Back with chapter 11!
This is more a little filler, but I really wanted to show Laura's feeling the day after the ball.
The next proper, big chapter is coming soon. Thank you all so much for your comments!

To Starbuck: Also you are right about the eye color, I changed it to grey-green.

To Guest: Yes Bill is already smitten with her. Even though he doesn't want to.

Disclaimer: I still don't own the BSG characters

May 1803

Thoughts and Inner Conflicts

Laura Roslin

If there was one magic power Laura really wanted to have, it would be the ability to look into peoples' minds and find out what they felt, what they thought, what made them do what they did. Right now, she would have loved to know what William Adama thought of her. And Karolina Thrace. Which was a girlish thought that she wanted to push away as far as possible, but that somehow did not work. She could call on them and find out, maybe apologize. But apologize for what? For stopping the girl from humiliating herself? If Karolina was her daughter, she would have been grateful if somebody had pointed out an embarrassing detail like that. At least she thought so. It wasn't as if she had ever been in that situation.

Talking about the current military situation with Adama however was something she would really like to do, but it was no reason for a social call, at least not for a woman. Politics were no place for a lady, or at least not openly. Behind the scenes, they could have a certain power and influence, but hardly anybody would admit that. Roslin could only hope they would run into each other again. It was unlikely, especially as she would leave for Hertfordshire so soon, but it was nevertheless possible.

At the same time, she was aware that meeting him at all might not be the best thing that could happen to her. He had confused her and confusion was not good for the things that she did. Laura was definitely not looking for a husband and she did not have the feeling that he was the type of man who would agree to an affair. Also, being close to him would very likely not bring any advantage. She could do better with at least two men she knew. Problem was, she was suddenly not at all motivated to pursue any relationship with them any further. Hopefully it was just a mood, especially after ending things with Lord Adar. Getting out of London and to the countryside was definitely a good plan and she would worry in October when the new season in Town would start for her.

To distract herself, she wondered whether she should call on Isabelle but decided against it. Her friend would probably ask again for details about Adama. Even though Mrs Agathon knew nearly anything about Laura's aims and motivations, she still tried to set her up with nice guys from time to time. The brown-haired woman always refused. Those gentlemen deserved someone who had a serious interest in them, a sweet, devoted wife. Laura was polite. Yes. She was caring about the people who meant something to her. Yes. Still, sweet was not a word she would use to describe herself. Sweet implied innocent. And even though she was not what Helena Cain implied her to be, Laura Roslin was far from innocent.

Thank you for reading!

Up next: Bill's and Kara's social call