all suddenly too much and Kain cried out, abruptly spending himself and collapsing on top of her.
Still except for their heavy breathing, Rosa's grip on his hair turned gentle, now lightly stroking his head. Resting his brow on her chest, he had so many things he wanted to tell her: how much he loved her, how much he needed her, how much more important than she was than anyone else...
"Rosa, I..." Kain started.
"Shh," Rosa softly interrupted him. "Say nothing more and let this night be what it is." She continued stroking his hair, lulling him toward sleep. "Rest for now, and we'll face tomorrow together."
"Together," Kain murmured in agreement, his eyes already growing heavy. Given all that happened that day and night, it did not take long for sleep to claim him.