/CONTENT WARNING: Possible Suicide Trigger/
"Heya." My eyes flickered open. There, a few feet away, was Ink, pouring over his sketchbook. He seemed almost solemn. "Sorry for being so scattered. I guess the excitement of having a new friend in the Doodle Sphere was a little much for me." Slowly, I sat up. Ink sensed this and threw a light, apologetic smile my way. "I forgot how overwhelming all this can be," he continued. "If I wasn't so out of it, perhaps you wouldn't have come so close to dusting. It might be my fault all this happened. I'm sorry. Could you ever forgive me for being so careless?"
Such sober words from Ink surprised me; I wasn't sure he was capable of coherent thought. For a moment, I felt frustrated with him. Of course this was his fault! He brought me here, right? He failed to inform me of ground-shaking information and I almost choked on the facts. I almost died! Yet… he seemed truly down about the situation. He didn't want this to happen. Anyway, he did save my life. Twice. And, he did just apologize. all things considered… I sighed.
"yeah, it's alright. apology accepted," I affirmed. At this, it seemed a weight was lifted from Ink, and he smiled a mile wide.
From there, life blurred together.
Over the next few "days," it began to sink in that I wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't so boring. True, Ink was around most of the time, and was "entertaining" in some way or another, whether intentional or not. Dream popped in from time to time; I found that, if I called his name loud enough, he'd show up. Yet, they both appeared distracted, especially when they were together. It seemed to me that they were trying to work out some problem, but, they wouldn't tell me what it was about. I managed to convince myself it didn't matter. I wouldn't be here for long, right? I'd go home soon… right?
Honestly, I was worried. So often, Ink had to materialize a new patch over my shoulder blades. It wouldn't stay. Whenever the healing faltered, my HP went down. It was terrifying. If I went home, would this keep happening? And, what would happen without Ink there to do something about it? I tried to block those questions out.
The sketchbook Ink gave me on my first "day" attested to my lack of artistic skill, so I instead would fold origami from the messed up pages. When I wasn't drawing pathetic stick figures or throwing planes, I watched the Wigglers or chased the Windows. The Wigglers seemed to like me. We played games together. I don't know what kind, really, but they seemed to enjoy my company; they followed me around.
Windows remained a mystery. I'd often see them appearing over Ink's sketchbook. He'd search them, then flick them on. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't catch up to any. They steered away from me. It was like chasing a cloud.
But, eventually… something went wrong.
I wandered around the white expanse, boredly searching for Ink. I couldn't find him. I'd called his name, tried to ride the current, followed swarms of Wigglers, and backtracked Windows. Nothing led me to him. I didn't exactly need a companion, I was just bored.
But, after what felt like a full 24 hours, I started to worry. I'd been alone before, but never this long. I searched harder, I called Ink's name again, I called Dream's name... But nobody came.
A long time passed. There was no one. I was alone. I was starting to get nervous… when the world flickered. When the air flashed from white to grey, I started, jumping about an inch at the sudden darkness. Then the light came back. But then it happened again. Even though I knew the Doodle Sphere was endless, I started running. Something was wrong, wrong, wrong!
i have to find ink. i don't think he's here, but i have to keep looking! I shouted Dream's and Ink's names. But nobody came. The world hitched again, this time for a full six seconds before resuming. What would happen if the light went out for good? Just as this thought entered my mind, the air flashed, then, went a dark, dead grey, and everything froze. I came to a skidding stop. The silent pulse in the atmosphere was gone. Wigglers and Windows hovered motionless in the air. Everything just… stopped.
I glanced around, half expecting the world to implode on me. But nothing happened.
"… ink? dream?" I called shakily. "are you guys doing this?" I waited… but nobody came.
Hesitantly, upon deciding I wasn't in any immediate danger, I started wandering around. It was strange seeing clouds of unmoving Wigglers. They were always so energetic. And, for the first time, I got a good look at the Windows. They were hauntingly familiar, yet, disquietingly different.
perhaps these are the other "worlds" dream and ink were talking about. they're… freaky. Then, as my gaze landed on one, my soul missed a beat. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was Snowdin. I dashed forward, hand outstretched, sure that the world would unfreeze and I would lose this glimpse of home. Right as I reached forward, the light flashed back on—I touched the Window.
There was a blinding explosion of white. I felt as though I had been thrown from a building. Moaning, I sat up. In front of me stretched a white path, veiled in white, covered by a white sky. For a moment, I thought the Doodle Sphere had lost its color, until I heard a sound behind me and whirled—
"papyrus!" I cried, launching myself at my brother in a big hug, evidently stunning him. "you're here! oh my goodness, you're here! i'm home, i must be home!" I was a bit surprised he hadn't spoken. I blubbered on anyway. "dream and ink must have found out how to send me back. i don't know how, all i know is this is the happiest i've ever been… paps, you have no idea what i've been through, but none of it matters now…"
He wasn't moving. Slowly, I tipped my head up, and realized… he wasn't even looking at me. It was like he couldn't feel, hear, or see me at all. He was gazing past me, watching for something.
"… bro?"
"HALT, HUMAN!" I jumped at the sudden exclamation. Then the words sank in. Numbly, I shakily turned around to see a veiled form stalking towards us.
"no… no! why are they here?" I lamented. They took a step forward.
"HEY, QUIT MOVING WHILE I'M TALKING TO YOU! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE SOME THINGS TO SAY…"
"no, no, no! paps, no! run! please!" I begged, turning and trying to get his attention. "please don't let this happen!"
"HUMAN! I THINK YOU ARE IN NEED OF GUIDANCE! SOMEONE NEEDS TO KEEP YOU ON THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW!" I heard the crunch of snow, signaling the approach of the human. "I SEE YOU ARE APPROACHING. ARE YOU OFFERING A HUG OF ACCEPTANCE?"
"no!" I wailed, yanking on him, trying to pull him from harm's way, panicking.
"I WELCOME YOU WITH OPEN ARMS!"
"NO!" I cried, turning, flattening myself against him. I saw the human bolt forward… I stretched my arms out in attempt to shield Papyrus… the blade passed right through me.
Time slowed as I heard the crack. I felt the light darken. I fell to my knees. I didn't need to turn to know my brother was dead. Broken, I stared horrorstricken into the blood-red eyes of the human, smiling gleefully. Burring my face in my hands, I sobbed. Then, it all melted away.
I was back in the Doodle Sphere, weeping pitifully. It was all for nothing. I had sacrificed everything for nothing. I was here, safe in the realm of creativity, while Papyrus was left with a genocidal hacker. He was left alone. i left him alone. and now he's dead. My entire being shook with misery. Everything was wrong…
Why didn't it work? It should have worked! The human shouldn't have been able to return! Yet, somehow, I failed. Why?! perhaps it's because i survived. At this thought, I stopped cold. what would happen… if i died here? would i wake up in my bed at home, or… would i dust for good? would that save my world? if i died? but, how would i know? either way… it doesn't matter. i can't do anything to save anyone… i couldn't save him… i'm sorry papyrus… you deserve life, not me… i've done terrible things… you should be here, not me… i can't do this. i can't stay here but i can't go on…
Either way, it didn't matter. It was Save or Dust.
Sobbing, I pressed my hand over my chest and pinged out my soul. Cringing at the discomfort of the action, I stared at it. It pulsated, faster than normal, a light teal, paler than usual. The cracks from over the resets remained. It looked so… broken. Either way, something good would happen, right? Either my world would be saved, I would wake up at home, or, I would be forevermore blissfully ignorant of the pain.
Tears blurred my vision. Summoning a small blue bone attack, no longer than my forearm, I turned my face away and pierced my own soul. I felt nothing, naturally, because I wasn't moving. But the moment I let go of my soul, it would snap back into place behind my ribcage… and the blue attack would activate. And I would dust.
One last time, I stole a glance. The small, cracked, glowing mass fluttered frantically, as if begging me to reconsider. For a moment, I hesitated. Is this… what Papyrus would have wanted? Then, suddenly, I shut my eyes and let go.
…
Nothing happened.
Stifling a whimper, I slowly pried my eyes open. Blinking, I gaped at the scene before me. Despite the fact I had stopped pinging, my soul still hovered before me, bone attack and all, encased in a blue flame. but… how—
"Serif." My head whipped around. There, trembling slightly, stood Ink. He had pinged my soul.
"no…" I whispered. "no, ink, please… just let me go!"
"No Serif," he said.
"please! no, i can't do this!" At these words, I grabbed for my soul. He suddenly engaged gravity, stronger than normal, and I crashed to the ground, held there by weighted chains.
"That wasn't your world," Ink insisted pronouncedly.
"wh… what?"
"That was not your world," Ink repeated. "What you saw was not real. Your world is safe. Your brother is alive." I was shaking once more, weeping. I couldn't tell if I was relieved or horrified.
Ink walked over, almost staggering at one point, and gazed numbly at my soul. Bringing his hand up, he swept a finger through the attack. His HP temporarily became visible as the single damage point was shifted to him. I balked when I saw his stats. It was critically low!
"ink," I gasped, "your health—"
"Is fine," he finished firmly. The extra gravity disengaged, but I remained sprawled on the ground, fighting tears. It was then I noticed the signs of battle.
In many areas, Ink's clothes had fine rips. There was a small gash on the side of his skull, which had been turned away from me till now, and rainbow colors slowly seeped from it. It appeared his right wrist was fractured. Yet, even as my eyes widened, I saw the edges slowly coming back together, healing.
"I'm fine," he repeated, then turned around. "Dream," he called. A moment later, a weary-looking Dream stumbled through a portal.
"Yes, Ink? What's—" Dream caught sight of my pathetic state and stopped. Ink strode over and held up my soul for him.
"No questions. No explanation needed. Just watch over him for me, please," Ink requested. At "please," I heard the sadness break past the shock; he turned, and walked into the distance.