Disclaimer: I do not own My Hero Academia/Boku No Hero Academia, or any other property in this work that I did not make myself.
Hizashi Yamada vs. the robot uprising
Chapter three: Super Fighting Robots
Robo Kinoko and Robo Bakugo rushed right at one another, punching each other in the face upon getting within melee range. Robo Bakugo reached forward and gripped Robo Kinoko on the left shoulder with his right hand, then began squeezing harder. "Oh snap!" Tetsutetsu said as he and Kirishima watched the fight, "He's trying to crush her shoulder with his kung-fu grip!"
Luckily for Robo Kinoko, she was able to smack Robo Bakugo's arm away, then jumped back a bit as she aimed her right fist so that it was pointed right at the face of the surprised Robo Bakugo. "Rocket Punch!" Robo Kinoko exclaimed as her fist then flew off from her wrist, flying right at Robo Bakugo's face and making a metallic clanking sound upon striking him dead center.
"Robo Kinoko has Rocket Punch!" Kirishima exclaimed as Robo Kinoko's fist flew back to her, "Oh man that is so cool!" As Robo Kinoko reattached her fist to where it came off of, the human boys saw it that her Rocket Punch attack had smashed up Robo Bakugo's nose, and motor oil was now running out of where his nostrils would be if they hadn't been sealed up by the smashing.
Robo Bakugo merely wiped the oil away with the back of his right hand. "Your continued meddling against me delays my ability to carry out my primary function," Robo Bakugo said.
"Your trying to carry out your primary function works against my ability to carry out my primary function," Robo Kinoko replied.
As the two robots who want to get it on with Kirishima continued to argue, Kirishima himself turned to look at Tetsutetsu. "...I hope none of the teachers have to deal with something like this," said the red haired boy.
Shrugging, Tetsutetsu replied, "Given what we've been through thus far, I don't think that cleaning up this here mess that Power Loader-sensei made is the worst thing on the list."
...
Aizawa, Hound Dog, and Luci met back up with Sekijiro, Tanjiro, and Zenitsu, and the combined six of them were taking on what was left of the robotic versions of Sekijiro's students, aside from Robo Kinoko who never went haywire. The robots here did include the robotic versions of the other girls that were in 1-B, though. "I will sue you for every yen you got and then invest it wisely!" Robo Ibara said as she bore down on Zenitsu.
"Crikey, you're a daft badger of a git," Robo Pony said as she confronted Tanjiro, "I'm fit to go to the pub for a pint while watching Football on the telly!"
"Jewish Ibara and British Pony will never get out of my head!" Sekijiro screamed as he clenched the side of his head, "Why Power Loader, WHY?!"
Tanjiro, approximately as freaked as the Blood Hero, screamed, "HINOKAMI KAGURA!" as he cut off the heads of Robo Ibara and Robo Pony, destroying them with the highest form of Demon Slayer breath styles, a circle of flames trailing along in the pattern his Nichirin Sword carved a path in.
Aizawa, after destroying Robo Itsuka, remarked, "And to think, this isn't the most difficult challenge I've dealt with in recent events!"
"Oh is this about the Arceus boss fight in the final mission in Legends again?" Hound Dog asked after throwing the headless body of one of the male robotic 1-B students to the side.
Turning to look at Hound Dog, Aizawa said, "That fight was utterly absurd! I swear, It was a long and hard punishment right up the ass!" Once more, Aizawa heard a cry of aroused, sensual pleasure moan in the distance.
The fight was soon whittling down, and within good time the last of the rogue 1-B student robots had been destroyed. As the good guys were catching their breath, Hizashi came running on in with Muzan and Inosuke in tow. "What's the sitch, Sho?" Hizashi asked.
"We just... just finished destroying the last of the rogue robots based off of Sekijiro's students who died containing the zombie apocalypse," Aizawa said as he tried catching his breath, "The only robot based off of a dead 1-B student that hasn't been destroyed is Robo Komori, and she isn't a threat as she never went rogue."
Gesturing to himself and the guys he came in with, Hizashi said, "Muzan, Inosuke, and I saw Robo Iida and Robo Todoroki fly overhead and we were following them just now. Robo Midoriya landed near his human version's mom, but we destroyed him before he could hurt her."
"You mean I destroyed him!" Inosuke said, "Quit trying to steal credit for my kills!"
"You know, there are more important things to be concerned about than having the highest kill count," Zenitsu said to Inosuke.
Turning to look at Zenitsu, the boar masked Demon Slayer simply looked on at him. After a few moments of silence, Inosuke shrugged. "...Okay, you got me. What are some examples?"
As Zenitsu face palmed, Tanjiro asked, "Well since all of the 1-B robot students we should be concerned about have been destroyed, let's move onto destroying what's left of the 1-A student robots."
"Robo Iida and Robo Todoroki went straight in that direction," Hizashi said, pointing the way and leading the rest of the group off in that direction to continue hunting down the rogue robots based off of the first year hero course students who had all died in containing the zombie apocalypse a short while ago.
...
Meanwhile, Tensei Iida was enjoying a nice coffee at an outdoor café that was wheelchair accessible because Stain had once had a very serious talk with Tensei. As Tensei was enjoying his coffee, Robo Iida landed a dozen feet away, getting Tensei's attention. "Subject two point four meters ahead identified as Tensei Iida," Robo Iida said as he walked up after Tensei turned to see what was going on.
"A robotic version of my late little brother?!" Tensei exclaimed.
Robo Iida then turned around, bent over and was slightly squatted as if he were going to take a dump, then wooden yardsticks proceeded to be dispensed out of Robo Iida's anus like tickets being dispensed out of a ticket printer at the movies. "...I know people said that Tenya always had a stick up his ass," Tensei remarked as he saw what he was bearing witness to, "But this is a bit of a gross over-exaggeration if you a-"
Tensei was cut off when Hizashi came in and, with a single Flying Crane Kung Fu Mantis Kick, kicked off and smashed Robo Iida's head, destroying him and saving Tensei from being harassed by the robotic version of his late younger brother. "Present Mic?" Tensei said, then he saw the rest of Hizashi's group arrive on the scene. "What the hell's going on here?!"
Sighing in a resigned tone, Aizawa explained, "Power Loader who turned out to have survived after all was remade into a cyborg by his students in UA's support course. After that he proceeded to make robotic versions of all of me and Sekijiro's students who had died recently. All of those robots save for Robo Komori went haywire and got loose, so now were trying to track all of them down to destroy them and keep them from causing terror."
Gesturing to where the smashed remains of Robo Iida was laying on the ground, Tensei said, "Well this robotic version of my late younger brother which was just destroyed by Present Mic had been dispensing wooden yard sticks out of its ass before it was destroyed just now."
"Yeah, Power Loader was... creative... when he was making the robotic versions of me and Shouta's late students," Sekijiro replied, a bit embarrassed, "So, uhh, what are you up to?"
"Well I was having a coffee before I did some playing on my Switch," Tensei said, "If there's one silver lining to being crippled by Stain, it's that it's given me extra down time for video games. I've completed the national dex in BDSP as much as possible because certain mythicals are still out of everyone's reach in that game, and after completing all of the main missions in Legends Arceus I've taken to hunting mass outbreaks for shinies."
Gesturing to himself, Hound Dog said, "I found and caught an alpha Hisuian Growlithe. It even came with an adamant nature. Evolved it into Hisuian Arcanine straight away."
"DUDE!" Tensei exclaimed, "You have an alpha Hisuian Arcanine now?! You lucky son of a bitch! That's the alpha I'm wanting to get the most! And it's got a good nature too!"
"This... has been enlightening, to be sure," Zenitsu said, "But we ought to get back on track. Tensei, have you seen any robotic versions of dead UA students around here, aside from the one based off of your dead little brother?"
Shrugging, Tensei said, "Sorry, but Robo Tenya had been my first encounter with any of those robots. I tend not to get out much most days." Scowling a bit, Tensei added, "A downside to Stain having crippled me."
"We can invite you to hang out at UA in the lounge after we finish up the issue with the robots," Hizashi offered, "But until then, I wish you adieu my good si-"
Hizashi was cut off when his smartphone went off in his pocket, so he pulled it out. "Yo yo yo, you got Hizashi Yamada aka Present Mic," Hizashi said, "What's happening my mai-"
"Hizashi-sensei!" Tetsutetsu yelled on the other end, cutting Hizashi off, "Kirishima and I are here at UA, with Robo Kinoko trying to fight off Robo Bakugo in order to protect Kirishima's virginity! How's the hunt for the robots outside of UA going?!"
"We only got some robots based off of the boys from Sho's class left to go!" Hizashi said, "You, Kirishima, and Robo Komori try to keep Robo Bakugo occupied until then!"
"Please hurry!" Tetsutetsu pleaded, "Kirishima's butthole is at stake here!" The call then ended, prompting Hizashi to put his phone away and then to look at the others.
"We gotta hurry it up with destroying the remaining robo boys from Sho's class," Hizashi said, "Tetsutetsu, Kirishima, and Robo Komori have Robo Bakugo occupied over at UA! But there's no way to tell for how long they can manage it, especially since Kirishima is the target of Robo Bakugo's programmed lust!"
Tensei, with a wide eyed looked of shocked, mildly confused surprise on his face, said, "Umm... I'm sorry but what was that?"
"Long story short," Inosuke said, "Robo Bakugo wants to rape Kirishima because Power Loader thought that Bakugo and Kirishima were gay for one another."
Tensei continued to look on at the guys with a look of wide eyed surprise on his fave. "How... how has Power Loader not been fired from UA yet?"
"How have I not been fired from UA yet?" Hizashi replied, "Anyway, come on guys! We got the rest of the rogue robots to hunt down and destroy before heading back to UA to save the boys and the one good robot!" With Hizashi leading the way, the group ran off to hunt down the remaining robots, all of them hoping it won't be too late by the time that they get to UA to save Kirishima, Tetsutetsu, Robo Kinoko, and Kirishima's butt from Robo Bakugo.
Later, after destroying Robo Ojiro (I don't know if he's been destroyed yet and I'm too lazy to check so fuck it), Hizashi wiped his forehead with the back of his right hand. "Whew!" Hizashi exclaimed, "That's the last of the robots!"
"Except for Robo Komori and Robo Bakugo," Aizawa said, "And we only really have to worry about dealing with the latter."
"Can we just get back to UA already?" Hound Dog asked, "I was cracking into the first Harry Potter book because I'm going to read through all of them again."
Turning to look at Hound Dog, Sekijiro said, "You still read Harry Potter? After all this time?"
Turning around to regard the Blood Hero, Hound Dog replied, "...Always."
"We only have the one robot left anyway," Hizashi remarked. Raising a shovel he had to point the way, Hizashi said, "To UA! Tally ho!"
"Ah, don't use tally ho!" Sekijiro exclaimed, "I'm going to have nightmares of British Pony for ages!"
...
Back at UA, Hizashi and all of his group all ran into the main building, only to come upon a most disturbing scene; Robo Kinoko and Robo Bakugo had pierced one anothers' chests with their fists, and were now stuck together, both very clearly running on fumes.
"W-Woah," Hizashi said, "They fought to a mutual ki-"
"Activating second wind subroutine!" Robo Bakugo said, pulling his fist out of Robo Kinoko's chest before kicking her over. He then turned on Kirishima and began advancing on him. "Preparing to carry out primary-mary-mary function," Robo Bakugo said, clearly damaged and about to go down soon, but he was still determined to carry out what he was programmed to carry out.
"Ahhhhhh!" Kirishima cried out in alarm, "I'm going to be raped by Robo-Baku-bro!"
"Must completely primate-mary function-al-coholic," Robo Bakugo said as he steadily advanced on his target, "Anally assault Eijiro-shambo no less than eight-eight-eight-my quinceañera."
END, CHAPTER THREE
Author's notes;
This chapter sees a lot of the robots destroyed, although Robo Kinoko isn't quite so successful in stopping Robo Bakugo who manages to overcome his damage to a degree and advance right on Kirishima, mostly for drama. Anyway, the next chapter will be the last for this story, so keep your eyes peeled for how the robot uprising ends.