I sat on the brack facing Austin's window, waiting for him to come home. I needed an answer. I wasn't clingy but I needed to know why the kiss happened.
Damn, I was starting to sound like one of those pathetic clingy teenage girls whose boyfriends wouldn't pick up their calls. I, on the other hand, hadn't bothered calling Austin because I knew he was probably having some me-myself-and-I time in the park.
The door of Austin's room swung open and I stood up immediately, walking to the window and knocking at it. I saw Austin walking through the door – wait, stumbling through the door – and he wasn't alone.
He was making out with some blonde chick who looked pretty familiar. Guess he wasn't at the park like I thought he was, huh? Guess I don't know everything about him like I thought I did.
My heart tore into half. I honestly felt something really special in the kiss we had. For a moment, I actually believed that Austin may have actually harbored some kind of romantic feelings for me. Hah! Joke of the century. Joke's on me, hmm, Austin?
The icky couple finally disconnected their lips from each other and I realized who the girl was.
Beth Millers.
Looks like we can finally cross her off the To-Do List, eh?
I knocked on the window but they paid me no attention as they continued smooching. I felt like I was watching a live porn show.
Dejected, I trudged my feet back to my bedroom and plopped myself onto the bed.
Once a player, always a player. There's no use crying over Austin Monica Moon, Ally. You've known him since you were foeti, and you've only loved him since the both of you were born. It's no big deal. Nope.
Ally's YAYs of the Day:
NAY.
It's like the whole world's against me. It's official, everyone hates me. The lid of my piano fell on my fingers while I was playing the piano today. My fingers still hurt like !#$% from it. Even my own piano wants me dead! I have no reason to live anymore.
It's official – Austin has a girlfriend. A girlfriend! Turns out, Beth Millers was, apparently, the girl he met at summer camp and fell in love with. I was pretty confused though, since he's known Beth since freshman year (his freshman year. Beth has been a freshman for years). They made their relationship official at school today.
Well, I guess there's no need for the To-Do List anymore.
Or was there…?
I was alone in my bedroom. Adam was out on his and Trish's first date (finally! Trish apologized and they've been attached by the hip ever since), Austin was out on his date with Beth Death (my new nickname for her, you likey?) and Dez was in detention for causing yet another explosion in the school's chemistry lab.
Thanksgiving was on Thursday and it was Tuesday. I wasn't particularly excited about Thanksgiving this year. My mom, an anthropology professor at UMiami, was in Africa on her sabbatical and she was writing this book about gorillas. My dad was at a mattress convention in Russia with Austin's parents and would only be back in two weeks' time. He honestly couldn't care less about mattresses but the Moons had offered to pay for his accommodation and expenses so naturally, he jumped at the opportunity.
Austin and I were planning on spending Thanksgiving together since both our parents were out of town but Beth decided to throw a party and she forced – I mean, asked – Austin to be her co-host. I was attending the party but I doubt I would see much of Austin.
Life sucks.
And then you die.
I'm quite the optimist, aren't I?
As I sat alone in my room, I began to contemplate the meaning of life. The world is weird, don't you think?
Why do we call a building a building if it has already been built?
What are there locks on 7-Eleven doors if they're open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week?
Why do we park on the driveway and drive on the parkway?
Why are they called "hamburgers" if they're made of beef?
If there are unsung heroes, what are sung heroes?
Why is it a "free gift" if all gifts are free?
I will never understand this contradictory world we live in.
Why are the phrases "wise man" and "wise guy" antonyms?
What is the phobia of phobias called? Or the phobia of the phobia of phobias? Or the phobia of the phobia of the phobia of phobias?
Why are boxing rings square?
Why isn't '11' pronounced as "onety-one", '22' as "twoty-two", '33' as "threety-three" and so forth?
Which sadist decided to put a 's' in 'lisp'?
What is a synonym for 'synonym'?
English is such a weird language. But then again, so is Mandarin. I once had a student from China live with me while she was on an exchange program here in America and she told me that "ni hao", which means "hello" in Mandarin, literally means "you're good" if directly translated from Mandarin to English. Go figure.
I wonder where your lap goes when you stand up?
Who is the 'they' people refer to when they say "You know what they say"?
If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests?
Why is it when you transport something by car it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
Why do "slim chance" and "fat chance" mean the same thing when "slim" and "fat" are polar opposites?
Why are there five syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?
I don't know.
What a weird world.
What an eventful week.
Austin and I kissed for the second time. Our first time didn't count though, we were eight and we promised that we would love each other and only each other and promised to get married when we grew up. We sealed it with a kiss.
Look how that turned out, li'l Ally-D.
To be honest, I can't remember how our first kiss felt like since that happened 10 years ago. But I'm just glad to have been his first kiss.
On the other hand, I definitely remembered the kiss we shared just the day before. His warm lips moving against mine with so much need and passion. Tongues weren't involved but I'm not complaining.
Wait, hold up – I just got a brilliant idea that involved two of Trish's favorite things: payback and making someone jealous. If I were a comic book character, there'd be a gigantic bazillion-watt light bulb lit up above my head right now.
I picked up my beloved fountain pen and the black book on my desk, opened it and started crafting my diabolical plan by writing five words:
Ally Dawson's To-Do List.