Chapter 17

When Izara reported for her shift, she was handed a note asking her to see the Fire Lord at 1pm the next day. Of course, she would arrive at 12.45pm promptly, in her formal guard's outfit and be ready for anything. Maybe it was just to discuss their next training session or her progress since she'd started. She'd been here for about 6 months now. As she walked to her post, she smiled as she remembered the last time she saw the Fire Lord, when they had noodles the previous week. She had since been back to the restaurant after the first time he'd taken her there, tried a few different dishes, and was impressed by them. No wonder it was popular with the Fire Lord himself.

He always felt terrible when busy and couldn't schedule training sessions with her. However, she ensured that she worked hard on her own so that he was impressed with her progress every time they trained. Kazan had been helping her out, and she had worked with Ming a few times as well, and although her bending was excellent, she wasn't as aggressive in her offence as Izara was. Ming was very technical and graceful, but Izara subconsciously focused on the technique's efficacy in using it for either attack or defence. This probably came from previous experience learning how to get a good hit in quickly or die. Since she was in the same training group as Zhang, they had worked together a few times. Izara, Mika, Kaina, Ming, Zhang and even Luan had a chance to train together twice. It was great as they could simulate fighting against several opponents.

After her uneventful shift, she reported just when the sun began to rise. Since she needed to be up around midday to have time to prepare for the formal visit, she bathed quickly and went straight to bed. She woke up briefly when Mika left for her shift, but Kaina had the day off and must have been sleeping. Finally, when Kaina got up later, it was around 10am, and Izara let herself doze for another hour or so. Although she didn't reasonably need to get up yet, she was too nervous that she would oversleep and miss her meeting, so she got up and dressed for the day. She put on her uniform underclothes and went to get something to eat.

Ling was there, and they chatted happily while she filled her tray with the fantastic dishes available. She was there a bit earlier than usual, which was nice as they hadn't seen each other for a while. Izara had made a habit of asking about Ling's family, which consisted of a husband three years her senior and two children who were both young adults. Her daughter, the oldest child, was studying to become a doctor, and her youngest, a son, was working for one of the giant manufacturing plants in the Fire Nation. She supposed that she shouldn't be surprised, considering that Ling was one of the head chefs in the palace and a much brighter woman that some people would take her for. It seemed she was happiest helping others, even though some wouldn't see it as a full use of her talents and intelligence. Every little thing was perfectly organised when Ling worked, showing her skill. Every time Izara thanked her, a beaming smile took over her face, making her feel like Ling was happy. After all the times she had fed her and brightened her day, especially when unsure or worried, she wanted to be sure that she paid her back for her kindness.

Once she'd eaten, returned her tray and thanked Ling, she headed towards the Fire Lord's office for her official meeting. She had met him plenty of times before but had seen him more outside his office than anything else, so she wasn't sure what this was about.

Wen was in her usual spot, and she greeted her with a polite bow and mentioned her name, but Wen had a brief knowing smile that said she knew exactly who she was. After she told her to sit down, Wen continued with paperwork and whatever her role entailed. Izara couldn't hear what was being said. Still, another meeting was clearly going on inside the Fire Lord's office, and she waited patiently, sitting quietly.

Around fifteen minutes later, the door to the office opened, and two officials she had never seen before exited. The Fire Lord was in his formal robes and held the door open, smiling professionally until he saw her. His smile changed and showed in his eyes as they became more vibrant. She stood and bowed but didn't move from her spot, unsure if he was ready for her. He gestured towards the office with a nod, and she nodded once in understanding before following him.

Sokka, Suki, Toph, Katara and Avatar Aang were waiting for her inside the office, and her pace slowed as she went inside. The Fire Lord closed the door behind her, but she did her best not to let her concern show on her face and looked as blank as she could manage. This sort of thing was somewhat new to her, but she supposed that many things had changed since she'd arrived in the Capital. So far, the change has been good.

"How you doin'?" Sokka said and gave her a mini salute.

"Well, thank you. And yourself?" She responded as calmly as she could but didn't take a seat, even though there was clearly one set out for her. Instead, she stood at attention like any good soldier would do. All that time with her Uncle had hopefully taught her something, and she didn't react as Sokka gave her a thumbs up and a wink in reply.

"Izara." The Fire Lord's voice sounded from next to her as he walked to sit back at his desk. "Thank you for coming." Once he had sat down, he glanced at Suki, who began to speak.

"So, you need to go up to the advanced group. You're outpacing the others far too much." Suki offered, and although she sounded diplomatic, a friendly glint in her eye made her feel more at ease.

"It's about time you showed us what you're truly capable of." The Fire Lord seemed proud, looking quite regal, particularly in his formal garb.

"May I speak freely, my Lord?" She asked quietly, unsure how this would go over, but the time had come to be upfront.

"Of course." His response was calm, and he seemed ready.

After a deep breath, she began to regale the tale of how things had come to this.

"So, as you know, my father was in the Navy and passed when I was quite young. My mother followed after being ill for some time, and I was about 10 years old. Unfortunately, I didn't have any other family I knew about, and I ended up on the streets. I am ashamed to admit that there were plenty of things I did to survive that aren't in moral high standing. Eventually, I got a name for myself when I was still quite young, and I could earn enough to feed myself by stealing." She relaxed her stance slightly as she spoke, unable to hide her occasional twitch of nervousness.

"I got to the point where I was hired by our side to steal information from the other side while the war was still on. There were...other things that I was asked to do as well. I'll admit that I completed these duties for no other reason than the selfish purpose of surviving. I will graciously accept the punishment deserving of such things, and I know I deserve worse."

She took another deep breath and dropped to her knees with a loud thud. Not looking up from the floor out of embarrassment and fear, she knew it was time for judgement.

"I will accept any punishment given to me. I only wish to make up for the sins I have committed and to make things right." Izara was a mix of scared and relieved that this moment had come. She was nervous because she wasn't sure what would happen, but relieved that she had gotten the chance to be honest and hopefully begin making things right.

As she kept her eyes on the floor, she couldn't see the eyes of those around her, including Toph, indicating that she was telling the truth. Zuko looked towards Aang, who was lost in thought for a moment before he returned Zuko's gaze and nodded once. It was all Zuko needed to understand that Izara was trying her best to right those wrongs. He could hear it in her voice and had no doubt that the memories that were undoubtedly swirling through her mind were traumatising. He understood her, having regrets about his life and the choices he had made in the past.

Hearing silence for a minute, then the sound of a deep inhale and exhale from the Fire Lord, she waited in silence, staring at the floor and decided a formal bow would be best. She placed her hands on the floor in front of her and bowed her head to almost touch the base.

"What punishment do you think is just?" His voice was quiet, but the statement itself boomed loudly. She did her best not to shrink down smaller, feeling that she wanted to face the demons in her past head-on.

"I think you are a far better judge of what I deserve, my Lord." She didn't raise her head fully, but just enough so that her voice wouldn't be too muffled by the floor.

"Are you not judging yourself, though? Have you not been punishing yourself already?" The voice of the Avatar was soft but firm, and she felt that a thousand voices had combined together to make up his own. Probably just a trick of her mind.

His words did ring with truth, though. It reminded her that she had spent the last few years parading around military camps with her Uncle, dealing with his neglect, living as a shell of a human being. Maybe it had been her way of punishing herself, not allowing herself to live a decent life and be happy. She had just been existing, barely surviving.

"You said you wanted to make up for your sins? To make things right?" Zuko still spoke quietly, and she nodded in confirmation. "Then, are you not doing this at the moment? By working in the palace and helping me to build a better future for our people."

He was right; she couldn't do anything to right the wrongs in her past by doing nothing. At least now, she was taking a more active role in her life and trying to do the right thing. Something was better than nothing.

"I will commit myself to complete this duty in any way you see fit." Keeping her head down, she was still unsure what would happen but was resolved to see it through.

"In my past, I would have told you that you did your duty and that you did what you needed to survive. Now I know that making amends is not just part of the healing process for you but for your loved ones. I will ask you to make peace with them and do as they ask to give them justice and closure." The Fire Lord rose from his seat and knelt before Izara as he spoke.

"Yes, my Lord." Her head stayed down until she saw the tips of her fingers.

Raising her head, she sat back slightly until she could see his serious expression. He had reached out his hand towards her, and she hesitantly placed her hand in his, and he helped her to stand. Once they had stood, they were only a foot apart, and she felt more relieved than anything else. Abruptly, he broke out into a wistful smile and once she saw this, her shoulders relaxed, her jaw unclenched, and she felt a calm come over her.

"If I can be of help to you, to assist you in righting your wrongs, please let me know. I understand the process quite well." His partly ashamed expression told her all she needed to know about how he felt on the matter.

"Thank you, my Lord. I am truly sorry to have kept this from you. It was not something I did maliciously." She could feel that things were okay between them, and her relief increased exponentially. That's what she was worried about the most. He would see or hate her differently if he knew exactly what she had done.

"I know." His tone was all the compassion she needed to feel like they were okay.

The air in the room was already lighter, similar to the weight off her shoulders. Just by knowing she wasn't alone in her quest for atonement and feeling she was on the right path, she felt better than she had in years.

"So, does this mean you'll move to the advanced group?" Suki piped up after there was a few moments of silence.

"I think that can be arranged." The Fire Lord's reply was a command politely phrased as a request.

Izara bowed her head in answer and obeisance. At least this was a step in the right direction. She could ask for his assistance in finding out about the family members and loved ones of those she had assassinated all that time ago. It had been many years now, so she would only be able to track them down through the name of her targets, which she had burnt in her mind. The horrors she had seen and committed would never be erased completely, but she was pleased to know she wasn't alone.

"Now we've got that out of the way. Let's train!" Katara spoke for the first time; her kind voice was encouraging.

All of them got up from their seats and shuffled out the door, Wen seeing them off with a bow. Izara followed suit since she had been asked to attend the training with them. She felt somewhat out of the group, but that didn't last long, as Katara and Suki walked beside her and chatted with her to make her feel more comfortable. Katara asked what products made her hair smell so lovely and kept it soft as they walked together. Toph was up with the boys, and they joked with each other, Toph punching Sokka in the arm after he teased her.

When they got to the training grounds, Zuko removed some of his formal robes, showing that he had dressed comfortably underneath. She wished she had known they would be training now since she wasn't dressed for exercise. There was a seat set up with water bottles and some snacks, which Wen had probably done for them. Suki suggested she run inside and get something more comfortable for training. She sprinted back to her dorm room and threw on her training gear before speeding back to the grounds.

They were warming up, and Toph worked through a set with Aang when Izara returned. Katara took the lid off her water skin and began moving the water around her, making it look as easy as breathing. Suki was stretching, leaning side to side and touching her toes. Zuko was taking deep breaths, and Sokka swung his arms in circles. Izara wasn't quite sure why Zuko had asked her to attend. Still, she was probably going to end up killing herself in the process of trying to keep up with these masters. Sokka came over to her and nudged her with his elbow, noticing the concern on her face.

"Ever tried to use a boomerang before?" He asked with a smirk, and she shook her head.

He was trying to make her feel welcome, so he showed her the basic technique of throwing a boomerang. They went to a nearby target set up, and she tried her hand for around fifteen minutes. Sokka was an excellent teacher; she improved but couldn't quite get the hang of it. She did have fun learning, though and began to relax. Toph came over to interrupt and asked to borrow Izara. She blinked and nodded, following Toph over to where Aang was.

"Okay, I need another opinion. I'm using a better combination, but Twinkletoes thinks his combination is superior. We need someone to decide."

Both showed their earthbending combinations, and Izara could see their different styles and personalities. Aang was using a more defensive technique, and Toph was more offensive. However, there was a minor weakness in both, and Izara used all her courage to point it out.

"Each combination is clearly different, but each has a weakness." Izara approached Aang first and showed the flaw by asking him to stop on a certain transition. "Here, you'll be weak to an attack on the right, but Toph would be weak on the left in your combo. I'd suggest stepping with your left leg first, allowing you to defend around you better." Thoroughly nervous at first, she utilised her decisive style to try and improve both combos by combining them. This way, she acknowledged their skills and was polite to everyone.

"Nice, I like it!" Toph tried it out a few times and grinned at her. It felt like Toph was trying to involve her and already knew what she would say, but she appreciated it nonetheless.

Aang agreed with a nod and grinned too. "Thanks, Izara!"

"Izara." The Fire Lord called out to her and tossed a bottle of water at her. She caught it somewhat awkwardly and smiled appreciatively as she cracked it open and had a mouthful.

As she walked back over to the seat to put it down, Zuko gently placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Well, now is the best time to ask questions. You should make the most of it with all of us here." He suggested with a chuckle.

"Now that you say it, I have a question about the fourth advanced form." Izara was stuck on a specific transition and couldn't remember what leg she had to step with to get to the next part.

Zuko ran through the form with her, and Aang came to join them, admitting he had somewhat neglected to practise some firebending forms, making Zuko frown at him. The others were practising in a group, working happily as the three worked on their firebending for just half an hour. No longer feeling left out, Izara continued asking questions, taking the most of the opportunity. She also enjoyed seeing Aang in action; his ability to switch between one bending style and another was incredible. His knowledge and ability to use bending styles in fusion made them all stronger. When they took a break, Toph showed her the meteor bracelet and talked about how she discovered metal bending, leaving Izara with her mouth open in stunned silence. She was talking about it as if it was just as simple as folding paper. Izara was shocked that she had done something so revolutionary at such a young age. Not only that, but she was continuing to develop it and was even able to teach others as well.

Suki asked Izara to help her teach Katara one of the throws from her sessions by demonstrating. Katara picked it up quickly, as expected, and Izara noticed that it was inspired by waterbending. Suki was truly impressive, and Izara had begun to see the influence she was taking from other bending styles in her martial arts, taking knowledge from as many sources as she could. Izara was enjoying herself immensely and feeling like she didn't need to hold back with these guys. Suki was incredibly talented, and since she couldn't hide her skill anymore, at least now she could learn and feel like she could improve and work towards redemption by being a good palace guard.

The clash of swords caught her attention, and she watched Sokka and Zuko square off for a few minutes as she had some more water. Sokka was using a beautiful sword, and Zuko was his twin blades. Both showed mastery over their weapon, and it was enthralling to watch. Katara offered to show her a waterbending form, which she happily accepted. They spent the next half an hour going through a basic form together. Katara showed her the application with the water, and Izara followed along with the movements and tried to get the internal feeling right. It wasn't easy since she was used to different breathing patterns and weight transitions. Still, it was interesting to learn something diametrically opposed to what was ingrained in her. She had fun experimenting and could see why Suki had become so talented without bending skills; she had all these sources of knowledge to draw from, so she was just as dangerous without bending.

They all worked in small groups and pairs for another hour, sharing their vast knowledge. Izara was beginning to feel hungry when Sokka started complaining about his hunger. They all decided to call it quits for the day. Zuko had purposely kept the rest of the day free from meetings and appointments so he could enjoy a relaxing afternoon with his friends.

After returning to their rooms to bathe and clean up, they agreed to meet back at the library for an early dinner. The guest rooms were in the hallway to the left of the Fire Lord's chambers, so everyone except Zuko and Izara headed in that direction.

"How was that for a training session?" Zuko asked with a cheeky grin, gesturing for them to walk towards the guard dormitories.

"I think my brain has melted," Izara answered with a smirk, and Zuko laughed.

"I thought you'd enjoy seeing the different bending styles and take some inspiration from it."

"It was great. I've not been able to just appreciate the other bending styles. I've only seen them when someone was trying to kill me. I never expected to see Airbending in my life either." She replied, trying to show her appreciation and gratitude for her invitation.

"Good to hear. You're welcome to come to our sessions anytime. Not that we're any good at scheduling them. We are usually too busy or busy being lazy." Zuko added with a shrug.

"Naturally. You are all in very high demand. Can't help being popular. Everyone just wants a piece of you." Izara nudged him with her elbow, and he rolled his eyes at her joke.

"I wish they wouldn't." He said with a sigh. "There's only a small number of people I have all the time in the world for."

Izara smiled and slowed to a stop as they reached the hallway leading to the guard's dormitories. Zuko did the same and smiled at her with a fondness she found surprising but flattering.

"I hope you know you are one of those people." He offered casually before turning on the ball of his foot to head back the way he came. "See you in the library soon!"

Leaving her in the middle of the hallway, stunned, Izara snapped out of it as she saw the guard rotation start. She quickly zipped to her dorm, grabbed some clean clothes, and headed to the bathrooms. After cleaning up and changing, she headed back towards the library, already hearing Toph, Sokka and Suki chatting. Toph must have felt her approach, and the girls slowed to wait for her, but Sokka kept going towards where the food would be.

"What's up with you? Your heart is racing." Toph was making a face at her, with her brows knitted and her nose scrunched up.

"Uh, must be the adrenaline from the training session. It was great." Izara tried to brush it off, but she felt it was because of Zuko's comment earlier. Although he said it somewhat off-handedly, she could feel that he meant every word.

Toph only responded with a smirk and then continued towards the library, laughing as she went. Suki looked between Izara and Toph's backs before she shrugged and shook her head. Izara shrugged in reply, and they both headed towards the library.

Sokka was sitting inside at the biggest table with his arms crossed over his chest. There wasn't any food there yet, so he was sulking, and Zuko was comforting him. Katara and Aang were on the other side of the table, having a drink from whatever juice was in the carafe on the table. Once they were all seated, everyone conversed happily until the food arrived, and they all began eating. Izara didn't feel left out, despite how tightly knit their group was, and they made her feel very welcome and involved, just as they had in the training session.

When it got to around 11pm, she was too tired to stay up, and the rest of the group was also tired. They all said goodnight and headed back to their rooms. Zuko was talking with Aang briefly as the others were getting up to leave, so Izara left them be and just bowed quietly before heading off to her dorm.

After changing into her pyjamas, and once her head hit the pillow, it only took another two or three deep breaths before she was out cold…