DROWNING

"You're late," Shigaraki said the moment everyone showed up. "And All Might's not here. All respect to the programmers, but whoever coded your NPC behavior should be fired."

"Who are you?" Aizawa barked. "And why are you here?"

"I had this whole villain monologue thing planned out, but we're behind schedule. Kurogiri, do the thing."

"What thing?" Kurogiri asked.

Shigaraki glared at him. "We went over this! Just make the portals already!"

"Understood sir."

A portal appeared under Shigaraki's feet. As he fell through, he shouted "Wrong lever!"

"Always wanted to do that," Kurogiri mused. He looked up at the heroes and said, "Right, you're still here. Let's fix that."

Holes opened underneath everyone's feet. Iida sprinted away in time, while Ochako floated herself away and Sero latched onto her with his tape. Most everyone else, including Izuku, fell through.

A ship appeared underneath Izuku. He plummeted through the deck, past the engine block, and straight through the hull, ripping through the metal like tissue paper.

As he sank towards the bottom, a shark-faced villain darted towards him. Tsuyu frantically swam after him, but the villain reached him first. The villain took bit into his torso. All his teeth snapped off, and a trail of red marked the fleeing villain's path.

Tsuyu tried to pull Izuku, but Izuku proved far too heavy for her to move. As her oxygen ran out, Tsuyu swam up to the rapidly sinking deck of the Enormous. Mineta frantically tried to patch the hull with his balls, but the water pressure kept pushing them away.

Seeing villains closing in and the boat sinking, Tsuyu picked up a stray violin and started playing. Mineta looked up and shouted, "What do you think this is, the Titanic?"

"Well, what else can we do?"

"At least let me draw you like one of those French girls."

Tsuyu slapped him with her tongue. "I don't like the French. They ate one of my cousins."

The ship tilted to the side. Mineta shrieked and clutched at Tsuyu, only to come away covered in mucus when Tsuyu wriggled out of his grasp. Crunching sounds came from the bottom of the ship, and the ship sank even faster.

"The villains are coming! We're doomed!"

"Yeah, probably."

"Why are you so calm? I'm about to die a virgin!"

The deck vanished beneath the water. Once they sank up to their knees, however, the sinking stopped. The deck rose, now green in color, and Izuku's face looked out from the prow of a brand-new ship.

"I am a boat now," Izuku said.

"That's nice. Could you get us back to dry land?"

The villains, hearing all this, shouted, "They're getting away! Stop them!"

They rushed towards the back of the boat. The back of the boat rushed towards them. Villains shrieked as the stern smacked them into the air.

"Oops," Izuku said. "Installed the engine throttle backwards."

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ffnet hasn't been letting me edit docs that I upload. Very annoying.