A/N: I do not own Anakin, Padmé or other characters, all rights reserved by Lucasfilm.
I write the stories just for fun and for free.
Why so much Sex ?…well, we didn't get enough from George Lukas ;-)

IN THE EYE OF THE STORM

Chapter 12

Padmé's initial post-suicide attempt status were quite depressing. While on medication, she remained suicidal. It was suggested that the parents wait to visit for the time being. Sola was shocked and unable to believe what had happened since she had such high expectations for Anakin and believed that he would do anything to Padme and would never harm her. When Ryoo and Pooja learned that Aunt Padmé was in the hospital, they couldn't understand why they weren't permitted to see her there. They continued inquiring about their aunt.

The time passed slowly, without much progress, it was unbearable.

These days, Jobal cries often, Ruwee drowns his grief in single malt, and even the housekeeper Maria shed a tear or two.

Week after week and month after month, therapy continued. Padme had to wait until the following year, if at all, to begin her studies at Harvard.

Through the sessions, the psychiatrist learned what made Padmé want to jump into the Hudson River.

Prior to Anakin, Padmé had miserable relationships with Rush Clovis and Palo, both of whom cheated on her. She had always questioned why they were acting in that way toward one other and wasn't sure whether she was beautiful enough, if they were missing something in her, or if it was something she wasn't yet ready to give them. As best as she could recall, they looked back on previous sessions in therapy and found that Palo and Clovis desired much more than just holding hands. She also feared losing Anakin that way and gave him what she felt he desperately wanted. Sex. Also, she loved him, not like Palo and Rush Clovis, kind of selflessly, to the point of complete self-abandonment, she didn't care about anyone in the world, but Anakin. She was sure that he loved her too, he showed it with every step, it seemed to her. Now she was sure, that she was wrong, he got what he wanted and more, she was no longer interesting. He started to make circles, like before and especially with this Pat. He was a playboy even if he insisted he wasn't. Nothing but lies. How was she so easily tricked? She felt angry with herself and vowed that she would never allow herself to go through such humiliation and pain again. She also promised to herself that her relationship with males was ended for good. She no longer needs men in her life.

Analyzing last night with Anakin has been done several times.

"Padmé, Anakin and you were together all night, and then you danced with Bradley."

"Yes, he's also an asshole."

"How so?"

"He's wanted me in his bed for a while,"

"And who or what spoke against it?"

"I'm not a whore, I love Anakin...I loved Anakin."

"You loved him or still do, you love him?"

Padme said nothing.

"So, after the dance you went to the restrooms and then...?"

"When I returned, Anakin was leaning against the wall. I saw this Pat put both of her arms around his neck and shamelessly press her hips against his, and he...he grinned at her and grabbed her forearms. Then I turned around and ran out in front of the entrance. And then I ran on and on and then...I don't remember anymore."

"Why did you leave, exactly?"

"Should I stay around to see his kissing of her?"

"Perhaps he did not kiss her. You haven't seen the whole interaction, you may have jumped to conclusions."

"I am aware of what I saw."

"Yes, that's true, but there was more. Don't you care how their interaction turned out?

"No."

"Why?"

"He hurt me,"

"We'll continue on in the next session."

"I don't want to talk about it anymore, I'm over it. I will move on, I need to get my life together."

"We'll discuss it further when we meet again. Don't bury any mysteries. I get the impression that you don't want to know the truth because you're unwilling to recognize that you may be wrong."

While these discussions had to continue until she was ready to be open to all options, but the picture from that particular night stayed in the back of her mind, and she was sure of what she had seen. That was to keep her in her snail shell, into which she had withdrawn for a long, long time.

After a six-month absence, she returned home just in time for Christmas. Everyone was glad but also thrilled to have Padmé home, and they were all careful what to say so as not to offend her or cause a relapse. Maria was always at home, she was never left alone.

The parents' annual Christmas party was held in the workplace on December 22nd, 2013. Parents hoped Padmé would come as well, but she didn't want to be blamed because everyone was aware of her hospitalization. She stayed with Maria at home.

At about 1:00 p.m., she felt hungry. She ate the tuna sandwich that Maria had prepared and settled in front of the 55-inch TV in the living room. She changed the channels in seconds on the remote while pressing the ESPN button.

She could see his face covering the whole tv-screen. The rookie Anakin Skywalker was used once again in this contest against the Cleveland Browns. She suddenly experienced both butterflies and knife cuts in her stomach, which together caused a cramp. It hurt...still hurts. How is it possible that her feelings for him have remained unchanged? It wasn't normal to have feelings for someone who had done all of this to her.

She switched off the TV and left the dish on the coffee table. Tears rushed from the eyes. Padmé, what have you learned, she said to herself. You can hide in the Antarctica if you don't want to see or interact with him, but you can't run away if you don't want to face whatever happens. Restart the TV and address your problem, which is still a problem.

She returned to the ESPN channel and continued to observe the game being played. Anakin was moving well and was quite concentrated, so she believed he achieved his goal. He moved on, which was nice for him and clearly wasn't a problem for him. His face appeared on the TV-screen as the offense left the field following after touchdown in the second quarter. He looked as gorgeous as ever, but serious, and she took another hard look. His eyes were tired and not so blue anymore. All he was doing was concentrating. She turned off once more before picking up her lunch and reflecting. A successful player, rich, famous, handsome and single, but no girl behinde to cheer him on, just his parents. Funny….but she shouldn't worry about it anymore, she was over it…..she thought…..she told herself.

Only time and ongoing therapy will tell if they have been successful in making progress towards letting go, accepting, getting over it.

Christmas was reserved for the family and having everyone around made them forget about everything else. In those days she gained weight, which had been good for her, she was emaciated.

Sometime in the spring, Jobal saw the stagnation of Padmé's status. She talked to her husband about the problem and informed him that she want to take some time off to travel the world with Padmé. Ruwee believed that was an excellent idea because the daughter was more important than the legal practice, he could handle it alone, and there were enough of young attorneys working on the case.

In April 2014, Padmé and her mother took a flight to London, their first destination. Several European capitals followed, including Rome, where they attended the Italian Open tennis event and watched the championship match while supporting Raphael Nadal and winner Novak Djokovic.

After that came some countries of the Near East and Middle East, where the war did not prevail. Several African countries were also among their destinations and then they flew towards the Far East, following the sun. She felt they might stay longer because it was so odd and fascinating; nevertheless, they had a plan, and everything was reserved and paid for in advance. All the Pacific islands they visited, as well as Australia and New Zealand, were stunning. South and Central America were essential. They took a detour across Canada while already "at home" in Hawaii and returned to New York four months later.

There were so many impressions Padmé was receiving that they nearly overwhelmed her. She was unsure of her favorite country—was it Japan or Israel?

Padmé returned to therapy after this trip, which wasn't happening as frequently as it had in the past. She was feeling a little bit better. She made the choice to turn on her iPhone. She quickly started chatting with Dormé, Sabé, Satine, and Ben. None dared to bring up Anakin's name since they didn't want to stress her already precarious situation. She told them that in the fall, she would begin her studies at Harvard. Ben and Satine were overjoyed.

Anakin received the information, but he was no more in the clique since he was no longer a student, he had a job, a nice job, much money, and nothing else.

Padmé arrived in Boston at the end of August 2014, rented an apartment on Langdon St. not far from the Law School, and made herself at home for the ensuing 2.5 years. The desk and bookshelf in the living room were the two most important pieces of furniture in the apartment. She had a 50-inch TV, a modest two-seater sofa, and a side table. There was a queen-sized bed in the bedroom. Built-in kitchenette with a tiny pull-out table, more like a kitchen than a full-sized kitchen. There was a little shower next to kitchen. She had more than she actually needed. Anyway, it's starting now, and she's always intent on being the best of the year. She can do it, she wants it, and she'll do it. She also believed that if she put anything else in her thoughts, she would manage to bring her life under control.

She visited a psychotherapist once a week here in Boston.

She didn't get to visit Satine and Ben very frequently, so it was difficult for her to see their relationship's happiness. As a result, she lost everything. When you get involved with the wrong men, this is what will always happen to you, she reasoned. How might she prevent making the same errors again? Yes, stay away from men.

She used Skype to communicate with Dormé and Sabé, and she only sometimes thought about Anakin because she always blamed him for her problems. She shed a few tears as she thought back on happy moments from his birthday, or another happy day.

She ended the first year as the best in May 2015. She concentrated only on her books, so it makes sense. She stayed home and didn't search for friends. Her social life consisted of a few dates with Satine and Ben. She was viewed as an oddity on school. She always had lovely clothes on, was well-groomed, and wore modest makeup. Some people believed she exhibited some narcissism..

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Best regards from Germany and thank you for reading.