Chapter 2
Breezepelt waited with bated breath alongside the rest of the gathered cats as Hollyleaf spoke. "You think you know me. And my brothers, Lionblaze and Jayfeather of ThunderClan. You think you know us, but everything you have been told about us is a lie! We are not the kits of Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight."
And a boring Gathering suddenly got much more interesting.
"What?" Brambleclaw shot to his paws from where he sat with the other deputies among the roots of the Great Oak. "Squirrelflight, why is she talking such nonsense?"
Squirrelflight stood up to face her mate. To Breezepelt's surprise, she looked guilty, rather than shocked by her daughter's outburst. Was Hollyleaf telling the truth? Had all the Clans, even Brambleclaw, been lied to?
"I'm sorry, Brambleclaw, but it's true. I'm not their mother, and you are not their father."
The Clan deputy stared at her, mouth agape. "Then who is?"
Squirrelflight turned her sad gaze on her daughter- no, not her daughter. Someone else's daughter. "Tell them, Hollyleaf. I kept the secret for seasons; I'm not going to reveal it now."
"Coward!" Hollyleaf spat. She was shaking, though with anger or fear Breezepelt couldn't tell. Her gaze swept around the clearing, and Breezepelt's eyes followed hers. Every cat was shocked into silence by the outburst. Something like this happening at a Gathering was unprecedented.
Hollyleaf's gaze hung on his father for a moment, and glancing over, he was surprised to see his father staring back with abject horror on his face. Unlike the shock and confusion that every other cat wore, Crowfeather looked scared. As if he was begging her not to speak. As if he knew what was coming. Why would his father already know what Hollyleaf was about to say?
"I'm not afraid of the truth!" declared Hollyleaf. "Leafpool is our mother, and Crowfeather—yes, Crowfeather of WindClan—is our father."
Breezepelt's mind froze. It couldn't be true. It wasn't possible. His father would never have been with a ThunderClan cat! Even if it was clear to any cat with eyes that his father had never really loved his mother. And even if the rest of WindClan did always look at Crowfeather with suspicion and anger, and whisper about him in voices that would always go silent when they noticed Breezepelt nearby. And even if Crowfeather did get angry and change the subject whenever ThunderClan was mentioned…
No. It wasn't possible. Crowfeather was his father, not these other cats'. This had to be a lie.
Around him, yowls of shock came from all across the clearing. Hollyleaf shouted over them, "These cats were so ashamed of us that they gave us away and lied to every single one of you to hide the fact that they had broken the warrior code. It's all her fault." She whipped her tail around to point at Leafpool. "How can the Clans survive when there are cowards and liars at the very heart of them?"
Crowfeather sprung to his paws. "It's not true! She's the one who's lying!" Seeing his father deny these outrageous claims should have reassured him, but Crowfeather's bristling fur and eyes darting all about as if daring anyone to disagree with him was not the image of a cat telling the truth.
Then Leafpool stood up. The crowd of cats fell silent, their eyes turned toward her. "It's true, Crowfeather," she meowed. "I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you, but there was never a right time."
She looked truly sorry. Her amber eyes were seared with grief and guilt, and they begged Crowfeather to forgive her.
"You mean nothing to me, Leafpool," Crowfeather said coldly. "That moon has passed."
That moon has passed. So it was true. His father had been in love with this ThunderClan cat. Their medicine cat, no less. Looking at his mother, he found fury in her eyes, glaring not at Leafpool but at Crowfeather. Fury, but not surprise. She had known. Maybe she hadn't known about the kits, but she had known about his father's affair with Leafpool. Had the whole Clan known?
"My loyalty is only to WindClan, and I have no kits other than Breezepelt," finished Crowfeather, glancing over at Breezepelt and his mother.
A wave of rage rose up in him. It was almost funny, hearing his father talk about him in front of all the Clans, denying his other children in defense of Breezepelt. Maybe he would have been flattered, if it wasn't for the fact that never in his entire life had Breezepelt felt loved by his father. He had seen the way other fathers looked at their sons, with pride and adoration. Crowfeather had never been like that. And now he saw why- he had never been the son his father wanted. He had wanted kits with this ThunderClan cat, not with Nightcloud. He had wanted Lionblaze, or maybe even Jayfeather, despite the fact that their very existence was a violation of the warrior code.
As his father looked over at him, imploring him to understand, he bared his teeth in a snarl. He certainly wasn't going to play the perfect loving son to allow his father to paint a picture of his lovely WindClan family. They had never been a perfect family, and they certainly would never be one now.
Across the clearing, Leafpool was speaking to Firestar, still crouched on his branch, seemingly frozen by shock. Learning that both of his daughters were liars would probably have that effect.
"I know that I cannot be ThunderClan's medicine cat any longer," Leafpool meowed. "I'm so very sorry to you, Firestar, and to all my Clanmates. Please know that I tried my best, and regretted what I had done with every single breath." Her voice cracked on the last word, and she paused, swallowing, before she continued. "But I couldn't regret having my kits. They are fine cats, and I will always be proud of them."
She gave Crowfeather one last glance, a glance that held longing and sorrow and guilt, and Breezepelt wanted to claw her eyes out. She had no right to look at his father or any member of his family, not after all of the damage she had done.
Then she padded across the clearing with her head bowed, cats scrambling out of her way as she pushed her way through the bushes, out of sight. Every cat stared after her, as if no one knew what to say in the wake of these revelations.
Then conversation erupted again. Brambleclaw moved towards Squirrelflight, furious and betrayed, and all the other clans cried out in shock and anger, wondering what would happen next. Beside him, his mother whirled on his father.
"Did you know?" she demanded. "Did you know you had kits in ThunderClan? Oh, I told you your affair with Leafpool would end badly. Every cat did! But you couldn't listen. You never listened to anyone or anything other than what you wanted."
"Nightcloud, I had no idea," Crowfeather insisted. "She lied to me just as she lied to everyone else. She is nothing to me now. Nothing! Just a horrible mistake from my past that I regret more than I could ever regret anything."
Around them, the rest of WindClan had started to stare, his family suddenly in the center of the Clan's attention. The faces of his Clanmates were surprised, horrified, but also… excited? As if this was all just some fascinating gossip they had just received. As if real cats' lives weren't being ruined.
Turning, he saw Heathertail. She looked sorry, and she stepped forward as if about to comfort him. He didn't need her pity! He didn't need any cat's pity, and he certainly didn't need their stares. As she opened her mouth to speak, probably some foolish thing about how hard this must be for him, he snarled, raising his hackles and narrowing his eyes to make it clear he had no patience for this right now.
Her eyes widened in shock, and she backed away, retreating into the crowd. Good. This was none of her business.
Beside him, his mother and father had started to circle each other as if they were about to fight.
"We lost two kits!" yowled Nightcloud. "We lost all of our kits but one, and you weren't there for me at all! You couldn't even look at me! But of course why would you care, when you had three more in ThunderClan?"
"I already told you, I didn't know," hissed Crowfeather. "You have no right to speak to me that way, as if the loss of our kits didn't hurt me just as much as they hurt you. I grieved the same as you did! You pushed me away, you never let me show emotion, it was all about you."
Breezepelt couldn't take it. The mention of his littermates was too much to bear. He had had two littermates, but one was born stillborn and one had died shortly after birth. He barely had any memory of them, just the vague sensation of their bodies beside his. They had never even been named. His littermates had more importance in his parents' frequent arguments than they had ever had in life.
The thought came to mind before he dismissed it that if his littermates had survived, they could have been like Hollyleaf, Lionblaze and Jayfeather. There would have been three of them. Would they have grown up with that same closeness? Would their parents have loved them, the way Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw had loved their kits before it was revealed they weren't really their kits at all? Would his parents have never hated each other?
As his mother launched another stream of insults at his father, Breezepelt slipped through the crowd of watching cats, and dashed through the bushes towards the log bridge. He didn't even know where he was going, just that he couldn't be there anymore, facing the stares of his Clanmates.
Crossing the bridge, he dashed across the moorland that was WindClan's territory. He had always felt most at home on the open grassy fields, where he was free to run as fast as he liked without trees or rocks getting in the way. The WindClan blood in his veins called him to the open air, just as it called to all of his Clanmates. WindClan blood I share with three ThunderClan cats, he reminded himself. They were half-Clan. Did they feel at home on the moors like him?
Pushing those thoughts from his mind, he ran, letting his paws carry him up and down the rolling hills of his territory as fast as they could. Running helped banish all of his thoughts of the Gathering, until he finally paused atop a hill to catch his breath, turning desperately to the stars. Had StarClan known about this betrayal? If so, how had they allowed Leafpool to carry on as medicine cat? Why hadn't they sent a sign to all cats, letting them know about the treason of Crowfeather and Leafpool? Did they care at all?
His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of another cat tearing across the moors, hugging close to the lake. Without checking to see who it was, he ducked behind a shrub. He had no interest in talking to any cat right then.
When the other shape had gone, he looked around, registering he had almost reached the ThunderClan border, and he realized he had nowhere to go. He couldn't go back to the camp, where the rest of his Clan would return from the Gathering soon, and face everyone's pitying stares and endless questions. Besides, would any cat even care if he never returned? Certainly his own parents wouldn't.
He turned and walked up the river separating WindClan from ThunderClan. He couldn't return to WindClan yet, and he clearly couldn't enter an enemy territory. He had no plan. He wandered up and down the river for a bit, unsure of where to go.
Then, he paused. In front of him was the entrance to the tunnels WindClan had used a few moons ago when attacking ThunderClan. Breezepelt remembered his first time in the tunnels, with Hollyleaf, Lionblaze, and Jayfeather, along with Heathertail and the kits they had gone in to save. He remembered his terror, as they had nearly drowned. But he also knew that no other cat would look for him there, and that they would never find him even if they did. It was the perfect place to be alone.
With only a moment of hesitation, he shoved his fear of the tunnels down and plunged into the darkness.
However, less than a minute later, he heard a rumbling noise. Whirling around, he saw rocks falling towards him from the tunnel mouth. Panicked, he ran deeper into the tunnels, his only thoughts of avoiding being crushed. When the rumbling finally ceased and the rocks stopped moving, he turned. To his horror, the starlight illuminating the tunnel exit was gone. Rocks completely filled in the exit- he was trapped.
Right, okay, don't panic, he told himself. The tunnels are a network, right? So I just need to find another exit. And if it leads into ThunderClan… well I'll figure that out later.
The utter darkness of the tunnel made it hard not to remember the last time he was here. The terror of being washed away by the flooding of the tunnels. Oh StarClan, please don't let it rain, he thought.
He walked for what must have been a few hours, alone in the darkness and making turns when another tunnel split off from his, before he realized he could see a faint light up ahead. Excitedly, he broke into a run towards the patch of gray light in the tunnel ahead.
But as he got closer, he realized there was another cat already there. He couldn't make out who it was in the dim lighting, but he slowed his steps, treading more quietly so as not to alert a potential enemy. Were there really cats living down here? How did they survive?
However, to his surprise, the shape that came into focus was of a cat he was very familiar with.
"Hollyleaf?" he asked incredulously.
