"Pey! Pey!" I cried hysterically, gasping for breath. She could hear my shrill cries turning into squalls and then wheezes until it sounded like I was trying to get a message across while someone was sucking all the air out of the room.

"Oh my God, Brooke!" she yelled on the phone. "I thought your panic attacks had stopped! Where are you, honey! I am already running to my car."

"Home," I managed to whisper.

It was my seventh birthday and to say I was excited was an understatement.

"You promise that my mom will be here?!" I asked my nanny of the week for the umpteenth time.

"She said she would be there, Miss Davis and it is after all a very special day!" she had responded, making sure the house was to perfection for the arrival of the owners.

I remembered going through my closet front and back numerous times trying to pick the perfect outfit. "Maybe, if I looked pretty enough, they would want to stay with me?" I had wondered.

"No, Peyton dear. We cannot just go there like that. The Davis' have not sent out any invite and it would be rude to just show up," Anna tried to coax her seven-year old blonde with wild curls. She just was not having it as she crossed her arms near her chest and pouted.

If young Peyton had not been that upset, the young mother would be running to grab her camera to capture the moment.

"But, Mom!" baby Peyton had wailed. "She is my best friend! And she told me that her parents had promised her that they were coming. This means there has to be a birthday party! Maybe the invite got lost in the mail or something. Brooke was absolutely sure her parents had planned her one! Her nanny, Esmerelda or maybe Gretchen, I really can't keep them all straight, even decorated the house. Please take me mom! Please! I already picked her present with dad! I got us friendship bracelets and I'm really really really excited because I know she will love them!"

"Fine, baby girl! Go get dressed. I will drive you down there and talk to the Davis'. If they say it is okay for you to stay, then you can," Anna succumbed.

The little blonde jumped with joy, her curls bouncing as she bolted up the stairs, her outfit ready on her bed for the party.

They rode up to the Davis mansion to find the little brunette perched on the steps leading to the front porch. My hands were cupped at my chins and I looked visibly bored. I was however dressed to the nines in a violet chiffon dress that was almost like a tutu but was long enough for me to play around in. My long brunette locks were braided to the side and I looked like a little princess in my white sandals.

Peyton, contrasting me completely was dressed in jeans and a leather jacket, a style she never seemed to change. She ran up the stairs, hugging her best friend, singing happy birthday off key.

Baby me cracked a smile, trying to keep the tears at bay.

"Hi Mrs. Sawyer," I graciously greeted the young lady who was walking up the steps towards the two girls.

"Happy Birthday, Brooke!" she wished, enveloping me in a hug. "Where is everyone? I thought you were having a party."

A lone tear slipped from my eye as I quickly looked down to avoid them from seeing it, bringing my hand in a swift motion to wipe it away.

"Nobody is here," I answered dejectedly, still not lifting my head up.

"How about your parents. Are they here?" she coaxed, feeling bad for me.

"Nope!" I responded swiftly, hoping that if I answered quickly the thoughts of them forgetting me and the thoughts that maybe they weren't going to come after all would leave me.

"They will be here soon. They said they would," I lied and said to keep Anna and Peyton from worrying. That was the first time I lied and also maybe the time I learnt how to keep up appearances.

"Mom, is it okay if I stay here with her?" Peyton tugged her mom's shirt. She looked at the sad brunette and the mother's heart just broke.

"Yes love. I will come at 8:00 pm to pick you up," she said before getting into her car and sending out a prayer that my parents show up, that I don't forget what it is like to have Hope.

Peyton and I spent the whole day out on that porch. She tried to drag me in to play games, but I didn't budge. Then she tried to get me to cut my cake or eat a bite, but I only began crying. Why couldnt I be the one to get pictures of me wearing a plastic tiara and sash as I inhale a deep breath ready to make a wish and blow out the candles while my family surrounds me and sings happy birthday? Why couldnt I get the loving family whom I would feed the first piece of cake as they would spread some icing on my nose much to my protests.

Before I knew it, I was hyperventilating. My chest seemed to grow tighter and I felt a visible ache. I wanted to cry but all that came out was noises that sounded more animalistic than human. I felt the world turn blurry as my breaths shortened,, I tried to breathe deeper, but it was like my body was rejecting oxygen just like my parents had rejected me. My body burned as I felt a layer of sweat form on my forehead. I didn't know whether I was going to be sick from being nauseous or pass out from the choking and dizziness.

Peyton's eyes widened as she yelled to get my nanny outside. She rubbed my back, but I wasn't with her. I felt like I was sinking into a parallel universe in my head, far far away from it all. I could tell Peyton was screaming even though all sounds were muffled, almost muted. It was as if I was hearing the sounds from a distance. I could vaguely see the steady stream of tears flowing out of her eyes, feeling as lost and helpless as maybe I felt because she was unable to do much for her best friend.

I had my first panic attack that day. Peyton saw everything and helped me ride through it. I had several others after that and every single time, she would drop whatever she was doing and run to be by my side. That was until I stopped telling her I was still struggling with them. I hated being so clingy and needy and it hurt me to make her press pause all the time because of me. She asked me about it one day, when I hadn't called her hysterically in over a month. We were thirteen by then.

"Hey Brooke, how have you been doing? I just wanted to check in whether you were feeling alright. I haven't got a call from you in over a month, you know what I mean. I mean, it's a good thing that I haven't! It is awesome! But, you know, I just was worried, does this mean they have stopped? No more nightmares or you know, anxiety?" she blabbered trying to get her feelings and her worry out while also trying to not sound too forthcoming and attacking.

"I have been fine, Pey! I think I'm over it all and better now," I answered a little tight lipped.

"Oh my God, Brooke! That's great!" She encouraged me, giving me a sideways hug.

"Yeah, it absolutely is," I replied, rolling my eyes, the embrace hiding them from her seeing it.

Peyton got to my house in record time, I was certain she must have run some red lights to make it that quick. She got there to see me hunched, holding my stomach and kneeling on the floor.

"Brooke!" she yelled loudly before sitting on the floor beside me, pulling my body in her arms and to her chest. She rubbed my back.

"Brooke, calm down. Everything is alright. Let's breathe together, okay? Inhale… one two three… Exhale. Okay, it's fine that you didn't get that one. Lets try it again, Inhale… one two three… Exhale," she coached me for some more time until I was able to control my breathing.

These attacks usually left me too tired and back then, I would just pass out. This time, the rules were different.

"Pey, oh my God! I have to go! He-he-he is in tr-trouble! I cannot believe I wasted all this time have a stupid stupid panic attack! What if it is too late! I will never be able to forgive myself! Oh my God! I should leave!" I howled as I ran around the room trying to locate my purse and keys.

"Brooke! What the hell are you talking about?" Peyton looked at me, completely confused. This part was new to her as well.

"There they are!" I cried, finally locating my keys! "Crap, I don't have his address! God! What am I gonna do"

"Brooke! Hey look at me!" she yelled trying to grab my attention. When she got none, she held me strongly by the arms, rattling me, forcing me to look up towards her.

"Somebody I care about, deeply, is in trouble and I have to go save him! Do you know where Lucas' house is?" I answered honestly.

"Lucas?!" Peyton was visibly shocked.

"Peyton, this is life and death. Please just tell me if you know where he lives!" I cried. Why wasn't she understanding the situation?!

"No, but Haley would have it," she suggested. "And what do you mean by life and death Brooke?" Since when do you even know Lucas?"

But I wasn't even paying attention to her. I was already searching my contacts, trying to get the Tutor girl of Tree Hill High's number.

"Hey Haley, Brooke here!" I spoke anxiously when she answered on the third ring. "I know this sounds strange, but my English book got mixed with Lucas' and I wanted it back. He isn't answering his phone, but I really needed it urgently so I figured I would try his house. Can you please send me his address?" I tried my hardest to not sound frantic or hysterical on the phone as if I hadn't been crying for hours before.

Haley was surprised to get a call from me but responded affirmatively. She sent me a text immediately which had me bolting to my car!

"Hey! Brooke! No!" Peyton shrieked, following in tow. "Brooke! I am just going to let you explain this to me later, but there is no way in hell that you are driving. You just had a panic attack! So, get to the other side, I've got riding privileges."

Brooke tried to argue, but made her mind that it would just waste time.

"Peyton, hurry! Please! Please, hurry!" I cried as I looked around, not being able to cope with the dread of what I would find.

I opened the door, ready to jump out even before Peyton slammed the brakes outside Lucas' house.

"Peyton, just trust me, okay? Be careful, keep the doors locked. But, keep the car ready. The moment you see me coming back out, be ready to race to the hospital. Just, just please trust me, I'll explain later!" I explained and dashed, not waiting for a response.

I walked towards the windows of the house and ducked down. I could hear the muffled sounds of the television coming from the living room. It sounded like a basketball commentary. I peeped through the windows and saw Dan sitting on a lazyboy with a glass of whiskey, watching a match.

Still crouching, I ran to the backyard, making sure that nobody could hear the shuffle of my feet. The house had a side door that led to a bedroom. I was quite certain that it had to be Lucas' room. I sent up a prayer and tried the doorknob. Thank the Lord, it turned easily with a flick of my wrist.

Opening it slowly, I crept in like a thief in the night. The sight that I found in front of me left me flabbergasted. Lucas was lying there in the darkness, unconscious. He was battered and bruised from head to toe with deep lacerations that looked like belt marks. I saw prints on his otherwise perfect body making his skin turn every shade of red and purple and brown.

I couldn't help the tears that welled in my eyes as I felt waves of shock enter my body and not leave. I knelt right besides his unconscious body as I tried to make him open those blue eyes I had grown to love.

"Lucas! Lucas, please! Please wake up! I need you to wake up!" I whispered as I shook him fervently, trying to get him conscious again. I was careful around his bruises though. My tears flowed freely, falling on his body and mixing with his blood. "Lucas! I need you, please just wake up!"

Nothing worked as he continued to lie there unconscious, almost corpse-like and Dan was just outside. However, I just didn't care. I simply needed him to open his gorgeous eyes and call me his pretty girl! "Lucas! Wake up!" I cried a little harder and slapped him hard across his face even though I knew it would hurt him. Shaking him frantically, I continued my barrage of onslaughts, determined to bring him back to consciousness one way or another.

Eventually he stirred and as soon as he saw me, his eyes grew wide. He began coughing and heaving until he spat out some blood and then in a choking voice said to me, "Brooke, get out of here right now!"

However, it was too late! "Hey, who is in there?" came a booming voice from the outside followed by the heavy thud of boots on the creaking wooden floor.

"Who the heck are you and what are you doing here?" said Dan in the most menacing voice I had ever heard.

All I could do was scream.