Chapter 10: A Giant Fucking Hamster

Momon and Nabe walked behind Nfirea's wagon as they headed down the road. Peter was in front of the wagon, Lukrut was on the left of the wagon, Dyne was on the right, and Ninya was sitting on top of it while Nfirea handled the horse. They still had about another day of walking and the sun would be coming down soon. Momon had removed his helmet for the time being and had applied [Mortal's Mask] so they could see his "face" to quench their curiosity. All was quiet.

"Nabe? Nabe? Are you going to answer my question?"

Except for motherfucking Lukrut.

"I'll ask you again in case you didn't hear me," Lukrut continued to blabber. "Are you a virgin?"

"Can I kill him now?" Nabe asked as she turned to her master.

"No," Momon replied. "I'm saving him in case we run out of food."

"Come on. Momon be honest with me! Are you and Nabe in love?" Nabe suddenly blushed.

Here it comes.

"Of course not! Lady Albedo is the only-!" Nabe was cut off when Momom placed his hand over her mouth.

"Mr. Lekrut, I would appreciate it if you discontinued your attempts to look into our personal lives," Momon stated calmly.

"Uh, sure, I guess," Lukrut responded a bit confused. After another few minutes of walking, Nabe, who had her head down since her outburst finally opened her mouth.

"I'm sorry Momon, sir!" she blurted out. "I didn't mean to-"

"It's alright Nabe," Momon interrupted. "Just make sure it doesn't happen again."

Of course I can't tell her that her outburst was part of my plan otherwise she might think it's alright to continue to act the way she does.

Suddenly, the convoy stopped.

"What is it Lekrut?" Peter asked. Lekrut pointed at a nearby forest.

"There in the trees. We're being watched," he said as he drew his bow and pulled an arrow form his quiver. Momon put his helmet back on unsheathed his two big, black, swords. "Here they come!" As Lekrut said those words a massive horde of goblin and ogres rushed out of forest.

"Momon! What are you doing?" Ninya shouted. The members of the Swords of Darkness momentarily halted their preparations to see what the shortest member of team was yelling about to see Momon was rushing towards the enemy with his huge swords at his sides. Throughout his time in E-Rantel, his bloodlust had slowly been growing since had been unable to bring his [Goblet of the Vampire King]. Deciding to use this opportunity to quench his bloodlust, he continued to charge at the enemy. A couple yards away, a big ugly ogre roared as raised his club to squash Momon.

"Momon look out!" Dyne yelled. Momon jumped and practically flew towards the ogre and sliced the beast horizontally in half.

"Whoa!" Nfirea shouted.

"No way," Lekrut muttered.

"Just how strong is he!?" Peter exclaimed.

"Wow," was all Ninya could say. Dyne simply stared with his mouth agape.

Momon jumped to the next ogre and cut him vertically in half before jumping in front of two ogres stabbing one and decapitating the other. Nabe joined in this point and started casting magic.

"[Maximize Magic: Chain Lightning]!" Nabe shouted as a thunderbolt ripped through three of the ogres.

"That's 3rd-Tier Magic!" Ninya gasped. The others were still paying attention to the way Momon tore the enemy apart. He made no grunts from the effort he put into his brutal blows, no war cries, and no growls of anticipation. Just silence. Complete and utter silence. There were only three ogres left, and they were trying to flee. Momon twirled his swords and threw them right through the backs of the two who had gotten the farthest. The last one he pounced on and grabbed it by the back of its head before…..

"That's not physically possible!" Ninya cried."

"And somehow he's doing it," Peter said in awe.

"What he said back at the Inn wasn't just an empty threat," Dyne said as he watched with wide eyes.

"Remind me to never piss him off," Lukrut said shakily.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Nfirea muttered as his face turned green.

Momon had torn out the ogre's skull and was beating him to death with it. As the ogre let out its last gurgling breath, a blood-spattered Momon stood up, retrieved his weapons, and looked back to his fellow travelers.

"Perimeter secure," he stated calmly. Nabe nodded while everyone else just stared.

"Perimeter secure?" Peter asked with a nervous laugh. "Perimeter secure!? You rip out an ogre's skull and beat him to death with it, and all you have to say is PERIMETER SECURE!?" Momon simply shrugged his armored shoulders.

"Perimeter secure," he repeated.

Corvo blocked another blow from a wooden training sword. The man he was sparring with was stronger than any of the others the cardinal had set him against, but he was no match. Corvo back flipped, kicking him in the jaw as he did, and that thrust forward right into the man's chest. If he hadn't been using a training sword, the man would be dead, instead he just collapsed, unconscious. After the meeting at the Cathedral of Darkness, the Cardinal of Darkness had asked Corvo to attend a few sparring matches so he could see the man's skills for himself. It was obvious that regular foot soldiers, no matter how many, were child's play to Corvo.

If he had become an adventurer, he would've been Adamantite ranked in no time.

That is what the Cardinal of Darkness thought as he started clapping from the balcony that overlooked the training grounds, which had groaning soldiers laying all over the place.

"Well done, Sir Attano.," he praised. "You truly do belong among the Black Scripture." Corvo simply gave an elegant bow in response. As Corvo walked off, the cardinal glanced at the woman in the shadows. "What is your opinion Zesshi?" Corvo, heard him say that and his eyes widened as he heard that name.

"[Blink]." Corvo muttered. [Blink] was a very short ranged and weakest version of the spell: [Teleport]. Corvo, however utilized very well. He had intentionally hidden his magic from the cardinals as were his orders. He teleported on top of the roof that provided the balcony with shade. He pulled up his hood and equipped his mask, so if anyone saw him they would not recognize him, stuck to the shadows created by the decorative architecture, stayed as still and silent as a grave. Zesshi looked like a teenager, but her looks did not align with her age. Her hair hid her ears completely and was styled specifically for that purpose. Half of her hair was white while the other half was black. She wore a black and white dress held together by a red sash, had one black legging, had one white legging, one black eye, and one white eye. You think Aura and Mare are heterochromatic? This bitch took it way too far. On her back was a cross-shaped war scythe. In her hand was a Rubik's Cube. If one was to describe how she acted: everything bored her.

"He was strong, there's no question about that," she said in a voice that sounded only a little older than Shaltear. "I think he might even be stronger than Ruvik Alaf." The cardinal's eyes widened.

Zesshi thinks that man is stronger than the Captain of the Black Scripture, the descendant of our God of Life: Alah Alaf!?

"Anyways, that's not what I'm here about Maximilian," Zesshi said as she put away the Rubik's Cube. "I'm here to talk about that magic caster, Lucifer Dracul." Corvo narrowed his eyes and continued to listen in. The cardinal sighed.

"Once Ruvik and the rest of the Black Scripture return, we will have them sweep the area surrounding Carne Village and hunt him down," he said. "Once they find him, Lady Kaire will use the holy relic [Downfall of Castle and Country] on the infidel and we will make him serve the Theocracy."

Corvo was seething with rage. How dare this filthy human try to control the God of Life and Death! Zesshi simply rolled her eyes.

"Are sure Kaire is up for this? She may be a God-Kin, but she isn't exactly a young woman anymore," Zesshi stated.

"Where are you going with this Zesshi?" the cardinal decided to get to the point.

"Send me after him. I'll bring you back his head on a silver platter," Zesshi said confidently.

ARROGANT WOMAN!

"No Zesshi, we want him alive. If we can use his great power for the Theocracy we can destroy the Agrand Council Alliance and secure human dominance!"

"Hmph," Zesshi harrumphed. "It's not like Dracul would be a challenge, so it would probably be a waste of my time anyway." She huffed as she started stomping away.

"Zesshi," the cardinal called out. She turned around and met his glare with her own. "You may be God-Kin, one of the five legacies left to us by the Six Great Gods, you may be the strongest out of all the countries, even the strongest in the world! But you are NOT invincible. I worry that you forget that sometimes." Zesshi snorted and stomped away.

I'd better get somewhere safe before I make my report to Demiurge.

Corvo looked around and his eyes landed on a bird who was on the roof with him.

"[Possess]." He muttered as he turned to smoke and the smoke entered the bird through its eyes and beak. Corvo, who was now the bird, flew off towards Jessamine's house. He fully expected to get hug tackled when he left the bird and walked through the door.

Carne village was finally in sight. It had taken them another day of walking after making camp last night, but there it was.

That wall wasn't there last time.

Momon stared at the newly erected wall and saw there were people standing on walkways staring back at him. Nfirea was confused and was wondering what had happened. As they approached the gate, 20 goblins jumped out of the hiding spots and surrounded the convoy.

"Who are these guys?" Lukrut exclaimed. A goblin who was slightly taller than the rest appeared to be in charge.

"Calm down humans. You be cool and we'll cool," he said diplomatically while giving Momon a wary glance.

Aren't these goblins the ones from [Horn of the Goblin General]?

"Nfirea? A familiar voice called out.

"Enri!" Nfireas responded with a wave. Judging by the smell of his hormones, he thought of Enri Emmot as more than a friend.

What are the odds? The girl I save is the one he loves? What is this a fucking anime?

With the misunderstanding cleared up, they were allowed into the village. Enri immediately dragged Nfirea away while the Swords of Darkness started conversing with the goblins and villagers.

All the pieces are in place. Nfirea will be mine.

[My lord?] Lupusregina messaged Momon, snapping him out of his thoughts.

[Yes, what is it?]

[I need you and Narberal to back up 30 paces]

What? Whatever, I might as well see what this is about.

"Peter!" Momon called out. Peter turned to him and listened to what he had to say. "Nabe and I are going to make sure the forest is safe before Nfirea finishes with his friend!"

"Alright Mr. Momon!" Peter responded. "Be careful in there!"

Momon and Nabe slipped out of sight and backed up 30 paces. Suddenly, someone shouted from directly behind Nabe.

"BOO!" the woman shouted. Nabe, jumped up and drew her blade, only to be made immobile by the woman's spine breaking hug. "I was soooooooooooo bored without you, Narberal!" Lupusregina exclaimed.

"Lupu - you're – crushing – me -," Nabe choked out. Momon chuckled at the exchange and watched in amusement before breaking up the sickeningly sweet reunion.

"That's enough Lupusregina," he ordered.

"Yes, my lord," she said with a pout as she dropped Nabe, who started gasping now that she could breathe again.

"Is there a reason you called us out here, Lupusregina?"

"Yes my lord," she replied, suddenly all business. "As you know we have a shortage of resources and we need to raise the fame of your alter-ego: Momon. Lady Aura and Lord Demiurge have found a way to make progress on both fronts. Lady Aura will give you the details inside the forest."

"Thank you, Lupusregina," Momon said with a nod.

"I am your humble servant, my lord!" she cheered.

I love it when they praise me but it's still a little weird.

After a few moments of walking through the forest, Aura jumped down from a tree and bowed to her master.

"It's great to see you my lord!" Aura exclaimed.

"I am pleased to see you to Aura. Tell me what you've found," Momon ordered.

"Yes, my lord. Deeper into the woods I found the den of a creature I've never seen before. According to rumors Lupusregina picked up on in the village, I think that this monster is the legendary Wise King of the Forest!"

Wise King of the Forest? I think I overheard Nfirea and the others talking about that while I was trying to keep Narberal from poisoning Lukrut's food. This could be useful.

"I fail to see how this is supposed to help with our resource problem, Aura," Momon inquired. Aura simply grinned.

"There is an abandoned mine here in the forest. The miners were driven out when a creature decided to make itself at home there," Aura said with a smile.

"Don't tell me. This "Wise King" is the one who has turned this mine into its nest?" Momon stated more than asked.

"Yes sir!" Aura exclaimed.

"Exemplary work Aura. I will see to it that you are rewarded when I return to Nazarick." Aura suddenly looked uneasy.

"No! No! I can't accept that my lord! It is my duty and joy to serve you!"

"Perhaps, but a ruler is nothing without his subjects, and I would be a poor ruler if I did not reward excellence," Momon said firmly. "Now, take us to this beast!" A few minutes later, they came across a large cave. "Aura would you do the honors?" Aura nodded happily and skipped over to the entrance.

"YO!" she shouted resulting in her voice echoing off the walls. Seconds later a rumbling sound came from within. It continued to get closer and closer. The cave was dark so Momon couldn't see what exactly it was, but he could see the outline of the creature. Just as it was about to exit the cave, Momon clenched his fist and clotheslined the beast as it came sprinting out. It landed with a thud a few yards behind him.

"Owie," it squeaked. Momon froze.

Owie? OWIE!? WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF LEGENDARY CREATURE SAYS OWIE!?

Momon turned around and found himself face to face with… a giant fucking hamster.

ARE YOU SHITTING ME!?

The creature jumped up and shook off the impact from Momon's fist.

"A cunning warrior you are. Take great pride in our duel I shall!" it declared.

What are you, Yoda?

The creature lashed out with its long tail, all in vain however. Momon simply caught its tail with his bare hand and, with great force, spun the overgrown gerbil around by its tail before smashing it into a tree. With a sigh, he turned back to Aura.

"Aura, go ahead and get the undead workers ready. This won't take much longer." Aura saluted in response. Momon noticed her salute was a raised fist much like the First Order's salute in Star Wars. Did everyone in Nazarick salute like that or was it just Aura?

"Yes sir!" she exclaimed she shot off in Nazarick's direction. Momon then turned his attention back to the hamster that was struggling to its feet.

"G-g-give up, I will not!" it proclaimed. Momon could admire the animal's spirit, but it also annoyed him.

I am not going to fight a giant fucking hamster.

"[Aura of Despair Level 1]." The beast shivered and fell on its back instantly. Finally, the hamster had given up.

"P-please! I beg you! No more!" it wailed. Momon titled his head as he gazed at the beast. It wasn't in Yggdrasil so it would be a shame to simply dispose of it. Besides, its reputation as a legendary creature could prove useful.

"If I let you live, will you swear to serve me?"

"Yes!"

"Will you pledge your SOUL to me?"

"Y-yes!" Momon raised his hand and used healing magic on the beast.

"I christen thee, Hamsuke! Loyal servant of Momon and Lucifer Dracul!"

When Momon returned on Hamsuke's back, everyone made a huge fuss about it. Nfirea stared in awe but there was a new look in his eye when he stared at Momon.

He knows I'm Lucifer Dracul. Everything has gone according to plan so far. It's all or nothing now. If this works out Nazarick will have a powerful ally. If it doesn't then I'll have to kill him.

A few hours later Momon was in a secluded area equipping Hamsuke with a saddle that one of the villagers had given him and Nabe was keeping watch.

"My lord," Nabe spoke up. She didn't need to say anything however. Momon's vampiric sense had picked up on Nfirea approaching nearly 20 minutes ago.

"Nfirea," Momon said in pleasant tone. "Is something wrong?"

"Mr. Momon, please be honest with me," the boy said nervously. "Are you Lucifer Dracul?" Nabe's eyes widened while Momon stood up and smirked under his helmet.

I love it when a plan comes together.

"May I ask what makes you think that, Nfirea?" he asked.

Time for Nabe to learn that she needs to shape up.

"I was talking to my friend Enri and she mentioned that Lucifer Dracul traveled with a woman named Albedo." Nabe flinched. Momon let out a fake sigh.

"You've caught me Nfirea," Momon said as he took off his helmet and suppressed some of his vampiric traits. "I am indeed Lucifer Dracul," and as those words left his mouth, [Mortal's Mask] was dispelled and his true face, without the obvious vampirism, was revealed. "I sense there is something else you wish to tell me, Nfirea?" A few moments of silence followed.

"I requested you for this assignment because I wanted to learn how to make the [Blood of God]," Nfirea admitted. Lucifer's smile grew as the child played right into his hands.

"It would be irresponsible of me if I didn't ask, but what were you planning to do with that knowledge?"

As if I don't already know he just wanted to learn for the sake of learning.

"I actually hadn't thought about that," Nfirea said with a blush. "The knowledge itself was tantalizing enough." A few more moments of silence followed. "Sir- no, Lord Momon, I realize that this may be selfish of me, but, please accept me as your apprentice! I want to become strong like you so I can protect Enri!"

Yes! Yes! Yes! This is it! This exactly what I wanted to happen! Good job vampire brain!

"I'm sorry Nfirea, but Momon is not looking for an apprentice," Lucifer said as he reapplied [Mortal's Mask] and Nfirea's heart sank. "However, I believe Lucifer Dracul could use a brilliant young such as yourself as an assistant." Nfirea's eyes lit up with hope.

"Really!?"

"Really. One of my people will contact you once we're back in E-Rantel. I probably don't need to tell you this, but I'd rather it remain our secret that Lucifer Dracul and Momon are the same person."

"I understand sir. I promise you won't regret this and that I won't let you down!" the youth swore happily as ran back down to the village to prepare for their departure. Silence descended once again. Hamsuke was confused, Nabe was in shock, and Momon simply waited for Nabe to speak.

"It is my fault he discovered your identity," she finally said.

"Yes," Momon responded coldly.

"I shall atone with my life," she said as drew her sword only for it to be smacked out of her hand by her master.

"You are of no use to me if you are dead Narberal Gamma!" he declared. "I do not want you to die. Learn from this failure so you may do better in the future!" A few tears fell down Nabe's fave as she bowed.

"Thank you, my benevolent master. I am not worthy," she said solemnly. Momon grinned an evil grin under his helmet.

All is as it should be. Eat your heart Slane Theocracy! The boy is MINE!