Married… with a Useless Goddess 13
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They say a lot can happen in 10 years to your community as it grows alongside with you, for better or worst.
And that couldn't be more true than Kazuma, an adult male who was approaching his 30's, and during all this time he chose to stay in the town his grandfather had helped nurtured throughout his life, hoping to gain some semblance of his legacy.
And to an extent he has in the background as he was there to help out his long time friend Ozu, but otherwise he was just another face in the crowed, in spite of being only one of 3 store employee's as he still worked as a woman's shoe salesman, which he'll never hear the end of from just about everyone.
So while he's remained in the same town, working the same job for more than 10 years, a lot has changed as mentioned since Aqua decided on a whim to be a full town house wife, which was an excuse of her living like a NEET who blows his money, while raising their son Naofumi and their daughter Naruto.
There son was now ten years old, with short shaggy black hair and green eyes, his favorite super hero is Captain America, he sleeps with a stuffed Tanuki, and his circle of frenemies are a bunch of assholes and dumbasses with that girl he hangs with playing a me-too victim whenever the opportunity arises to torment his son, just so she can get him to do whatever she wants.
His daughter was 7 years old, and if it wasn't for the for the sole braid she had, she was a total tomboy, from wearing her brothers old hand-me-down clothes, going out and playing rough with her boy friends, getting into fights against the grade bully, she was actually born with blue hair and eyes like her mother, but she consciously chose to dye her hair blonde, because one she claims to look cuter with blonde hair and secondly doesn't want to be associated with a couch potato, she sleeps with a stuffed fox, and is obsessed with ninja's.
And it was because he had these group of oddballs living in his life does Kazuma dread living his life everyday.
Coming home from work, we see him wearing a green button up shirt and some brown business pants, his hair was cut short and he had some bags under his eyes.
Upon reaching the door, Kazuma began to stuff his money inside his socks since no one dared to go near his feet as it smelled terribly.
"Hey Satou, my wife is cooking me dinner tonight" heckled one of his neighbors much to Kazuma's annoyance.
"Hey Satou, I'm eating hamburger steaks tonight, what about you" heckled a different neighbor.
"If I was the mailman, I'd be having your wife" shouted Kazuma as he came inside his house at long last to see who else napping on the couch next to an empty pizza box but his wife.
Wearing her hair down and yet in very big classic 50's style, while wearing cheetah print leggings, blue heels, a cheetah print top over a thin black sweater as a means to be provocative for her husband who has long since lost interest in her in a lustful manner, Aqua finally woke up when the alarm on her phone went off.
"Oh god, I gotta hurry and clean before that idiot gets home" yawned Aqua as she realized that Kazuma was looming over her.
"Oh, hey Kazuma" said Aqua innocently, "Hey Aqua, can you at least call me Mr. Idiot when inside my own house" Kazuma said dryly as he finally sat next to his wife at long last.
"So how was you day honey" asked Aqua, "Well funny how you should ask, a fat woman comes into the shoe store today, wanting to return some heels she bought the other day, because they split amidst her club sandwiched feet, where I explained to her that like an elevator there's a 2 ton weight limit" began Kazuma as he went and grabbed himself a beer from the fridge.
"So she tells me that I'd be hearing from her attorney, and so jokingly I ask her if it'll be from the law offices of Baskin and Robin's" said Kazuma as he popped the top off and made his way towards Aqua.
"That's sounds like you had a very stressful day honey" said Aqua sympathetically, "Yes, it actually was, and thank you for caring for once" said Kazuma.
"You know, there's a sure fire way to relieve all that stress in one night, that only you and I can do together honey" cooed Aqua as she began to rub her index finger on her husbands nipple to his discomfort.
"Sex again" Kazuma asked dryly as Aqua gave him a longing amorous look that every house wife has after x amount of time since they've last had sex.
"Aqua, didn't we had sex just last month" said Kazuma, "Yes, but remember we didn't finish, so I figured we pick up where we left off" said Aqua as she mounted on her husband ready to do it on the couch, much to Kazuma's disdain.
Luckily their kids happen to come in from the backyard, with Naofumi carrying his foam shield and nerf gun in his hands and Naruto carrying her nerf sword and crossbow in her hands.
"Oh great, it's moms birthday, come on, let's hurry back to my room and stay there for the next 2 minutes" said Naofumi.
"Kids wait! Don't you know not to leave me alone with your mother!" yelled Kazuma as he was begging for his kids to save his thirsty AF wife.
"We could, but we need a little incentive to help you out daddy" said Naruto, "Yeah, in fact I think we're overdo for our allowance from these last 2 weeks" said Naofumi.
Feeling betrayed that his family have now banded together in taking away his money, that he worked hard for to buy his own beer, premium porn streaming services, and videogame money, Kazuma none the less gave in as this was the lesser of 2 evils before him.
"Oh all right, you win" cried Kazuma as Aqua got off Kazuma as she went to praise her kids as Kazuma began to remove his money from out his socks.
"Good job kids, you've made mommy proud" said Aqua as she kissed Naofumi on the forehead, before he stuck his hands out in front of his dad where begrudgingly handed him a about 7,500 yen.
"Anything to get our fair share" said Naruto as Aqua tousled her hair before sticking her hands in front of her dad, where Kazuma gave her about 5,000 yen.
Sneaking their way into the group was the family pet, which happened to be a rather large red pelt fox that was about the size of a pit bull, whom they called Negi as he leaned his head over Kazuma's shoulder, resulting in him handing the giant feline-canine 1,000 yen for it to eat on the spot.
Seeing everyone getting their share, Aqua made her way next to Kazuma back on the couch, who was more grumpy than he already was as he handed Aqua a 10,000 yen note, which she happily took and hid inside her cleavage before she began to cuddle up to Kazuma.
Yup this is the life of the Satou family in a nutshell, and the best part is that we only just begun.
Ok guys, I know this is a rather short chapter, but I just wanted to introduce some of the new characters that'll joining the cast from here on out, which does involve their 2 kids and pet fox.
Also further disclaimers chapters from here on out may appear more goofy and silly only because that's how later episodes from Married… With Children are, granted I do plan to keep it grounded to the characters we all came to love and respect, which I am more than humbled you guys continued to follow.
As such, this is and this isn't the home stretch since I don't want to drag out the story any longer than it needs to, in fact I was highly debating whether or not to end this fic in the last chapter, but I feel like it wouldn't be doing the source material justice.
Chin up though, I don't plan to end this in like 3 chapters or nothing like that, I say more like another 10-12 chapters at most.
So until next time, be safe, be good people, and please support you locan fandom communities.
This has been your Humble Narrator and official author Tobi Yaza. =3