DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING
NOTE: I know I am constantly apologizing to you guys and I hope you will forgive me for not updating in so long. I have had a lot of personal things happening in my life as well as family being very sick. I am back now though and I hope you're all ready for new chapters!
"Dodge!"
Carver yelled at Marian for what must have been the eighth time since they started. Fenris had been hesitant to agree to training her wanting her to rest but after a long argument had given in and he was splitting his attention between her and his son. Seeing Marian bite her lip he knew her patience was running out and proven right when she yelled.
"I am dodging! I've only been able to walk for less than three days! Your lucky I can move at all you ass!"
Lowering his weapon he regarded her critically before saying condescendingly.
"The Marian I know wouldn't make excuses. Perhaps when you have your memory back we can remind you that you're a true mage and fighter. Right now you're not even a challenge."
Immediately her friends stood up until they saw Fenris shake his head. This time Carver wasn't being an ass. He was trying to help Marian. By getting her upset she was bringing a part of her to the surface and he knew she'd attack this time. She had been holding back not wanting to hurt her brother and had left him no choice but to make her angry. By insulting her pride he knew that she wasn't going to hold back when she attacked again. In less than a second he was proven right.
Marian was becoming furious. They all expected something from her and she had been fighting for the better part of two hours. Her body ached and was sore, she had no idea was she was doing and still couldn't make her magic work the way she needed. Hearing her brother say such things to her however, was the last straw. Biting her lip and blinking back tears she felt hurt rising from inside her. She knew she never cried, just as she had known before that she didn't laugh. Looking at Carver she saw his face soften when he saw her misty eyes but that didn't stop her from swinging with all her might.
Ignoring his yell of pain she leaped at him ignoring her own searing pain as it shot up her leg and effectively pinned him before punching him across the mouth. Seeing him raise his hands defensively he smiled at her before saying.
"I'm sorry I had to be so harsh sister. I knew you needed a push."
Her face was still reflected with hurt and he looked at her pleadingly.
"Please sister."
Glaring at him her own face softened and she nodded before moving away from him. Watching him look to Fenris she rolled her eyes but said nothing. It seemed that while she was not herself they were looking to Fenris to make all the decisions. She had noticed right away that she had no problem with this and hadn't felt surprised at all. She had also learned that Fenris hated the healer Anders as did her son Leto.
Looking at them both she felt a smile grace her features. Her son was absolutely adorable and so smart. He had been upset that she couldn't remember him but he had forgiven her and was trying his best to help her including giving her tips that she had given him about magic. She found that out of everyone she liked training with Fenris and Carver best. Aveline was critical but fair but it was obvious that her state was taking its toll on Aveline and she had caught her crying after one of their spars.
Aveline had confided that she looked on Marian like the sister she never had and it broke her heart that she couldn't remember anything and Marian had began apologizing and frowned confused when Aveline had started laughing. She had quickly said that Marian should not be apologizing for things that weren't her fault but Marian had still felt like she should. After they had talked for a bit longer the older woman had calmed down and they had continued sparring like nothing had happened.
She had quickly noticed that she wanted to laugh more when she trained with Varric and Isabela. They had amazing stories of things they swore she had done but Fenris had quickly interrupted on the times they were lying for which she was grateful. It seemed out of their group of friends they were definitely the storytellers and naughtier of the group apart from Zevran. He had attempted to flirt with her for a second before getting told off by both Fenris and Charade and seeing her cheeks turn pink at Fenris's passionate words he had winked at her again.
Varric had told her stories about their relationship but she had waved him off saying if she was to remember something about Fenris or their child she wanted the information to come from them and not others. Varric had easily understood but had reminded her softly that he knew about as much about their son as she did. This had racked her with guilt and she had had to stop training for the better part of the afternoon. No one had been able to cheer her up until her son had bounced into her lap and whispered that Fenris would forgive her and she marveled at such strength from such a small child.
Her heart was breaking that her son should have to be so strong but she didn't know what to do except be there for him in anyway she could. It seemed to be working so far, but he could tell that she was hiding something and wasn't as happy as she pretended. He had wanted to approach his father about it but didn't think it would help so he hadn't said anything and Marian had known that too after hearing him debate with himself so she'd pushed harder with herself to try and show everyone she was okay.
Sebastian and Charade were amazingly patient and kind both being more gentle with her than most and she was both grateful and upset by this. She wanted to be stronger and put her full energy into fighting and she knew they were holding back. This would anger her after awhile and she hadn't wanted to be rude or upset them so she would claim to be tired even though they knew she was lying.
With Anders she tried not to be close with him. His words rang clear in her mind and he'd made many more veiled comments that made her stomach cringe and made her more apprehensive. She always felt sick after his training and knew that Fenris had noticed. Immediately after their training sessions she would practically run to their son and hold him like he was going to disappear.
Hearing her name she was shaken from her musings and looked up to see Fenris gazing at her pensively. Feeling her heartbeat quicken in a way that had become very familiar in the past few days when their eyes met she asked what he had said.
"I asked if you felt well enough to train with me."
He asked again not looking away from her eyes. After remaining silent a long moment and forcing her heart to calm she nodded before holding on to her staff tighter. The first time she'd picked it up she'd been so startled she dropped it earning laughs before her friends realized she really didn't know what she was doing and Leto had been the first to help her earning him a grateful hug and kiss. Now she knew more or less what to do and could move with some accuracy but it was clear she was a novice where her friends needed her to be a master and the pressure was not lost on her.
Fenris was different though. He never pushed or asked for anything he simply tried to help her. He occasionally spoke in his low tone and she always felt her face warm and her heart beat wildly or flutter as fast as wings. His eyes and voice seemed to touch her very soul and the few times their skin had touched she felt as if she'd been shocked in the very best of ways. She longed to remember what they had been before. He seemed at times to want that too but she knew his anger and hurt were still nursing and it would take time to heal.
Yelping in pain as she fell to the ground she saw Fenris drop his weapon quietly before taking her weapon from her. Gently pulling her up she felt her skin tingle as it usually did and found her breathing was shaky. Standing up slowly she waited for him to drop her hand but he didn't. Instead, he leaned closer. Ignoring the stares they were getting from his friends and not seeing the hand that Carver had clamped over Leto's mouth to keep his excited squeals quiet, he leaned in to Marian before saying softly.
"You're not focused. Something is distracting you."
Lowering her gaze she said nothing opting to rest her gaze on his hand still holding hers and noticed a red sash tied around his wrist. Staring at it for a long moment she felt herself touching it and felt his skin under it as well. Hearing him take a shaky breath she looked up confused until she saw his eyes. Their was so much emotion in his eyes. She saw pain, longing, and lust that made her own breath turn shaky, but with all of that there was love. She could see it. Squeezing his hand gently she asked without words and after a long moment he answered.
"You gave this to me as a symbol of your love."
Looking at it again she didn't raise her gaze until she heard her son speaking rapidly and looked up to see her friends staring at them with knowing smirks and felt her face heat up before she looked at Fenris to see him shifting uncomfortably at the attention. Feeling protective of him she moved in front of him before asking.
"Shouldn't you all be training for this big enemy we have? Were supposed to be getting ready to save a city right?"
After watching the couple for a moment longer, they finally began moving away and after Fenris agreed to let Carver and Varric watch their son she felt him take her hand and spin her around.
"Thank you for that."
Smiling she nodded and said.
"I guess we should get back to training."
He had quickly agreed and began teaching her evasive techniques thinking it would help until she got her strength back and they continued in passable silence for a long while until she missed seeing his foot shoot out to trip her and she felt herself falling only to swipe hers back at him effectively tripping him as well and he landed directly on top of her resulting in her wind being knocked out of her chest. Feeling hard muscle against her she was silently thankful she'd seen him take off his armor. If he hadn't she would be a bloody mess right now. Feeling him shift above her she let out an involuntary gasp when she felt his breath hit her neck. Noticing the change he glanced at her for a moment before saying softly.
"Are you alright?"
Nodding she said nothing not trusting her voice. She had felt a pull to Fenris since she woke up and while she couldn't explain it, she trusted it. She knew that she and Fenris were in love and for her that was all she needed to know. She knew on instinct he wouldn't hurt her and that he would protect her but she wished with all her heart she could remember him and their son. Looking at him for a long moment she noticed that neither one of them were moving and his breath was now hitting her face and his mouth was centimeters away from hers. Forcing her gaze away from his lips and onto his eyes she saw him frowning at her and she let out a small laugh surprising them both.
When she stopped she felt his fingers intertwine with hers and she felt the ribbon once again. Tugging it gently capturing his full attention she said.
"I don't know why I hurt you and I have no right to ask you what I am about to but I need to know something desperately."
Not seeing any sign of him rejecting her she continued.
"I have heard them tell me the reasons I hid Leto from you and everyone else and I know what they tell me we were, but…."
Her voice trailed off and she wondered for a moment if she should go on. Feeling him squeeze her in the barest of touches she spoke so quietly he had to lean directly over her mouth to hear her. Her voice was small and unsure. So unlike the Marian he knew and loved and as angry as he was he felt his heart soften the slightest bit at her words.
"Will you help me remember?"
And that's all for now. In the next chapter some family secrets are revealed, we get some good drama and some romance is in the air! Please review guys!