Chapter 8: We'll Meet and I Will Beat You (Our Schedules Permitting)

"Speech"
'Thoughts'
"Zanpakutō"
"Hollows/Vizard"
"{Speaking a different language}"

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"Sure, there's whatever just crashed through the barrier, but that's the most interesting thing that's happened all month. When are we going to get a real fight again?" One Shinigami was complaining to his partner. Tall and bald, Madarame Ikkaku ironically stood out among higher ranked Shinigami because he wore a completely standard uniform (minus his lack of socks). All that truly stood out about his appearance, besides his lack of hair, were small red markings at the outer corners of his eyes. The man in question casually laid atop one of the many walls in Seireitei, his relaxed demeanor belying a strength and skill that equaled most lieutenants, and surpassed some.

His companion was in many ways his polar opposite visually. His uniform was customized with a large orange cloth that covered his neck and much of his upper chest. He had colorful feathers decorating his right eyelashes and eyebrow. Unlike his comrade, he had a full head of blatantly well cared for black hair and shiny skin. In contrast to Ikkaku's moderately thuggish look, Ayasegawa Yumichika was a total pretty boy. Yumichika sat atop the same wall as his oldest friend and shrugged in response. "All excursions to Hueco Mundo are on hold until after the execution. It's not like a fight is going to just drop out of the sky."

Proving that fate had a sense of humor, immediately after he said that a pair of young women fell out of the sky, their descent stopped by a large orange shield appearing beneath them just before impact. While neither man knew who they were, the duo were definitely intruders given their clothing. Ikkaku sat up abruptly and called out, "It's not like a barrel of high-quality sake is going to just drop out of the sky!" As he stared into the sky hopefully, the two women got to their feet. One had short black hair and was wearing white clothing while the other had long orange hair and had the largest bust either Shinigami had ever seen, excluding Rangiku of course.

When his barrel of sake failed to materialize, Ikkaku shrugged, "Can't have everything I suppose. Still!" He hopped to his feet, "At least I'm getting a fight!" Gazing down at the two women who were now eyeing him and Yumichika warily, Ikkaku asked, "So what're your names strangers?"

Moving to stand defensively in front of Orihime, Tatsuki replied, "Arisawa Tatsuki. What's it to you?" Even as she spoke, the tomboy activated her Ryū no Senshi. Though the violet scales spread across her arms and legs, she carefully kept them from spreading to her hands and feet, not wanting to give away what she was doing. Similarly, Tatsuki kept her power out of her head so her horns wouldn't sprout.

Ikkaku smiled in response, "It's only right to know the name of your killer. Name's Madarame Ikkaku, 3rd Seat of 11th Division. Nice to meet you!" His final sentence was shouted as the bald Shinigami jumped down from his perch. Unsheathing his Zanpakutō, he swung it down at Tatsuki with his left hand even as he landed. Though Orihime jumped backwards, her karate lessons with Tatsuki kicking in, her girlfriend stood her ground. Catching her opponent's attack on her armored forearms, she completed her transformation. Tatsuki's hands and feet enlarged slightly even as powerful claws and talons sprung from them, incidentally shredding her shoes. As amber bled into her brown eyes, two pairs of horns grew from her forehead, one longer set growing above the other. With a heave, she forced Ikkaku's Zanpakutō upwards and quickly shifted her weight to kick at his midsection with a taloned foot. Blocking with his sheathe, the man's smile never left his face. "That's an interesting power you've got there. Let's have a good time, shall we?"

Off to the side, Orihime's hands went to her hairpins as she prepared to use her Shun Shun Rikka. Before she could, a hand clapped down onto her shoulder. With a start, she turned and saw the other Shinigami standing right next to her. "None of that now. A fight like this is meant to be one on one. If you get involved, I'll have to get involved as well." Looking closely at her, he added, "And I really don't want to fight such a beautiful creature."

Orihime squeaked and jumped back slightly. "I'm taken," She stammered.

"And I'm not interested," Was the reply. "Now, why don't we let them enjoy their fight? We can decide what to do afterwards." So saying, he turned his attention back to the dueling pair. Though weaker than his companion, Orihime could sense both were considerably stronger than her. Meaning that if she joined the fight, she'd need Tatsuki to protect her from both. Realizing she had no reasonable alternative, Orihime instead shuffled a little further away from the flamboyant Shinigami and resolved to watch from the sidelines. Still, if she felt Tatsuki needed her, she'd jump in regardless of what that man thought.

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In other parts of the Seireitei, the rest of the Ryoka had to figure out their own landing strategies. Yoruichi merely reinforced her limbs with Reiryoku and instantly vanished in a burst of Shunpo, leaving behind a confused patrol of unseated Shinigami. Some distance away, Uryū utilized Hirenkyaku to slow his fall as he landed in a seemingly deserted area. In contrast, Sado and Ganju used the latter's Seppa to cushion their fall but landed among a group of unseated Shinigami. Said Shinigami quickly fell to their unyielding fists. Bambietta and Candice used Hirenkyaku much like Uryū, though they had to snipe some Shinigami near their landing zone before they could touch down. As they landed, Bambietta shouldered her rifle and smirked at her comrade, "I shot more than you."

Dismissing her bow, Candice retorted, "And half of those shots didn't do fuck all. One shot, one kill." While it was true that Bambietta had always managed to put more shots downrange than she could, it was equally true that the brunette was more liable to follow "spray and pray" rather than properly aiming. Even when using their Schrifts, Candice preferred to snipe an enemy with a perfect headshot, unlike her friend's "tried and true" saturation bombing.

"Hey, a man that's getting shot at is a man who isn't returning fire," Bambietta scoffed. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught a bit of movement. One of the Shinigami wasn't incapacitated yet and was reaching for his Zanpakutō. Casually, she shot him through the hand, stating, "None of that now. Just lay there like a good boy. Once we're gone, then you can do whatever you want."

And so the duo departed, still debating the merits of accuracy versus rate of fire.

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As Ichigo fell through the air, he found himself wishing he had some kind of wind based Zanpakutō or at least one that allowed him to fly. A pulse of outrage from within caused him to pat Eien-ō lovingly, 'Just kidding, girl. I wouldn't trade you for the world.' Eien-ō gave off a thrum of satisfaction at that. Of course, mollifying his sword didn't change the fact he had just reached terminal velocity. Casting his gaze around, Ichigo noticed he was going to land close to the divide between two levels. Seeing the massive wall gave him an idea that was either brilliant or insane, depending on whether it worked. Pointing towards a section of the wall some ways away, Ichigo declared, "Bakudō #4, Hainawa!"

A golden rope flew from his hand and latched on to one of the wall's outcroppings. Pulling it taut, Ichigo felt his vertical velocity transition into horizontal as he swung in an arc. Just as his swing reached its apex, he released his Bakudō, allowing him to land on the top of the wall. After patting himself down, Ichigo couldn't help but laugh, "Holy shit, I can't believe that worked! Eat your heart out, Spider-man!"

Unfortunately, his celebration was cut short when a female voice called out, "Who are you?! What division are you with?!" Freezing in surprise, Ichigo slowly turned around towards the source of said voice. Before him stood a short young woman with shoulder length black hair, a strand of which hung between her purple eyes. Said eyes were currently narrowed in suspicion as her hand rested on her Zanpakutō. At least, until they widened in shock, "L-l-lieutenant Kaien?"

Since he didn't recognize her from the briefing, Ichigo figured she probably wasn't anyone worth worrying about. Still, no point in getting into a fight yet if he could avoid it. He was tempted to go with her bit of mistaken identity but doubted he'd be able to keep up the charade. Whoever this Kaien was, she was clearly close to him and would recognize any slips. Attempting to adopt a more casual stance, Ichigo answered, "Sorry, you've got the wrong guy. I'm the 8th Seat of 13th Division, name's-"

But before he could finish his fake introduction, the Shinigami woman cut him off, "Fool! Do you think I wouldn't recognize my own superior?!" Inwardly, Ichigo cursed, 'Thirteen options and I happen to choose the division she's in. Fuck me.' "As you are clearly an intruder, I, Kuchiki Rukia, 11th Seat of 13th Division am placing you under arrest!" Rukia drew her sword and took up a ready stance, "Surrender peacefully and your life will be spared."

Ichigo sighed in irritation; not even two minutes into the infiltration and he's already fighting. Drawing Eien-ō, he counter-offered, "Look, I'm not really here to waste time fighting unnecessary battles. How about you get out of my way and I don't tan your hide?" While Ichigo had so far met a grand total of five Shinigami, this Rukia girl didn't seem particularly impressive. She felt stronger than that Jidanbō guy Sado fought but going by Nemu's comments about lieutenants (and captains) having eighty percent of their power sealed in the Living World, this midget wasn't even half as strong as a lieutenant.

Said midget sputtered in shock, "T-tan my hide?! What kind of uncouth lout are you?"

Her answer came in the form of a horizontal slash aimed at her head. Though she quickly blocked, the sheer difference in their physical strength caused her to be bowled over. Ichigo attempted to stomp on her downed form, only for a silently cast Byakurai to slam into his face and send him reeling. While Rukia quickly got back to her feet, a blind slash from her opponent left a nasty slice across her thigh. Ichigo's eyesight returned just in time to dodge a second Byakurai, blood streaming from his nose. "Damnit! If that's the way you want it, Bakudō #62, Hyapporankan!" Throwing the glowing blue rod in his hand and letting it multiply into dozens more, Ichigo rushed after his attack, seeking to end the fight the moment his enemy was pinned.

Rukia found herself having trouble standing on her injured leg, let alone dodging such a wide area attack. In desperation she put her hands together and made a pushing motion as she shouted, "Hadō #73, Sōren Sōkatsui!" From her palms came two blasts of blue Reiryoku one after the other. The first one broke apart the rods aiming for her while the second slammed right into the Ryoka. Panting slightly from casting such a high level Kidō without incantation, Rukia said, "Ha, clearly I'll have to take you seriously, Ryoka. So be it." Holding her Zanpakutō before her, she spun it in a circle and intoned, "Dance, Sode no Shirayuki." As the katana spun, the entire sword turned white as snow and a long white ribbon grew from the pommel.

Tearing away the torn and burnt remains of his upper robe, Ichigo raised his Zanpakutō above his head and declared, "Reclaim your throne, Eien-ō!" Once his shikai was released, Ichigo took up a ready stance once more. His bloody visage glowered at the diminutive Shinigami, "Round two then."

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Tatsuki and her bald opponent clashed once more. As they fought, she noticed a pattern in Ikkaku's fighting style: he defended with the sheath in his right hand and attacked with the sword in his left. When he leapt towards her for another attack from his left, she got ready to dodge and counterattack. But as the tomboy ducked under his slash, she realized Ikkaku had just swung his sheath at her. Her mistake cost her as a downward slash carved into her face, just barely missing her left eye. "Fuck!" Tatsuki cursed aloud, swiping blindly as she reflexively closed her eyes.

Ikkaku hopped backwards a short distance while she rubbed the blood from her eye. "C'mon. Surely you can do better? We've barely even started having fun."

Baring her fanged teeth, Tatsuki snarled, "Fun? I'll show you fun!" Focusing her power towards her limbs, bits of golden electricity started arcing between her fingers as well as her toes. Tatsuki lunged forward, crossing the distance between them in an instant. Ikkaku's eyes widened in surprise, but he nonetheless brought his sheath up to block. Tatsuki's claws sliced right through his sheath without pausing before leaving five vertical lacerations from the Shinigami's left shoulder almost to his hip. Rather than immediately retreat, Ikkaku punched her in the cheek.

Laughing as both recovered, the Third Seat loudly declared, "That's more like it! Come at me with your full power so I can extend the same courtesy!" He slammed his Zanpakutō's pommel into its ruined sheathe and cried, "Grow, Hōzukimaru!" A brief whirlwind engulfed the man's weapon, only to disperse and reveal that his katana had transformed into a naginata with a crimson horsehair tassel.

Off to the side, Yumichika commented, "Your friend is doing exceptionally well." His remark caused Orihime to turn towards him in surprise, not expecting him to compliment Tatsuki. "Ikkaku is the third strongest fighter in the division with the heaviest combat focus. Even if she loses, she should be proud of making him use shikai."

Orihime frowned at that. 'Tatsuki-chan won't lose!'

Dodging her opponent's probing thrusts, Tatsuki remarked, "You've got better reach, but you'd have been better off sticking with your katana. I never cared for em, but my dojo saw plenty of staff fighting. One of the most common mistakes I saw," As Ikkaku swung his naginata towards her, the draconic teen blocked and rushed forwards to counterattack, "Was overreliance on your greater reach." With that, Tatsuki drove her hand forward like a spear towards the bald Shinigami's already injured shoulder.

Even as her claws pierced straight through his shoulder, Ikkaku smirked. "Split apart!" Suddenly, Hōzukimaru split into a three-section staff. The two sections Ikkaku wasn't holding continued their previous momentum, causing the blade to swing right for her face. Unable to pull her hand free in time, Tatsuki's scream rent the air as her right eye was sliced open!

"TATSUKI-CHAN!" Orihime yelled. She quickly rushed forward, only to immediately have to dodge as Yumichika slashed towards her. The buxom orangette tried to move around him but his Zanpakutō lashed out towards her once more. "Santen Kesshun, I reject!" An orange barrier stopped his attack cold and Orihime snarled furiously, "Get out of my way!"

His ever-present smirk still in place, Yumichika responded, "I'm afraid not. I told you, all duels are one on one." Despite refusing to stand aside, he made no further aggressive actions towards her. "Simply keep watching until the fight's over and we'll have no problems."

But Orihime wasn't having it. She refused to back down when someone she loved needed her. Instead she snapped, "Koten Zanshun! I reject!" Tsubaki flew from her hairpin with greater speed than ever before, fueled by her rage. The fairy obliterated Yumichika's Zanpakutō and mangled his hand before returning to her. While Yumichika felt a howl of pain and outrage from Ruri'iro Kujaku, but didn't focus on it, his attention dominated by the snarling woman before him. "Move or die!"

During this time, Tatsuki and Ikkaku hadn't been idle. Indeed, despite the loss of her eye and the blood pouring down her face, Tatsuki was still going strong. Ikkaku, who'd only seen such tenacity in himself and his captain, was surprised when she lashed out with a vicious kick that embedded her talons into his lower thigh. The bald man's injury was worsened when the martial artist then dragged her foot downward, shredding his leg. Still, she wasn't the only tenacious fighter. Ikkaku smashed his forehead into her nose, breaking it, before reconnecting Hōzukimaru and smashing the tasseled end right into her bleeding eye socket. Once more, Tatsuki howled, "Motherfucker!" Grasping her ruined eye with one hand, she made a blind swipe with the other, causing her enemy to jump back.

Though she still had power to spare, the blood loss was getting to Tatsuki. Already her vision was swimming, and it was a chore just to stay standing. If she didn't finish the fight soon, she'd be a goner. As such, she started focusing her Reiryoku into her chest, preparing for her strongest attack. Though it might have won the fight sooner, she still needed a few seconds to charge it, something her opponent hadn't been willing to give her. Nor was he keen to start now. Seeing his enemy up to something, Ikkaku decided it was time for one final clash to decide their battle. One last exchange, winner takes all. Readying Hōzukimaru, he abandoned all defense in exchange for landing a finishing blow.

To the bald Shinigami's surprise, she didn't even attempt to dodge his attack, his Zanpakutō impaling her through her liver with ease. Looking down at his Zanpakutō in surprise at how easily the fight ended, Ikkaku said, "Huh. That was anticli-" He cut himself off when Tatsuki's hands grabbed hold of Hōzukimaru's shaft. Turning his gaze back towards her, he saw a golden light in her throat, shining so brilliantly, he could see it through her skin. As the light traveled up Tatsuki's throat towards her mouth, Ikkaku had a moment to realize what was about to happen. "Well that's not good." With a cry that sounded more demonic than human, Tatsuki launched a golden beam of electricity out of her throat and straight into his head and upper chest. The blast tore right into Ikkaku, launching him dozens of meters even as it burnt into his flesh. He struck the ground and tumbled for a few more meters before coming to a stop. He didn't get back up.

Tatsuki opened her mouth, presumably to make some post-battle taunt, only to collapse from her injuries. Orihime and Yumichika promptly broke away from their standoff, rushing to the aid of their respective friends. Orihime quickly engulfed her girlfriend in her Sōten Kisshun. To her relief, she could feel Tatsuki's wounds healing, even her slashed and crushed eye. Meanwhile, Yumichika used what Kaidō he knew to stabilize his best friend. Once Yumichika felt he could move him, he slung Ikkaku's arm over his shoulder and turned towards the two Ryoka. "I don't know why you're here, Ryoka. But I speak for both Ikkaku and myself when I say I hope we fight again." With that, he vanished in a burst of Shunpo, eager to get his partner to a proper healer.

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Ichigo refused to let his opponent gain traction and charged forth. Eien-ō was brought in for a thrust at Rukia's chest. Though she blocked his attack and forced a blade-lock, Ichigo wasn't done. "Yūrei no ken," He intoned. Before Rukia could ponder what he was doing, a flash of movement in the corner of her eye caught her attention. Quickly dodging backwards, she barely avoided decapitation as a sword passed through the space her head had just occupied. Immediately afterwards, she had to twist to avoid another sword.

Though her opponent refused to relent, the Kuchiki did get enough space to see what he'd done. Attacking alongside the Ryoka was a pair of duplicates of his shikai, each moving independently of the original. She focused on dodging, trying to spot a hole in his defenses. As such, she caught when he passed straight through one of the duplicates. 'They're illusions!' Certain she'd puzzled out the secret, on the next exchange, Rukia parried his Zanpakutō up and away from her, ignoring the phantom blades.

However, as she tried to fire a Byakurai into her opponent's chest, one of the "illusions" pierced through the foot of her uninjured leg, nailing her to the ground. The young Shinigami gave a cry of pain and alarm, which was cut off when the Ryoka struck her in the chest with Eien-ō's pommel. Her impaled foot was ripped free as she went tumbling backwards. Her enemy must have thought her finished as he didn't press the attack, merely watched her warily. Shakily, Rukia forced herself into a kneeling position, Sode no Shirayuki seemingly being used as a crutch. Using what was left of her Reiryoku, Rukia punctured the ground as she prepared one last attack, "Tsugi no Mai, Ha-"

"Don't think so! Bakudō #9, Hōrin!" Before Rukia could finish her attack, her arms were pinned to her sides by an orange and yellow rope. With a swing of his arm, Ichigo lifted her high in the air then slammed her back down to the ground. The wall they were fighting on cracked, as did several of her bones. Though the Kidō didn't dissipate, neither was she flung into the air again. The Ryoka approached and calmly placed his Zanpakutō only a few inches from her throat. To her surprise, rather than finish her off, he instead demanded, "Yield." In no shape to continue, Rukia shakily nodded. Still, the orange haired man didn't remove his blade. "Now, I only have one question I want answered. Where is Kurotsuchi Nemu?"

The diminutive Shinigami's eyes widened in shock. 'That's what he's after?! He invaded the Seireitei for a single criminal?!' Coughing, which sent further jolts of agony through her body, Rukia roughly answered, "White… tower… middle of… Seirei…tei."

Finally removing his sword from her throat, the man who so looked like Shiba Kaien resealed and sheathed his Zanpakutō. With a firm nod, he said, "Much obliged. Now, I better be going."

As he turned to leave, Rukia couldn't help but call to him, raising her voice as much as she was able, "You… won't defeat my… brother."

In response, the Ryoka laughed. "So what? I'm not here for him. I'm here for Nemu. If you lot let her go, I'll take her and leave. If not, I'll kill whoever I have to. Be sure to pass that on for me when you wake up, would you?" The last thing she saw before darkness claimed her was his sandaled foot rapidly approaching her head.

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As Sado and Ganju mopped up yet another patrol, the giant took a moment to comment on something that had been bothering him, especially as he was fairly certain he could beat these Shinigami even without his powers. "You seem to hate Shinigami a lot. Why is that?" A random Shinigami tried to take advantage of his apparent inattention, but his Zanpakutō stopped cold on Sado's arm. Said Shinigami grinned sheepishly, only to catch the teen's left fist to the face.

From where he currently had one Shinigami in a headlock and was punching out another, Ganju replied, "None of your business. Just know that all Shinigami are total bastards. Every last one of em!" His one opponent handled, Ganju turned his attention back to the one he'd been choking and punched him in the face as well.

Spotting still more Shinigami heading their way, Sado suggested, "Surely, there has to be some good Shinigami." Honestly, fighting so many Shinigami was growing tedious. They weren't even close to a challenge, but they were definitely wasting time.

"No chance," Ganju scoffed, "No such thing as a good Shinigami! Hope they all die screaming. Even that buddy of yours-" Ganju was interrupted by Sado taking out the entire approaching mob at once with a single use of El Directo. The young noble gaped in awe at his companion's power.

Seeing no more enemies, Sado dismissed his Brazo Derecha de Gigante. As he and Ganju left the scene, he turned towards the shorter man and warned him, "If you badmouth Ichigo again, I'll have to punch you." Having just witnessed the other man's destructive power, Ganju nodded frantically and resolved to keep his opinions to himself.

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Keeping her senses stretched to make sure none of the kids died, Yoruichi decided to amuse herself. It would be some time until they could make an actual attempt to rescue Nemu after all. Or more accurately, she needed a way to expose Aizen at the same time. If needed, she could probably break the lieutenant out and be out of Soul Society within fifteen minutes. But if Aizen was still free to act, it'd be for nothing; he could slaughter them all while still smelling like roses. Besides, so long as Yoruichi kept an eye on them, this would be a relatively safe way for the kids to grow stronger. The majority of Shinigami strong enough to be a threat wouldn't kill someone who was obviously beaten or surrendered, and she could bail them out if they fought someone who would. Even if she didn't manage to kill or stop Aizen here, having a group of powerful fighters who had never seen his shikai would be useful in the coming conflict.

Regardless, that was for later. For now, she needed some entertainment. Just as Yoruichi debated the merits of messing with that Byakuya kid she remembered, a patrol of the Stealth Forces passed beneath the roof she currently occupied. Given that they were talking about their mission, they were obviously rookies. "I'm surprised we're being sent out to hunt for the Ryoka. Surely the regular Shinigami would suffice for such a thing?" One of them asked.

The patrol's leader reprimanded him, "It's not our place to question orders. Captain Soifon told us to find the invaders and that's what we'll do." Following along on the roofs above, Yoruichi smirked as much as she could in her feline disguise. 'Captain Soifon is it? My little bee's all grown up it seems. And now I know just how to entertain myself.' Transforming back into her natural form, Yoruichi leapt down and knocked out all four of the ninjas before they even registered her presence. She then stripped them down and donned one of their uniforms for herself. Properly disguised, she locked the unconscious men inside a nearby supply closet and left for the 2nd Division barracks.

Fifteen minutes later, Yoruichi infiltrated the 2nd Division in the most effective way possible. She walked right in and acted like she was far too busy to talk to some random idiot wanting to know where she was going. Even better, unless little Soifon's signature had drastically changed, she wasn't anywhere nearby. Marching right into the captain's quarters, the ebony woman quickly set about her work. A quick search found what she was looking for and swiping a sheet gave the former captain a bag to keep all her loot in. All told, she was gone from the grounds within thirty seconds of entering the room.

-]|[-

Marching towards the 1st Division Assembly Hall, Hitsugaya Toshiro, youngest Shinigami Captain in history, muttered to himself, "A second meeting this week? And the third one this month? Just what is going on?" Despite his snow-white hair and serious expression, his short stature and youthful face gave him away for the boy he was, rather than the old man he sometimes acted as.

Arriving nearby and hurrying to walk alongside him was the equally white-haired but far more cheerful Ukitake Jūshirō, Captain of 13th Division and one of the longest serving captains in Soul Society. "Cheer up, Shiro-chan. It might be rather unusual but I'm sure this whole mess will be cleared up soon." While the current situation was relatively serious, Jūshirō had lived through true crises. By comparison, a small group of invaders and an unusual execution weren't that unsettling. Certainly unusual, but likely nothing to be too concerned about. As they reached the assembly hall, the pair found several captains already there, all simply standing at the entrance. "Hm, what's all this about?" Jūshirō questioned. In response, Captains Komamura (a hulking man in a helmet) and Aizen moved aside.

Hanging from the ceiling were several makeshift banners made of women's panties tied together. All different kinds at that: frilly ones with ribbons, plain white ones, and ones so small he could barely see them at this distance. As Jūshirō pondered just whose panties those were, and praying they weren't Unohana's, a new voice cut in, "What are you all gawking at? There's Ryoka wandering the Seireitei and you're all standing around like this?" Captain Soifon, a rather short and petite woman with her black hair kept in two wrapped braids, pushed her way to the front of the group. When she saw the panty streamers, Soifon stared in horror. Her mouth opened but no sound came out as her eyes widened. After several long seconds, she screamed, "WHO STOLE MY UNDERWEAR?!"

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Non-Canon Omake: Tan Her Hide

Said midget sputtered in shock, "T-tan my hide?! I'd like to see you try, you delinquent." Unfortunately, Ichigo didn't take kindly to her words and decided to take Rukia up on her "offer". Faster than she could react, he was already upon her. "Wait- what're you- lemme go!" Despite her protests, the young woman quickly found herself bent over his lap. Her own sash was used to bind her wrists before he pulled her hakama down.

Seeing Rukia's bare ass, Ichigo paused for a moment to admire the view. While Nemu's was larger and juicier, he had to admit, this Rukia girl had one magnificent peach of an ass. Raising his hand, Ichigo declared, "Count em, or they don't count."

Rukia barely had time to ponder his words before he struck her backside with jarring, almost bruising force. "GAH! How dare you, you bar- AH!" Rather than respond, the Ryoka smacked her buttocks again. And again. And again.

Sternly, he reminded the diminutive Shinigami, "I told you. Count em or they don't count." His statement was punctuated with another harsh slap.

"O-one," Rukia growled. She wasn't getting out of this on her own, but damn if she was going to be happy about it. Another smack. "Two." Another. "Three!" It was as she was rounding out ten that Rukia felt it. The spanking still hurt but the pain was starting to feel… good. Unbidden, a lewd moan escaped her lips, "Twelve~!"

Surprised at the sound, Ichigo paused in his slaps. 'Did she just-? No, I must have imagined it.' He brought his hand down on her jiggling cheeks once more, making sure to alternate as he went. After a few more strikes, Ichigo knew he wasn't imagining things. The woman across his lap was subtly thrusting her behind back towards him with each blow and his right knee felt distinctly wet. "You're getting off on this, aren't you?" He asked in both amusement and disbelief.

Shaking her head, Rukia denied any such thing, "N-n-no. Of course not!" But her claims felt weak, even to her, especially as she could feel her arousal trickling down her legs. A fresh blow caused her loudest cry yet, "AHN~! S-six…teen."

Ichigo merely chuckled, "In that case, you shouldn't have a problem reaching twenty then. Right?"

She tried to brace herself, but Rukia had never felt such things before. She wasn't a virgin by any means, but the pain and humiliation were making her pussy ache like nothing she'd ever felt before. Smack! "Sssseventeen!" SMACK! "Eight-t-t-teen!" No. She'd definitely never felt like this before. SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! "Nine-nine-nine!" On and on, he struck her poor abused ass. Both of her cheeks were glowing red. But she couldn't manage to finish counting. Summoning all her willpower, Rukia managed to force out, "Nineteen!"

At long last, the final blow landed. By pure coincidence, as Ichigo's palm impacted her ass cheek one final time, the tips of his fingers brushed against both her lower holes. In that instant, Rukia was undone. Her vision went white as lights exploded in front of her eyes. Her juices spurted out of her pussy, further staining Ichigo's robes. Her voice broke as she shrieked at the top of her lungs, "TWENTYYYYYYYYYYYyyyyyyyyy~!"

Ichigo allowed the passed-out Shinigami to fall from his lap, suddenly feeling very awkward. Even disregarding his throbbing erection, he hadn't expected the young woman to orgasm from being spanked. Certainly not to orgasm so powerfully that she passed out. After a moment, he pulled up her hakama and quickly left the area. He'd need a bit of "alone time" before he was ready to continue.

-]|[-

AN: First, two things I forgot to state last chapter. One is that Sado is using the evolved form of his Brazo Derecha de Gigante, the one that debuted in the Hueco Mundo arc. In canon, it felt like Yoruichi was mostly making sure Orihime and Sado could use their powers, rather than training them to be stronger. Or at least, that's my impression. Here, Sado had three weeks of fighting a captain level enemy, albeit one holding back. So his arm evolved. Two is Bambietta's rifle. I figured since some Quincy had crossbows or ballista or that one Commissioner Gordon looking guy who used a pistol, why not give her a rifle. Specifically, her rifle is based on the Karabiner 98k (main infantry rifle used by the Germans in WW2). Rather than nocking an arrow, she manipulates the bolt as a mnemonic for gathering and firing. Personal headcanon, since Ryūken can fire his bow onehanded, I assume the act of nocking and releasing an arrow is just a mnemonic to make "firing" Reishi easier.

As many of you guessed, Ichigo and Tatsuki fought Rukia and Ikkaku respectively in this chapter. Rukia is an actual seated member because she figured out someone had to be holding her back. She's nearing lieutenant level and still hasn't been promoted after forty years of service? So, Rukia went to Byakuya, learned that he's been interfering (though not why) and convinced him to stop holding her back by pointing out that 1) People are now assuming she's an utter failure given she's a Kuchiki who's still unseated after so long. 2) The highest ranks do have the most dangerous missions, but they're also mostly administrative jobs (outside the 11th). A 3rd Seat might be called to fight Gillians, but they'll be spending most of their time on the clock dealing with paperwork. So, she got promoted but because Rukia has no leadership experience, she's still only an 11th Seat for now even if she's stronger than her Division's 3rd Seats.

As for why Rukia's Byakurai simply hurt Ichigo instead of putting a hole in his head and killing him? Because unlike Byakuya, she cast it completely silently and she's considerably weaker than Ichigo. Were she on his level, he'd be 100% dead right now. As is? Rukia broke his nose but little else.

It was as I was writing Yoruichi's scene that I suddenly wondered, "Why didn't they use Yoruichi to save Rukia? She'd have gotten the ice midget back before Ichigo even woke up." So here, Yoruichi and Urahara do want to save Nemu, but she's less a priority than Aizen is. Or put another way, Urahara is helping Ichigo for the reasons he stated; he just didn't share EVERY reason.

Now for the only Author's Note anyone actually cares about. Next time on "Vow of the King"! Isane learns her tits are too small and Sado destroys the Fat Bastard tag!