Taking Back the Crown

by JCMorrigan

Mozenrath. Archibald Snatcher. Roman Torchwick. Mad Madam Mim. Yzma. The Huntsman. Wuya. Ayam Aghoul. Their mission: take over the multiverse, or look fabulous trying. Rated M for swearing, steamy implications and VERY bloody battles. Contains slash and het shipping.

126. He Who Smiles at a Crocodile

A/N: For this one, you'll want to know the song "Kidnap the Sandy Claws" from The Nightmare Before Christmas! Also, a trigger warning; hit the end notes if you think anything might bother you.

...

Ven had figured Papyrus had tagged along to Keyblade training in order to keep an eye on him, make sure he didn't hurt himself. He didn't mind that one bit. Truth be told, though he no longer felt so extremely hollow, and much less inclined to do anything drastic, part of himself still felt like it wasn't a good thing for him to be alone – or among a crowd of people he just couldn't tell.

The others had been happy to bring him along. Sora in particular wanted to show off how good he was getting at Wishing Edges. They'd had a somewhat lively conversation on the train ride down – not knowing about the night Ven and Papyrus had shared worrying. And nobody, not even Ven, knowing about the revelation that had come to Papyrus after that.

But there were further secrets still. Because Papyrus hadn't told Ven the whole story about why he'd wanted to come along. To keep an eye on him, yes. Because he loved him, yes. But there was one piece more.

He hung back to play the role of the appreciative audience and morale-booster while the trainees got to work at the rings. He cheered enough that they knew he was there. Then they became distracted by their work, which was good. Papyrus knew Ven was filling his mind with productive things that could stave off the pain.

"Aqua?" Ven asked, noticing Aqua miss a ring completely and stumble as she landed on the ground. "You doing okay?"

"Yeah," Aqua revealed. "Just…a bit tired."

"Didja have a rough night sleepin'?" Goofy asked.

"Well…I…um…" Aqua turned red. "I stayed out late with a…friend, and by the time I got back to my room, it was already too late to get any decent sleep, so I just stayed up the last few hours and thought I could catch up when I got back. I guess it hit me harder than I thought."

"Who were you staying out with until the middle of the night?" Riku asked.

"Sounds suspicious…" Donald grunted.

"Oh, no!" Aqua put up her hands and waved them. "It wasn't anything bad. It's just…I know if I tell you about it now, it'll derail our training completely."

"Hey, how about we make a deal?" Sora offered. "We do the Obstacle Run, and if I beat you, then you gotta tell us all the details!"

"Sora." Aqua smiled softly. "I'm a Master. I can still beat you even with sleep deprivation."

"Then put your money where your mouth is!"

"Hey, wanna start a betting pool?" Lea suggested. "After this, I buy everyone ice cream, but anyone who bets on the winner gets double."

And so the competition was on, with the Three Fairies overseeing. The perfect diversion.

Papyrus slunk off to the side, where Yen Sid was watching. "ER…MR. YEN SID, SIR?"

"Yes?" Yen Sid replied. "Is there something I may answer?"

"WELL…I…UH…HAVE SOME CONCERNS," Papyrus brought up. "ABOUT SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED IN THE PAST. WITH VEN. AND AQUA AND TERRA, ALSO, BUT PRIMARILY VEN. I'M…WORRIED FOR HIM, YOU SEE, AND I KNOW HE SPOKE TO YOU ONCE BACK THEN, BEFORE HE WENT TO SLEEP. BUT MORE THAN THAT…UM…YOU'RE SORT OF RELATED TO A PROBLEM THAT'S…"

Yen Sid's brows raised. "I am not yet sure what you are getting at," he admitted, "but I can tell you wish to discuss it in private, where Ventus and his classmates cannot hear."

"YES," Papyrus admitted. "THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT IS GOING ON."

"I see." Yen Sid nodded. "Might I suggest another, to hear what you have to say? You may very well object. However, I am aware that Mickey was close with Ventus during those years, and grieved over his tragedy. He was my student at the time, as were Donald and Goofy. Of the three, Mickey is the one I most trust with sensitive information, and he may have key insights regarding Ventus."

"HMM…" Papyrus thought it over. "YES. I'M COOL WITH HIM HEARING THIS. HE MIGHT KNOW THINGS THAT COULD HELP, OR MAYBE HAVE SOLUTIONS, OR…" Had he pores, he would have been sweating. "I CAN'T SAY MORE OUT HERE."

"I understand." Yen Sid nodded, striding forth. "Wait but a moment."

"Well, gosh, I dunno," Mickey told Lea as Sora and Aqua squared up at the starting line. "Sora's pretty powerful, but Aqua's tough enough to stick it out in the Darkness for ten years. Then again, Sora was able to beat Ansem and Xemnas both…I guess I don't know who could finish the course faster."

"You could forfeit any bet at all," Lea told him, "and also your right to a double ice cream whatsoever."

A hand fell on Mickey's shoulder. "I shall pay for his second," Yen Sid stated coldly. "There is a matter I must speak of with him at once regarding his training."

"My training?" Mickey flinched.

"You will not regret having this conversation," Yen Sid urged.

"Well, okay." Mickey turned to follow Yen Sid off the field, giving the others a wave. "Good luck, fellas!"

"We won't need luck!" Sora boasted.

"I'm not certain we should be doing this," Fauna worried. "Especially when there's ice-cream gambling invo – "

"On your mark!" Merryweather barked. "GET READY!"

As Flora sighed, Merryweather yelled "GO!", and Sora and Aqua began their challenge run, Mickey followed Yen Sid closer to the tower, where Papyrus awaited.

"I apologize for the deception," Yen Sid said softly, "but this has nothing to do with your training, Mickey. Papyrus mentioned a concern regarding Ventus."

"Ven?" Mickey repeated. "What's wrong with Ven?"

"NOT OUT HERE, PLEASE," Papyrus said anxiously, joints rattling.

"Ohhhhh," Mickey realized. "This is serious."

"Let us step inside," Yen Sid offered. "I know where we can speak without the fear of prying ears."

He entered the Mysterious Tower with mouse and skeleton following behind. However, instead of ascending the spiral stairway, he instead walked around to the inner edge behind it, passing a hand over the seemingly blank wall. A door appeared, a pleasantly brown and smooth wood.

"Gosh!" Mickey gasped. "This must really be serious, if we're goin' to Yen Sid's super secret laboratory!"

"SUPER SECRET LABORATORY?" Papyrus' eyes sparkled. "I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THOSE WORDS!"

"With so many trainees," Yen Sid explained, "I hope I can one day put this laboratory to use again. However, for the time being, it shall serve as a place where we can have whispered discussions."

On the other side of the door was a warmly brown hall with a fireplace at one end, opening out to a larger chamber at the other. Squat, crooked bookshelves laden with tomes decorated the walls. There was a stairway leading further up, but that wasn't for today. Instead, Yen Sid gestured toward the polished wooden table, where three tall-backed chairs were waiting – as if Yen Sid had known there would be a need to seat three. "Sit," he commanded.

Mickey hopped up eagerly into a chair while Papyrus gingerly settled down into another. Finally, Yen Sid gracefully took the third seat.

"Tell me, Papyrus," Yen Sid commanded, leaning toward the skeleton ever so slightly. "What is it that concerns you regarding Ventus?"

"WELL…HMMM." Papyrus pondered it. "IT'S KIND OF A LOT. I'M NOT SURE WHERE TO START. OH! YES. I KNOW WHERE TO START. WITH YOU TWO PROMISING THAT YOU NEVER TELL HIM I TOLD YOU ANY OF THIS, BECAUSE HE WOULDN'T WANT ME TO. HE MADE ME PROMISE NOT TO TELL AQUA, AND I'M STICKING TO THAT ONE, BUT HE WOULDN'T BE HAPPY ABOUT THIS, EVEN IF HE NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT IT."

"Why can't ya tell him what's goin' on?" Mickey asked. "Why do all this behind his back?"

"BECAUSE…" Papyrus sighed. "I GUESS WHEN YOU LOVE SOMEONE, YOU REALLY DO HAVE TO LIE TO THEM SOMETIMES."

Yen Sid nodded. "You care for him quite deeply, I see."

"WELL, THAT'S BESIDE THE POINT," Papyrus said quickly. "THIS IS ABOUT VEN, NOT ME. LAST NIGHT, WE HAD AN…INCIDENT. WELL, IT ACTUALLY STARTED EARLIER, WHEN WE WERE IN MONSTROPOLIS, BUT…" His bony hands curled into fists, shaking, rattling. "OH, ALL RIGHT, I'LL JUST SAY IT ALREADY! VEN HAS STARTED WISHING HE DIDN'T EXIST!"

Mickey gasped and gave a cry; Yen Sid flinched.

"Why would he say a thing like that?" Mickey asked. "Ven makes so many people happy! Like me, and Snow White, and Hercules! Maybe we just gotta round up some of those people and have 'em remind him he's worth somethin'!"

"I fear there may be more to the story than that," Yen Sid sighed. "Papyrus, please do enlighten us as to how Ventus began to think these dark thoughts."

"HE REMEMBERED EVERYTHING FROM BEFORE HE WENT TO SLEEP," Papyrus explained. "HE THINKS TERRA AND AQUA WOULD NEVER HAVE GOTTEN HURT IF HE'D JUST…LET HIMSELF GET KILLED. AND HE THINKS BEING HALF OF THAT BIG KEY IS ALL HE WAS, WHICH MADE HIM DANGEROUS. SO DANGEROUS, IT WASN'T WORTH EXISTING. BUT THAT'S NOT RIGHT AT ALL! HE…HE'S MORE THAN A WEAPON, AND HE ALWAYS WAS! WHERE WOULD WE BE WITHOUT HIM? AND TERRA…IT'S COMPLICATED, OKAY? THAT WASN'T HIS FAULT!"

"I do agree," Yen Sid said before giving a sigh. "This is disheartening to say the least. All the same, I cannot say I don't understand. To have such a heavy burden placed upon him, one the stars did not even inform me of until it was far too late…or perhaps I did not know where to look to see it properly. Only when Ventus was sound asleep did I realize."

"It musta been horrible," Mickey said somberly. "Thinkin' he was just somethin' awful and wonderin' if his friends woulda been better off. What happened back then was a real tragedy, but it wasn't Ven's fault! It was all Xehanort!"

"Which makes it all the more pertinent we prioritize finding a way to subdue Xehanort," Yen Sid said with a nod. "Papyrus, I am aware you subscribe to a pacifist philosophy."

"EVERYONE DESERVES A SECOND CHANCE, I THINK," Papyrus said. "AND A THIRD AND A FOURTH AND SO ON. IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO CHANGE."

"I had thought destroying Xehanort was the only way," Yen Sid sighed. "Yet…I do wish my old friend could stand at my side again. Though I know there is nothing left of the boy I once knew in him…I do wish, so dearly, that there was. If there is even the slightest chance he could be brought back to the Light, or even the path to twilight or dawn…we must take it."

"I'm no fan of Xehanort's," Mickey said, brow furrowed, "but I know how much he meant to ya. We gotta figure this out without him gettin' too hurt. All the same…he's gotta answer for what he did to Ven!"

"THERE IS…ANOTHER THING," Papyrus admitted. "THE REAL THING I NEEDED TO DISCUSS WITH YOU. I'M…WORRIED ABOUT SOMETHING, AND I FEEL LIKE THE ONLY ONE WHO'S EVEN NOTICED. MAYBE THAT MEANS IT ISN'T ANYTHING. I HOPE IT ISN'T STUPID. I'M ABOUT TO ACCUSE SOMEONE OF SOMETHING VERY BAD, AND IF THAT ENDS UP BEING WRONG – "

"Do not be afraid to speak," Yen Sid replied. "If you have misjudged, we will help you sort through it. However, a differing perspective is always valuable."

"If Merlin were here," Mickey said cheerily, "he'd say havin' both sides is just what makes the worlds go 'round!"

"VERY WELL." Papyrus quivered, the rattling even louder. Why was this so hard to say? Oh, right. Because he was about to accuse someone that Ven and Yen Sid both cared about of being a horrible person.

"I TALKED TO VEN LAST NIGHT ABOUT WHY HE FELT THE WAY HE DID," Papyrus went on. "HE SAID SOMETHING THAT FRIGHTENED ME. WELL, LOTS OF THINGS. ARE YOU ALL AWARE THAT ERAQUS KEPT HIM FROM LEAVING HOME BECAUSE HE WAS HALF OF THE BIG KEY?"

"I did not put two and two together until after the fact," Yen Sid admitted. "I knew Eraqus to be…strict. I had thought he simply held high standards, that he was protective. When I first met Ventus, I encouraged him to push past the boundaries Eraqus had set, thinking they were my friend's fears manifesting too strongly. Not realizing the source."

"BUT HE NEVER TOLD VEN ABOUT IT," Papyrus went on. "ISN'T THAT A LITTLE WEIRD?"

"It is," Mickey realized. "I wonder why."

"BUT IT GETS WORSE," Papyrus continued. "VEN…SAID…THAT WHEN ERAQUS TOLD HIM ABOUT THE BIG KEY…THAT'S WHEN HE FIRST STARTED THINKING HE SHOULDN'T EXIST. BECAUSE…BECAUSE ERAQUS TOLD HIM HE SHOULDN'T."

A heavy silence descended in the room.

"That is indeed a weighty accusation," Yen Sid said at last. "I wish to believe my friend of boyhood would not treat his ward so. And yet…I see no reason for Ventus to lie to you, or you to me about a man long dead. There is confusion somewhere in this story; it does not add up to make sense."

"You said Eraqus was strict, though," Mickey pointed out. "You think he…coulda been so worked up over the Light and Dark that he'd think about that first, and Ven second?"

"I…" Yen Sid's voice grew hushed. "I wish I could answer either way with confidence. Yet it had been so long since he and I spoke directly…largely because I feared his disapproval of my own choices and emotions."

"IT GETS WORSE," Papyrus stated. "AGAIN. THIS…THIS IS THE HARD PART TO TELL." A long silence; they let him work up the nerve. "VEN SAID ERAQUS ACTUALLY TRIED TO KILL HIM RIGHT THERE."

A dual gasp.

"VEN ALSO SAID HE AGREED TO IT!" Papyrus said hastily. "AND MAYBE HE DID. BUT I'M NOT SO SURE."

"Could it be…?" Yen Sid muttered beneath his breath. "For Xehanort to betray me is one matter…but for both of my friends to fall into the extremes of Dark and Light, to become corrupted? It seems unlikely, and at the same time, Xehanort set a precedent that my friends of youth grew up to become different people than those whom I thought I knew well."

"Anything else, Papyrus?" Mickey asked. "Does it keep getting worse?"

"YES," Papyrus said, "BUT I THINK YOU KNOW THIS PART. SO THE WAY VEN TELLS IT, HE WAS READY TO DIE, WHICH I HATE SO MUCH! BUT THEN TERRA SHOWED UP AND ALL HE SAW WAS ERAQUS TRYING TO KILL HIM. SO TERRA GOT VEN SOMEWHERE SAFE AND WENT TO TALK TO ERAQUS, AND VEN DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED AFTER THAT, BUT THAT'S WHEN ERAQUS ENDED UP DEAD."

"I see." Yen Sid inhaled deeply. Exhaled fully. "The day of Eraqus' downfall…the stars told me it was Terra and Xehanort who worked together to strike him down. I knew no more. I feared Terra had been swayed fully into Darkness. Yet…this does not seem congruent. Were Terra truly lost to the Dark, he would not have entered the fight with a passion to protect another."

"But Eraqus didn't survive that fight," Mickey recalled. "Somethin' about that doesn't sit quite right."

"I can tell you what, to be precise," Yen Sid said. "Terra's goal was to protect Ventus. Eraqus' was to protect the worlds. Each thought he was doing what was best. What ensued, after they clashed, should have been a mutal understanding that the choice was difficult – even if it seems clear to us all that Ventus should have been the priority, as the worlds could be saved without his elimination. For either one to fall on that field means that there was a clash in which life itself was at stake. Which one of them progressed it to that level? Was it Terra? Or Eraqus? I thought I had known the answer…and yet now these facts do not add up."

"Why would Eraqus decide to fight Terra to the death?" Mickey asked. "You don't think…he was THAT invested in getting rid of Ven and the x-blade!"

"It is possible," Yen Sid admitted, "however much I do not wish to admit it. There is another option, of course. Xehanort was somehow involved. Perhaps he stepped into that battle and struck the final blow."

"VEN DIDN'T MENTION ANYTHING LIKE THAT," Papyrus said. "FROM WHAT I HEAR, WHEN THEY MET UP AT THAT GRAVEYARD PLACE, TERRA TOOK ALL THE BLAME."

"Then either Terra lost control," Mickey guessed, "or Eraqus…took it too far. But Terra was his apprentice! He was like Eraqus' son, and so was Ven!"

"There is another factor that chills me to the bone," Yen Sid admitted. "Do you recall that Terra failed his Mark of Mastery shortly before that duel, on the grounds that he failed to keep the Darkness in check? Eraqus is no friend to the Dark."

"MASTER YEN SID!" Mickey cried. "Are you sayin' Eraqus killed Terra 'cause the Mastery test showed him that Terra had powers he didn't like?"

"I am saying nothing definitive," Yen Sid explained. "We have so very little evidence. I only outline the new possibilities that have occurred given this information. I believe I know what course of action must be taken. The solution to nearly all problems is knowledge. We must learn the truth."

"And how're we gonna do that?" Mickey asked. "We can't just go back to that day and watch what happened. Terra would know, if we could save him, but we've got no idea how to do that just yet."

"Eraqus always kept detailed journals regarding his visits to other worlds," Yen Sid recalled. "With the restoration of the Land of Departure, some may yet be intact. We can read his writings in his own words and learn his philosophy at the time of the incident. Furthermore, we can use it as a map to retrace his steps. Much was learned about Ventus, Terra, and Aqua by connecting to those they had met on their journeys. If we can find those who connected to Eraqus, they may have revelations to share."

"That's a good plan!" Mickey realized. "Whaddaya say, Master Yen Sid? You'n'me, together like old times? It'll be like detective work!"

"I would be honored if you would accompany me on this journey, Mickey," Yen Sid said with a nod. "After all…the results of this investigation may hang heavy. You always were talented at helping others to smile, including your own self. I will admit this is not an easy journey. The company will make it more tolerable."

"No matter what happens," Mickey told him, "I'm here for ya."

"SHOULD I DO ANYTHING ELSE?" Papyrus asked. "DO YOU WANT ME TO GO WITH YOU?"

"No," Yen Sid said sharply. "I fear it would increase your anxiety. Furthermore…Ventus will need someone on his side who understands what he is going through. Hopefully, this journey should yield logic that proves he is more than worthy to exist, in a concrete way he can understand for good. If not, then he will need someone to believe in him and make up for where logic failed by understanding the heart. I believe you can be that someone, Papyrus. Furthermore, in Ventus' current mental state, what he may need more than anything else is levity."

"Yeah!" Mickey agreed. "Figure out somethin' you two can do together to cheer Ven up!"

"OUR OWN ADVENTURE!" Papyrus realized. "THAT IS A WONDERFUL IDEA! IT'S SO WONDERFUL, I REALLY SHOULD'VE THOUGHT OF IT. CAN WE PRETEND I DID?"

"I don't see the harm!" Mickey chuckled.

"Thank you for bringing this matter to our attention, Papyrus," Yen Sid concluded. "Had I only known, ten years ago…" He shook his head. "The past cannot be undone. All we can hope to do now is build a better future. For Ventus, and for Terra and Aqua as well. For if Eraqus were corrupt…it would have affected them both negatively also." He rose. "Leave this matter to Mickey and myself. You should return to the training grounds to give Ventus your support."

The meeting was adjourned. The laboratory was exited, its entrance once again camouflaged. And Papyrus rushed outside to see Ven happily sitting in a circle of his fellow students, ringing around Aqua as she told them all about her new girlfriend and last night's wonderful date.

Which meant that Riku, Goofy, and Roxas would get double ice cream.

...

"I'll warn you one last time," Aghoul said as he and Snatcher approached the rec room, which had only been discovered a couple of days ago. "I'm a KILLER carrom player. Turn back now if you don't have a death wish."

"Such words from a man who refuses to call it 'billiards,'" Snatcher replied. "And I don't think I will. If you weren't all talk, you wouldn't be trying to dissuade me, now, would you?"

But they were both out of luck, as the pool table was currently being used. By Ashley. To stand on as she kissed Grany Smisse, giving her the height advantage needed.

"Must we?" Snatcher sighed.

"I'm thinking 'tis time for death do them part from our table," Aghoul cackled.

"No way!" Grany snapped with a scowl. "We had this spot first!"

"If you don't like it, you can leave," Ashley purred.

"They can't snog atop that table forever," Snatcher whispered to Aghoul.

"We may as well wait it out," Aghoul agreed.

So they took up a different game at an unoccupied table. "What's this?" Aghoul lifted the table-tennis racket, tapping a crystal inset at the base. "Almost like the power sources they give weaponry."

"Purely aesthetic," Snatcher replied. "I simply don't see how a racquet would require – "

As he spoke, he bounced the small white ball on the table once, then sent it flying past Aghoul at incredibly high speed, with a small comet-tail of fire, until it dented the wall.

"…I do believe the Cyclonians figured out the REAL way to play this game!" Aghoul chortled.

It became somewhat harder to have a makeout session with two very excitable men playing table tennis with the equivalent of rocket fuel. So Ashley sighed, slumping down to kneel on the table. "It was fun while it lasted."

"Rémy said there's a new batch of mercenaries around who are good with blades," Grany told her. "Apparently they're also siblings, too. He'd wanted to spar with them. Want to come along?"

"No…I think I'll find something a little more glamorous to do."

So Grany departed, and Aghoul and Snatcher glared daggers at Ashley.

"Okay, fine," Ashley said with a pout, folding her arms and getting down from the table. "You can have your stupid pool table."

"Billiards," Snatcher corrected.

"Carrom," Aghoul said at the exact same time.

"Whatever," Ashley huffed.

"I feel sorry for you if that oaf is the same sort of kisser as his brother," Aghoul remarked. "His height and weight are enough to inspire a little suspicion. After all…size doesn't matter if you haven't perfected performance." A sly wink.

"Oh, Grany's a good kisser, all right," Ashley replied, turning to exit the rec room. "Though I get the feeling he skips brushing his teeth every now and again. But that's fine; it just makes his kisses taste like grilled chicken." She halted, tapping a fingernail against the door frame; "No. Not chicken. What was that animal he said he ate back home all the time? Gobball! He tastes like grilled Gobball."

With that, she left.

Aghoul needed a few moments to rack his brains as to where he'd heard that specific turn of phrase before, because he knew it was somewhere. When it finally clicked, he gave an immense gasp, wheezed it all back out, and collapsed on the floor, rolling with laughter and pounding his fists.

"Are you about to tell me what's so funny?" Snatcher asked.

"Oh, of course not!" Aghoul chuckled. "After all, if word starts getting out, it'll be USELESS as blackmail!"

...

The second door was installed next to the Fire Nation door. A card swiped. A red light illuminated.

It was a connection that had to be made for many reasons. But Aerith knew it affected one person more than most, and so had brought him for the grand moment.

"Are you ready?" she asked.

Lie Ren let out a sigh of anticipation. "I am. Please."

"Then go ahead and open it."

Ren's heart fluttered as he turned the handle of the bark-textured door and stepped right out of a tree, into the middle of a forest.

He walked a few paces, and then the great dragon's head came into view. His heart just about stopped, and nerves almost made him cut and run, but that would take him away from his entire reason for being the first to cross this threshold.

The group walked out of its jaws. "Anyway, we're going to the Vampire Slayers 3 midnight premiere," Chip Thorn told his friends. Vida's hand was clutched in his. "Anyone who wants to can come along. But we need from now until then to put together the cosplay."

"Dressing as a vampire's a real throwback," Vida chuckled. "Kinda wanna knock on Necrolai's door in full makeup just to see her freak before the show."

"Nah, I'm good," Nick said in the most disinterested tone he could manage.

"I've got a video chat set up with Operation Overdrive and the other temps minus Bridge this evening," Xander added. "Maybe if we put our heads together, we'll figure out something about why the Corona contingent would come here. Also, should just be a good time, maybe play some Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes. Mack's terrible at that game, which is funny given that he used to be full of wires and buttons at one point. I'm certain they wouldn't mind if any of you wanted to tap in."

"I might." Madison shrugged. "Don't have any real plans tonight. Thought I would just stay in. Vampire Slayers doesn't really interest me."

At this point, Ren realized he'd been watching from behind the trees for an almost stalkerish amount of time, frozen by his own shyness, and now the group was moving away from him. When they'd passed him, he forced himself to surge out, calling, "MADISON!"

She knew the voice. She froze, then turned around slowly. "Ren…"

"Hi." Ren was blushing furiously. "We, uh…we made a door from Radiant Garden to here. Now we can check in with each other. I mean, the original purpose was so we, the Radiant Garden faction, could check in with you, the Mystic Rangers, but also…now we as in you and me can check in, too."

"You came back for me." Madison approached Ren gently.

"I almost chickened out about five times on the way," Ren admitted.

"Are we still…?" Madison pointed from herself to Ren and back.

"As far as I know," Ren replied. "If that changed for you…"

"No," Madison said quickly. "No, it…can I kiss you?"

"…I'd like that."

Slowly, gently, they embraced, pressing lip against lip, and the "Aaaawwww!" coming from the other four Rangers only made the moment sweeter.

...

Because of Gwen's immense size, there had been two options. One was to shrink her down, but that would've removed a lot of the positives of having her on the team in the first place; her size was going to be an asset in battle. The other was to build her a set of chambers that belonged just to her, big enough to serve as a luxury apartment and not feel too constraining, with massive doors and plushy furniture.

Wuya had accepted the job for one reason and one alone: bigger rooms meant more to decorate. She'd invited Irmaplotz to come along and learned some rather juicy gossip about Draco Malfoy and Drake Stone, and then Tala showed up rather nervously and couldn't be turned away.

The basic interior was built. White walls. Necessities. Wuya, Tala, and Irmaplotz stood in the midst of the living room, admiring the giant abode they'd carved out.

"Now comes the fun part," Wuya said with a smirk.

"I can't thank you girls enough for doing this for me," Gwen said sweetly, testing out the couch that was perfectly sized for her.

"Don't," Wuya told her. "After all, it was mostly selfish on our part."

"We just wanted to get to do this bit," Irmaplotz clarified.

"Shall we?" Tala asked.

Wuya snapped her fingers. From nowhere, a dance beat began to throb into the chamber. "Let's go, girls," she declared.

She then spun to the beat, her hand arcing outward. Where it did, the walls were colored bright purple, as though Wuya had thrown paint at them. The gaps she missed, Irmaplotz filled in with a deep red, firing from an imaginary gun she held in pantomime.

Tala charged up both hands, held them high, and let the magic fly. The couch was now a deep midnight blue, with glittering stars woven into the fabric.

Wuya skated across the carpet as though wearing blades for ice, leaping in Lutzes, leaving a trail of purple in a perfect spiral. Irmaplotz filled in the white space with red by conjuring a giant crayon for coloring.

Tala was the first to hit the kitchen, using the pots and pans to ricochet her magic off each other and turn their silver into a deep bronze color. Wuya rode what appeared to be an ornately-woven magic carpet up onto the tabletop, where she parked it and it became a placemat. Irmaplotz turned the faucet gold, its handles clear and sparkling like diamond.

Tiles gained delicate patterns of creeping vines. The legs of the chairs and tables grew wooden talons. Then in the bathroom, white marble became jet-black and shining, all three sorceresses using the sink like a skateboard halfpipe as they brightened up the spigot. The toilet appeared to be made of silver now, with magically-generated gemstones set into its lid. An iridescent shower curtain cascaded down from the bar.

In the master bedroom, the bed was draped with plush blue blankets. There was a slight scuffle between Wuya and Irmaplotz about whether the sheets should be satin or fleece, resolved when Gwen said they had more than enough magic between them to hand her a set of each. Tala changed the ceiling lamp from design to design until finally settling on a stained-glass dome of varying blues.

"It's so wonderful," Gwen gasped as she looked at the art project unfolding around her. "How can I ever repay you?"

"I have a favor to ask," Irmaplotz said, causing Tala and Wuya to look at her in surprise.

"What is it, sweet little one?" Gwen asked.

"Look the other way," Irmaplotz told her. "When the time comes, you'll know what I mean."

...

Long black leather jacket, heavy eyeliner, boots that thudded hard on the wood floor – yes, Captain Hook was back to what felt truly right.

His first order of business was to locate the bar in the Forbidden Mountains, because if there wasn't any alcohol in this contract, he would have to do some strong negotiation. Luckily, it did exist, though it felt newer than the rest of the fortress. Probably placed there for Maleficent's guests rather than herself. It was sparsely populated. At the farthest end from the door, a muscle-bound man with intricate orange braids sipped white wine alone, trying not to engage socially with anyone. At the nearby jukebox – another amenity for guests – a silver-haired young man who wasn't unattractive was dancing by himself to a thick, throbbing dubstep tune. Behind the bar, a goon with the face of an alligator wiped out glasses with a rag.

Hook began by leaning against the jukebox, trying to catch the young man's eye. "That's some fancy footwork," he said with a glance down at said feet (and picking up some more sights on the way).

"Back off," Mercury Black snapped. "I'm in my zone, and if you break me out of my zone, I'll break your skull with my foot."

"Acknowledged," Hook said as he moved to sit down at the bar. He fired a casual wave to the other drinker. "Cheers."

Ganondorf gave a grunt that signaled he wanted to be left alone, then returned to his drink.

"Not exactly a lively place, is it, Goony?" Hook asked the alligator-faced goblin.

"My name's not Goony," the goblin replied.

"Then what is it?"

"…Maleficent never gave me a name," the goblin realized.

"Then I'm giving you one now," Hook told him. "Goony. Pour me a Dark & Stormy, will you?"

"Right away, sir!" Goony proceeded to fumble for two bottles.

"And go heavier on the rum than the ginger beer," Hook clarified.

"Yes, your smarminess!"

"Now, I like that." Hook smiled. Maybe the first real smile he'd given in…too long.

Another patron entered the bar, fuming. He hadn't come to drink, per se, but just to storm into whatever room was at the furthest reaches in a dramatic manner. "And HOW long does she expect me to remain on the sidelines?" he growled.

Hook had to look this man up and down twice. While his knee-jerk response would've been to say he was, in fact, bad-looking, his gut told him another look was needed, and now he liked what he was seeing. Tall. Slender, even more so than him. A warm brown tone to his skin; raven hair, if the beard was any indication. The rest was under that tall turban, which couldn't have looked any more sinister with any alterations, and Hook almost found himself jealous of the long red robes that matched it. See, that was how a villain dressed. Ganondorf and Mercury should take notes. And though this man's face was…unique, it had an expressiveness to it that kept Hook staring. Within the span of that one sentence, the brows, the curl of his lip, had conveyed about three flavors of angry.

There was really only one course of action to be had here. Hook leaned an elbow upon the counter, glancing up at the man with mischievous eyes. "Troubles, mate?"

"I am an all-powerful genie!" Jafar ranted, not really caring that he didn't even know who'd asked – only that someone had prompted him to rant. "I could challenge the gods on my own, let alone with the strength of numbers! I know secrets of the magical world Maleficent could only guess at in the dark! And yet I'm being kept as some sort of ace up the sleeve. What is the point of sending out the peons before the cream of the crop?"

"Sounds like you've had it rough," Hook replied. "Could I buy you a drink to ease your troubles?"

"Everything's free for Overtakers," Goony stated.

"I don't drink," Jafar scoffed.

"Water, then," Hook cajoled. "I'll buy you a tall, refreshing glass. You're the sort to know about tall drinks of water, after all."

"Water's free at all bars, I think," Goony piped up.

Jafar knew Hook was attempting to flirt. But of course, he couldn't deny that sort of attention. "Very well. A goblet, on your tab."

"There are no tabs," Goony attempted once more. "It's free."

Jafar sat down by Hook, who already had a very good feeling about where this encounter was going. "So," Hook asked, "what's your name, then?"

"Jafar," the other replied. "The phenomenally cosmic. And yourself?"

"Kil – " He flinched. "Just call me 'Captain Hook.'"

"Ah." Jafar grinned. "A vast improvement over our previous Captain Hook."

"I keep hearing about him," Hook brought up. "I get the sense he was sort of a buffoon."

"You don't know the half of it."

"I assure you, I am many things, but not a buffoon." The glasses arrived: one rum cocktail, one water.

"And what do you bring to our table?" Jafar asked.

"I can man a ship like no other," Hook told him. "I'm a skilled swordsman, and decent at the art of deception. After all, I'd just spent altogether too long convincing myself I'd gone the straight and narrow."

"That sounds utterly dreadful."

"I don't recommend it," Hook said as he took his first sip. "Been too long since I've committed an atrocity."

"What sort of atrocities is it you commit?"

"Mostly murder," Hook admitted, "but they've got to piss me off first. Thievery, of course. Comes with the territory of being a pirate. And the occasional sale or smuggle of contraband."

"I see," Jafar noted. "A rather base profession – but then again, it is refreshing for once to find someone below my level with no worry about competing egos."

"Hey!" Hook snapped. "I rather resent that!"

"I was the royal vizier," Jafar went on, "skilled in sorcery of every sort, with a vast collection of magical oddities that allowed me to do whatever I pleased, including using the Sultan as a puppet to carry out my will to the populace. I must say, I rather enjoyed giving the commands to hunt down the pettiest of thieves – there's a certain joy that comes from knowing I am so high above the abject. Looking down upon them and feeling reassurance that I'm nothing like them. Though they were fun to play with…but eventually, as all great men do, I wanted more. So I sought a genie to give me all I could ever wish in sorcerous and political power. And, in the end, the ability to control the universe."

"I know how genies work," Hook brought up. "Wouldn't that mean you got cuffed down inside of an oil lamp?"

"For a time," Jafar told him. "But as I soon found out when a wretch rubbed my lamp…it's almost worth it."

"So what do you do now?" Hook asked. "Murder?"

"Can't. And here you said you knew how genies worked. I can only cause fates WORSE than death."

The smile Jafar gave at this turn of phrase sent a shiver down Hook's spine. Yes, the man was an egomaniac. Yes, the man probably thought of him as gutter trash, but somehow, that sort of condescension was alluring. No, Hook didn't want to play the fool – but he did like a challenge, such as proving Jafar wrong. And listening to him speak was reminding him of everything he'd forbidden himself over the past few weeks.

"And Maleficent won't let you on the field despite that?" Hook asked. "Wonder if that's her problem. She wants her targets dead. You see things in a more creative light."

"A most astute way of putting it," Jafar told him. "If I didn't know you were attempting to seduce me, I might believe it."

Ah.

"Just because I'm attempting to seduce you doesn't make it a lie," Hook told him. "Perhaps I want to see if I can win you over by telling only the truth. Make the chase a little more exciting."

Jafar rolled his eyes. "A good deal more appealing than my last partner."

"Now, I'm always up for tales of exes past and the sins they committed," Hook said with a long swig of his drink. "I could write the book. But for now, let's focus on you."

"You call her an 'ex' as though it were a commitment of any sort," Jafar grunted. "That's the mistake she made. She was an amusement. Nothing more. Only not considered a 'toy' because she was a like mind in our goals. And now that she's a voiceless, half-blind wretch, she's so much more demanding, and I, so much less interested."

"Sounds disgusting," Hook told him. "One of the other Overtakers?"

"Yes. Her name is 'Cinder Fall.' Don't be fooled; she's a weakling in witch's clothing."

"So." Hook tapped his silver appendage on the table. "Is it…just women…?"

"Honestly, the woman was an anomaly," Jafar admitted. "Certainly she couldn't have won my heart, and her gender played a role."

"Is that saying men or is that saying none?"

"Why, a specific sort of man catches my eye more often than not," Jafar told him. "He's got to have a good pair of legs and a strong back. Dark hair; beautiful eyes. But most importantly, he's got to know the appeal of ME."

"And sever the connection when the sun comes up," Hook said. "Or at least not see it as anything more than it is."

"Indeed. But I believe I implied a question."

"Hardly at sea do I see a man so graceful as you," Hook told him. "You've got a better figure than most of the royals I've courted behind their fathers' backs. There's a spark in those eyes that goes well with the sharpness of your tongue. And if I might add, those fingers look quite flexible, giving me more than one idea."

"A good start, my pet." Jafar reached out to run the back of his hand against Hook's scruffy cheek, and Hook felt the shivers intensify. This was working out better than expected.

But as much as he thirsted for Jafar, he thirsted for someone to bring out the worst in him. Make him Captain Hook once more. "I might have more good things to say," Hook urged, "if you tell me more of your dark deeds committed."

"And I do so love to speak of them."

All in all, it seemed a beneficial arrangement. And that was all it was ever intended to be, at the start of it.

...

"So," Rémington asked as he and Grany walked alongside the Zerons down the hall, "are you three actually siblings, or is that just a catchy name?"

"We are united by our cause and desires," Omega replied sharply. "You can obviously see that we are from three different races."

"Yet we all agree on what we want to do to make our living," Alpha said with a toothy grin. "We found each other when we needed each other, and we decided…we were family, whether or not blood said so."

Beta nodded assent.

"Does he talk?" Grany asked.

"No," Alpha snarled. "Don't comment on it again."

"Well, as you can see," Rémington said quickly, "Grany and I are related, as is evident from our shared handsomeness. Of course, I am the handsomer one."

"You wish!" Grany spat.

"I fail to see how this is going to be a fair fight," Alpha said slyly. "Three against two…though to put it in your race's perspective, it will be more like fifteen against two."

"Hey!" Rémington snapped. "We may be humans, but we have the power of many Shushus on our side! The odds may be bad, yes, but they're bad for you, not us!"

"We're the most successful rogues in the World of Twelve!" Grany insisted.

"And we the most feared entities in our galaxy," Omega scoffed.

All of a sudden, a piercing shriek went up: "THE JACK-BOTS HAVE GONE ROOOOOOOOGUE!"

And, as advertised, a horde of a hundred Jack-Bots came zooming around the corner, guns out.

"Ah, perfect." Rémington smirked. "An opportunity."

"The siblinghood who destroys more wins," Alpha agreed.

They rushed into the fray.

Grany dispatched ten with one swing and another five on the backswing. Alpha cut down bot after bot with his dual discs, keeping them in flat mode for speed as he twirled and weaved. Beta extended neon grappling claws from his gloves, viciously grabbing bots out of the air and ripping them apart. Rémington leapt up on top of Beta's back while he was hunched over and used him as a vantage point to fire rapidly. However, what it took him multiple trigger pulls to destroy, Omega brought down an equal amount to simply by crouching down, flicking her tail, and letting loose a barrage of laser projectiles shaped like yellow razor blades.

"WE'RE LOSING!" Grany cried in horror. "I'm going to pull the emergency gambit!"

Rémington's eyes widened. "No no no don't YOU DARE – "

Grany planted his sword point in the floor before him, gripping the hilt.

"NOW you call on me," the Shushu inside groaned before the two fused.

A hulking demon, all red flesh with purple veins, shards of bone protruding from each joint and not two but five eyes set on his forehead – and one eye in the back of his head. With several strokes, he mashed no fewer than twenty Jack-Bots.

Jack Spicer himself came skidding around the corner with an "Eep!" before sighing; "Thanks, guys. For a second, I thought I'd just unleashed the actual apocalypse on – "

But now Grany was charging at him instead, and the boy screamed and turned to dash away as quickly as he could.

"Ugh…" Rémington gritted his teeth. "This always happens. He goes too far and lets the Shushu take over."

"How do we stop him?" Omega asked.

"Hit him in the extra eyes," Rémington said, twirling his pistols and getting ready to run. "But first, we have to make up the distance – "

Omega was bounding past him on all fours, flinging her laser razors. Grany's rearward eye noticed, and he leapt onto the wall and crouched down to avoid being pierced. Beta caught up to him, leaping onto his back to pin him to the wall, and as Grany struggled, this gave Alpha the chance to run around front, one disc transmuting into a three-pronged drill that surprisingly was perfectly proportioned for driving into that triad of eyes.

Which Alpha proceeded to do.

In the aftermath, a sword clanged onto the floor, and Grany, dazed but very human, sat beside it, rubbing his forehead. "I hate when that happens," he grunted.

"Oh," Rémington yelled, "you mean EVERY TIME?"

"Hey, at least we won!" Grany protested.

Rémington, now caught up to the others, looked Alpha dead in the eye. "Why do that? He's my brother, not one of yours."

"We understand. That is all." Alpha put away his discs. "And due to that circumstance, I feel in the right to say it wasn't a fair fight. We still need to settle this on the sparring field."

"Well!" Grany was on his feet in a jiffy. "You're on!"

...

In an open courtyard, Hook refamiliarized himself with the art of the sword, stabbing at imaginary opponents (most of whom were his visions of someone or another in the Charming family). His encounter with Jafar had been most gratifying indeed, but there was a time for pleasure and a time for business.

And he was getting down to business.

He flourished his sword as it was sheathed once more. "That should do it," he remarked. "Right. Then – "

"Hey!" a somewhat nasal voice cut in over the field. "Those were some sharp moves!"

Hook turned to see a pair of strangers approaching. Two young-looking men. One of them, with a dishwater-blond mullet and a hand extended up to wave in greeting. The other with auburn sideburns and a smirk that suggested he knew something Hook didn't.

"I'd thank you if this didn't reek of you wanting something out of me," Hook told them. "Out with it."

"We just heard there was a new member in our ranks," Hans said.

"With an ultra-cool mission," Demyx agreed. "Normally, I HATE going on adventures, but this one sounds like you're gonna do all the heavy lifting, soooooo…"

"Wait." Hook shook his head. "Who said anything about you coming along?"

Hans elbowed Demyx, hissing, "Should've let me do the talking like I asked!" Then he cleared his throat, putting on a saccharine smile. "Captain Hook. You know, I've had a bit of a past with Blackbeard, myself. The one from your world. As a matter of fact, I'm from your world, myself. The legends I've heard about you? Amazing. Just amazing. Though the fact that you are alive after all these years! I mean, I spent thirty of those in…Dem, what was that word Watts used?"

"Cryostasis," Demyx provided.

"In that," Hans went on, "but that is nothing compared to three centuries! That's literally a hundred times longer than my hiatus, and you were actually conscious for it!"

"Is this going somewhere?" Hook asked.

"Just that you and I share a common thread," Hans told him. "See, if I know about you, well, then I know about the Dark One, too. You can see where this might be going now."

"You've either got a grudge against him to carry out," Hook realized, "or you want the glory of bringing him down."

"He hurt me, you know," Hans said with a scowl. "What he took from me, I can never get back. All I can hope for is my revenge."

"And what was it he took…exactly?" Hook asked.

Hans paused. "…My brothers' respect for me?"

"Dude, you never had that," Demyx hissed. Hans elbowed him.

"Ah," Hook realized. "So it's the glory."

"No, it's – " Hans shook his head. "Fine. Yes. I want the bragging rights. My family still sees me as a laughingstock because I set out to capture one snow queen and ended up unleashing a second one. 'Did you check to make sure the urn was empty?' I need that to stop haunting me."

"Then why even go back home?" Hook asked. "Most everyone here isn't inclined to."

"Oh, I'm never going back again," Hans clarified, "but that doesn't mean the shame isn't following me. I need to clear it out with a bigger victory."

"And you?" Hook looked to Demyx. "What's your part in all this?"

"I'm just his boyfriend," Demyx replied. "And this sounds like fun."

"Sorry to disappoint," Hook told them, "but the crocodile's for me and me alone. My grudge. My revenge. My only regret being that I've got to turn him over to Maleficent alive, but I've been told that may change after the science team is through with him."

"But – but you don't understand!" Demyx sputtered. "Look what I can do!"

His sitar appeared in a rush of bubbles.

"You can play bardic ballads," Hook sighed. "That's not going to be – "

Demyx struck a chord, and Hook jumped back to avoid being swept up in a row of geysers of highly pressurized water.

"…An aquamancer," Hook realized. "All right, that might be useful under the correct circumstances." He looked to Hans. "What've you got?"

"The ability to talk my way into anything," Hans told him.

"Really?" Hook retorted. "Like into your family's good graces?"

Hans scowled.

"If your claim were true," Hook told him, "which I doubt, then you might be useful as far as getting TO the crocodile. But the capture belongs to me. I cannot make this any more clear."

"Crocodile," Demyx mused. "Now, that's a good insult. Catchy. Like it belongs in a song." He strummed a few notes, playing a tune that sounded oddly suspect, like rats in the walls running on rafters.

Hook just looked at him in amazement and disappointment as he began to chant, "Kidnap Mr. Crocodile? I wanna do it!"

"Don't be vile," Hans broke in.

"I don't think we should work together – " Hook attempted.

"But we're three of a kind!" Hans and Demyx insisted. "Birds of a feather! Now and forever! WHEEEEEE!"

They began to prance about, singing an interlude of "La-la-la-la-la-la!", and Hook rolled his eyes and realized he had to go with this.

He joined in to sing with them: "Kidnap the crocodile; lock him up real tight! Throw away the key and then turn off all the lights!"

Already having a plan formulated, Hook described it: "The sea witch, she will be the bait. I know where we can go and wait. And when he comes in searching, we can lock the doors and close the gate."

"Wait!" Demyx broke in. "I've got a better plan to catch this silly scaly man! I'll strum him up a boiling pot, and when he's done, we'll butter him up!"

Well, the only way to get control of his plan back was to play along with the music, so Hook joined the other two again: "Kidnap the crocodile! Throw him in a box! Bury him for ninety years, then see if he talks!"

After a few hard strums, Hook pleaded, "I don't suppose you'd let a man…" A few more chords. "Just have his revenge alone, then?" The same note pattern: "If that's the case, I do declare…that MAYBE we can share."

Demyx was now hopping on the balls of his feet; "I say that we take a cannon, aim it at his door, and then knock three times, and when he answers, Crocodile will be no more!"

"You're so stupid! THINK!" Hook yelled. "Now, if you blow him up to smithereens, then I don't get my final blow and I WILL beat you black and green!"

The triad walked around in a circle, singing once more, "Kidnap the crocodile! Tie him in a bag! Throw him in the ocean, then see if he is sad!"

Demyx and Hans leaned on each other to quietly sing, "Because this new Captain Hook seems like the meanest guy around! If I were on his nasty list…I'd get out of town!"

Putting on his most winning smile, Hans cajoled to Hook, "You'll be so pleased by our success…" He waited for the proper chords. "That you'll reward us too, I bet!"

After playing the necessary notes, Demyx gasped; "Perhaps he'll make a pirate crew –

"OUT OF ME AND YOU!" Demyx and Hans cried, looking at each other with wide eyes.

Instead of shooting them down right away, Hook decided to let them have a little more fun, joining in as the three sang: "We're all nasty villains, and we take our job with pride. We do our best to do our worst and stay on the Dark side!"

Hook then sighed, shaking his head; "I wish my cohorts weren't so dumb."

"I'm not the dumb one!" Hans protested.

"You're no fun," Demyx said sullenly.

"Shut up!" Hook scoffed.

"MAKE ME!" Demyx challenged.

So Hook did, stamping down a heavy footstep to advance right up to Demyx's face; "Now I've got the final word, for I've had this plan from the start! I know where he is going and I know just how to stop his heart! Though…aquamancy is of use, and I suppose diplomacy could make this job go faster, yes – "

"And then we'll have him!" Hans cried. "One, two, three!"

In three-part harmony, they belted, "Kidnap the crocodile; beat him with a stick! Lock him up for ninety years, see what makes him tick! Kidnap the crocodile; chop him into bits! Maleficent's scientists are sure to get their kicks!"

And Hook had to admit he was having the slightest bit of fun once they changed key for the final reprise: "Kidnap the crocodile! See what we will see! Lock him in a cage and then throw – a-way – the keeeeEEEEEEEY!"

Jack and Irmaplotz crept into Gwen's massive apartment, sneaking along like rats in the kitchen.

"Shhhh!" Irmaplotz hissed, noting Gwen at the sink, washing the china that had been intricately painted by sorceress hands. "Don't tip her off!"

"I won't!" Jack hissed right back.

They scuttled all the way into her bedroom, then used a rope ladder that Irmaplotz had conjured to climb aboard the Gorbon-sized bed.

"You weren't kidding!" Jack realized. "This thing is huge!"

"Isn't it perfect?" Irmaplotz asked. "Now we can do the one thing a pair of teenagers in love always wants to do with a giant soft bed!"

"Yesssss!" Jack pumped his fist.

And in unison, they began to bounce on the mattress like it was a trampoline, whooping and yelping as they saw how high it could launch them.

Gwen heard them by that point, of course, but it was then that she understood what Irmaplotz had meant by "look the other way," so she continued to wash the dishes while the two started doing flips and trick jumps.

...

Isaac "Felix" Gates liked being able to take off his armor for the sake of comfort. What he didn't like was how everyone's perception of him changed as soon as he did. Because he could pretend to be anything under it, but out of it, he was quite obviously a short, reedy man with hair that couldn't settle between brown and blond. Not exactly what women wanted.

But that didn't stop him from trying to play Casanova.

He found three lovely women having a discussion in one of the lounges. Scarlet Overkill was eating from a lunchbox she had perched on her lap. "Aren't you gonna eat yours?" she asked Ravess.

"No." Ravess kicked her box across the room. "Vexen already tipped me off. These are tainted so Yzma can figure out which potion is which."

"He's just making that up," Scarlet told her. "Yzma might be underhanded, but she wouldn't use her friends as human test subjects."

Neo shook her head, giving a silent sigh.

"Ladies!" Isaac greeted as he entered the room. "You're all looking lovely today. I just have one question: do you believe in fuckability at first sight or do I have to walk by you again?"

Neo leaned back her head to give a noiseless groan of disgust.

Scarlet held up her left hand, pointing to a ring. "Married."

"That doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother you," Isaac told her.

"You better believe it bothers me," Scarlet seethed.

Neo, in the meantime, was scribbling something down on a notepad. She handed off a folded note to Isaac, who opened it up to read the words "I HAVE A DICK"

"Oh," Isaac realized. "No offense, but I'm not exactly into that. Somebody'll come along who wants to tap that, though!"

Neo was at least relieved that was enough to chase him off; otherwise, her next plan was to start the stabbing.

"Sooooo…what about you?" Isaac gave Ravess a coy glance.

"Me?" Ravess swallowed hard. "Why, I…I'm taken, of course. Don't even attempt!" Her cheeks flushed pink.

"What is it with non-Herb straight men?" Scarlet groaned. "The way you talk, you make it like sex is all there even is to get out of a relationship!"

"Um." Isaac tilted his head at her. "Is there something else I SHOULD want?"

"COMMITMENT!" Scarlet snapped at him. "LOVE! DEVOTION! SOMETHING besides just noticing how tight my dress is!" She squirmed. "Huh. That's weird. It actually is tight – "

So she flexed. And the eight tarantula legs she'd sprouted thanks to Yzma's potion sample burst out of her back in a cyclone of red fabric.

"OKAY, GEEZ, I GET IT!" Isaac screeched, hurtling out of the room. "MARRIED AND A FREAK!"

Ravess watched him go almost wistfully. She'd wanted to inquire a little more into his relationship philosophies.

"…So I guess I'm having a talk with Yzma." Scarlet rose, clutching her bodice onto herself as she headed out.

Ravess turned to see Neo regarding her with a look that carried an air of suspicion. "What is it?" Ravess asked.

Neo tilted her head.

"You think I'm hiding something, is that it?" Ravess replied. "I'll have you know there's NOTHING I won't have aired!"

Neo's next expression prompted whether or not Ravess really meant that.

"I MEAN IT!" Ravess snapped. "I just – I was interested in his philosophy and what brought him to that conclusion that sex is…is so important. After all…" Her voice dropped to a resentful mutter. "I seem to be getting along just fine without it."

Neo's eyebrows shot up.

"Whatever you think you've concluded," Ravess said sharply as she rose, "IT. IS. WRONG."

And then she stormed away, leaving Neo alone to play games on her scroll and wonder if what she suspected about Ravess was actually the case.

...

The aquarium staff shouldn't have seen any of the three coming. It was a stealth mission, first and foremost. However, Hans and Hook were already blowing that with their argument:

"I DIDN'T REALIZE IT WAS YOUR BOAT!"

"WELL, YOU SURE MADE YOURSELF RIGHT AT HOME IN IT, DIDN'T YOU?"

"I WOULDN'T HAVE IT IF YOU HADN'T TRADED IT FOR THAT WOMAN!"

"AND YOU THINK I WANTED IT TO GO TO THE HANDS OF SOMEONE WHO THINKS MURDER CONSISTS OF LOCKING SOMEONE IN A ROOM AND WAITING FOR THEM TO DIE OF THE COLD? NOT TO MENTION IF YOU'D JUST KISSED HER, YOU COULD'VE GOTTEN AWAY WITH CLAIMING YOU'D JUST MET TOO FAST AND SHE WOULDN'T'VE SUSPECTED!"

"THAT IS – " Hans froze, turning cherry red. "That is NOT – I needed to not kiss her. I NEEDED to tell her the scheme. That part was IMPORTANT!"

"Uhhhh, guys?" Demyx broke in. "Your local recon expert here suggesting you maaaaaybe wanna tone it down now that we're within radius. Geez, we took a big enough risk flying in on a pirate ship in the first place. I don't know what's worse: if the cops find it where we parked it, or if they see that we didn't put any munny in the meter."

"Very well," Hook huffed. "The prince can give me back my ship later."

"Whoa now," Hans argued. "It's legally mine. You sold it, Blackbeard purchased it, and I…uh…inherited it…from him?"

Hook was about to complain when Demyx leaned up to him with an index finger extended and simply said, quite coldly, "DON'T. START."

That was how Hook learned the universal truth that the other Overtakers already knew: the seemingly laid-back and whimpering Demyx deciding to get serious was one of the most frightening phenomena among the group.

"…All right," Hook grumbled. "Now follow my lead."

They wandered among the dark rooms with illuminated tanks of various tropical and exotic sea creatures making up their glass walls. Demyx was now staring sparkly-eyed like a child in a candy store, which really just made him even creepier as far as Hook was concerned, and Hans nodded in approval at some of the more colorful fish. But Hook was more concerned with hunting octopus.

He knew, based on an employee schedule, that the "AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY" door he'd just come upon was the right one. So he elbowed Hans; "Now might be a good time for some sweet talk. Don't let them notice me getting through that door."

"You got it," Hans whispered. He then turned to the nearest staff member; "Excuse me, sir, I'm thinking about getting an aquarium of my own and I'm wondering if any of these species do well domesticated!"

He steered himself so the employee would have to turn his back to the door in order to answer the question. And Hook quickly, quietly stepped through.

It was difficult to believe that the woman who stood at the upper edge of the shark tank, tossing in dead fish with an expression that much matched that of the corpses she dumped, was a version of the Ursula that Hook had met back in the Forbidden Mountain. Though their interaction had been brief, he'd thought that one much more deserving of the title of "sea witch," maybe even "goddess." This Ursula, the one he'd met first and had a sordid history with, was a cowardly slip of a woman with no meat on her bones, and it seemed that when Hook had taken her singing voice away via magic, her ability to speak up for herself had gone with it. Or maybe it had never been there.

"Ursula," he greeted as he approached. "It's been a while."

Ursula froze. Straightened up, glaring venomously. "What are YOU doing here?" she growled. "I thought I left you behind years ago."

"Well, I'm making up for lost time," Hook told her. "Though I should ask what YOU'RE doing here. The daughter of Poseidon, throwing chum to the sharks for the amusement of the peasants? I didn't expect you to fall so far."

"I wouldn't be here if you hadn't taken my singing voice from me," she seethed.

"Plenty of people aren't able to sing, mate," Hook responded. "Doesn't stop them from achieving things. What I'm noticing is an utter lack of ambition. At the least, I'd heard word Cruella was running a ring of white-collar crime."

(He'd been tempted to look her up, but the Overtakers already had one, and it seemed six of one, half dozen of the other.)

"What do you want?" Ursula spat.

"Simple," Hook responded as he grew closer to her. "The Dark One."

"Why would you ask ME about him?"

"Because he's coming to find you," Hook hissed, "and attempt to recruit you to invade a small town that contains the sum total of the Enchanted Forest's population for reasons I don't think even he understands. But I need to stop that from happening."

"You actually care about the people of that town?" Ursula scoffed skeptically.

And she was right to, for Hook replied, "No. I care about taking the Dark One prisoner, and delivering him to a new benefactor…who is yet again a FAR superior version of a former associate of yours."

"And how do I factor in?"

"Well, you see." Hook was now right up close to Ursula, whispering in her ear. "If I'm going to pull this off…I need you to not be in my way."

In one fluid motion, he grabbed her, throwing her into the shark tank she'd been feeding, then tipped the bucket of dead fish right after her. She splashed and struggled by instinct, catching the attention of the sharks.

Faint screams were heard from the visitors' side as the water ran red.

"Damn," Hook muttered. "It's been too long since I've done something that satisfying."

On the furthest end of the aquarium, an older man regarded the scorpionfish and how it changed color to blend in with the various parts of its tank. To every fish that regarded it, it appeared slightly different – a new palette each time, even if only subtly. But did a scorpionfish then have any sense of its own true colors, of what it would look like if all pretenses were dropped?

He, himself, looked quite unremarkable. Long honey-colored hair fell around his face and was trimmed to match about the length of his chin. He wore a perfectly ordinary suit, black with a red tie. Both hands were perched atop a cane that rested in front of him, allowing him to keep his weight off a particular foot.

"Well, well. We meet again."

The voice made his heart beat cold.

Mr. Gold turned slowly to see Hook standing behind him, grinning smugly. "Waiting on someone?" the pirate asked, extending his arms. "Is it me you're looking for, perchance?"

"What do you want?" Gold spat. Remembering that the last time their paths had crossed, he'd had Hook wrapped around his little finger. That last he'd heard, Hook had renounced the ways of the villain in order to get his happy ending. The way Gold couldn't seem to bring himself to do no matter how much fate directed him that way.

Instead of answering, Hook took a look around the aquarium for show. "Lots of water in this building," he pointed out. "Would be tragic if an aquamancer should break in. He'd have too much ammunition."

On cue, the shattering of glass, the sound of sitar-string chords, and a wall of solid water appeared to block Gold and Hook off from the rest of the world.

"Ah," Gold realized. "So it's an ambush. Still upset about the Sorcerer's Hat, are we?"

"No," Hook spat. "I'm upset about Milah. I'm UPSET that you took everything away from me the day you killed her." He began to pace the perimeter. "Though perhaps, I should thank you. After all…you made me what I am today."

"A lovelorn peasant who can't renounce his wicked ways no matter how hard he tries?" Gold asked.

"I don't need to," Hook informed him. "I just needed to renounce that 'love.' And it's rather funny to me. Without Swan insisting you need to stay alive to be Henry's grandfather or whatever makes you so valuable to her…I see no need to honor our little peace treaty."

"Even though I am Baelfire's father?" Gold spat. "Does that mean nothing to you?"

"Baelfire is dead," Hook hissed. "And despite all I've done, that blood is on YOUR hands."

"Don't go blaming me for Zelena's tantrums," Gold snarled.

"Let's just get to the good part of the story," Hook suggested, taking a stand and drawing his rapier. "I've got a new benefactor, and she wants you brought in alive. After what I can only assume will be some horrifying experiments that cause you a good deal of pain, she will then release you back to me, and I'll finish the job I started when Cora turned my hook into your death. And this time, there'll be no two-sided candles to use to corrupt an innocent into taking the shot for you, will there?"

Gold was beginning to sweat. He backed up only to hit the glass wall immediately. "I've no magic here," he pleaded. "This won't be gratifying for you in the least. One stroke of the sword and it'll be over."

"At least try and humor me," Hook asked. "I think you'll enjoy that more, too, however slightly."

Then he rushed Gold with his blade, slashing sharply through the air. Gold instinctively raised his cane to parry, meaning he stumbled back on his bad foot and nearly crumpled to a knee. When Hook made his second strike, he actually did fall to a knee while parrying, and the third forced him to both knees.

"You're right," Hook sighed. "This isn't as fun as I'd hoped. Might as well get it over with."

His sword was sheathed. And from his leather coat, he drew out what appeared to be a child's toy water pistol.

"Classy," Gold told him snidely.

"I don't understand how this is merely a child's toy," Hook told him. "Seems there are a lot of good uses for it. Such as if you mix magic-repelling squid ink with a knockout potion and you need a way to discharge it at a target."

And then Gold was sprayed in the face with exactly that.

He toppled, his last view of Hook's approaching boots as he hit the floor hard and blacked out.

...

"All right, everyone!" Scarlet Overkill clapped her hands together atop the karaoke stage. "We've got some new faces here at improv club! Why don't we do introductions?"

"There's nothing new about THAT face," Quentin Beck said as he gestured toward Yzma.

"Why, you UNGRATEFUL little – " Yzma shook a bony fist in his face. "HOW ABOUT I MAKE YOUR FACE NOT-NEW?"

"…What?" Quentin flinched. "What does that even mean?"

"Aren't you the fishbowl guy?" Roman realized.

"FISHBOWL GUY?" Quentin gasped, pretending to be utterly offended. "HOW DARE YOU! I HONE MY VILLAIN SKILLS FOR – " A quick count. " – A YEAR AND A HALF AND ALL I GET FOR IT IS 'FISHBOWL GUY'?"

"Yeah, you just made that your name now," Roman declared.

Dmitri let out a snort.

"Laugh while you can, No-Face," Roman told him.

"You think I wasn't prepared for that one?" Dmitri replied with a grin.

"I don't reckon you'll be able to shake that one," Snatcher told Roman. "He's not got the histrionic airs about him that Mr. Beck does – "

"I DO NOT HAVE HISTRIONIC AIRS ABOUT ME!" Quentin yelled. "I EAT, SLEEP, AND BREATHE HISTRIONIC! HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST ANYTHING LESS?"

"…I'm not sure what to do with that response," Snatcher admitted.

"Dude, chillax!" Herb urged. "We're just here to have fun. You can get histrionic in a minute."

"So the first game we're going to do is 'film dub,'" Scarlet stated. "Which I think we can all do now that everyone in the audience knows what a film is. Usually, this is in pairs, but we've got an even six, we can do three and three. Snatcher, Roman, Herb, you three get up on the stage."

As the aforementioned climbed up to the stage, Scarlet told them, "You three are gonna act out a fake scene. Just talk in gibberish and do random things. And YOU three – " She gestured to the audience. "Are going to 'translate' what they say."

"I know how to play film dub," Quentin snorted, folding his arms.

"Okay, so…" Scarlet thought it over. "Yzma, you be Roman. Quentin, you be Snatcher. Dmitri, you can voice Herb."

"Oh, this is going to be DELICIOUS," Roman chuckled.

"I need a premise from the audience," Scarlet stated. "Anyone who – "

"Herbert is slowly dying of poison administered to him by a mysterious villain," Quentin sighed, as though this were a routine trope, "and Roman, who secretly loved him all along, is confessing. Snatcher, Roman's current beau, is attempting to console him, but was actually the one who poisoned Herbert when no one was looking."

"…Okay!" Scarlet cried. "We'll go with that! Start whenever!"

Herb immediately fell to the floor, pressing the back of his hand to his head.

"Ooh, I've been poisoned!" he said out loud. "If only I knew the name of the foul blackguard who had killed me so slowly; then I could have my final revenge!"

"Uh, Herb, honey?" Scarlet broke in. "You're not supposed to, you know, actually talk – "

"I didn't say anything," Herb told her.

Right before his voice sounded, "Oh, I'm sorry. Is this too confusing?"

Everyone looked at Dmitri in awe.

"What can I say?" he teased in Herb's voice. "I have a gift."

The scene continued. Roman dropped to his knees, saying some very passionate nonsense as he picked Herb up to cradle him in his arms.

Yzma, panicking and unable to think of anything to say, shouted out, "GREEN BEANS!"

This got a host of laughter for all the wrong reasons.

Snatcher placed a hand on Roman's shoulder, telling him a very soft "Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah."

"All things must end," Quentin said loudly and dramatically, "all cycles begin anew. Death is but the closing of one door and the opening of another, to birth; from the ashes rises the phoenix. Would that I only knew who had done such a foul deed; I would slaughter him with my own two hands! MAYBE I would even use…poison."

Snatcher winked at the dub trio.

Roman turned to retort with a "Wah wah wah wahhhh."

"I'm…sad," Yzma said, "and, uh, angry…and…aaaahhhh…hungry for green beans."

"WILL YOU LET GO OF THE GREEN BEANS?" Quentin yelled.

Herb made several choking sounds, followed by Dmitri saying in a perfect imitation of his voice, "You reminded me…I never got a decent last meal…please…won't you bring me…a bagel from the corner deli before I go?"

Snatcher gave a few more "blah"s that Quentin translated as "A tainted bagel is what got you in that mess in the first place."

Roman couldn't have more clearly been trying to say "Wait. How do you know that?", but Yzma supplied "I thought it was green beans."

"NO MORE GREEN BEANS!" Quentin yelled out of turn.

That was when Montana decided to use the room as a shortcut, not knowing who was already present. When he took note of the club, he nodded; "Don't mind me." And began to cross the room.

Snatcher said two words.

But Quentin was a man on a mission. "ALL RIGHT, I ADMIT IT!" He stood up, throwing out his arms. "I WAS THE ONE WHO POISONED HIM! AND IT WAS ALL FOR YOU, TO CAPTURE YOUR HEART! I KILLED FOR LOVE, AND I'D DO IT AGAIN, ONCE, TWICE, A THOUSAND TIMES! ANYONE WHO LOVES YOU, ANYONE WHO LOOKS AT YOU, ANYONE WHO HARMS YOU, I WILL MURDER WITH MY BARE HANDS! CAN YOU NOT SEE HOW VALUABLE YOU ARE TO ME, AS THOUGH YOU ARE THE SUN AND THE MOON IN ONE?"

He couldn't have been more obviously trying to get attention. Whether Montana's or not, Montana wasn't sure. But he didn't respond. He kept his head down. Kept moving. Because if Quentin thought he wanted to talk to him, he wasn't ready for what was about to hit the fan when he had to come clean about his role in the Symbiote incident.

Quentin watched Montana breeze out the other door, then simply stared after him forlornly. How could that display not have worked? Didn't Montana see how wonderful of an actor he was, with overtones of the themes of dark and forbidden love carried out with foul deeds?

Roman turned to Snatcher, and his nonsense line was simply "Wada faaaaah?"

Which Yzma translated as "What the green beans?"

...

The sun sparkled off the waters of the Radiant Garden beach. Sitting in the sand, Aqua couldn't help but admire the light as she looked out to the horizon.

"It's just like…" She cut herself off.

"Like what?" Moana urged, nudging her with an elbow from one side. "Maybe…Rosalina's eyes?"

"I wasn't going to say – " Aqua turned pink. "I'm not OBSESSED."

"It's fine to be, you know!" Katara said from her other side. "I'm not sure how I didn't see it before. You two match up great!"

"We came here to spend a day getting closer to our element," Aqua muttered. "I've already spent way too long talking about my date. We can talk about something else now, like the ocean."

"What if I want to know if you have a second date scheduled?" Katara asked.

"So do I!" Moana agreed.

"…We don't have the time or place," Aqua said shyly, "but we're definitely doing this again. It's…funny. I never thought…" She was fiddling with her short hair. "After a while, I was starting to think romance wasn't for me. We were never encouraged to pursue it in the first place. Work came first. And…well, you already know why else I hesitated."

"Which is why you now live with the FUN team," Moana told her.

"It's something important Aang taught me," Katara stated. "Something he taught all of us. Without having fun, the world is just so…bleak. If you and Rosalina are having fun dating, then you need to keep doing it so there's something else to focus on besides…all the bad."

"And if I remember right," Moana said, "you have had a LOT of bad already, so it's about time things turned around."

Aqua smiled softly. "You're right. Any reason to smile is valuable. Especially her. She's so wonderful."

Moana's gaze was drawn upward first; "What's that?"

Something falling from the sky like a shooting star. Twinkling blue.

"Something's falling?" Aqua stood to get a better look.

"I don't think that's a something," Katara realized. "It looks like a someONE!"

The figure plummeted deep into the water, far away from the shore.

"WE GOTTA HELP THEM!" Aqua was already charging into the waters, with Moana and Katara in close pursuit.

But the Ocean raised a wave to stop them, and Moana understood; "She says it's okay."

"HOW is this OKAY?" Katara cried. "Somebody just fell out of the sky into really deep water! A normal human wouldn't – "

It was then that the waters were disturbed by the figure rising, gracefully swimming up to the surface, then prying herself up out of the water to stand on its very surface. Unsurely, she looked at the trio that was there to greet her.

"Hi," she said curtly.

Neither Katara nor Aqua recognized the blue woman with deeper-blue hair, clothed in a crop top and sweatpants. But Moana did; "LAPIS?"

Back on the beach, the four traded introductions. Then Moana asked, "Why did you come back? I thought you had to be home."

"Home was struck," Lapis stated. "I think it had something to do with the people that hurt this city. Our leader, White Diamond, was taken hostage. She may or may not already be shattered. I couldn't stay away from this. I know I can make a difference somehow, and here seemed like the best way to start."

"I like your initiative," Aqua said with a smile. "All right. Let's go back. We'll get you set up."

"And we'll find out what happened to White Diamond," Katara vowed.

"I already know it's not gonna be that easy," Lapis sighed. But when the other three began to move to the train station, she followed – casting one last glance to the cove where she'd sheltered her barn. Back when she still had a barn, before Flurious and his had come along.

They said Steven had a hard time dealing with changes. Lapis should've been used to them by now, but clearly, that assessment was incorrect.

...

Mozenrath's cape billowed as he stormed down into the laboratory, past all the workstations and into the med bay. "Whatever this 'amazing innovation' you called me down here to see is better be GOOD, Vexen!" he growled. "I was in the middle of compiling a – "

He turned into the bay filled with cots to find himself looking at his double. "Hello!" the other Mozenrath said, waving.

The real Mozenrath was gobsmacked for a few seconds. Then, with a rising growl: "VeeeexEEEEEEN!"

"What?" Vexen stepped out of the shadows. "You don't like it?"

"You REPLICATED me?" Mozenrath cried. "That wasn't in the plan! Why did I run around collecting souls from dark crystals and memories from databases if you were going to make ME?"

"Calm yourself," Vexen told him. "This isn't a replica. Chameleon-Bot, demonstrate."

The false Mozenrath reached out to seize the real one's left wrist. "This is the one that still has flesh on it, right?" the fake asked, all too excitedly. "Okay, tell me! Does this hurt?"

His grip tightened. And it was definitely a hand made of metal and mechanisms.

"Ow, ow, OW!" Mozenrath cried as his arm was compressed in the fake's grip. "I get it! IT'S A ROBOT!"

"And now you see the TRUE method behind our madness!" Now Drakken had revealed himself.

"WHY A ROBOT?" Mozenrath was trying to swat the fake away. "YOU LET GO OF ME THIS INSTANT, OR ELSE I'LL – "

"SORRY!" The fake backed away, wide-eyed. "I don't want to get murdered on my first day, even if I can be put back together! That would just be so…anticlimactic!"

"There is a replica body stewing," Vexen informed Mozenrath, "but it will take some time. I chose one of the…lesser souls, as it is only a control to ensure I still have the skills I require for the jobs that matter. Should it succeed, it may be a useful ally. Should it fail, there is no great loss. However, there was one project we could complete much, much sooner."

"Show him what you can do!" Drakken urged with a great grin. "Go on, go on, SHOW HIM!"

"All right!" The fake smiled in a way that was too sweet to possibly belong to Mozenrath. "Who should I do? Oh, I know!"

The surface of "Mozenrath" broke open, revealing itself to be several intricately-fit metal panels. They reassembled, the gears beneath whirring frantically. New parts were manufactured from a miniature forge within, creating another appearance entirely – even adding height to the skeletal frame. From a chamber that gave off the distinct sound effect of a sewing needle at ten times the normal speed, thread spooled out and was woven into fabric.

Now Mozenrath was looking at a second Vexen. "How's this?" the fake asked, in a perfect replication of Vexen's voice.

"Wonderful," Vexen said smugly.

"The Chameleon-Bot was an old project of Jack Spicer's," Drakken revealed. "He'd already filled in most of the base technologies to be able to reflect a person's appearance, but I have streamlined them for quicker changes! Also, the original model had zero voice capabilities. Thanks to the AI that Vexen and I but mostly I have programmed, the new model can now mimic voices as well!"

"How wonderful," Mozenrath groaned. "A shapeshifter. Because we don't already have at least four of those…who, judging by recent contradictory accounts, I suspect of stealing my identity recently."

"Yes, well, they're all flesh," Drakken reminded him. "MY creation (that Vexen happened to have a minor hand in) is solid metal! She can be disassembled, broken down, and reconstructed an endless amount of times! She's immortal!"

Mozenrath debated on whether he wanted to ask about the obvious cue Drakken had given. He was almost ready to let it go, but then realized he was asking anyway; "It's a she?"
"Those are the pronouns I prefer," Chameleon-Bot said. "After all, my AI is based on the memories of a real person. It's mostly complete, so I more or less am her, and she had such a colorful career, I'm happy to step in! Though I wish her face hadn't looked so plain. It has to be the face I wear when I'm not cosplaying, you know. Also, for obvious reasons, the file was missing her moment of death, and it makes me a little frustrated, because that's an obvious turning point in her story arc. My story arc now, I suppose!"

"There's…too much to unpack here," Mozenrath said, palms out. "She has real memories?"

"Well, we didn't want another Bebe incident," Drakken told him, "so yes. We gave her a more realistic personality for better compatibility."

"Of someone from the Academy for Gifted Juveniles?" Mozenrath put together.

"There was one whose profile exactly fit the specifications for a revamped Chameleon-Bot," Vexen revealed. "Ironically…the one who we wouldn't even have needed memory files to bring back. All the same, had we simply returned her to the flesh as she was, she would not have been as tactically useful as the new and improved Chameleon-Bot."

"And she calls her shapeshifting COSPLAY?" Mozenrath cried.

"Yes!" Chameleon-Bot answered. "It was something I – or the person I'm based on – used to do as a pastime! She could get very accurate, but I can now get even more accurate, down to the exact curves of the face!"

"Okay, just – " Mozenrath waved a hand at her. "Stop saying that in Vexen's voice with Vexen's face. It's too out of character."

"I'm acting OOC?" Chameleon-Bot replied. "I had thought this was an OOC moment anyway, but I can definitely revert from muse to mun if you want!"

More shifting. The discarding of some of the metal pieces, making a shorter, thinner frame. A woman. Long blue hair that cascaded down her back. A navy-blue uniform with a button-down jacket and a neat bow tie. A pair of glasses settled before eyes that changed LEDs to a soft gray color.

"You don't need the glasses, you know," Drakken told her.

"I know," Chameleon-Bot replied, "but the cosplay wouldn't be accurate if I didn't have them, even if they do contribute to a rather ugly face."

Mozenrath couldn't see, from an objective perspective, how there was anything ugly about the woman, but then again, he didn't really care, and she annoyed him for other reasons, so maybe she was ugly and he just didn't care to take note of it.

"Though now may be a good time to ask," Chameleon-Bot said. "Can I get you all to call me by her name instead of 'Chameleon-Bot'? I am her, now, and I'd like to be addressed as a person instead of having to hear such a potentially robophobic name. It's so funny – I made up robophobia as a character trait to make Keebo more interesting, and now I finally understand why it irked him so much! …Besides the fact that I engineered his personality that way."

"We are not going to indulge – " Vexen began.

"Of COURSE we can call you by your name, sweetie!" Drakken told her, as though speaking to a daughter. "However you identify and want us to refer to you is perfect by me!"

"…I suppose we're using the mole's name for her, then," Vexen sighed. "Remind me what it is."

"Tsumugi!" Chameleon-Bot, who was now Tsumugi, answered. "Tsumugi Shirogane. Such a plain name for a plain woman, I know. But I am too dedicated to the part to hear anything that sounds catchier for television! It may be an ugly name, but it's my name!" She beamed.

"One last question," Mozenrath sighed. "Why bring back the cutesiest girl you could find? Does she even have the spine for the WHAM ARMY?"

"I think you're trying to flatter me by saying I'm 'cutesy,'" Tsumugi replied. "Hmm." She turned back to Vexen and Drakken. "Do you have around sixteen dead-weight members you don't need? More or less is fine, but sixteen is ideal."

"No, sweetie," Drakken said sternly, "you're not going to orchestrate a killing game in this house. And no mind-wipes to write new characters into their bodies, either!"

Tsumugi pouted, visibly disappointed.

"Besides," Vexen told her, "all our members at this point are chosen with precision. To eliminate any in the name of entertainment would be most displeasing to our leader."

"I…should be angry that you just tried to do sixteen people's worth of my work," Mozenrath said, stunned, "but on the other hand…I guess you belong here, all right."

"You're going to need media production when you take the empire, aren't you?" Tsumugi asked, still chipper. "The other thing I can do well is television production. Costumes, yes, but also set design, direction, dialogue…I can bolster your PR! You could have a news station that sings your praises in propaganda! I can help you write some fake heroic exploits, if you want! And then, once we're established as a household name, THEN we can create a killing game and broadcast it, and the ratings will shoot up higher than ever before! You have no idea how many people will tune in to see those steeped in despair try to fight their way to hope to inspire the masses!"

"So let me get this straight," Mozenrath reiterated. "You don't kill for fun."

"Well, there is a rush," Tsumugi admitted. "Hmm. I wonder if I get rushes now that I'm made of metal and computer programming. I suppose there's only one way to find out."

"You kill," Mozenrath went on, "because it nets you PUBLICITY."

"That's why I wanted to try and impress you with a killing game!" Tsumugi stated. "So you could see a sample of my work and how well I can craft a story! Nothing brings high ratings faster!"

"One suggestion," Mozenrath told her. "There's a man living in this warship named Quentin Beck. Find him. Talk to him. Don't kill him or wipe his mind. Just have a nice chat. I think you two would benefit from it."

"Is he another producer?" Tsumugi asked. "It is nice to have more crew…but I don't have a face for the camera unless I turn into somebody else. I'd rather have an actor who loves limelight to help me out."

"TALK TO BECK," Mozenrath reiterated. "And probably Archibald Snatcher, while you're at it."

Tsumugi snorted. "Who came up with THAT character name?"

Mozenrath's eyes flicked from Vexen to Drakken. "I'm…still not sure this was entirely necessary, but it is impressive in practice. She can stay."

"I'll make sure you don't regret it!" Tsumugi stated. "Even if I have to doctor the script a little, I always put on a good show!"

"Inform me when the replica is complete," Mozenrath said as he spun to stride away and take his leave.

Tsumugi sighed. "The REPLICA."

"You don't want to meet your little brother?" Drakken asked.

"Stop treating her like a child," Vexen sighed.

"He used to be one of my favorite characters," Tsumugi grumbled, "until he went rogue against his creator. How ungrateful! He literally wouldn't exist without me!"

"As I said," Vexen told her. "If he becomes more of a hindrance than help…he is more than disposable."

...

A/N: Trigger warning is mostly for character death (nobody major). Also a strong implication that the Smisse brothers have kissed at some point. There will likely be more ship taboos to come as the cast expands, especially among villains.