I've been terribly ill for the past three months, and writing was out of the question due to the exhaustion that I was feeling. I am better now and with so much desire to continue writing. That allowed me to write a new chap for the Spanish version and motivation to continue to translate the rest of chapters.
I hope this period continues for long.
I apologize in advance as I'm not very good at writing fights...
"We aren't children anymore pt. 3"
March, 1865
That day the sky was full of clouds, the air was cold. Although it was early in the morning, there were any traces of the sun in that cloudy landscape. Tomoe thought that it would be a good day to die.
She had gotten up early according to what was stipulated for that day's event. Together with the rest of the members of the Kiyosato clan, she navigated the house taking care of and organizing the kitchen chores, the seats to arrange for the guests they would have and last, dressing her husband for the meeting that would take place in the dry garden.
As she fastened the protections of Akira's armor one by one, Tomoe felt that she was reliving the chapters of another life when she still dwelt in her father's house, and his mother was still alive. Tomoe was samurai, that hadn't changed. But her obligations had been reduced when she entered her aunt's family, and after her marriage, they had increased. She would have wished that she could prevent her husband from being part of the conflict that was taking place. However, she understood her duty as his wife and that it was expected of her.
Tomoe was a samurai.
"Anata(darling), you shouldn't worry, Tomoe."
Akira's hands held hers gently but firmly. Protecting her with such gesture from the despair that had begun to take over her. She hadn't even realized how she felt until he had stopped her from adjusting the straps on his right side. Akira looked at her understandingly.
So she forced herself to calm down.
She was samurai, she told herself.
"Why the armor then?" she questioned, her voice steady despite the agitation she felt.
He finished adjusting the last strap; the one she had given up trying to tie.
"Precisely to avoid an accident." He answered. Then he looked at her again with those calm eyes. He reached up a hand and caressed her face. "It's okay. With you by my side, I know everything will be fine."
They had just returned the day before, fulfilling the time they had to stay in Edo, that city that had turned into hell at night. She had been glad to be back, to be away from that minefield. However, with everything that was about to happen, she couldn't help but wonder if she hadn't left one battlefield for another.
"Be careful, anata (darling)." She requested. Aware that her duty forces her to be strong and support him in any crusade that he decided to make his own.
One of the servants then informed them of the arrival of Kondo Isami and two of his captains. With a heavy heart, Tomoe followed her husband to the dry garden, where the seats had already been arranged, and the guests were chatting with the new clan leader, Kiyosato Shinji.
It was hard to believe that he was barely fifteen years old. The last time she had seen him had been half a year ago, when he had finished his assignment with Inari's priestess -Kaoru dono- and even then, the change in the boy's behavior was noticeable; who had not only demonstrated maturity, but leadership skills. But at the same time that she admired him, it was also true that she had begun to grow suspicious after said boy had begun to treat Enishi as one of his men.
"Sister!"
The black-haired woman was startled to discover her younger brother coming down the adjoining corridor in the company of two servants, one of them a samurai in charge of his protection. Akira had already gone to Shinji, so the woman could not question him (but rather demand) the presence of the minor in that meeting.
"Enishi!" She exclaimed, receiving the young man holding his hands since a hug was not proper. "When did you ariive?"
"Early in the morning. I couldn't miss my brother's meeting for anything." He answered with his sly smile, which had become a habit in him.
Tomoe knew that her brother had started to feed his ego after the start of his training eight months ago. Then the minor noticed his sister's tension but could not interpret her annoyance.
"You're not afraid, are you?"
No, she told herself. What she felt was annoyance. But a wife, least of all one who is samurai, must not show her emotions. She had to remain calm and give an appropriate response. Except that words eluded her.
Fortunately for her, the clan patriarch arrived in that moment to save her.
"It's normal for your sister to be worried," he said when he was present at the engawa, "her nature as a woman makes her much more sensitive."
"Honorable father." Both adoptive brothers greeted with due reverence.
This was the man who had made her marriage to Akira possible and the same man who had consented to receive not only Tomoe into his family but also Enishi, giving him the clan name. The young woman had great esteem for him since he had been someone who had been gentle. It was easy to forget that, decades ago, he had been a fierce samurai. A general who brought death with him.
"Don't worry," he told her, taking her hand in his own and looking at her affectionately. "Shinji has an agreement with Kondo san; he won't dare do any real harm to him."
Her heart pounded in relief, and she nodded in response. The three then prepared to take seats in the designated places. Enishi was the first to discover the identities of the two captains accompanying Kondo Isami, the general of the Shinsengumi.
"Those are…Saito Hajime and Okita Souji." He exclaimed smiling. "Incredible! They are going to give a great honor to Akira onisan. Isn't that fantastic, onesan?"
'I don't like it.' thought the young woman but said nothing.
Both captains were smiling, though it was hard to take the gesture as sincere. The two agreed to remain standing even as their general took a seat. Shinji had already advanced towards Akira.
"You only need to land one blow," he told him, handing him the sword he would use, "or stay on your feet for at least three minutes."
Akira stifled a laugh.
"Something tells me that the latter will be easier." He stated.
There was a glimmer of determination in his gaze that prevented Shinji from refuting anything.
'It's for the best,' he said to himself. "Better be prepared to receive anything, even death."
Shinji returned to his place next to his father on the platform prepared for that day's meeting, the same from where they could watch the battle without losing any detail of it. Saito made one last comment to Soji and walked up to the platform with his general, remaining standing.
Kondo surveyed the scene in front of him. Then, a comment was allowed towards the former general Kiyosato, who remained seated to the right of his eldest son.
"It is good to see that you are in good health." He said.
Shinji's face tightened, more than aware of the hint in the shinsengumi leader's words. He hadn't been the only one to question his father's retirement at an age when he was considered still able to fight. He forced himself not to answer and to keep his gaze straight ahead; Tomoe was doing the same, he realized.
"Undoubtedly a blessing from the gods," replied the ex-general, who, contrary to his son, had managed to remain calm, with no apparent reaction to provocation, "although in my case, being healthy does not mean maintaining strength, unfortunately."
Okita jumped upon hearing this.
"I'm sure you miss the battle," he said, "it must be boring to stay indoors without doing anything for so long."
It was Saito who scolded him.
"Okita, don't be reckless" He asked, still smiling "We can't ask what a noble ex-samurai does behind the doors of his house. It is not proper."
Silence.
What could they answer? Tomoe lamented again. She knew that of the pro-tokugawa clans, Kiyosato was the only one who had been doubted about his loyalty to the shogun. For now they could only bear the insults.
"I'm sorry, Saito-san," Okita replied, and for a moment his expression seemed sincere, "I'm still a boy after all." He then turned to the former clan leader. "I apologize, general."
The aforementioned dismissed it with a wave of his hand; getting the attention to return to the meeting.
Both men -Okita and Akira- adopted their respective positions, one attacking and the other defending, as befitted someone who aspired to be a bodyguard.
Tomoe's heart was beating slowly, while its beating became more present until she felt it rumble in her ears.
"Please may my prayers find you… Kaoru dono" she begged.
Then the duel began.
…
Okita seemed to take just one step forward and then move like lightning. He had actually jumped, then turned to his right and executed a diagonal attack to his opponent's right side. Akira was barely able to perceive the boy's movements to dodge him at the last second.
Metal collided with metal. The scabbards slipped and Okita was walking away again; a jump back and back into combat. A straight thrust that could well have split his enemy's face in two if he had not used the momentum of the previous blow to duck and spin on the ground, running to attack him from behind. The shinsengumi captain jumped up before Akira managed to hit him; managing to land for a second on his opponent's blade and then jump back to the ground.
Immediately afterwards, he assumed a bato position. And he waited.
Tomoe felt that the air had become heavy and dense; it was hard for her to breathe. She was able to feel the same shot of adrenaline that her husband felt then. Behind the protective mask, Akira was sweating, while breathing through his mouth. No. Panting would be more correct. His sword held steady in front of him, held in both hands.
How long had it been? He doubted he could land a punch, but if he managed to stay on his feet just long enough… "No." He told himself. "No." He repeated. "I still have one technique left," he convinced himself. And at his core he felt his determination give him strength. He had to analyze his opponent, figure out the best way he could disarm him, or at least defend himself against his attacks.
Okita was thin and short, the opposite of his own psyche, Akira thought. He had to take advantage of the freedom with which he moved in his favor.
He took a deep breath and faced him.
Okita got ready. Akira ran towards him ready to attack him head on, the captain smiled -as did his companions-; Shinji frowned. Okita's sword was drawn with a quick movement, but suddenly Akira was no longer in front of him; he was surprised. It had been a feint.
The brunet had skidded a step away, turning his body as soon as he passed his opponent, straightening up enough to strike the hilt of his katana directly at the brunet's forearm. He tightened the gesture in pain, but resisted to respond with the hand that held the hilt and hit him with it. Akira fell to the ground.
Ignoring the throbbing pain in his arm—which had subsided to a tingling sensation—Okita swung his sword and prepared to strike again, sword raised to the sky. Akira had barely managed to get back on his feet.
Tomoe closed her eyes.
…
Kondo Isami's voice reverberated throughout the courtyard.
"Enough!" He ordered.
Okita stopped on the spot. But his eyes still had a deranged shine.
"Uhh?" He exclaimed reproachfully, like a child who doesn't understand the words of an adult. "Datte (but)… we just started to warm up."
Saito -whose smile was more tense- answered him.
"Okita, look at your left hand."
The boy did as his partner indicated and was surprised with the fine cut at the height of the wrist; said wound was bleeding.
"Eeehh!" he exclaimed with admiration. "I didn't even notice."
Both the general of the shinsengumi and the leader of the Kiyosato clan had already stood up and were each advancing towards their respective samurai. Tomoe, who had reopened her eyes after Kondo's order, had not been able to look up from her lap, where her hands -clinging to each other- were still trembling.
"As a bodyguard it will certainly come in handy." She heard the general say. "I hope I can count on your support in two nights."
Akira, who had already stood up with Shinji's help, and undone the protection mask; bowed to the waist.
"It will be an honor." He answered.
The general agreed.
"I didn't know you were trained in judo." He said.
The dark-haired man kindly remained calm, without reacting to the obvious trap.
"I'm not." He answered, to the surprise of those present. "The movement is part of a defense technique that I studied during my stay in Edo. The master of such a dojo focuses on teaching defense techniques."
Tomoe finally looked at him with genuine surprise and perhaps a trace of concern. She knew, of course, who Akira was referring to.
"Very appropriate for a future bodyguard." Saito contributed. His smile was light again.
Tomoe then took the opportunity to interrupt, standing up, suddenly remembering what was her duty.
"It will be an honor if you join us for breakfast." She told them, with due reverence.
"We still have time." Okita said, he had already sheathed his sword. "The ceremony was arranged for after noon."
Kondo nodded.
"Let's go then."
The young woman gave a signal to the servants waiting on the engawa; they moved as soon as they received the signal. The group began to advance. Tomoe wanted to hug Akira and let go of the fear she had felt, but there would be time later, she convinced herself.
Then Enishi jumped up behind her.
"I wish I could be a part of the shinsengumi!" He exclaimed.
Tomoe was shocked.
"Enishi!" She caught his attention, partly because his words weren't polite and partly because she didn't want that wish to be fulfilled, especially in such presences.
To her bad luck, Saito Hajime had heard the minor. He was still smiling when he spoke to the boy, but his eyes remained fixed on her.
"Perhaps you will be," he said, "in the very, very near future."
Even if Enishi jumped with happiness then, Tomoe could only feel the cold of fear seeping into her bones.
…
By the time breakfast was over and the food trays replaced by tea trays, the sun had finally broken into the sky. His glow was dull, however, as if it were much more distant than usual. Tomoe thought that this little gift was rather cruel.
Akira had been dispatched to change his clothes and clean his body. While she had to stay until the cups were served and her presence was no longer required. She did not wish to leave Enishi in such company, but after weighing her options, she decided it was more important to find out her husband's intentions.
When she got to the room, the shoji was half open, and her husband was finishing tying the obi of a thin black yukata. Unable to avoid it, she admired the figure of the man she loved before ready herself to face him. He had grown in muscle, and his movements had become much more fluid and accurate, as if he refused to make unnecessary movements.
"Are you going to tell him?" She blurted out, straight to the point. Akira stood still when he heard her; until that moment, he hadn't felt her. "He's going to ask. You know."
How to explain what Akira felt at that moment? On the one hand, he despised himself for having to follow political deceptions; on the other, he understood that honor dictated him, and he was unintentionally irritated by his wife's concerns.
"He has spies, Tomoe." He responded with a dry tone, still with his back to her.
The woman did not flinch.
"And yet, there are secrets that are not to be told."
"It is necessary."
"She doesn't know it herself." She cut him off, raising her voice an octave.
There was a short silence.
A silence which highlighted the line that had begun to be painted between them. It was still diffuse and uncertain, but it was there, shown in the tension of their bodies... in the suspicion breathed in the air between them.
Finally he sighed.
"Which is why I won't tell her." He stated.
Tomoe felt anger pierce through her chest like lightning.
"It's Kaoru-dono!" She demanded, now unable not to scream. "The same young lady you developed feelings for." She reminded him, her body trembled in despair, and something else...
Jealousy.
Akira turned towards her and, with a quick movement, grabbed her by the shoulders.
"Tomoe!" She refused to look at him. "I chose you." His voice was tense and anguished. "Even now. You should never doubt it."
The woman bit her bottom lip, forcing herself not to cry. She was samurai. Forcing herself to remain somewhat serene. She was samurai. Concentrating on not losing the objective of that confrontation. She was a samurai!
"I know. I'm your wife." She finally answered, with difficulty. "And therefore, I know this will hurt you as much as it will hurt her."
She felt small. To some extent defeated. …But she had to insist. She owed a debt to the blue-eyed priestess. The sweet girl who had not only saved the lives of her aunt and nephew; but also that of her now husband and that of herself. The young lady who had taught her to be strong on more than one occasion had motivated her to resist.
It was because of this that her husband's next words broke her heart.
"I have a duty to fulfill."
"Akira!" She finally looked at him. Her hands flew to his face. His eyes shed tears. "If you tell this truth about her… You'll kill her…"
Tomoe knew it would be like that. Akira knew it would be like this. The secret he had discovered after his stay in Edo could perhaps be the key to ensure the prosperity of the clan. However, a secret that was a trap and also a betrayal. "She doesn't know…!" She sobbed.
Akira sighed heavily and evidently sad. His wife believed that she had managed to convince him. He looked at her with pity, took both her hands in his own, and kissed her eyes and then her lips. But when he had withdrawn her hands from his face, his eyes had taken a stern look.
"Either I give her up… or I lose you."
"Ah!"
Without being able to say anything else that would not end up taking what little strength he had left, Akira let go of Tomoe and left the room in the direction of the tea room, where the guests were still.
Tomoe put her hands to her chest. That was the first time that the tanto felt heavy hidden among her clothes.
"You are samurai," the voice in her head repeated.
"You know what to do."
"It seems that the rain will continue for a while longer."
Kaoru stick her head out from under the roof covering the entrance to the inn they were at. A couple of hours ago, the rain had settled heavily on the road and only increased until it forced the travelers to seek shelter. They were quite close to reaching one of the prefectures on the eastern border of Kyoto, the last point where the master of the Hiten Mitsurugi had a scheduled meeting; which was why she and Kenshin were left alone for now. The latter looked at her smiling, resting at one of the tables near the entrance; enjoying a cup of jasmine tea in his hands.
"Will you have a problem if you are delayed one more day?" He asked.
"I honestly don't know." She answered, still inhaling the scent of the rain. The roads smelled of wet earth and white plum blossoms. For an instant she wanted to go out dancing and get wet in the rain. She decided it was better to go back inside. "I want to believe that the government ceremony will obscure my return enough for them to forget about me, at least for a while longer."
He shook his head, almost mockingly.
"Then we are doomed." He stated.
"Kenshin!" She refuted, with flushed cheeks and pulling a lock of her partner's hair. He barely complained. "I'm not that special."
"Yes you are. -He refuted -I thought we had already covered that part the night before."
The red color of her cheeks intensified.
"We did. But again, you have to remember that not everyone loves me like you do. They see me as a symbol, not a person."
-Are you still happy?- He would have wanted to ask her, the question forming rapidly in his mind; luckily he had developed a better command over the past two days with her and had managed to retain his words. However, that did not mean that the doubt vanished. It was constantly at the forefront of his mind. He wanted to know, despite being aware of the absurdity, he hoped that if she said no, he would still have the right to run with her.
Kaoru finally sat down at the table with him, returning to attend to the bag with her belongings, which she had left on the table. She took out the gift Sanosuke had given her and began to unwrap the cloth. That piqued Kenshin's interest.
"What did he give you?" He asked.
She revealed the treasure. A wooden box with different, colorful and small handmade figures, each one on a rice paper.
"Tea cakes." She said with delight. Then she noticed that her partner's mouth had watered. "It seems more like a gift for you, Kenshin."
"Oro?… I couldn't." He said something embarrassed.
"Nonsense, there are enough for both. We can even save a pair for Hiko san."
He frowned.
"He doesn't like sweets very much."
She almost laughs.
"Either way, we will save two for him."
"Okay, but they will be the ones left."
Kenshin filled Kaoru's cup, and she took charge of distributing the cakes; she hadn't forgotten what her friend's favorites were, and she served them before he could refuse again.
The rain continued to fall.
"Do you think it will take him a long time?" Kaoru questioned suddenly.
The truth was that Hiko hadn't left for a long time; there was no real reason for concern in his partner's voice, but rather a touch of insecurity that didn't go unnoticed by the samurai.
"I couldn't say. -He answered. -There is no specific margin; certain missions last longer than others. There have been times when he didn't come back until the next day. But I doubt that is the case."
"Hmm…"
Kaoru weighed her options, lost in thought. She looked anxious, Kenshin decided. Suddenly, she stood up smiling, with her usual optimism back on her face.
"Well, maybe we can- Ah!"
It was less than a second.
Of that Kaoru could be sure.
She was barely about to take a step when Kenshin had pulled her towards him, holding her by the shoulders; he turned her around until they switched positions. If anything, she had blinked twice, before hearing the sound of splashing water and the thud of a wooden bucket on the floor.
And for a brief moment—among all that hustle and bustle—Kaoru breathed in the scent of wood and pine, soap, and a tinge of sweat. For the briefest moment of a breath, the blue-eyed priestess was aware of her companion's presence and the intimacy of their closeness.
An instant in which her heart skipped a beat.
"Kenshin…" she whispered.
"I'm sorry!" A female voice was heard, somewhat weak and perhaps even sweet, cracking the fragile bubble of that moment in time.
Kaoru was finally able to take in the scene around her. The water had splashed and wet the bench and the edge of the table. Luckily the cakes were safe. Although Kenshin's hakama was wet from the bottom edge.
"Don't worry, everything is fine." Replied the samurai.
No doubt he was smiling, Kaoru told herself, and then realizing that he was still holding her, she looked up to find him staring at her, waiting for an answer.
"Hai (yes) -she said somewhat stunned -we're fine, nothing bad happened." She assured, turning to look at her, and after finding the poor appearance of the young woman still on the ground, she was alarmed. "Kami…! You should sit down!"
Kaoru rushed to help the girl who had obviously tripped; Kenshin let her go, deciding to pick up the bucket instead. The few customers in the restaurant barely looked at the accident for a couple of moments before returning to their business.
The young woman was dark-skinned and black-haired, with dark chocolate eyes and a heart-shaped face. She was cute but she looked exhausted, like she'd been in a convalescent bed for months, and maybe she had. The miko helped her sit down at the table where she and Kenshin were; the latter noticed the tension in his friend's body and sensed what it was due to.
"I'm so sorry."
"Don't apologize, everything is fine. You weren't hurt?" He questioned, already reviewing it.
"I'm fine…" She said, but it was noticeable that she had a hard time answering.
Just then, a commotion was heard in the corridors to the left -those that led to the interior of the inn-, and then a young woman came out, maybe in her early thirties, running up to them.
"Kana! O Kami!" Sh exclaimed when she saw her, she knelt in front of the young woman. "Kana, I told you that you should stay in bed."
"But I have to prepare the water for the bath, Tsukasa san."
"I already told you that I'll take care of bathing Ya-chan. You just have to rest." Tsukasa refuted firmly. Then she stood up and looked at the teens. "I'm sorry, we will pay for your service."
"There's no need!" They both answered at the same time.
"I insist," she said forcefully, and the teens could only nod.
Then Kaoru shyly approached Kana.
"Ano… You just gave birth, right?"
She looked at her surprised.
"Can you tell?"
Tsukasa answered before Kaoru did.
"How can a person not be noticed with such carelessness!" She claimed, taking her in her arms afterwards; Kana held on to her. "Let's go back inside. Thanks for your understanding."
The two women headed towards the corridor, where another girl was waiting with a baby in her arms. Although the blue blanket that covered him did not allow anything to be seen beyond the infant's black hair.
Kenshin and Kaoru watched them leave until they said goodbye with a final bow, which they responded the same way. Then they sat down again.
"How did you know she had a baby?" Kenshin asked, when he couldn't contain his curiosity any longer.
"I touched the thread of life of her little one." She answered. He knew what she meant of course; over a year ago-during their first game-she had explained it to him. No doubt the connection had been made as soon as she'd helped her up. "Her father is a fierce Edo samurai, at least that impression it gave me."
He nodded.
He had a weight on his chest.
"Has it gotten stronger?"
"What?"
"The ease with which you connect with that other plane."
She considered it.
"It's the same. I'm just better trained. More in tune." She commented lightly, not wanting to delve into the details that involved the visions. "Like swordsmanship. My senses sharpen, and I become one with my weapon."
"Did you keep learning your brother's style?"
Kaoru smiled.
"I saw him in Edo after the presentation to the imperial court. But my new obligations no longer allow me to be your sister."
There were overtones of sadness evident not only in her words but also in her eyes.
"Sorry. It was reckless of me."
She brushed it off, smiling again.
"The truth is that he sent me a book of techniques, secretly, of course." She hastily added the last. "Would you mind helping me learn them?"
Kenshin blinked in surprise.
Instantly after, a smile spread on his lips to illuminate his entire face.
It was noon when Hikari managed to reach the Inari Private Shrine, the one on the outskirts of the Fushimi-ku district in Kyoto, within the myrtle Mount Inari. The young chokkai felt that she had been playing someone else's role for an eternity and had barely managed to get rid of the designated escort for the Kyoto seer -which was certainly not her-. She could only thank that for the moment she was saved from being discovered. It only remained to wait for Kaoru.
Entering the main compound, she shed her veil and moved forward looking for her next accomplice.
"Sasaki-san?" She called.
But it was another who received her.
"I should have assumed that Kaoru dono would do something like that."
"Sato!"
Her partner—who had just risen to the rank of Maekkai—was looking at her reproachfully near the atrium. Her partner, Sasaki, was standing behind him a few steps away with a guilty expression.
"He received the letter before I did." Sasaki said, by way of explanation.
Hearing that, Hikari couldn't help but let out a groan of irritation and frustration.
"How long have you been interpreting it?" Sato questioned his partner.
The girl looked away, cheeks puffed out.
"Since before leaving Owari."
"Hikari!" He refuted, scandalized.
"There was no choice! -Hikari counterattacked -Kaoru dono had to complete an errand from heaven."
He looked at her with the emotion of anger cut off.
"A vision?"
"With the Kihetai."
"Kamisama!" He exclaimed again, even more discouraged, and raising a hand to his face to later pass it through his hair in a clear gesture of frustration.
"You can't say anything." Sasaki hastened to ask; Hikari nodded with her. "We just have to wait until Akira san catches up with us."
"When will that be?"
"In one more day."
"Counting from today?"
Silence.
The two girls looked at each other with doubt and complicity. The truth was that none of them was sure, and it had been a day since they had received a letter from their friend. In the end Hikari was the one who answered, looking at him with intent.
"You know it will be better this way."
"Himura is with her." He concluded.
"Can you really blame her?"
After everything that had happened the previous year, the answer was clear.
"No, I guess not." He answered in a breath, almost as if he were deflating. "Still, there are many things at stake. If they discover her with Himura-"
"It will not happen." They cut both at the same time, and with some annoyance.
"How can you be so sure?"
"We can only ensure the preparations for her reception." Sasaki pointed out. "I'm sure Shinji san will know what to do about Himura san."
Hikari nodded.
"Besides, we're not in a position to question her. She has a position greater than us and the future behind her."
Sato grunted, then gave up.
"I understand… This better work. I don't want to have to face Kenshin if he has to find out all of a sudden." He warned them. "Or worse! Having to deal with the clergy, shinsengumi, and nobility discovering her absence."
"Then let's give Kaoru sama as much time as possible."
The three of them froze in place.
The new presence moved out of the shadows where it had been taking refuge. His firm footsteps made a strong echo in the room, as if they were heavy on their own but they knew that it was his ki that controlled the environment of the room and kept them imprisoned and still in his presence.
"Captain Saito Hajime!" Sasaki exclaimed, her face white with shock.
"How?" They questioned all three. "How is he here?"
"Why would you help her?" Sato managed to question, internally surprised he had been able to speak at that moment without hesitating and without his voice shaking.
The captain gave his classic lopsided smile.
"I still owe her a debt." He told them in a way that seemed to share a confidence. "Besides, she hasn't done anything yet to put her in the path of my sword."
"Why should we believe you?" Hikari questioned.
Sato cursed internally, and Sasaki wailed. Hikari was still reckless, but contrary to what they thought, Saito finally looked at her with a hint of fascination in his eyes.
"Who says you have to?" He answered easily. "The way I see it, either you accept my help or stand aside to let me do my job."
Aphonia.
The three looked at him tensely.
"So? -He asked again smiling -What's it going to be?"
The rain had stopped in the early afternoon about half an hour ago. But Kenshin and Kaoru were too busy to notice the change in the scenery outside.
After that proposal from the miko, both had asked to use a private room inside the inn to practice katas. The owner of the inn - aware of their help to Kana and Tsukasa's promise - had agreed to lend them the area free of charge for a couple of hours. The man led them through the house to the large room whose space could rival a dojo. When the man left, the youngsters were still absorbed in admiring their temporary playground - each one meters away from the other - then, when their eager gazes had stopped looking in all directions, they locked gazes with their companion's and smiled widely.
Between laughs and whispers, Kenshin agreed to lend the wakizashi to Kaoru -without releasing the lock- so that she could show him the katas; this because the weight was different from the swords that the miko used, and the shape of the blade would also be more comfortable for her.
The sun had just begun to rise when Kaoru executed the last twist of the final kata her brother Koishijiro had taught her. Kenshin didn't miss a thing.
"Although your movements are more fluid, your posture has been hindered." He concluded with a thoughtful air.
Kaoru deflated as soon as she heard him, dropping her arms.
"I knew it. So much dancing made my arms weak." She complained dramatically; she let herself fall to the floor.
Kenshin smiled while approaching her; he had a scroll in his hands, which he had begun to analyze carefully.
"I can understand how the course of these katas works. However, the main thing as I understand, it is to strengthen your body.
"So I'll have to spend hours and hours doing strokes."
"Are you disappointed?" He questioned with true curiosity.
"Ma… I expected it." She complained without much emotion. Then she reflected. "After all, it is not perfected yet."
"Come, let me help you."
Surprised at the approach of her companion, she allowed herself to be lifted by his hands, standing up completely. Kenshin looked at the scroll one more time then set it down on the ground two steps in front of him. Finally, he turned to her Kaoru looked at him curiously.
"After the first two shots, you tend to lean forward and your back hunches, not much but significant." He explained, going through the motions himself. Kaoru imitated him, ending up just in the pose he said. "Right there," he pointed out, forcing her to stay still in the stance.
Kenshin approached her, and to the latter's surprise, he positioned himself behind her and leaned to the left, almost hugging her. With his hands he began to correct her posture.
"Try to keep your belly as the axis," he indicated, bringing his left hand to her belly, where he pressed carefully but with enough force for her to respond as he indicated.
Without being able to explain herself, the priestess's body was filled with heat, and her skin tingled where his hands slid, projecting a cold halo that contrasted with the heat she suddenly felt.
"This to force your lower back to remain straight." He continued saying, while his right hand slid from the shoulder blades to reach the base of the spine. "Like this."
Suddenly it was hard for her to breathe.
"Now raise your arms to execute the backward step before attacking again," he indicated, gently raising her arms, his left hand moving from her belly to her shoulder and up the curve of her arm to where her hands held the blade, and he lifted them up.
Wood and pine, wet earth and a touch of sweat.
Kaoru let out a groan. Short. Tiny. And it was all anguish.
Just hearing it, Kenshin finally realized the predicament he had put them both in.
"Oh!" He exclaimed, moving away instantly. "I'm sorry! It was inappropriate of me." His face was red, but contrary to the time of the river, he did not feel the same anguish as then.
"No! -She hastened to say, flushed and nervous. -Don't be ridiculous, it's normal for you to touch me as my teacher, even if it's temporary and unofficial, nee?"
It took him a blink to understand.
"R-right." He agreed. "It's just formality."
Hiko was right, Kaoru thought in the brief awkward silence that enveloped them. The two of them were a couple of idiots.
-You're good for him.-
Although it had not been all that the teacher had said, she was reminded.
"Then I'll try…" she inquired, with her current optimism and fragile hope.
The samurai smiled, equally relieved.
"Yes, it would be the most convenient."
The priestess took a deep breath and concentrated with her eyes closed before re-executing the kata.
This time her movements didn't flow as easily but the posture was correct.
"Better?" She asked once she finished.
The redhead had to swallow before answering.
"Better." He said. He had a dry mouth and an intense desire to find out once and for all what it felt like to kiss her. He shook off those thoughts. "I must say that your brother is a true genius. -He said instead, averting his gaze. -Although it is not perfected, he has managed to develop a complex style."
"The truth is that it is not yet complete." She confessed, sitting back on the tatami. "In my brother's last letter, he mentioned that he was still trying to develop what will be the two secret techniques."
"Sounds complicated."
"It is. Much more than learning them; believe me." She nodded.
Then she invited him to sit next to her. He agreed. She then lowered her voice denoting that the next thing she would say would be important and private.
"But it made me happy that he could open his own dojo and that he also has many students, considering the philosophy of the style."
"The sword that protects life." Kenshin reminded himself. His teacher had laughed the first time he had told him about Kaoru's brother's school. To be honest, he also had his doubts.
And yet...
"Perhaps, once the war ends." He suggested.
She nodded, suddenly entranced by the features of his face. His eyes were two fine gems with violet tints. She suddenly inhaled the same aroma now as moments before.
"Maybe." She said, suddenly feeling her mouth dry. "Although for it to finish first, it has to start, and it still scares me."
Kenshin took her hand, forcing her to look at him again.
"We'll be fine," he promised.
She nodded again before looking away; her eyes suddenly found the landscape behind the gates of the fusuma, towards the central garden.
"Oh look. It stopped raining."
…
They managed to pay for a private bath in the inn's natural onsen once they finished their training time. There was a second building, smaller than the inn, behind it. A small house with only four rooms. The first was the reception, after which was the second largest that was the workers' area. The other two were to the right of the first and were the two bathing areas that were connected to a small natural hot spring.
On that occasion, it had been Kaoru who had paid for the access, claiming it had been her idea that had put them in need of one. Kenshin would have wanted to refuse if it weren't because he didn't have enough to pay for both without running out of money. Besides, it was a gift, she had said, and he forced himself not to feel ashamed of his circumstances.
The two went to their respective living room, still smiling. The bath rooms despite being small, were well ventilated with windows in its high wooden walls. There were only four seats in each room, with their respective towels, buckets, and lye soap.
The innkeeper had told them that at this point in the road it was rare for someone to pay for a private bath when the public baths were in the center of the prefecture, so they could expect to be the only ones that day and even more so at that time.
Kenshin and Kaoru were grateful for that small blessing. They finished their bath almost at the same time; and they headed towards the onsen in sync, with the towels placed where they belonged -Kenshin's around his waist and Kaoru's all over the midsection of her body-. Both had tied their hair up to avoid getting it wet again. Facing the shoji, they opened the door to the natural hot spring.
…
Without suspecting it was a mixed bath...
…
They blinked.
In front of both stretched the spring, surrounded by limestone and decorated with vegetation all around.
And no bamboo partition wall.
"Oro?/uh?" they both exclaimed, finally realizing that the sound of the sliding wood had been heard twice. Wait. "No dividing wall?"
And even more so, noticing the uncovered water area in front.
Kenshin swallowed hard, and Kaoru felt a chill run down her spine. Slowly—still in sync in some strange way—they poked their heads in toward each other, one to the left, the other to the right.
Blue met Amethyst.
A heartbeat.
Two beats.
Shame that rises until it comes out like smoke from the ears...
Panic later.
"Aaahh!"
Not knowing who had yelled first and who had yelled longer, the two of them went back into their respective bathrooms, closing the shoji behind them tightly.
At last his movements lost their previous synchronization. Kaoru had ended up with her face in her hands, feeling her ears warm and her heart pounding fast in her chest. Kenshin's face was a tomato red color, one hand resting on his chest at the level of his heart, hunched over but still standing against the shoji.
"He saw me!/She saw me!" They both thought with shame. So worried about what they thought they had let see, without even noticing the appearance of the other. Although the latter was registered an instant later.
Heat smoked out of their ears again.
"I saw him" / "I saw her," each one thought. This time, the redhead did need to cover his face with both hands.
…
The first to recover was Kaoru. As always, berating herself for having reacted so impulsively.
"Why did I yell?" She recriminated herself. "It's not uncommon for onsen to be mixed; in fact it's quite common. Not that I've ever been to one. Well, the time of the retreat, but that was different; we weren't alone, and we were wearing yukatas then, not towels..." She concluded, still embarrassed and looking at the towel she covered herself with.
Then she slapped her face with both hands hard, almost like a scolding; trying to shake off the shame and instill courage.
"Come on Kaoru. This must be normal for Kenshin, and your reaction must have dismayed him, no doubt."
By force of will, she lifted herself off the ground and reopened the shoji. She went out to the onsen.
…
"Now I really messed it up," Kenshin thought for his part. His hands slid over his face until they were linked at the level of his mouth. "Kaoru dono must not be used to this type of bath. And rightly so! She is the daughter of a daimyo, Himura! What did you expect?" He scolded himself irritably. "Even a year ago, it was due to a special situation… Why didn't the innkeeper tell us that the onsen was mixed?" He lamented again, plunging his hands into his hair as he dropped his head forward.
"Kenshin" her companion's voice sounded. He barely listened to her; he tensed up waiting... "Won't you go in?"
"Oro?"
He must have heard wrong, he told himself. There was no way she could be inviting him; although the bathroom was mixed, he didn't need anyone's permission or approval, but still... It was Kaoru! The fact they were not on the same page -he lamented again- did not mean that such liberties could be given.
He then listened to the sound of water, aware that his friend was now inside the onsen.
Gulping again, he turned and opened the shoji.
…
Kaoru had her back to him, submerged up to her neck. It looked obvious that she was curled up.
That involuntarily made him smile.
The water splashed again as he stepped inside, and the young priestess's heart pounded even faster. Kenshin sighed, equally with his back to his partner, chest-deep in water.
Silence spread… the air was electrified.
"If you're not comfortable-"
"We cannot insult our hosts," she interrupted him, less than two meters away from him. "...Besides, it wouldn't be fair for only me to enjoy myself. I paid for both, remember? …It's a gift…"
There was a brief silence after those last words, barely spoken in a whisper.
She was nervous…
And so was he.
Being already so close to Kyoto, practically at the city limits, the samurai pondered that the time he had left to share such closeness with her was about to end. He didn't want that, of course, but it was something out of his hands... So he decided that it wasn't worth wasting the time they had left.
"It's similar to when we shared a bed…" he blurted out with difficulty and trembling in insecurity.
She, who had been startled to hear him, pondered his words for a second.
"Except there's no screen," she murmured equally uncertain and nervous.
"No bedspreads," he supplied.
"No clothes," she said, and the moment she said it she hit herself mentally, covered her face with her hands. "I didn't mean that," she lamented.
"…I know, don't worry."
Kenshin, who had frozen in place, was once again red in the face, almost as red as his hair. He mentally pushed himself to find something else to talk about, something to break the discomfort that was invading them. So racing was his mind, that he did not repair his words until he had said them.
"Will there be someone waiting for you at the entrance to Kyoto?"
And yet, despite his fears, that was the right thing to say.
"Hikari promised to receive me." She answered after standing up again, the water below her shoulders.
"How is she?"
Kaoru smiled.
"She's taller than me."
"Oh really?" He said between surprised and incredulous.
He was able to hear the laughter in her words.
"I know, it's absurd. I think I'll be doomed to be a short person. Which is fine since you're not that tall."
Kenshin gasped, pretending to be offended.
"I'm still taller than you."
"But I'm much younger than you; you'll stop growing before me."
"Three years are not that long."
And just like that, they got involved in meaningless conversations, more and more tempted to turn completely and look straight at each other... Their faces turned until their chins were almost on their shoulders, but their eyes kept looking down.
"You're right. -Kaoru said after talking for a while. -It feels like when we talked with the screen between us."
He smiled.
"Aa."
Kaoru was the first to go out. Not before she had made enough threats to her mate about what would happen if he even glanced in her direction. He swore by his sword that he wouldn't see her; what's more, he even swore to wait a couple of minutes after she left.
And he kept his word.
…
They had no room. So they went back to the inn's restaurant as soon as they got out of the bathroom. Fortunately they both still had a change of clean clothes that would be what they would travel with -if Hiko returned at a prudent hour-. It was still early afternoon, just after five. They could walk and camp on the way if they left hours later. If they left at that moment, maybe they could reach the next prefecture and find an inn...
…
Hiko came back around seven. Kenshin was the first to look at him.
"Shishō!" He said between surprised and worried.
His teacher looked exhausted but pale as if he had been running for miles chased by kamisama knows what. There were few things for which the man could look so pitiful, and none of them were good.
Hiko scanned the place for a second before heading up to Kenshin with long strides, urgency all over him. His pupil jumped to his feet.
"We will leave now and camp in the open." He stated.
"Did something happened?"
"Nothing of importance, just the usual patrolmen." He said with a light gesture, as if minimizing importance, but there was tension in his voice.
"Will it really be safe to go out now?"
"It's either that or face the second batch of the shogun's soldiers." Kenshin swallowed hard. That meant that a larger army had finally arrived to take back what was lost during Mito's rebellion; and that the latter would no doubt come to an end soon. "After the last two defeats it is evident that he is desperate."
"Shouldn't we…?
"Do you really want to stay? -He cut him off irritated, fed up with his disciple's constant questions. -With her here?" He pointed.
Kaoru, weighed down by the exercise and then the bath, was asleep sitting at the table, her face on both arms crossed on the wooden plank.
"I understand. -Kenshin answered, somewhat embarrassed. When his teacher made a move to address his friend, the redhead stopped him. -I'll do it." he asked. He advanced towards his friend and began to shake her delicately. "Kaoru dono… wake up. We must go. Kaoru dono."
The girl despaired. Not very convinced at first. She stretched out on the table like a cat before opening her eyes and seeing her two companions. She jumped when she saw the older man.
"Hiko-san!" She said, and then she hurriedly reached into her bag, took out the box of tea cakes, and held them out to Kenshin's master. "The sweets." She offered.
But the man frowned at her, grunted, then turned to leave.
"Don't waste time," he said.
Kaoru blinked in confusion. "Did I said something wrong?"
"No. It's just that we have to go." Said Kenshin.
Still somewhat sleepy, the priestess nodded and gathered her belongings, putting the box of cakes back. Kenshin did the same, and they left the inn together.
Kioto.
The ceremony arranged to receive the new government members took place at noon as scheduled. The event had been held behind closed doors, but the people of Kyoto were aware of what was happening.
The celebration that took place afterward was likewise only for the aristocrats and the nobles of the clergy. There was an expectation for the arrival of the priestess but, when it became evident that she would not arrive that day in the late afternoon, the activities continued with their current routine.
Within the shogun's ranks, however, there was concern over the miko seer's delay.
"We must post officers on the northeast border," declared one of the new commanding officers named Geisuke, a man in his mid-forties with a receding hairline, "since her arrival will be tomorrow."
The newly posted Guji -who luckily for the Inari sanctuary had come into office thanks to Yumi- tried to intervene on behalf of his protégé; especially given the uncertainty of whether she would truly return at that time.
"We still don't know for sure..."
"What could have delayed her?" Geisuke interrupted him forcefully. "Or is she hiding?"
Silence.
Even with the departure of Yumi and the restructuring of the clergy members, it was difficult to remove the doubts that hung over the sanctuary. These were difficult times, after all, and religion remained neutral.
After no one said anything, not even the Shinsengumi leader, Geisuke intended to continue his plans, smiling for being right. So it was understandable that he choked on his words when the voice of the third division general came through.
"Kaoru miko sama will be performing the day after tomorrow." Saito's strong yet gentle voice spread throughout the room, filling every space. The man advanced slowly but surely, with his classic smile adorning his face, until he reached the front of the assembled group. "Due to the confrontations in the south, her way back was blocked, and considering the casualties, she has determined to pray to her regent kami."
Everyone knew about the advance of the last shogun army sent to Mito, so the explanation was more than commendable.
"Understandable given the circumstances." Okita agreed, smiling towards his partner.
Kondo looked at him with interest.
"Did you check it yourself, Saito?"
"I did it." He nodded. Then his eyes widened, leaving a sharp look. "I even decapitated a couple of snakes on the way here."
The effect was the expected; the politician and company did nothing but shudder.
"I understand." Kondo nodded, then looked at Shinji, who was there fulfilling his role as leader of his clan and servant of the shogun. "Will the Kiyosato clan escort her?"
"The same as the Aizu clan." Shinji answered.
"Then it's settled. -Concluded the leader of the shinsengumi. -Good job, Saito."
The captain nodded with a small bow. Then he gave the captain of the first division a significant look. This one matched him. That night they would begin the search for the enemy within their own ranks.
Only then could he deign to look towards the sanctuary. That, of course, if Tokyo did not have any opposition in this regard.
…
They had been walking for almost two hours. Practically running would be a much better description; until Kaoru, who couldn't stand their fast pace anymore, approached Kenshin when she felt she had little left to fall exhausted.
"Are we running from someone?"
Kenshin felt sorry, wanting to be able to explain the truth to her and at the same time grateful that he didn't have to.
"Not quite."
"We are avoiding unnecessary fights." His teacher cut him off, walking ahead of both of them. He no longer looked as shocked as when he had returned to the inn for them, but that air of concern still linger in his persona. "We aren't long for the point where we will camp." He stopped, much to Kaoru's relief. "Did you buy what I ordered?"
Kenshin nodded since the question had been for him. And he handed over the bag with the indicated goods. Hiko received it and rummaged through the contents until he was satisfied.
"Hai. Double amounts, as indicated."
"It will have to be enough." Considered his teacher and returned to the march. Kenshin and Kaoru -to their regret- followed him.
The last assignment had procured enough money for him not to worry about supplies for two months. But being still far from home, it was not convenient to spend more. Even more so if, as he had been suspecting for weeks, the rebellion broke out that year. He had these and other worries in his head when he suddenly noticed how different the behavior of both children was. Both spoke while walking almost at the same height and with some ease.
It might have been insignificant to someone else, but not to him, so familiar with the way the two teens moved around each other. Something had changed. They were both much more aware of their interactions, especially Kenshin. But the one who gave them away was really Kaoru, suddenly much more confortable around Kenshin. He raised an eyebrow, looking at them significantly.
"Did something happen between you two?"
The question caught them off guard.
"What?" They exclaimed in confusion; then looked at each other and then rushed to respond. "No." They denied with feigned insouciance, their cheeks slightly flushed.
The older man narrowed his gaze.
"You're terribly clean." He observed, amused to see how the two children in front of him became nervous. He decided he should push a little harder. "I see that this time at least, you remembered to take off your clothes before going to bathe."
"Shishō!" Kenshin exclaimed as red as his hair and ready to kick the older man if it hadn't been for the "tud" that was heard when his partner stumbled behind him. "Kaoru dono! Daijobu? (Are you okay?)" he asked, approaching her.
The young woman was rubbing her left foot, sitting on the ground, although she did not seem to have a major injury.
"Gomen... I got distracted, my zori ribbon broke, but I'm fine."
After verifying that her words were true the redhead checked the shoe; indeed the strap was broken, so worn that there was no way to repair it at the moment. Not to mention the pressure to get to the point where they had to make camp.
The boy then turned his back, kneeling with his arms outstretched, palms up.
"I'll carry you." He offered, and the miko couldn't help but blush, looking at him with clear doubt in her eyes, he added. "Shishou said it; we are not far."
At the mention of the older one, she turned her gaze to him. The man stared at both of them, his countenance stoic, but he gave no refusal, so she ended up agreeing.
"Arigatou." She said, and grabbed her partner's body.
Kenshin tightened his grip on her legs, making her jump in reaction. She gripped the fabric of his gi with both hands at shoulder height. The redhead walked up to his teacher and looked at him out of the corner of his eye.
"We are ready, shishou."
And he began to advance ahead of him. Ignoring the attention the older man was paying him; calming down a bit when Hiko walked with them again. It was not easy, of course, it was more than clear that the disciple still had a long, long way to go to overcome his teacher. But at the same time, hours ago, the young samurai had decided not to be distracted from enjoying the closeness he had with his friend.
He didn't want any more regrets.
"Ne Kenshin…" Kaoru suddenly spoke to him. Her voice a slight whisper.
He wasn't the only one who had come to the same resolution.
"Hmm?" he murmured, still looking ahead.
Then he felt Kaoru wrap both arms around his neck, and his heart skipped a beat.
"I'm hugging you." She whispered, and even without seeing her he could draw her smile.
Kenshin felt his heart expand.
"You are, Kaoru dono, you are." He smiled.
His teacher, for his part, couldn't help but stare at them as he walked behind them. There were few things that the master of the Hiten Mitsurugi couldn't overlook… few things that could drive an alarm bell to his core.
This was one of them.
…
Just as Hiko had promised, they reached the camping spot half an hour later. An area near the road but within a fir forest. There was an open area between three tall trees, which, in turn, was close to a small river.
As soon as Kenshin let Kaoru down, she went out of her way to apologize and thank him and promised him the rest of the tea cakes. That was more than enough for the young man's strength to return a little. He also sat down to rest while the young woman - now barefoot - decided to take the task of going and getting water from the river. For his part, Hiko wasted no time in preparing the fire.
It would be a long night.
…
An hour later and laughter was filling their makeshift camp. They had been sharing stories from the past, little, innocent tales. But as always, Hiko had not missed the opportunity to embarrass his disciple. Soon he had redirected the larger of the stories towards the smaller until it ended up being completely his, much to the dismay of the poor redhead.
"To think I was training him to be a swordsman, and the idiot tries to poison himself with mushrooms." He complained.
Kaoru laughed out loud while Kenshin sank deeper into the log he was sitting on.
"You were so cute as a child." Kaoru said between laughs, imagining a mini Kenshin.
"I wouldn't use the word cute." Hiko pointed out with a smirk.
"Don't you think that was enough?" Kenshin scolded him, red with both anger and embarrassment.
His teacher took a drink from the sake bottle.
"Funny that I asked you the same question all those years you wet the bed."
Kaoru laughed again.
"Shishou…" Kenshin was reduced to a snarling bunch of anger.
His emotion was so great that it took him completely by surprise when Kaoru took his arm to reassure him. She smiled at him, and he was lost in the infinite brilliance of her blue orbs.
Hiko didn't miss a detail of the gesture.
"It's not that bad, Kenshin. We all have embarrassing things to remember."
Hiko gave a silent laugh.
"Not me. That I assure you." He declared haughtily.
Kaoru was going to refute, but this time it was Kenshin who stopped her, using the same gesture that she had used with him a moment before.
"Do not waste your time. Trust me, it's not worth it." He assured her. Then he stood up taking the wooden bucket. "I'll be right back."
It was clear he was going to the bathroom, the makeshift space they had made between the river and their camping area, so no one would question him. Furthermore, his countenance looked irritated. When he passed near Kaoru, however, she stopped him by taking his hand.
"You're not upset, are you?" She asked him genuinely concerned.
Kenshin's face softened almost instantly, touched by the sincere concern that shone in his friend's eyes. The boy shook his head, giving her a small smile before leaving.
She let him go. Returning to sit facing the boy's master, she couldn't stifle the smile that had dominated her lips.
Hiko, who until then had not stopped taking note of the interactions of the two teens, dared to break that bubble of happiness.
"You should watch your actions around him."
"Nani?"
Kaoru started and looked at him in genuine confusion.
Hiko had made that pause with the intention of having the miko's full attention. He had to make clear what she refused to admit, and he had to do it soon, before his own plan ended up blowing up on his face.
"In more ways than one you are still a child, but in others… you have changed. And he notices it."
The air then swayed the branches of the trees, the moon remained firm in the sky despite the clouds; its light did not give up. Kaoru felt a chill run down her spine.
"We have both changed." She said distractedly.
The man across from her took a deep breath, closing his eyes briefly as he remembered. "There is a phrase that says that the boy grows, but the girl matures."
For a moment, Kaoru thought she was having two conversations in one, until a part of her mind remembered what the older man had told her when they started that conversation.
"What does that have to do with how I treat him?" She challenged.
Hiko opened his eyes again and looked at her. His black orbs glistened with irritation.
"I've told you before, and I'll tell you again now. You're both a couple of idiots." He declared, aware of the moment when his words stuck like a thorn in the chest of the young woman in front of him. "But you are perhaps a little smarter simply because you admit it, so do not try to deny it. I know you understand what I mean."
She understood it. But that didn't mean she agreed.
"We don't have that kind of relationship." She assured. Her hands were sweating, and they clung even tighter to the cup they held.
Hiko studied her, considering her words.
"How old are you, girl?"
"I'll be thirteen in June."
He laughed again, his smile rising from the left corner.
"And yet you pretend to ignore it?"
Kaoru felt anger settle in her chest.
"He is an honorable young man-"
"He's just a kid!" The man spoke over her voice, successfully cutting her off, causing her to withdraw into herself as if she had been scolded.
After the pause, necessary for her to understand the gravity of his words, Hiko continued, his voice rising more and more due to the anger he was feeling. "A boy who barely knows what he wants to even think about how to get it. A child in the body of a man by the standards of the law. But a man at the end. At the right age to look for a partner..."
Hiko fixed his dark eyes on her, forcing her to look directly at him. She knew the trial that was taking place.
"He doesn't see you as a child." He stated.
The wind blew again, this time with more force. The flames of the campfire danced for a long time, describing rivers that rose to the sky with the advantage of wind caress. That only made Hiko look that much more imposing than he already was. Kaoru was looking at him through the flames; that hard gesture made her feel tiny.
"He hasn't done it for a while." He continued once the wind stopped blowing. "Mark my words. Simple exchanges, something as simple as a touch or a glance, a word spoken at the right, ideal moment... and he won't stop to think before acting."
The priestess loved her friend so much that even as much as she was intimidated by his teacher, she could not help but continue defending him, regardless of the fact that now she could only speak in a weak voice.
"He's never…-"
"Never?" He interrupted her again, the mockery installed in his words and his expression. "Are you suggesting that it hasn't already happened?"
Her face lowered as her mind searched her memories for something to defend him with.
"…He didn't…" she trailed off.
And this time, it was she herself who cut off her words. She remembered what had happened almost two days ago now. When they had stopped to fish in the Sakai River. She remembered what had happened… or rather what had been about to happen. How much Kenshin had apologized after being ashamed of himself. But she then had been driven away by a vision.
And even without the vision, she was not fully aware of what had been about to happen. She only remembered the approach, the caresses, the soft beating of Kenshin's heart under her hand...
Hiko, of course, understood.
"You refused then, I suppose. You did something that made him realize where he was at. And that is exactly the problem. You."
It was as if lightning had struck her, but instead of burning her, it had frozen her to the point of stealing her last cent of heat.
"You don't know what you feel. You don't realize what your actions can cause, what they already cause. You act without knowing that a single gesture that shows you correspond him, will be enough for him to take a risk. You've spent all this time feeling protected by your status that you haven't stopped to think about your feelings, much less his."
Her face had been lowering until she ended up looking at her hands, the same ones that still held the cup, although under slight but constant tremors. She had felt small before, but now she felt tiny and for even heavier reasons.
She felt like crying. Her eyes glazed over.
But Hiko didn't give her a break. It wasn't over yet.
"So unless you plan on receiving and reciprocating his attentions… don't give him false hope." He said, standing up and moving past her to prepare his bed on the floor. He gave her one last look before turning and leaving her. "You are no longer a chlid."
Kaoru bit her lower lip to control her own sadness.
The tea in her hands had grown cold.
...
Kenshin arrived then, smiling and humming a game song. Kaoru wiped away her tears as soon as she heard him.
"I brought more water." He spoke behind her, leaving the bucket at her feet. "I figured you'd need it to wash up before bed." And then he stopped, watching her look away from him and feeling the faint vibration of her ki as if she were wounded. "Are you OK?"
The miko was startled. She shook her head with a smile and, taking the bucket of water in her hands, she got up.
"Arigatou, Kenshin…" She said hastily, with a small bow after having decided to give him her smile and failing to keep her gaze, she ignored him.
Kenshin watched her go.
Then he narrowed his eyes in the direction of his master.
"Did you tell her something?" He inquired with some annoyance. But Hiko only returned the annoyed gesture before turning to lie down to sleep. "He told her something," Kenshin concluded to himself.
…
Kaoru had barely managed to hold back her tears when she had passed Kenshin. As soon as her back was turned to him, the tears slipped down her cheeks and continued to fall for a time that seemed both eternal and ephemeral to the young woman.
She didn't dare return to the camp until she had wiped away all her tears... She didn't even know why she was crying... But she felt that until then, her heart had lived with a series of locks on it.
And that now, after Hiko's words, one by one, they had begun to open up.
Throughout the entire process one question overcame all the other insecurities that plagued her.
"How do I feel about Kenshin?"
Even if she wasn't a grown woman yet she wasn't a child anymore...
"How do I feel about Kenshin?"
…
Kenshin stayed awake until Kaoru returned.
The young woman gave an excuse as to why she was late. And though it wasn't a very believable one, he didn't question it. She appreciated that and gave him a smile, assuring him that tomorrow she would feel better.
They both lay back on their makeshift beds. Kaoru turned her back on him. As soon as she was sheltered, the smile left her, and the same previous anguish returned to dominate her.
"How do I feel about Kenshin?"
She fell asleep before she could come up with an answer.
A/N: Is it too much to ask for a review where you let me know if you found Yahiko? xD