Author's Note:
Forgot to answer back to this review in the previous installment, so I'll answer it right away:
"...do you even request ideas so you can continue this series? Cuz I'm kinda starting to be a huge fan of this! So anyway,as always on weekly updates,another wicked awesome job!"
Good question: I generally accept any requests for any ideas that you readers may have - as long as they are workable. One of the guest reviewers gave me some good ideas, which I plan on putting in full use soon.
Episode 32: Falsify
Most of the time - correction, all of the time - having to meet with Master Hand in his room is absolutely no bueno. As you may recall from battling him in the final stage of Classic Mode, the giant hand and creator of the Smash Universe is a very predictable being (but not so much as his partner-in-crime, Crazy Hand) and loves to torture and hurt others. Master Hand isn't the type of being you would want to be stuck with inside an elevator - size notwithstanding.
Today's unfortunate victim is Mario, who is nervously walking to Master Hand's room, fiddling with his fingers while walking on his noodle legs. The plumber is wondering if he did anything wrong, and will receive a gaudy punishment from the giant hand. Sometimes, the punishments Master Hand doles out are completely justified, while other times he punishes brawlers just for the thrill of it. Individuals like Zelda, Kirby, Isabelle, and a few others are let off the hook, but the same can never be said for their peers.
"M-Master Hand...?" Mario nervously poked his head through the door to Master Hand's room, his eyes darting about the room to see if the Smash Universe creator is present. "...are-a you here, where-a are you?"
"About time you arrived, sir Mario!" Isabelle popped out of nowhere in Master Hand's room, scaring Mario to the point where he was screaming like a little girl. He fell backwards and landed on his back, before turning over on his belly and sobbing out fear. "Oh my goodness, I didn't mean to scare you like that, sir Mario, I am so very sorry!" Don't be sorry Isabelle, you probably were dying to scare Mario like that a long time ago.
Isabelle: Sir Mario has had a rough week so far...on Monday, he was thrown inside the recycling bin by Morton after the Koopaling accused him of stealing his magic wand (Morton had the wand in his shell the entire time), on Tuesday, he cut his finger with a knife while chopping up some onions (the onions certainly didn't help his crying), on Wednesday, he fell from a tall ladder in the library while reaching for a book (thankfully Jigglypuff was there to break his fall), and on Thursday, he injured himself in a football game in the mansion's backyard (no one bothered to help him up, but Master Hand took care of them). I believe sir Mario needs a well-deserved break, in wake of everything's that happened to him...
Isabelle dragged Mario inside Master Hand's room, and helped the plumber up. Mario was no longer sobbing, but he was still afraid. Master Hand hasn't even showed up yet! He could randomly pop out of nowhere at any minute!
"Master Hand-a is nowhere to be-a found!" Mario frantically observed the room, slightly hoping that the coast is clear and he can make a run for it without having to meet with the giant hand in question. "Whatever I bet he has-a planned, it's irrelevant and a waste-a of time! Heck, ninety percent-a of the things he does-a is irrelevant and a waste of-a time!"
"Wanna say that again bub?!" Master Hand appeared behind Mario, spooking the plumber and making him jump in fear. Mario landed on Master Hand's bed - a bed that is likely never to be used, save for any rare occasions - and clutched his chest, inhaling and exhaling, recuperating from the scare Master Hand gave him. "Glad you finally made it here, we have some important matters to discuss!"
"It has much to do with the mansion's healthcare plan," Isabelle explained to Mario, as the plumber regained his composure. "We need to choose a new plan, and by the looks of it, it will be pretty expensive..."
"And you two-a expect ME to handle it?" frowned Mario. Master Hand does, but Isabelle certainly doesn't. "Why must I handle-a every little matter in the mansion, why can't-a anyone else solve this-a problem?!"
"Because they're not the man of the mansion, and as the man of the mansion, your duty is to take care of the mansion's necessary needs," responded Master Hand. "No ifs, ands, or buts about it either!"
"Mario are you there?" Gil poked his head through the door. He's spending some time out of the library, and for some reason, he feels somewhat insecure about it. "Just wanted to see how you're handling things ever since you fell in the library a few days ago. By the looks of it, you seem just fine..."
"I have a suggestion, why not have-a Gil find this new-a healthcare plan?" Mario suggested to Master Hand and Mario, attempting to weasel his way out of work. "You can find-a us a new health-a care plan, right Gil?"
"Mario are you crazy, an old-fashioned simpleton like Gil can't find us a legit healthcare plan, we might as well live without healthcare for all I care!" grunted Master Hand, nearly losing his patience with Mario. Not the first time this happened, Master Hand has a lengthy history of losing patience with brawlers, aside from Mario.
"I wouldn't mind finding us a new healthcare plan..." Gil spoke up. "I mean, what's the worst that could happen?" Who knows Gil, maybe you'll find a heath care plan that hinders everyone, and you'll remain the fall guy forever. That's the worst-case scenario.
Master Hand: The last healthcare plan we had was medicare - I had taken advantage of the system, by stating that Snake is over the age of 65 and that the youngsters all had disabilities (which I had made up as I went along). After that, I cheated the system yet again, and extended the medicare out to everyone in the mansion so everyone would be covered. Eventually the federal government found out (those dorks always up to no good and ending anything that is remotely fun), and they took away our medicare, so now it's back to square one...
"Fine then, since Mario desires to be a lazy bum and wants to be uncaring about the health of every person living at this mansion, I guess I'll delegate the healthcare duties to you, Gil," Master Hand said to the de facto librarian. The giant hand was dying to give this role to Mario - just seeing the plumber mope from the workload handed to him makes the Smash Universe creator somewhat gleeful.
"I'll get started on it right away, better now than never!" Gil responded before leaving the room...only to come back a moment later. "Isabelle, would you mind working alongside with me as an assistant?"
"Sorry Gil...but Isabelle is-a staying with me," replied Mario. "We have some-a important matters to fulfill..." Isabelle began to fret over this - what important matters is Mario specifically talking about? Does it involve trying out something new? Isabelle can be a bit too hesitant to try out new things, she has a natural fear of screwing things up.
"Eh, what the heck, I can find some new healthcare on my own, won't be that much of a hassle. I'll find us a new plan sooner than you know it!" And with that, Gil finally departed from Master Hand's room, and Master Hand inched closer towards Mario.
"Should Gil fail on his job, you'll be receiving partial blame," the giant hand warned Mario. "Hope you'll understand the consequences of Gil's failure as well..."
"Still trying to figure out how Sephiroth came back in physical form," Cloud discussed with Link as the two swordsmen were playing catch in the mansion's backyard, with a football. It's cloud first time playing catch, let alone ever touching a football of any kind. "If I remember correctly, he's supposed to be in the Lifestream, where he belongs..."
"Perhaps he found some way to break out of this Lifestream you speak of," Link assumed as he threw the football to Cloud, who effortlessly caught it with one hand. One-handed catches happen a lot with you have really great reflexes. "You did say Aerith was in the Lifestream, she could have had broken out as well. After all, she refuses to give any detail about how she came back...save for that strange story she told last week about you and Sephiroth getting into a fight, and then flying up towards the heavens."
"Yeah, I don't understand that story either, pretty sure it's just some weird dream she had the other night."
Cloud: Apparently Aerith has loads of other weird stories, and somehow they involve me. She once told this story of how I fought at some coliseum, and I was one of the better fighters, and how I won this cup and...and there was this other story, about sea salt ice cream, and Aerith claims that I used to eat it a lot..I'm starting to believe Aerith spends too much time in the garden, sniffing those flowers might be hazardous to her well-being.
"What don't you understand, it's all about Team Marie!" the female Inkling argued with the male Inkling at a picnic table. The two were arguing between Marie and Callie - co-hosts of the world famous Inkopolis News - deciding which host was better. "She's much more fashionable than that overrated cousin of hers!"
"Oh please, at least Callie knows how to be edgy with her fashion and apparel," snorted the male Inkling. By the looks of it, the young fella appears to be harboring a crush on Callie. He would fight to the bitter end to defend his woman, and that's what he's doing right now. "Marie is simply too laid-back!"
"Marie, laid-back? Give me a break! At least Marie isn't so caught up with how well she looks and presents herself onscreen!" When you're a fashionista, you tend to become insecure with your appearance, and that goes out to all the fashionistas out there.
"MARIE AND CALLIE BOTH ARE CAUGHT UP WITH THEIR LOOKS AND PRESENTATION, YOUR POINT MAKES NO VALID SENSE!"
"So you're saying that Callie has her flaws as well?" The male Inkling, now admitting defeat, grumpily folded his arms and looked down at the grass, holding this L. However, he's attempting to make a comeback of some sort, and how does he plan on carrying it out?
"Link, which side are you on - Team Marie, or Team Callie?" the Inkling asked the Hylian, just when he was about to throw the football back to Cloud. Link eyed around for answers, and then looked to Cloud, who was quietly dissuading his friend from answering. Even if Link doesn't answer the question, the male Inkling will persist on pestering him until he gives a valid answer, so it's essentially a lose-lose situation for the hero of Hyrule.
"Team Callie, because...Callie looks.. cute, I suppose?" replied Link, having to give a valid reason for choosing Team Callie so he could win over the male Inkling while at the same time saving himself from being annoyed about justifying his choice. Cloud facepalmed, shaking his head, for he knows the trouble his best friend is bound to get himself into.
"Hahaha, in your face!" the male Inkling taunted in front of his female counterpart. "Told you there's people out there that appreciate Callie, you're just too afraid to admit it!"
Male Inkling: Aside from the wild paint battles, you got two sides in the realm of Splatoon you have to choose from - Team Marie, or Team Callie. It's like Team Edward or Team Jacob, Clinton or Trump, Omega Ruby or Alpha Sapphire, prime LeBron or prime Jordan, prime steak or prime rib - there's NO middle ground when it comes to picking a side. You must simply choose one side, and suffer from heavy scrutiny from the other, that's just how it works.
"How cute, you got someone to join your putrid side!" scoffed the female Inkling. This is starting to get completely out of hand... "Too bad for you, since I got Cloud on my side! Cloud thinks Marie is greater than Callie, right Cloud?" Now Cloud himself is in a lose-lose situation. He has literally no other choice but to say yes.
"Yeah, sure, whatever, Marie is eons better than Callie will ever be," groaned Cloud, pitying himself for the mess he and Link are getting themselves into. The female Inkling pumped her fist in the air, and then laughed sardonically in her male counterpart's face. Yeah, this is definitely going off the rocker.
"Knew you would come around! C'mon, let's get you away from that loser Link, thinking that Callie is supposedly 'cute'..." the female Inkling walked to Cloud and grabbed his hand, taking him away from Link. "Link should really get his eyes checked, he really needs an eye appointment!"
"And I think Cloud needs to get his brain checked for even giving Marie any sort of praise!" the male Inkling walked towards Link, and grabbed his hand and walked away. "Let's go Link, we have no time for you to be associating yourself with those losers!"
As they were being taken away, against their own free will, Link and Cloud shared brief glances with each other, and their eyes shared the same emotions - fear, worry, and concern. And in the end, undoubtedly someone's bound to pay.
Now that he's in a full-fledged relationship with Amy, Sonic has come to a realization that he will have to make some sacrifices in order to spend more time with his girl and keep their relationship afloat. So whenever Amy comes over to the mansion, Sonic would have to spend quality time with the pink hedgehog, in order to keep her content. It requires a great deal of patience, and Sonic definitely isn't the one to remain patient, even if it was for a measly second.
"I can't help but feel that Sonic has been acting...differently, as of late," Amy conversed with Fiora, Shulk's loving girlfriend, as the two walked through the halls of the Smash Mansion. "He used to be rash and slightly inconsiderate, and now he's being more calm...could that be because of love?"
"Love can change a whole lot about you, that's for sure," smiled Fiora. It's great to have someone to discuss girly stuff with - Fiora finds it increasingly hard to do such a thing with Shulk, though granted he's a dude. "I know how everyone is talking about how Sonic is by far biggest jerk of the household, but it seems as if his jerk tendencies have died down a bit..."
Sonic: Why is it that everyone considers me a jerk, what do I do so that qualifies me as a jerk on the first place? So what if I try to remove front doors, and dress informally to a wedding, whatever happened to being a rebel, huh?! Paul Revere is deemed to be the biggest rebel by many historians, yet you don't see detractors getting on his high horse!
Tails: Would I ever want Sonic to leave the mansion? Well, when you put it that way..as big of a jerk Sonic can be me and the others (though mostly me, I've endured his torment for years now), I'd never want him to leave this place...but, if Amy were to kidnap Sonic and take him to her place, I'd honestly be cool with that.
"I wouldn't say that Sonic's jerk tendencies died down 'a bit'...that blue hedgehog has remained the same throughout."
This voice belonged to Bayonetta, who was coolly standing against the wall. Even when doing the littlest things, the Umbra Witch exuberates so much beauty, so much physical attractiveness - it's literally no secret that the single Smash Mansion residents harbor a huge crush on her. Some of them even refuse to acknowledge the very existence of Bayonetta's love interest, Luka Redgrave - a man whose journalistic pursuits are hampered by having to make errands all the time.
"Nothing will change that hedgehog, it's almost as if his personality has a shield blocking all sorts of outside forces and influences," Bayonetta continued, stepping away from the wall. "Same goes for Shulk, he's happier than a beaver on a log, not even the mighty forces of evil could deteriorate his happy-go-lucky persona." The Umbra Witch turned to face Amy and Fiora, who were both intimidated by the very stature of Bayonetta. The way she walks and talks, it's almost commanding! "But I can let you girls in on the true secrets and vices of your respective boyfriends...only for a fee."
"What exact kind of 'fee' are you talking about?" questioned Amy. The hedgehog is hoping she doesn't have to pay actual money - she's storing up her life savings so she can purchase a gift for Sonic this Christmas. The goal Amy is trying to reach? An outlandish $3,000. One does not simply understate the love this girl has for Sonic.
"The fee I speak of...is time. You must give up the time you plan on spending with your boyfriends, to follow me and see what deep, dark secrets your love interests possess that they do not wish to share with you. Are you not intrigued?"
"Sounds like a very enticing offer," remarked Fiora, who can't believe that she's actually following up Bayonetta. "We'll accept your deal...as long as you don't hamper with either Sonic or Shulk, and leave them at one piece!"
"A deal is a deal..." Both Amy and Fiora have a glut feeling in their stomachs that they're bound to regret doing this...
"A great associate of mine told me that you're interested in going out on a date," Falco flirted with Samus in the mansion's workshop, as the bounty hunter was working away on some high-tech plasma gun of some sort. "They were talking about your desire to get out more, to go out with a nice, handsome man..."
"Tell your 'associate' that he's an idiot, and that he should stop filling your head with blatant fabrications," retorted Samus. "I'm not interested in going out on a date, and I won't be interested anytime soon." Samus isn't exactly the romantic type, and she blames most of this on Ridley murdering her parents when she was just a child. That bloody incident impact the bounty hunter in so many emotional ways, it's hard to describe.
Samus: People are always assuming that just because I look beautiful, I'm supposed to be all romantic and loving, and all that dumb crap. Hate to break it to ya, but I'm hardly interested in love, and I have been for the entirety of my life. Unfortunately nobody will ever understand...
"Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye!" Gil entered the workshop, carrying a notepad. He ripped two pages out of the notebook, giving one to Falco, and the other to Samus. "Your duty, whether you choose to do it or not, is to write down a list of your illnesses and/or allergies on the sheet of paper I gave you!" In order to find a sufficient healthcare plan, Gil has to know what symptoms his fellow brawlers have, so he can find a plan that can compliment their health needs.
"'Hear ye'?" Falco raised an eyebrow. "Bruh this isn't the Renaissance period, get with the times bro!"
"Enough chit-chat out of you, foul vermin!" Gil is becoming slightly more aggressive after handling the healthcare duties...let's just hope it won't last throughout the entire episode. "Now write your illnesses and allergies on the slip of paper I gave you, and hand it to me when you're done. I'll be expecting to see those lists later!" And with that, Gil departed from the workshop, leaving Falco and Samus be.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Falco asked Samus, winking at her, glancing at the paper and then back at Samus. "You wanna...make up some fake diseases and all that good stuff?"
"Normally I would say no to such an offer..." Samus began, evaluating her options. "...but I can't help but feel that Gil is a little too deserving of the torment he's bound to receive." Samus smiled as she took out a pen and clicked it, eyeing her piece of paper evilly. Been a long time since the bounty hunter felt this sadistic.
While Falco and Samus were creating made-up diseases and allergies at the top of their heads, Pit and Viridi were already one step ahead of the curve, as they were already doing the same thing. They, too, were inventing imaginary ailments that make no rational sense, and it's up to Gil to completely buy these ailments as if they actually exist.
"Gil won't even know what hit him!" Pit jeered, his list of illnesses and allergies nearly covering up one side of his piece of paper. Gil is about to have his work cut out for him real soon. "Since he's so old-fashioned, he'll have a tough time debating the validity of the stuff we're making up!"
Viridi: Pit and I have created tons of fake, imaginary diseases that make no sense, as well as allergies consisting of things that no person would EVER be allergic to. Some of the diseases we made up include cheese fingers, Prince Toadstoolitis, and Pit's personal favorite, "pelvic fissures". As for the things were "allergic" to, we just listed a bunch of random things, such as laptops, hairspray, and even pixie dust! If Gil seriously thinks any of the diseases and allergies we fabricated are real, then he has surpassed Pit in terms of naivety... *sighs happily* ...but Pit is such a cutie, and his cuteness negates his naive nature.
"Hey you guys, how's your lists coming along?" Yoshi approached Pit and Viridi, as he was putting on the finishing touches to his list of aliments. Are the brawlers sharing their made-up ailments with one another? Oh, what joy for Gil! He would definitely see nothing wrong with this at all, won't be a problem for him! (But that sarcasm though...)
"We're almost done, just a few more illnesses and we'll be done," responded Pit. "Mind if we give you some of ours?"
"Gladly, just give me the best ones and I'll be done as well!" So Pit and Viridi gave Yoshi the best diseases/allergies they came up with, and Yoshi wrote them all down, snickering. "Oh, did you guys hear about Gil wanting to take away the weekly allowances we receive?"
"Gil wants to take away our weekly allowance?" frowned Viridi. "Why would he want to do that for?"
"Apparently the healthcare plan he found comes with so-called 'benefits', so he feels that having weekly allowances wouldn't be necessary anymore." A little tidbit on these weekly allowances - Master Hand, as the head honcho of the mansion, pays each resident according to their duties. While hardworking individuals like Palutena are on the high end of the pay scale for the tireless work she does in the kitchen, lazy bums like King Dedede are on the low end on the pay scale, and are hard-pressed to receive any sort of income. There's a reason Dedede has his Waddle Dee minions scourge the city for any cash lying on the ground, or even in the toilets of public restrooms (you'll be shocked to find out the things people put in there).
"He can't do this, he can't become power-hungry and try to change things. We should go confront Gil immediately."
"Sir Mario, are you sure venturing through the air vents of the mansion counts as 'taking care of important matters'?" Isabelle asked the plumber as the two traveled through the Smash Mansion's air ducts, and for reasons unknown.
"Master Hand could-a be storing secret items in-a here, who knows!" was Mario's response. "We might even find-a the attic!" Master Hand has once spoke of this attic, but not a single soul has ever found it. This presumed attic could just be a part of Master Hand's imaginary world.
"We can search for this attic some other time - right now, we should go check on Gil and see how he's handling things with finding the new healthcare plan.
Olimar: *reading a newspaper on a couch, looks up after hearing sounds coming from the ceiling (the sounds of Mario and Isabelle going through the air vents) I thought I had told Hocotate Freight to stop sending me alien packages through the ceiling... *groans, puts newspaper down, gets off couch and grabs a switch stick* Stay where you are, Charlie and Brittany, I know you're in there, and I'm coming for you both!
"Was that Olimar just now?" wondered an afraid Isabelle, suddenly finding herself fearing for her safety. "It would be best if we turn around and exit these vents..." Is Isabelle seriously afraid of Olimar? What is that puny astronaut gonna do, strangle her to death or something? Olimar couldn't even hurt a fly, even if he tried to use his finger to squash it.
"Nonsense-a Isabelle, Olimar will never make-a it up here in due-a time, we have nothing to worry about," assured Mario, continuing on his way. "Remain calm, and everything-a will be..."
"Hi Mario, funny seeing you here!" Toon Link greeted Mario, scaring the living daylights out of the plumber as he shrieked loudly and spazzed all over the place, before temporarily fainting. "Whoops, didn't mean to scare you like that, my apologies!" The young Hylian wasn't alone - Takamaru was accompanying Toon Link, and these swordsmen's intentions for being in the air ducts have yet to be explained.
S"Toon Link and I are up in these vents, looking for valuable treasure!" Takamaru explained after Mario came back to his senses. It's a great pleasure for the brawlers to hear Takamaru speak normal English, instead of the typical Engrish they had to force themselves to subject to. "In case you didn't know, Toon Link has a hankering for treasure, and it easily shows! Like this one time, when he was in this dungeon, and there was this spider, and..."
"Okay, Takamaru, they don't need to know about my adventures, they already know." Toon Link redirected his attention to Mario, who just finished catching a breather. "So Mario, what brings you and Isabelle here?"
"It was all Mario's doing," explained Isabelle, feeling more comfortable now that Toon Link and Takamaru are present. Now she won't have to be the only minder if Mario were to go fully psycho for any reason. "We came up to these air vents so we can..."
"...so we can-a search for valuable treasure, just like-a you guys!" Mario finished for Isabelle, completely changing his objective. This resulted in Isabelle looking at him with a crazy look - whatever happened to taking care of important matters, just as the plumber had alluded to?
"Glad to hear that, you can join us in our search! C'mon, follow us, we can lead the way!" So Mario and Isabelle followed after Toon Link and Takamaru, and Isabelle couldn't help but give Mario a concerned look as they crawled through the air vents.
Bayonetta: The goal of the little program I'm doing with Amy and Fiora is to open their eyes a bit, show them the depths of Sonic and Shulk that they do not know...it's for the benefit of their learning, I'm to them what Bowser is to Corrin... *gives a sly wink to the camera*
Donkey Kong concentrated and focused with all his might. Sweat was mightily pouring down his face, and his facial expressions were evincing the strong emotions his body were feeling at this present time.
"C'mon DK, you got this bro, you can do it..." Ike encouraged the gorilla. But the swordsman wasn't alone - Roy, Sonic, Lloyd, Red the Pokemon Trainer, Shulk, and Diddy Kong were all cheering on for Donkey Kong, encouraging him through the way as the tried his best to conquer his challenge. And then it happened, Donkey Kong finally did it, he finally...
...laid a single lump of excrement in the toilet in the bathroom. The sound of the excrement hitting the toilet water indicated the gorilla's strange accomplishment, as the men who were apparently in the bathroom overreacted with much joy, doing things like jumping up and down, hugging each other, and most of the usual stuff basketball fans do after a sick nasty dunk at a basketball game.
"HE DID IT LET'S GOOOO!" Sonic cheered as he pumped his fists in the air, before exchanging a high-five with Shulk. Amy, Fiora, and Bayonetta were all watching this from afar, seeing this transpire through the open bathroom door.
Diddy Kong: Aw man, I'm feeling so hyped right now, I'm feeling like Shulk when he...well, I just feel like Shulk in general! So hyped! *shakes the camera*
"I don't see what the problem is, they're just acting like typical immature boys," stated Fiora. The Homs is still somewhat concerned that her boyfriend Shulk is celebrating over a measly bowel movement.
"Agreed, the only problem I have is the fact that Ike is there..." added Amy. The pink hedgehog has a point - men like Ike, who preach manliness and dignity and strength, should not be hanging out with those men, and shouldn't be acting like them either.
"You will both see the light eventually, but only for another time..." Bayonetta said to the two girls, leading them away from the bathroom. "Why not head down to the beauty salon for...a little relaxation?" Amy and Fiora exchanged worried looks with one another, wondering what else Bayonetta might have in store for them.
A time spent with your girlfriend should be worthwhile, right? Well it can't be that way when someone like the male Inkling decides to be with you all because of some dumb opinion you formulated to please. This is the situation Link is having with Zelda - these lovebirds were in the library, reading a Hylian history book (with pictures, obviously) and the make Inkling was raining on their parade.
"Ew, why do you insist on reading that load of crap?" the youngster grimaced, disgusted by Link's poor life choices, which are actually poor in his own eyes and nobody else's. "Why not try something fun, like talk about how truly awesome Callie is!"
"Or we can try not talking about her incessantly for the next five minutes," suggested an aggravated Link. "Seriously dude, you talk about that woman like she's Queen Elizabeth or Taylor Swift."
"Link, can you please calm him down, he's growing rather feisty," Zelda whispered in Link's ear. Like Link, the princess of Hyrule is finding this situation hard to bear.
"Ooh you guys got some gossip? I got some gossip myself, and it pertains to Callie!" Hoo boy, what a shocker, didn't see that coming! (Sarcasm level is over 9000.) "Did you know that Callie is supposedly dating this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this other guy, who knew this guy's cousin, who knew..."
"Okay we get it kid, her boyfriend gets around with a bunch of dudes, it's like he has his own exclusive brotherhood, like it's some sort of cult," Link rudely cut off the male Inkling, unable to take the youngster's crap anymore. "Thanks for letting us know, we would have been devastated not knowing Callie's relationship status!"
Male Inkling: The tolerance I have seen from Link regarding Callie has been off the charts! Usually when when I talk about Callie with the female Inkling, she would either sock me in the face or, in a more extreme case, throw me in the dumpster bin outside, leaving me in that filth overnight until either Sonic or Yuffie come by to rescue me...Those two aren't still interested in food stamps, are they?
"Zelda, what do you think of Callie, what's your opinion on her?" the male Inkling asked Zelda, who bit her lower lip out of nervousness. She could give a positive opinion and save herself some trouble; on the flipside she could give negative opinion and have the male Inkling despise her for a certain amount of time - or even forever, depending on the Inkling's love and admiration for Callie.
"I think...I think she's alright, in my opinion," offered Zelda. Great choice here, she picked an opinion that offers middle ground, and is not a definite positive or negative opinion, it's fairly neutral. However, this didn't seem to please the male Inkling, who was visibly feeling some type of way.
"You feeling okay man, you don't look so happy," Link said to the Inkling, attempting to make him feel better. "You seem a little triggered..."
"Triggered?" the male Inkling raised an eyebrow. "Did you just say...triggered? What would I look or even feel 'triggered' for? It's not like I'm gonna exclaim, 'Oh no, I've been triggered, someone please help me!' like anyone would actually care!" The male Inkling looked to the side, apparently displeased of Zelda's opinion on his woman. "But I guess, to each their own..."
"You stay here and keep the Inkling company, I'll be right back," Zelda said to Link as she got up and departed from the library. Zelda doesn't know who she's leaving her boyfriend alone with...
Unlike her male counterpart, the female Inkling wasn't bothering her new pal, Cloud, about the person she admires, Marie. Instead, she was acting somewhat clingy with Cloud, doing thing such as playing punchies in the dining room. Unless you haven't watched a particular show about a blue jay and a raccoon working at a park, the premise of punchies is to exchange punches with one another - one person punches you, then you punch back, and then the other person punches you back, so forth and so on. The female Inkling was playing this game with Cloud, and the swordsman was showing a high amount of tolerance for the Inkling's antics.
"No Cloud, you're doing it wrong, you're supposed to punch me back!" the female Inkling explained to the blonde after punching his muscular shoulder. "At least the male Inkling knows how to play this game!" Aerith, who was organizing things in the kitchen with the Ice Climbers, watched as the female Inkling playfully punched Cloud's arm; she was hitting it harder than Cloud expected.
"Cloud must be having fun with that Inkling..." Aerith smiled, if you wish to even call it fun... "If only he can show it through his facial expressions." She went over to the fridge to arrange the fridge magnets, and saw a photo of the male and female Inklings posing together with paint guns in their hands on the fridge. If only there was a way to bring them back together...
Aerith: Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for the Inklings branching out and hanging around with others...but I feel that they should remain together, rather than be far apart. Their bond should stay intact, and it must remain that way in order for them to get perfectly along with one another. Just like my bond with Cloud, even though we have others that we choose to spend time with, we cannot let outside friendships deteriorate the bond that we have...Am I blushing? Oh, sorry you had to see that...please don't let Cloud see this!
"Why look at a photo of those losers..." Popo walked over to the fridge... "...when you can look at US!" ...before proceeding to take a photo of him and Nana fishing and show it to Aerith, like she actually cared. "Vintage fishing right here!"
"Now, Popo, be nice to the Inklings, they've done no harm to you," rebuked Nana, who had just finished rearranging the cupboards. Are the Ice Climbers friends, siblings, or lovers? We may never know the answer to this question, but we do know that Popo is more bashful than Nana, his loving friend...or sibling...or lover...just pick one, and stick to it.
"But Nana, the Inklings are our rivals, our enemies. We should have every right to call them losers, and other words constructed to destroy their confidence levels!"
"Please ignore Popo, ever since we made those sundaes a few weeks ago, he thinks that he's above it all," Nana said to Aerith, who responded with a smile. "Sometimes he can become very competitive when it comes to the most mundane things..."
Aerith looked back inside the dining room, and saw that the female Inkling was still playing punchies with Cloud, repeatedly hitting the swordsman's arm over and over again, until her arm wore out. At this point, it doesn't seem like Cloud is having "fun" - he looks straight up agitated!
"Aerith, do you have a minute?" Zelda asked the flower girl, poking her head through the kitchen door. Aerith nodded, and went to go follow Zelda, wanting to see what she wanted her for.
"Yo, I'm gonna keep it real here, I predict that Gil will think more than 70% of these diseases and allergies are legit," said Fox, going over his list of ailments and discussing these made-up ailments with Pit, Viridi, Lucas, Lucina, and Robin in the cafe. "He's pretty old-fashioned, he honestly won't know any better."
"Still find it hard to believe that Gil would take up the duty of finding us a new healthcare," remarked Lucina. "Suppose he decided to step up when nobody wanted to...that nobody being Mario, of course." Robin reached in to kiss Lucina on the cheek, but the princess lowered her head to look at her list of ailments, ruining Robin's opportunity. The mage has devoted this entire week to landing a kiss on Lucina ever since Chrom interrupted his first attempt to kiss Lucina on the lips last week, and his attempts have all become futile.
Robin: Chrom thinks he can ruin my great opportunity to kiss Lucina, huh? Bet he doesn't want me to be in love with his own daughter! How about I get some retribution on Chrom, and interrupt him when he prepares to kiss his woman!...Gotta wait for Chrom to find himself a woman first. I'll give him two to three weeks top.
Falco and Samus entered the cafe together, carrying their lists of ailments in their hands...wait, Samus accompanied with Falco, of all people? Usually she prefers to go to places and do things by herself, but it must have taken some incessant begging on Falco's part for the avian pilot to be even walking with the bounty hunter.
"Falco and I spent most of our time in the workshop devising wacky diseases and whatnot, and they're guaranteed to knock Gil's socks off," Samus said as she took a seat near the others. Everyone couldn't help but notice how Samus looked more...jovial than before. The brawlers have known Samus to be the type of woman who doesn't give a crap about others, and could care less for anyone else's safety but her own, but here was the bounty hunter, acting happy and pleased.
"Her deceased parents must have came back from the dead or something," inquired Pit, whispering in Viridi's ear, only to be nudged by the goddess of nature.
"That's no good reason for Samus change in behavior, be respectful!" Viridi whispered back. Oh Pit, sometimes he can be so insensitive and he just doesn't even know it. The harsh reality and consequences of being a slowpoke.
"You weren't trying to charm Samus in the workshop, were you?" Fox whispered to Falco, also having a secret conversation of his own concerning Samus' behavior.
"Slightly, but not a whole lot," responded Falco. Fox didn't seem to trust his friend's claim - he doesn't even trust Falco to reserve his seat for him at a big cookout, or any other big get-together where people are inclined to take your seat. "She was acting like this on her own accord, and to be brutally honest with you, I'm a little afraid..."
"You and me both pal...you and me both." Fox would begin his investigation on Samus, but for now he'll share what diseases and allergies he imagined with Falco and Samus. It's like public intelligence sharing - individuals sharing openly with one another (though there is hardly any real information involved).
"Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye!" Gil entered the cafe, grabbing everyone's attention. "It appears that a majority of you have ailments that are not realistic as it seems. Therefore, I'm ordering you to meet with everyone else in the meeting room, so we can discuss whatever ailments you may have! This meeting will prove to be crucial to the healthcare plan I found!" Gil actually found a legit healthcare plan? Shocker.
"Quit it with the 'hear ye' crud, we're not living in ancient times anymore," pleaded Lucas. Gil has been using that same phrase over and over again all day long, mainly to address his fellow brawlers. Must be his new favorite catchphrase.
Fox: Gil found a healthcare plan, call me shocked. Only time will tell if the plan he found will be sufficient for all of us. And on that remark, I'm a bit frightened...
"I can say whatever I want to say, it's my right!" stated Gil, defending his use of free speech. "Now meet me in the meeting room, or I'll have Master Hand punish you all, by making you...uh, um...he'll make you...scrub Heihachi Mishima's back for a full week!"
"Scrub Heihachi Mishima's back?" questioned Samus. "Eh, I'd take it, as long as it's not Mario we're talking about." Isabelle, the go-to girl for scrubbing Mario, would take the offer of scrubbing Heihachi's back any day of the week. You don't know what the poor shih tzu has to subject herself to.
Zelda and Aerith met together in a separate room, to discuss some serious matters. Though these matters aren't that serious - they're discussing how the Inklings are treating Link and Cloud.
"Cloud appears to be bothered by the female Inkling, and her antics," Aerith said to Zelda. "How is the male Inkling treating Link?" Wouldn't it kill someone to at least give the Inklings names for once?!
"The male Inkling has been irritating Link with his strange obsession with Callie, he keeps going on and on about her," replied Zelda. "It is imperative that we bring the two Inklings back together - but how are we gonna do that?"
"I think I know just the solution..." Aerith reached into her pocket, and pulled out a slip of paper, a list of diseases and allergies Gil forced her to write. However, the flower girl didn't write anything down, for she had no ailments and she wouldn't dare to mess with Gil by making fake ailments on her own, but for this purpose... "Gil did say that there was a meeting to discuss our ailments, no?"
Mario, Isabelle, Toon Link, and Takamaru continued to venture through the mansion's air vents, in search for treasure, Their little adventure is proving to be quite noisy, as the noises they were making in the vents could be heard through the ceiling, and heard by the brawlers as they made their way to the meeting room.
Lloyd: Hey Meta Knight, you hear those noises from the ceiling? Do you think a ghost must have infiltrated the mansion?
Meta Knight: I'm pretty sure if there was a ghost, Luigi would be immediately take care of it. Also, ghosts don't make pounding noises like the noises we're hearing right now, they would make scary sounds to scare their victims!
Lloyd: Ooh, what if the thing lurking in the ceiling is that Kayako Takei lady from The Grudge? You know, that scary Japanese horror movie that had that scary-looking Asian chick with the pale skin and black hair? Ike was scared of that movie, he had not one, but TWO nightlights on in his room for nearly an entire month!
Meta Knight: It was actually you that did that, you buffoon...and if such a character were to infiltrate our mansion, we would use you as a living sacrifice...but we've already used you in one too many situations, so it's about time we search for another sacrificial lamb...Pit would be a good contender for the job.
A certain question was looming on Toon Link's mind as the Hylian crawled through the air vents, and he had to ask it right away...
"Mario why are you and Isabelle looking for treasure as well?" he asked Mario, who was stumped real quick. The plumber never gave a good reason for him and Isabelle hunting for treasure - he just went along with the flow.
"Well, it's a bit-a of a long story to tell..." Mario began. Not even Isabelle could bail him out in this given moment. "You see, I'm not-a here looking for a treasure...I'm here-a looking for an attic. Sadly I forgot-a where it is..." Now Mario switched back to his original quest. Will he stick to it, or return to his "treasure hunting"?
"Didn't know we even have an attic..." Takamaru remarked. "Sure, I've heard Master Hand refer to it plenty of times, but I always thought that he was bluffing, using some imaginary compartment of the mansion to boast himself up somehow."
"It's the best-a kept secret between me and-a Master Hand. The attic contains a bunch-a of old relics and what-a not...including a Pure-a Heart."
Isabelle, Toon Link, and Takamaru were all astonished when Mario mentioned the Pure Heart. They have no idea in heck what this Pure Heart is or where it is originated from, but judging by the tone of Mario's voice, it must be a very important item!
"This Pure-a Heart is like no-a other artifact, it has immense-a power and is powered-a by the force of-a love," continued Mario. "It was given to-a me as a gift by Paper Mario, a 2D counterpart of-a mine from a mystical book-a full of paper characters. Everyone from my universe-a is in that book, in paper form - Luigi, Bowser, Peach, Toad, and lots-a of enemies..."
"FOUND YOU CHARLIE, STAY WHERE YOU ARE!" Olimar appeared out of the blue, ambushing poor Mario and hitting him with his switch. "I know you're in there in that Mario costume, you can't fool me! To think that you would have the gall to purposely lose weight just so you could wear a Mario costume and sneak another alien through the mansion undetected...where is Brittany, I demand to know where she is! Bet she has a...Peach...costume?"
Olimar trailed off when he saw Isabelle, Toon Link, and Takamaru looking at him, afraid. This was their first time experiencing the aggressive side of Olimar, and needless to say, his beatdown of Mario was slightly out of character. Fortunately Olimar regained his form, and threw the switch away.
"Please excuse me for my unorthodox behavior, that was totally not me," the astronaut apologized. "So what's the occasion, why are we in these air vents?"
Master Hand: Gil has informed me that he has made each resident write down a list of diseases and allergies that they have, and he's worried that some of them might have written made-up ailments just to mess with him. So we're gonna have a meeting in the meeting room, and test the validity of these ailments to see if they're legit or not! There shall be dire consequences if these ailments turn out to be fake...Is me saying that there'll be consequences has become cliche for me? What else am I suppose to say, "Even though you have committed a terrible crime, I'm just gonna leave you off the hook"? Do you not know who you're speaking to?!
Everyone in the Smash Mansion except for the five individuals in the air vents gathered together in the meeting room, where Master Hand and Gil were already present. Bayonetta brought Amy and Fiora with her, and for reasons unknown. Why did the Umbra Witch bother on bringing these two ladies to the meeting in the first place, it's not like they live at the mansion!
"Bayonetta why are we here, we're not included under the healthcare plan!" explained Fiora as the three ladies entered the room. "Therefor this meeting doesn't apply to us..."
"Oh, but it does apply to Sonic and Shulk," responded Bayonetta, motioning to both Shulk and Sonic, already seated. "I want you two to stick with me, and pay attention to your boyfriends very closely..." Even though Amy and Fiora heavily decided against doing this, they both felt they had no other choice.
"Glad to see everyone in here...well mostly everyone," Master Hand said before correcting himself, after seeing that the five in the air vents, as well as Zelda and Aerith, were the only ones not present. The giant hand will be quick to punish these seven individuals, he takes great delight in doing that. "Now that I finally said those words - you won't believe how much I was dying to say that - I'll let Gil have the floor. Gil?"
"Thank you, Master Hand," Gil said as he came to the forefront. "I want you all to pass your lists of ailments up to me, so I can read over them and decide whether or not they're legit or not. Let's get to it!" So the brawlers passed their lists up to the front, with some giggling and/or holding their laughter in. The red faces of some of the brawlers didn't help eliminate Gil's suspicions one bit.
Samus: Call me crazy for saying this, but I think I'm gonna enjoy this meeting. It will be all the more fun when Gil sees what I wrote...
"Let's see what we got here..." Gil looked through the lists, pulling out Samus' list first. He skimmed over it - and then his eyes bulged. "Samus you have the Cyrus Virus? What in the heck is that?!"
"It's a virus with a plethora of symptoms, like licking hammers, an obsession with wrecking balls, tongue sticking...and something that has to do with your butt," Samus explained while licking a hammer, before sticking her tongue out at Gil. Several individuals in the meeting room were laughing quietly. "Sometimes I have no control over these symptoms, it's terrible..."
"I feel for ya Samus, I really do," Yoshi placed his hand on his chest, sympathizing for Samus, who held her head down in faux sadness. She's playing this Cyrus Virus thing awfully good, gotta give the bounty hunter a lot of credit for her acting prowess.
"That seems like a legitimate virus, and a terrible virus at that," remarked Master Hand. "Any more ailments that jump out to you, Gil?"
"According to Rosalina's list, she is suffering from what is known as the 'Skittles pox'," Gil read Rosalina's list. "...Is this true, Rosalina?"
"I'm afraid so..." responded Rosalina - who literally had Skittles all over her face, like that kid from that Skittles commercial. "Happens to me on an occasional basis, unfortunately modern medicine can't cure this illness - I have to wait it out for the Skittles pox to go away..."
"But did you tape glue those Skittles to your face though?" questioned Master Hand. "Ganondorf, inspect your woman and see if she glued those Skittles to her face!" Ganondorf quickly gave Master Hand the snuggle bear look when the giant hand uttered the word "woman"; the Demon Lord and Rosalina made a vow to put their short-lived relationship on hold back in episode 22, and they also vowed that no one would ever know about said relationship.
"How...did you...even..." Ganondorf was understandably at a loss of words, unsure of what to say. Rosalina looked around, wondering how Master Hand found out about this Rosalina-Ganondorf item.
"Because I'm the creator of the Smash Universe, duh! I know everything there is to know, like how Jacky Bryant stays up late at night to watch reruns of that Yo Gabba Gabba junk!" A now humiliated Jacky looked down at the floor, bitter that Master Hand just exposed him in front of everyone. Akira, Jacky's roommate, nodded his head, affirming what Master Hand said. Jacky will exact his revenge soon...have fun doing that on Master Hand.
Jacky: It's those dumb characters that keep reeling me back into the show...and those colors, UGH! The colors are the main reason for keeping my interest in that show! Same reason why people watch Disney films and anything Disney-related...
"Don't make me say it again Ganondorf, inspect Rosalina's 'Skittle Pox' so we can determine if it's a legit illness or not!" ordered Master Hand; the Demon Lord grumpily got off and marched over to Rosalina, gently taking a Skittle off of her face. You can bet that if it was a woman other than Rosalina, Ganondorf would have been more harsh.
"See, this is a genuine Skittle, Rosalina didn't glue it to her face or anything like that," the Demon Lord showed the sugary shell to everyone in the meeting room, though due to the shell's size, it's hard to distinguish any glue product on it.
"Thanks for giving me that potion, Ashley," Rosalina secretly whispered to Ashley; the young witch smiled and nodded her head.
"Not enough hard-proof evidence, but I guess that'll do," sighed Master Hand. "Moving on..."
"So tell us more about this Pure Heart that you speak of," Olimar said to Mario as the group of five continued through the air vents in search for the attic, which apparently only Mario and Master Hand know about.
"The Pure-a Heart is blue in color, and is powered-a by romance," explained Mario, feeling very close to the destination. "With the Pure Heart-a in my possession, I could use-a it to strengthen my love-a with Peach, which would in-a turn lead me to proposing to her-a and eventually marry."
"Why couldn't you have proposed to Peach earlier, would have saved you a lot of trouble!" Toon Link offered his opinion on the matter. Back in episode 16, Toon Link offered Mario some romantic advice - not to be a try-hard - and the young Hylian wouldn't hesitate to give the plumber more advice if needed.
"I tried-a back in January, and Peach turned-a down my proposal before-a bursting into tears. The Pure-a Heart would prevent such-a things from happening when I propose-a to Peach the second time-a around."
"Hey guys, I see a vent below us!" Olimar spotted an air vent below him. "This could lead us to the attic! Only one way to find out..."
Back to the meeting room, where the brawlers entertained Master Hand and Gil with the diseases and allergies they came up with at the top of their heads. Some used Ashley's potions to good use, making their diseases more believable, while others did some role-playing to make make their ailments look legit. Needless to say, it's working!
Ashley: Thanks to just about everyone, I've completely ran out of potions, meaning that I have to spend my entire weekend making new ones...the ire I have for the mansion residents grows each and every waking day.
"Alright Sonic, you're up next," Gil said as he looked over the hedgehog's list. His facial expression variably changed as he went down the list, his eyes squinting out of intrigue. "You have...cheese fingers? Could you explain what that is?"
"Pay close attention, Amy, you're gonna learn something..." Bayonetta whispered to Amy. "Listen very, very closely..."
"Um, yeah, so cheese fingers, it's this condition I have, it's the reason I wear these gloves all the time," explained Sonic. Evidently he got this "cheese fingers" thing from Pit. "Wanna see them?" Gil nodded his head. "Okay, but don't say I warned ya!"
So Sonic took off his gloves...and showed off his fingers, which strongly resembled mozzarella sticks, but without the breaded exterior. Everyone looked at the hedgehog's fingers in shock and amazement; Ashley's potions must be some pretty potent stuff!
"Well I certainly didn't expect that..." Gil responded, shaking his head out of fright. "I would have you eat one of your fingers, but that would be too big of a risk. Who else do we have..." Gil picked out Shulk's list, and skimmed it. "According to this list Shulk, you have 'pelvic fissures'..." Bayonetta tapped Fiora on her shoulder, wanting her to pay attention to her boyfriend. "Care to explain what it is, and how it works?"
"Gladly, so basically these pelvic fissures I have are occasional tears in my pelvis, and it can be understandably very painful..." explained Shulk. The Homs got up, and before yelling out in imaginary pain and sitting back down; several individuals were doing their best to stifle their laughter. "My doctor has no remedy for my fissures, and no home remedies can solve it either..."
"I don't understand what was so wrong with what Sonic and Shulk did, they were just messing around like the others were," Fiora whispered to Bayonetta; the Umbra Witch scoffed at the Homs' response. Her guidance isn't working as well as she hoped.
"Silly little girl, don't you see what is going on?" Bayonetta frowned. "Sonic and Shulk are both following up on everyone's antics - are you both fine with your love interests being followers, rather than being the leaders?" Is this woman trying to guilt trip Amy and Fiora or something, what does this witch have up her sleeve?!
"Wait just a second!" Master Hand blurted out loudly, after looking through the list of ailments with his nonexistent eyes. "Cloud, you never gave Gil your list of ailments!" Justified since that the female Inkling was irritating the swordsman. "Same goes for you Link! What gives?!"
Link: True story, I've never been sick ever in my life. Closest thing I've ever gotten sick was when I had motion sickness, but it's not that serious...at least in my opinion.
Cloud: Eh, what's the point of making a list of ailments for, Gil is finding a healthcare plan. I'll write one down when someone more trustworthy handles the job.
"We have their lists right here!" Aerith barged inside the meeting room, grabbing everyone's attention, with Zelda accompanying her. Both women had the lists of their respective boyfriends in their hands.
"The two of us did the lists for Link and Cloud since they were both stuck with the Inklings," stated Zelda. "And apparently the time they spent with them was all for naught, because believe it or not, Link and Cloud...are both allergic to ink, or anything composed of ink! They have...Inkitis!"
At the sound of this Inkitis virus (obviously fake), there was a collective gasp within the meeting room, with everyone sporting astonished faces. The Inklings were both astonished, as they both looked up at their new best friend in disbelief.
"Why didn't you tell us this sooner?" the male Inkling asked Link. The Hylian looked towards Zelda, who was convincing her boyfriend to play along with this Inkitis shtick and appease to the Inkling.
"Cloud and I didn't tell you two about our conditions, because...because we didn't know how to tell you guys," replied Link. "I was stuck to you, and Cloud was stuck to your female friend, and you were both wanting to spend time with us, because of your differences. Telling you guys the truth would have been devastating."
"Well I get what you're saying, but I still think you and your Inkling friend are both losers for not liking Marie," said the female Inkling; why is she feeling so salty? "Preferring Callie over Marie, I shake my head at you both..." Amy, suddenly feeling the urge to say something, got up and said the following:
"So what if you like Marie, and the male Inkling likes Callie - can't you just put aside your different opinions for the greater good? Besides, it's not like Link or Cloud care for both ladies, they were just saving face only to meet your demands! Sometimes we may have an opinion, behavior, or anything else that is different, but that shouldn't mean that we should antagonize against someone else because they don't think or act the same way you do! I mean, I love Sonic to death, and in addition to being a jerk, he's also an idiot, but I wouldn't love him just because of his idiocies!"
"I believe she's talking about you," Sonic said to Dark Pit. The angel's response came in the form of a faceplam and the shaking of his head.
"Point of the matter is, you shouldn't stay apart because one thinks differently from you. Rather, you should put all your differences aside, and bond together and keep the bond going."
After heeding these words, the two Inklings looked at each other for a brief moment, before getting up from their seats and walking towards each other, meeting at the center of the room. Master Hand was feeling ticked - mainly because the Inklings were now taking the attention away from him and Gil (but mostly him).
Master Hand: Our meeting was going so well, until that Amy brat had to get all philosophical and let the Inklings have their moment. But what transpired afterwards was just...
"Sorry for starting that argument about Team Marie and Team Callie earlier today," the female Inkling apologized to her male counterpart (seriously, these kids need names real quick). The Inkling held out her pink for a pinky promise of sorts. "Wanna be friends again?" In a not-so-dramatic moment, the male Inkling extended his pinky finger to the female Inkling's...and the two fingers were entwined.
"Friends forever, just like we had promised," the male Inkling responded with a sincere smile; the female Inkling smiled back. This touching, heartfelt moment was suddenly ruined when Mario, Isabelle, Toon Link, Takamaru, and Olimar fell through the air vent in the ceiling, crashing unto the table.
"Olimar, you buffoon, this-a isn't the attic!" Mario frowned at the astronaut. It seriously took Olimar that long to unlatch the air vent. How very sad...
"Ah, Mario, Isabelle, glad that both of you are here!" gleamed Master Hand, ignoring the fact that these two crashed on the meeting - although the Inklings already had it on hold with their little moment. "We're having a meeting to discuss the ailments the residents have, and Gil just found a suitable healthcare plan!"
"Actually, to tell you the truth, Master Hand...I didn't find one," confessed Gil, shocking Master Hand and everyone else in the room. Ha, and you thought he found one didn't you? Never trust a fake librarian! "I fibbed about it so everyone would assume that I did a great job...but instead I ultimately failed. Only reason I took up upon the task was so I could spend more time out of the library, and now the time I've spent has gone to waste. So sorry everyone."
"Does Luigi have his own separate healthcare plan and insurance plan, since he lives out on his own now?" Olimar perked up, raising his head. "Why not ask him to extend his healthcare to all of us!"
"Why that's a splendid idea!" exclaimed Master Hand, who went from angry to joyful in the blink of an eye. Gil should thank Olimar for his suggestion, otherwise he would have been punished greatly from Master Hand. Fibbing about finding a healthcare plan is no laughing matter. "Mario, would you be a dear and ask Luigi if he can extend his healthcare plan to us?" Mario gave the giant hand a thumbs up. "Excellent, then it's all settled. Meeting adjourned!"
So everyone got up and left the room, with some individuals heading off to Ashley's room to return the young witch's potion bottles. It's back to square one in potion making for Ashley.
"Thanks for saving me and Link from those Inklings," Cloud thanked Aerith as the two exited the room. "That Inkling chick was driving me insane, but it's a good thing I didn't unleash my anger on her..."
"Gotta hand it to ya Amy, those were some powerful words you said back there," Sonic said to Amy, as the two lovebirds left. "Don't you think so Shulk?"
"'Powerful' wouldn't be the right word to describe it - but I still think that was a resounding speech," replied Shulk, also with his woman, Fiora. Bayonetta glared at Amy and Fiora as they departed and shook their heads, salty that they both defied the Umbra Witch - especially Amy.
"Meeting went along better than I expected, Master Hand and Gil really bought in to the diseases and allergies we had to show them," Falco conversed with Samus outside of the meeting room. "Girl you're a savage for that Cyrus Virus thing, I couldn't have made that one up at the top of my head!"
"Honestly I enjoyed that meeting, it was kinda fun," smiled Samus. This was an actual, genuine smile, and Samus literally said the word "fun"! When was the last time you ever heard her say such a word?
Samus: Like Amy had said, or at least alluded to, we're all different, and sometimes we have different senses of humor. For me, my sense of humor is slightly twisted and sadistic - making Gil look like an ignorant fool was an absolute blast for me. Really wished the humiliation could have lasted a bit longer, but like the old saying goes, all good things must come to an end...
"Of course-a bro, I'd be happy to extend-a my healthcare plan-a to the mansion residents, anything-a for you guys!" Luigi said to Mario at the front door, accepting his brother's offer to extend his healthcare to his fellow brawlers residing at the mansion. "Just gotta ask-a Daisy for permission first..."
"She'll-a come around eventually," assured Mario, knowing that Daisy cares too much about the brawlers...well, maybe except for certain ones. "I'll be speaking with-a you later tonight!"
"Okay bro, see-a you later!" And with that, Luigi closed the front door, and Mario was making his way back to the mansion...until he was stopped in his tracks by Toon Link and Takamaru, both smiling suspiciously.
"So we went back inside the air ducts, even though Master Hand warned us not to..." Takamaru began. "...and we found the attic! And it had treasure!"
"THIS kind of treasure!" Toon Link showed Mario a Pure Heart - blue in color, just like the plumber said. This heart artifact hovered in the air, its power illuminating from it. "We found the Pure Heart for you, safe and sound!" Mario didn't listen - he was too busy admiring the Pure Heart, his eyes in an obvious trance, before he shook his head and regained his composure.
"I don't think I can-a thank you boys enough for this," Mario said as he grabbed the Pure Heart, holding it with both hands. "I'll find a way to pay-a you both back for this. Once my proposal to-a Peach becomes a rounding success, I'll know just-a whom I should-a be thankful for!" Mario returned to the mansion with the Pure Heart, hoping to put this artifact in a place that is easily accessible, but no one but him can see it. Toon Link and Takamaru looked on, watching the plumber walk away.
"Luigi already had his moment in the sun of love..." remarked Toon Link. "Now, it's time for Mario to have a moment of his own!"
