A/N: Happy Monday, and happy 2024! I'm back :) I know many of you were worried about what's to come, so I hope this makes up for the wait.


~ Kim just called me. Are you ok? ~ Jay Halstead

~ I've got Makayla at their house. Text me when you can ~ Jay Halstead

~ Just talked to Platt – she doesn't know where you are right now. What's going on? ~ Jay Halstead

Hailey closed her eyes, resting her head back against the seat in her car as she took a deep breath.

Callum shot Adam. Kevin was involved in an explosion. Children could have been killed. Richard Beck was dead. The case was closed.

Hopefully.

She didn't stop working since she got the call about Adam and the text from Kevin: she needed to confirm that every last person that could have carried out the plans was arrested and accounted for. This was her case to finish now, and she wasn't stopping until she was sure that Adam's injury wasn't going to be for nothing.

Or until she was forced to go home.

She had returned to the district with Dante and got to work narrowing down the list of people they knew to be associated with the Becks. It wasn't until Voight returned a few hours later and told them to go be with Adam and Kim that she even considered leaving, but he was insistent and assured that they'd done enough for the day. Their target was gone, and Kevin was going to be heading to the hospital the second he was done talking through Richard Beck's death. They needed to be with him.

Dante was quick to agree and tidied enough of his desk that he'd be able to jump back into it the following day without being too confused before hurrying out of the bullpen. Hailey hesitated at her own desk, feeling like she needed to stay for them all, but then Voight made an off-hand, quiet comment that he was heading to the hospital as well, and she figured she should follow.

Work could wait, Adam could not.

The silence of her car was the first time she actually looked at the texts Jay had sent her over the last few hours. She hadn't known that Kim was going to ask him to pick up Makayla, but it made sense – usually Jordan or her sitter would have picked her up, if not them, then Kevin, but since Kevin wasn't available and Kim liked keeping Makayla close after work tragedies, it wasn't a surprise that Jay had to show up at the elementary school to get her daughter.

He'd been nervous when she needed to rush out of the apartment that morning, so hearing that their friend had been shot and was fighting for his life in the hospital couldn't have been easy. He was right to be scared about what could have possibly happened to her.

The second her phone was plugged into her car and the menu popped up on her screen, she called him and rubbed her hands over her face.

"Hey, I'm with Mak on speaker phone, so-"

"Aunt Hailey! Are you with my mom and dad?"

Hailey winced and squeezed her eyes shut. "Hey, Makayla, I'm, uh, I'm not with them right now. Aren't you supposed to be going to bed soon?"

"What? It's like 6pm! Uncle Jay is actually making me dinner, and I'm watching. I want to know where my mom and dad are," Makayla replied.

"Oh, right, right," Hailey sighed. It'd felt like she'd been at work forever. Time stood still while also speeding all around her. The chaos of the day made her forget any logic, and she seemed to get whiplash at the reminder that there was life outside of what she'd been doing.

"So where are they?" Makayla asked, "Uncle Jay said they're at work."

Hailey swallowed and glanced around in an attempt to ground herself before answering, but all she saw was the empty parking spot a few yards away where Adam had once sat crying because Kim was kidnapped and he needed to go take care of Makayla. He'd been scared and didn't know what to do or say regarding the little girl that Kim had given him custody of if anything were to happen to her. She didn't expect to be in this same spot two years later with that same little girl's emotions in her own hands.

In the end, Adam had decided to tell Makayla what had happened to Kim, but he'd waited a day before sharing a watered down version of the truth. She'd wanted to go visit Kim immediately, and Hailey knew that if she were to find out what had happened to Adam, she'd want to go see him too.

This wasn't her call, though, and she needed to wait for Kim to make the final decision. Kim had wanted Jay, and perhaps even her by extension, to take care of Makayla. Taking care of Makayla meant feeding her dinner and getting her ready for bed. It didn't mean crumbling the safety of her world and causing her unnecessary pain and heartbreak.

"They're at work," she repeated softly, "You know how sometimes we do secret things that we can't share? That's what's happening today. I'm actually late myself getting home to Uncle Jay. We were super busy chasing bad guys."

Through the phone, she could hear Makayla let out a sigh before she mumbled, "Fine. I'm gonna go finish my book."

"Dinner will be ready in ten minutes," Jay called after her.

Hailey smiled to herself and took a deep breath.

"Sorry," Jay murmured a second later, "She saw it was you calling and insisted on speaker phone. You're off it now, just you and me."

"Good," Hailey breathed, feeling like she needed to whisper even though there was little to no chance that Makayla would actually hear anything she said, "He was…Jay, he was shot. According to Platt, it's right in the chest. He wasn't doing well by the time the ambulance got there and found him. Kim managed to get there just in time, but…I really don't know what's going to happen. A kid shot him."

"It's Adam," Jay said immediately, "He has to be okay."

Whether he was trying to convince himself or her, it wasn't clear.

Hailey sighed and shook her head. Staring out the windshield at the district, she said quietly, "I hope so."

Jay was quiet enough on the other side of the phone, the only sound coming through the speaker was the faint bubbling of water, and Hailey knew he didn't completely believe his own words.

She remained quiet, as well, choosing to simmer in her own thoughts and fears for the first real time that day. She'd kept herself so busy that there hadn't been time to worry about Adam or what could happen to him. Now, though, she couldn't help but let her mind run wild.

He could die.

He could suffer permanent damage.

He could be confined to a desk – and that was probably worse than dying for him.

For the first time, she felt tears prick at her eyes. She didn't want Adam to die or suffer the same fate as Jay. They couldn't lose two of their members within one year. Somehow, they'd recovered from Jay's absence, but if they lost Adam too…it'd be like getting taken out at the knees in the middle of a fight. There might not be a unit to go back to if two of the people who made it so successful were gone.

Jay sniffled on the other end of the call, dragging Hailey back to the present. "I'm, um, making mac and cheese and hot dogs. You want to come over?"

Hailey laughed softly and wiped the unshed tears from her eyes. "What kind of meal is that?"

"A Friday night meal for a child," Jay argued with a soft laugh of his own.

"She needs a vegetable," Hailey replied while pulling her seatbelt on, "You, of all people, should know that."

"Again, it's Friday night, and she's had a rough day, she can skip the vegetable."

"You really can't find anything? Cut up some celery or something."

"Cold celery sucks, you know that, it doesn't have any flavor, and I'm not about to cook it up for her to have with a hot dog."

Hailey rolled her eyes and put the car in drive. "Well, find something. Kim's trusting us to take care of her daughter; we need to prove to her that we can do this."

"Hey, I got her here in one piece, and I did give her an apple for a snack after school. We're doing fine," Jay argued, but she could clearly hear the laughter in his voice.

She smiled and shook her head. "I'll be there in a few, okay? And then we'll figure out what we're going to say to her when Kim and Adam don't come home tonight."

"Yeah, sounds like a plan. Drive safe."

"Always. Love you."

"Love you too. Thanks for calling."

Jay hung up the phone, and Hailey let out a long breath while turning out onto the street. She should have called earlier – his final sentiment making that abundantly clear – however, she also believed that he understood why she hadn't. He'd had plenty of long nights on the job where he couldn't call or text anyone – both in Chicago and Bolivia. Even when they were dating and just married, there were times when they had to work separate shifts and couldn't go to bed at the same time. He knew the unfortunate, isolating aspects of their job that prevented constant communication.

The parts of the job that were even worse, though, were the ones that were coming up tonight, and they were left to deal with the fall-out from a new angle. For the first time in a long time, they were not wrapped up in the current case's downfall. Neither of them was shot. Neither of them killed anyone. Neither of them was keeping any secrets. They were just themselves as people and as cops. They needed to figure out how to deal with Adam's injury in a healthy way. They needed to survive this like they'd survived much worse.

They needed to prove to themselves that they were strong enough for this.


Hailey knocked on the front door of Adam and Kim's house before slowly pushing it open and saying, "Hello?"

"Hi!"

She smiled as she stepped inside and Makayla scrambled off the floor. "Hi, you," she said softly, closing the door behind her. "How're you?"

"Pretty good," Makayla said while hurrying over to hug her, "Did you hear from my mom and dad yet?"

Hailey sucked in a breath and looked up as Jay stepped in the living room. "Um, no, not yet, but the second that I do, I'll let you know."

Makayla sighed and nodded. "Yeah," she mumbled.

"Mak, how about you go wash up?" Jay asked softly, "Wash your hands. Dinner's ready."

She nodded, and Hailey brushed her hand over her hair as she walked past her to the bathroom.

Shaking his head, Jay came to lightly grab Hailey's waist and murmur, "What the hell?"

She weakly laughed and shrugged. Grabbing his arms over the rolled up sleeves of his uniform, she said, "I don't know. This absolutely sucks."

Jay groaned and tucked her against his chest. He kissed the top of her head and whispered, "I am so glad you're okay."

Hailey closed her eyes and nodded. Wrapping her arms around his middle, she lightly squeezed him and leaned into the feeling of being safe and protected. Not once during the day did she feel like her life was over. She hadn't run into any explosions or had a gun fired in her direction. Her plans had gone as they were supposed to, but that didn't mean she wasn't shaken up from what had happened to the rest of her team.

"Just so you know, I did put together a vegetable," Jay said quietly, "I cut up a few carrots for us to have."

Hailey laughed against his chest before stepping back and looking up at him. "Good," she said, "And because we're having carrots, maybe we can take her out for an ice-cream ride."

"Ice-cream?"

They turned to see Makayla standing a few feet away with a hesitant smile on her face.

Jay raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. "Only if you eat your dinner."

"Oh, I will," Makayla replied, "I like hot dogs and mac and cheese; why do you think I suggested them?"

Softening, Jay laughed and nodded toward the kitchen. "Go sit down," he said, "We'll be right behind you."

Makayla laughed with him and hurried through the door, leaving Hailey and Jay staring after her with matching smiles on their faces.

Hailey sighed and rested her head briefly against Jay's arm before shaking the swirling thoughts from it and straightening up. "We've got to pull it together for her. It's not going to be easy, but we have to do it."

"We're all she has right now," Jay finished with a sigh of his own. He then wrapped his arm around Hailey's shoulders and tugged her into his side to lead her into the kitchen.

Makayla was already sitting patiently at the table, looking over the small meal Jay had pulled together for them. "Did you know this is Dad's favorite meal?" she asked once Jay and Hailey sat down.

"Really?" Hailey replied as she served Makayla a spoonful of mac and cheese.

"Mhmm," Makayla hummed, "He loves hot dogs, but he prefers them over the fire. He promised that we could have one on the last day of school."

"How is school?" Jay asked, passing her a handful of carrots.

Makayla scrunched up her nose, but gave in and picked up one of the carrots to bite into it. Swallowing, she said, "Are you really gonna make me eat all of these?"

Hailey laughed and nodded. "Yes. It's five total, you've got this."

Makayla sighed then said, "Well, anyways, school is good, but, Aunt Hailey-" She paused to look at Hailey with wide eyes.

"What?" Hailey said, holding back a laugh at the seriousness in Makayla's face.

"Uncle Jay thought I was going to have homework this weekend," Makayla finished, "It's a Friday! We never have to do homework on the weekends, but Uncle Jay told me to take out my schoolwork and sit at the table. That's not what's supposed to happen on Fridays."

Hailey finally let out her laugh and turned to Jay. "How silly of you," she said, "It's like you're trying to torture her with school."

He put his hands up in surrender, but still chuckled and said, "I'm sorry! I didn't realize kids were so lucky. I always had to do homework on the weekends."

"Well, it's not the 1900s," Makayla replied before taking a big bite of hot dog.

Hailey laughed harder and put a hand to her face. "Makayla!"

"How old do you think I am?" Jay laughed in disbelief.

"I don't know," Makayla replied, a soft giggle underlining her voice, "Probably forty."

"Oh!" Jay exclaimed, "Wow!"

"Too old?" she laughed.

"Yup," he replied.

"Please," Hailey scoffed. Laughing at Jay, she said, "Makayla, he's thirty-six. You were off by four years; that was a good guess."

Makayla laughed and took a bite of mac and cheese.

"I thought you were my wife and were going to support me?" Jay teased.

Hailey winked and reached over to squeeze his arm. "I'll support you even if you were born in the 1900s."

Jay laughed and shook his head. "You two are going to be the death of me, I swear. It's not fair to gang up on me."

"Girls are the best, so," Makayla trailed off and shrugged, smiling wide at him.

Hailey nodded and tapped her glass of water to Makayla's. "We really are."

"Do you think that means you'll have a girl when you have a baby?" Makayla asked.

"Oh," Hailey weakly laughed. Clearing her throat, she glanced at Jay and tried smiling. "That's not something you can really control."

Jay nodded and added, "Plus, we're okay with a boy or a girl. Even though girls are super cool, we'll be okay if we have a boy too."

"But we don't have to worry about any of that for a long time," Hailey continued, "We're not going to have a baby right now, and they take a long time to grow anyways."

"Nine months, right?" Makayla asked.

"Yes," Hailey answered.

"I thought so," Makayla said while poking at her food with her fork, "I have a friend named Emily, and her mom is pregnant right now. She said she got pregnant a couple months ago, so she doesn't know if it's a boy or a girl. We're hoping for a girl that we can dress up real cute."

Hailey laughed softly. "That does sound fun. What's Emily like?"

"Super nice," Makayla answered quickly, "She goes to a different school than me, but we do hockey together. She wants to learn how to be a goalie."

"You're working on forward, aren't you?" Jay asked.

Makayla nodded with a smile. "And I'm getting super good. Jordan's been teaching me how to stop because Dad's not the best at that. Mom's getting better at being fast, though."

Something seemed to flicker behind her eyes, and she glanced down at her food. She chewed at her lip for a moment before eating another carrot.

Hailey met Jay's eyes and frowned. He nodded back with a sigh.

They were lost. Nothing they could really say right now could bring Kim and Adam home or even just assure Makayla they were okay. Adam wasn't going to walk through the front door for days, maybe even over a week, and Kim probably wasn't going to leave his side anytime soon. And even if Kim wasn't the one who was shot, she was still the one dealing with the emotional fallout of the shooting. She had gotten the phone call from Adam. She had been in the ambulance with him as he'd been taken to the hospital. She had to wait for him during surgery. As physically exhausted as Adam had to be, Hailey knew Kim was feeling just as mentally exhausted.

She'd been there: sitting in the waiting room and at a bedside while the man you love is potentially dying, thinking of everything that could possibly go wrong from one minute to the next. It was an awful thing to experience that she wouldn't wish on anyone.

"You know what?" Jay said softly, "If your mom and dad can't come home this weekend, Aunt Hailey and I will take you to the rink, and you can show us your awesome skills. Does that sound good?"

Makayla smiled slightly and nodded. "But only if Mom and Dad don't come home."

"Deal," Jay said.

Hailey laughed softly and said, "That sounds fun. Maybe even if they do come home, we can have a special day."

"Yeah, we'll see," Makayla replied. She glanced over at the stove and sighed. "It's been a while."

Jay's eyes flickered over to Hailey before he said, "Yeah, but we still have to eat dinner, and then if you eat some carrots, we'll go get ice-cream. We have stuff to do to entertain us until your mom and dad come home. Time's gonna fly."

"So eat up," Hailey said softly, a smile inching its way across her face.

Makayla softened and nodded again. Taking a few more bites of food, she said, "Anyone want to hear about my art class?"

"I do!" Hailey said.

Makayla's face lit up, and she started talking about a pottery project she'd started that day. As she spoke, she seemed to relax more in her seat and forget for just a brief moment that her parents weren't home.

Hailey took her distracted happiness to reach beneath the table and place a hand on Jay's leg. He looked up to wink at her and nod.

Things weren't okay, but they were going to get through the night. It was just going to take a little work.


A drive around Chicago to get ice-cream followed by making a fort in the living room to watch a movie in resulted in Makayla falling asleep against Hailey on the carpet. Kim and Adam were brought up a few times, but, in general, Jay and Hailey were able to steer any conversations away from anything too upsetting. Tonight was supposed to be about fun distractions.

As the Disney movie on the screen came to a close, Hailey tried stretching out inside the homemade tent and yawned. Makayla jostled slightly against her before curling up more.

Jay glanced over at the two of them and mumbled, "You tired?"

"Mhmm," Hailey hummed.

Nodding, Jay reached up to peel down one of the blankets on top of the chair and tossed it to her. "I thought Kim would text or something at this point, didn't you?"

Hailey shrugged and laid the blanket over Makayla. "She's distracted. I didn't update Trudy for about twenty-four hours after I got to Walter Reed with you."

Jay frowned, but nodded in understanding. "She's got a lot on her plate."

"Yeah," Hailey breathed. She sat up slightly and rested her head more on the edge of the couch.

"It'd be nice to know if we're staying here for the night, though, or if she'll be home anytime soon," Jay said with a glance at his watch, "9:36."

"And we're half-asleep on the floor," Hailey softly laughed, "Aren't we supposed to be out partying or something?"

Jay shot her a smirk. "Since when?"

"I don't know," Hailey laughed harder, "I guess we're not the partying type."

"We're also old," Jay said.

"Like forty," Hailey pointed out, smiling at the memory of Makayla's earlier words.

Jay chuckled and shook his head. "It just sounds old, right? Forty."

"Kind of, I guess," Hailey breathed.

She tipped her head back and stared up at the ceiling through a crack in the blankets. Letting out a sigh, she closed her eyes and tried relaxing where she was. She had a few more years than Jay until forty, but she had to agree that it seemed old. Before she hit that milestone, she assumed she did want to have a kid or two. Just months before, that thought seemed impossible; she had not wanted to have kids with Jay after what he'd done to her. Now, though, she could see herself having a baby with Jay.

They'd worked to repair the damage that had been done, and she felt like she was back on the path toward building a family. It was going to take time and many more conversations, but it wasn't off the table like she'd assumed it would be. Even tonight, with Makayla asleep on top of her and Jay still in his uniform feet away watching a princess movie, she could actually picture what a life could be like in the coming years. They'd get the house they dreamed of and have movie nights like right now where they ate ice-cream beneath all their blankets and pillows. They could have some sort of normalcy outside of work.

While she loved the chaos and unpredictable nature of her job, the thought of having a "normal" life outside the district was inviting. It'd give her something to rely on that she didn't have at the district, and that something would be filled with so much love. Having kids with Jay couldn't be anything but that. They both vowed to be better than their fathers and swore to support their children in anything that they did. There would be so much happiness and laughter oozing out of their home that their less-than-ideal circumstances while growing up would just fade into the past where they belonged.

Becoming a parent terrified her, but she truly did feel like she'd be a good mom, especially with Jay at her side. He'd broken her trust in this past year, and yet he was working to rebuild it by being his best self. He brought out the best in her that she knew would only grow upon the birth of their children. With him, she wanted to be a better person. It's what sent her to therapy and what convinced her to work on herself. She was learning from her past and improving upon it, showing not just the world but herself that she was worthy of love.

Just like Jay had been teaching her for years now.

She was providing the world with love, and she was getting it all right back. Makayla's sleeping self on top of her reminded her of just that. She found Hailey's caring and support safe; she wanted to be near her pseudo-aunt because she didn't have anywhere else to turn. She and Jay had taught Makayla that while they might work with her parents, they were still her family. She could rely on them when the world was scary, and they'd be there to pick her up, feed her, listen to her, and do all the fun things she wanted.

When she'd suggested they watch the Disney movie, Jay was the first to respond with an 'Of course.' Hailey had loved watching him settle within the fort and get comfortable all while watching Makayla turn the movie on. He didn't ignore her or deny anything she wanted; he just went with it in an attempt to make her smile, and it was perhaps the most attractive thing Hailey had seen him do in weeks.

The rolled up uniform sleeves and loosened tie helped too.

There was a quiet noise at the door, and Hailey cracked her eyes open just as it was being pushed open.

"Oh, gosh," Kim breathed.

"Hey," Jay mumbled while crawling out of the fort.

"Hey," Kim replied, a soft laugh edging at her voice, "What in the world happened here?"

Hailey smiled and gently moved Makayla onto the carpet before crawling out herself. Jay helped her up, and she said, "We were trying to pack it all in to distract her."

"She's observant," Jay added, "And sneaky. It was like she was trying to trick us into telling her where you were."

Kim hummed and ran her hands over her face. "It's not fair. None of this is fair. She almost lost me two years ago, and now she might lose her dad after already losing her biological family. It's disgusting."

Jay reached over to squeeze her arm, and that's when she broke. Stifling a sob in her hands, she stumbled backwards until she could sit on the arm of the couch.

"Hey, hey," Hailey whispered while walking over to sit next to her. She wrapped Kim in a tight hug and said, "It is not fair, not fair at all."

"He can't die," Kim whimpered, "He can't. He's so…he cared for that boy, and he just shot him. Callum tried to kill Adam."

Jay knelt next to them and put a hand on Kim's knee. "Tried," he whispered, "But he didn't. Adam's alive, isn't he? He didn't die."

"N-No," Kim said, "He's at the hospital in-in recovery. He made it through the surgery – they got the bullet out and f-fixed him – but now he has to wake up. He has to wake up."

Hailey blinked back tears while stroking a hand over her hair. "He will wake up. They're taking care of him there. Everyone's keeping an eye on him and making sure he's safe. We just have to keep thinking good thoughts, right? He's going to be okay."

"A child shot him, how is he going to be okay?" Kim snapped.

There was a sound inside the fort, and everyone glanced over at it. When Makayla didn't emerge, Jay stood with a deep breath. "I'll take her upstairs to her room," he said softly.

Kim sniffled and said, "Thank you."

Jay nodded and squeezed her shoulder before going to pull some of the blankets away until Makayla was revealed.

"Oh," Kim breathed at the sight of her daughter curled up on the carpet.

Hailey smiled slightly and rubbed her back, saying, "She's such a sweet girl, Kim. You're raising a good one."

"Bit sassy sometimes," Jay added as he bent down to pick Makayla up.

Kim laughed and wiped her eyes. "What'd she say?"

"Oh, shut up, Jay," Hailey laughed, "She called him old."

"Well," Kim said.

Jay rolled his eyes and shot her his middle finger before adjusting Makayla against his shoulder and carrying her up the stairs.

"Be careful," Kim called softly after him. She let out a breath and leaned back against the cushions. "He's good to carry things now?" she asked.

"Mhmm," Hailey hummed, "He got cleared a couple weeks ago. He's been carrying me places."

"Places?" Kim asked with a laugh, "Okay. So your sex life is back."

"Please," Hailey scoffed, but her face still blushed and she hid a soft laugh. She pulled her feet up onto the couch and said, "That aside-"

"I might prefer to talk about that than the other stuff," Kim mumbled.

Hailey smiled slightly and squeezed her arm again. "I don't know if talking about me and Jay having sex is better than talking about Adam right now. You probably need to get some stuff off your chest."

Kim sighed. "Unfortunately, that's probably true. I just…thinking of him like that in the hospital bed after what had happened kills me. He's…I love him."

"Yeah," Hailey breathed, "It's a horrible feeling."

"How did you do it?" Kim whispered, "Because I don't know if I can survive this myself."

The stairs creaked, and Hailey looked up to see Jay making his way down them. Months before, life had seemed impossible. They were in a hospital struggling to reconnect while getting constantly interrupted by doctors and nurses. Jay couldn't get dressed on his own, and she could barely look at him without wanting to cry. It wasn't fair that her once strong, healthy husband had been reduced to a bed for days on end. The stress and depression that had then cursed him spread to her, and she'd felt trapped in her mind. Returning to work had helped, but it also created a constant anxiety that something bad was going to happen to Jay while he was on his own. It took weeks for their relationship to hit its new normal and for both of their minds to begin to calm down. Living in a constant chaos had been almost worse than what life had been like while Jay was gone.

But what had dragged them both out of their hole was reminding themselves of how much they loved each other. Their communication needed to be revamped, but once they got back into a groove of talking to each other more openly and trying to be vulnerable again, everything seemed to fall into place. She needed to hear that Jay wanted to make up for what had happened and still loved her, and he needed to know that she truly wasn't giving up on him and was willing to give him another chance. They were a team, and Jay's absence and injury put that to the test. That love they vowed to have for each other was the thing that saved them in the end.

"Honestly," she began softly, "I don't know. I love him, and I love our relationship, and I wasn't ready to give up – actually, I didn't want to give up. He's my person, and I didn't want to leave him in the dust. It was all for him at first, but he – and honestly, you and Trudy too – made me realize that it also needed to be for me. I needed to heal from everything too, and helping him get better also helped me. It gave me something constructive to do that felt positive for once. It was almost like the case with Sean, but with a much happier outcome."

With both Jay and Sean, the initial problem made her sick to her stomach, but she knew she had to keep pushing forward in order to actually be successful. In Sean's case, she could keep reminding herself that all the hard work was going to make the world a better place. She had the opportunity to clean up Chicago because she trusted her gut. It transferred to Jay with trusting herself regarding her relationship with him. She did not want to just leave him. She trusted that they could get through this. Even when things became difficult, she reminded herself that they got married, that he taught her what it was like to be loved. That was not something to just give up on, and she didn't regret ever doing that. Loving Jay from the very beginning of their relationship through the hard times was the most rewarding thing she ever did.

"And I'm grateful she did," Jay said while walking over. He sat in the recliner with a deep breath. "I didn't think I deserved any of her help, I still can't believe that she did offer any of it to me after how I'd treated her, but then I think that if she were to get hurt in the way I did, no matter what had happened to her, I know I would have done the same thing. And, Kim, you literally were in this same position. You know what it's like to feel helpless and like you should just be left alone, but you also know that's not the best thing. He was right where you are two years ago. Now it's your turn."

Hailey frowned and looked down at her shaking hands. The thought of that sort of painful karma existing in the world terrified her, but Jay was right. Even in their case, she was now seeing that she needed the emotional help to get through the past few months – including the time when Jay was gone. Fear had bubbled up inside her to the point that she practically imploded and needed to admit that talking to someone was her best option. Between the two of them, now was her turn to be the one receiving help, even if she didn't love admitting it.

Kim let out a soft sigh and nodded. "I-I know," she said quietly, "I'm not going to give up on him, it's just a bit hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel."

"But it's there," Jay said, "I promise you."

Hailey nodded and added, "Nothing's impossible."

Because she truly believed that. If she and Jay thought his recovery was impossible, Jay would still be at Walter Reed and she'd still be miserable and they wouldn't be communicating. Love really did push them forward to where they were now. Love taught her this very lesson.

Kim wiped at her eyes. "I think…I think the part that I'm struggling with right now is even just picturing a tomorrow. He is…he looks…"

"He won't die," Hailey said confidently despite the crack in her voice, "He can't. It's Adam, remember? How many times have we said that? It's Adam. It's also you and Adam. You are an amazing team, and-"

"But how many chances do we have?" Kim breathed, "How many times is the universe going to test us? A baby, being shot, our daughter being kidnapped, and now this? Why does this have to happen to us?"

Hailey had nothing to say, and, glancing at Jay, she had a feeling he was also at a loss for words. Like they'd said earlier, none of this was fair. The world shouldn't be so cruel, and yet it was. It knocked them all to their knees and then kicked them again and again and again until they were left like Kim, thinking that there was no way they could keep going forward.

This was the most discouraged she'd felt in forever.

"I don't know," she murmured, setting a hand on Kim's arm, "I really don't know, and I am so sorry."

Jay shook his head as well and squeezed her knee. She glanced over to him while letting out a soft puff of air.

They were both lost at what to do. They could talk till they were blue in the face about supporting Adam and loving him through it all, and there was no doubt that Kim would do just that. But regarding why this had to happen? No. There was nothing they could say to make that any easier.

"Hello?"

All three of them turned to see Makayla standing on the stairs, rubbing her eyes.

Kim sucked in a breath and wiped her hand over her face before shooting up and pushing past Jay. "Hey, bear," she said quietly.

"Where's Dad?" Makayla asked.

Kim chewed her lip and took a step forward. "He…Mak, he…he got hurt, so…so he's gonna spend some time at the hospital."

Makayla blinked slowly and tilted her head to the side, sleep evident on her face. "Is it bad?"

"A bit," Kim said softly, "But they're taking care of him, and-and we just have to keep thinking good things so that he gets better soon."

Makayla nodded then looked over at Jay and Hailey. "Who's taking care of him now? You're all here."

"Well, my brother's a doctor," Jay said while moving onto the couch next to Hailey, "So he's there. He's a really good one, and he's friends with your dad too. He wants to make sure he gets better, so he'll do anything he can to make sure that happens."

Makayla nodded again and yawned. "Can I go tomorrow?"

"Maybe," Kim said, "We'll see how he's feeling, and if the doctors say it's okay, then-then yes, we can go see him. I think he'll like that."

"Yeah, cause you liked it when we did that for you," Makayla said, "We're a family."

"We are," Kim said softly, "We're a really good one too."

"I agree," Hailey added gently, "I think your family is a super cool one. You guys love each other a lot, so I think that when you do go see your dad, it's going to make him smile and feel better. And Uncle Jay and I will go too, we haven't seen him yet, so maybe that'll make him happy too."

"Yeah, he likes you," Makayla agreed quietly. She yawned and turned to Kim. "Can you tuck me in? I got up there somehow, and my nightlight wasn't even on."

"Oh no," Kim breathed. She shot a wink in Jay's direction then said, "You head back up there, I'm going to say 'goodnight' to Aunt Hailey and Uncle Jay, and then I'll be right there, okay? Don't fall asleep just yet."

"I won't," Makayla yawned. She gave them a small wave before turning and stumbling back up the stairs.

Kim turned back to Hailey and Jay and let out a sigh. "Well…"

Hailey sadly nodded and stood up. "It'll…tonight will be rough, but I think having her by your side will make it easier."

"I think so too," Kim agreed quietly. She ran a hand over her head then shook the sleepiness from her mind. "Thank you both for coming here and taking care of her. Jay, I appreciate you picking her up from school."

He shook his head and stood next to Hailey. "I'd do it in a heartbeat. She's a good kid who got a rough go. We're all here for her and you. If you need anything at all, call."

Hailey nodded quickly. Stepping over, she pulled Kim in a tight hug before whispering, "We'll be here in a minute."

Kim smiled slightly and hugged her back. As she released her and took a step away, she said, "Thank you. I'll probably see you tomorrow."

"I'm sure of it," Jay said. He set a hand on Hailey's waist and added, "We'll all get some sleep, then we'll jump back in to figure it out. We can do this."

Tears sprang to Kim's eyes, but she quickly wiped them away and hurried to the front door. She held it open for them and said, "Sleep well."

Hailey frowned, but followed her and stepped outside. "Goodnight."

"Just a phone call away," Jay breathed while hugging Kim to his side.

She nodded and brushed her fingers under her eyes.

As they stepped further onto the porch, Kim shut the door behind them. Hailey sighed and whispered, "This sucks."

"I know," Jay mumbled. Placing a hand on her back as they walked down to the sidewalk, he asked, "Do you want me to drive? I'm sure Kim won't mind if we leave your car here for the night."

"No, no, it's okay," Hailey said, "I'll be fine. It's not too late, and it's not a far drive. See you at home."

Jay hummed his reply and approached his truck.

Walking across the street to where her car was parked, Hailey could feel Jay's eyes on her, and she knew he was worried. Tonight was stirring up a lot of emotions for her about everyone, and she just needed to get into her car to have a moment to herself before facing Jay again.

It wasn't until she was pulling out onto the main road that she finally let her tears fall. There were so many things to cry for that she didn't know if she could pick one exact reason for any of it. Most of her heart was broken for Makayla and Kim, and a lot of that stemmed from what had happened to Jay months before. Seeing the person you love in pain and barely holding on was painful in its own sense and brought a deep-seated fear that was impossible to get rid of. Kim was experiencing it for the first time, and Makayla was getting her own dose for the third time. The thought of them going through this rollercoaster was heart wrenching.

That turned into crying for Adam. He was one of her good friends and knew her incredibly well. Their relationship never would have gone far, but it built a foundation for their friendship that wasn't going to just disappear. She'd do anything for him, and she knew he'd do the same. He couldn't die. She had no idea what she'd do without him to text in the middle of the night because they both couldn't sleep or how she'd go to work without him there to make a dumb joke or to back her up when she was least expecting it. She needed him.

And she needed Jay. The tears freely falling down her cheeks now were for all the memories she had of sitting next to Jay's hospital bed and praying he was going to survive the explosion and helping him heal in all the different ways. It was the roughest period of her life that she never wanted to relive, and now she was going to be watching Kim go through the same thing. Everyday, she was going to have to remember all the struggles Jay had gone through, and she didn't know how she was going to get past it a second time.


Once she parked the car in the lot near Jay, she rushed to wipe all the tears from her face. She could see remnants of mascara on the back of her hand and knew she had about thirty seconds before Jay showed up at her door.

She didn't want him to see her crying, and she didn't want him to worry about her. They had other people to be worrying about right now and wasting tears on themselves wasn't the right thing to do.

Hailey jumped at the soft knock on her window and sniffled before undoing her seatbelt. Pushing open the door, she said, "God, I could use a shower and a nap."

"Nap?" Jay chuckled. He reached behind her to shut her door for her and said, "I think we should just go to bed. It's late."

Hailey hummed and wrapped an arm around his waist so she could press her face into the side of his coat in an attempt to hide her eyes as they walked up to their building.

"Hey," Jay murmured, squeezing her against his side, "What do you need?"

"Me?" she weakly laughed, "Jay, I'm not the one who needs anything."

"That's not true," he replied, "Adam's your friend and all of this happened at the end of a rough case. You need something."

"I do-"

"I could see you crying in my rearview mirror."

Hailey froze right outside the door to their building and looked up at him.

Jay smiled slightly and put a hand on her cheek. His thumb brushed under her eye, and he said, "I love you, Hailey, and I want to support you, but I'm going to need you to be honest with me. Please don't hide how you really feel. I thought we were getting better at this."

Hailey blinked quickly, unseating a few more tears, then shook her head and hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry," she said quietly.

"I know," he murmured before dropping a kiss on the top of her head, "It's just another thing I know about you."

She let out a watery laugh and stepped back to wipe her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she said, "He can't die."

"He won't," Jay replied. He held up his phone and said, "Will texted me that he's stable. He's hopeful that he'll make it through the night. We can go inside, take that shower you were hoping for, then lay in bed and attempt to fall asleep because our friend is not going to die tonight."

Hailey chewed her bottom lip and said quietly, "Are you sure?"

Jay let out a breath then rubbed a hand over his face. "Can I really be?" he asked, "I don't know for sure, but I do know that a lot of people are taking care of him right now, and I know that it's Adam. He's strong, maybe a little stronger than me as he's liked pointing out. He has a lot of people in his corner, and that's the best we can hope for right now. It's out of our hands, though, and the one thing we can do is take care of ourselves. We can do that for him; he'd want us to get some sleep."

Hailey nodded slightly and wiped her eyes before whispering, "Okay." Pushing open the door, she paused to look back at him and say, "Thank you for being honest."

Jay sent her a small smile and nodded. He set a hand on her back again and kept it there during the whole elevator ride up to their floor. Closing her eyes, she could focus solely on the pressure of his palm through her jacket. It was steady and kept her grounded in the moment.

This time around when someone was in the hospital, she had her anchor at her side. She wasn't alone and had a support system all because the doctors she'd trusted months before did their job. They had saved the man she loved, and that, in hand, had saved her.

Together, they slowly went through their nightly routine: Jay boiling a pot of tea while Hailey showered, she turning down their sheets and preparing their room for sleep as he did the same. It felt good to stand beneath the hot water as her muscles relaxed, but it felt even better to be tucked within the bed with Jay at her side.

Her eyes adjusted to the darkness, and she let out a long breath as she placed her empty mug on her side table before laying back in bed. "The shower helped, but I still don't know if I'll be able to sleep."

"I know," Jay sighed. He pulled the blankets further over them and tugged her against him. "I have a feeling I might…I might…"

Hailey bit her lip and patiently waited for the rest of his sentence. Her fingers slowly brushed along his arm wrapped protectively around her, and she listened to the soft puffs of air he was letting out as his heartbeat thudded against her back.

"If I have a nightmare, I'm going to apologize now," he finally whispered, "It's probably going to happen, and I'm sorry if I wake you up for it."

"Don't be," she said softly before rolling over in his hold. She reached up to kiss the edge of his jaw and added, "We talked about this, remember? It's a give and take. We're not indestructible and need help sometimes, that's okay. Whether I have a nightmare or you do or even if we both find ourselves struggling in the middle of the night, we made a vow to stay together and support each other. If you're going to convince me that everything is going to be okay, I'm going to do the exact same thing for you."

Jay smiled slightly and nodded. "Thank you," he said quietly.

"Of course," she hummed. She brushed her fingers lightly over his hair then tucked her head against his chest. "Maybe we talk until we fall asleep? If we tire ourselves out, then we should be able to fall asleep rather easily."

Jay chuckled and hugged her to him. "Talking is one way to do that."

She laughed with him and shook her head. "Don't. This is not the time for sex."

"Fair," Jay said with a kiss to the top of her head, "I'd like to say then that I loved watching you with Makayla today."

Smiling, Hailey said, "I was going to say the same thing to you. What'd you two do when you picked her up from school?"

"Uh, well, she was a little shocked to see me with all the other parents, but she knew I had to have been there to pick her up; Kim and Adam must have told her recently that I could grab her if they ever get caught up at work. Anyways, she wanted to swing for a bit, so she did that, and that's when the questions started," Jay explained.

Hailey hummed and trailed her hand down his side. "What exactly did Kim tell you? What did you know?"

"God, it was…panicked. I don't think I want to ever get that call again. I know that one from Kevin the other day was bad because you were in the hospital, but he was very clear that you were okay. I was not completely worried about you. Kim…it was a rushed yelling – she'd said Adam had been shot, they were at the hospital, something about a lot of blood, and that I needed to get Makayla from school." Jay stopped to clear his throat, and his fingers dug into Hailey's side a little tighter. "That was the clearest part. She didn't know where Beck was, and she needed to know Makayla was safe. I promised her I'd take care of it, and she hung up. I didn't know if you were involved or where you were or what was happening. I didn't even know who shot him until Trudy called me. That was terrifying. I had to trust that someone would have called me had you gotten hurt."

Hailey nodded and scooted back enough to get a better look at him. Rubbing her hand over his side, she breathed, "They will. I know they will."

"They would," Jay corrected, "They would tell me. Don't say 'will' – it makes it sound like you're next."

Frowning, Hailey nodded slightly. She couldn't afford to think like that either. If she kept her mind in the field and focused on what was at hand, she would remain safe. Any sort of thought about getting hurt could put that energy into the world, and she really didn't want Jay to experience what she'd had to go through regarding his hospital stay.

The Halsteads needed to stay uninjured and safe for the remainder of their lives. Jay had done enough time in the hospital to last them a lifetime.

He sighed, though, and kissed her forehead before continuing, "When I got her home, I asked her if she had homework, and that's when she all too kindly told me that she never has homework on the weekend and that I needed to catch up."

Hailey laughed and said, "Well, what were you thinking? What kid would even want to do homework on the weekend?"

"No clue," Jay chuckled, "But she's all into space, so I figured it'd be worth a shot. I made her a snack, we talked about what she wanted to have for dinner, and then she taught me how to make slime."

"Oh, really?" Hailey asked with a wide smile, "And what'd you think of that?"

"It was sticky," he replied instantly, "Just all stuck in my hands, it was a bit gross."

Hailey laughed harder. "That was not the science experiment for you then."

"No," Jay said, laughing softly himself, "But it was okay. It got her mind off Kim and Adam. She's damn smart, though: practically had the recipe memorized and knew what to do when it was too wet. I was impressed."

Hailey hummed and said, "You do like science stuff."

"Yeah, it's cool," he answered. Stifling a yawn with his fist, he said, "Without telling her I'd make bombs, I told her I did some stuff in the army. She asked if I could make a volcano with her, and I said we'd do it outside on a nicer day. I didn't want to mess up the kitchen even if I thought it'd be funny to make a mess for her parents."

"Don't become that uncle," Hailey laughed softly.

"I'm not," Jay answered quickly, "I just told you that I said we couldn't make a volcano inside. If we have to watch her this weekend, that's when we'll do it. She'll like it. I'll even go buy the stuff."

Hailey smirked as she shook her head. Letting out a soft breath, she relaxed in bed and asked, "Are you going to teach our own kids how to do that stuff?"

"Of course," Jay answered, brushing a strand of hair from her face, "Our kids are going to be damn smart: I'll teach them all the science stuff, and you can teach them everything about reading and writing – they're on their own for math."

Hailey laughed again. "I guess that could be fair. I don't know how great I am at writing, though."

Jay raised an eyebrow, but hesitated for a moment.

"What?" Hailey asked softly.

He chewed his lip slightly then said, "I've seen you writing in your notebook. I swear I haven't read what you've put in it, but it looks like a lot more than just some lists like what's in mine. You've got paragraphs in there. You're writing."

Hailey blushed and slid her eyes down to his chest. She allowed her finger to follow and slowly traced along the stark scars still present on his skin.

She was writing. It was never a planned thing, but if she found herself staring out the window or waiting for dinner to cook, she'd grab her small notebook and begin pouring her thoughts out onto the paper. Still, most of the time she wrote about Jay, but she was starting to write more about her dad and growing up. It did help clear her mind and helped her think of things to talk with Robin about.

She'd never written much while growing up. While she enjoyed the writing assignments in her English classes, she never chose to sit down and actually write a story or poem. She had thought, though, that it was fun and that she was good at it. Even now as she scanned over the different pieces of her heart written out for anyone to see, she was proud of the string of words she'd create. Some of it was messy, like that first short essay she'd done about Jay and what she considered to be her home, but she was proud of most of it.

She could also see the progress she'd been making whether it was in therapy or on her own. She had been able to process her thoughts and fears a lot easier when they were pouring from her pen onto paper. The words reflected what she was too scared to admit aloud all while still helping her make sense of it all. There were many nights where she'd sit up and write while Jay was in the shower or otherwise preoccupied, and those nights tended to be ones that led to resting better.

She was writing, and it was working.

"Yeah, I-I guess I am," she said softly, "But it's nothing professional. Just thoughts."

Jay shrugged slightly and said, "It's something, though. I bet you even spell correctly."

Hailey finally laughed softly and relaxed in the mattress. "Maybe. How would I know, though? I don't have a dictionary in my head. I could be spelling every word wrong and have no idea."

Jay chuckled and pulled her back against him to kiss her head. "I guarantee you're spelling everything right. It's what you do."

Hailey smiled and curled up against him.

Jay yawned again and breathed, "Smart kids, I'm telling you. We're going to have good kids. Can't wait."

Hailey hummed and closed her eyes. "I usually think that, too, whenever we see Makayla."

"Also a good kid," Jay said as he rested his head on hers, "But ours…in the future, Hailey…"

She nodded and took a deep breath.

Way in the future, when they found themselves in a house with a yard and maybe even a dog, that's when they'd have those kids. They'd be kind like Makayla and smart like Jay and determined like her and loved more than anything in the world. Cute, funny kids that made her heart a little more full and her mind a little more chaotic.

It was an adventure to be taken way in the future, but it was still one she dreamt of that night once she'd finally fallen asleep.


A/N: Let me know what you think? :)